Work Text:
There are a few things that make Jisung freeze up – and the small black velvet ring box that he’s holding is one of them.
He brushes his fingers against the side of the box, feeling the softness that graces his fingertips. When he pops the box open, the rings are staring back at him, glittering gold under the bright lights of the store.
The seller has been trying to get Jisung’s attention for a while, frustration lacing his every word as he fails to get an answer every time. Jisung is too busy inspecting every inch of the rings. He’s transfixed by it–it’s real, it’s there, and it’s really happening.
“Sir? Sir? Is everything okay with your order?”
The decision to buy a pair of rings might have been impulsive, something out of the blue – he took just a look at the front of a store and, in the next minute, had already placed an order. But the idea had been running on his mind for a long time.
Marriage was something that he and Renjun had talked about enough times to know where they stood when it came to that, though the furthest they’ve ever gone after some talking was creating a shared Pinterest board who had been empty since then.
“Sir?”
Jisung snaps his head up, closing the box and sliding it over the desk so the seller could wrap it up.
“Oh–yes, yes. Everything is great,” he manages to say, feeling his mouth too dry, heart fluttering too fast against his chest.
He can’t stop thinking about what his future with Renjun might look like with a marriage in the way – which, honestly, wouldn’t be that different from their current situation. Jisung is very aware of all their friends’ jokes about how they act like an old married couple since they first started dating.
But now the easiest part was done – he had a ring inside his pocket. Now he just needed to pop up the question and not die of embarrassment halfway through it. Though it seems very unlikely because it’s kind of impossible not to lose his cool and flush uncontrollably when he’s looking at Renjun’s pretty, pretty eyes.
It doesn’t matter that they’ve been dating for years and he’s seen Renjun in his worst days – Jisung is very aware of how weak he is when it’s about Renjun and how sometimes he can’t form a coherent sentence because holy shit, Renjun is right there and they’re really together and in love. And Jisung can only wonder–how did he get so lucky to end up in that position?
Two weeks later and Jisung is at a café with Jaemin, catching up with his friend who seems to never have free time in his schedule even though they text the entire day.
“You’re not wearing your ring,” is the first thing that comes out of Jaemin’s mouth after they hug each other. He very pointedly looks down at his bare hand and Jisung grimaces. “Shit–did he say no? Why didn’t you tell me? I’m gonna kick–”
“No, hyung. God. No,” Jisung cuts him short, waving one hand dismissively and looking very interested in the stained surface of the table. “Just haven’t asked him yet.”
Jaemin pauses for so long that it makes Jisung look up, finding his friend sporting a confused look as he puts away a wrapped present that Jisung hadn’t noticed before.
“What’s that?”
“Uh… I thought we were meeting because you were going to ask me to be your best man and I bought you guys a gift,” Jaemin says. “But what the fuck, Jisung? Why you haven’t asked him yet?”
Jisung groans, hiding his face behind his hands for a second. “I want it to be perfect for him, but I have no idea how to do that! He raised the bar so high when he asked me out! I can’t compete with that!”
Jaemin fixes him a look. “He literally had to ask you because every time you tried you’d freeze up.”
“Yeah, but did you see his eyes when he was asking? God, he’s really too good for this world.”
Jaemin rolls his eyes. “Relax. You could scare him while he’s in the bathroom taking a shit and you know he’d still say yes.”
Jisung sighs, thinking about how every time that Renjun was scared his eyes would widen but then he’d always break off in an embarrassed laugh, his eyes crinkling at the corner as he rubbed his at sideburns.
“Stop daydreaming about Renjun and focus on me, Jisungie.”
Jisung groans again, crossing his arms against his chest. “This is fucking awful, hyung. I should’ve just waited for Renjun to ask me. I can’t ask him when I still get fucking flustered whenever he says he loves me!”
Jaemin pinches the bridge of his nose, looking up at the ceiling. “Well, that’s your problem. If you can’t do that while looking at him, then just ask him to close his eyes then.”
It's not that Jisung is shy or bad with words – okay. Sometimes it is like that, but it's mostly something that happens around Renjun, where he can't do anything but stare wide-eyed at him as his heart races, almost feeling like he's 15 years old again and stuttering through his words as he tries to get Renjun's number (and failing to voice everything out but, somehow, still getting a new contact on his phone).
And since his talk with Jaemin, Jisung has been thinking a lot about what he can do, the little box always in his pocket because one can never know when the perfect opportunity might arise.
But the days end up passing and he still hasn’t said anything, fidgeting in place. It’s obvious he’s holding something back. Renjun has even asked him what was going on but Jisung brushed it all aside with an awkward laugh. He wondered, briefly, if he should just ask him right there and then, but when he put his hand inside his pocket Renjun was already leaving the room and the opportunity was gone.
