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This wasn’t supposed to happen.
THIS WAS NOT HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.
Sure, as anyone would think, he was a little off that morning, maybe a /little/ peaky (shut up, Steven, shut up with the ‘looking like a ghost’ thing, I’m fine, shut the fuck up or I swear-), but he was fine. Everything was fine.
Only it most definitely wasn’t.
The crushing reality of the situation only hits him when he’s in the history classroom he shares with both Professor Madej and Sara and a ton of other people, in pain and desperately trying not to make a sound as his lecturer droned on about nothing, back against the wall as his head spins, hearing murmurs and laughing from below where he’d cornered himself the last few weeks.
God, he hated this. He hated all of this. It was his fault that he was here. He should have just left well alone and not pushed this whole thing out to what it had become.
If he hadn’t gotten so drunk at a frat party that rather biting fall last year, if he hadn’t stumbled into his lecturer’s office by accident while wandering the campus, if they hadn’t had sex with his suspender and glasses-wearing companion pounding his ass into the desk and then left it just at that be despite leaving being possibly the worst option ever given his current situation, he most likely wouldn’t be here, in the corner of the lecturer hall, hiding from everyone including his professor and crush like a fucking coward-
His train of thought suddenly got lost as he crumpled over his table that he thankfully shared with no one, tears pricking his eyes as pain flashed through him and his hand fell to his jersey hem, his overlarge stomach that was too unnoticeable to boot peeking out the lower part of the sweatshirt he’d worn underneath it as he cupped the appendage roughly, a shade of red only associated with fever burning bright against the pale colour of the lights and his cheeks.
It wasn’t like he hadn’t realized what was happening to him, only a few weeks or so after they all went their separate ways for the break. It was hard to ignore, as he had already started showing by the time he was 2 months along.
At first, he thought it was just a weight problem, that he’d been eating the wrong stuff and so had his parents, deciding with their pressing on going on a diet for the rest of that year, but the healthy eating and only every so often sweets just seemed to make the problem worse, his stomach steadily rounding out and increasing in size, worrying him as it started to extend past his belt and almost out to mid-thigh when the New Year came around.
Of course, his family, Jake and eventually himself just all put it down to ‘holiday weight’, everyone ate themselves silly around the end of the year, why wouldn’t Ryan be the same?
Plus, Ryan was a frat bro though and though. He was allowed to have a beer belly, that’s what college was for. (Though come to think of it, he hasn’t been drinking lately, the smell of alcohol, even rubbing alcohol, seems to make him want to hurl, guess his liver needed a break for a while to become useful again.)
Evidently, despite that earlier reasoning (Shane, hem, Professor Madej would be proud), that was not the case, as while the holidays ended, Ryan’s stomach stayed stubbornly round and just kept growing fast, the sudden weight that he was carrying seriously impending all of his normal activities at home while staying at his parent’s home.
It was the kicks that told him what was actually happening to him.
In the middle of the night at the end of January, the day before he was to return to his dorm he shared with a pair of roommates, Ryan been awoken by his ribs aching massively and in getting up (a daily and rather embarrassing struggle since about mid-November) felt a fist or a leg shoot out in protest at their space being cramped, startling him and making him fall heavily back on the bed, causing a sudden flurry of panicked movement, a feeling he could only compare to snakes slithering around on his insides.
Ever since then, it was all he could feel. Feet and fists fussing around inside of his body, only ever dying down for a few moments before starting again, even more restless than before.
He wanted to tell someone, his roommates? His parents? His brother? God he’d desperately wanted to, but couldn’t. What would he say? ‘Oh hi everyone, I just decided that I wanted to be stupid and throw away my academic career by having sex with my professor and getting knocked up?’ Yeah, no. Hell no.
So it figured that karma would come and bite him on the ass like a slap of cold water to the face when he looked at his schedule for his university classes and blanched seeing his first few weeks of uni life was devoted to mostly ‘Paragons of History’ with Professor Shane-fucking-Madej and he had nowhere to hide from the masses as he stumbled through the halls of campus, belly now too big to cleverly hide from anyone.
