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It’s around the ten minute mark that Sean begins to regret his life decisions.
He hasn’t run track since high school, and while he has been trying to stay physically active to combat the Freshman Fifteen (even though he hasn’t been a freshman for almost two years), he’s not nearly as in shape as he was in high school. His lungs are starting to scream, and his arm is getting tired from holding his junk in place—partially so nobody sees his business, and partially to avoid nut-tap, the most painful thing one can experience should they have the equipment to do so.
He’s nearing the end of his rope. He needs to take a breather. But he can’t stop . If he stops, everyone gets to fully see him in his birthday suit, and that’s an honor only his few sexual partners are granted. Why did he agree to this anyway? Where the shit did Sean get the momentary courage to strip off all his clothes and run around the university campus?
“You gotta do it bro,” Eric said. “Twenty minutes in your birthday suit for your twentieth birthday!”
Eric had broached the subject out on the quad yesterday. Summer semester was coming to an end, and Sean, Eric, Lyla, and Ellery were all hanging out, soaking in the sun and the relatively relaxed atmosphere campus brought before all of the freshmen moved in next week. Eric and Lyla weren’t taking classes, but Sean and Ellery were (stupid math requirement for his Visual Arts degree was only offered in the summer and the winter, which is total bullshit), and they would often meet up on campus once they were out of class for the day.
“And why exactly do I ‘gotta do it,’ bro?” Sean questioned. His cheeks were starting to flare up just thinking about it.
“Come on, Eric. You know Sean’s way too chicken to ever pull a stunt like that,” Lyla said, throwing her arm around Sean and playfully bumping him with her hip as she slid next to him on the bench.
“What? I’m not chicken!”
“You so are, dude!” Eric teased. Lyla started making chicken noises, and nope. Sean was not falling for this. Oldest trick in the book.
Eventually, Lyla got sick of clucking around like an idiot, and shoves Sean affectionately. “Nah, besides, I don’t really wanna see your dick anyway.”
“Pft, yeah right. You wish you were getting some of this D.” Sean thrust his hips in the air swung his arms down in what was probably the most awkward crotch-chop in history.
Lyla shoved Sean again, harder this time. “ Ewwwww , gross, Sean! Please don’t ever speak of your genitals in such a way to me again.”
But Sean and Eric were both losing their minds in laughter. Ellery sat, chuckling softly, on the side of the concrete ledge that held one of campus’ many gardens—an attempt to beautify the school grounds for brochures, the same half-hearted way they photoshop brown people into the pictures on the cover to make the school look more “diverse.”
Ellery’s always been kind of quiet, and that’s what Sean likes about him. Lyla’s the kind of friend Sean can trust to always call him out on his bullshit, Eric is his loudmouth friend he can tell all of his dirty jokes to—at least, the ones that are too raunchy for Lyla’s fragile ears—and Ellery is his oldest friend, the one he always feels at ease with.
It’s nice, sometimes, when Sean is upset or frustrated or whatever, he can just hop on over to Ellery’s room—he managed to snag a single, which Sean will never not be jealous of him for—and they can just chill. They don’t even need to talk, or do much of anything, really. Sometimes they listen to music, but most of the time they just do their own thing, enjoying the other’s presence in the room even without interacting. His friendship with Ellery is a comfortable quiet.
“Okay, but for real, dude,” Eric started. “If you do this, you’ll be a fucking legend ! You’ll go down in the history books as the guy who streaked across campus!”
“Dude, I don’t think they actually put that shit in history books. Plus, I guarantee I am not the first one to have streaked across campus.”
“Aha! So you will do it!”
“No fucking way, man!”
“I think you should do it,” Ellery said.
They all looked over at him, slightly in shock. “Really?” Lyla said.
“Yeah.” Ellery smiled, softly, sweetly. He wouldn’t meet Sean’s eyes, though, and he was kind of blushing. “I mean, it’s a Saturday, in the middle of summer. Nobody’s gonna be here anyway. You’re practically in the clear, dude.”
He had a point, and Sean knew it. So did everybody else. Eric mentioned something about running “fast enough that nobody could see him,” and even though Sean politely informed him that that’s not how physics work, Eric wouldn’t relent. He pestered him all afternoon until finally Sean agreed.
“But no pictures, and no videos,” Sean said. “The last thing I want is my ass going viral on the internet.”
“Please,” Eric said, giving Sean a mock-judgmental stare. “Your ass is not good enough to go viral anyway.”
Sean punched him in the shoulder. Hard.
“We’ll need some kind of evidence that you actually went through with it, though,” Ellery suggested.
“Oh, we’re gonna be there when he does. And if you think I’m not going to play sexy club music while you strip, then you don’t know me at all,” Eric said, making Lyla laugh and Sean roll his eyes.
So yeah, that’s how he ended up agreeing to run around campus for twenty straight minutes and, with the exception of his watch to keep time and shoes so he doesn’t fuck up his feet, naked as the day he was born. Which, not coincidentally, is today. Well, today twenty years ago.
Just ten minutes to go. Fuck, he’s exhausted. He may not be able to “run so fast that no one can see him,” but Eric did have a point—if he runs fast enough, nobody can tell it’s him. He’ll just be a light brown streak as he tears across the quad.
Oh, so that’s why they call it streaking.
But Jesus shit, is it all catching up to him. Sprinting that quickly worked for the first two or three minutes, but Sean’s stamina isn’t what it used to be, and he’s been barely hanging on ever since. Sweat pours off of him as his bare skin bakes in the summer sun, and his throat is so dry, he swears his tongue is about to crumble up and fall out.
How the hell is he supposed to last ten more minutes of this?
