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George didn't understand a lot of things.
It's not like he was stupid though, he just looked at things differently and it made him feel left out on certain things, certain jokes that his friends had told and certain ways of viewing the world.
He knew Dream was falling for him, and he didn't know why.
He couldn't tell you when it started, but he remembered when he realized it. It had been late at night, he and Dream had just finished recording a new video and Dream was passionately talking about all the new video ideas he had, barely stopping to breathe in between his sentences. Not that George minded, he liked the nights like these where he could listen to his best friend ramble on about anything that came to his mind. He figures he could listen to him forever. They were still logged into the Minecraft world where they recorded and George kept himself busy running around killing mobs while they talked. He sighs contently as he continues listening to Dream go on and on about an idea of his.
"What's up?" Dream questions, cutting himself off mid sentence. George lets out an awkward laugh, a bit embarrassed now because he had not expected his mic to pick up on it.
"Nothing, I'm just a little tired I guess," and it wasn't a lie- it was almost 4am for the British boy, and he could feel his head feel a headache start to form from the lack of sleep.
"You should probably sleep then," Dream says, voice softer compared to a few seconds ago.
"I guess I could, I kinda wanna stay up with you," George says while attacking a sheep. Dream laughs before replying.
"You don't have to stay up just for me, we can talk tomorrow."
George hums in thought before deciding that sleep did sound nice, and leaves the Minecraft world.
"Yeah, you're right, goodnight Dream."
"Goodnight George, I love you," was the last thing he heard before he left the call.
Looking back, George didn't know why this sentence that was said to him so often made everything seem so different. Maybe it was the way his voice had sounded, it was low and quiet, like if he said it too loud it would shatter something. Whatever it was, it made George feel way too anxious to sleep as much as his body craved it. He laid awake in bed thinking. One short sentence managed to make everything else fall into place. All the flirts disguised as jokes became more noticeable, all the little compliments Dream gave George made his heart flutter all the more, and all the late night calls where they could talk about everything and nothing felt so much more intimate.
It made George feel sick. Not that he was homophobic, he couldn't care less what people chose to do with their lives, nor did he care about who people wanted to kiss. It made him feel sick because he didn't understand. Why was he so special? Why out of all people did Dream like him? George was ordinary and plain and nothing like Dream. Dream was always destined to be something great- like a main star in a movie that fans adored and fawned over. George was an extra, easily replaceable and most people wouldn't notice or care if he was gone. He just knew that Dream could do so much better than him. He knew he deserved so much more than what he could offer. Dream was already so successful in his life, and it was all so well deserved. George didn't want to hold him back. George didn't want to slow him down. George didn't want him to like him. So naturally, he drifted away.
Conversations between the two became less frequent, they only talked when recording or streaming. George left the call immediately after they were done, no longer staying for long talks that led into the early hours. He would always give some excuse about how he was busy, that he needed to help his mom with something, that he needed to sleep, or anything else that granted him time away from Dream and his feelings. It was better this way, he told himself. He didn't want to ignore his best friend, he just wanted things to go back to normal. He wishes that Dream didn't like him the way George liked him. He was fine when it was only him with thoughts of his best friend being more than that. It was manageable then because he didn’t bother to think of the possibilities of them being together. Thinking was one of George's favorite pastimes now that he didn't spend a majority of his day on call. He liked to think about holding hands with and kissing the very person he had been actively ignoring. He liked thinking about all the things they could do together if he could own up to his feelings. He liked thinking about all the things they could do together if George was enough. That was a word he kept coming back to, it reminded him that all of the things he was thinking were completely and utterly foolish. He felt a twinge of guilt pull at his chest when he got a message from Dream. He was asking if he wanted to play a game of BedWars with him, and he cleared the notification as soon as he got it. If he was gonna be ignoring him, he didn't want to feel any more tempted to message him back. So he closes his phone, and finds something to distract him from his own emotions.
This had gone on for about two weeks at this point, and to be honest, George didn't know when to stop. He didn't know if he could. He thinks that maybe things could go back to normal once Dream finds someone else to like, someone that would be worthy of all the love that he gave out. But it's the heavy feeling of uncertainty that weighs down on George, it eats him up. He doesn't think he's ever felt this guilty before, he knew that Dream was probably asking himself what he did wrong to deserve such harsh treatment from his supposed best friend. That he was probably just as scared and confused as George was. And George didn’t get it. He knew that Dream was at least sad, their fans had tweeted about how off he was in his last stream; messing up usually simple things and just overall, not seeming like himself. But George knew it was for the better. Even if it hurt Dream now, it would hurt so much more when he realized that George wasn't who he thought he was. He was just speeding up the process at this point. He didn't know how to stop it, so he got comfortable not talking to Dream, ignoring the guilt he faced for every missed message, every excuse he made, and every time he wasn't there for his friend.
