Chapter Text
*
Soojin’s eyes shot open as the alarm rang loudly from her nightstand. She felt her eyes sting. Two hours really wasn’t enough, she knew that. But she’d rather live her last summer day to the fullest, than regret not doing it a week later. At least that’s what she’s supposed to be thinking.
Her hands were shaky as she brought her phone to her face, to be greeted with a morning message from her boyfriend and an angry text from her cousin, who also happened to be her ride to school that would be arriving in...10 minutes? Oh, god.
Soojin quickly stood up and threw clothes out of her wardrobe. Saw shirts she hadn’t seen in years and jeans she hadn’t worn since eight grade. But then she stumbled upon a red t-shirt, that would for sure show a bit of her cleavage, and she didn’t have to think twice before putting it on. On her floor, just by the pile of dirty clothes, and beside her desk full off used papers and old pens, laid a pair of light-blue loose jeans, and she put them on, but not without falling down to the white carpet. Her head pounded as she met the floor, but she had no time to pout. She quickly stood up and moved to the mirror. Red lipstick. Done.
Just as she’d swept the makeup over her lips the last time, she heard the honking from outside. Quickly, she grabbed a hoodie that was too big for her, because it wasn’t hers, and a bag that already was prepped with everything she’d need. Including the lipstick she just put on. And a brush.
“Goodbye honey!” her mother said as Soojin ran passed the dining room where her mom, her thirteen-year-old sister, her two baby- half siblings and her new stepdad were eating.
She rolled her eyes without giving them a word.
The unrealistically green lawn was newly clipped as she ran over it from the big, white house. It put colour to her white shoes, which wasn’t something she really appreciated, but she didn’t really have time to care.
“Will you ever be in time?” her cousin asked from the drivers seat with a, for her, annoyed tone.
She was much like Soojin wearing a red t-shirt, but didn’t dare to show off her curves. Her brown hair was clipped back on both sides, showing off her remarkable face.
“I’m guessing Hui didn’t let you go last night.” the pink haired passenger said from the seat beside the cousin, as the driver drove off. “That guy really has no finish line.”
“We were... at a party-“ Soojin explained, completely out of breath from her sprint.
“Hey! And you didn’t invite us?” the cousin, Miyeon, pouted.
“- with the dance team.”
“Oh, then it’s better that we didn’t come.” Minnie said and placed her hand on Miyeon’s thigh.
Miyeon looked up at Minnie and blushed when she looked back.
Soojin rolled her eyes from the backseat, but couldn’t help but smile. They really were so lovesick, those two.
When the car stopped again, a small, blonde woman hopped in. She wore an oversized hoodie and a pair of cargo pants, just like she had all summer, even though the sun shone high and warm.
If Soojin had a bad morning temper, then there were no words to describe Jeon Soyeon. She had her hood over her head and headphones in her ears, blasting music she probably wrote herself.
“You look inviting, as always.” Miyeon greeted her and quickly drove off.
Soyeon simply gave her a glare before picking up her phone and started working in the same music-editing program she always used.
*
*
*
“No smoking, no drinking and no snogging.” Mr. Song jokingly said, in their first language, from the couch where he watched the morning news.
”No dad.” Yuqi faked annoyance before kissing his cheek.
“That goes for you too Shuhua.”
“I know. See you tonight.” she said as she put on her converse.
Yuqi quickly put on her black Dr. Martens and blew a kiss to her mom who already had started working in the kitchen.
“Good luck on your first day!” the older man shouted after them as they left the house.
Yuqi looked down at the outfits both of them had chosen to wear, one with a flannel, the other one with a self-customised sweatshirt, and both of them with loose-fitting second-hand-bought trousers.
“Shit, why can’t we ever look straight.” she sighed, but didn’t try to hide the smile on her lips.
They walked down the stairs of the house, passing the old hammock and the broken set of chairs, Yuqi already started getting hot under her blue shirt.
Shuhua was smart enough to wear a tank top under her unbuttoned flannel, but that would be too much shown skin for Yuqi.
They quickly made their way to the new, big building, but didn’t dare to walk inside yet. Instead, they studied the student covering the parking lot. It was unusual to them that students around them drove themselves to school, but it seemed like the opposite here as most of them got out of big, shiny cars.