He had gotten very close at one dinner, holding Renjun’s hand in his as he said, “Thank you for being by my side all this time,” and Renjun had nodded, his eyes scrunched up and waiting for Jisung to continue, but Jisung just flushed under Renjun’s warm gaze and mumbled something else, cutting it short with a quick peck. Renjun laughed and kissed him again, knowing it all too well how sometimes Jisung would get shy and unable to continue.
And then Jisung realizes that, if he hadn’t been able to do it there, he’d need to come up with something else. Something so different that he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from just doing it.
And then it’s night. It was just a normal week, one filled with too much work for too little time, but Jisung doesn’t think about that when he gets to come home to Renjun every day.
It’s too late and Jisung can feel his eyes burning with the struggle of keeping them open and staring at the bright screen of his laptop, but he has finally finished everything. Renjun had gone to bed after leaving a cup of tea next to the laptop, and Jisung quickly tidies up everything so he can join him in bed.
Renjun is sleeping soundly by the time he finishes changing and slips under the blankets, the curtains pulled to the side and allowing the moonlight to stream through the window, illuminating Renjun’s features with a soft glow. And Jisung can’t help but look, feeling his chest aching with the need of having him close. It clogs his lungs and all that Jisung wants is to tell Renjun how happy he makes him, how much he loves him.
But he doesn’t want to wake Renjun up just to say something like that.
So he does the next best thing – before Jisung can realize what he’s doing, he’s already pulled open the last drawer from the nightstand, retrieving the black velvet box from inside another box, and he slips the ring onto Renjun’s fingers.
It fits perfectly. Like it was always supposed to be there.
The golden band glints under the moonlight and Jisung draws in a sharp breath, burying himself under the blankets. But he won’t be able to fall asleep like that–he’s too nervous, his heart pounding so fast against his chest that he wonders how Renjun isn’t awake yet with the loud noise of his heartbeat.
He can’t do that. He knows he’d spend the entire night awake, wondering what Renjun’s reaction might be when he wakes up and sees the ring, and Jisung can’t spend an entire night fretting over that.
So Jisung throws the blankets away and sits up, slipping the ring off. He holds it tight inside his fist, eyeing Renjun’s empty hand. God. He strokes one finger over Renjun’s knuckles, lifting the hand to press a quick kiss over them. Renjun might not know what happened, but Jisung has seen how it looked and that fuels a fire inside him. He will ask him. He needs to do that.
And he’ll do that when he wakes up the next morning.
When Jisung leans out, trying to put the ring back away inside the box and in the nightstand, Renjun shifts on the bed and Jisung hurries, almost dropping the ring on the floor.
“What is it?” Renjun asks, his voice hoarse, and he breaks off in a yawn, blinking sleepily. “You’re still awake? And why are you… holding my hand?”
Jisung almost freezes, but he manages to pull the blankets over him again, stammering out, “Just–uhh–just wanted to… hold your hand.”
Renjun stays silent for a moment, processing his words with his brain still half-asleep, but then he breaks off in a giggle and enlaces their fingers together. “Okay. Goodnight.”
Jisung mumbles it back, watching Renjun turn to the side and start dozing off almost immediately.
Oh, god.
He stares at the ceiling and it’s almost like he could still feel the weight of the ring in his other hand. Now he knows what he needs to do–and, dear god, he will do it.
Somehow, he manages to fall asleep, even with his mind swirling with lots of thoughts and the anticipation for the next day.
When he wakes up, almost all the courage has left his body.
He doesn’t know how to do that, doesn’t know what to say, and his initial response is to just ignore everything and run away, but there’s something that settled inside his bones, something that uncurled from the pit of his stomach – and even though his hands shake at the thought of doing anything, Jisung knows that he won’t relax until he does something about it.
Under the sunlight, Renjun is just as stunning. And just the sight of him is enough to take Jisung’s breath away.
So Jisung just thinks “Fuck it” and slips the ring right back onto Renjun's finger.
He holds his breath for a moment, waiting for anything to happen, but the birds keep chirping outside of his window and Renjun is still asleep. The world doesn’t come to an end.
Jisung looks one more time to the golden band and picks his phone up from the nightstand, running to the bathroom just so he couldn’t talk himself from taking the ring off again.
jisung:
i did it!!!
hyung i fucking did it!
jaeminnie hyung:
you did it?
omg!!
i'm gonna call injunnie now then
jisung:
oh no!!! he's still sleeping!!!
i just slipped the ring onto his finger
jaeminnie hyung:
WHAT?????
(typing…)
Jisung locks his phone and pockets it away, ignoring the buzzing of the incoming messages.
