Chapter 1: The "L" Word (Part One)
Chapter Text
once again love drives me on, that loosener of limbs, bittersweet creature against which nothing can be done
-Sappho
*** *** ***
Eileen Fitzherbert, with her hair now long enough to pull back into a tight ponytail, took a long swig of her water canteen, draining it. She peeked inside it, frowning when she saw only a few more droplets clinging stubbornly to the side.
“Damn.” She muttered. The wagon lurched, and she nearly tumbled off from her seated position on top. “Watch your driving!” She called down to Cassandra. “I nearly fell off!”
“I’ll have to try harder next time.” Cassandra said, flicking the reins gently. Fidella and Maximus picked up their speed slightly, and Eileen nearly plummeted.
“Oh, you’re hilarious.” Eileen said.
“Ooh ooh!” An excited voice called out, and a blonde princess burst out of the wagon, practically vibrating with excitement. “Eileen, Cassandra, look at the size of these sunflowers!” Rapunzel smiled, gently touching one of the petals of the proud flowers on the side of the road.
“They’re very nice,” Eileen agreed. “Do you see a stream anywhere? I’m out of water.”
“I’ve got to paint these.” Rapunzel said, dashing back into the wagon and emerging with an armful of art supplies.
“Don’t run off again!” Eileen said quickly.
“I’m not!” Rapunzel said, climbing up on top of the wagon next to her and setting her supplies up. “Aren’t you excited?! It’s like a whole new chapter of our lives is starting!” She smiled widely, looking at the trail of pointed black rocks. “Aren’t you excited to see where these rocks are taking us?”
“Yes, I’m so very excited to follow a bunch of creepy rocks,” Eileen said, smiling when Rapunzel nudged her. “But yes, the road trip is very exciting.”
“Try to exercise at least some caution, Rapunzel,” Cassandra said, glancing back at them. “We don’t want a repeat of the bear incident.”
Rapunzel sighed. “I really thought he wanted to be friends.”
“I promised your dad I’d keep you safe,” Cassandra said. “Not that I don’t think you can handle yourself. Just that the real world isn’t all fun and games.”
“Next stop, Vardaros!” Lance said, sticking his head out the top of the wagon. “The city of fun and games!”
Cassandra groaned.
“Hell yeah,” Eileen grinned, looking at Rapunzel. “You’re gonna love it, it’s like a never ending party.”
“Not that you shouldn’t trust the endorsement of ex-criminals,” Cassandra said. “But I just want to make sure we aren’t losing track of why we’re here.”
“I know, I know,” Rapunzel said, retrieving the ripped scroll, examining the art and writing. “I want answers more than anyone.”
Eileen pursed her lips, shaking her canteen. “We still have water in the wagon, right?” Rapunzel nodded in response.
“Move your head, Lance, I’m coming in.” Eileen said.
Lance disappeared back into the wagon, and Eileen hopped down inside. “Christ, I’m starving. Do we have anything sweet in here?”
“So,” Lance said, ignoring her question. “Vardaros.”
“Yep,” Eileen agreed, glancing back at him. “What of it?”
“Home of Marie.” Lance said, voice teasing.
Eileen felt her face grow red, remembering the old girlfriend. “She’s a traveler, she’s not there anymore.”
“That was an awkward run-in.” Lance chuckled.
“For you,” Eileen said, face growing more red at the memory of Lance walking in on them. “I thought I was fucked.”
“Well, it all turned out alright, didn’t it?” Lance said.
“More or less.” Eileen said, filling her canteen from the barrel they had outfitted as a water tap.
Lance was quiet for another moment. “You know…” He said. “You could tell them.”
Eileen laughed.
“I’m serious,” Lance said. “They’re our friends.”
“They’re our friends-my friends-because they don’t know,” Eileen said. “So it’s crickets from you, buddy.”
“I wasn’t going to say anything. You know that.” Lance said.
“I know, I know,” Eileen sighed. “The thought still freaks me out a little, though.”
“Seriously, Eileen,” Lance said. “They care about you. Even Cass. They wouldn’t care.”
“We-” Eileen scowled, feeling uncomfortable. “We don’t know that. I don’t know that.”
The wagon stuttered to a stop. “Fidella and Max are taking a break!” Cassandra called to them. “You guys need anything?”
“We’re fine!” Eileen shouted back, and sighed deeply.
Lance sat down, regarding her with a strange exhaustion. “Look, I know you like Rapunzel-” He held up his hand when she opened her mouth to argue. “-don’t argue, you’re not that discreet, and I’m not saying you have to tell her that. I’m just saying she cares about you, and wouldn’t want you to be hiding.”
“What the hell would I even say?!” Eileen asked. She paused, thinking for a moment she heard someone outside the entrance to the wagon. But she couldn’t hear anything else, and shrugged it off.
“How do I even start that conversation?” She asked. “‘Hey guys,’” She gestured dramatically, false cheer in her voice. “‘What’s for dinner? Fish? Oh, good, I’ll get the fire started. By the way, I’m a lesbian!’” She spat the word out. It left a bitter taste in her mouth.
The door fell open, and Rapunzel tumbled in the room.
For a second, the event didn’t quite compute with Eileen, and she was frozen in her sarcastic smile.
Then the weight of the situation dawned on her, and she felt all the blood drain from her face, and her stomach twisted in the same way it used to when she was caught thieving. Except now there was much, much more at stake than a night in a prison cell.
Rapunzel looked surprised, and giggled guiltily. “Oh...flimsy doors.” She said.
There was a shriek from outside the wagon, and it snapped Eileen out of her stupor, giving her something else to focus on. She jumped out of the wagon, ready to fight. Rapunzel and Lance followed.
“Cass!” Rapunzel cried. “Are you alright?! We heard a scream!”
“That wasn’t me.” Cassandra said, and turned around, holding something out.
“Shorty?” Eileen asked.
The tiny drunk shrieked again, held out by the back of his shirt by Cassandra. He had crumbs in his beard.
“Found him in the food trunk.” Cassandra said.
“What?!” Lance gasped, rushing forward to look in the now empty food trunk. “How did you eat everything?! You monster!”
Shorty burped.
“We need food!” Eileen said, hating how pitchy her voice was. “Lance and I will go into town! Right now! To get food!”
“We can come-” Cassandra said, looking at Eileen strangely, but Eileen was looking everywhere but Rapunzel.
“No no! It’s fine!” She grabbed Lance’s arm, dragging him away. “You kids have fun! Be back soon!”
As soon as they were out of sight of the wagon, Eileen keeled over and threw up.
“That was...okay, I’ll admit it, that wasn’t ideal.” Lance said.
“Oh my God,” Eileen rasped. “Oh my God, I...oh no.”
She forced herself to her feet, grabbing her head. “I’m fucked,” She whispered. “I’m so fucked, I’m completely fucked. I’m so fucked it’s almost funny, oh my God-”
“Stop saying you’re fucked.” Lance said.
“But I am!” Eileen said.
“She didn’t have a bad reaction.” Lance said.
“Because she didn’t have time to have one! We had to make sure Cassandra wasn’t dying!” Eileen said, pacing. She felt dizzy, and she couldn’t seem to get enough air. “We need to leave, right now. Well, no, I need to leave. I...I gotta run, right now-”
“Eileen,” Lance said, grabbing her shoulders. “You’re panicking.”
“I am not!” Eileen said, her voice shrill.
“You’re panicking,” Lance said again. “And that won’t do anything. Look, how about this. Let’s go into Vardaros, get the food, and come back. Then we can decide what to do. But you’re going to do something stupid if you act right now.”
“I can’t go back.” Eileen whimpered.
“Then let’s just go to Vardaros, calm down, and plan our next move. No bolting. Okay?” Lance said.
Eileen nodded her head frantically. “O-okay. Okay, fine.”
“No bolting.” Lance said.
“No bolting.”
“Promise?”
“I said I wouldn’t, Christ.”
“Because you look like you’re about to bolt.”
“Let me go, I’m going to puke.”
*** *** ***
“This is nothing like I remember.” Eileen said, marginally calmer.
The city of Vardaros, once bright, vibrant and impossibly loud, was now dull and dead. People milled about, but ducked their heads low as if worried they might be recognized.
Lance frowned. “This is disappointing.”
She sighed, trying to dispel the knot in her stomach that refused to leave. “Let’s just find something to eat.”
They wandered the streets, but food vendors seemed few and far in between. It was far more likely to see someone selling knives. She heard sharp whispers, and she knew it was her imagination, but it felt like every single one of them was directed at her.
“...what am I gonna do?” Eileen moaned, suddenly dizzy and nauseous at the thought of going back.
“Look,” Lance said. “I really don’t think the princess is gonna be mad at you about this. And also, working yourself up to the point where you puke again isn’t gonna help anyone.”
“Hey, I haven’t puked in at least fifteen minutes,” She jerked her head back at the sound of another whisper. “Did you hear that? Sounded like they said ‘Flynn Rider’.”
“Okay, now you’re just being paranoid.” Lance sighed.
“It’s not paranoia if someone’s out to get you.” She said darkly.
“No one is-alright,” Lance sighed and pinched his brow. “Look, whatever happens, it’s gonna happen. There’s no point in stressing yourself out over something you can’t control. And whatever happens, I’ll be there with you. Okay?”
Eileen forced herself to take a deep breath. “...okay,” She said, and glanced at him. “Thanks.”
“Hey!” She glanced up, seeing a teenage girl with pigtails and a deep scowl. “You’re friends with that girl with long hair?”
Eileen stepped back, nervous. “What of it?”
The girl made a face. “You better come with me, she’s in trouble!”
Eileen’s heart skipped a beat, and she glanced up at Lance before taking off after the girl, her stomach knotting even more. Not wanting to talk to Rapunzel was different from leaving her to whatever trouble had found her.
She followed the girl into an alley, but the girl was leaning leisurely on some crates, looking pleased. “Where is she?!” Eileen demanded.
“How should I know?” The girl tossed a small bag between her hands, and it clinked. She pushed past Eileen with a smile. “Some guy gave me this cash to tell you that.”
“Shit.” Eileen said, looking around wildly.
“Rider,” A horribly familiar voice said, and Eileen whirled around to see the Weasel emerge from the shadows, smiling widely. “Long time, no see.”
“Anthony the Weasel!” Eileen said, grinning back. “I knew it was you, we must be downwind.” She took a step back, but someone grabbed her arm. A huge thug grinned down at her stupidly, and Eileen swallowed hard.
She looked at Lance, who was also held tightly. “Someone wants to do some catching up with you.” The Weasel said.
“Great,” Eileen muttered. “Just great.”
*** *** ***
At the edge of town, there was a marble mansion.
A lion’s mouth opened at the entrance, with a perfectly cut green lawn at the front, surrounded by a quaint fountain. Boring, perfectly cut bushes lined the edges, and not a single leaf was out of place from them. The fountain spat water, as if struggling to remember its purpose, and a few swans floated in it serenely.
The only thing out of place was a single black rock, pushing through the surface defiantly.
Eileen was shoved forward, and her knees collided roughly on the marble steps. Her arms were tied tightly together, and her hands trussed behind her back. Lance was shoved next to her. “Do you have a plan?” He whispered.
“Working on one,” She whispered back. “Any ideas?”
Lance shook his head.
Someone exited the mansion, and Eileen looked up. She instantly felt sick.
A bear of a man walked out, dressed in a fancy blue suit that probably cost more than Rapunzel’s last birthday party. He had small, darting eyes, and long blonde hair and a full beard.
“Shit,” Eileen muttered to herself. “God, motherfucker-Baron!” She called out, forcing herself to smile good-naturedly. “Long time, no see!”
The Baron sat on a chair in front of them, regarding her and Lance with a strange interest. “Glad to see you’ve set up shop in Varados,” Eileen continued, babbling a bit. “Great city, right? Love what you’ve done with the place-”
“Shut up.” The Weasel said, grabbing her by the front of her shirt and pulling his fist back. Eileen refused to flinch away.
“Enough.” The Baron said, voice rumbling. The Weasel dropped her and stepped away.
“Quit playing games, Rider,” The Baron said. “I’ve been waiting for this moment.”
He folded his hands. “It’s time to make amends.”
“Amends.” Eileen repeated, a bit confused.
“For what you did to my Stalyan.” The Baron said.
“O-oh,” Eileen said. “Right, that…we should, you know, I really think we should let that go. I mean, it’s basically ancient history. We should all just move on.”
“Let’s not.” A familiar voice said, and Eileen clammed up, a spike of terror running through her that was as tangible as a blow.
She turned.
A man stood behind her, his hair an odd mix between auburn and red, piercing blue eyes staring at Eileen with an expression she didn’t want to decode. Nausea came back tenfold, and she prayed she wouldn’t throw up in front of them.
“Stalyan!” Lance said immediately, wriggling to face him. “It’s been a while!”
Eileen knew immediately what he was doing; talking big and loud to detract attention from her. She was grateful, and then she hated herself for being grateful because now Lance could get hurt-
“Hello, Rider.” Stalyan said, passing by her and touching her cheek gently. Eileen flinched away from the touch, and then cursed herself for it.
Stalyan stood beside his father, a cruel smile on his face.
“Before you get too upset,” Eileen said, proud of how steady her voice was. “I can explain.”
“Oh, I’m not upset, Rider,” Stalyan said. “Besides, what’s there to explain? You left me at the altar.”
“Did I?” Eileen asked, feeling dizzy. “I mean, it’s just so long ago, honestly it’s all a little fuzzy and frankly, I can’t remember the details of what exactly went down-”
“Shut up.” Stalyan said, and Eileen’s mouth instantly closed. Her heart hammered, because suddenly she was a teenager again, terrified of her boyfriend and what it meant for her because if she left, awful, awful things would happen. But awful things were already happening. And still did.
Stalyan approached Eileen, and she had to force herself not to lean away. “After what you did, I swore if I ever saw you again, I’d kill you where you stood,” He towered over Eileen, and she stared back at him, hoping her fear wasn’t obvious. “But time comes with perspective.”
He smiled, kneeling down to her level. “And I realized we were meant for each other, Flynn Rider. Partners in crime. Partners in life,” He pushed some of Eileen’s hair aside gently, and she clenched her teeth, willing herself not to spiral. “We can’t change who we are.”
“What...what are you talking about?” Eileen asked, though she was afraid of the answer.
“I’m making you a proposition, Rider,” The Baron said. “Keep the promise you made to my son, and marry him.”
“Oh,” Eileen said. “Ah, well…”
“I really think that ship has sailed,” Lance spoke up, edging closer to Eileen. “Why don’t we all just...let it go? Move on? I’m sure there’s plenty of criminal ladies for Stalyan out there.”
“I’d really rather not...get married,” Eileen said weakly. “Thanks.”
The Baron chuckled. “It’s that, or your friends perish. Starting with Strongbow, and then we’ll work our way up to that lovely wagon of yours.”
“How do you know about-” Eileen paused when the Baron’s ring popped open, and a little black spider crawled out.
“Eileen, that’s a spider,” Lance whispered fervently. “He’s got a spider!”
“I can see that!” Eileen hissed.
“Not just any spider,” The Baron said fondly, watching the arachnid scuttle around on his hand. “The venomous Kai spider. It’s bite causes fever and delirium.”
He started stepping down the stairs. “Only when there’s swelling of the tongue and throat do you know the end is near.”
“Wait, hang on-” Eileen said, but the Baron dropped the spider on Lance.
Lance thrashed, panicked. “Oh my God oh my God oh my God-ow!” Lance slumped over on Eileen.
“Lance?!” She asked, panicked. She thrashed frantically, but only succeeded in giving herself rope burn. “Oh my God, you fucking killed him!”
“He passed out from fear,” The Baron said blandly. “But he will be dead by nightfall unless you have this.” He pulled out a small vial filled with orange liquid that hung around a chain on his throat.
“The anti-venom,” He said, and stuffed it back into his shirt. “Marry Stalyan, and this will be your wedding present from me. If not, Strongbow will only be the first of many casualties in your name.”
Eileen felt Stalyan’s hand fall on her shoulder, and this time she did flinch. Stalyan laughed. “Trust me, Rider.” He said.
“It’s meant to be.”
Chapter 2: The "L" Word (Part Two)
Notes:
oh i forgot to mention someone made this fantastic playlist for the series! give it a listen!!!!
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4qOEO87UWd1Q3rG2paqYwo?si=qSx8spP0TbaQPLlWwxUduQ
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Eileen did a lot of stupid things when she had been younger.
But by far the stupidest thing she had ever done was get together with Stalyan.
She had been somewhere between fourteen and fifteen, freshly kicked out of the orphanage with nothing much other than a new name and Lance. Stalyan had been...kind at first. He had helped her steal her earring, and had teased her good-naturedly when she chickened out and only got one. He let her stay in his father’s mansion and she didn’t have to worry about where she would spend the night or get her next meal. He was a good talker, good at compliments and deflection, and good at convincing her that his newest heist wasn’t incredibly foolhardy.
She had been happy to lie to herself, and fine to ignore Lance’s warnings and Stalyan’s tight hands, passing it off as Lance’s overprotectiveness and her own imagination. She had been fine to pretend for longer than she should have been.
It was really only when she realized her own emotions and preferences did she notice the warning signs.
