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Batman, Flash, several other members of the Justice League and the entirety of Young Justice stare at the newcomers. “What,” Batman’s words are neither a question nor a statement, but rather a demand.
The alternate version of Batman turns to the alternate Flash and asks, “Time travel?”
Alternate Flash nods and smirks in amusement, “Undoubtedly.”
“I hate you,” Alternate Batman calmly informs his Flash.
Alternate Flash’s smirk widens into a shit-eating grin and he cooed, “Aww, babe, I love you too!”
Batman’s frown deepens and Flash’s eye twitches. Alternate Batman allows himself a smirk, “Look at their faces.”
Alternate Flash stifles a giggle, “I think we broke them, Wing. Fistbump!”
The Justice League and Young Justice are morbidly fascinated when the alternate Batman concedes to alternate Flash’s request for a fistbump. Alternate Batman laughs, “Oh calm down! I’m not even the same Batman as him,” he points towards Batman and then towards Flash, “And this Flash certainly isn’t Barry Allen.”
Alternate Flash pulls off his cowl and grins at the gathered crowd, “Wally West at your service!” He pulls a ridiculous bow and hip checks his Batman. “This Batman certainly isn’t BW, trust me.”
Batman’s eye lenses narrow, “Then that must make you Robin.”
Nightwing grins at Batman and nods, “Yup! Though you all can call me Nightwing to distinguish me from Batman and my younger counterpart.”
Robin looks at his older self in curiosity, “Why Nightwing?”
Nightwing shrugs, “Uncle Clark’s bedtime stories.”
“I’ll go by Wallace!” Alternate Flash cheers, happily cutting over whatever biting remark Batman was undoubtedly going to say about Nightwing’s choice in names.
“Of course you will, you dork,” Nightwing smiles fondly at Wallace, much to the horror of the gathered teens.
“Please stop smiling,” Wally weakly requests. Wallace snickers.
Nightwing smirks, “What’s bothering you about this situation, really? The fact that someone in a Batman suit is smiling and it’s strange or the fact that I’m banging your future self?” Wally lets out a small whimper. Wallace snorts and continues to laugh. Wallace swipes at the tears that are streaming down his face and waves away Barry’s concern.
Robin twitches and concedes, “You are hot, Wally.”
“Not you too!” Wally glares at his friend.
Robin shrugs, “It’s true. I have eyes.” Wally studiously ignores Connor and Artemis’ snickering.
Wallace collapses against Nightwing, continuing to laugh. Nightwing grins fondly at his boyfriend and runs a hand through his hair, “You okay, babe?”
Wallace waves a hand in the air and chokes out, “Yeah, yeah.”
“Pull yourself together,” Nightwing laughs, “You’re scaring the kiddies.” Nightwing’s statement causes Wallace to start laughing even harder, his shoulders shaking with mirth. A few seconds pass and he finally pulls himself together.
“God, you’re a dick,” Wallace informs Nightwing.
“Haha,” Nightwing deadpans, “like I haven’t heard that one before.”
Wallace grins, unrepentant. “I don’t know, Rich- oof !” Wallace huffs out a pained breath when Nightwing hits him in the stomach, “ Hey! ”
“ Do secret identities mean nothing to you? ” Nightwing hisses, gesturing toward his younger self, “He’s only thirteen and still bound by Batman’s orders not to tell the Team his identity.”
Wallace has the grace to look embarrassed, “Right. Sorry. I love you?”
“God, you better fucking love me with all the bullshit I put up with,” Nightwing rolls his eyes.
“Uh, ex-fucking-scuse you! Do you know how many times I’ve tripped over your stupid suit in the middle of the night because you can’t be fucked to put it in a secure location like a normal vigilante?” Wallace pulls an offended face, “I know you never see them, but I get like ten bruises a week.”
“That’s what she said,” Nightwing takes a second to act like a ten-year-old, “Also, not everyone can have a suit that fits into a ring, so.”
Wallace raises an eyebrow, “It would be lost on you.”
“Hey now! My Nightwing suit would look fan-fucking-tastic coming out of a ring and that is a sentence I never thought I’d say in my life. God, let Deathstroke stab me with his katana blade.”
“Ugh, that guy,” Wallace groans.
“Mmmhmm, tell me about it,” Nightwing nods, “Creepy fuck has been lusting after me since I was seventeen.”
“I mean, dat ass tho . But still hella creepy,” Wallace agrees. Nightwing and Wallace nod at each other sagely and fistbump again. “Remind me to put him on my ‘beat the shit outta’ list again.”
“Ha! I’ll make an appointment reminder for you and B once he’s feeling better. Bane really fucked him up this time,” Nightwing grimaces.
Wallace gives Nightwing an appraising look, “Is that why the…” He gestures toward the cape and cowl, “...monkey suit?”
Nightwing ugly snorts, “It is indeed why I have to wear this god awful thing for at least another month. The Blud is really, really needing me back there since Blockbuster is tromping around again.”
“Again?! I thought Supes successfully cowed him into submission.”
Nightwing shrugs, “Yeah, it worked for a hot second but then he decided he wants a few last hurrahs before his head gets too big for his body and kaboom.”
“Kaboom?”
“Kaboom,” Nightwing confirms, hand gestures and all.
Wallace snickers, “Is that a scientific term? Can I quote you on that?”
