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“Ah, Lan Zhan isn’t this nice?” Wei Wuxian asked, stuffing another piece of dessert into his mouth.
“Mn.” Lan Wangji responded, barely taking his eyes off his husband. “Nice.”
Wei Wuxian chuckled and handed Lan Wangji one of the sweets. It was a lotus-seed bun. “Here, try some Lan Zhan!”
Lan Wangji bit into the dessert, pleased by the fact that it hadn’t assaulted his taste buds the same way a majority of the foods in Lotus Pier had.
“How is it?” Wei Wuxian asked, eager for his husband’s reaction.
“It’s good.”
Wei Wuxian stuffed another bun into his mouth. “Good? Just good? Lan Zhan these are amazing!” Lan Wangji briefly noted how whipped he must’ve been to find the crumbs that sprayed from Wei Wuxian’s mouth onto the table endearing.
He could hear a voice that sounded suspiciously like his brother-in-law mocking him in his mind. Lan Wangji ignored it of course, just like he did in real life.
"I wish we had these back in Gusu...” Wei Wuxian sighed, and then shrugged going back to his desserts. “Anyways, Lan Zhan, what do you want to do tomorrow? I was thinking we could…”
Lan Wangji was half paying attention to his husband and half trying to decipher the contents of the lotus-seed bun with his eyes, because if his husband liked them so much, then Lan Wangji was willing to stop at nothing until he was able to recreate them. He knew Wei Ying missed Lotus Pier, and they could only visit so often. Lan Wangji was determined to give his husband a piece of home.
But first, he needed to learn how to bake the dessert.
...And bake in general…
He knew just the person to ask.
~
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Jiang Cheng screeched, pacing back and forth through the kitchen. “Was all of that really necessary?”
“I needed your help.” Lan Wangji replied simply.
“You needed my help? ” Jiang Cheng scoffed in disbelief. “You threatened my disciples to let you into my quarters, blind-folded me and then carried me here, on your back, like a sack of potatoes all because you ‘needed my help’?!”
“Mn.”
Jiang Cheng grabbed the closest bowl he could find and flung it at his brother-in-law. “And how the hell did my husband stay asleep while you were literally kidnapping me?”
Lan Wangji shrugged, evading the bowl with ease. “Brother has always been a heavy sleeper.” Either that or Lan Xichen had been aware, but just hadn’t wanted to be a part of Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji’s schemes any longer, so he’d just pretended to sleep…
It was probably that.
Jiang Cheng threw another bowl which Lan Wangji swiftly dodged again. “What could you possibly want that would warrant all this chaos?”
“I need you to teach me how to bake lotus-seed buns.” Jiang Cheng stared at him. “And I need to learn how to bake in general.” Lan Wangji added, unphased by the large vein that had begun to throb on Jiang Cheng’s temple.
Jiang Cheng abruptly shut his eyes and started counting backwards from ten. Lan Wangji poked his forehead.
“What are you doing?”
Jiang Cheng’s eyes snapped open and he glared at Lan Wangji. “I’m trying not to qi deviate-”
“You can do that later.”
“You-!”
“I need your help now. Wei Ying and I will be leaving for Gusu soon-”
“Thank the gods.” Jiang Cheng hissed, shooting Lan Wangji a nasty glare.
Lan Wangji did not roll his eyes. He didn't.
“So I need you to teach me how to bake today.”
“Today? You mean tonight.” Jiang Cheng sniped. “It’s fuck o’clock, Lan Wangji.”
“Tonight then.” Lan Wangji amended easily.
“And why should I help you? Again, you kidnapped me-”
“Apologies.” Lan Wangji didn’t sound sorry at all. “I will refrain from kidnapping you in the future....if you help me.”
Jiang Cheng glared at him but then sighed. “Fine. You prick. But I’m not doing this for you or for my brother. I’m only doing this so you’ll piss off and leave me alone.”
Lan Wangji’s mouth twitched up into a small smile and Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes.
“Lotus-seed buns, you said?” Jiang Cheng asked, gathering bowls and the ingredients they’d need to prepare the dessert.
“Mn.”
“Alright.” Jiang Cheng set a bowl in front of Lan Wangji. “Oh but before we get to work…” The look in Jiang Cheng’s eyes turned devious. It made Lan Wangji, the ever immovable Hanguang-jun, uneasy.
Lan Wangji tilted his head to the side as if to ask What?