The tight grip, the snapping, the sidelong comments and vague threats and of course I never said that, sweetheart, you know me better than that! suddenly became scarier. Stalyan was unpredictable, perfect and encouraging one day and a hurricane the next. She pulled back, stupidly hoping that if she distanced herself enough he would let her leave. In response, his grip grew tighter, and his talk of his father’s influence and reach grew louder and more pointed.
And then there was The Fight.
She didn’t remember what started it. It didn’t matter, but it spiraled out of control, and ended when Eileen declared in a moment of strength that she was leaving and never coming back.
Stalyan yelled that she would never leave and she was mine, dammit, you stupid whore, don’t you appreciate everything I’ve done for you?!
She had turned back to yell at him one last time, but that was when he had the sword.
A week later after fighting for her life, barely healed, she returned because Anthony the Weasel had muttered something about needing to come back before the Baron became too impatient, and she hadn’t had anywhere else to go anyway. Lance had to help her walk because it was too difficult to balance on her own. The doctor he had managed to get her to had said it was a miracle she wasn’t dead.
Stalyan didn’t even mention the stained bandages or the sword that still seemed crimson. He didn’t mention the fear she had now, flinching every time he moved too fast, and he certainly didn’t mention the hate Lance looked at him with now.
Eileen had wobbled through the door, and when Stalyan saw her, he proposed.
Eileen accepted, pretending not to notice how Lance’s grip on her shoulder tightened. She remembered she had wished the sword had killed her.
And the morning of the wedding, she ran.
That was one of the only things she knew she ever did right during her past.
And yet here she was, standing behind a ragged curtain, waiting while the Baron announced his plans to the citizens to ravage Vardaros for money in “celebration” of the marriage, and she stood dead still, waiting to be paraded like some kind of trophy kill.
All that running and pain, just to end back up where she started. It was ironic, and nearly funny.
She glanced to her side, her heart twisting painfully when she saw Lance slumped against the wall, wheezing slightly, his skin an unnatural pallor and covered in green, pus-filled sores. “Hang in there, buddy,” She whispered, mostly to herself. “I’ll get you out of this.
“Wow!” Stalyan said, peeking out from behind the curtain. “Look at all those people! I know you don’t like crowds, but you’ve got to admit, this is pretty sweet.”
“Stalyan, please,” Eileen said. “You’ve got to stop this. It’s stupid.”
He sighed. “I know. I told my dad the spider was unnecessary, but you know us. We’ve got a flair for drama.”
“That’s not what I meant.” Eileen said.
Stalyan smiled. “I know what you meant.”
“You know I can’t do this,” She said, feeling desperate. “I...I don’t love you. I don’t think I ever really did.”
Stalyan shrugged, as though this were a minor inconvenience. “You managed well enough before,” He sighed once more. “I’ll level with you, Flynn. We’ve all heard the story about the princess. How you rescued her from the tower, returned the crown, yada yada yada. But be honest,” He smiled. “Do you really belong in that life? In that lie?”
Eileen winced, and Stalyan laughed. “You’re a runner, sweetheart, and a damn good one, but I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I’ll always find you. We’re meant to be. It’s destiny.”
“Not much of a destiny.” Eileen said before she could stop herself, and then winced, hoping Stalyan wouldn’t turn on her.
But he was in a good mood, as he laughed. “Ah, well, we can’t all be sidekicks to a princess.”
“I am pleased to announce the re-engagement of my son,” The Baron said, his voice echoing. “Stalyan.”
Stalyan smiled at Eileen. “Showtime.” He ducked out, and Eileen heard weak, forced cheers.
“And his fiancee,” The Baron continued. “Flynn Rider.”
Eileen took a breath, trying to put on a neutral face that didn’t betray the knot in her stomach. She forced herself to step out, refusing to meet anyone’s eyes in the crowd, lest she break down and try to bolt. She couldn’t leave Lance behind.
You’re a runner, sweetheart, and a damn good one.
“Eileen!” Eileen stepped back, surprised at her name, and to her horror, saw Rapunzel standing right in front of the stage, distraught.
Eileen opened her mouth, but nothing came out. She felt the world spiraling, and nearly swayed from sudden vertigo, as though she were actually falling.
“Eileen, I...don’t understand.” Rapunzel said, and Eileen couldn’t make herself meet her eyes. She didn’t want to know what Rapunzel was thinking. It was probably nothing good. “What’s going on?”
Stalyan put his hand on her shoulder, and the dizziness worsened. She probably would have collapsed had it not been for Stalyan. Was that why he grabbed her? “She’s with us now.” He said, a victorious sneer in his voice.
“This...this is a joke, right?” Rapunzel asked, her voice horribly small.
Eileen heard something rustle behind her, and glanced back to see a guard pull aside the curtain, just enough so Eileen had a perfect view of Lance, who somehow looked worse in the five minutes she hadn’t been paying attention.
She bit her lip, and dug her fingernails into her palms hard enough to hurt.
“I’m sorry.” She managed to say, staring at the ground.
She let Stalyan lead her away, ignoring Rapunzel shouting after her.
*** *** ***
Eileen couldn’t remember the last time she cried.
She was quite proud with how in control she was of her emotions, at least when it came to expressing them outwardly. She could grin and chatter when she was inwardly panicking, pull off confident and suave when she was grieving, and act dangerous and threatening when she knew full well she could never win a fight.
But now, staring at herself in a decadent, obnoxiously expensive wedding dress, she was fighting a losing battle with emotions.
Everytime she thought she had put a lid on her tears, she would look at herself in the mirror of the changing room they had stuck her in, and feel her eyes water dangerously, and a painful lump burning in her throat. She would not cry, especially not in front of Stalyan and the Baron.
The door opened, and a tall guard stepped in. “You done?” He asked.
“You could’ve knocked,” She said, disguising the wobble in her voice with bitterness. “But yeah. I’m done.”
Eileen was disappointed-but not surprised-when the guard led her to a dungeon, shoving her inside. She felt a little bit of relief when she saw Lance slumped against the wall, but he looked so, so much worse, and his wheezing echoed in the stone cell.
“Oh my God,” She said softly, feeling the lump appear again. “Lance...just hang in there, okay? Just a bit longer. I promise, I’ll fix this.”
“It’s the right thing to do, you know,” Someone said, and Eileen looked up to see Stalyan leaning easily against the wall, smiling. “Getting hitched.” His smile widened. “You look beautiful.”
She recoiled at his complement, and Stalyan laughed.
“You need to call this off, please,” Eileen said, grabbing the cell bars. “Give me the antidote, I’m begging you!”
“You know what I was thinking about earlier?” Stalyan asked, as if he hadn’t heard her. “Our trip to Pincosta. Remember you said stealing the sultan’s jewels was a horrible idea, but I made you go through with it, and we made a fortune that day.” He smiled widely, nostalgia written all over his face.
“If I recall,” Eileen said. “We were also nearly killed brutally. Several times. And almost burned alive.”
“All part of the fun,” Stalyan shrugged. “My point is, I know what’s best for you. I always have.”
He approached the cell door suddenly, and Eileen stumbled back, tripping over the dress train. Stalyan laughed. “I know in my heart that this is where you belong, Flynn. What you deserve,” He said. “And I think you know it too.”
Eileen was quiet, not trusting herself to speak, head spinning.
“Well,” Stalyan said. “I suppose I ought to leave you to it. They say it’s bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding, but I’ve never been much for tradition. Although I hardly think we should tempt fate anymore than we already have.” He nodded at Lance with a sick smile, and stepped away.
“I’ll see you soon, sweetheart.” He said, and revulsion curled in Eileen’s stomach at the pet name. The dungeon door slammed loudly on his way out, oddly reminding her of the jerk of a hangman’s noose.
Lance coughed after he left, his bloodshot eyes cracking open. “Eileen?” He asked in a raspy, slurred voice. “Why’re you wearing a dress?”
Eileen forced herself to her feet, going over to Lance and kneeling next to him. “Lance, oh God...are you alright?!”
“Why the dress?” He repeated.
Eileen forced herself to smile, her vision suddenly blurry. “I’m getting married, apparently.”
Lance looked skeptical. “To who?”
“Stalyan.”
Lance scowled. “You hate him. He sucks.”
“Yeah, but I’m fine,” Eileen said, trying to dispel the quaver in her voice. “I’ll be alright.”
“Hm.” Lance said, not seeming to believe her.
“I will,” She assured him. “And you’ll be fine too. You probably won’t even remember all this. You can go back to the others-” Her voice hitched, and she had to take a breath. “And everyone will be okay.”
“But you’ll be here.” Lance said.
Eileen smiled widely, and she prayed that Lance couldn’t see the tears welling up in her eyes. “What’d I tell you? You don’t need to worry about me. I’m tough.”
Lance looked at her, unsure and eyes unfocused. “You sure?” He asked.
“Positive.” Eileen said.
Lance was quiet, and then closed his eyes, his wheezing now irregular.
Eileen hadn’t cried when Stalyan had split her skull. She hadn’t cried when Lance found her with Marie. She hadn’t cried when Lance was arrested and she found herself utterly alone. She hadn’t cried when she had been dragged to the gallows, and she didn’t cry when Gothel stabbed her and she died.
But now, alone except for her dying friend, one of the neat little jars filled with ugly emotions cracked under the pressure.
Eileen dropped her head and sobbed.
*** *** ***
An escort of two armed guards to the wedding itself wasn’t very romantic, but to be fair, Eileen hadn’t really been feeling any magic before.
They nudged her forward, and Eileen winced when she heard an out-of-tune version of ‘Here Comes the Bride’. The guests didn’t seem like they were having a particularly good time, and for some reason, it made Eileen feel slightly better. They were all miserable together.
Stalyan stood at the altar, smiling widely, and Eileen refused to look at him, marching down the aisle as though marching to the gallows. She might as well have been doing so. She would have preferred gallows, maybe.
She made it to the end, biting her tongue. “Let’s get on with it, shall we?” The Baron asked.
Eileen caught Stalyan’s eye and grit her teeth. He grinned, victorious.
“Funny!” A familiar voice from the crowd called out, and Eileen whirled around, barely daring to hope for such good luck.
Someone in a thick coat covered in bones threw off their hat, and there was Rapunzel, looking fearlessly at the Baron. “I was just thinking the same thing!”
Cassandra stood beside her, sword drawn.
“Rapunzel!” Eileen said before she could stop herself. She saw Stalyan scowl, and her heart stopped. “You shouldn’t be here!”
“Yeah, move along.” Stalyan said, waving at the guards. They drew their swords, and it took everything Eileen had in her not to lunge for Stalyan. He’d kill her for it, and then everyone else.
“Cass, hold on to something,” Rapunzel said, undoing her hair and striding up to a black rock. “It’s about to get rough in here!”
She grabbed the rock, and Eileen stumbled back, preparing herself to run if the rocks approached her-
Nothing happened.
Rapunzel coughed. “Rough in here!” She repeated, pushing her hair to the rock. Still nothing.
“That…” Rapunzel looked embarrassed. “Played out differently in my head.”
“Get them!” Stalyan said.
“No!” Eileen lurched forward, but a guard grabbed her arm. “Leave them alone!”
“Tick tick, Rider.” The Baron said, and the guard pushed her to show her Lance, partially hidden by the decorations and a swan statue.
He wasn’t moving.
“Guys!” Eileen shouted, panicked. “They poisoned Lance!”
Rapunzel’s eyes widened in realization, and the guards surrounded her and Cassandra. “Okay, Raps,” Cassandra said, sword drawn. “If you have a plan B, now would be a great time to pitch it.”
“He’s got the antidote!” Eileen shouted, looking at the Baron. The Baron merely smiled, pulling out the chain to taunt her.
“Good luck getting it now.” He said, and her stomach twisted painfully.
Rapunzel whistled, blocking a sword with her frying pan. Maximus burst into the reception, plowing down guards before one of them managed to rope his back legs together, yanking him down. He whinnied shrilly. “Max!” Rapunzel shouted, but had to block another blow.
Fuck it, Eileen thought, with some hysteria. She jerked her head back, managing to hit the guard in the face. He stumbled back, and she snatched his sword from him, swinging it around and pointing it at Stalyan. He stepped back, naked shock on his face.
“Let my friends go.” Eileen hissed.
Stalyan recovered quickly, and chuckled, waving the Baron off when he stepped forward. “You had your chance for that. You blew it.”
“You’re going to let us leave. All of us.” Eileen said.
“Or what?” Stalyan asked, drawing his own sword. “You really want to do this again, sweetheart? I’d hate to mess up your pretty face. Again.”
“I’m not scared of you.” Eileen said, though that was a lie. But she was more scared of the others getting hurt, and that pushed her forward. She pulled the sword back, positioning her feet so she could more easily take a hit.
Stalyan sighed, as if disappointed. “And here I thought you had finally come to your senses.”
He swung the sword down, and Eileen realized with a chill he was going for the same spot on her head. But this time she was armed, and she blocked his blow, pushing him off.
Stalyan was bigger than her, and so was his sword. And she was in a dress. Brute force wouldn’t win this fight. She stepped back, careful not to step on the back of her dress, letting Stalyan drive her back. His cruel smile widened, and he lunged forward.
“Raps, now would be a great time to roll out that plan C!” Cassandra called.
“I don’t have a plan C!” Rapunzel said, tripping two guards with a hair lasso. “I thought the rocks would react to me!”
“They’re not reacting because they found the sundrop.” A new voice said, and Eileen glanced over, managing to catch sight of a tall woman in a coat, a deep black sword strapped to her back. Her thick white hair was tied back, and half her face was painted red. She smiled with mostly good-natured mischief, taking a bite of cake. “That would be you.” She clarified, gesturing to Rapunzel with a fork.
“And who the hell is this?!” Eileen asked shrilly, stumbling when Stalyan swung at her again.
“Weird shadow lady,” Cassandra said. “Try to keep up.”
“I’m not that weird.” The woman said, and with a ringing battle cry, she jumped into the fray. She cut Maximus free, and he whinnied victoriously.
Eileen grinned, and Stalyan growled. “Makes no difference for you!” He shouted, lunging forward. Eileen dodged, and her back hit the wall. Stalyan laughed, raising his sword-
There was her opening.
She lunged forward, tackling Stalyan. He shouted in surprise, and the sword fell from his grip. Eileen put her foot on top of his chest and pointed the sword at his throat. “You’re still an overconfident dumbass.” She panted.
He smiled, despite it. “You won’t kill me.”
Sudden rage at his confidence in her mercy clouded her mind so suddenly it made her dizzy. She clenched the sword so tightly her knuckles went white, and she pressed the tip of the sword to his throat. His smile died, and something new came into his eye: fear.
“You want to bet on that?” Eileen asked quietly, surprised by how dark her voice was.
It would be so easy, so simple to just push the point of the sword through his throat, watch him choke and gasp as he bled out slowly, dying with that fear in his eyes. And it would feel so, so cathartic.
But she glanced up and saw Rapunzel, and met her eyes. The rage abated slightly, but only enough to remember that she wasn’t Flynn Rider, ex-girlfriend of Stalyan. Eileen Fitzherbert was more than that, and not defined by him and his morals. She held up her hand, and Rapunzel smiled, tossing her the frying pan. Eileen caught it.
“I should kill you,” She said, almost sadly. “It’s what you would do.”
She tested the weight of the pan in her hands. “But I’m better than you.”
She swung the frying pan down as hard as she could, hitting him right between the eyes. He went limp instantly, unconscious. Eileen tossed the frying pan back to Rapunzel, surprised by how shaky she felt.
There was a furious roar behind her, and Eileen turned just in time to block the Baron’s golden sword. “You’ll pay for that!” He shouted, swinging again. The antidote hung out from his jacket, tantalizingly close, but if Eileen went for it she was going to lose a hand, if not her head.
She blocked another swing, stumbling back. The Baron was a monster of a man, and he wouldn’t fall for the same trick that Stalyan had. And she didn’t have time to lure him into a trap. Lance was on his last leg.
Pascal scuttled up the Baron’s shoulder, grabbing the chain for the antidote. The Baron growled, grabbing the lizard and tossing him away roughly. “No!” Eileen said, trying to rush past the man, but he grabbed her arm and threw her back.
She collided with a table and heard glass shatter, feeling the shards cutting her arms. She was covered in red wine, and they looked like bloodstains on the dress, and the drink mixed painfully with the new wounds on her arms.
She reached for her sword, but the Baron kicked it away, placing his foot on her chest and pushing down. She hissed in pain, feeling the glass underneath her.
“I should have done this from the beginning!” He roared, opening his ring. The spider climbed out, staring at Eileen, beady eyes filled with spite. She leaned away, desperate.
Her fingers brushed a shard of a wine glass, and she gripped it, ignoring the sting of it, and swung at the Baron. He jerked back, surprised, and the spider scurried up his arm. He stepped back, panic on his face. “No, no no-ah!” He shouted when the spider bit him, and Eileen rose to her feet.
He reached for the chain on his neck, but it was gone. There was a squeak, and he turned to see Pascal pouring the antidote into Lance’s open mouth. Lance coughed, looked around, and smiled loopily when he saw Eileen. He waved vaguely, and Eileen felt her eyes fill up with tears.
The Baron turned to Eileen, murder in his eyes. “If I’m going down,” He said, picking up his sword. “I’m taking you with me!”
Eileen stepped back, glaring defiantly, oddly unafraid-
“Hey Baron!” A frying pan attached to a strand of golden hair swung out, hit him in the back of the head. He went down instantly, and Rapunzel yanked the pan back, smiling.
