Work Text:
Maybe he’s become a bad person. A good person wouldn’t hesitate, wouldn’t be torn, wouldn’t pause and think “maybe I should betray my best friend.” But Tubbo does, so maybe he isn’t a good person anymore.
Tommy… well. Tommy had always been there for Tubbo, except for when he wasn’t. And Tommy had always been kind to Tubbo, except for when he wasn’t. And maybe Tommy had always dragged Tubbo along on missions he didn’t really want to go on, and maybe he had always turned Tubbo down when he wanted to do the same, and maybe he had been hot-headed and started wars that Tubbo had to help finish, and maybe…
Maybe he’s unsure about what to do.
That’s not to say he doesn’t miss them. He does. He really, really does. The suit is suffocating (but was the revolutionary’s get up any better?), and Schlatt’s not the kindest (but wasn’t Wilbur just as bad?). There’s history on this land that’s being torn away for the sake of Schlatt’s industrialist utopia. The van where they took their first stand against Dream’s tyranny (where Tommy tells him to drink this poison, vote for Pog, Tubbo, get us more gravel, Tubbo, do you have any more supplies, Tubbo), the gate where Dream blew up their land (where Tommy stabs him and laughs, where he and Wilbur ramble about politics and he stands behind, so clingy, that Tubbo, so annoying). It’s all going away soon. It holds memories. Good ones, he thinks to himself. Surely.
There’s no room for nostalgia in Manberg. Some part of him is grateful for that, even as Schlatt drags him away from the van to get back to work.
Schlatt calls him his “right hand man,” and Tubbo’s not stupid. They know it’s just some bullshit title that brandishes him like a weapon towards Tommy, knows he’s still just being used, knows it holds them hostage and keeps him in check like he’s some sort of fucking damsel in distress, there to further the Tommy Innit narrative.
He tells himself he doesn’t mind.
Maybe he’s a liar too.
But being propped up into a position of power for the sake of spiting your friend… it’s useful, they guess. Schlatt pretends to listen to him when he talks, and if he says the right things enough times, it gets through. It’s like working with Tommy, except Tommy wouldn’t tell him he’s a fucking idiot for- well. It’s like working with Tommy.
Tubbo is stuck between helping a good person who’s his best friend and a bad person who he’s barely met, and he doesn’t know why he’s stuck in the first place. It should be cookie cutter.
But it isn’t.
And here’s the thing- if Tubbo is a bad person, and Tubbo is a liar… then what’s stopping him from continuing down that train of thought? What’s stopping him from being a criminal, and a traitor, and vengeful and cruel and everything no one thinks he is? Tommy and Wilbur were long gone, run off into the woods to leave Tubbo to fend for himself against Schlatt. What’s stopping him from giving up on the Tommy Innit narrative, really, besides the waning self respect he has?
There’s something about proving everyone wrong that’s enticing. He’s not helpless, and he’s not pure, or wholesome, or some fucking toddler to coddle and objectify and glorify. He can make his own decisions.
Wilbur expects him to be a double agent right off the bat. It’s tempting, it really is. And he’s willing to roll with it for a while, test the waters. He sees their base, and builds their farms, and, well. Honestly, he’s the only thing keeping Pogtopia going at the moment.
Tommy’s never around when he is.
Schlatt expects him to be scared into submission. And he’s scared, he really is. He plays the part well, letting himself flinch and fumble and jump when he wants to. He does his paperwork, he wears his suit.
He ignores Niki and Eret’s pitying looks and pretends it’s not because they think he’s helpless.
He remembers Tommy’s face, Quackity’s face, Ponk’s face, when he burnt down the lemon tree. Of course, he hadn’t said it was him in so many words, but the smell of smoke on his armor, and the burns on his hands had spoken for him. He’s not friends… he wasn’t friends with Tommy Innit for no reason. He revels in that chaos, and it’s fun! But more recently, things have changed. Tommy talks about boundaries, and morality, and restraint. Against everyone but him, it seems. There’s something to be said, he thinks, about the fact that no one ever mentions how Tommy’s the one who’s usually stopping him from stabbing the shit out of things nowadays.
Schlatt talks about power, and expansion, and destruction. It’s scary, but…
Maybe he’s always been a bad person. Maybe, if he thinks logically, his goals align far more with Schlatt’s than they ever did with Tommy’s. Maybe Manberg lets him step away from all the overdramatic wars, lets him build what he wants when he wants, lets him stab what he wants when he wants, for the low, low price of doing what Schlatt says. Which really isn’t much of a change of pace.
So maybe, every once in a while, his paperwork accidentally has the coordinates of Pogtopia’s base neatly hidden in the margins. And maybe, Schlatt stops asking where he’s going as often. And maybe, Tubbo stops taking off the suit whenever he’s out of Schlatt’s sight. Little things. Silly mistakes, surely. What more would you expect from someone as innocent as Tubbo?
And, well… maybe. You didn’t hear it from him of course- must’ve been another one of those crime bosses everyone keeps hearing about, but… maybe burning down a couple of forests sounds a little bit like fun.