He was forced to host his friends and their jokes, endure the slaps and the grabbing and the teasing along with everyone’s attention who saw it straining against his shirt (“Woah, I didn’t know Santa Claus lived outside the North Pole!” “Fuck off and die, Andrew. It’s just a beer gut I worked up over Christmas! I’m slowly absorbing it!”), unable to look Shane in the eye in every class they had together, despite not forgetting the look thrown his way the first time he saw him after the break.
He most likely knew something was up, given his switching of seats as well, but he avoided talking to him like the plague, rushing both in and out of class as fast as he could in the cover of other students, even though it was obvious that Professor Madej wanted to talk to him alone without everyone there.
He didn’t want to be so cold, but this was too big for just talking amongst “fuckbuddies”.
Plus, he already had things to worry about as it was. Like this new person sitting on all his organs that felt like they weighed 100 tons lately and wouldn’t stop wriggling under his skin.
Now, on Friday before everyone went back to their respective apartments and dorms and homes either later that afternoon or tomorrow morning for the long weekend, almost a month and a half after the break had finished, he just had to be ill and in pain as he tried to figure out what to do next.
Having progressed from being against the wall to leaning against the table, hands pressing the solid polished wooden top while his stomach pressed heavily against it, Ryan couldn’t help but let out a whimper as white-hot pain licked his insides, waist, thighs and hips, his body shaking because of it. God, what was happening to him?
He would have mused on it more probably, until he heard someone clearing their throat, his breath leaving him in a quiet, tight gasp as he looked up to find the whole class staring at him, along with Professor Madej, who looked like he was about to pounce up the stairs, the hand gripping the projector shaking like it would break the thing in half. “Y-Yeah Professor?”
“Hey man, you okay?”
Fucking christ. Of course, he’s not! “Y-Yeah, dude. Totally fine. Just...not well. Thought you were going to teach us about Hades or something, this is Greek history right? Get to the good stuff! I was fallin’ asleep here!”
Professor Madej made a noise that shot straight through him before he spoke at the teasing, glasses perched on his nose as he watched him carefully.
As if he wasn’t sweating enough right now.
“Not well how? Are you alright? Do you need help? I can ask another student to fetch the nurse if you need to leave.”
If Ryan didn’t know this guy as well as he did, having been watching his every move since he started on campus 3 years ago and had spent multiple “opportunities” with him since last year (who was he kidding? They had more sexual tension between them than Steven and Andrew ever would have), he would have missed the tone of his voice that screamed out he had a hundred more questions to ask him. He couldn’t deal with that right now.
“No-no, I’ll be...I’ll be fine.” It was said through clenched teeth as pain flashed through him again, head and neck dipping so he could breathe while his hands attempted to hold onto the smooth surface beneath him. “I don’t need to go through the nurse, I’m heading home after this class anyway for the weekend. My folks will take care of me.”
There was a beat of silence and Ryan was worried that despite his lame-ass excuse, Professor Madej may still try and floor it up the stairs to check on him personally, but then there was a sigh before “Well, Mr Bergara, if you could pay attention, I would at least like you to learn something before you disappear, sick or not.”
“Trying to, bud.” He attempted to inject some type of reassurance in his tone, but it came out just like him, shaky and pained, as he watched Professor Madej turn back to his whiteboard and continue the lecture, one eye still obviously watching him.
Despite feeling like he could collapse at the top of a hat, he needed to make face and even as pain racked him from all sides, he hid it behind the excuse he gave Shane of him being ill as to sequester himself away into his corner to ‘learn’, only to wither in his seat quietly.
Soon enough, however, the class was over and everyone had packed up, cleaned up and either left or had stayed behind to talk to Professor Madej, leaving Ryan to his own devices for a quick moment as he paced laps around the top of the lecture hall, drenched in sweat and shaking.
The pain that had hit him earlier in the morning just before class had just gotten worse and despite getting up halfway through and easing the tightness he felt in his skin, he was forced to admit that his worst nightmare was coming true.
This baby was coming, sooner rather than later.