Stalyan stumbled to his feet, a big welt above his eyebrow. He looped his arm around his father, helping him to his feet. “We’ll find the antidote,” He said, glaring at Eileen with open fury. “And then I will settle this, Rider.”
“I’d love to see you try.” She said. She stepped forward, brushing herself off, and felt a wave of pride when Stalyan stepped away from her. “And it’s Eileen. Try to remember.”
*** *** ***
“You’re sure you’re okay?” Eileen asked, stretched out in front of the fire.
“Never better,” Lance assured her, smiling. “Though, was I hallucinating a tall lady with a black sword, or…?”
“Unless it was a collective hallucination, no.” Eileen said, beyond relieved to be out of the wedding dress and back in her old clothes. She didn’t remember what she did with it. Either she burned it or tore it to little shreds. It didn’t really matter. “She kinda just...disappeared after the fight.”
“Hey.” Eileen looked up at the voice, and saw Rapunzel. She bit her lip, pretending like she didn’t feel sick when Rapunzel sat next to her, and stared at her hands.
“Lance, do you...mind if I talk to Eileen for a moment?” Rapunzel asked.
Lance glanced at Eileen, and she nodded. “Sure,” Lance stood up. “No problem. I’ll be in the wagon.” He patted her shoulder softly, and left.
Rapunzel wriggled. “...you okay?”
“Yeah,” Eileen said. “Thanks to you guys. Just a few scrapes.”
“That’s good.” Rapunzel said, and silence fell between the two.
Eileen closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and released it. “Alright,” She said, trying to keep her voice light. “If you give me the night to pack, I can be out before dawn.”
“What?” Rapunzel asked.
“Lance’ll probably want to come with me, but if you want him to stay, I can probably convince him to do so.” Eileen said, staring into the fire.
“I-what? What are you talking about?” Rapunzel asked.
Eileen blinked. “I...leaving. I…” She trailed off.
“Why would you want you to-oh…” Rapunzel pursed her lips. “Right.”
“I won’t take any food, don’t worry.” Eileen said softly.
“No!” Rapunzel burst out, and Eileen looked up, startled. “I...I don’t want you to leave, Eileen. I don’t…” She sighed, seeming to collect herself.
“I...I only heard the last part of your conversation,” She said quietly. “I...I told Cassandra, because I didn’t know what it meant.”
“You didn’t-oh. Right.” Eileen said. Gothel probably didn’t offer Rapunzel a very diverse education, and it wasn’t like it was a hot topic of discussion in the castle.
Until now, probably, She thought, her stomach turning.
“She explained it to me, and then explained why you would, you know. Want to keep it a secret.” Rapunzel said.
Eileen sighed. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t...don’t apologize,” Rapunzel said quietly. “I’m the one that’s sorry.”
Eileen looked at her, confused.
“I...I can’t imagine you thinking that we would hate you if we knew. I can’t imagine feeling like you would need to hide yourself like that, and...I’m so, so sorry if I ever made you upset or uncomfortable,” Rapunzel said. “I’m so sorry that you thought you had to hide from us.”
“You couldn’t have known.” Eileen said.
“That doesn’t mean it’s alright.” Rapunzel said. She sighed. “You’re my best friend, Eileen. I don’t ever want you to worry about me, or any of us hating you for being a lesbian.”
Eileen was quiet, shifting slightly at how easily Rapunzel threw the word out as if it were completely inconsequential. Like they were discussing her hair color instead of her sexuality.
“If…” Rapunzel paused. “If you don’t mind me asking-”
“Go ahead, I don’t care.” Eileen said.
Rapunzel pursed her lips. “I just...Stalyan. Why? And also, why him?”
Eileen sighed, picking up a sticking and poking the fire. “I dunno. I...I was a lot younger. A stupid kid, really, and I didn’t know well enough. And I never loved him. I never really even liked him,” She was quiet for a moment. “I think...I think I would have killed him back there if I had been alone.”
Rapunzel was quiet, and Eileen bit her lip. “Sorry, that’s a bit morbid.”
“I don’t blame you,” Rapunzel said quietly. “And Lance...knew? About you?”
“Only by accident, really,” Eileen said. “He kinda...forgot to knock and walked in.”
“Oh.” Rapunzel said, biting her lip slightly.
“It’s alright, you can laugh,” Eileen said. “It’s funny now.”
“You’re one of the most important people in the world to me, Eileen,” Rapunzel said. “I thought...I really thought I was never going to see you again. That you were going to leave.”
Eileen looked down, suddenly ashamed of her old plan to bolt. She had promised to stay, after all, and even if the princess had decided to kick her off the team, she owed her a goodbye, at least.
You’re a runner, sweetheart, and a damn good one.
“I’m sorry.” Eileen said again, but Rapunzel shook her head.
“Don’t apologize! None of it is your fault! I’m just…” She sighed, and smiled at her. “I’m just really glad you’re okay. And...I still really want you to stay. If you still want to, that is.”
“I do,” Eileen said immediately, and then coughed, realizing she probably sounded desperate. “I mean...yeah. I do.”
Rapunzel smiled brightly, and for a moment Eileen considered spilling the rest of her guts to her-
That’s enough secrets for today, Fitzherbert.
“Not bad, Ellie,” Cassandra clapped her on the shoulder, sitting next to her. “Luring that bastard into thinking he had you wasn’t a horrible move.”
“Are you complimenting me?” Eileen asked.
“Don’t get a big head about it,” Cassandra smiled. “And anyway, if anyone gives you trouble, let me know so I can cut them into little pieces.”
“I can handle myself.” Eileen said.
“I know, but I still want to.” Cassandra said.
“Same here!” Lance said, plopping down next to them, a sandwich in hand.
Maximus and Fidella whinnied their own agreement, and Pascal squeaked, waving his tiny lizard fists as though that was threatening.
“Oh my God.” Eileen rolled her eyes, but couldn’t hide a wide smile.
“I was hoping to find you here,” The woman from before with the black sword emerged from the forest like a spectre, and Eileen’s hand drifted to her knife. “I come in peace. And with a gift.” She said.
“Adira,” Rapunzel said, standing up. “Who are you?”
“A friend,” Adira said, holding out a scrap of paper to Rapunzel. “And I am here to make sure you get to the end of your journey.”
Rapunzel unfurled the paper and gasped. It was a ripped piece of scroll, a piece of the one she had been carrying. “I don’t have all the answers,” Adira said. “But I know this; these rocks were looking for you. And now you must follow them to the Dark Kingdom.”
Eileen wanted to say something out how ominous that was, but she didn’t. Rapunzel was quiet for a long moment, and then nodded. “Thank you.” She said, and Adira nodded, disappearing back into the shadows.
Rapunzel was quiet, and then carefully stuffed the paper into her bag. “Don’t...you wanna look at that?” Eileen asked.
Rapunzel smiled brightly, sitting beside her. “It can wait,” She said. “I have more important things to do now.”
And Eileen smiled back.
Notes:
damn wish my coming out went like this i just got shipped off to therapy which i probably needed but it wasnt tactful
also happy early halloween! and keep an eye out, because tomorrow i will be releasing an appropriately themed tangled oneshot!
Chapter 3: The Return of Quaid
Chapter Text
“Here’s the last of the water,” Eileen said, handing a heavy barrel to Cassandra. “Just a few more boxes and we’ll be ready to roll out.”
She patted Maximus on the shoulder, and he snorted. She paused when she saw Rapunzel looking glumly at the streets. “You know, Blondie,” Eileen said. “This place might not be the party central it used to be, but part of me is still going to miss this place.”
Rapunzel didn’t respond, and Eileen coughed. “Hello? You in there?”
“This place is so…” Rapunzel paused. “Sad.”
“Sad is too nice of a word,” Eileen said. “I was more thinking disgusting. But hey, now that we’ve run the Baron out, the city can turn itself around.”
“Ladies and gentlemen!” A horribly familiar voice called, and Anthony the Weasel stood on the podium in the city square, flanked by goons.
“Oh, sure, why not.” Eileen grumbled.
“You may have noticed that with the sudden departure of the Baron, there has been a vacancy in the town’s leadership,” The Weasel said. “Luckily, that position has been filled.” He gestured grandly to himself.
“He’s taking over now?” Rapunzel asked.
“Guess so,” Eileen said. “I didn’t think he had the mental capacity to do much else other than grovel and follow orders.”
“There’s going to be some changes to my city,” The Weasel continued. “In a word: expansion. Any neighboring field, fjord, or forest now belongs to me. And people, growth like that requires capital. So I’ve come to collect.”
His goons jumped down immediately, shaking down people for cash. Eileen made a face. “We better skedaddle.” She said.
“But-” Rapunzel said, but Cassandra poked her head around the corner.
“I know you see people in trouble, Raps, but this isn’t our fight,” Cassandra said. “Don’t do anything-and she’s gone.”
Eileen shrugged. “I don’t know what you expected.”
“Hey!” Rapunzel rushed to the podium. “Weasel! Leave the people of Vardaros alone!”
“Ah, Princess,” The Weasel said. “Still in town? Let me see you out.” He snapped his fingers, and the goons jumped to attention.
Rapunzel immediately let down her hair, lassoing a man and yanking him off his feet. Eileen took that as her cue, drawing her knife and lunging at two shorter guards, disarming them and chasing them off easily.
Rapunzel knocked the Weasel to the ground, who scowled. “You fancy you’re helping these people, Princess?” He asked. “They know I’ll be back. Only next time, I’ll bring extra muscle!”
He scrambled to his feet, running off before Eileen could do anything to stop him. “In four days time, we’ll be taking it all! Thanks to you!” He shouted over his shoulder.
The crowd broke out into angry mumbling, and Eileen tensed, hoping a riot wouldn’t break out. A teenage girl with pigtails, the one who had lured Eileen into an alley not long ago, glared at Rapunzel. “Vardaros is no place for heroes.” She snapped, and walked off.
Rapunzel stood in the city square, crushed.
*** *** ***
“Rapunzel, I know you want to help,” Eileen said, blowing on her soup and leaning against the wagon. “But we can’t just stay here and beat up the Weasel forever.”
“It’d be nice, though. Pummeling him is pretty satisfying.” Cassandra said.
“You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to help themselves.” Lance said.
Rapunzel made a face. “I keep hearing how great this city used to be,” She said. “Greatness doesn’t go away. It may get beaten down, or hide itself from fear or doubt, but it doesn’t go away. You of all people should know that sometimes, all that’s needed to get the best of what’s inside you is a little help!”
Eileen and Lance glanced at each other.
“So let’s get out there, go door to door if we have to, and rally those people to take a stand!” Rapunzel said.
“Wait,” Eileen said. “Door to door?!”
*** *** ***
Rapunzel sighed, hours later after very nearly going door to door.
“Not one person.” She said sadly.
Eileen winced. “Look, I don’t think these are the kind of people to be rallied by speeches. No offense.”
“I don’t get it,” Rapunzel said. “Why won’t these people let me help them?”
“Because you’re an outsider,” Eileen turned to see the teenage girl from before, leaning on a weapons cart. “Also, you’re a naive princess who insists the glass is half full, even when it’s obviously bone dry. That’s a really annoying trait. Especially here.” She shrugged. “You’re basically everything that people in this city despise.”
“You could’ve stopped at an outsider,” Rapunzel said, slightly perturbed. “But okay, I get it, Vex. We need someone these people can trust. Someone who can offer a long-term solution.”
Maximus nickered his approval. “Someone they look up too…” Rapunzel mused, and paused when she caught sight of an old, decrepit statue of a man offering help to a young child.
Instantly, Eileen recognized the statue. “Captain Quaid,” She said, a memory from a million years ago popping into her head. “He used to be sheriff back in the day.”
“First guy to ever arrest us,” Lance said fondly. “And the second. And third.”
“And fifth.” Eileen added.
“Fifth?” Cassandra asked.
“We go to other places.” Eileen shrugged.
“He was almost like family,” Lance sighed. “We called him Captain Quaid the Blade. He was known for his cunning, strength, and bravery. But above all else, he was proud of his city. His pride was infectious. People loved Quaid, and they loved Vardaros.”
“What happened to him?” Rapunzel asked.
“He quit,” Vex deadpanned. “Or at least, that’s what I was told. He was before my time, but the few people here who remember the glory days say he met his match. No one hears much from him anymore.”
“Do you know where we could find him?” Rapunzel asked.
“I do,” Vex smiled. “But it’s gonna cost you.”
“Wait wait wait,” Eileen said. “Let me get this straight: you wanna find a past-his-prime lawman, somehow convince him to come out of retirement, and inspire these people to fight back against the Weasel, in four days? And you’re paying her to take us to him?”
“Do you think it’ll work?” Rapunzel asked.
“I’m not the only one who remembers her luring us into a trap, right?” Eileen said.
“It wasn’t anything personal,” Vex shrugged. “Just cash.”
“If we say it’ll never happen in a million years,” Cassandra said. “Would it change your mind?”
Rapunzel just smiled widely, and Eileen sighed. “Just pay her so we can get this over with.”
*** *** ***
“Here you are.” Vex said unenthusiastically, gesturing to a small cottage on the hilltop. Rapunzel crept forward, knocking lightly on the door.
A man opened the door slightly, a critical eye peering out. “Captain Quaid?” Rapunzel asked.
“Who’s asking?” The man asked after a moment.
“It’s Rapunzel,” Rapuzel said. “I-” She paused when the door slammed shut.
“Friendly fellow.” Eileen said.
“Told you everyone hates you.” Vex said.
Rapunzel scowled. “Captain Quaid?” She called, knocking on the door again. She bent over, peeking inside the mail slot. “If you don’t open this door, I’ll, uh...keep knocking!” She knocked several times, but there was still no answer.
“And I’ll just keep knocking! If my knuckles start to hurt, I’ll just use my other hand!” She called out.
The door swung open, and Quaid looked out, scowling. Rapunzel smiled. “Hi!”
Quaid sighed, grabbing an hourglass and flipping it over. “Three minutes,” He said. “Not a grain more.”
He ducked back inside, and Rapunzel grinned, motioning for the others to follow.
Eileen started to follow, but Quaid glared at her and Lance. “Hey! Quaid!” Lance grinned. “Remember us? The ‘not-guilty’ twins?”
“You degenerates stay out here,” Quaid said. “Touch, look, or breathe on anything, I’ll get you where you sleep.” He slammed the door shut.
Eileen scowled. “Well, now I just want to take stuff.”
Lance glanced at her, hopeful.
“No, Lance, we shouldn’t.”
“It’d be fun though.”
“Yeah…”
*** *** ***
“So let me get this right,” Vex said, looking exhausted. “You need us to reinspire the sheriff who you need to reinspire the city?”
“Did training not go well then?” Eileen asked. She had spotted the lawmen-turned-beekeeper trying to shoot a bow and arrow, and it had been...not good.
“He’s a little rusty, and just needs to get his confidence back!” Rapunzel said.
“And how do you plan to do that?” Vex asked.
“I’m not,” Rapunzel said. “You are.”
“My fee?” Vex asked, and Rapunzel handed her a shiny coin.
“We’re gonna go broke because of her.” Eileen grumbled.
“Lance, how’s your acting?” Rapunzel said.
“My acting?” Lance chuckled. “You are looking at the star of Vardaros’ own, ‘A Walk in the Bushes’! I was the bush.”
“For one night only.” Eileen added.
“It was a special performance.” Lance said.
“It was shit,” She turned to Rapunzel. “Please tell me you have a backup plan.”
*** *** ***
“Help!” Shorty yelled. “I’m in Mortimer peril! Someone do something!”
“Oh my God.” Eileen said, hiding her face in her hands.
“Sh!” Rapunzel scolded her.
“Stand and deliver!” Lance said grandly, donned in a mask and cape, pointing a rapier at Shorty, pretending to rob him.
“I am standing.” Shorty said.
“This is a disaster.” Eileen said.
“Okay, Vex, you’re up.” Rapunzel said.
Vex stood up leisurely from her hiding place, walking out. “Oh no!” She said, sounding bored. “A holdup! In broad daylight! What can we do? Oh look!” She pointed at Captain Quaid, who had been busy moving his bees through the streets in preparation to leave before the Weasel returned. “Captain Quaid! Thank God you just happen to be here!”
She rushed up and grabbed his wrist, pulling him over to Lance and Shorty.
Lance pointed his rapier at Quaid. “Thou thinkest thou can defeat me?!” He demanded. “‘Tis to laugh!”
Eileen elbowed Rapunzel. “I warned you he was bad.”
Lance jumped forward, swinging wildly. Quaid easily blocked with his own sword, looking surprised with himself. “Hey everyone!” Vex shouted. “Look at this!”
The crowd paused, watching the sword fight with interest, as though still deciding what to make of it. Quaid knocked the sword out of Lance’s hand, and the latter fell to his knees dramatically. “Oh, the ignominy!” He declared. “Quaid hath returned like a tempest of justice that rained upon the parched earth of crime!”
“I’m gonna bully him over this for the rest of my life.” Eileen whispered.
Vex clapped loudly, and soon the rest of the crowd joined in, cheering. Quaid smiled tremulously, and Rapunzel grinned at Eileen. “I told you Quaid just needed a little push!” She said, taking Lance’s mask. “Now watch: hope is contagious.”