It only took another week for George to crack.
The messages he got from Dream had gotten more desperate over time. It was obvious that he wanted to talk- he even got his other friends so message George on his behalf despite him acting completely normal with them. It was late for George, and he was looking at all the messages he got from Dream when his icon changed to green. Quickly, George changes his status to invisible so he doesn't have to talk.
Dream: hey
Dream tries calling him and George immediately declines it. He couldn't talk to him, he didn't know what to say.
Dream: George I know you're online
Dream tries calling him again, and George declines it again. If he couldn't do it over text why did he think he would be able to do it on call? George was a coward. Dream should know this.
Dream: please, I just want to talk :(
Dream calls him for a third time, and George bites his lip letting it ring. He accepts it.
"George!" Dreams loud voice cuts through his headphones. George doesn't know what to say, he pauses for a second.
"Hi," he says after a moment of silence.
"Is that all you have to say? Why were you ignoring me? Are you okay?" Dream starts off as angry but he ends his sentence with a soft tone, and George hated him for it. He was supposed to be mad at George for ignoring him. He wasn't supposed to be worried about him. He was supposed to hate him now.
"I'm fine. I've just been busy lately is all," George lies. He knew that Dream knew that, he knew he could see right through him.
"You're a liar," Dream sounds annoyed, and rightfully so. But what was George meant to do? Tell him all what he had been feeling? Tell him the truth? He lets the call go silent.
"I know that you like me," he finally decides on. It seems to catch Dream off guard because for once, he doesn't know what to say and the call goes silent again.
"Is that why you've been avoiding me?" he questions, voice cracking in the middle of his sentence. George doesn't get a chance to speak before Dream starts again.
"Because- I can try to make it go away. I don't want anything to change between us and I'm really sorry if it makes you uncomfortable, I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I'm really sorry. I really value our friendship and if I could make these feelings go away I would," he lets it all out in a rush and George is sure that he's crying from the way he trips over his words and the way his voice gets all shaky right at the end. It breaks George's heart.
"That's not why I've been avoiding you, Dream," he starts, trying his best to comfort his friend while still trying to tell him how he feels. Dream stays silent save for a sniffle, and lets George explain himself.
"I just.. I got so scared that you liked me- because I really like you too. But I know you could do so much better than me and you deserve so much better than me and it wouldn't be fair for you to be stuck with me. I didn't want to trap you so I pushed myself away. I'm not as good as you think I am," his voice rang out and then silence. There were no more secrets between them and as scared as George was to be vulnerable in front of Dream, it felt so nice to not have the weight of all he was holding in keeping him down.
"George.." his friend takes a minute to collect his words.
"I- you think I could do better than you ?" he lets out a soft laugh before continuing, "I don't want anyone else. I want you. You're more than I could ever even ask for. You're so funny, and kind, and you're really easy to talk to, and you’re always there for me. How could I not want to be with you? George, I love you for who you are even if you don't think you're enough, believe me when I say that you are," his voice is so soft, and George blushes at his words.
"You.. you want to be with me?"
"Oh my god-" he cuts himself off with a wheezy laugh before continuing, "Yes you idiot! I wanna be with you," George can practically feel Dream's smile through the call.
"Okay."
"Okay?" he says laughing.
"Yeah, I wanna be with you too," George says, feeling giddy and smiling like an idiot.
"Okay, so we're boyfriends now?" George nods and then realizes that he doesn't have his facecam on.
"Yeah, I guess we are," he says letting out a giggle and the call turns quiet again.
"I'm sorry I avoided you," he says feeling guilty all over again, smile turning into a frown.
"Don't be sorry- you were scared and I don't blame you. Just.. next time don't completely ignore me when you're feeling like that, I wanna help you through it, okay?"
"Okay."
And just like that, they're okay again. Not only okay, but they're now boyfriends . George still feels warm and fuzzy at the thought of dating Dream and it still hasn't settled in that it's actually a reality. It was definitely gonna take some time before George starts thinking that he's enough for Dream, and he feels himself slipping quite a bit at the beginning. Dream kept his promise though and helped George every time he was insecure in their relationship; reminding him that he loved him for him and he wasn't gonna leave him and find someone else. And it took awhile, but George finally understood. He finally understood why Dream liked him, and it felt so good to finally get it.