Moaning quietly, he was holed up in the shadows out of view, squatting against the far side of a table by the time everyone had deserted the place legs and body shivering as the now identified contraction left him in a rush.
He was about to steadily try and help himself up when he felt a hand against his back, as well as an arm assisting him in getting up, letting him plant his hands against the same table and lean heavily on it as he rolled his hips, trying to ease the tightness that was strangling them.
With his eyes closed, he didn’t know who was beside him and was just about to make an excuse, concluding it was Steven or Sara or one of his roommates that had been looking for him, when he felt the same hand against his neck, tangled in the bottom fo his hair.
Oh.
Eyes half-open, he swallowed before he made contact with shiny glasses and the panicked, but rather concerned eyes of the man that had put him in this situation. “H-Hey.”
“Hey.” He murmured back, both of them looking at each other before Professor Madej (Shane, god /Shane/) spoke again, sounding both nervous and desperate. “I know this is sudden, but do you have another class after this, Ryan? Cause I would really like to talk with you. As soon as possible.” He didn’t miss the way his eyes lowered to his stomach.
“I don’t know what you want me to say.” Ryan murmured breathlessly as he felt the pains starting to well up again in his back and winced. “Not like it’ll make anything- oh, fuck, not again-” He would have said more, but there wasn’t much he could do as the pain suddenly flared and while he meant to reach for the table, he found himself reaching out to Shane and gripping his shoulders heavily, despite being a lot taller than him, shuddering as this contraction seems to last an eternity, certainly longer than the last one he’d just gone through.
The pain wasn’t most of the problem, Ryan was discovering as he lent against Shane for dear life. It may have been part of the problem in the beginning, but the rest was the deep, burning, aching pressure that was pushing down harder and harder the more the contractions lasted.
His waters had yet to break (he may be a dumb frat boy, but he’d educated himself up enough for this shit), though he suspected that even when they did, this wouldn’t get any easier.
He didn’t know how long he had been in pain for before it slowly let him out of his clutches, tapering off and making him wheeze, a whine leaving him on accident that made him feel Shane’s arms tighten around his back. Shit, when had he- didn’t matter.
He tried to pull away as best he could, attempting to find some air before the next pain, but Shane suddenly gripped him tightly effectively trapping him. He doesn’t really know why (lying to himself of course), but he lets him hold him as he sways, groaning.
He can feel the muscles spamming again, but instead of complaining, he lets out a grunt, head buried somewhere in clothing now as he rides it out, exhausted and sore as he battled to get through it. He can feel /something/ moving down with each lick of pain in his body, stinging his insides, but not like he thought it would feel.
His stomach still feels overfull and heavy, not unlike a person about to drop a kid, but it’s just...more. There’s more to it and he just can’t explain it.
“Please, please god…” His knees were starting to shake from all the pacing and now standing, aching for the same relief as the rest of him did from the pressure weighing him down. “I just want it over. I need to...ugh!”
Finally, as his body gave out from exhaustion, he fell to his knees as Shane tried to hold him up, legs wide and hands in front of him, not unlike earlier when he was against the table.
“Shit!” Shane had stopped students starting to file in and left Ryan’s side quite quickly, only to wave his arms at them from above the stage. “Hey! Sorry guys, but class is cancelled! All classes are cancelled for today actually, as I have a family emergency to attend to. Feel free to go about your college lives!”
Thankfully, it worked and the students (while confused) dissipated quite quickly and Shane sprung into action as he fashioned a sign out of coping paper and sticky tape on the door, returning to find Ryan on his hands and knees, rocking to ease the pain just a little.
“Hey, hey, look at, look at me-” Shane pulled Ryan’s face int view, his heart breaking at the look of pain in his eyes. “We need to get you out of here. Do you think you can walk?”
“I...I don’t...I have no idea.” Ryan stuttered out, his limbs feeling like they were weighed down already. “I can try, but it’ll have to be quick.”
The slightly older man offered the younger a lift up and Ryan stumbled a little now back on his feet, everything feeling heavy and achy as he stood there to get his bearings. “What...what about my stuff?”
