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"I love you."
Three little words. Just three little, insignificant words and yet, they mean so much to him. Soobin isn’t one to say those words freely. He only says them to those who matter; to the only person he’s ever loved.
But he never receives an answer.
It’s better than rejection, he reasons. Every night, when his roommate is already sleeping and no one is awake beside him, Soobin will whisper those words into his ears softly. Huening never wakes up during this, being a heavy sleeper. Since freshman year Soobin has done this over and over, finding it hard not to fall for the insolent and cheeky boy. After a few misunderstandings, they have become such good friends; the best of friends, even if Soobin feels more, wants more.
It’s like his own little routine to whisper those three little words to his roommate before he goes to sleep, but tonight is different.
Tonight is the last night.
His college graduation is tomorrow and he has to move out by five p.m. This will be their last night together.
"Binnie? What movie do you want to watch?"
Soobin glances over at Huening. To commemorate their last night together they had planned to stay in and watch a few flicks, mostly Huening’s favorite movies and whatnot.
"I don't know. How about The Lion King?" he jokes.
Huening, however, takes it seriously and pulls out his laptop, where most of their movie marathons take place. Sitting next to Soobin on the floor, he leans onto his shoulder as he pulls his molang blanket around their bodies.
At first Soobin thought of this to be a flirtatious gesture, but soon he discovered Huening just likes to show his affection to the people he loves by making any contacts. Whether it’s a hand on someone’s stomach or arms around shoulders and waist, he just loves the idea of touching. And it’s not the romantic type of touching either, Soobin knows that very well.
Mid-way through the movie, Huening's head remains still on the blue-haired's shoulder. Completely absorbed with the singing animals on the screen, Huening doesn't look like he minds when Soobin fully brings him into his lap, lifting him quickly and holding him close. Soobin's fingers curled into the younger boy’s hair as he buries his face against him, resting in that hollow place where the solid curve of Huening's shoulder meets the soft vulnerability of his neck.
Soobin breathes into his sweet, floral-like scent as he smiles. Huening always smells good.
Around the time "Can You Feel the Love Tonight?" starts playing, Huening has fallen asleep against Soobin’s chest. With a small smile, he shuts the laptop and lets the silence overtake their room again. He doesn’t want to wake up the sleeping angel so he lifts him up bridal style and carries him to his bed.
"Goodnight, Ningning." he whispers and stops there, heading over to his own bed.
It’s not like Soobin doesn’t think about it; about saying those three little words again. But he doesn’t think it’s going to worth it so he turns away without saying another word.
"You didn't say it," whispers a voice. Soobin’s eyes widen in shock when they meet Huening's sleepy ones. He looks so hurt and confused and it doesn’t sit well with him.
"W-What?"
"Those three little words. You didn't say them."
Soobin walks over to Huening's bed slowly and sits on the edge of it. Outside, Soobin might look all calm and composed, but on the inside he’s having a breakdown.
"What do you mean?"
Huening pouts. "Every night, you whisper those three little words to me. Why is tonight different?"
A lump is caught in his throat. "Because it's our last night together."
"That's not a valid reason!"
"I forgot?"
"Liar."
Soobin sighs. "Because I never hear it back?"
Now it’s Huening's turn to look at him in shock. "What?"
“Look,” he grits his teeth. "If you heard me say them, why didn't you at least reject me?"
“W-What?” Huening's eyes widen further. "What were those three little words?"
Soobin turns to glare at Huening. "You should know. I whispered them to you every night since freshman year. Even when you dated that Taehyun boy."
"Soobin-hyung." Huening's voice is hoarse. "Binnie, what were those three little words?"
His glare turned icy. "I don't see why it matters."
"Soobinie." Huening reaches out for his hand, which he pulls away. "Were those words 'I love you?'"
Soobin laughs dryly. "You should know. You apparently heard them."
Huening shakes his head hysterically. "No! I didn't. I was too groggy to process anything. All I heard was your voice saying three little words."
"Don't lie to me."
"I'm not!"
Soobin stands up. "No, Huening! Don't play with me like this!"
"Binnie, just listen—"
"Why should I?"
Huening glares at him and stands up to face him. "Because—" he starts. He never finishes the sentence, though because Huening has stepped forward and bit down on Soobin's lips.
It’s not a perfect kiss. Their noes bump awkwardly together, and Huening kind of hits the side of Soobin's mouth, but it seems to last forever. Soobin moves without thought, numb and lost. His lips brushing against the line of Huenings jaw, up toward the downturned corner of his frozen mouth. They hover there for an instant, hesitant, caught by memories of doubt; the ghosts of familiar fears that seemed so pitiful now.
"How long?" Soobin whispers when they pull away, eyes closed.
"Freshmen year. After I broke up with Taehyun, I realized I was in love with someone else," Huening whispers back.
"And who would that be?"
"You."
This time, Soobin claims his lips, first taking his chin between his thumb and forefinger. Now, this one is a promise, to make sure no lies are hidden somewhere.
They pull away again.
"I'm sorry I didn't say anything."
Soobin looked into Huening's pretty eyes and shakes his head.
"I wish I had."
Huening gives him an astonished look. "But you did. Every night. I just didn't hear."
Soobin pulls him close again. "What did you hear?"
"Three little words."
"Which were?"
Huening smiles and it would be impossible for him to not smile back.
"I love you."
"And I love you, too."