Work Text:
M: hello, numbers neighbor :)
A: uh who's this
A: and what did you call me?
M: Numbers neighbor! we basically have the same phone number, but just one number off!
A: Oh.
A: …
A: Um, okay…
M: By the way, do you like spaghetti?
A: ...
A: I fucking love spaghetti.
M: Dude, that's awesome. My neighbor hates spaghetti.
A Well, has he ever had it with garlic bread?
M: Hold on, I'm going to ask.
A: Wait, you're gonna ask..now?
M: Yea, he has an open door policy.
A: Oh. Okay.
M: No, he never has.
A: ....
A: What?!
A: Tell him to try it with garlic bread, STAT.
M: Okay, BRB.
M: He says he doesn't like garlic.
A: Doesn't like garlic? What is he, a vampire?
M: Dunno. BRB
M: He says he's not a vampire.
A: That's exactly what a vampire would say...
A: Anyway that's interesting.
M: ...what's interesting?
A: That you live next to a vampire...
M: Who said he's a vampire?
A: Well, does he ever go out in the day?
M: ...
M Not that I know of...
A”: Have you ever seen him bringing guests in at odd hours?
M: ...
M: Now that you mention it...
A: See??!
A: I made you more aware.
A: :)
M: Okayyy....
A: So, you don't find the fact that you might be living next to a vampire, interesting?
M: ... Never thought about it.
A: Well I find it extremely interesting.
A: Hmm
A: If you got nothing to do, maybe we can explore that together sometime..."
M: Wait...
M: Did you just try to invite yourself over?!"
A: What? No!
M: It certainly sounded like you were..."
A: ....
A: Well I'm intrigued about the possible vampire you've got living next door.
A: I mean…
A: That doesn't happen every day.
A: And...
A: We already have two things in common...spaghetti and garlic bread!
A: Your life already sounds infinitely more interesting than mine.
A: So, now I'm intrigued by you
M: ...
M: Boy, you don't get out much, do you..."
A: And..how about you? Like you’ve got a life…
M: What? I'll have you know that I have a great social life, thank you very much.
M: I go out to clubs, I meet ppl all the time...
A: .. And how's that working for you?
M: Well, I'm not the one trying to invite yourself over to a stranger's home and using perceived things in common as an icebreaker..."
A: Never hurts to try, never know what can happen."
M: Well...I do have to hand it to you. I do admire spontaneity in a person.
A: ...OMG did you just say you find me interesting?!
A: That you like me?"
M: ...
M: Uh what?
M: No no no no no
M: Hey, you are putting words in my mouth
M: I just said I liked spontaneity in people."
A: Well, does spontaneity make someone...interesting, perhaps?
A: 😊
M: ...
M: ... Man, I hate you
A: Now, let’s not just make assumptions, it’s still quite early on…
A: Anyway, why don't we trade photos before you decide that?"
M: Huh?! I don't want to trade photos with a freak
M: What if you're a serial killer or something?"
A: Hmm.. Thats true..."
M: Wait, what's true? That you're a serial killer?!"
A: What? No!
A: Just agreeing with you that's a possible scenario.
A: I mean, for all intents and purposes you could be one too, and this is how you lure your victims."
M: Ok, now I'm calling you certifiably insane."
A: Yea, says the one who coined the term "numbers neighbor"
M: ...
M: ... Well I was bored.
A : But going back to my argument, we would totally get along.
A: We like spaghetti, garlic bread, we have interesting conversations .
A: And we have a vampire quest to solve. Good stuff indeed!
M: ...
M: Hmm, I guess I can't argue with that. Is 7 okay, then?
A: Wait, you don't want to trade photos, first? I mean, so we know what we both look like?
M: Hmm...this whole thing has been so preposterous, I think we better do a video chat.
M: Just so we know no one's faking
A:: Sure, I don't have a problem with that
(Facetime calling...)
A picks up.
Both A and M are now on the call...
(A stares at M's face, eyes widening. "OMFG he's hot")
A: H-Hey. (M stares at A's face, same expression. “Oh, holy hell…”)
M: Uh, hey...
A: Hey. I'm Alec. And you are...
M: M- Magnus.
M: ..
Magnus: Is Alec possibly short for...Alexander?
Alec: Uh, yea. But I don't usually go by that.
Magnus: Oh.
Alec: But it sounds nice when you say it.
Magnus: (brightens): Oh. (smiles)
(Silence - a minute of goofy smiles)
Magnus: Uh, are you sure you aren't a serial killer?
Alec (knitting his eyebrows together): No, not the last time I checked, why?
Magnus: Because you can murder me anytime, hot stuff.
(Alec's cheeks burn flaming red at this statement, and at Magnus’s sudden low seductive tone of voice, and smirk with raised eyebrows)
Alec: You flirting with me? And…you...think I'm hot?
Magnus: Are you blind?! Anyone would think so!
Alec: .... (Alec has a silly, goofy smile on his face. "This hot guy thinks I'm hot...")
Magnus: So...still up for meeting up? 7pm at my place? Uh, hello?
(Alec is still stunned. Then his face brightens into a grin)
Alec: I'm so there. Text me your address.
Magnus: Sure. (Magnus is seen typing his address into the phone)
Magnus: My apartment is 4D, the last door on the right at the end of the hall.
Alec: Noted.
Magnus Just to clarify, are we still hunting vampires? (Magnus says this with the slightest upturn of his lips)
Alec: ...
Alec: Uh...what vampire? (Alec looks clueless. He seems to have no idea what Magnus is talking about)
(Magnus grins at Alec suddenly, as Alec has not been able to keep his eyes off Magnus's mouth for the duration of their talk and is in a daze)
Magnus: Ah never mind. Just get your cute butt over here…Alexander.
(Alec flushes a deep red, but has a silly smile on his face, and his eyes darken.
Alec: See you soon…Magnus.
*CLICK*