Work Text:
Tyler’s not asleep. He can’t sleep. The sadness and heartbreak is roiling through him and all he can do is lay in his shitty hotel bed and stare at the ceiling and think about how they were so close. He’d really thought that it was their year, that they would be able to do this together, but they hadn’t and now all Tyler has left is bitterness and disappointment.
He wants Jamie, can feel himself yearning for the other man, but Jamie had seemed…broken, when they’d left the locker room. He hadn’t looked at Tyler, hadn’t said anything except a few soft, emotional words to the team before he’d left to go back to his hotel room. Tyler didn’t want to push him – if he needed space to process, then Tyler would give that to him. A darker, more invasive thought cut through his thoughts, though, because what if – now that they were done and had lost – Jamie wouldn’t want him anymore? They’d always said later, after, and now it was later and it was after, but they didn’t have the Cup, just loss, and what if Jamie decided that Tyler wasn’t worth it without that to share between them?
He turns and presses his face into the pillow, tears burning his eyes. It hurts losing the Cup, but these new fears of losing Jamie hurt more. Tyler’s still not even sure what they are, but he knows that he loves Jamie and he can’t lose him, not now when he needs him the most.
He’s still stewing in his panic when he hears a card sliding into the lock on his door. He briefly thinks that someone’s trying to get into the wrong room, but then the lock switches off and the door opens. Tyler doesn’t look, just tenses up because there’s only one person who has a key to his room.
Jamie doesn’t say anything, Tyler can only hear the door close quietly behind him and then the soft sound of Jamie walking into the room. He can hear some shuffling, the ruffling of clothes, and then the bed dips behind Tyler. He still can’t turn, still can’t look, but something loosens in his chest when Jamie presses himself along Tyler’s back. Tyler lifts his arm so Jamie can wrap his own around Tyler’s waist, then grips Jamie’s arm tightly as if to hold him there. He can feel Jamie everywhere, their legs tangling together as he presses his mouth to the back of Tyler’s neck. His playoff beard is still there, tickling and scratching his skin, and Tyler shudders when Jamie mouths against his neck. His breath feels good on Tyler’s skin, even if it’s clear that there’s no real heat to it. He’s taking and giving comfort, not trying to start anything, and it settles something in Tyler. He presses further into Jamie, feels a shaky sob escape his throat as the tears finally fall. Jamie holds him through it, doesn’t say anything, doesn’t try to give him false words of comfort. He just holds Tyler, lets him cry it out, drops kisses along his neck and shoulders until Tyler calms, feeling wrung out.
“Thank you.” Tyler says quietly, his voice gravely and rough. Jamie presses another kiss to Tyler’s neck and settles against him.
“Go to sleep.” He tells him, lips moving against Tyler’s skin. “And then let’s go home.”
The flight back to Dallas is subdued, everyone stewing in their own heads. Tyler sits with Rads, leaving Jamie to do his captain stuff and move around the cabin, checking in with everyone. Tyler watches as he talks softly to Kiwi and Nick, as he rests a hand on Nick’s shoulder that seems to leak some of the tension out of the kid. It makes Tyler proud, to see how far Jamie’s come as a leader, how much the younger guys look up to him. They do the same with Tyler, to an extent, but Jamie is Jamie and there’s always been something about him that quietly demands the respect of his teammates. He may not be a loud, boisterous captain like Ovechkin or Weber, but he leads in a way that earns his teammates’ respect, wins them over just like it did with Tyler.
They land, and everyone goes their separate ways with vague promises of touching base before leaving Dallas for the places they call home. Tyler calls Dallas home, and so does Jamie, but he knows that’s not the case for everyone.
“I need to pick up the boys from the kennel.” Tyler tells Jamie as they walk to their cars. “But you could come over later, if you want?”
“Yeah.” Jamie replies, his voice soft. He looks around once they’re in front of their cars, and they’re as alone as they’re going to be in a parking lot, but Tyler still gasps quietly when Jamie reaches over and takes his hand, squeezes, as reassuring as a kiss. “I’ll see you in a little while.”
Tyler wants to cry when his boys come rushing to him, burying him in kisses, their tails going a mile a minute. It makes Tyler feel like he is really, finally, home, especially when they get back to the house and they scatter, investigating their space once again. His cleaning service has aired out the house, making it feel less like Tyler’s been gone for months. He drags his bags up to his bedroom, briefly thinks about unpacking them, then stuffs them into his closet to deal with later. He heads back downstairs instead, fills the dogs’ bowls, then grabs a protein shake from the fridge. The cleaning service threw out everything that would have expired while he was gone, thank god, but that also means he needs to do a thorough grocery shop as he stares at the bare bones in his fridge.
He’s just thinking about turning on the TV when the doorbell rings. The dogs go wild, making a mad dash for the front door and nearly taking Tyler out at the knees in the process. He has a feeling he knows who it is, but his heart still does a funny flip when Jamie’s standing on the other side.
“I know you said later but…” Jamie’s freshly showered, his damp hair covered by a backwards snapback, and he looks so good and Tyler just wants to bury himself in him.
“It’s later.” Tyler smiles and tugs Jamie into the house by his shirt. Jamie follows, careful to avoid the boys as they follow them both. Tyler herds them out into the backyard and then finds Jamie in the kitchen opening a bottle of water.
“Want something stronger?” He asks, and Jamie shakes his head. Tyler wanders closer, hating that he feels hesitant to move into Jamie’s space. Jamie sets the water on the counter and sighs, wrapping his fingers around Tyler’s wrist and tugging until he practically falls into Jamie’s chest. Tyler lets Jamie cup his jaw and guide him into a quick, gentle kiss. Tyler feels a weight lift off of him, and he smiles when Jamie pulls away.
“So, we’re still doing this?” Tyler asks.
“Of course.” Jamie looks confused. “If you still want to?”
“Fuck, yes.” Tyler surges up and kisses Jamie, something harsher and more frantic. Jamie wraps an arm around his waist and holds him as he gentles the kiss, slows it down until Tyler’s whining against his lips.
“Ty.” Jamie says, moving away just enough to get the words out. Tyler opens his eyes and runs his fingers through Jamie’s beard, still there despite Jamie’s shower.
“Come on.” He threads his fingers through Jamie’s and pulls him upstairs toward his bedroom.
Jamie hums inquisitively as he pulls him toward the en suite bathroom instead of the bed, but lets Tyler pull him along until Tyler presses him against the vanity. He pulls out his shaving equipment, and Jamie gives him a sad smile as he realizes what he has in mind.
“I want to do this with you.” Tyler tells him as he sets everything out. “But I think we need a fresh start, if we’re going to do this right.”
“Okay.” Jamie’s voice is rough, but he leans over and kisses Tyler quickly.
He stays still as Tyler uses the scissors to trim Jamie’s beard down, then lets him coat his face with Tyler’s expensive shaving cream.
“All of it?” Tyler asks, and Jamie nods. Tyler angles Jamie’s face as he needs to, the razor gliding smoothly across his skin. It’s been so long since Tyler’s seen him clean-shaven, and when it’s all gone, he looks so much like the Jamie Tyler had first met all those years ago that it makes his heart hurt.
He doesn’t argue when Jamie switches their position and goes to work on Tyler’s beard, gentle and careful with Tyler like he’s something precious. He stares at Tyler when he’s done, runs the backs of his fingers along his cheek. The hurt, the pain of their loss is still there, but Tyler feels lighter with Jamie. They might not have made it all the way, but they’d done more than anyone ever thought they could, and Jamie loves Tyler, and that…
That’s more than enough.