Most students ignored the each other, but when four girls got out of a black Range Rover, it seemed like everyone stopped around them. All eyes suddenly landed on a tall, foreign-looking girl wearing high waisted black jeans and a white top, holding the hand of another tall girl, flipping her hair around for everyone to see, and beside her a short haired girl with a hoodie on her arm, showing off more of herself than probably was allowed. Behind them walked a smaller girl with a hood covering her head and her hands in her pockets. She was short, but everyone still seemed to back away as she passed them.
“Oh my god...” Shuhua said a little too loudly as the group passed them.
It made Yuqi cover her mouth, which luckily limited the attention they got from the four girls. But the last girl, the scariest of them, turned her head and pierced her eyes into Yuqi’s. But she didn’t walk towards them to fight, or cuss them out, like Yuqi expected. She simply winked. Yuqi turned her head in disbelief that the wink actually was to her, but there was no one behind her.
When they had passed them, Shuhua could finally let out her breath.
“I think I have a crush.” she said, without even realising she did.
In her head flew pictures of the short-haired, how her eyes looked like ‘i-don’t-give-a-fuck’, the mole under one of them only increasing the image. And how her red lips perfectly matched her tight shirt, where-... Yeah, Shuhua definitely had a crush.
“Drop it Shu.” Yuqi broke her bubble. “They’re far too cool for us.”
Yuqi pulled Shuhua inside the building, and got both of their schedules. They had the exact same classes, at the exact same times. Only, Shuhua had a theatre class when she had music composing, mostly because Yuqi sucked at acting, and she didn’t feel like joining a choir at this school too.
“Should we act like we don’t know each other so we don’t have to be those weird chinese girls again?” Yuqi asked as they studied their papers.
“Yeah, totally.” Shuhua quickly answered.
*
*
*
“Hi, I’m Yuqi and this is my best friend Shuhua.”
“Hello.” Shuhua greeted.
The young boy in front of them smiled awkwardly before moving away from them, without introducing himself, or saying a single word at all. Yuqi facepalmed in her head, and Shuhua did it outwardly.
“We’ll try again in college.” Yuqi said between her teeth.
Their teacher opened the door just as Shuhua was about to give up and ‘go to the toilet’, but Yuqi shoved her inside the classroom. They sat down beside each other near the windows, not in the furthers back, but not in the front. A neutral spot, so they thought. Apparently everyone was thinking the same thing, so people looked angrily at them as they passed to sit closest to the teachers desk.
“This will be a long day.” Yuqi muttered before turning her attention to the thin, middle aged man, that called himself their home room teacher.
*
*
*
They had two more classes before the worst time of the day. When their faith in this school really would be decided. It was a game of life or death, and the two freshmen would definitely die if they didn’t up themselves soon. It was lunchtime.
Yuqi and Shuhua had their trays with whatever that brown substance was supposed to be, as they studied their options. They could sit between the people that looked like they were doing maths of some sort, or the one looking like they were doing crack of some sort, but none of those tables really called for them. The students that were just as scared as the two chinese speakers had already filled up the other tables, meaning there was only one option left. On the sides of the red table sat three girls, two almost on top of each other on one side, and one man-spreading on the other. On top of the table sat the fourth girl, with her legs crossed as she spoke passionately about something.
“So I threw her into the container.” was the first thing the two young girls heard as they sat down on the end of the table, not giving eye contact to the older.
“What the fuck Soyeon?” Minnie asked loudly, and furrowed her eyebrows worriedly.
Shuhua noticed the girls becoming quiet, and after a single whisper, she felt a tap on her shoulder.
It was the one girl from the parking lot who held the foreign girl’s hand.
“Hello.” she smiled invitingly. “My name is Miyeon.”
“Shuhua.” the girl quietly said, and Yuqi followed with her own name.
“Our friend Soyeon here,” Miyeon gestured to the crossed legged girl on top of the table, “she noticed you outside before.”
Yuqi’s eyes met her, who intensively looked back at her. A chill sent up her back until she quickly looked away.
Shuhua tried to signal for Yuqi to touch her moist mess of a lunch, but the name caught her attention.
“I’m Minnie, and this one is Soojin.” Minnie said and reached her hand forward to shake both of the freshmen’s hands.
Soojin, the one Shuhua already had a crush on, kept her gaze on her plate in front of her, where a piece of pizza was placed.
“She’s the popular one, so you’ll probably hear her name around the halls.” Soojin’s cheeks turned red.
“It seems like all of you are.” Yuqi said and met the gaze of the small girl again.
“Not really.” Miyeon said. “We’re ‘different’... whatever that’s supposed to mean.”
