Chapter Text
Chapter 1
“Just breathe, Ophie, just breathe.” His hand was currently being crushed as he raced alongside the hospital gurney as the blonde haired woman was trying to do as he requested.
“Levi, it hurts.”
“They’ll take care of it, baby, I promise.”
By all rights, it was a miracle they’d been able to get here in time. They’d both been terrified of her delivering at home, given the rate at which Mothers died to natural births. Levi hadn’t wanted to take that chance in the slightest. It was only because of the fact of his rank in the military that he’d even been able to get the room at the local hospital Up until Levi told his commanding officer about his wife’s fears, they’d been expecting to have the delivery at home, even though neither one of them had wanted that. Thankfully, they had prepared for it anyways. Just in case they needed it as a last resort.
“Corporal Rivaille, you need to let go for now.”
“I’m coming in.” He refused to let go of his wife’s hand.
“I am not objecting to that, but there isn’t space leading up to the delivery room.” He hesitated and listened to the doctor’s words, letting go, having to stop and move aside to let them rush past him.
The doctor was right, however, the corridor not being enough for himself and the others to be around the bed. She needed medical care over his reassurance right now. He knew she was going to be alright. They both did.
“Levi!!” His name was shouted the second he entered the delivery room accepting the gown he was handed, pulling it on hastily as he went over to his wife on the bed. “I’m scared.”
“Don’t be, you’re fine. I’m not leaving you.” Their hands were joined again, the grip like a vice and it actually made him wince slightly as she gripped with all her might.
If anyone told him, and countless people had, that childbirth was beautiful and natural, he’d tell them they were crazy.
The only part that was worth the thirteen hour process, was his child at the end. The second he laid eyes on her, she became the centre of his whole world. Seeing his tiny and fragile daughter, in the arms of his best friend in the entire world, was a moment that money just couldn’t buy.
But she was taken away from them as quickly as she’d been given in to Ophelia’s arms.
“Wait? Where are you taking her?”
“We are just going to get her cleaned up, you can have her back soon, I promise.” The nurse was nice enough, full of smiles and affection for the pair of them.
“Be… Be careful with her…”
“She’s not my first newborn, Corporal.”
“Baby…” He looked around to his exhausted partner, who was looking towards him dreamily. “She is perfect. She looks so like you already…”
“Then she’s screwed, unless she suddenly gets your stunning looks.” She laughed weakly and Levi offered a small smile, his grip on her hand staying tight. “She’ll be back, alright?” Ophelia nodded weakly, clearly far too tired to keep up as Levi spoke to her.
“Sir? We are going to take her to her room now.” Levi nodded, leaning forwards to kiss Ophelia on the forehead gently, a hand touching his cheek seconds before she lost consciousness.
An hour later, he was sitting be Ophelia’s side, stressing over their daughter. They’d not been allowed to see her and the staff had not brought her back to them yet. He was starting to miss her to the point it was stupid. He’d seen her for only a brief few seconds and every one after that had been agony of not being able to be with her.
Ophelia was still unconscious, and in a half stable condition. Apparently the stress of childbirth on her body had been too great, and it was currently trying to repair itself.
“Corporal Rivaille?” He looked up from here he was looking to their joined hands, both of his own having captured his wife’s. The first thing he saw was a startlingly fluffy pink blanket.
“I’ll return you to your daddy now, honey bunch.” As the nurse spoke to the baby, he carefully let go of Ophelia’s hand and moved towards her, hesitating as he got there not knowing how the hell to even hold her correctly. “It’s the easiest thing, I promise.” The nurse handed her over and he was surprised at how easy it was, cradling her within his arms. It was the best feeling in the world and he was stunned. “I’ll leave you to it. I’ll be back for her later.” Levi couldn’t even respond, feeling so proud and elated that he thought he was going to fly away.
People like him didn’t get this chance. Not ever. It was rare and he felt so privileged.
“Levi...?” He looked up as he heard the soft voice of his wife calling out to him. She was watching him with a tired gaze.
