Work Text:
Reggie comes to notice it when he's five. His mom always kissed his knees when he fell. His dad always kissed his mom's hand when she served him dinner. His baby brother tried to throw kisses in the air when Reggie taught him.
Kissing was an essential language little hyper-social Reggie had to master.
And when he got old enough, he got really invested in doing so.
He was eleven when he kissed Sussie Brooks on a dare. His lips tasted of lollipop all the way back home, where he ran. He thought he should've washed his mouth but he ended up liking the blueberry flavor, so he licked his lips instead.
He didn't speak to her afterward until the whole year was over, but Reggie kept thinking the butterflies he felt in his belly had been a good sign.
Luke told them about french kissing when they were all twelve. No, in fact, he didn't just tell them— he promised that was what was gonna be at Jake's party.
And Reggie had washed his mouth over five times that day and stared at his pink, tiny tongue in the mirror for too long before he left.
He kissed three girls that night: Anne Marie, Gloria and Tina. None of them in this so-called french kiss and thank God, because that looked messy in his head.
Luke kissed five, the lucky bastard.
Alex said something about being sick and not wanting to "pass his germs" and everyone grimaced.
Reggie thought he probably wouldn't have been so selfless in Alex’s position. Kissing really was fun and he was growing more and more excited about it as he kept getting practice.
His first real kiss came when he was fourteen, in Homecoming, when he took Laura Williams to the dance and then tried to walk her to her parent's car before she had different ideas and pushed him to the music room to kiss him in the dark.
Reggie, ever a gentleman, only put his hands on her arms and tried not to gasp when her teeth graced his lower lip. It might've been messy, but it felt right.
He didn't do much, didn't think she needed any leading as she clearly knew better what they were doing and when she parted, with a sigh and a smile, she whispered: "Ok, I have to go, I had a lot of fun tonight, Reg."
Reggie let his eyelids fall slowly, totally lost in the sensations he felt, and nodded, wordless. She ran out and Reggie stood there, his hand hanging as he waved goodbye at no one there.
"Are you gonna pass out?" Reggie startled just slightly till he recognized the voice coming from further in the room.
Alex came out of the shadows, holding his tux jacket over his shoulder.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Reggie asked confused but still just happy.
Alex shrugged, looking at the floor.
"School dance getting a little too much on you— oh, or were you here doing something, you know," Reggie wiggled his fingers, with an arched eyebrow.
"You mean like you?" Alex shot back, pointing with his finger at Reggie and then the door, where Laura escaped to.
"You saw that, huh?" Reggie asked smugly. Yeah, he was gonna think about it for weeks to come.
"You standing there like a fool while she did all the work? Yeah," Alex replied, dryly.
Reggie gave him a serious look. "It's called chivalry. Which you know nothing about since you're over here, leaving your girl all alone out there," he said, jokingly.
But Alex's face turned sad and conflicted and Reggie's easiness disappeared from his gut.
"What? Alex, c'mon, I'm joking," he said, reaching for his friend.
Alex dodged Reggie's reach and stuffed his free hand in his pocket. "I know— just...Congrats on the kissing. I'll see you next week," he said and took off.
Reggie thought nothing would've ruined tonight, but he did spend a whole lot of it thinking about what had happened to Alex.
So, he's not entirely sure how it happens at first. He just knows kissing is how you show care and affection, even if his mom didn't kiss him when he fell anymore. Nor did his dad kiss his mom at all now. And Dick only poked his tongue out to mock him now.
But he cares about his family nonetheless. And he cares about his friends.
Especially Alex, who saved his life in fifth grade by being his best friend and borrowing pencils every single day he lost his.
So when Alex — usually quiet and collected Alex — knocked on his window, red-face and visibly upset, Reggie didn't hesitate to let him in.
Mostly 'cause he was also surprised Alex came to him first and not Luke.
"Hey, what's wrong?" Reggie asked, his hands on Alex's shoulders, looking at him.
Alex's eyes traveled his face and Reggie noticed he'd been crying. Reggie felt sick in his stomach that anyone would ever make Alex cry.
"Alex…" Reggie muttered when Alex seemed to be struggling too hard to get off his chest whatever was troubling him. "What is it?"