Eileen elbowed Lance. “‘Ignominy’? Do you even know what that word means?”
*** *** ***
It seemed like Rapunzel was right. Quaid spent the rest of the day busting petty criminals, and by the end of it was in such a good mood that he invited them all back to his cottage for dinner, not even glaring at Eileen and Lance.
“Oh!” Rapunzel said, pulling something out of her bag. “I almost forgot I made you this!” She handed something wrapped in a handkerchief to Quaid.
He unwrapped it and smiled. It was a shiny badge, this time adorned with a bee design. “Guess you’ll get rid of that old thing, huh?” Vex asked, motioning to the old one pinned to his shirt.
“Well,” Quaid said, unpinning it. “I’ve been thinking. Every sheriff needs a deputy, right?” He handed her the badge, and her face split into a smile before she covered it quickly with her usual bored expression.
“I mean, yeah, sure, whatever.” Vex shrugged.
“To the new Vardaros!” Lance said, raising a glass and drinking it.
“I think that’s bee pheromones.” Cassandra said, and Lance spat immediately, most of it landing on Maximus, who snorted.
“Why the hell is that in a drinking glass?!” He asked.
There was a loud buzzing, and bees poured out of the beehives, and Maximus whinnied shrilly, racing away in a panic and knocking over the table. Vex fell, her bag flying up into the air. It landed on Quaid, and Lance’s cloak tumbled out.
Quaid frowned. “This cloak…it’s the same one that the damned crook wore in town.”
“No no!” Lance said. “It’s not a cloak! It’s a towel! I’m going swimming later.” He grabbed the bag and cloak, but the bag opened, spilling coins.
“Vex, did you…” Quaid’s face fell, and he sighed deeply, as if disappointed in himself. “You never believed, did you?”
“Captain, it’s not what it looks like!” Vex said.
“You staged the whole thing.” Quaid said slowly. He set his jaw, and turned away. “I...think you all best leave.” He walked back to his cottage.
“Captain, I just thought you-” Rapunzel started, but the door slammed shut.
“Now!” Quaid ordered.
“You’re the one that gave up on this city because no one wanted to fight for Vardaros!” Rapunzel said. “Well, you just made a deputy, and she’s ready to fight! Are you gonna let her fight alone?!”
There was no answer, and Rapunzel looked crushed.
Eileen sighed. “Sorry, Blondie,” She said softly. “I don’t think he’s coming out.”
*** *** ***
Eileen stood, knife at the ready, prepared for the Weasel to roll in with whatever help he had picked up. “I can’t believe I’m doing this.” Vex said, standing beside them, her fists clenched for a fight. She glanced down at her badge. “I feel like an idiot.”
Eileen nudged her gently. “Becoming one of the good guys will do that.” She winked, and Vex smiled slightly in spite of herself.
There was shuffling, and Anthony the Weasel appeared, grinning, flanked by his goons. “Well well!” He said jovially. “The princess and her playgroup are still here. And it looks like there’s a new sheriff in town.” His eyes fell on Vex’s badge, and he grinned.
“I’m a deputy, asshole!” Vex snapped.
“Alright, Deputy,” The Weasel said. “Allow me to introduce you to my special guest. He is the most deadly, most fearsome, and quite possibly the nastiest bounty hunter money can buy...the Collector.”
From around the corner, there was loud clanking, and a man-no, more a mountain-emerged, taking big, methodical steps as though he were more machine than human. His face and body were covered by thick, rusted armor, and Eileen couldn’t see his eyes through the mask, which somehow made him scarier.
The Collector growled, animal-like.
“Seeing as how I went through the trouble of hiring him,” The Weasel said. “I’d hate to lose my deposit.”
“If you think I’m backing down, you are wrong-” Rapunzel said, but the Collector moved forward jerkily towards her.
“Rapunzel!” Cassandra said, drawing her sword. Eileen followed, unsure what her knife was going to do against the armor, but she couldn’t just sit by helplessly.
The Collector raised his arms, and something shot out from a cannon like fixture to his wrists. Eileen tried to dodge, but a thick rope suddenly wrapped around her, throwing her backwards. The same thing happened to Cassandra, and then Lance when he reached down to help them. “Shit.” Eileen muttered.
“Collect this!” Rapunzel challenged, setting Pascal on Maximus with a handful of her hair. Maximus darted forward, racing around the Collector before he could react, and then back to Vex. Vex grabbed the other end of Rapunzel’s hair, and the two yanked forward, knocking the Collector off his feet.
The Collector instantly rose, pushed up by a spring in the back of his armor. He held his hand up, and a double headed axe with each blade the size of a watermelon popped out. Rapunzel gulped.
Rapunzel threw her hair out to try tripping him again, but the Collector anticipated it, grabbing her hair and throwing her. Rapunzel yelped, more surprised than hurt, and collided roughly with a barrel of hay. “Rapunzel!” Eileen shouted, struggling to escape.
Vex stepped back, looking ready to bolt. The Weasel chuckled. “So much for Vardaros’ new sheriff.” He said.
“Weren’t you listening, you damned old bastard?” A familiar voice said, and Quaid stepped out of the alley, a determined look on his face. Eileen felt a smile split across her face.
“She said she’s a deputy,” Quaid said, and his badge, despite the clouds, sparkled, the bee emblem golden and proud. “And I’m the sheriff.”
“Quaid the Blade!” The Weasel smiled, as though this was an extra treat he hadn’t expected. “How perfect is this? The Collector crushed you in your prime, what makes you think you can defeat him now?”
Quaid smiled, reaching for a small pot on his belt. “I can’t,” He said, and then tossed the pot over the Weasel and Collector, and Vex caught it with a grin. “But we can!”
Vex opened the pot, splashing the contents onto the Collector, who stepped back, surprised. There was a loud buzzing, and countless bees seemed to materialize out of thin air, racing towards the Collector in pursuit of the pheromones. The Collector stumbled, waving his arms, but there were too many, and they crawled between the cracks of his armor, and into the tiny holes of his mask. Eileen winced, almost sympathetic.
Almost.
The Collector gave a metallic scream, thundering off, pursued by bees, and the Weasel looked nervous, looking around. “Come on, people!” Vex shouted. “Enough hiding! This is our city! Together, we can take back our home!”
The Weasel looked around, frantic, but Vex was right. As if by magic, people began to emerge from shuttered houses, the same determined expression on their faces. “You heard her,” Quaid said. “Let’s show these old bastards who this town belongs to.”
The crowd cheered, and as if flipping a switch, the Weasel turned tail and began to flee. Vex stuck out her leg, tripping him, and he fell hard. When he managed to scramble to his feet, his nose was more crooked than before, and bloody. Vex laughed when she saw him and his goons fleeing, shouting obscenities that turned into shrieks of fear whenever a townsperson reached for them.
Rapunzel cut Eileen loose, and she stood up, rubbing her wrists. “Well, what do you know?” She said. “These people can smile after all.”
Rapunzel smiled, watching people gather around Quaid, who pushed Vex forward gently with a nod. Vex smiled shyly, but Eileen could see the pride in her eyes. “I have a feeling that under all the grime, dirt, and gunk,” Rapunzel said. “Is a beautiful city waiting to shine.”
“I think you might be right.” Eileen said, and the sun, as if finally finding the courage to look down, peeked out among the clouds, lighting the streets up.
Notes:
its election time! lets hope i don't get hate crimed!!!!
Chapter 4: Vigor the Visionary
Notes:
c-can i offer you a chapter in these trying times?
also, i forgot to mention, but yes! Eileen does have the season 2 outfit change
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“You really didn’t have to drag me way out here.” Eileen said, glancing over to Rapunzel, who was nearly falling off of Fidella, leaning so close to a flower.
“I know, but I feel like it’s been forever since the two of us have just hung out together!” Rapunzel smiled. “Everything’s been so busy lately. I feel like the last time we really got to be around each other was after the snowstorm, and that wasn’t much fun.”
“Mhm,” Eileen said, remembering the impromptu sleepover. “We’re not really alone. Max and Fidella are here.”
“You know what I mean,” Rapunzel said. “It’ll be fun!”
“What do you have planned?” Eileen asked, and smiled when Rapunzel frowned. “Didn’t really think that far ahead, did you?”
“I kinda thought we wouldn’t even get the chance,” She admitted. “Everything’s been such a mess lately.”
“I guess you’re right,” Eileen said. “That’s okay. We can just...explore.”
Rapunzel grinned widely, and then paused. “Do you hear that?”
Eileen tilted her head, frowning when she heard high pitched chimes. “You mean the bells in the middle of nowhere? Yeah, I hear them.”
Rapunzel’s grin grew. “I guess we found something to do.”
*** *** ***
They came across a tiny wooden caravan that had a large wind chime, still drifting and tinkling gently in the breeze. Rapunzel glanced at a large chalkboard. “‘Vigor the Visionary,’” She read aloud. “‘See-er and know-er of all.’ Wow! A real psychic!”
Eileen rolled her eyes. “Real psychic? There’s no such thing.”
“Ahem.” Someone said, and Eileen jumped, only barely biting back a curse. An old, hunched woman smiled up at her.
“Greetings, travelers,” The old woman said. “My name is Madame Canardist, and inside this wagon is the famous clairvoyant, Vigor the Visionary!”
She gestured wildly. “He has predicted the fates of emperors, the futures of pharaohs, and destinies of dynasties even! And he is offering a once in a lifetime special...one fortune, for a mere five silver pieces.”
Rapunzel grabbed Eileen’s arm, looking excited. “Eileen, did you hear that?!” She dragged her up the steps of the wagon, and Eileen ducked under the doorframe to get in.
“You don’t actually believe in psychics, do you?” Eileen said.
“Well, I don’t know if it’s real or not,” Rapunzel said. “But what if it is? It’s kind of fun to believe in stuff like that.”
The door slammed shut, and Madame Canardist held out a bag. “Silver,” She said. “His omniscience requires five pieces of silver.”
“We’re gonna go broke between this and Vex.” Eileen muttered, but Rapunzel happily dumped her coins in the bag.
Madame Canardist pushed between them, pausing in front of a curtain. “Prepare to be astonished,” She said. “He’s telekinetic, he’s telepathic, and he’ll tele-you-the-future!”
“I’m never getting these ten minutes back.” Eileen said, scowling when Rapunzel elbowed her.
“Please welcome the world’s most prophetic prognosticator...” She grabbed the edge of the curtain and flung it back. “Vigor the Visionary!”
Eileen blinked, unable to see in the dim room. Someone leaned over a crystal ball, but their features were impossible to make out. Madame Canardist banged a gong, and the room lit up with candles, which didn’t seem very safe, but Eileen had bigger issues.
Because Vigor was a monkey in a turban and diaper.
“Aw!” Rapunzel said, smiling.
“That’s a monkey.” Eileen said.
“He’s adorable!” Rapunzel cooed.
“We lost five silver pieces to see a monkey.” Eileen said.
Rapunzel grabbed Eileen’s hand and dragged her to the table where the crystal ball sat. Eileen sat down, trying not to make eye contact with the monkey. She had heard that upset them.
“Vigor,” Madame Canardist said. “These ladies have come in search of your infinite guidance. If you are willing, blink twice.”
The monkey shuffled around, and blinked twice. Rapunzel gasped. “Did you see that?!”
“Please!” Madame Canardist said as the monkey climbed onto the crystal ball. “Vigor will need total silence as he contacts the regions beyond.”
The monkey grunted, and banged on the crystal ball. It turned a poison green, and the table began to vibrate. Eileen leaned back, a bit shocked by all the theatrics, but Rapunzel looked ecstatic.
As quickly as it had started, the crystal ball went back to normal, and the monkey chattered. “Uh huh,” Madame Canardist said, pulling out a pen and paper, scribbling. “Yeah, got it.”
She held up the paper. “Vigor the Visionary has spoken!” She declared, and handed the paper to Rapunzel.
Rapunzel opened the paper, looking excited. “‘If you see someone fall,’” She read aloud. “‘Pick them up.’”
“Oh my God,” Eileen groaned. “You could have at least tried to make a good fortune. It’s not even a fortune!”
Rapunzel smiled, embarrassed, pulling Eileen out. She grumbled loudly. “We should demand our money back.”
*** *** ***
“What do you think it means?” Rapunzel asked, staring at the fortune as they rode back.
“It means you got scammed.” Eileen said.
“Well, so what?” Rapunzel said. “Maybe it was all just a trick, but what if, what if, it wasn’t?”
Eileen sighed, rolling her eyes. “And I’m surprised at you, Eileen,” Rapunzel said. “We’ve seen some really strange things together, why are you being so cynical?”
“Cynical?” Eileen scoffed. “I believe in some crazy things, believe me, and that’s coming from someone who didn’t believe in magic until I saw your hair glow underwater. But I draw the line at fortune tellers. Especially monkey fortune tellers. And I can prove it!”
She pulled the reins. “Max! Back to the wagon!”
*** *** ***
“Alright, didn’t expect this.” Eileen said, coming upon Madame Carnardist sobbing on the ground as though the world were ending.
“Madame Canardist?!” Rapunzel asked, rushing up to her. “Are you okay?!”
“No!” The old woman wailed. “My Vigor has been taken! Thieves snatched him right out of his wagon!” She broke down sobbing.
“It’s going to be alright,” Rapunzel said soothingly. “Eileen and I will find the thieves that took Vigor, and we will bring him back.”
“Hey, don’t lump me into this!” Eileen said. “I don’t wanna spend my one free day chasing down a…” She trailed off, spotting something sparkle in the dirt. “Okay, we’ll find him.”
“I knew you’d come around.” Rapunzel said.
“Not necessarily. I just have a good idea of who took him.” Eileen said, holding up a small, dangly golden earring.
The very one she had given to Angry and Red.
*** *** ***
They found the girls easily. Angry was irritably telling Red that they had to save the last banana they were leading the monkey off with, but she trailed off when she saw them, hiding the banana on the stick behind her back like she wasn’t already busted.
“Eileen! Princess Rapunzel!” She smiled. “Hi!”
Red waved.
“Cut the crap, Angry. Give me the monkey.” Eileen said.
The monkey bit the banana, and Angry shoved it in the bushes. “What monkey?” She asked innocently.
Evidently unable to keep up the sternness any longer, Rapunzel swept the two girls up in a hug. “Oh, we missed you!”
The girls smiled, hugging back. “We missed you too. Especially Red,” Angry elbowed her sister. “She won’t shut up about you.”
“Aw!” Rapunzel cooed, and then caught sight of Eileen’s look and coughed. “I mean...you two are in trouble!”
“None of you saw the error in your ways?” Eileen asked. “Not even after the Baron incident? And if you have to steal, why steal a monkey?”
“We haven’t stolen anything since we left Corona!” Angry said.
Eileen raised her eyebrow, and Angry huffed. “Honest!” Red nodded in agreement.
“But we had no choice,” Angry said. “This monkey holds a very important secret.”
“Mhm.” Eileen said doubtfully.
“Red and I were walking through the forest, and this weird old lady came out of nowhere and said ‘Have you heard of this psychic? He can tell you your future and your past for one silver piece!’” Angry said.
“What-she charged us five!” Eileen said indignantly.
Angry gave her a look. “So then this monkey comes out, and does this weird future prediction dance. Then he gets a funny look and grabs my necklace. The weird lady says ‘That necklace you’re wearing has been in your family for a long time’. And I think, how does he know that’s the only thing I have left from my family? Then, she reads our fortune.”
Angry pulled out a small slip of paper and handed it to Eileen. It read ‘Follow the leaf to find your tree’.
“I asked her if she meant, like, my family tree, but she said that we need to give the monkey more money for that,” Angry said. “So we borrowed him. Because we don’t have any money.”
“Of course. What else was there to do?” Eileen said, trying to keep bitterness out of her voice. Scamming them was one thing, they could afford it. But taking advantage of two kids was something else entirely.
“Look,” Eileen said, kneeling down to their height. “I understand why you did it, but no matter what you call it, it’s still stealing. You gotta bring him back.”
“No no no!” Angry said, grabbing the monkey. “I can’t bring him back now!”
“Eileen, I know you want them to do the right thing,” Rapunzel said. “I do, too. But they’ve been on their own a long time, and if there’s even the slightest chance that Vigor can bring them to a home, shouldn’t we take it?”
Eileen sighed, cursing her ever-softening heart. “There isn’t a chance,” She said. “But fine.”
Angry jumped up, looking overjoyed. “That said!” Eileen said quickly. “You have to promise on Maximus’ life that you’ll return Vigor once this is all over with.” Maximus whinnied in protest, but Eileen ignored him.
“Is that clear?” Rapunzel asked.
The two girls glanced at each other and smiled. “Deal.” Angry said, stretching her hand out.
Eileen reached out, but jerked back when the monkey tried to lick her hand. “Ugh.”
“Okay,” Rapunzel said. “So now all we’ve gotta do is figure out how to get Vigor to do his thing.”
“Mm,” Eileen said, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a silver coin. “I think I have an idea.”
She held out the coin to the monkey. “Hey buddy,” She said, in the same voice she would use for a puppy. “You wanna take us to Angry’s family?”
The monkey shrieked, leaping onto a log and laying out a deck of tarot cards. Rapunzel gasped, but Eileen didn’t want to think about where he had been keeping those cards. She flicked the coin to him, and he caught it, stuffing it into his turban. He grabbed a card and held it up.