He loops back around to the quad, where Eric and Ellery are waiting. Eric is cheering and hollering, and Ellery is just smiling. Smiling and blushing. Sean makes a drinking motion at them, hoping they’ll understand. Eric doesn’t seem to get it, but the message seems to reach Ellery, because, as he approaches them, he digs a bottle of water out of his bag, and hands it to Sean as he passes.
There’s just one problem with this. Ellery didn’t remove the cap before giving it to Sean. Which means, Sean is going to have to open it himself. And, when you’re running around at breakneck speeds, it is not entirely possible to unscrew the cap of a water bottle with one hand. And Sean’s other hand is currently preoccupied...preserving his modesty.
“Damn it, Ellery,” Sean huffs. He needs this water so bad. Like, he might actually die if he does not get a drink of water in the next thirty seconds. So he really doesn’t have a choice, does he? Fuck. Sean’s stomach twists into knots.
He glances around. Yeah, it’s summer, and yeah it’s Saturday, but there are still a few people around. Some of them notice him and laugh at him (which normally would embarrass Sean but well, this is exactly what he signed up for so it’s really his own damn fault), and some of them are cheering along, but they’re still there, and they still see him. He needs to find a secluded spot out of sight so he can open this fucking cap.
So he rounds the corner and starts making his way towards the library. There’s an alley between the Undergraduate Library and the science hall right next to it, and while some people use it as a shortcut to get to the dorm on the other side, it’s been mostly abandoned during the summer semester, since the aforementioned dorm isn’t one of the ones available for student housing for Spring/Semester classes. It’s perfect. Sean makes his way past a group of giggling girls—he really hopes they find this cute and not super cringe and embarrassing—and makes a harsh right turn behind the library, taking just a brief moment to hide behind the dumpster and catch his breath.
God, water tastes so good when you’re this thirsty. Sean doesn’t even care that it’s warm from being in Ellery’s backpack all day, it’s delicious . He guzzles the whole thing in a matter of seconds—which is good, ‘cause he didn’t stop his stopwatch for this, and Sean actually feels just a slight pang of guilt at the thought of cheating out of a couple seconds of the dare—and tosses the bottle in the dumpster. He takes just another moment to catch his breath, and is about to head back, when he hears a whistle coming from somewhere behind him.
Startled, Sean whips around, throwing both hands over his crotch in the process, and comes face-to-face with another boy, probably around Sean’s age, grinning at him from a few feet away. Immediately, heat rushes to his face.
“Oh, don’t be modest for me, sweetheart,” the boy says calmly. He’s got a very smooth, even tone that almost puts Sean off his guard. His hair is done up in dreads and he’s got a mischievous but relaxed look in his eye.
“Um,” is all Sean can think of to say.
The boy laughs. “Um, indeed. No need to explain, I’ve been where you are before. Last spring, my bros made me streak aaaaaaall down our street. Nearly got stopped by a buncha pigs in the process.”
Sean sucks in his lip. He hadn’t even thought about getting caught by authorities.
“But don’t mind me. I’m just enjoooyin’ the show.” He smirks, and Sean almost laughs at how uncomfortable he feels right now. But like, it’s actually not really a bad uncomfortable?
“Name’s Finn,” the boy says, holding out his hand for Sean to shake. Sean almost falls for it, actually, briefly letting go with one hand to accept the handshake, but he feels his junk shift in his hand and slams the other one back down over it.
Sean has, bar none, never been more embarrassed in his life.
“I’m, um...Sean.”
“Nice to meet you,” Finn says, eyebrows bouncing.
A nervous laugh shakes though Sean, and he finds himself trembling, slightly, as it escapes him. He stands there in an awkward silence for a bit, until his wrist starts beeping. His timer.
Shit, how long has he just been standing here?
Crap, it’s still beeping, too, and he’s gonna need to let go of himself to turn it off.
“Well, don’t let me keep you,” Finn says, giving Sean one more lackadaisical smile before backing his way down the alley, like he’s waiting to watch Sean go. But then he laughs and says, “See ya ‘round, Sean,” but not in a way that seems like he’s making fun of Sean, just like he sees the humor in the situation.
Finn strikes Sean and the kind of guy who can find humor in any situation.
Although, to be fair, there’s no lack for humor in getting caught buck-ass naked behind a dumpster by a cute guy.
Once he’s finally out of sight, Sean quickly lets go of his junk to turn off the annoying beeping object strapped to his wrist, covers himself up again, and starts running back to the quad, his face burning the entire time.
He takes the turn that leads back to the quad, looking for Eric and Ellery, and…
They’re not here. They’re just gone. What the fuck, guys?
When he reaches the bench they were standing by, the bench he dropped his clothes at, he finds it, of course, completely empty. All except for his phone, which sits face-up on the bench.
Sean has to slow down, has to stop, but now he’s just standing in the middle of the quad with his ass hanging out, and Sean doesn’t know if his face can even get any hotter before it just spontaneously combusts. He grabs his phone, and it buzzes in his hand. A text message from Eric appears:
You were taking too long so we left. Guess you enjoyed your newfound nudist lifestyle. ;)
Sean swivels his head, looking for any sign of his friends. Those fucking bastards took his clothes, and he literally can not stand another second of this embarrassment. It’s only when he hears the snickering coming from behind a statue that he catches sight of them.
There they are, holding Sean’s clothes and laughing. When they catch him looking their way, Eric waves his arm at Ellery frantically. “Shit, shit, he saw us! Go! Go go go!” And they take off, carrying Sean’s clothes with them as they sprint down the center of campus.
And despite himself, Sean laughs. “Oh you guys are in for it now,” he says. Then he shouts at them, “Get back here you motherfuckers!” And, laughing, naked as the day was born, and freer than he felt yesterday, he chases after his friends.