Alex bit his lower lip and inhaled. "I wanna tell you something but you can't say it to anyone else. Reggie, nobody." Alex looked a mix between scared yet scary.
Reggie swallowed. "Not even Luke?"
Alex's eyes were almost bloodshot. "Especially not Luke."
Oh, boy. This didn't look good. They never kept things between the three of them.
"Ok…" Reggie said, but he wasn't too convinced. What was so bad that he could know about but not Luke?
Alex looked around them and sat down on Reggie's bed. "Alright, so, I was at this gathering my folks had with a bunch of other people from the hospital, other doctors and their kids," he started saying and Reggie sat beside him slowly. "Then there's this girl, she's the daughter of a gynecologist my mom worked with a few years ago and they're all laughing and trying to set us up and—" Alex let out a frustrated breath and then got up.
Reggie frowned at what the big deal was but Alex started pacing.
"— and it's just exactly like Church, you know? They get fixated with me dating some girl and it's pushy and invasive and," Alex turned to face Reggie in his speech and his shoulders fell down. "And I don't want to."
"You don't wanna date?" Reggie asked, frowning.
But Alex's Adam apple went up and down as he swallowed hard, his eyes boring into Reggie's, sitting on his bed.
"Girls, no," Alex let out, his arms hanging to his sides still, but Reggie could see his hands tremble a little.
Reggie needed a whole second for it to click and then he opened his mouth with an "Oh."
"Oh?" Alex asked like he was nearly holding his breath.
Reggie took one look at his friend, anxious and almost losing it, and smiled just faintly.
"Reggie!" Alex pushed him on the shoulder.
"What?" Reggie laughed.
"Say something— something other than 'oh'," Alex demanded, sitting next to him.
Reggie turned to give him a soft look and realized this changed absolutely nothing for him.
So he headbutted Alex on his shoulder before he dropped a little kiss on it. "Congrats on being gay," he said.
Alex turned to him with an unamused stare and pushed him off his own bed with one swift motion but as Reggie laid on the floor, he could hear Alex laugh through his nose.
As it turned out, Luke couldn't know about Alex because the poor fool had a raging crush on him. And Reggie learned the hard way that it wasn't something to joke about.
By 'hard way' he meant that Alex had to throw one of his drum sticks at Reggie's head. He had a bump for a week.
But Alex grew out of it in a couple of months. And Reggie came to realize that maybe they didn't tell each other everything, because Alex and Luke would share looks and hold gazes and there's so much help with History that Luke needs Alex to give him every two or so days that Reggie thinks it's funny he still fails every exam.
And then it was back to business as usual, only that they were a little shifty and bickery for a while. But Reggie tried not to pay attention to that, he had enough fighting at home as it was.
Bobby thought it was amusing all right but Reggie didn't seem to catch the point.
Until they said they were gonna use summer break to take a few months off and 'gather their thoughts'.
"Alex and I promised each other we wouldn't let this thing between us affect the band so, we just think this is the best way to go," Luke explained next to Alex and Bobby nodded on his left.
Reggie nodded along just so he wouldn't get caught not knowing shit.
"Plus, it works because I have the Church camp for this month and Bobby's going to Alaska with his folks so, maybe this can freshen us up," Alex added.
Luke and Alex smiled friendly at each other and the whole thing dawned on Reggie then.
Oh.
He didn't say anything at all. Felt really stupid for not catching up on it sooner enough to make fun of Alex about it. But it was all over now.
He spent the rest of the summer with Luke. Going to the beach, writing music, ogling girls at the pier, playing video games until midnight, and marathoning Star Wars on VHS.
Luke found a new passion for working out and Reggie found a new passion for seeing his friend gain up some muscle.
So much that sometimes his eyes lingered on Luke more than they did on the girls they were supposed to be looking at.
"Reggie, catch!" Luke yelled before he threw the frisbee and it knocked Reggie on the head. " Shit ."
Reggie blinked with the sun in his face and Luke leaned down to inspect him. "Ow."
"Reg, you're bleeding," Luke said with a shock and Reggie felt dizzy enough to think Luke looked gorgeous under the bright sunlight.
It was just a scratch, didn't even need stitches, but Luke still took him home and said goodbye. Reggie had to put on the band-aid on himself and press a kiss to his fingers then his hand to his forehead. Since his mom wasn't around to do it for him.