“The Wheel of Fortune?” Angry asked. The monkey shoved the card into his mouth.
“Why would he eat it?” Rapunzel asked.
“Because he’s a monkey.” Eileen said.
Red was quiet, and then pulled out an old and ripped map. She tugged Rapunzel’s sleeve and pointed to it. There was a city called Fortuna on it. Rapunzel knelt down. “Red’s right,” She said in an awed voice. “There’s a city named Fortuna not far from here. That’s what wheel of fortune meant!”
“Oh my God,” Eileen groaned. “You got Fortuna out of wheel of fortune? That’s just a coincidence.”
“Is it a coincidence, Vigor?” Rapunzel asked the monkey. “Blink twice for yes, and once for no.”
The monkey sneezed, and happened to blink along with it. The girls squealed in excitement, and Rapunzel looked at Eileen like she had been proven horribly wrong. “Oh, oh! Look at that!” Rapunzel said. “A single blink! Two coincidences in a row?”
“Yes.” Eileen grumbled.
“I think not!” Rapunzel declared. “Fortuna, here we come!”
*** *** ***
For some reason, Eileen was expecting a grand city with streets lined with gold. ‘Fortuna’ was just such a grandiose name. She didn’t expect a foggy village, one that seemed eerily abandoned, but she probably should have with her luck.
“This place gives me the creeps.” Rapunzel said, pulling Red close to her. Eileen did the same with Angry, ready to yank out her knife at any given moment.
“Nothing to worry about,” Eileen said anyway. “Just a quiet little town. With creepy fog. You know, the works.”
A barrel a few yards ahead of them shuffled, and the top of a purple octopus popped out. “Beware!” It hissed, and Angry shrieked in surprise, grabbing Eileen’s arm. Maximus backed up suddenly in surprise, and the monkey shrieked as well, jumping off of Eileen onto a rooftop.
“Talking octopus!” Eileen said. “Sure, on brand with the fake psychic monkey!”
“You shouldn’t be here,” The octopus rose, and Eileen realized it was just a man with an octopus on his head, though that was hardly any better. “You scared the whole town, you did! We thought you were…” He looked around in fear. “The Daylights!”
“The Daylights?” Rapunzel asked, dismounting. Eileen followed suit.
“The Daylight Thieves,” Octopus Head clarified. “Nasty crooks of the worst kind! Beware!”
“They stole my piccolo!” Another man said mournfully, sticking his head out of his hiding place. “My lovely mahogany piccolo?! What’s a minstrel without his piccolo?!”
“Beware!” Octopus Man said again.
“Dear Lord,” Eileen said, watching the man sink slowly into the barrel. “How does he breathe in there?”
The monkey hooted vaguely, leaning on top of a weather vane, pushing the arrow eastward. “Vigor says we need to go that way.” Angry said. She nudged Maximus, and started forward, Fidella right behind her.
Rapunzel caught sight of Eileen’s look, pulling her aside so they could walk behind the horses. “Eileen, what is it?”
“I’m just worried,” She said slowly, glancing at the two girls. “I mean, we’ve come all this way, they’re going to be crushed when nothing happens.”
“Whatever happens,” Rapunzel said softly. “We’ll be there for them.”
Eileen smiled, and then wheeled back when the monkey jumped on her head. “Dammit!”
*** *** ***
The fog didn’t let up. In fact, it only seemed to get thicker the longer they went along. “I don’t get it,” Angry said, worry clearly in her voice. “It should be here.”
“It might be!” Rapunzel said. “I...can’t really see anything in this mist.”
“Well, the end of the line is Snake Canyon,” Eileen said, looking at the map. “That’s kind of-”
She stumbled back when Maximus suddenly whinnied, blocking her off. There was the canyon, fog curling around inside it like a witch’s brew. “-hard to miss.” Eileen finished.
“Vigor, this is a dead end,” Rapunzel said. “What do we do now?”
Vigor, still seated on Eileen’s shoulder, didn’t respond, sticking his finger in his ear and then licking it. “Christ.” Eileen grumbled.
“Do you have another coin?” Rapunzel asked Eileen.
“No,” Eileen said, struggling not to snap. “I think we should go back, return the monkey, and call it a day.” She pushed the monkey off her shoulder.
The monkey suddenly yelled shrilly, jumping up on Angry’s head. She turned, and gasped, pointing at something just barely visible out of the fog. “Look!”
There was a house across the canyon, connected by a rickety rope bridge. Angry rushed forward, looking ecstatic. “He found it!” She said.
“Anybody could have-oh my God.” Eileen groaned.
“Eileen, remind me again,” Rapunzel said, voice teasing. “What was that one thing you don’t believe in? It was...it was fortune-tellers, right? Am I remembering this correctly?”
“Oh, for Chrissake,” Eileen grumbled. “Fine, whatever, we’ll follow the damn ape.”
The monkey grunted, holding out his hand. Eileen scowled, but tossed him a silver coin. The monkey shoved it into the turban, and then followed Angry and Red. “I still think this is bullshit!” She said, following the others on the bridge. It creaked eerily, but didn’t swing much, and seemed to hold. All the same, she didn’t like Angry and Red jumping on it, giggling when the bridge bounced under their weight.
The house was tiny, but gave off a homely feel. A small wooden sign depicting a tree swung outside amiably, as if inviting them inside. Angry rushed to the door, her face splitting into a wide grin when she saw someone’s silhouette through the window. “There’s people inside!” She said.
“Look,” Eileen said, suddenly acutely aware that Angry could be about to be let down very, very hard. “I know you’re excited, but try to play it cool, alright? Seeing you will probably shock them, so let me and Rapunzel do the talking first, okay?”
Angry frowned, but nodded. “Cool.” Eileen said, walking up the door and pushing it open. A young woman was sweeping, and she glanced up at them.
“Mom!” Angry shoved past them, hugging the woman around the waist tightly. “It’s me! You’re daughter!”
“I just said-” Eileen said, oddly frustrated.
The woman blinked, shocked. “I-I know you weren’t expecting this,” Angry said, suddenly looking a bit sheepish. “But Vigor told us to follow this leaf symbol on the necklace you left me with to the tree, and we weren’t sure if we would find anything, but we did and now we can be together forever!”
“This is Vigor,” Eileen said, motioning to the monkey. “And what she’s saying is that you’re her long-lost family! Hooray!” She smiled weakly, silently trying to convey to the woman to please, please God let Angry down easy because the poor kid had built her hopes sky high on a foundation of sand.
The woman looked down at Angry, and her face split into a wide smile. “Finally!” She said, kneeling down to Angry’s height. “After all these years!”
Eileen blinked, completely shocked into speechlessness.
“William!” She called into the house. “Our little girl has come home!”
A man poked his head out, presumably William. “What was that, Petunia?” He asked. His mouth fell open at the sight of Angry, or maybe it was just the motley crew standing at his doorstep. “After all these years,” He said, kneeling down. “I thought I would never see you again. Thank God you’re home…!” He swept up his wife and Angry into a tight hug.
“Wait,” Angry said suddenly, looking back. “You gotta take Red too.”
Red hid behind Eileen’s leg, looking shyly at the three. “We’re a package deal.” Angry explained.
Petunia and William glanced at each other and smiled. “Of course she’s welcome.” William said, offering his hand to the young girl. Red looked up at Eileen and Rapunzel, unsure, and at their nods she rushed forward, joining the hug.
Angry looked back, an expression of pure joy on her face that looked nearly alien when compared to her usual scowl. “Thank you.” She whispered.
Eileen picked up the monkey and closed the door, unidentifiable emotions churning in her stomach.
*** *** ***
“I know you had your doubts about Vigor,” Rapunzel said on the way back over the bridge. “But he did lead us all the way here.”
“Hm,” Eileen said. “And none of this is weird to you? Maybe we should go back.”
There was a shrill whistle, and Eileen glanced down to see the monkey blowing into a wooden flute. Rapunzel furrowed her brow. “Vigor, did you take that whistle from their house?” She asked.
“Oh shit,” Eileen said, her stomach knotting. “That’s not a whistle. That’s a piccolo.”
“A mahogany piccolo.” Rapunzel said, donning the same horrified expression that Eileen was sure she was also wearing.
She turned tail, sprinting back across the bridge, Eileen and the horses close behind her. “Look out!” Eileen said, seeing William-if that was his real name-standing at the edge of the bridge, holding an axe.
“No no no no! Fuck!” Eileen shouted, but the liar raised it and swung down, cutting the bridge.
The bridge tilted, and Eileen tried to grab the ropes, but it was too late, and she fell down, down, down into the witch’s cauldron below.
*** *** ***
“Motherfucker,” Eileen muttered, holding onto a vine as she stared down into the abyss. “There goes my relaxing free day.”
“Eileen!” She craned her neck up and saw Rapunzel. “Stay right there, I’m coming!”
“No no!” Eileen shouted back. “Stay there, I’ll find a way up!” She heard something shriek, and looked up to see the damn monkey flying down at her.
He landed on her head, and she let go, tumbling down farther into the canyon. She landed hard, and shouted in pain before she could stop herself when a harsh spike of hot pain ran up her left wrist. “Ow, ow ow ow ow…” She grumbled, holding it tightly to herself, waiting for the nausea to pass before glancing at it.
She couldn’t tell if it was broken or sprained, but it seemed to be intact from the outside. No bones poking through the skin, which was a plus. But it was already starting to swell.
The monkey was holding onto her, and shifted, blocking her view. “Get off!” She snapped, but he didn’t move.
“Eileen?!” Rapunzel shouted.
“I’m alright!” Eileen called up, fully aware her voice was strained. “Hurt my wrist a bit, but it’s alright!”
There was a loud hiss, and the monkey shifted just enough so she could see a long black snake slither right next to her. She jumped back. “Shit!” She yelped, remembering only just then there was a reason it was called Snake Canyon.
“Eileen?!” Rapunzel shouted down, sounding panicked.
“Slight hiccup in the being alright thing! There’s a ton of snakes!” She yelled up.
The monkey jumped off of her, scuttling up the vines. “Right, awesome.” She grumbled, struggling to climb up after him. The snakes slithered up after her, and she probably could have outclimbed them had it not been for her wrist.
“Ah, fuck.” She muttered, grabbing a thick vine. The vine squirmed, and she screamed when the snake she had grabbed turned around and snapped at her.
She windmilled back, and started to fall. The snakes rose as one, fangs bared and unblinking eyes watching her descent-
She stopped suddenly.
Eileen blinked, twisting her head around to see that Rapunzel had caught her, hanging down by her hair. She sighed, and smiled tiredly. “I recall telling you to stay up there.”
“Yes,” Rapunzel said, her eyes lighting up with some mischief. “But ‘If you see someone fall’...” She trailed off, grinning.
“‘Pick them up’, yeah yeah, whatever.” Eileen frowned, standing up when Maximus pulled her over the side of the cliff.
“Is your wrist alright?” Rapunzel asked.
“Mm.” Eileen glanced at it and winced. It had swollen up dramatically, but she could touch her fingers together. “It’s either a bad sprain or a little fracture,” She smiled. “Nothing we can’t fix up-” She gasped, suddenly horrified. “The girls!”
*** *** ***
Eileen practically kicked down the door, deciding not to think about how she was going to beat the criminals up with only one good hand. “You let those girls-” She paused, seeing the faux parents tied up on the ground. Red peeked out from behind them, giving Eileen and Rapunzel a look as if asking what took them so long.
“Okay, guess you don’t need me.” Eileen said, but Rapunzel frowned.
“Red, where’s Angry?” She asked.
Red frowned, looking outside. Eileen followed her gaze, her heart sinking when she saw the girl sitting on a rock, knees curled up to her chest, back to the house. “Shit.” She muttered, glancing at Rapunzel.
Rapunzel rushed out and swept Angry up in a tight hug.
Eileen followed Red out, and Angry was still hugging Rapunzel tightly, trying to blink back tears. “I-I shoulda known better,” She said quietly. “I don’t know why I believed that damn monkey.”
Angry sighed, looking down so she could more easily hide her tears. “I guess I just wanted to believe I had a family so badly that I fooled myself.”
Eileen glanced down, seeing her ripped fortune. ‘If you follow the leaf, you’ll find your tree’.
“Did you know when I met Rapunzel I was looking for a crown?” Eileen asked. “And when Rapunzel met me she was chasing lights in the sky. That’s what we thought would bring us happiness.”
“So?” Angry asked, a bit of harshness back in her voice. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Well, because you thought finding your tree would bring you to your family,” Eileen said. “But who’s here, right now?”
Angry glanced up and met Red’s eye, who shuffled. “You’ve got a family in Red. And if your journey helped you realize that,” Eileen shrugged. “I guess following your leaf helped you find your tree.”
Angry was still for a long moment, and then removed her leaf pendant, draping it across Red’s neck. Red furrowed her brow, but Angry smiled, putting her hand on her shoulder. “So I don’t forget who my family is.” She said softly.
She hugged Red tightly, and Red broke out into a huge smile, hugging back tightly.
Eileen smiled, the joy on Red’s face overwhelming the pain in her wrist.
*** *** ***
“Vigor!” Madame Canardist said when the monkey jumped on her head. She laughed, overjoyed.
“Sorry we took your monkey.” Angry said sheepishly, but Madame Canardist merely smiled.
“Did he show you what you needed to find?” She asked.
Angry smiled. “Yeah, he did.”
“Then that’ll be five silver pieces.” Madame Canardist said.
Eileen smiled, but it fell when the woman didn’t laugh. “Are you-oh my God.” She groaned. She looked back to the girls. “You two figure out who’s going to pay-they’re gone.” She sighed deeply.
She nudged Rapunzel. “I’m not paying for this.”
Rapunzel smiled, handing the woman five silver pieces. Eileen mounted Maximus, holding her arm close to herself. “There goes our free day.” She grumbled.
“Oh, it wasn’t so bad,” Rapunzel said. “We got to see Angry and Red!”
“I guess.” Eileen said.
“So…” Rapunzel mused. “Did Vigor make a believer out of you?”
“I never said that,” Eileen said. “Although I will say there were many suspicious coincidences today.”
Rapunzel laughed, and Eileen glanced back, seeing Madame Canardist leading Vigor back into the wagon. The monkey looked back, and his unfocused eyes suddenly zeroed in on Eileen with such force that she flinched. A chill went down her spine.
“You okay?” Rapunzel asked.
“I-” She looked at her and back, and the monkey was no longer looking at her. She forced a smile. “Yeah. Just looking forward to getting this fixed up.” She motioned to her wrist.
“Cass has some medical supplies.” Rapunzel said.
“Blondie,” Eileen said. “I’d sooner cut off my hand myself than let Cassandra anywhere near it.”
Notes:
a fun and angsty chapter pops up a week from today. you'll love it, i promise
Chapter 5: The Keeper of the Spire
Notes:
Me, glaring at my reflection as i sob uncontrollably at one in the morning because i got in a fight with my mom, im freaking out about an imperfect math assignment, and i got a hug that lasted for longer than two second and i spiraled because i cant remember the last time that happened: look at you. cassandra kin. disgusting. this is not bad bitch behavior
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“They’ve been talking forever.” Eileen whispered to Cassandra.
“Shush!” Cassandra elbowed her. “I’m trying to eavesdrop!”
“You know I can read lips, right?” Lance said. He squinted at Adira and Rapunzel, who were hurriedly discussing something just out of earshot. “She’s saying ‘Follow your dust to me.’”
“She definitely isn’t.” Eileen said.
Adira pointed up the mountain they had come to a rest at, and Rapunzel nodded, coming back to the group. “So…?” Cassandra prompted.
Rapunzel pursed her lips. “We need to go to the Spire,” She said. “It’s at the top of the mountain, and Adira said there’s someone there who can translate the scroll.” She held out the two pieces of ripped scroll, and Eileen frowned.
“Are we sure that’s a good idea? Going all the way up the mountain? We’re down a hand if something goes wrong.” Eileen held up her left arm, her wrist in a brace. She could still function, and even fight fairly well, but she didn’t like her odds if something really bad came up.
“We don’t have a choice,” Rapunzel said. “I have to face my destiny.”
“Oh,” Lance muttered. “Destiny. Not dust to me.”
Rapunzel gave him a strange look.
“Alright,” Cassandra said, looking up the mountain. “Spire, here we come.”
*** *** ***
“Is this it?” Eileen asked, looking up at the observatory-like house. “The Keeper’s place?”
“Let’s find out.” Rapunzel said, approaching the house.
“Stay together.” Cassandra said.
Eileen glanced down, seeing the road leading up getting narrower and narrower. “There’s not many other options.” She said.
“It’s too quiet,” Cassandra said. “I don’t like it.”
A roar echoed down the mountainside, and the group jumped. “Way to go, Cass.” Eileen grumbled.
Pascal squeaked nervously, and Rapunzel patted his head. “Hang in there, buddy.”
Rapunzel carefully approached the door and knocked, but nothing happened. She pushed it open nervously. “Hello-” She jumped back when several large moths flew out.
Rapunzel peered in, and then backed up quickly when someone emerged from the darkness. “Um, hi!” She said nervously. “I’m Rapunzel-”
“I’m Lance.” Lance said unhelpfully, and Cassandra shushed him.
“And I am looking for the-” Rapunzel continued, but paused when the person stepped out.