A smirk appeared on Jiang Cheng’s face and Lan Wangji was beginning to regret asking him for help. His brother-in-law rummaged through his pockets until he pulled out a black ribbon.
Lan Wangji stared back and forth between Jiang Cheng and the ribbon before shaking his head.
“No.”
“It’s common baking practice to tie your hair up Lan Wangji.”
“No.” Lan Wangji repeated. Jiang Cheng could hear the pout in his voice.
“Yes. Ponytails are a must.” Jiang Cheng practically sang. “Now sit.” He gestured to the stool next to him.
Lan Wangji shook his head, scowling at Jiang Cheng.
“Don’t forget who you’re here for. Just imagine how pleased my brother will be once he finds out you learned how to bake his favorite dessert?”
At that, Lan Wangji sighed and finally acquiesced. He sat on the stool in front of his brother-in-law, making sure to cross his arms like a petulant toddler as he did so. He begrudgingly removed his hairpieces and re-tied his forehead ribbon around his wrist, letting his hair flow freely.
Jiang Cheng snickered and then yanked Lan Wangji’s hair into a tight pony-tail making the other man wince in discomfort.
“Oh wait. This one’s too loose.” Jiang Cheng didn’t even try to hide his amusement as he yanked Lan Wangji’s hair up at least five more times, re-doing the pony-tail until it was so tight that it was literally pulling at Lan Wangji’s scalp. Jiang Cheng made sure to tie it high up, even higher than Wei Wuxian’s, and stepped back to admire his work.
Lan Wangji’s vicious glare sent in his direction tied it all together. Jiang Cheng doubled over in laughter, unable to control his wheezing because as Lan Wangji stomped away from him, his high ponytail swayed in the air with every step and-
“L-lan Wangji,” Jiang Cheng choked in between gulps of laughter. “You should...you should really wear your hair like this more often.”
Lan Wangji found a knife that was lying around and flung it straight at Jiang Cheng.
Jiang Cheng ducked, still laughing.
“Alright, alright. Let’s get to work.”
~
They were onto their tenth try repeating the recipe.
Jiang Cheng could see hints of a sunrise coming upon the horizon.
He was sure he’d lost his mind sometime after the sixth attempt.
Lan Wangji held out his bowl so Jiang Cheng could taste his batter for the umpteenth time before they started baking.
Jiang Cheng eyed the bowl with fear in his eyes, but nonetheless, he stuck his pinky in and gave it a lick because he was a good brother-in-law and really, Lan Wangji should've been lucky to have him.
Jiang Cheng retched as soon as the flavor hit his taste buds. Lan Wangji sighed, looking less composed and far more exhausted than usual.
He held the bowl above his head, looked to Jiang Cheng for confirmation, and then at Jiang Cheng’s nod, he released it. Jiang Cheng kicked it mid-air, sending the bowl flying across the room just like he had with the nine other failures.
“I thought you were a good cook?” Jiang Cheng groaned, resting his face in his palms. “Wei Wuxian can’t cook for shit, but I thought the juniors said you were okay?”
“Baking is different.”
Jiang Cheng raised an eyebrow. “It’s not that diff-”
“Baking is different. ” Lan Wangji repeated, but then Jiang Cheng noticed the hysterical look in his eyes and severeness of his tone. He decided to let Lan Wangji have his way.
They were both covered in flour, and Jiang Cheng had already shaken Lan Wangji’s ponytail to release the numerous lotus seeds that had somehow gotten stuck up there.
They could’ve given up, and probably should’ve around the fifth try, but both were stubborn to a fault. Jiang Cheng wanted to prove to himself that he could teach someone else to bake and Lan Wangji wanted to prove to himself that he could, and he wanted to do something nice for his husband.
There was no way either of them was stopping now.
“Eleven?”
Jiang Cheng nodded. “Eleven. You get the ingredients, I go find another bowl.”
~
After the twenty-ninth try, the sun had fully risen, and both of their husbands would surely be waking up, but, more importantly, Lan Wangji had finally made an edible batter.
“It’s a miracle.” Jiang Cheng whispered soon after he tasted it. There were tears brimming in his eyes from sleep deprivation and pure relief. Even Lan Wangji looked proud of his creation; it had taken him twenty-nine tries and ridiculously tight pony-tail to get there.
“You know how to work the heating chamber right?” Jiang Cheng asked. “So the buns can bake?”
Lan Wangji nodded, pulling out his fire talismans.