Nightwing lets out a peal of laughter. Wally and the other Young Justice members shudder. Even Robin looks a little disturbed by the current conversation. “Imagine B’s face if he read that in a mission report.”
“I’m imagining it and I’m not very pleased with how your future appears to be,” Batman grumbles. Next to him, Barry looks horrified.
Nightwing shrugs, “It isn’t so bad. Hey, mini-me, do you have a spare mask?” Robin pulls a mask out of one of his belt compartments and throws it over. Nightwing deftly catches it and tells Wallace, “Cover me,” Wallace nods and moves in front of Nightwing as he turns around and removes the cowl. The cowl gets shoved into Wallace’s arms and he rolls his eyes but holds it dutifully. Nightwing turns around again and moves next to Wallace, “ Freedom! ”
“Here,” Nightwing instructs Wallace as he pulls off the bulky outside gauntlets and throws them at his boyfriend. Wallace briefly fumbles when the cape comes flying at his head. Nightwing hits the chest pieces and they pop off, leaving him in a black undersuit. Nightwing takes the pile of stuff from his boyfriend, wraps it in his cape, and plops it on a convenient table. “Double freedom!”
“Awww, there you are,” Wallace coos as he pats Nightwing’s cheek, “Much better.”
“No more fucking cape,” Nightwing stretches his arms, “That’s literally all I’ve wanted since I’ve put that thing on.”
“But you look- oof !” Wallace groans when Nightwing smacks him in the stomach.
“If you were gonna say that I look cute in a cape,” Nightwing threatens.
Wallace gestures toward Nightwing’s younger self, “ Adorable .”
Nightwing looks at Batman and pleads, “Please say you spontaneously have to drag me into an interrogation room and grill me to kingdom come.”
“Adorable baaabbyy!” Wallace teases Nightwing, “Precious angel~!”
“Please?” Nightwing bats at his boyfriend who has decided to hang off of his arm like a limpet.
“How come he gets to go without a cape and I have to wear the god awful thing?” Robin demands Batman, stalking right up to his mentor, “I could be more acrobatic without it!”
“You know why you have to wear it,” Batman deadpans, “Wallace, control yourself.”
Wallace immediately straightens up and gives Batman a wonky salute, “Sir, yes, Batman, sir.” Wally snickers into his hand and Robin grins at his best friend’s older self.
Nightwing pushes Wallace off of his shoulder and informs him, “You disgust me. You never listen to me when I’m being Batman.”
Wallace shrugs, “Yeah, but I’m older than you. Also, I’ve seen you wear pink Superman PJs a few too many times for the dark, scary thing to work on me.”
Robin groans, “Wally!”
Nightwing, however, preens and takes a cheesy model pose, “And I look fabulous in them! They really emphasize my ass ets.”
Wallace snorts, “You’ve had them so long that they’re basically a crop top and booty shorts. Too many times through the dryer,” Wallace says to the group in a loud whisper. “He refuses to get new pj's and throw these out.”
“They’re sentimental!” Nightwing protests, “Little wing got them for me!”
“Yeah, as a joke! Ask Arsenal, they were supposed to be a joke.”
Nightwing flails dramatically, “That makes them even better! Do you see the face little wing makes every time that I wear them? It’s the best part about being a big brother.”
Wallace hisses, “Then control the little demon. He almost stabbed me the last time I was at the Manor.”
“Little D just doesn’t know how to express his feelings yet?” Nightwing tries. He sighs in defeat at the acidic look Wallace gives him, “I’ll talk to him about not stabbing people. Again. Maybe if Agent A gives the talk, he’ll finally listen to the rule.”
“Holy stabbing, Batman! In the future, I’ll have a little brother that stabs people?” Robin cries in alarm.
Nightwing waves off his concern, “You don’t have to worry about that for several years yet, so don’t. We should really just worry about sending the two of us back to our own time.”
“I think I completely agree,” Flash interjects, “We should really deal with that. Kiddos, go on back to your training. We’ll send someone down from the Satellite shortly.”
Nightwing gathers up the Batman suit, grabs Wallace’s hand, and follows Flash and Batman towards the Zeta tubes. Robin, Wally, and the rest of the team stare grumpily as their entertainment disappears around the corner and through the tubes. Wally turns toward Robin, “You really think I’m hot?”
“Is that really the most important thing we should be talking about?” Artemis asks.
Robin ignores the interjection and replies, “Yeah.”
“Oh. Cool,” Wally nods, “Cool, cool, cool. Um, do you maybe want to go out sometime?”
“I thought you weren’t okay with the thought of us dating?” Robin raises an eyebrow in judgment. Zatanna and M’gann stifle snickers behind their hands.
Wally brushes at the back of his hair in embarrassment, “I just said that ‘cause I wasn’t sure you were cool with us dating. But obviously it works out for them, so why not us?” Wally gestures toward the tubes.
“Then in that case,” Robin smiles, “I would love for us to go out sometime.”
Wally grins in reply. The serene moment is interrupted by Black Canary’s entrance. “Are you all ready to kick each other's asses?”
“Are we just supposed to ignore that our future selves appeared in the Cave?” Wally frowns as he addresses Black Canary.
She pauses before nodding her head and firmly replying, “Yes. On Batman’s orders,” Black Canary smiles when the gathered teens groan and head towards the training room. “Works every time,” she cackles to herself.