It was a very short woman, with thick glasses and her red hair pulled back in a hairstyle that could only be described as ‘librarian-esque’. “Keeper of the Spire?” She asked, smiling widely. “Look not further! I am the-” She coughed suddenly, nearly doubling over. After a moment, she looked up, embarrassed. “Swallowed a moth. Again. Whoops.”
She came down the steps. “Let me start over. I am the Keeper of the Spire!” She said, coming to a stop right in front of the group. “But you can call me Calliope.”
Eileen looked down at the tiny woman, and wondered how she managed to reach the tabletop.
*** *** ***
“So what can the Keeper do for you?” Calliope asked good naturedly.
“Actually,” Rapunzel said. “I heard you might be able to help me-”
“As Keeper of the Spire, I have been entrusted wardship over the Spire’s artifacts.” She interrupted. She frowned when she saw Lance examining a pair of colorful binoculars, and took them from him, putting them back in their rightful position.
“It is my sworn duty to prevent these items from falling into the wrong hands,” Calliope said. And protect them from the outside world. Or in some cases-” She looked back dramatically. “Protect the outside world from them!”
She smiled, leaning on a pedestal. “So I’m kinda prestigious.”
“Oh!” Rapunzel said, looking unsure. “Wow! That’s impressive...so I heard you could help me get the third piece of a scroll.” She started rooting around in her bag.
“What scroll?” Calliope asked. “There’s the scroll of Danbury, the Paval scroll, the scroll of Tannieger-which technically isn’t a scroll, believe it or not, more of a brochure.”
“This one.” Rapunzel said, pulling out the two pieces.
“That’s a scroll, alright,” Calliope said. “That one’s in the Spire’s Vault.”
“Great!” Rapunzel smiled. “So where is the Spire’s Vault?”
“I will take you there!” Calliope grinned widely, rushing off, only to keel over coughing again. “Ah! Another moth! Don’t worry!”
Pascal looked doubtful, and Eileen felt about the same.
Calliope led them into a cramped room, covered wall to wall in books. It looked disorganized, books stacked precariously on top of each other, each one bearing wear and tears and the scars of years of dog-earing. “This is the library,” Calliope said. “And yes. I’ve read all these books. If you’re wondering.”
Eileen wasn’t, but Rapunzel had already pulled her aside and asked her nicely to refrain from comments such as that.
“I just have to grab the vault’s map,” Calliope said, and dove into a box filled with papers. “The Spire’s Vault holds some of the rarest, most abstruse artifacts from all over the world.”
She gasped, suddenly becoming distracted and wandering over to a hook on the wall that held two metal rings locked together. “I noticed you were eyeing my linking rings,” She told Rapunzel. “I am something of a master illusionist!”
She yanked the rings off the wall, throwing them to the ground. They gave off a puff of smoke, and then it disappeared, the rings were gone. “Tada!” Calliope said, raising her arms, not seeming the notice the concealed rings slip out of her sleeve.
Rapunzel clapped politely, and Calliope grinned. “Did I hear someone say encore?”
“Definitely not.” Cassandra said, and Rapunzel elbowed her, apparently not having expected to tell Cass to keep a lid on it.
“It’s just one more trick,” Rapunzel said. “What’s the harm?”
*** *** ***
When the sun was close to setting, Eileen considered jumping out the window. She knew how to do so in a way that the glass didn’t hurt her much, and broken legs seemed much preferable to more bad magic tricks.
“And for my next trick-” Calliope said, and Eileen snapped.
“No more tricks!” She said, a small plea escaping her voice.
Calliope looked hurt, and Eileen coughed. “I mean...no more tricks, because these tricks blew my mind,” She said, nudging Lance, who had fallen asleep on the floor. “We all need time to process these illusions!” She grabbed Rapunzel’s arm, starting to haul her up.
“Yes!” Cassandra said, grabbing Rapunzel’s other arm. “In fact, Rapunzel, will you join us in processing outside?”
Rapunzel frowned, but followed them outside, where Cassandra immediately rounded on her with a murderous look. “Make her give us the scroll and let’s get out of here,” Cassandra said. “She’s the most annoying person I’ve ever met, and I’ve had to put up with Ellie and Lance! Together! At the same damn time!”
Lance frowned, but Eileen sighed. “Cass, relax. Now, I know Calliope is insanely irritating, but look at who we’re talking to!” Eileen smiled. “Rapunzel doesn’t know how to get annoyed with people.”
Eileen glanced at Rapunzel and frowned at the princess’ facial expression, which could only be described as fractured. “Christ.” She said.
“She’s not annoying!” Rapunzel said, lying through her teeth. “She’s just...different. Besides, it doesn't matter what I think. She’s gonna give us the scroll soon, and we will be on our way!”
“Okay, we’re all set!” Calliope called down from the window above. “I can get you that third piece.”
“Great!” Rapunzel said, looking relieved. “So where’s-”
“Bon soir!!” Calliope said, walking away from the window.
“Wait, what?” Rapunzel asked.
“It’s French,” Calliope said. “It means, ‘I’m off to bed’.”
“But I thought you were gonna get the scroll from the vault.” Rapunzel said.
“Oh no, silly!” Calliope laughed. “It’s at the top of the mountain in a vault called the Spire.” She pointed up the steep cliff, the craggy peak pointed like a spearhead towards the sky, scraping the clouds.
“It’s a full day climb,” Calliope said. “I’ll need a good night’s rest before I take that on. Hence, bon soir!” She shut the window, and Cassandra’s hand started to crawl to her sword.
Eileen pushed her hand down. “Not yet. Witnesses.”
“Okay!” Rapunzel said. “I guess we’ll just...camp here! Without a wagon or tent!”
“You can say she’s the worst,” Eileen said. “We won’t tell anyone.”
“She’s not the worst.” Rapunzel said, and a loud clap of thunder split her train of thought, and rain started to pour down in buckets.
“Hm,” Eileen said. “How about now?”
*** *** ***
Eileen supposed she could consider herself lucky that the climb wasn’t arm intensive. That would have been difficult in the brace. It was mostly steep walking uphill, which was unpleasant, but not the worst thing that had happened to her on the trip.
Calliope’s constant chattering, on the other hand…
“Come on!” The tiny woman said cheerfully. “Like this! Left, right, left, right!” She seemed to think they needed a demonstration in walking. Eileen bit back a slew of curses, and it left a bitter taste in her mouth. She glanced over to Cassandra and Lance, and it looked like they were fighting the same battle.
“If we’re gonna get to the top of that Spire, we need to pick up the pace!” Calliope said. “Let’s go, we’re burning daylight people!”
“Just a little push,” Cassandra muttered. “No one would know.”
Rapunzel glared at her. “We’d know!”
“I wouldn’t say anything.” Eileen said.
“You guys go ahead,” Lance panted. “I’m gonna stay here for a while.”
“Come on guys!” Rapunzel said. “It’s a new day! Give Calliope a chance.”
“Let’s go, maggots!” Calliope’s voice echoed, and Eileen clenched her good hand into a fist.
Rapunzel chuckled nervously, turning to go, but Eileen saw her face fall into a scowl when she thought no one was looking. She rushed ahead to her. “Look, Blondie, why don’t you hang at the back of the group? Cass and I can be your irritation buffer,” She grinned at Cassandra. “We’ve got more experience being annoyed with people.”
“I have experience being annoyed with you.” Cassandra corrected.
“And I, with you,” Eileen said. “Look at us, just two people who can’t stand each other. It’s almost magical.”
“For the last time,” Rapunzel said. “I’m not annoyed with her! I’m just getting to know her! Because I’m sure behind her eccentric, somewhat pretentious, clearly inconsiderate know-it-all, thinks she’s so much better than everyone exterior, there has to be a shred of human decency, right?” She started marching up the stairs, and Pascal reached out to Eileen as if begging for her to save him. She winced, genuinely feeling sorry for the poor lizard.
“But I am not annoyed with her!” Rapunzel declared.
“Hold on, hold on, princess,” Lance said. “I think I have something that might help.”
He reached into his jacket and pulled out a sock filled with sand, a button and thread face sewed messily onto it. “This is Socky,” Lance said. “Whenever I’m feeling stressed, like if Eileen if doing something dumb and impulsive-”
“Hey, I already have Cassandra on my ass-”
“-I just squeeze old Socky, and boom! Cool as a cucumber.” He dropped the sock toy into Rapunzel’s hands.
Rapunzel tilted her head. “Does it really work?”
“It’s why you see this easy and free spirit standing before you today,” He said. “Despite Eileen’s best efforts.”
“I could push you off this mountain.” Eileen said.
Lance chuckled. “With what? One hand?”
“Thank you, Lance,” Rapunzel said. “But I don’t think I’m gonna need this.”
“Where’s my hustle, people?!” Calliope’s voice rang out.
Lance and Cassandra sighed, plodding ahead. Eileen elbowed Rapunzel. “You might need it.”
*** *** ***
Rapunzel whacked away plants with Cassandra’s sword, but Calliope tsked. “You’re doing it wrong.” She said, and rushed up, grabbing the sword.
When she raised it, it slipped out of her hand, flying over the mountainside. “My sword!” Cassandra shouted, lunging for it uselessly.
Cassandra turned, face in a purely murderous expression, and Eileen stepped away, not wanting to be anywhere near Cassandra when her face looked like that.
“Rapunzel’s palm made it sweaty.” Calliope said, and Eileen saw Rapunzel squeezing Socky. The stress toy was going to look much worse for wear after this journey.
*** *** ***
Eileen’s foot slipped, and she slid down a few inches before managing to right her grip of Rapunzel’s hair. “Watch it up there!” Calliope said, brushing rocks out of her face.
“It’s a bit difficult with only one arm.” Eileen said.
Calliope sighed, as if Eileen was a small child throwing a tantrum over an easily solvable problem. “Well, perhaps you should have been more careful with your arms then! Otherwise you wouldn’t have injured yourself. I take it by the placement of the hard brace you’ve fractured your Colles bone?”
Eileen grit her teeth, pulling herself up, now even more understanding of why Cassandra’s fingers had itched for a sword. “Please tell me we’re almost to the top.” Rapunzel said, and Eileen went over to help pull her up.
“Nearly!” Calliope said. “Four more hours to go!”
“Hand me the sock after the lizard’s done with it,” Eileen whispered, seeing Pascal squeezing Socky. “I need a turn or I’m going to commit homicide. And I know Cass will help me.”
*** *** ***
“Wait wait!” Rapunzel said when they came to a chunk of land covered in orange plants. “That looks like poison elm. We should probably go around.”
“I’m sure if there was poison elm on this Spire, I’d know.” Calliope said.
Lance, unfortunately, had already rushed ahead, and was now dashing out with an ugly looking rash, itching himself frantically.
Calliope pursed her lips, and then sighed. “Can we just go around it like I suggested?” She asked.
Rapunzel broke the toy this time, and sand spilled out. Lance gasped, looking heartbroken. Rapunzel winced. “Sorry…”
*** *** ***
“There has to be a safer way up this thing.” Lance said, edging along the cliff face.
There was a distant roar, and Lance stepped back quickly in surprise. His foot slipped, and Rapunzel just barely managed to grab him before he tumbled off the cliff.
“What was that thing?” Eileen asked.
“I don’t know, but I don’t want to run into it.” Lance said.
“Almost there!” Rapunzel said, sounding like she was convincing herself.
“Calliope?” She asked, noticing the tiny woman had stopped. “Is something wrong?”
“No! No,” She said. “I just, um....” She mumbled something, but Cassandra suddenly stiffed.
“What was that?” Rapunzel asked.
“I said this is the wrong way.” Calliope said.
“You-this is the wrong fucking way?!” Cassandra snapped.
“There’s no need for that kind of language-” Calliope scolded.
“Oh, there definitely is.” Eileen said.
“-and anyway,” Calliope said, pretending not to have heard Eileen. “It wasn’t my fault. There-”
She was cut off by a loud roar, this time much closer. “What the hell is that?!” Eileen asked, whirling around.
“It’s real!” Calliope cried. “The Protector of the Spire! The Kirlok!”
A massive, clawed paw appeared around the corner, and Rapunzel looked back. “Uh, Calliope? What do we do?!”
“Kirlok…” She whimpered.
The biggest bear Eileen had ever seen in her life rounded the corner, and stood on its hind legs. It was easily fifteen feet tall, the curling ram horns on its head adding an extra foot. “Shit!” Eileen cried, stumbling back. “Run!”
They started sprinting, Rapunzel having to carry Calliope because the woman was too damn busy screaming. “GO AWAY!” Calliope yelled at the Kirlok.
“I don’t think he’s listening!” Rapunzel said helplessly.
“There!” Eileen pointed ahead to a cave with a tiny opening, and they ducked in just as the beast rammed it’s body into the entrance, roaring fiercely, drool dripping from its mouth.
Eileen let out a breath, only to tense up again when Calliope chuckled. “That was a close one, right guys?”
“What the hell was that thing?!” Cassandra demanded.
“The Kirlok. I mentioned that,” Calliope tsked. “You have to pay attention.”
Cassandra stared at her as if she simply could not believe this. Calliope coughed. “Ah, the Keeper of the Spire needs to...uh, recollect her thoughts and strategize our next move.”
Cassandra motioned Eileen and Rapunzel into a group huddle. “We have to get rid of her,” She growled. “She has no idea what she’s doing!”
“Cass, we can’t,” Rapunzel said. “We need her to get into the vault! Calliope has gotten us this far!”
“Shorty could’ve gotten us this far!” Cass said. “And he probably wouldn’t have thrown my sword over the cliff!”
There was a loud crash, and the three jumped, turning to see that a large stone pillar had fallen, opening up the cave ceiling, allowing sunlight to stream in. Lance dusted himself off, apparently responsible. “Lance, you’ve done it again!” He praised himself.
“Hell yeah!” Eileen grinned, relieved, rushing over to scrambling up the leaning stone pillar.
“Ah, well,” Lance said. “I just put my back into it, you know.”
“Oh, great!” Calliope said. “Looks like I found a way out of here!”
Eileen watched Rapunzel grit her teeth and take a deep breath. Pascal squeaked something that was probably a swear in lizard language.
Rapunzel poked her head out of the top, looked around, and smiled. “Guys, I think we made it to the top!”
“It is?!” Calliope asked, practically shoving Rapunzel aside to look out. “I mean...of course it is. And I got us here.”
“Yeah,” Rapunzel said. “You sure did.”
Eileen elbowed Lance. “Half of me wants her to crack, but the other half really doesn’t want to be around if she does.”
“Maybe if we could watch a safe distance away…” Lance mused, and Eileen laughed.
*** *** ***
The Spire pointed straight up, the outside a funny blue sheen that reminded Eileen of an abalone shell. Clouds scraped the top of it, and there was an odd chill in the air. The massive, crystalline door to the Spire and its vaults stood in front of them, intricate white designs climbing across the doorframe like vines.
“Let me just find that key…” Calliope said, pulling out a key ring with at least two dozen identical keys on it. “And we can get you that scroll.”
She stuck a key into the lock, wiggled it, and sighed. “It’s never the first one you try.” She muttered.
“Or second...or third…” She said, trying two more keys. “Oh, these must have gotten rearranged when I was fending off the Kirlock.”
Rapunzel spotted something on the ground, and paused. “Speaking of the Kirlock…” She said slowly, following a set of massive, bear-like footprints.
Eileen pushed some bushes aside and winced. “Oh, dammit.”
There were more pawprints, each one enunciated by a big claw on each toe. There were hundreds of scattered, chewed on bones scattered across the clearing, and there was a cave filled with dead grass, arranged in a kind of massive bed. It smelled like rot, and Eileen wrinkled her nose.
“I think this is it’s home.” Rapunzel said, wincing when there was a sudden, angry roar.
“You think?!” Cassandra said.
The Kirlock emerged from around the corner, eyeing the group with savage fury. “Calliope!” Eileen shouted, scrambling back to the door. “Now would be a great time to get that door open!”
“I’m trying!” Calliope shouted.
The Kirlock charged, and Cassandra grabbed Calliope, and for a second Eileen thought she was going to throw the tiny woman as a sacrifice, which she wouldn’t have argued with. Instead, Cassandra merely shook her. “Open the door!”
“I don’t know which is the right key!” Calliope yelped.
“LOOK OUT!” Rapunzel lunged forward, pushing Cassandra and Calliope out of the way right as the Kirlock slammed into the door. Eileen and Lance fell back, and Eileen drew her knife, though she had no idea what it would do against the creature.
The Kirlock tried to turn around, but growled in irritation. It’s horn had become wedged between the doors, and it was stuck.
Eileen breathed a sigh of relief, and then saw Rapunzel’s face. She backed up several steps.
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON’T KNOW WHICH IS THE RIGHT KEY?!” The princess demanded. “YOU’RE THE KEEPER OF THE SPIRE!”
“Because I’m…” Calliope bit her lip. “Not...the real Keeper of the Spire…”
Eileen’s eyes widened, and she glanced at Lance. They both took a few more steps back.
“Are you…” Rapunzel clenched her fists. “Are you kidding me?! What are you talking about?!”
The Kirlock managed to free itself, and turned to Cassandra, Rapunzel, and Calliope, growling. “Uh, Rapunzel-” Eileen started, but Rapunzel turned her glare on her.
“Stay out of this, Eileen!” She snapped.
“Watch it!” Cassandra shouted, grabbing the princess and the false Keeper. Eileen and Lance took off with them.