Jiang Cheng carried the wooden board filled with the shaped buns over to the heating chamber and Lan Wangji fired it up with his talismans. Jiang Cheng personally had no idea how to use it since he was rarely in the kitchens, but he was sure they'd be fine. Once the fire was ready, Jiang Cheng deposited the buns inside.
They glanced at each other, small grins playing that their faces until the heating chamber began to make a worrying noise. They turned towards the chamber in confusion, trying to inspect it for any abnormalities, but the noise continued to get louder and louder and-
They froze glancing back and forth at each other and turned around to sprint out of the kitchen, but before they made it outside, there was a loud boom that shook the entirety of Lotus Pier.
~
Wei Wuxian woke up to an empty bed, but this was hardly worrying seeing as, during their visits, Lan Zhan liked to wake up early and take a walk around Lotus Pier with Lan Xichen, letting his husband sleep in. It was one of the many reasons why Wei Wuxian absolutely adored him.
He would’ve liked to sit in bed and sing Lan Zhan praises in his head all morning until his husband returned, but all of a sudden there was a loud noise, sounding like an explosion, that nearly jolted him off the bed.
Throwing on some robes and grabbing his flute, Wei Wuxian ran in the direction of the explosion, bumping into Lan Xichen on the way.
“Have you seen Wanyin or Wangji this morning?” Lan Xichen asked, worriedly.
Wei Wuxian shook his head and together they continued on, following the thick cloud of smoke, the aftermath of the explosion. There was a large, frightened crowd gathered around where the smoke was concentrated most.
Wei Wuxian and Lan Xichen directed the crowd away before preparing to enter the smoke themselves, but then-
Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji appeared from the smoke, covered in ash and soot, looking completely dazed. Wei Wuxian and Lan Xichen gaped at each other before rushing over, inspecting both of them to make sure they were okay.
“Wanyin! Wangji! Oh my god!” Lan Xichen exclaimed with wide eyes.
“What the hell happened? And Lan Zhan, why do you have a ponytail?!” Wei Wuxian blurted. Lan Xichen shot him a look. Right, Wei Wuxian thought to himself priorities.
Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji looked sheepishly towards each other and then back at their respective husbands who were waiting for an answer. But then all of sudden there was another explosion, this one smaller than the last. And from it, a pair of lotus-seed buns were flung right into Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji’s faces.
They caught them, looking at the desserts with amazement. Sure, they were more than a little crispy on the outside, and Jiang Cheng’s kitchen was definitely going to need some drastic repairs...but as they each bit into the bun, delight quickly colored their features.
“Twenty-nine.” Jiang Cheng said happily.
“Mn.” Lan Wangji agreed. “Twenty-nine.”
What’s going on? Wei Wuxian mouthed at Lan Xichen who shrugged, sighing.
“Wei Ying.” Lan Wangji held out the bun to his husband. “For you.”
Wei Wuxian gave him a nervous laugh, “What?”
Jiang Cheng grabbed Lan Xichen’s hands and placed the bun firmly in his palms. Lan Xichen sighed again, placing a kiss on Jiang Cheng’s forehead for the odd yet kind gesture.
“Eat.” Lan Wangji said.
“Are you sure-?” Lan Xichen was apprehensive, and rightfully so because what the fuck was going on and since when are desserts made from explosions?
Jiang Cheng nodded, “Eat.”
Wei Wuxian and Lan Xichen each slowly took a bite out of the buns.
“Wow!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed, grinning. “I still have no idea what’s happening right now, but these are great! Aren’t they Xichen-ge?”
Lan Xichen nodded, “They are very good. But-”
Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji high-fived each other and then promptly passed out, from either the fumes or sleep-deprivation, their husbands would never know.
Wei Wuxian and Lan Xichen sighed in unison.
“I’ll carry Wangji.”
“And I’ll carry A-Cheng.”
“But they look so adorable here, don’t they? So peaceful and sleepy.”
Lan Xichen smiled because despite how chaotic and headache-inducing the pair could be, he truly did love them with all of his heart.
“They do.” And then he added, “You can watch over them for now, right? I’ll send a healer your way. Thank you, Wei Ying.” And then Lan Xichen smiled even more and patted his brother-in-law’s head, not waiting for a reply as he walked away. Wei Wuxain groaned, muttering “Goddammit... It’s that smile. It distracts you from how devious Xichen-ge really is…”
Lan Xichen pretended not to hear anything as he all but skipped away, taking another bite of lotus seed bun.
They really did taste amazing.
~