“I’ll see to it that someone locks this hall up for the weekend. I’m the only one that uses it other than maybe one or two others. Don’t worry about that right now.”
Shane’s voice was uncharacteristically gentle despite the worry laced into it, watching Ryan like a hawk as they slowly made their way down to the bottom steps of the room, his arm practically holding the shorter man up as they stopped for a moment to rest. “On a scale from one to ten, how bad is it?”
“It’s...ugh…” Ryan’s face crumbled again and his legs shook, feeling like he was going to collapse. He felt himself being pulled and he took advantage of it, shaky hands gripping the lapels of Shane’s coat as he rode it out before he let go slowly. “...bout’ a 7. It’s bad, but not like I wanna throw myself off a building bad.”
“You’re handling it pretty well.” Shane tried to smile, but it fell as he watched him, Ryan feeling the tension in the air. “How long have you known?”
“Not long...” Ryan admitted sheepishly, feeling like he wanted to shrivel up under Shane’s gaze. “About...uh...6 weeks or so? Thought it was just all the beer and Thanksgiving plus Christmas catching up with me.”
“Oh, Ryan…” Shane scolded in that gentle but firm way a teacher does to a small child and maybe in a different world, Ryan would have fought back, defending himself, but right now, it was not the time for fighting. “You could have-no, you /should/ have talked to me.”
“Just wanted to save you from getting fired.” Was all Ryan could squeak out before he hit the deck, or more accurately, lent on the doorframe as his whole body tensed, thankful the building the hall was housed in was pretty much deserted, given mostly everyone was in classes.
Shane said nothing in response, his brain having switched from talking to action, steadily helping Ryan from the hallway to the outside, which was obviously becoming slightly harder the more time passed considering Ryan was groaning quite loudly, his body having been folded over semi-permanently by the time they managed to exit the building.
Before they could go further, however, Ryan’s legs gave out and he whined, sinking to a kneeling position as the pressure became unbearable, his LA Lakers jersey looking like it would burst open thanks to his stomach pulling it so tightly.
“Shit, Ryan!” Shane caught him before he could injure himself and slowly helped him lower himself into a hands and knees position again, large hand trembling slightly against his spine as he watched the younger man shake. “Hold on, just for a minute.” Thanking his lucky stars that he had parked nearby the building (as his office was only in the next one over at admin), he quickly unlocked his older model car and gently pulled Ryan to his feet, the younger man’s shaking having gotten worse as Shane lowered him into the car as carefully as he could.
Before he could move to the driver’s side however, Ryan let out a gasp, grabbing his wrist and his glasses almost fell off his skull seeing a fuckton of clear fluid suddenly pour down his seat and out onto the parking lot asphalt, leaving Ryan moaning lowly as he came to a heart-stopping conclusion.
They weren’t making it out of this campus in time.
Working quickly, Shane opened the back door and stripped off his jacket, throwing it over the window, throwing his belongings towards the other side of the car to also block the view from the other window as best he could, before picking Ryan up and shuffling him to the back as best he could, who withered in pain as soon as he was set down.
“Ryan, listen to me-” Shane tried gently, a hand on his thigh as Ryan fought through the current pain that racked his body. “-I need to check how dilated you are, you’re in too much pain for someone just starting labor. Did you have any pain last night or yesterday at all?”
Ryan attempted to rack his brain despite the panic raging through his senses, but couldn’t come up with anything definite, shaking his head. “I can’t...Shane, I can’t have this kid here!”
“You might not have a choice right now, babe.” Shane hesitantly brought his hand up to hold Ryan’s, both of their hands now on his stomach, which tightened under their hands as Shane looked back into Ryan’s now tear-filled eyes. “You can do this. I know you can.”
A few tears leaked out of Ryan’s eyes, but eventually, he just managed to nod as Shane set about taking off his now dripping wet shorts, almost watching in fascinated horror as Ryan’s body is already doing something because the exit from his body that has suddenly appeared in Shane’s vision looks aflame and distended, like it’s opening up, but rather slowly.