Reggie stared at himself in the mirror and really wished Alex came back soon.
The second time it happens, he's just excited. Alex is back and they have a bunch of new songs and there's no bad blood between him and Luke anymore.
Bobby still has a few days to go before he's back but Reggie just can't wait so he grabs his bike and pedals all the way to Alex's.
When the blond came out to his front porch after Reggie asked the maid for him, the bassist threw his arms around the drummer's shoulders and kissed him on the cheek. Harshly pressing his lips to the taller boy's face with his hand on the other side of Alex's face.
"God, Reggie, I left for three weeks not three years," Alex said, sounding annoyed but his arms were still wrapped around Reggie's waist.
"I really missed you," Reggie said, letting go of him.
"Why? Was Luke that bad?" Alex joked and Reggie remembered ripped tees and blood on his forehead.
"No, it was great, just—"
It felt weird to think about Luke without Alex. Off, even.
Reggie moved one shoulder up and shook his head. "I don't know, I just missed you," he said, lastly.
Alex gave him a funny look before he threw an arm around him and pulled him closer. "Well, I missed you, too, Regs," he said, and then he dropped a kiss to Reggie's forehead, right where his tiny scar faded away.
The third time it happens, they're both too emotionally stunned to think much of it.
Alex is crying into his shoulder and Reggie's helpless about it. "I'm such an idiot for thinking they would've understood," Alex muttered, sniffling.
They're sitting on his bedroom floor and Reggie's rubbing Alex's bicep — trying not to think too much about how he's grown, too.
Maybe it's from playing drums.
"No, you just trusted them. It's not your fault," Reggie assured him. "Parents fuck up sometimes, too," Reggie added on a more personal note, looking out his big, wide window.
Then he leaned in and kissed the top of Alex's head before he kept hugging him.
They fell asleep like that, only that it was now Alex who was holding him to his chest as Reggie curled up beside him, his back to Alex, cuddling.
It was a blessing that Reggie's carpet was fluffy and stuffed enough that they only woke up groaning just a little.
Reggie turned to see Alex's golden locks falling on his face, a sleepy grin on his face.
The bright, yellow light of the Californian sun crept up into Reggie's room through the big window and lit the whole side of Alex's face, making his eyes lighter when he opened them.
Reggie's belly twisted in his spot on the floor.
Must've been hunger.
"'Morning, Reg," Alex greeted in an amused, throaty tone and Reggie held the moment, froze it in time.
Maybe it was something else.
The fourth time it happens, Reggie thinks he's being sleeky.
They were alone in the garage as Bobby was running late and Luke was held in detention today for blasting too loud in the music room.
"Hey, Alex," Reggie called from the chair, his fingers softly moving across the strings of his bass, barely making a sound. Alex turned from the couch, his cap half-hanging on his face. "Can I ask you something?"
Reggie didn't realize he was coming off as soft and low as he did but Alex raised one eyebrow and threw a tiny laugh.
"Ok, this is gonna be interesting," Alex trailed as he adjusted himself on the couch so Reggie would shoot.
Alex’s usual mean demeanor with him didn't hide the fact that Alex always cared. Reggie might not be the smartest but if he knew anything, he knew that.
Because Alex would snicker but he would still listen, and he would complain but he still would have your back every day.
"How did you know?" Reggie asked. And it seemed to take Alex back a bit but Reggie goes, "You know," with a look and that makes Alex roll his eyes.
"Yeah, Reggie, I know you're not asking me about Newton's law," he said. But then he went, calmer, "Honestly?"
Reggie nodded from his seat. Just to assure him; Alex was always honest, anyway.
"I think part of me always knew," Alex shrugged. "You know when you start noticing people like that, and you're just like 'oh, this interests me, this doesn't'. Like that," he said.
"That's why you didn't wanna play spin the bottle when we were kids," Reggie realizes.
"Yeah, it's also why I felt like shit after Homecoming, cause I had to pretend and I never wanted that," he explained. "It's why I told my parents, too. I hate for people to think I'm something I'm not," he added.
Reggie can't think of someone more genuine than Alex.
Well, except for maybe Luke.