When he leaves the bathroom – after carefully peeking out from a small gap and seeing that Renjun was still sleeping – Jisung can't help the giddy feeling inside his chest when he catches a glance at Renjun's hand. But, dear god, he has no idea what Renjun’s reaction will be and he can’t be there when he wakes up.
Of course, that makes him go to the kitchen and stress cook the biggest breakfast he’s ever done in his life. He thinks that Jaemin would be proud of his pancakes. He didn’t burn a single one this time.
Jaemin. Oh. His phone hasn’t stopped going off inside his pocket and the stress cooking did next to nothing to silence his worries, so he leaves the device on the sofa and very pointedly doesn’t look at any of the notifications.
Shit.
Maybe he shouldn't have done any of that.
Maybe he’s overthinking again, maybe not, but Renjun definitely deserved something better than a surprise like that–even if it meant half-sentences muffled behind his hand or a written note.
Oh.
He should have definitely gone with the last one.
Jisung turns off the stove and that’s it. He’s going to take the ring back again and write a note. It’ll be at least something.
He pads towards the bedroom as silently as possible, fully opening the door and then freezing in place, knees almost buckling under his weight when he catches the sight upon the bed.
Fuck.
Renjun is up and awake, back against the headboard as he stares down at his lap–his hand.
Jisung feels his body flushing, his mouth dry, barely able to stammer a “Fuck.”
Renjun snaps his head up with the noise, his eyes wide, and then he makes a noise from the back of his throat when he sees him. “Jisungie?”
Jisung can’t ignore him, can’t ignore any of what is happening, so he walks towards the bed and settles on the end of the mattress, trying not to fidget with his hands or combust in place.
“So?” Jisung asks after a while, mustering his almost non-existent courage. He looks at the glittering gold on Renjun’s fingers; he hadn’t taken it off. It must mean something good, right? “Give me your answer.”
Renjun releases a little puff of air, shoulders lowering, and a chuckle spills out from his lips. “You haven't asked me anything yet,” he says teasingly, his eyes crinkling at the corner as he gazes upon him.
Jisung can’t maintain eye-contact with Renjun. He’ll probably burn down. Disappear. Especially when Renjun keeps looking from the ring to him. Jisung clears his throat. “You know... If we got married it'd be very cool. Even though it wouldn’t change much–we already live together and share everything, right? So, like, yeah?”
“Hmmm…” Renjun draws the word, lifting his hand to his face and inspecting the ring from up close. Jisung feels his heart skip a beat. “And?”
“Um... There are even rings already. Like. Easy, right?”
“Oh, so you have one for you, too?”
Jisung nods.
“Let me see,” Renjun says, placing his hand back on his lap.
Jisung gets up and rummages through his drawer, picking up the ring hidden underneath his socks, and places it on Renjun’s hand. Renjun looks at the ring, comparing it to the one in his own hand. They’re practically identical except for the size and a little heart that Jisung asked to be engraved on the inside of Renjun’s ring.
“You haven't asked me yet,” Renjun repeats, looking him in the eye. He’s smiling again, the soft, little smile that makes Jisung internally gush at how cute he looks.
Jisung looks to the side for a second. Surely it must not be healthy at all for someone to be feeling that flustered. "O-oh. I didn't? But you’re even using your ring, though?"
Renjun laughs and shakes his head a little. He leans forward, crossing the distance between them, and brushes a kiss under Jisung's jaw, mouthing the words against his heated skin. "Do you wanna marry me?"
Renjun opens his palm and presents Jisung with a ring in the middle of it. And–okay. Definitely not like Jisung had thought that things would go. But he’s not going to complain about it.
Jisung furrows his brow but he quickly grabs the ring, slipping it onto his own finger and mumbles a quick “yeah” that was too low, but Renjun seems to hear it clearly by the way he kisses him right after.
When they break apart, Renjun holds Jisung’s hand, his thumb brushing against the cold ring on Jisung’s finger, looking at him with his eyes crinkled and full of love. "Now it's your time to ask me, babe,” he says and Jisung groans out loud, hiding his face on Renjun’s shoulder.
He can feel Renjun’s shoulders shaking as he chuckles with his reaction, and even though his throat is too dry and his heart is beating too fast, Jisung finally, finally mutters a "Marry me. Please," that maybe ends up a little too high and too airy for his own liking, but it’s enough.
Renjun hums and Jisung sighs when he feels a hand running through his hair.
"Of course,” he says. “I’d love that.”
Renjun laughs when Jisung makes a wheezing noise, burying his face even more against his shoulder. And though Jisung squirms a little, feeling too hot and too dazed, he can't help but laugh and smile together with Renjun.