“Soojin though,” Minnie said, “she has a boyfriend, so she’s ‘normal’.”
Yuqi looked over at Shuhua with those words, but her face hadn’t changed at all. Shuhua’s eyes were locked on the red-lipped girl, studying her face, and sometimes lowering her gaze even more. But when Yuqi caught her, she harshly kicked her under the table.
“Ouch!” Shuhua said and winced, making all ten eyes land on her as she smiled awkwardly. “Um... bug.”
Their eyes were wide as they looked at her, but everyone seemed to forget the happening soon as they shifted their attention to the boy approaching them. Maybe it was just Shuhua’s wishful thinking, but it seemed like Soojin’s gaze was locked on her a little longer than the others’, until the boy leaned down and pressed his lips against her hair.
“Hey baby.” he said with a lazy voice and placed his lip on hers. “Why don’t you ever come sit with the rest of us instead of these emos?”
He gestured towards a table where multiple people in blue tracksuits, like his own, laughed with each other.
“Good morning to you too, Hui.” Minnie faked a smile.
“You know I like you guys.” he teased.
His eyes met the pair of clueless ones, his eyes lingering on Shuhua’s who stared at him angrily.
“Seems like you have two new friends.” he said and reached his hand forward, starting with Yuqi who shook it.
“My name is Hui. I’m the leader of the dance team, but more importantly, Soojin’s boyfriend.” he happily explained as he bluntly shook Shuhua’s hand too.
Yuqi thought he seemed like one of those guys who takes care of his younger siblings and loves his grandma more than anything.
“We’re having auditions next week, so if any of you want to join, feel free to come.” and with that, he walked off, after kissing Soojin’s cheek, which made the girl blush more than she already was.
“I wonder if he does the laundry too.” Soyeon, who seemed to be grossed out, joked.
Soojin hit her leg harder than she probably intended, but that didn’t make her apologies. Soyeon laughed as the girl got offended, and Yuqi tried hard not to join her.
The bell suddenly rung, causing chaos in the cafeteria from everyone throwing their trays and plates to the already tired lunch-lady.
Yuqi hurriedly stood up, making Shuhua follow her moves. But they noticed that none of the other girls did.
“Are we skipping or not?” Soyeon asked, but Soojin stood up with her half eaten pizza.
“You know I can’t, or I won’t be allowed in the competition”.
“Yeah yeah, you go.” Soyeon said and waved for Soojin to leave them, which the girl did.
“I can’t get detention on the first day. My dad will kill me.” Miyeon said and rushed off too.
“I guess it’s just you and me then, foreigner.”
“I don’t even get surprised anymore, really.” Minnie, the foreigner, laughed.
That fact wouldn’t slip either Shuhua’s or Yuqi’s mind, as both of them wondered if maybe she was from one of their countries, but her name really didn’t make it seem like it. Shuhua made a mental note to ask Yuqi about it later, when they were away from the four eyes staring at them.
Yuqi watched the two, as to ask if they were allowed to leave. And when Minnie smiled at them, they took it as their cue. But Soyeon made sure to lock eyes with Yuqi again before she was able to run off. Then the two freshmen hurried away with their backpacks on their backs.
“Well, she is cute.” Minnie said as she watched them.“So?” she turned her attention to Soyeon.
“I want her.”
*
*
*
“I swear to you! She was staring at me!” Yuqi said enthusiastically in the hall as they walked towards their newly received lockers, wanting nothing more than to run out the building as the first day finally was over.
“You’re just dreaming.” Shuhua answered with a broken tongue, making her pause between most words.
“I’m not!”
“Like you said, they’re too cool for us.” Shuhua said in a bittersweet way. “There’s no chance she’s... she’s interested.” Shuhua switched to her first language when she couldn’t think of the word in Korean, making Yuqi switch entirely too.
“I’m not saying she’s interested in me.” she said desperately, waving with her hands in the air like she waving to the entire world at once. “I’m just saying that she was staring at me. And you could hear what she did to that person, she threw them down into a dumpster! I’m scared, man.”
“Calm down.” Shuhua said and put her hand over Yuqi’s to pull them down. “She’s not some kind of maniac.”
“You don’t know that.”
They didn’t need more attention than they already had, so when Shuhua succeeded in bringing Yuqi’s hands down, she quickly opened her lockers, threw both of their books into hers and sighted loudly.
