Work Text:
Daisuke can’t help but worry as Haru seems to drown himself with work more and more every passing day. He’s aware of the idea that being busy keeps your mind away from thinking too much but isn’t this crossing a line now?
Shaking his head from the thought as he walks out of the office and heads off to the building’s roof.
He looks up to the sky as the sun isn’t present, shadowed by the clouds. Almost as if it’s mocking him without the presence of his partner beside him.
The memories of them filled with so much content and happiness hits him and come crossing his mind at the most random time possible.
Like now.
The vivid memory of Haru taking him out for a date to a local festival leaves his eyes brimming with tears and feeling of warmth all at the same time. He remembers it all so clearly in his head that it leaves him thinking, does he remember?
Do you, Haru?
Daisuke crosses his arms over his chest when the feeling of needing to smoke comes rushing like wildfire. Especially at times like this.
He swallows the lump clawing its way through his throat, threatening to welcome the tears down to his cheek as he wills himself to not cry. Not during working hours at least.
He stopped smoking cigarettes a few months after dating Haru. The sight of Haru coughing because of the smoke makes him feel guilty.
Haru said he believes in eternity. He believes they’ll be together for eternity but Daisuke thinks it’s too risky to believe in something uncertain.
He remembers the hurt in Haru’s eyes after he said those words. Remember the peppering kisses he left on the latter’s face as he held him in his arms to soothe him and explain it to him better on why he sees things differently.
Now he wishes that he asked Haru if he believes they’ll be together forever.
He doesn’t know where it comes from but the thought perhaps Haru hated him has been planted in his head for god knows how long after their break up.
It made him think twice when Haru gave him a call, saying he misses him.
But Daisuke knows better than just those simple words. Haru misses them. He misses Daisuke just as much as he misses Haru.
They were so good for each other. He didn’t think he could ever be apart from Haru.
There’s this one vivid memory of Haru talking about them spending eternity together. He held Haru securely in his arms when he said it.
Daisuke didn’t fight it, the ridiculousness of eternity’s concept. Perhaps they will have a chance to spend an eternity together.
He walks closer to the edge of the building so the cold breeze can hit his skin better. Perhaps it can take all these vivid memories with them too.
As much as he hated it, he missed the fights. He can barely remember what the fight was mostly about but it always ended up with a heated make-out session. It’s a win for both parties.
The fight in Haru’s old apartment ends up in dishes breaking on the tiles. Cuts on Haru’s feet and blood on the cream-coloured marble tiles.
There was no screaming because a distressed Haru is a quiet Haru.
But that night, it’s almost as if it was a breaking point for them. The disappointment oozing from wounds that haven’t healed suffocates them.
He remembers cradling Haru to his chest as he cried himself to the brim of exhaustion. Promising Haru that he still loves him.
I love you, I promise.
Those words ring in his mind a lot lately. He wonders if he'll get over this grievance.
Haru hasn’t been to every corner of Kambe's manor despite being lost in it after trying to find his way out on his first trip there.
But every corner of the manor is haunted by the ghost of Katou Haru.
And so is Daisuke’s life.