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Airplane Confessions

Summary:

Baz and Simon finally say those three special words in the bathroom of an airplane.

Notes:

Not my best, but still posting it because wHy NoT

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Baz

We’ve been on the plane for about 10 to 11 hours by now. Penny has drifted off to sleep while doing logic puzzles, Shepard has been asleep for 3 hours and is snoring lightly, and Simon is watching crappy action movies nonstop again. I glance over and look at Snow. He looks tired, depressed. He hasn’t been the same lately. We haven’t been the same lately. I still love him hopelessly, I just don’t want that hope to run out. I want to reach out and take his hand, but I don’t know if he would hold mine back. America really took a toll on him. On both of us. I tried telling him how much he meant to me on that beach, just before we left, but he didn’t get it. I need him to get it so badly, I just don’t know how to tell him. I would show him, but every time I lean in, he turns away looking pained. It hurts like hell. I love him so much … I haven’t told him yet … maybe I should. I definitely should. I want to; I’ve wanted to tell him since we were 12, but I was just too scared that he wouldn’t say it back. I’m still scared that he won’t say it back. But I can’t just sit here and watch our relationship fall apart. I mean, it already has, but I don’t want it to burst into flames completely. “Simon?” I manage.
Simon finally looks up, head tilted, eyes emotionless. “Hm?”
We sit there silently until I get an idea. “Follow me.” I unbuckle my seatbelt and stand up. He turns off the movie he was watching and tilts his head. “Come on, Snow.”
He reluctantly pushes himself out of his seat and we carefully climb over Penny and out into the aisle. I motion towards him and start walking towards the bathroom. Simon looks flustered for a second then follows me. He looks like a lost boy stumbling towards the light, and it takes all of my might not to hug him right then and there. I look around, making sure there isn’t anyone watching, then pull him into a vacant stall.
Snow grits his teeth - I think he’s blushing - and says, “Baz, what the hell are you doing.”
I lock the door and turn towards him. Those eyes — his daring blue eyes that I’ve stared - no - gazed at for years gaze right back at me. “I need to talk to you,” I whisper.
“Well yeah, I assumed based on the fact that we’re in a cramped bathroom together!”
I put a finger to his lips. He lets it linger, then I pull it back down to my side. I look down; the sight of him makes me want to hold him so, so badly. I think this is the closest he’s let me since that night in the back of Shepard’s truck. I notice the fatigue in Simon’s eyes. I don’t know what to say, so I start with the one thing he needs to hear. I take a deep breath. “I love you.”
Simon sucks in a sharp breath and his face contorts in pain. I reach for his arm but pull my hand away. “What’s wrong?”
“Just don’t,” he whispers.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t lie to me!”
“I’m not lying!”
“Then how, Baz? How could you love me?” He looks up at me dead in the eyes. “Look at me Baz: I’m a mess! I killed the greatest mage, created the bloody humdrum, I’m supposed to be the Chosen One, and I’m not even a mage! I’m a disappointment to the entire world of magick — I let them all down. I let Penny down, I let the Mage down, I let Ebb down, I let -” His chokes and his invisible tail flicks, knocking over a bottle of soap. “I let you down,” he whispers.
I think I’m starting to cry. (Is that even possible? Can vampires cry?) “No, you didn’t -.”
“Yes I did, Baz! Now I just sit around on the couch drinking cider! I’ve given up! How can you love someone who’s given up? You can’t.”
“Of course I can!” I exclaim. “First of all - I can do whatever I want, and I want you. No one else.” That makes the corners of his mouth turn up a little bit. I take that as a good sign, so I continue. “Second of all - you didn’t let anyone down. You’ve always been bad at magick, and I’ve still loved you, even before we would look at each other. You never meant to create the humdrum, it was the mage’s fault in the first place. Snow, he was trying to kill you; take your power anyway. You were meant to defeat not only the humdrum, but the greatest mage, too.” He’s looking down, his eyes are glistening. I press on, letting everything that I’ve wanted to say to him come out all at once. He’s finally listening to me, so I keep talking. “And I don’t care that you’re not a mage! You’re amazing and beautiful and you can freaking fly! Yes, you do probably drink too much cider, but you have not given up. Not yet. And I’m never, ever giving up on you.”
He looks up at me, tears forming at his eyes. I take his hands, praying that he won’t shy away. “I love you Simon. I love who you were, and who you are. And maybe you still won’t believe me, but I needed to say it. I’ve been an idiot for not saying it earlier. I don’t care if you don’t say it back, or if you still want to break up, bu-”
He cuts me off by planting the softest of kisses on my lips. He weaves his fingers through mine and smiles. I always wanted to either punch or snog that perfect smile. He brings his head closer and his golden curls dance on my forehead. “I love you too.” We stand there in silence for a moment when Simon suddenly brings his head up and laughs.
“What?”
He grabs me by my neck and pulls me closer. “You called me Simon.”