“The others seem nice, okay?” Shuhua said and looked into the eyes of her best friend. “And they’re the only people who’ve tried to talk to us today, so they’re the best chance we have at surviving at this school.”
Yuqi joined Shuhua’s sighing, and rolled her eyes behind the back of the slightly younger girl when they started walking out.
”I like you better in Korean.” she muttered to herself.
*
*
*
Soyeon stood behind the stairs of the school entrance, waiting for her ticket home to come get her. She held a cigarette between two of her fingers, as she rested her hooded back against the wall. Her eyes were watching the freshmen leaving the school, specifically a particular light-brunette girl walking beside a shorter, more black-headed girl. They seemed like they were arguing, the big hand movements and loud voices gave it away. Although Yuqi’s voice seemed like it could cause an earthquake, Soyeon couldn’t make out a single word.
“Soyeon!”
Soyeon suddenly saw Minnie snapping her fingers right in front of her eyes. She had a grin on her face, parts of her bunny-teeth showing.
Soyeon simply rolled her eyes and took a deep inhale with the cigarette between her lips.
“It’s not even lit.” Minnie said and rested her back beside Soyeon.
“I know.”
They stood for a couple of minutes, just staring into the open field of shaking children, and Soyeon remembered how she was the exact opposite. She strutted into the school like she owned the place, and showing she did so by getting into a fight in the cafeteria on the first day. The two older girls pulled her away, while Soojin stood on the side completely cold-faced.
That thought made her think of something.
“Where’s the driver and her cousin?” Soyeon asked, drawing circles with her left boot.
“Miyeon went to get Soojin from the gym.” Minnie said between breaths. “Apparently she’s been there all afternoon.”
“Workaholic.”
“Same goes for you.” Minnie said and pointed to the headphones almost falling out of her pockets. “How long have you been working on that, anyway?”
“I’m making a playlist.” Soyeon scoffed, digging her most precious belonging into her hoodie.
“Oooh.” Minnie teased and poked her shoulder. “You haven’t made one in a long time. Must be for someone special.”
Soyeon rolled her eyes and inhaled once again.
“I’d say it’s for that Yuqi girl, but you’re not that quick are you?”
“Shut up.”
No, it wasn’t for that Yuqi girl. Minnie knew Soyeon’s relationship with playlists. ‘You can’t make a playlist to whoever’ and ‘playlists have to mean something’. But she wondered who it could be for then. Soyeon didn’t exactly have the best relationship with her parents, which Minnie knew even if Soyeon never talked about it. And she didn’t have many friends. And she for sure didn’t have a partner. Who’s left?
“Can I hear it sometime?” Minnie asked.
“Maybe.” and that was enough for Minnie.
She moved her arm to place it around Soyeon, and squeezed her tightly to herself. The younger girl scoffed, but she couldn’t hide her smile, and she didn’t pull away.
With one hand in her pocket, Minnie grabbed the unlit cigarette with the other, and put it between her lips. She brought up a lighter with her earlier pocket-covered hand, and flickered it on. Soyeon studied as she took the poison into her lungs, and breathed out together with the smoke. The older girl offered, but Soyeon declined by bringing her hand up as to say ‘stop’, and Minnie took another inhale.
“I thought you said you quit?” Miyeon said sharply from the stairs where she was walking down with the dancer.
“Shit.” Minnie muttered and quickly threw it down to the ground and covered it with her sneaker.
“And now you’re throwing trash on the ground too?” Miyeon teased.
Minnie rolled her eyes, picked it up and threw it in the nearby bin with a faked smile pointed towards Miyeon.
“Good.” Miyeon said with a content face. “Let’s go.”
They sat down in their usual spots in the car. Miyeon in the driver seat, Soojin and Soyeon in the backseat and Minnie as shotgun. And Soyeon did her usual complaints.
“Why does Minnie always get the front seat?” she asked, faking a hurt voice.
“‘Cause she loves me.” Minnie answered grinning.
“That’s debatable.” Miyeon joked, followed by her own laugh and Minnie hitting her shoulder.
*
*
*
When Miyeon had done her duties, she only had herself to get home. Everyone else lived relatively close, all of them in grand buildings with green lawns and someone welcoming them home. Miyeon had none of that.
She made her way up on the driveway that wasn’t really a driveway, just a place on their lawn where her dad years ago had decided to park his car. Her feet sunk down as they met the ground, and a brown substance covered half of them. The morning newspaper was still laying outside the door, and that’s when Miyeon knew that it was a bad day.