In the next blink, he sees a flash of black hair before the hole closes over again and it takes all his willpower not to jump forward and hold Ryan’s hand because HOLY SHIT.
Above him, Ryan lets out a sharp cry through gritted teeth at the action, causing Shane to snap out of it and hold one of Ryan’s legs apart before he can even try and close them together. “Ryan, it’s right there! Gimme a push. okay? Can you do that? Push really hard.”
The words, while terrifying, rally Ryan to ‘get in the game’ as any basketballer would say and he bore down, chin almost touching the mountainous top of his heaving belly as he did so, a few tears finally leaving his eyes. “This sucks!”
“I know, I know it does, but keep going.” Shane doesn’t know if the sight of Ryan’s red and swollen exit twisting open again is what’s making him feel ill or if it’s the nerves cascading though his whole body at what is happening right now, but he has little time to care about it as the same bit of black hair he’d seen earlier suddenly turned into a whole head, the curve pushing through with an agonizingly slow slide before Ryan suddenly jerked with a yell, the baby’s head shooting out with a gush of fluid behind it as it left the confines of the younger man’s currently laboring body.
He’s barely able to collect himself before he watches very muscle in Ryan’s entire body tighten, from his face down to his toes, curling in agony as he continues pushing, the baby twisting and leaving him suddenly within 2 rather short pushes and falling directly into Shane’s suddenly still arms, both in shock.
“Oh shit.” At first, he had wanted to comfort Ryan, given he had possibly done what Shane had thought for the longest time to be impossible, but he notices quite quickly that the baby isn’t doing much of anything. It’s kind of floppy and covered in blood. It’s not /crying/.
Unable to find anything immediate around him and with Ryan’s panicked eyes focused on him intently, he throws caution to hell and swipes his jacket down, using it to rub the infant warm and stimulate it to start crying. It feels like minutes had passed, when in reality it was most likely only seconds when suddenly, the baby takes an unpracticed breath and lets out such a shrill cry that it startles both of them.
Neither says anything at first, but suddenly Ryan, the panting, sweaty mess he is, gives an insane laugh, tears flooding down his cheeks as Shane joins him, the fussing baby still wrapped in Shane’s now ruined jacket laid on his chest in a heartbeat, the latter’s arms shooting up despite her shaking to cradle the newborn gently as their cries died down.
Tracing his fingers over the little one’s inky hair, Shane took in every detail that he could see, knowing Ryan was most likely doing the same after that whole ordeal.
The baby is calm, sleepy even, seemingly unaffected by the events that only transported moments ago, their tiny hands each with five fingers gripping the collar of Ryan’s long sweatshirt, wrinkly feet poking out of the bottom of the jacket, tiny and pink like the rest of it.
“Oh Ryan, how did you do this ?” Shane’s words are soft, his whole brain floored as he watches the little one rest against his partner’s chest, his own tears prickling behind his eyelids. “How in the hell did you manage this ?”
“I don’t even know, I-” Ryan can’t really say much, speechless and feeling a little lightheaded as the instant connection to his baby fills him to the core, only able to lavish the tiny hand that’s near his face with a litany of gentle kisses. “They’re perfect.”
“Yeah.” Shane’s breathless, but soon manages to get some of his brain rebooted to working status, shaking his head still in disbelief as he taps its nose. “You need a name, little one.”
“Christ, we didn’t even look to see what they are!” Shifting gently, Ryan shakily raised a trembling hand and lifted the left side of Shane’s makeshift jacket swaddle and chuckled at what he saw. “It’s a girl. Sorry, little lady. I thought for sure you were a boy.”
“Would you look at that? Hello little girl, welcome to the world.” Shane also chuckled, beaming face turning to Ryan. “She’s beautiful Ryan, stunning. You did so well.”
“Thanks.” He knew they had a hell of a lot more to talk about in the interim that they were avoiding, but right now, he was content to just lie there in the backseat of his Professor’s (lover’s) car with their baby while Shane called the emergency services to the college to collect them, looking over her like she would disappear.
Hopefully, his folks would understand when he rang home later that afternoon to say that he’d be bringing two extra people home with him from college to meet them.