“Hey… honey…” He walked over to his wife carefully, moving to her side and even more carefully sitting down next to her on the edge of the bed. He smiled, and then handed the baby over to his wife slowly, helping Ophelia to hold their daughter in her weak arms carefully.
It was then that the tears started to fall and he scooted closer to place his arms around her, pulling her into him as she cried.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m just… I’m just so happy… they’re happy tears.”
“They better be.” His voice was low, carefully and soft as he looked down towards them both, “what are you going to call her?”
“I want you to name her.”
“No. I can’t. It’s not my right, Ophie.”
“Without you… she wouldn’t be here…” He looked down at her, brushing her hair out of her face gently as she spoke softly.
“You’ve helped me so much, we should pick together.”
“Levi, we’ve helped each other… If we hadn’t got married, it could have turned out worse for the both of us. Just, please… this is my one wish…” He hesitated for a few moments, before nodding, resigning to the fact he wasn’t going to win this.
“Fine, ok, I’ll name her… but… it might take me a while, I want it to be perfect.” Ophelia laughed slightly, resting her head back against his shoulder.
“Anything you pick will be beautiful.”
They sat in silence for what seemed like hours, just being with each other and their newborn daughter made them both feel happy and content. The entire time, Levi was going through names in his head, testing them out mentally until he found ones that he liked. He would then test them all out by saying them out loud, and then reject the ones that he didn’t like by shaking his head and saying, “that’s not her.”
After a while, Ophelia couldn’t hold back her laughter. She handed their child back to Levi because she was too tired to keep on holding her.
“If you keep on saying random names, you are going to confuse her.”
“Sorry, baby girl, I’ll find you a good name. I promise.” He moved back to the chair he’d originally been sitting in, holding the baby close to his chest as Ophelia looked on with tears in her eyes and warmth in her heart.
“Levi… I’m… I feel tired.”
“Don’t push yourself, sleep if you need it. If you need anything else, let me know and I’ll get it for you.” She nodded before falling asleep. The last thing she saw was her husband, fussing over their daughter nestled safe and sound in his arms.
Three days later they still hadn’t been released.
Ophelia had developed an infection, and that coupled with a heart issue they’d found while checking her over post pregnancy, had resulted in her falling ill.
It wasn’t looking good, and the only bright side was that their child was doing extremely well. She was healthy and safe; the cutest bundle of joy they’d both ever seen. She was now in Ophelia’s room because Levi insisted on her being there as much as possible. He wanted as many family moments as they could get, just the three of them.
They’d both resigned to the fact that Ophelia didn’t have long left, even if he still didn’t want that to happen. There wasn’t anything much more the doctors could do for her other than make her comfortable. And it wasn’t until late that afternoon, that Levi made any positive contributions other than the clear observations.
“Lucina.” Levi stated rather matter of factly.
“What?” Ophelia asked, not sure what her husband referring too.
“Her name.”
“You decided?”
“Yeah. I think Lucina suits her.” He looked at the baby girl in her mother’s arms lovingly.
“Lucina Ophelia Rivaille.” Levi said the full name out loud.
“Levi…”
“And before you object, she’s already got my surname. So, let her keep your name, please.”
“That’s not what I was going to say.” She chuckles softly. “I was going to say that it’s perfect…” Levi was the pinnacle of a proud father in that moment, and then it all seemed to take a turn for the worse.
“Baby Lucy…” Ophelia said to her daughter, lovingly.
Everything happened in slow motion as Ophelia’s arms began to become slack. Levi’s were around the small child quickly, holding her safe and steady, the blondes face became still as her eyes closed.
“NURSE!” His voice made Lucina begin to cry as he screamed for help. Clutching the child to his chest as he backed way, giving the doctors and nursing staff room to move and do what they did best.
Save lives.
“Corporal, you need to leave.” Someone instructed him. He didn’t need anyone telling him twice, so he hurried out of the room and went down the hallway. He could still see the door from where he stood, but he was far enough so that he couldn’t hear what they were saying or doing inside his wife’s room. He focused on getting Lucina to calm down and stop crying. His attention was still on the room, completely on Ophelia as he rocked the baby close to his chest.