With a shaky hand she carefully opened the door, and became relieved when she didn’t hear a sound. She quietly took a few steps inside, just to see the living room, and the sight was her cue to leave.
She walked back to the car in a hurry. She felt her chest raising painfully, and how her fingers were shaking on her hands. This had happened too many times already, but it seemed to never become easier.
Miyeon, as usual, didn’t call until she was a few minutes away from the house.
”Yeah?” Miyeon heard Minnie’s voice and the sound of a piano in the background.
“Can I come over?” the slightly older girl said, still having a shaky breath.
“Yeah, of course.” Minnie’s voice was shaking too. “Did he do anything?”
“No.”
“Good.” Minnie calmed herself. “Hurry.”
Miyeon’s foot pressed down harder on the pedal as she hung up with her girlfriend. The drive was only about fifteen minutes, but it felt like an eternity.
She instantly became happier when she spotted her love waiting in the doorway.
“Hi.” she said and wrapped her arms around Miyeon. “Are you alright?”
The older girl simply nodded, digging her head into Minnie’s neck. It was starting to become cold and dark outside, a sign that it probably was time for them to get inside.
Minnie placed a kiss on her head before getting them both into the warmth. Miyeon heard the strings of a guitar play as someone hummed along to it.
“They’ve been doing this since I got home.” Minnie complained. “So annoying, really.”
The humming became louder and louder as the rhythm picked up in speed. A boy’s voice filled up the entire house, until it quit rabidly. Two guys’ laugher spread instead, continuing even when Minnie and Miyeon entered the kitchen.
“Hi.” Miyeon said to the two, larger, muscular, very handsome guys sitting on the kitchen counter.
“You’re sleeping here again?” Minnie’s brother, Mic asked after his laughter had ended.
“You never get tired you two, really.” Mac, the twin, joined after finishing as well.
Minnie rolled her eyes at her brothers and gave them a warning look.
“I’m not saying it’s bad!” Mac brought up his hands defensively. “It’s good that my sister gets some. She needs to ease her nerves anyways...”
“Shut up!” Minnie shouted and hit the back of his head.
“Ouch!”
“I was going to ask you if you wanted pizza, but I’m not going to now.” Minnie said and dragged Miyeon after her.
They hurried up the carpet-covered stairs, almost not making a sound, and Miyeon was the first to enter Minnie’s room.
It was soft and light, much different from the girl. The pillows on her bed were white, and the walls were a very pale pink. Miyeon had spent probably more nights in this room than her own during the summer, so falling down flat on the bed didn’t feel strange anymore.
The shorter girl saw the taller but younger girl’s notes by her piano, the book still being opened and ready to be played.
“Keep the door open!” Mic shouted, followed by laughter.
“Shut up!” Minnie grunted and shut the door loudly. “They literally never shut up.”
Minnie groaned and laid down beside Miyeon. They stared up at the roof where the outlines of stars were visible. Those luminous ones everyone had when they were kids. Her room really didn’t resemble her, but it hadn’t been renovated in years, so Miyeon assumed this was somewhat what younger Minnie looked like.
“Are you okay Miyeonnie?” Minnie asked.
She rolled over to be closer to the girl, to give her all of the love she needed. Minnie placed a leg over hers, and an arm on her chest as she placed her head down on the hand that was just under Miyeon’s right collarbone. Miyeon felt her breath against her skin. It made small bumps appear on her body.
When the older girl didn’t answer, Minnie placed a kiss on her neck before moving her head slightly to look up at her. She had her brows furrowed and eyes squeezed shut, and the Thai could see the tears threatening to fall.
“Are you sure he didn’t do anything?”
“He was passed out.” Miyeon’s weak voice said.
Minnie kept looking at her. There were now a few drops on her cheeks, and the older had her forehead wrinkled. The corners of her mouth were tilted down, as she breathed between the two thin lines of lips. She pressed out the air, producing a kind of wheezing sound.
“I’m so sorry.” the younger said and planted kisses all over Miyeon’s cheek. “You don’t deserve this.”
Miyeon let the salty water stream down, while Minnie hugged her tightly and put her lips on Miyeon’s cheeks repeated times. She was met with the wet substance, but she didn’t care.
“I love you.” Minnie said between the last two kisses.
She moved up to sit with her back against the wall, and scooted Miyeon up with her. The older dug herself into Minnie’s side and let the tears meet her shirt, that soon was stained. Still, Minnie didn’t care.
*