"Why do you ask?" Alex inquired, tilting his head.
Reggie thinks of summer beach walks with a shirtless Luke and Alex's bright, greenish-blue morning eyes.
"Oh, you know me, just thinking," Reggie said, waving a hand off.
Alex raised his eyebrows. "Oh, so you do do that?" He joked back with a fake smile.
Reggie fought the urge to poke his tongue at Alex and then tried to stop his train of thought after thinking of 'his tongue' and 'Alex' in the same sentence.
"Hey, Reg," Alex said, bringing him back. Then he bent to put a hand on Reggie's knee, exposed in his ripped jeans, and looked at him. "You know you can tell me anything, right?" Alex asked.
But Reggie looked at Alex's hand on his leg like it was clawing on him and he shifted around and smiled nervously.
"Yep, I know. Thanks, Alex," he said, quickly and rushed, and bent to take Alex's hand off him subtly but ended up dropping a kiss to Alex's knuckles instead, before nearly jolting to his spot by his amp.
Alex sat there staring at his hand open and like a saving bell, Luke came running into the garage.
"God, I hate high school. Ok, let's get started," Luke said, breathless and Reggie pretended he didn't mind Alex's vicious stare at the back of his head the whole practice.
The fifth time it happens, Reggie's coming up empty with adjectives to call it.
So, he'll call it love. For lack of a better word.
It's a few weeks before prom but a few hours after their first crowded gig. Bobby even managed to sneak in a few beers to celebrate and they were all sitting in Luke's backyard.
Luke's eyes were shiny as he laid his head on the arm rester of the couch, sipping on his beer and whispering the lyrics to Now or Never. Bobby was all the way to the side, with Luke's feet on his lap.
Reggie watched Alex watch them drink all the illicitly acquired alcohol and they both laughed when a burp escaped Luke's mouth.
"Maybe you've had a little too much," Alex said but he was smiling, the bottle in his hand was only half-empty.
"Maybe you've had a little too much," Luke replied in a stumbly voice, his eyes almost closed.
Bobby patted Luke's thigh and started getting up. "Come on, I'll get you to bed, shortie," Bobby joked and Reggie watched as their rhythmic guitarist threw their lead singer over his shoulder in a totally undignified way and carried him in.
Reggie felt himself laughing to himself as he watched them go.
"Booze makes you quieter," Alex pointed once they were alone.
Reggie looked at him, expressionless, and shrugged. "I don't know. I don't think I'm drunk," Reggie said.
"How would you know?" Alex wondered.
"I bet I can be on all fours," Reggie replied.
Alex tried hard to keep a straight face. "I think you mean you can do a four standing," he said.
Reggie shrugged. "Is there a difference?"
"There's a big difference."
Reggie looked at Alex across the room and saw the color on the blond's cheeks and Reggie realized what he had actually said.
They broke into a big laugh at the same time.
"Oh, we’re having a good time here," Bobby chipped in, as he came back.
"Everything alright with the drunken pup upstairs?" Alex asked.
See? He always worried.
"Yeah, he fell face-first into the mattress when I put him down. I wasn't too keen on the idea of undressing him, though, so he's all yours," Bobby said to Alex, pointing with open arms to back inside the house.
Alex sipped on his beer. "Nope. I'm not interested in undressing Luke anymore," Alex said, with a shake of his head.
"Alright, boys, I'm off for the night," Bobby says, starting to say his goodbyes.
"Awesome night," Reggie muttered, staring at the sky.
Bobby eyed him, turning. "Are you okay— is he okay?"
Alex waved a hand. "Don't worry. I got him," he assured Bobby and then gave him a fist bump.
Reggie waved Bobby goodbye with a smile and continued to stare at the starry sky, listening to Alex sip his beer quietly.
It'd been barely a few minutes when Alex was getting up. "All right, let's go," he said, going over to Reggie to help him up.
Reggie didn't really think he needed the help, he just appreciated being held by Alex.
"It looks like we're dancing," Reggie said, amused, at Alex's shoulder.
"There's no music, though," Alex commented, but his grip was strong in Reggie's hips.
"I can sing if you want," Reggie said in an offer.