“How in the hell is it so fast?!” Eileen demanded, watching the Kirlock easily close the distance between them.
“The trees!” Rapunzel shouted.
Eileen turned, starting to climb the tree. Lance and Cassandra easily out climbed her, and when she reached for another branch, her foot slipped. She yelped, starting to fall, the Kirlock leaping for her-
Lance just barely managed to grab her arm, pulling her up.
“T-thanks.” Eileen panted, hugging the tree limb.
“Do you see what I mean about you stressing me out?” Lance asked, staring at the Kirlock.
“That was hardly my fault, my wrist is messed up.” Eileen argued, her heart sinking when she saw the Kirlock turned, racing after Rapunzel and Calliope.
Rapunzel threw her hair, grabbing Calliope and managing to swing up high in the tree. The Kirlock roared, and then started hitting its head against the tree in an attempt to knock it down. The tree shuddered.
Eileen winced, but after a few times, the Kirlock snarled, stalking off into the woods.
Eileen waited a few minutes, and then made her way down to the ground. When the monster didn’t reappear, she rushed over to where Rapunzel and Calliope were.
“I still have one key I haven’t tried!” Calliope was saying.
“That’s awesome!” Eileen shouted up. “Now let’s go open the damn door before that thing comes back!”
Of course, the second they got near the door, the Kirlock appeared, diving in front of the door. They sprinted back, but the Kirlock remained by the door, a vigilant guard.
“We have to lure it away.” Cassandra said.
“Any ideas?” Rapunzel asked.
“Don’t look at me,” Calliope said. “I’m just a failed magician. If it doesn’t involve flash, panache, or sleight of hand, then I’m pretty much…” She trailed off, and then perked up. “Wait...guys, I think I have an idea.” She pulled out a long string of colorful scarves.
“Oh great,” Eileen said before she could stop herself. “More magic.”
*** *** ***
Smoke drifted lazily from the ground, curling towards the Kirlock, and the beast snorted.
“Kirlock, Protector of the Spire!” Calliope shouted. “It is I, Calliope! The, uh, Apprentice of the Keeper of the Spire!”
Pascal fanned the flames so the smoke could continue to grow, squeaking when a bit blew back onto him.
Calliope looked nervous, but Rapunzel gave her a thumbs up, and Calliope nodded. “And do you know what time it is?” She called. She stepped out, and extended her palm. “Time to wonder!” A weak sparkle flew out of her palm, and she gulped.
The Kirlock snorted, stepping forward. He seemed unimpressed.
Calliope yelped, holding up her arms, and a stream of cards flew out from her sleeve, hitting the beast in the face. It snarled, stepping back, and Calliope shoved a small tube into its mouth, which popped loudly to reveal a bouquet of flowers.
The Kirlock blinked, apparently not having expected that, and Calliope threw smoke beads to the ground. They popped loudly, creating an opening for her to start running. The Kirlock roared, furious at the humiliation, and began to chase Calliope into the forest.
“Now!” Rapunzel yelled, swinging down and snatching Calliope just as the Kirlock was about to grab her. Eileen and Cassandra pulled Rapunzel’s remaining hair into a tripwire, and the Kirlock went flying over the edge of a cliff, and disappeared with a loud roar.
“Nice job facing the Kirlock,” Rapunzel told Calliope. “And those tricks weren’t bad either.”
“There’s more where that came from-” Calliope said, but Rapunzel laughed nervously.
“Maybe later! We have a scroll to find.” She said.
*** *** ***
“We went through a lot of trouble for this.” Rapunzel said, holding the piece of scroll. She still hadn’t opened it.
“It better be one amazing scroll.” Lance said, kneeling next to her. The campfire crackled merrily, seemingly indifferent to the nervous energy of the group.
Rapunzel took a breath, and unwrapped the fragment.
“It’s a guy in a hood.” Eileen said.
And it was, surrounded by yet more indecipherable writing. She scowled. “We had to deal with Calliope for that?!”
“She’s not so bad.” Rapunzel said, and to Eileen’s surprise, she saw that she meant it this time.
“Who do you think he is?” Cassandra asked.
“I don’t know.” Rapunzel said, staring at the picture intently. The man’s face was partially hidden, but his eyes held a malice that sent a shiver down Eileen’s spine.
“But I have a feeling we’re going to find out.” She said.
Notes:
next chapter is gonna be super angsty but also super funny and also very gay im excited
Chapter 6: Exes and Eyes
Notes:
* brave as a noun by ajj begins to play ominously in the distance*
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“The hamlet of Pincosta!” Rapunzel said cheerfully, gesturing out into the city. “Known for it’s warm smiles, hearty handshakes, and famous Pincostan Pecan Pie!”
“What’d you do? Memorize the travel guide?” Cassandra deadpanned.
“Only through the V’s,” Rapunzel said cheerfully. “That’s why I wasn’t very much help in Zuhlberg.”
“Do we have to go to the Hamlet of Pincosta?” Eileen asked. “What’s a hamlet, anyway? Sounds dumb.”
Cassandra and Rapunzel glanced at each other.
“We should take the scenic route. Rapunzel loves scenery, and it’s starting to grow on me too.” She smiled widely.
“Eileen,” Rapunzel said. “Are you wanted here?”
“Very much so, yes.” Eileen said.
Cassandra laughed. “I’m amazed you made it this far without being grabbed. What’d you do here, set a castle on fire?”
“Arson’s not really my style, actually,” Eileen said breezily. “Too messy. You get caught easily.”
“I don’t know if I like how much thought you’ve put into this.” Cassandra said.
“We have to go, Eileen,” Rapunzel said. “We’re out of food.”
She made a face, following them in town, sticking close to Maximus and ducking near him whenever someone passed by. And it was a crowded street, so she spent most of her time huddled near the annoyed horse.
“You know, on second thought,” Eileen said. “Maybe I should go back to the wagon.”
“Don’t worry, Eileen,” Rapunzel looked back and smiled. “These people have probably long forgotten-”
“FLYNN RIDER!” Someone shouted.
“Fuck.” Eileen said.
*** *** ***
“Five minutes in town and she’s already been arrested.” Cassandra said, giving Eileen a less than impressed look from the otherside of the jail cell.
“That’s a new record.” Lance said.
“Are you-” Eileen blinked at him. “Are you eating pie right now?!”
“I’m hungry.” Lance said, taking another bite of his pie slice.
Eileen was quiet. “Can...can I have some?”
“Pie’s for people who aren’t in jail.” Cassandra said.
Eileen scowled. “You can’t just make shit up.”
“Alright, where is she?!” A tiny man in a tall hat scurried into the dungeon hall, looking far too excited. He laughed when he saw Eileen. “Well, hello, Flynn Rider! Long time, no see!”
“Hey.” Eileen said, not entirely sure how to respond.
“Constable Flumph, is it?” Rapunzel asked.
“Wait, wait, don’t ruin my moment!” Flumph snapped. He snatched the key from the guard, and stood on his tiptoes, trying to reach the keyhole. Eileen thought she was doing well keeping her face neutral, but then she caught Cassandra’s eye, saw she was also fighting a smile, and the two started snickering.
“What’s so funny?!” Flumph demanded.
“N-nothing,” Eileen said. “Just, uh, thinking about a joke I heard earlier.”
Rapunzel elbowed Cassandra.
“Lewis,” Flumph said, and the guard gently picked Flumph up, and the tiny man stuck the key into the keyhole, locking it. “Oh, yeah!” He said.
“I’ve been waiting so long to do that,” He told the group. “Let me do it again.” The guard patiently held him out to the lock again, and Flumph giggled as he locked and unlocked the cell.
“Great, okay,” Rapunzel said, looking impatient. “Back to the charges?”
“This woman walked away with the town’s most sacred treasure,” Flumph said. “The Eye of Pincosta. Which is-”
“The biggest diamond in all the land,” Rapunzel said, sounding pleased with herself. “Yeah, I know. I read the travel guide.”
“Second biggest, actually,” Flumph said. “Zuhlberg’s is bigger.”
Rapunzel scowled. “Zuhlberg.”
“Okay, yeah, I stole the Eye,” Eileen said, smiling to herself when the door to the cell swung open after only a few minutes of lock-picking. “But that was forever ago. I’m a changed woman!”
The Constable scowled, and Eileen frowned, coughing. “I-I know I did just pick your lock, it’s kind of a bad habit…but you know, the fact I did it with one good hand is kind of impressive.”
They didn’t take chances the second time, using a tight, smelly straitjacket that Eileen didn’t want to think too hard about where they dragged it up from, and strapping her to a long board so she couldn’t walk around. “This is excessive,” She said, trying to shift herself unsuccessfully. “I’m not gonna eat anyone.”
“Under Pincosta law,” Flumph said. “I sentence Flynn Rider to be executed via hanging-”
“Wait wait, what the fuck?!” Eileen said. “Seriously?!”
“It would have been less,” Flumph said. “Had you not burned down half my city while escaping!”
“Thought you said you weren’t an arsonist, Ellie.” Cassandra said.
“And there’s a reason for that!” Eileen snapped. She glanced to Flumph. “Can’t I like...do community service or something? I’m fine with picking up litter or whatever.”
“Don’t worry, Eileen,” Lance whispered loudly to her. “We’ll break you out of here in no time.”
Flumph cleared his throat, glaring.
“Ha!” Eileen said loudly. “You’re so funny Lance! Because we all know you wouldn’t do that, and you especially wouldn’t discuss escape in front of the people we’re trying to escape from, because that’s a really bad idea!”
“Right!” Lance said. “I’m joking. Totally won’t break you out of here!”
He winked at Eileen, and she sighed deeply.
That was how, of course, they all ended up cramped in the tiny jail cell. “We need to discuss your subtly.” Eileen grumbled.
“Constable, wait!” Rapunzel said. “What if I could find the Eye?”
Flumph paused, looking thoughtful. “How?”
“Let me worry about that,” Rapunzel said. “If I can find it, would you let Eileen go?”
“And everybody else?” Cassandra said.
Flumph was quiet, deep in thought. For an awful moment, Eileen thought he was going to laugh at her and walk off, but he snapped, and the guard opened the jail cell long enough for Rapunzel to duck out. “Rapunzel, this is a really bad idea.” Eileen said.
“I’m not letting you go to the noose.” Rapunzel said, face set and determined.
“The executioner gets back from vacation in two days.” Flumph said.
“Vacation?” Eileen asked incredulously. Flumph glared at her for the interruption, and she coughed. “Sorry, just...kind of hard to picture. Continue.”
“And then after that, your friends will stay here.” Flumph continued, and Eileen felt a small bit of relief that at least she hadn’t doomed the rest of them to death. Even if living out the rest of their days in a dinky cell wasn’t much better. “So that jewel better be in my hand in forty eight hours.”
He turned on his heels, marching out of the dungeon grandly, his guards trailing behind him. Rapunzel grabbed the bars of the cell, looking stressed.
“If I’m gonna track the Eye down, I need you to tell me everything.” Rapunzel said seriously, staring Eileen dead in the eye.
Eileen winced, looking sheepish. “We-we-well, I took it when I was still with, you know, Stalyan,” She made a face. “We stole it, and then when Lance and I ran, I took it with me. You know, for insurance.”
“And then someone else stole it,” Lance said sadly. “And it was so shiny.”
Eileen was quiet, and Rapunzel raised her eyebrows. “Eileen? It was stolen from you?”
Eileen didn’t say anything.
“Eileen-wait, it wasn’t?! What happened?!” Lance asked. “You said someone snatched it, and we would never find it again!”
“Someone...did snatch it. Kind of,” Eileen said quietly. “Though I have a pretty good idea about who took it.”
“Who-” Lance’s face fell. “Oh my God. Please tell me you’re kidding.”
“Sorry.” Eileen said.
“Wait, who is this? Who are we talking about?” Cassandra asked.
Eileen sighed, looking for a moment like she was contemplating letting herself get hung as opposed to revealing the thief. “Her...her name is Marie de Farro.”
She leaned in close, red-faced. “My ex-girlfriend.”
“WHAT?!” Rapunzel yelped, unable to conceal her surprise. “Your-oh my God!”
“You don’t need to act so shocked about it.” Eileen grumbled.
“Sorry, I just...oh my God!” Rapunzel said.
“Damn, Ellie,” Cassandra sounded amazed. “You actually got someone to stand you?”
“And then let them steal the Eye!” Lance said mournfully.
“Yeah, let’s all get on my ass about it, shall we?!” Eileen snapped.
Rapunzel leaned in close. “Where is she?”
“That’s the thing,” Eileen said. “She’s kind of an adventurer. That’s her whole thing. Her family is old money, so she doesn’t really need to steal and stuff. She’s in it for the thrill. She’s always off somewhere, doing something crazy. And a little deadly.”
“Sounds like a keeper.” Cassandra said blandly.
“Can you shut up? Just for a second? Please?” Eileen said.
“Do you have any idea where she might be?” Rapunzel asked. “Any at all?”
Eileen paused, thinking. “Whenever she’s in this area, she stops in at this bar called the Glass Slipper. It’s not far from here, actually. If she’s anywhere around, she’ll be there. If not…” Eileen pursed her lips. “She could be on the moon, for all I know. She said she always wanted to visit it.”
“Did she...did you two love each other?” Rapunzel asked, voice low.
Eileen paused, looking like she wanted to shut this line of questioning down, and then sighed, mulling the question over. “I...yeah. I did, anyway. Then, that is. I think she did too. But she was good at acting.” She frowned.
Rapunzel nodded. “I’ll get you out of there. I promise.”
“It’s not up to you, Blondie,” Eileen said grimly. “It’s up to Marie.”
*** *** ***
The pub was a dump.
An old, battered dart board hung on the wall, and dirty glasses lay strewn and discarded among the tables. Rapunzel wrinkled her nose, suddenly wishing she had shoes.
For a second, Rapunzel felt panicked, suddenly realizing that if she couldn’t find Marie here, she was probably done for. There were no leads on her whereabouts, and Rapunzel didn’t have time to go searching.
Pascal chittered from her shoulder, tugging her hair and pointing at the bar.
There was a woman sitting at the bar, throwing back shots with ease. She had light chestnut colored hair cut in a ragged bob, and wore a long black coat with brass buckles. Freckles covered nearly every square inch of her face, and her eyes were the color of storm clouds on the horizon. She had on oversized black boots, and a gold piercing on the left side of her nose. A long, curved dagger with the initials MVDF hung at her waist.
It stands for Marie Viola de Farro, Eileen had said. She doesn’t even have a middle name, she just likes the sound of Viola. She’s a literature fan, and she said it’s from some play. I don’t remember the name of it.
Rapunzel sat next to her, unsure how to proceed. Marie eyed her, and then waved down the bartender for more shots. “Marie?” Rapunzel asked. “Marie de Farro?” She smelled like cinnamon, oddly.
Marie raised an eyebrow. “Sorry, do I know you from somewhere?”
“No, but you know my friend,” Rapunzel said, watching as the woman threw back a shot. “Eileen Fitzherbert.”
Marie smiled. “Sorry, sweetheart. Doesn’t ring a bell.” She swished the liquor around in another glass, tipping it to her lips.
“You-oh. Right. Flynn Rider.” Rapunzel said, and Marie choked, spewing liquor across the counter.
The bartender glared at her, and Marie glared back. “Oh, piss off,” She snapped at him, and wiped her mouth. “Yeah, so I know Fl-Rider. I know her. What about it?”
“I know about...you know. You two.” Rapunzel said, and Marie looked stricken for a moment before pulling out the initialed dagger. Suddenly the blade was at Rapunzel’s throat.
“Choose your next words carefully.” She hissed.
Rapunzel forced herself to stay calm. “I don’t care about that. But she’s in trouble.”
Marie looked surprised, but the dagger fell away from Rapunzel’s throat. “Yeah, well, Flynn’s always in trouble. Nothing new, is it?”
“She says she thinks you took the Eye of Pincosta. I need it back or Flynn will be hung for taking it.” Rapunzel said.
“Bold of you to assume I give a shit.” Marie said.
“You should! And all my other friends are in danger of being jailed for life!” Rapunzel said.
“Boohoo,” Marie said. “Flynn should have thought of that before going back to Pincosta. That idiot.”
“She’ll die.” Rapunzel said.
“We all die,” Marie said. “Flynn just has bad luck. Doesn’t surprise me, honestly.” She sighed. And then chuckled darkly. “Oh, I’ll bet she’s pissed about it. She always said she wanted to be guillotined.”
Rapunzel winced, and Marie laughed. “What, too morbid for you, sweetheart?”
“No,” Rapunzel lied. “Just...an odd thing to discuss.”
“Flynn talks a lot,” Marie said. “You might have noticed if you're her friend, as you claim to be.”
“I am her friend.” Rapunzel said defensively.
“No need to get yourself worked up over it,” Marie chuckled. “What, are you her new partner in crime now?”
“No,” Rapunzel said. “I’m the princess of Corona.”
Marie paused, looking thoughtful. “...yeah. I heard they found that lost princess. I missed a lot. Was in Asia for a while. What’s a princess doing running around with that no-good lying shithead? Get sick of the royal life?”
“No,” Rapunzel snapped, stung for Eileen. “She saved me. She turned herself around. Without her, I’d still be gone.”
