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A summer storm rumbles off in the distance, carrying with it a warm breeze and the smell of damp earth. Hoseok's clothes stick to his body in a combination of rain and sweat, skin warm and dewy. He's always hated the humidity of June. Always loved the freedom summer brought with it.
He rolls through the neighborhood, the sound of wheels on pavement filling his ears, feeling reminiscent of his first days on a board. It was on these streets that he learned how to ride, suffering through sprained ankles and bruised limbs, tears of frustration, the rush of becoming one with the wind. The thrill is still there, simmering deep inside him as he watches Jungkook lazily weave down the street ahead of him. He does it for no particular reason, says he simply likes the feeling, plastic bag filled with snacks swaying along with his languid movements.
Hoseok feels everything in that moment, all his thoughts and emotions burning under the setting summer sun.
There’s the freeing feeling of adolescence and everything that comes with it. Warm July afternoons, swatting away mosquitoes, listening to the incessant chirping of crickets. Hair sticking in clumps on his forehead, skin salty from sea water.
One day Hoseok will grow old and look back at moments like these. Long afternoon rides. Sneaking out past midnight. Hopping fences and the sticky sweet taste of orange soda on his tongue.
He’ll think of the way Jungkook's golden summer skin glows even in low lighting. Jungkook’s bubbly laughter as he Hoseok digs his fingers into his sides. Jungkook, with his wind swept hair and sparkling eyes and smile that sets off a million fireworks in Hoseok's chest.
He wonders if the sparks will feel the same when he’s old and grey.
They pull off the street, turning down a path of asphalt leading to their favorite playground. The one that's attached to their old elementary school, the place they first met each other years ago. They come here often, and it's only just started to feel sacred in a way Hoseok can't explain. Maybe because they're older now, no longer the small innocent children he still remembers. A sanctuary of their youth.
They prop their boards up on a nearby bench and climb their way to the top of the playground, feet dangling off the edge and a bag of snacks dropped between them.
Hoseok can't help but fall back into the nostalgia of it all.
He thinks of short stubby legs running around freshly trimmed grass, their moms sitting nearby and occasionally looking at them with a watchful eye, silently telling them “ don't get into any trouble.” “Put that down.” “Jung Hoseok, get that bug out of Jungkook's face.”
He thinks of high pitched giggles, the smell of sunscreen, jungkook's scraped knees and kissing them to make him feel better. Long, warm days and staying out until the street lights flicker on.
He thinks of sleep overs, staying up later than their parents would ever allow, sneaking out just for the thrill of it. Not going too far because they were scared of what could happen, fearful of the things that go bump in the night. They would slip out their windows to just sit on the sidewalk, talking in whispers about meaningless things.
They're in high school now, they're older and maybe a little smarter but not by much. They still sneak out and still speak in whispers, but now their conversations don't feel so meaningless. Not all the time. They talk about life and feelings and worries. Jungkook feels too much and Hoseok thinks too often. They have fights about petty things because they're volatile in their young age, but Jungkook always cries when it’s over and his tears always break Hoseok down piece by piece.
That youthful innocence still lingers in the crevices, and Hoseok holds tightly to it, like losing it means losing the last piece of himself.
His chest is still heaving with exertion as Jungkook shuffles through the bag between them, pulling out soda and chocolate covered banana chips and strawberry lollipops. As usual, everything has too much sugar thanks to Jungkook’s persistent sweet tooth. He says it tastes best after skating all day, and Hoseok can’t argue with that.
They've been riding around town since midday, only stopping for a break now that the sun is setting in the distance. It's a nice view from here, with the sun casting an orange glow on the world around them, sky filled with cotton candy colors. Pink clouds against blue skies, quickly fading to orange, then a deep red as the sun dips further into the horizon. It’s almost hard to believe it was raining not that long ago, but the grass is still wet with moisture and the remaining rays of sun reflect rainbows in every droplet of water. It reminds Hoseok of bright, glittery eyes.
He soaks in the moment, falls back into the nostalgia of it all and decides he wants to feel like this forever. He wants this secure sense of childhood wrapped around him wherever he goes, wants the comfort of having Jungkook close for the rest of his life.
Something scares Hoseok about growing up. Maybe it's the thought of leaving behind the only world he's known, or the idea that things could never be the same again. Change scares the shit out of him most of the time, and college is just a year and a half away. He doesn't like thinking about being anywhere but here, anywhere where Jungkook's not.
It’s understandable, they’ve been attached to each other his whole life. Best friends. Soulmates.
Jungkook’s younger than him by a year and has always hated it, that short distance they'll never be able to close. Hoseok tries to show him that it doesn't matter to him, that it clearly doesn’t say anything about how close they are, but even inside himself there are worries he can't shake. A flashing sign in his head, “COLLEGE” written in big bold red letters. It’s what he worries about most, being apart for a year when Jungkook's in his last year of high school, anxiously awaiting to join his hyung.
Hoseok hates thinking about it, so he doesn't. Lately he lets himself get lost in the moments they share, savoring each and every one. Jungkook, laughing hysterically for a whole diner to hear. Jungkook, curled up into his side even when it’s too hot to breathe. Jungkook, speeding past him, rolling down a hill fast enough to crack a bone if he falls, screaming happily into the wind, the epitome of carefree.
He wants to feel how Jungkook makes him feel for the rest of his life. Young and stupid. Foolishly in love.
If you ask him, Hoseok will say it's been like this for his whole life. It's the kind of love that develops from a grade school crush and turns into something more as the years go by. The kind of love that runs deeper than just childhood friends. The kind of love he'll carry with him everywhere he goes.
Jungkook sits next to him, scraped and bruised legs dangling from the playground platform, looking out into the sunset, and love lingers in the spaces between them. Hoseok feels it. Has always felt. Has never had to ask if Jungkook feels it too, because he knows he does. They speak in a language of their own, meaningful stares and lingering touches and comfortable silence that speaks volumes.
Words that imply more than what they're actually saying.
A love spoken in the empty spaces.
"Do you think we'll still know each other 10 years from now?" Jungkook asks, pulling Hoseok out of the thought of kissing his scraped knees like their children again.
It's not the first time Jungkook’s asked this. Hoseok thinks it's a worry that will always linger on his mind, and he hasn't figured out the perfect answer to wash it away. All he can do is show rather than tell. The only way Jungkook will be happy is if 10 years from now, Hoseok stands next to him and says, "I’m still here."
Today, all he can do is give the simple answer he always gives.
"Yeah," he responds steadily, nodding his head with the word to add emphasis. He personally won't accept any other answer.
"How can you be so confident?" Jungkook asks this time. Usually he drops it, today the question must way extra heavy on his mind.
Or maybe it's driven by other things. The first summer storm. Cotton candy skies. Warm air and pink cheeks and sugar highs, pounding hearts and an unspoken understanding.
"Because you're the only thing in my life I've felt this sure about," Hoseok says, turning his head to find Jungkook already looking back at him. Their eyes meet easily, and Hoseok sees it, that love swirling around in Jungkook's irises, sparkling in the setting sun. He knows it's there. Has always known.
Jungkook's hand shakes when it comes up to cup Hoseok's cheek, just slightly, nerves manifesting for both of them to see. His lips are stained strawberry pink, and when they seek out Hoseok’s own, they taste sweeter than he could have ever imagined.
He tastes like sugar, childhood and familiarity, a hint of excitement mixed in with nostalgia.
Jungkook smiles, wide and bright, knocking their foreheads together, and holds him with steading hands. Sparks ignite around them, crackling summer thunderstorms.
Hoseok feels the youngest he’s ever felt.