"I don't think—"
"I've gotta take a little time, a little time to think things over,” Reggie started singing offly, slowly, his cheek pressed on Alex’s shoulder. “I better read between the lines. In case I need it when I'm older—”
“That’s an interesting choice there,” Alex muttered, but Reggie noticed he didn’t let go.
“What makes you say that?” Reggie asked, stopping his singing, distracted.
Alex just moved one shoulder slightly. “I figured you would sing We Built This City or What’s Up. Hell, even Girls Wanna Have Fun,” he explained.
Reggie smiled against Alex’s shoulder. “I was in the mood for some Foreigner right now,” he muttered. “Plus, that way you can teach me so I won’t look stupid next time,” he added.
“You would have to be born again to not look stupid,” Alex shot and Reggie turned to give him an undignified look which only made Alex’s laugh rumble louder.
Reggie thought it was contagious.
But instead, he leaned back in and kept going: “Now this mountain I must climb. Feels like the world upon my shoulders.”
“Alright,” Alex whispered, shifting to grab Reggie’s right hand in his own, and started swaying them slowly.
Reggie gripped Alex’s hand tight and tried to keep his heart at bay when Alex pressed his hand on his lower back.
“This is how you hold her,” Alex explained in his ear.
“Mmmm, or him,” Reggie replied without second thought.
Alex’s feet stopped moving for a split second and Reggie felt him tilt his head next to him. “Or him, then,” he complied. In his tone, he seemed content.
Alex probably knew even before Reggie himself did.
Alex always knew things first than Reggie ever could.
The blond resumed their swaying, holding Reggie tight yet leaving enough room for them not to be pressed against each other. “What happened to my music?”
Reggie wet his lips and continued: “But through the clouds, I see love shine. It keeps me warm as life grows colder.”
“In my life, there's been heartache and pain,” Alex chipped in with him, their voices harmonizing effortlessly.
Reggie moves his head back to sing with him, big goofy smile on their faces. “I don't know if I can face it again. Can't stop now, I've traveled so far. To change this lonely life...” he sings with the drummer.
Then they get closer, grin untouched, and spin around slowly, their voices rising higher.
“I wanna know what love is, I want you to show me. I wanna feel what love is, I know you can show me… ”
Alex lets go off Reggie to twirl him around smoothly and Reggie tries to not trip back towards him but maybe the three beers on him did have an effect so he just crashes against Alex’s warm chest.
“Come on, Reginald ” Alex sighs with an eye roll but it has that mildly irritated yet sweet tone Alex uses nearly every time he says his name.
It’s the tone Reggie’s grown to like oh, so, so much.
So Reggie, like most times in his life, didn’t really think about it before he did it.
He only took one brief look at Alex’s face before he pushed himself just a little up, and pressed his lips against Alex’s, throwing his arms on the drummer’s shoulders.
Alex stilled his lips in a pout, stiff and unmoving, but Reggie didn’t cower just yet.
Kissing was, after all, the language he spoke the best.
So Reggie rolled his arms just a little down to put his hands around Alex’s long neck and he felt the little hairs behind Alex’s head bristle.
He sucked on Alex’s closed mouth just one more time as his hands moved across the blond’s cheeks, soothing, before he let go of him with a big inhale, just breathing in all of Alex’s scent to save for a rainy day.
If he was going to ruin their friendship forever, he might’ve as well make it worth it.
When he parted, Alex’s eyes were still closed, stunned.
“Why did you do that?” was, funny enough, Alex’s first words.
What Alex probably meant to say was ‘why are you so stupid that you’d do that?’.
And see, Reggie could get even stupidier when he wanted to.
Which is why he said, like it was obvious: “It’s what you do with the things you love.”
And there Reggie could see it, crystal clear as ever, the glint in Alex’s eyes that held exasperation and wonderstruck with equal measure where Reggie was concerned.
The look of frustrated devotion that promised Reggie that Alex still wouldn’t change a thing about him.
So, he wasn’t really surprised when Alex pulled him closer again to claim his own kiss, this time parting Reggie’s thin lips with his tongue and sucking the breath out of his very lungs, almost sending him to an early grave.
What he was surprised about was that for someone who refused their early years of practicing via playing spin the bottle, Alex was better than him at speaking the kissing language.
Fine, whatever, he was still young to keep learning.