He could barely breathe, he could barely think. He didn’t want to hear the commotion happening in Ophelia’s room as he scrunched his eyes closed, Lucina had begun to calm down, and had already stopped her crying. She was resting quietly within the strong arms of her father. She had no idea what was happening, and he envied her completely in that moment. His grey eyes met Lucina’s own bright watery grey slowly.
All of a sudden, silence filled his hearing, and he heard nothing. Coldness washed over him.
Silence wasn’t a comfort. It never was, and never had been.
“She’s… She’ll be fine, baby girl, I know she will... She’s a fighter…” He’d believe the words with his own dying breath. He refused to admit that she’d held on long enough just to hear her name. He couldn’t do this alone. She wasn’t allowed to leave him. He couldn’t lose his best friend.
“Corporal…” He looked up from Lucina’s face, tears having made tracks down his face without his knowledge, eyes shining with those that had yet to fall. “I am so, so sorry. There was nothing that we could do.” He had no words. None at all. His brain was turned off, and nothing was being sent to his body to tell him to move, to tell him to take care of the child in his arms.
Levi felt a person next to him, prompting him to look as they took hold of his daughter; grey eyes watching the nurse hold Lucina carefully as she looked towards him. “We’ll take care of her. We’ll give you time, sir.” He looked past the nurse to his wife’s room.
If he went in there, if he looked upon the room, it would solidify the fact that what they were telling him was true.
His body slowly made him stand. His brain protesting as his feet carried him forwards. His body was like ice; it didn’t feel like his own. It felt more like someone else was controlling his body, making him face the sheer reality that his best friend was no gone…
His hands skimmed the doorframe; seeing how the body was barely covered from their attempts to revive her. She was stunning even in death, the female lain out on the bed as if she were sleeping. His body moved against his will, his hands pulling the cover over her form and covering her to the shoulders, moving her hands with careful precision so that they rested over the blanket. He was slow to sit by her side, holding her warm hand within his own two, clutching it.
She could definitely be sleeping.
The tears fell poured out of him like a dam breaking, he couldn’t control them, and he definitely couldn’t stop them. More importantly, he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to stop anything right now. He just wanted her back. The woman that had been his light, within so much dark.
They’d been each other shields, a way for them both to exist without the watchful eye of a society that was all too quick to burn someone at the stake. Them getting together, getting engaged, getting married having a child, was all part of the disguise that they’d put in place to shield themselves from the harm that would befall them otherwise. Somewhere along the way the feelings had developed, not quite love, but a deep seeded affection neither of them wanted to deny.
“You…” his voice cut short, watery eyes on Ophelia’s face. “You… you can’t leave me… You can’t… I can’t cope without you. You’re… You’re my best friend, Ophie… How am I going to raise her without you? She needs you. I need you.” He felt like he should be angry that she’d left him, but all that filled him was sadness and despair. His hands reached out to clutch the woman’s left like it was his tether to Earth. “I can’t do this without you. I don’t know how to live without you. They’ll… They’ll.”
If anyone were to find out the truth… he’d lose his rank, his job, and their daughter. They’d take her away without a second thought, without even a second glance. Maybe they’d shoot him in the back while they were at it, put him out of the misery of losing not only his best friend, but his life and his daughter to boot…
Even if she was born from a confusing situation, a rouse to keep up the mask of that perfect happy couple ready to start a family, he still felt such love and affection for her already. It was as if that tiny baby had replaced the gravity holding him to the floor, like she was the only thing that mattered now. And she was. There was nothing more important than her right now, and his eyes lifted, lifted to look at Ophelia’s face, his body moving to stand.
“I will do my best, and hope that my best will be good enough to keep her safe.” His right hand remained clutched around Opehlia’s, his left hand lifting to push soft strands from the woman’s forehead. He leant down to kiss her forehead, eyes closed, hovering there as he tried to steady his breathing. “I will never forget you. You will never be forgotten. I promise. I won’t… I’ll never leave her. Not now, not ever.” He dropped one more kiss to her forehead, before letting go of her hand and stepping back, grey eyes darting over the lifeless body of someone he’d been with for six years.
The best six years of his life…