 

Simon

I was scared. I still am scared. I got hung up on my own actions and assumed what other people thought. I never actually gave them a chance. I didn’t want to be hurt. Of course I just ended up hurting myself, but maybe not all hope is lost. To be honest, a part of my brain still tells me that he's saying everything out of pity, but the rest of me is telling me to just shut the fuck up and listen. And when Baz takes my hand; when he says ‘I love you’ - I just try to focus on him and only him. I press my lips to his briefly and start giggling.
“What?”
I smile and place my hands on the back of his neck. I pull him in for a real kiss. “You called me Simon,” I whisper against him.

His lips are warm and soft; I kiss him even harder. He moves his hands up to my back and pushes me back into the wall. I tilt my head ever so slightly and he sighs between breaths. It all comes back to me: All of our previous moments, what I’ve been missing for too long. Warmth and love fills my heart, replacing all of the space inside. Baz kisses the mole on my neck and weaves his fingers through my hair. I take my hands off his neck and move them to his waist. I slowly untuck his shirt from his trousers and slide my hands underneath his shirt. He melts into me and I smile like an idiot, kissing him everywhere from his neck to his hair. I haven’t done this in a while, and it’s been way too long. I’ve missed him so much; I love him so much. He takes his hands down from my head and puts them on my chest, but doesn’t push. I pull him even closer so that there’s not even an inch between us, we’re all matched up. I remove one of my hands from under his shirt and bring it up to the buttons. I breathe in heavily and break them open one by one, happily laughing between each kiss.
Baz pulls away for a second, but he’s smiling from ear to ear. “Crowley Snow, are we going to have sex in an airplane bathroom?”
“No,” I say, bringing my nose to his, “But we are going to have an incredibly hot makeout in an airplane bathroom.” And before he can start another sentence, I go in and attack his pale lips again. I don’t know how long we’ve been here, but at this moment, I don’t care. I’m with the boy - no- man I love and we finally have a moment where nothing is hidden. All our emotions and feelings are exposed, and I know where I’m supposed to be. He pulls away for a second.
“So, is this okay?” he asks.
Our legs are tangled, we’re squeezed against a wall, my hands are in his shirt, his hands are on my back. We’re a mess — and it’s the happiest I’ve been in a long time. “It’s so okay.”
Then someone knocks on the door.

 

Penny

When I open my eyes, Simon and Baz are gone. An unfinished crossword sits in my lap. I rub my eyes and look over to the airplane bathrooms. (We’re sitting in the back of the plane, so we are uncomfortably close to them.) I have a pretty solid guess that the two are somewhere back there. I stand up out of my seat and brush down my skirt. Shepard moves in his sleep beside me. He decided to come back with us to Watford; apparently it’ll be his first time out of America. I look down at him. He is… cute, I guess. When Micah dumped me - er, when I found out he dumped me - it stung. I thought we were going to be forever, but I guess I was wrong. So when this handsome guy started stalking us, I wasn’t ready to open up yet. He persisted though, and maybe when we get back to Watford… I don’t know, maybe I’m just dreaming, but I think he might like me, too. Although Simon and Baz are in a tough spot right now, it might be a bit mean to get into a relationship and shove it in their face. So instead, I tear my eyes away from Shepard and walk down the airplane aisle.
When I reach the loos, sure enough, only one of the bathrooms is occupied. I discreetly cast a “Natures not calling” spell so that none of the passengers feel an urge to… go. I knock on the door.
“Who is it?” It’s Baz’s voice.
I roll my eyes. “It’s me. Penny.”
Another voice says, “Hi Penny!” Simon. I can hear Baz shushing him from behind the door. He unlocks it and slides it open.
Baz smoothes down his shirt. It’s unbuttoned and wrinkled. He has red marks along his neck (Likely from Simon). I think he’s blushing (Is that even possible?), and I avert my eyes. Simon comes up behind him and grins. His hair is tousled and his lips are dry. He wipes a bit of saliva from the corner of his mouth and grins.
I smirk. “So, what are you guys up to?”
“None of your business Bunce,” Baz says professionally, as always.
“We were making out,” says Simon matter-of-factly. Baz glares at him and Simon laughs.
Baz looks out into the aisle. “No one’s looking, Baz,” I reassure him, “I magicked them.”
He frowns. “Bunce, you have to save your magic. Don’t waste it.”
I wave him off. “I’ll be fine Baz. Don’t worry.”
He crosses his arms but obliges. We all stand there awkwardly for a moment when Baz suddenly yelps. I step back out of instinct, then follow his view. Simon has his hand in Baz’s back pocket, squeezing and grinning like a madman. Baz’s cheeks have gone bright red, but he doesn’t remove Simon’s hand. He clears his throat and looks at me. “So Bunce, what are you doing here?”
I shrug my shoulders and look at them. “I just came to check on you two. I woke up, and you two were gone, probably causing some sort of trouble, so I went to find you.” I look at their flushed faces, a smile on Simon’s, and it makes me happy inside. “I’m assuming you two worked it out?”
Simon takes his hand out of Baz’s pocket and grips his hand instead. “Yeah,” he says, meeting his eyes. “We did.”
“You two never cease to amuse me-” I say, getting cut off by the airplane loudspeaker.
“EVERYONE PLEASE RETURN TO YOUR SEATS. WE WILL BE LANDING SOON.”
The three of us lock eyes. “Home.”