Marie laughed, and then noticed Rapunzel’s expression. “Fuck, you’re serious?!” She pursed her lips, looking amused. “Flynn on the straight and narrow. Damn if that isn’t a plot twist.” She looked oddly wistful, hugging her coat closer to herself. “Damn.” She said again.
Rapunzel was quiet. “What...what made you fall in love with her?”
“It was hardly love.” Marie snapped.
“It had to have been something. She told me you two were happy together.” Rapunzel said.
Marie pursed her lips. “Did she now.” She said, tracing her finger along the cup. For a second, she looked nostalgic. “She…” Marie pursed her lips. “She was funny, I suppose. There was that. Adventurous, though that’s not uncommon among thieves, I guess. She…”
She sighed. “She was an absolute bitch. The dumbest person I’ve ever met in my life. She would talk your ear off about nothing, chattering on and on endlessly, but…” She sighed deeply. “She was...sweet. Caring. And she could be quite romantic when she tried.”
“Aw.” Rapunzel said, smiling.
“Wipe that grin off your face. It was a lifetime ago.” Marie snapped.
“Still,” Rapunzel said. “Are you just going to let her die?”
Marie was quiet, staring into the empty glass. Finally, she sighed, tossing a few coins onto the counter. “Oh, damn it all to hell.” She grumbled.
“Fine,” She snapped. “But she owes me big time for this.”
Rapunzel grinned. “Great! Where’s the Eye?”
“I don’t have it.” Marie shrugged.
“You-what?! You don’t have it?!” Rapunzel asked incredulously.
“Lost it on a bet years ago,” Marie stood up, brushing herself off. “I think I know who has it.”
“You think or you know?” Rapunzel asked.
“I think. And that’s all we have to go on, so…” Marie jerked her head, motioning for Rapunzel to follow her out. “If we wanna get the Eye back, we gotta get a move on.”
She went to where several horses had been tied up, and started loosening the knot on one of the reins. She looked shifty, and Rapunzel paused. “Is that your horse?”
“Of course not.” Marie said.
“Then who’s is it?!”
“HEY!” Marie and Rapunzel whirled around to see a mountain of a man glaring at them. “That’s my horse!”
“Now we know.” Marie said.
The man rushed forward, drawing a club, and Rapunzel jumped in front of him. “We were just admiring your lovely horse, right Marie?”
Marie blinked, her hand frozen on the hilt on her dagger. “Hey, has he been kind of out of sort?” Rapunzel asked.
The man paused, lowering his club. “He has been kinda ornery lately.”
“Of course!” Rapunzel smiled. “His saddle’s too loose, and it’s chafing his belly. And there’s a thorn in his bridle, ouch!” She reached up, plucking the imaginary thorn and tossing it aside. “Also, I wouldn’t hitch him next to rye grass. It’ll give him a tummy ache.”
The horse whinnied helpfully, though Rapunzel wasn’t sure if he genuinely appreciated her advice or was just playing along. “All right, you take care now!” She said, wandering back over to Marie. “Bye!”
She waited until they were a good distance away before chuckling. “You really think I’m the type of person to steal a horse?” Rapunzel asked.
“More so hoping you would just be quiet.” Marie said. She pulled out a canteen and took a long sip.
“Oh, can I have some? I’m parched.” Rapunzel said.
“Mhm.” Marie said, handing over the canteen with a mischievous smile. Rapunzel smiled, but paused when a sharp smell wafted up from the canteen.
“Weren’t you just drinking?” Rapunzel asked, handing it back with a frown.
“Well, now I want more. I’ll need it for dealing with you.” Marie said.
Rapunzel frowned, sliding down to a river bank to fill her frying pan up with water. “When you’re done pickling yourself, maybe you could tell me where the Eye is?”
“Virtuous St. Goodberry.” Marie said.
“Where’s that?”
“Not where, who. I lost the Eye to him years ago. If we want it, we gotta get it from Goodberry,” Marie finally clipped the canteen to her belt. “We should probably get moving. It’s a three day walk.”
“Three days?!” Rapunzel stood up. “Why didn’t you say that before, we have less than two to get the diamond!”
“It would be a lot quicker if we had horses, hm?” Marie asked.
“We’re not stealing. Anything.” Rapunzel paused, watching a leaf float down the river. She stood on top of a log, squinting into the distance. “Goodberry’s place is due east, right?”
Marie caught her eye and made a face. “Whatever you’re thinking right now is an awful idea.”
*** *** ***
Marie shrieked, trying to stay afloat the log in the rapidly, uselessly paddling with a stick. “I told you this was an awful idea!”
“I thought you were an adventurer!” Rapunzel said, and paused when a fork appeared in the river. “Go right!”
“We want the left!” Marie said, and stuck the stick in the water. They veered left before Rapunzel could argue.
“We needed to go right!” Rapunzel shouted.
“Wrong,” Marie said, turning to glare at her. “Your way had rocks!”
“Your way has that!” Rapunzel pointed ahead to where the river suddenly dipped down into a roaring waterfall. Pascal squeaked in alarm.
“When were you going to mention the waterfall?!” Marie asked.
“I was trying to, but you interrupted me!”
“This current is too strong.”
“We’re gonna have to go over,” Rapunzel nodded to herself. “We can do this!”
“Did I mention I hate you?!” Marie snapped, and the two went over the edge with a shriek-
And then stopped.
The log was perfectly balanced on a rock, tilting dangerously with every tiny movement. “This fucking sucks.” Marie grumbled.
“We made up a lot of time though, didn’t we?” Rapunzel asked.
“Yeah, this is great.” Marie said, standing up carefully. The log tilted, and her canteen fell from her belt, disappearing into the mist below.
“Stop!” Rapunzel said. “We have to jump off at the same time. Or we’re both going to fall.”
“Well, this is a great mess you’ve gotten us into.” Marie snapped.
“On three, ready?” Rapunzel steadied herself. “One...two...wait wait Marie-!”
Marie had decided she was done waiting, and jumped, landing on the cliff face at the edge of the waterfall. The log tilted back, and Rapunzel sprung to her feet, practically throwing herself at the rocks. She scrambled, and her fingers stung, but she managed not to fall.
“That was close.” Rapunzel panted.
Marie didn’t respond, starting to climb the rest of the way up, but her grip fell on loose soil, and she fell back with a shout. She just barely managed to catch herself on a tree branch, looking startled.
“Hang on!” Rapunzel called down to her, and loosened her hair. She lassoed it around a sturdy root above her, and rappelled down to Marie. Marie’s branch snapped, and she started to fall to the rocks below with a shriek-
Rapunzel grabbed her hand. “Gotcha!”
Marie didn’t say anything.
Rapunzel managed to get to the sandy bottom, picking up Marie’s canteen and handing it to her. The woman took it without a word, and paused when she saw large, colorful circus tents. “Goodberry’s tents,” She said softly. “I...I can’t believe it.”
Rapunzel grinned, pleased with herself. “What are we waiting for? Come on!”
*** *** ***
Two massive guards stood up when Marie and Rapunzel approached. “Closed,” He said in a gruff voice. “Unless you have a ticket. Or a bribe.” He held out his big meaty hand to her.
“Good evening to you too, sir!” Rapunzel shook it, unsure what else to do. “We just need to speak to Mr. Goodberry.”
The two moved closer together. “No tickets, no bribe, no deal.” The guard said again.
“We need to talk to Mr. Goodberry,” Marie said, voice harsh with a threat. “And you’re in the way. So get out of it.”
Immediately, the guards drew their swords.
“Woah woah, guys!” Rapunzel waved her arms. “I don’t want to have to pull out my frying pan, but I will.”
The guards looked at each other, not entirely seeming to know what to make of the two. Marie drew her dagger, and that seemed to be the signal for the two to advance.
Rapunzel drew her frying pan and easily blocked the blow. “Pascal?” She said, and Pascal squeaked, shooting his tongue out to the guard’s forehead. He gave a high pitched squeal, giving Rapunzel the opportunity to whack him hard. He fell to the ground.
Marie leaned back when she blocked the sword with her dagger, using the curved edge to twist the man’s sword, disarming him easily. Rapunzel rushed over, finishing the job with a solid blow to the back of the man’s head.
“Not...awful.” Marie said, almost complimenting her.
“Do you two have any promoters?!” An excited voice asked. Rapunzel glanced over to see a man with his hair done up in an almost pompadour like style, rushing over to them with a too-big grin on his face. A con smile, Eileen would have said.
Marie raised her dagger, and the man held his hands up to show his lack of malintent. “It’s not every day you meet fighters who can drop guards like bad habits.”
He smiled. “Name’s Goodberry, Virtuous St. Goodberry. Walk with me.” He started walking, and after a moment, Marie and Rapunzel followed.
“Now the best fighters in the world travel sea and land to come here,” Goodberry said, leading them over to a tent filled with raucous cheering. “At the grandeur of the Goodwill games!” He pulled the curtain aside so the two could peek in.
Two people were wrestling, throwing each other around like ragdolls with the crowd inside screaming insults or encouragement. Marie scoffed, unimpressed. Rapunzel swallowed her smile.
“Look, Mr. Goodberry, we’re not here to fight,” Rapunzel said. “We understand that you have the Eye of Pincosta and we need to return it to it’s rightful owners. Or a friend of ours is going to be in big trouble.”
“Friend of yours.” Marie corrected.
“Wait, I do know you!” Goodberry grinned widely. “Marie de Farro! Never thought I’d see you around these parts again!”
“Never hoped to come back.” Marie grumbled.
“Missing this?” He held out his hand, and on a ring, there was a massive diamond carved into the shape of an unblinking eye. It was blood red. “You lost it to me, fair and square, de Farro. No one likes a sore loser.”
Marie’s grip on her dagger tightened slightly, and Rapunzel stepped between the two. “We really, really need it back. Please.”
Goodberry chuckled. “Tough. If you’re not here to fight, scram! I’ve got fighters to tend to, after all. They’re the meanest, toughest, coolest, strongest-”
He was definitely a conman, anyone could see that, and Rapunzel vowed to bug Marie over her poor judgement of betting with him later. But as it was, the two fighters who had been at each other's throats seconds earlier walked out of the tent, each carrying a bag.
Goodberry’s rant fell off. “Where are you going?”
“We quit.” One of the fighters said.
“What?!” Goodberry rushed to block their path. “No no no, you can’t! The big fight’s tonight!”
“We’re not going up against Malice Marauder,” A fighter said. “We have families.” They turned and left before Goodberry could stop them.
“Well, shit,” Goodberry grumbled. “This is...ah…”
Suddenly, Rapunzel grinned. “What if we could fight your challenger?”
“‘We’?!” Marie asked.
“We’ll fight in the main event, and if we win, you give us the Eye of Pincosta.” Rapunzel said.
Goodberry paused, staring off at something that Rapunzel couldn’t see. “‘Malice Marauder versus the Maidens of Mayhem’.” He said, as if imagining a banner.
“I didn’t agree to this, and I don’t agree to that name.” Marie snapped.
“It’s a deal!” He grabbed Marie’s hand and shook it vigorously. “I’ll see you tonight!”
Marie gave a tight smile, and yanked her hand away. “Don’t touch me.”
“This is going to be a great show!” Goodberry said, rushing off.
Marie turned, and if looks could kill, Rapunzel would have been a goner.
*** *** ***
“We have no chance of beating Marauder,” Marie said, glaring at Rapunzel as she tried on different fighter masks. “You look ridiculous.”
Rapunzel didn’t answer, and Marie scowled. “Even if we’re better fighters-which we aren’t-Goodberry will rig the game so we lose. You’re going to get absolutely destroyed. You know that, right?”
Rapunzel smiled when Pascal squeaked in approval at her green mask. “We’ll just have to take Goodberry at his word.”
Marie sighed, coming up behind her. “You’ve got a lot to learn about the real world, Princess.”
Rapunzel frowned. “Just because I see the best in people doesn’t make me dumb.”
“What, like Flynn?” Marie asked.
“Eileen,” Rapunzel corrected. “And yes. I see the best in her, because she’s a good person and she’s one of my best friends.”
“Your loss, then.” Marie said, grabbing Rapunzel’s hands. Before the princess could react, Marie handcuffed her to the pole supporting the tent.
“Hey!” Rapunzel shouted, and Pascal lunged at her. She grabbed him, shoving him into a pot and turning it upside down.
“Sorry I can’t stick around to watch you get your ass kicked,” Marie said breezily. “Goodberry’s gonna be pissed when he finds this missing.” She held out the Eye, and it sparkled with an almost mocking beauty.
“You-” Rapunzel wriggled, but it was useless. She didn’t have Eileen’s lock prowess. “So you’re just going to let Eileen die?!”
“I didn’t march her up to the gallows,” Marie shrugged. “What happens to her is none of my business.”
“But you can save her!” Rapunzel cried.
“That’s neither here nor there.” Marie said, staring at the Eye with a greedy smile.
“Marie-” Rapunzel said, but Marie cut her off with a harsh glare.
“Don’t try and pull any mushy, maudlin shit with me, princess. I’ve moved on from her. And it was for the best,” She looked at Rapunzel sideways. “You don’t know much about her past, do you?”
“She...doesn’t like to talk about it, I don’t want to make her uncomfortable-” Rapunzel started, but Marie chuckled.
“She was-is-self-destructive. Self-destructive in the way that would burn the people up around her, so everyone was at arm’s length, even me. I told her I loved her all the time, and she could never once say it back. She spent more nights in jail than out, or would pick fights with men three times her size for no other reason other than she wanted too. She…” Marie sighed. “She was going to get herself killed, and drag down anyone who got too close to her.”
“But she’s not dead. She’s alright. She’s better.” Rapunzel argued, trying to pretend that this new information didn’t rattle her.
“So she’s open now? Doesn’t shut down a conversation if she doesn’t like the way it’s going? No more emotionally-empty vices or bullshit?” Marie asked, and chuckled when Rapunzel was quiet. “Face it, princess. She might go by a new name, she might not come back home blackout drunk with split knuckles, but she’s still the same, ruinous bitch who would probably rather die than see me anyway. I’ve met a lot of people, but I’ve never met anyone as empty as Flynn Rider.”
She turned to leave, and Rapunzel felt desperate. “She told me she loved you.”
Marie laughed. “Now you’re just lying to my face. Her saying we were happy together doesn’t mean she loved me.”
“She told me she loved you,” Rapunzel repeated. “And I know she’s...bad at emotions. But she shows her love in different ways. She’s not empty. And you know that.”
Marie frowned, and for a second, Rapunzel thought she might turn around.
“Take care, princess,” She said. “Try not to die, and don’t cry too much over Flynn. You probably saved yourself a lot of future heartbreak.”
*** *** ***
The crowd was not on Rapunzel’s side.
They booed her with almost frenzied excitement when she walked into the ring, and Pascal chittered nervously. She sighed, resisting the urge to bolt. She had already tried that, and it hadn’t gone well. If she could beat this Malice Marauder quickly, she might have a chance to catch up with Marie before she got too far.
A chance.
The crowd cheered as smoke poured out from the other side of the ring, and Rapunzel heard animal-like growling. She stepped back, nerves coiling in her body and-
Out stepped a tiny, troll-like woman, her scraggly hair tied back in a pink bow and her face squashed in as though she had been bashed with a rock multiple times. She growled again, and her teeth were few and far between.
“Oh,” Rapunzel said, barely daring to hope. “This isn’t too-”
As if unable to contain herself any longer, Malice jumped at Goodberry’s table, and he squealed and jumped out of the way. She tore it to shreds using her bare teeth and hands, and the crowd roared. “Hey! Stop! Do you want your money?!” Goodberry yelled.
Rapunzel gulped. “I...think we may be in over our heads, Pascal.” Pascal squeaked.
After reducing the table to splinters, Malice fixed her eyes on Rapunzel, and slowly climbed into the ring, snarling. A guard tossed Rapunzel her frying pan, and she snatched it up gratefully, though it hardly felt like a suitable defense in that moment.
Malice charged her, and Rapunzel swung her frying pan. But the woman was more agile than she looked, and easily plucked the pan from her grasp. The crowd roared, and Rapunzel felt nauseous when Malice bit into the cast-iron pan and ripped a chunk out as easily as if it were cotton candy.
Pascal squeaked, gesturing frantically to her hair. Rapunzel nodded, taking out a long loop and throwing it at Malice. But Malice saw it coming, and grabbed it, yanking Rapunzel and throwing her across the ring. She yelped.
The crowd screamed it’s approval, and Malice waved, cackling and basking in the attention. Rapunzel had a feeling this was going to end badly for her.
“Hey, Malice!”
Malice turned, and Rapunzel could scarcely believe her eyes. Marie de Farro stood easily at the opposite edge of the ring, hand on the hilt of her dagger, somehow managing to keep her bored expression. “Mind if I cut in?” Marie asked.
She walked forward casually, picking up the ragged remains of a frying pan. “Looks like you owe her a new frying pan.” She said, and Malice snarled.
“Marie!” Rapunzel said, smiling widely.
“Don’t make a big deal out of it.” Marie said.
Malice charged, and Rapunzel flung out her hair, pulling Marie up with it so she could kick Malice in the face. She did, and the troll woman flew back.
Malice recovered quickly, jumping out of the ring and to Goodberry. She pulled a red leather chair from him, ignoring his shouts of protests, and raised it over her head with a roar, standing on the rope edges. Rapunzel threw her hair, pulling the rope back and releasing it. Malice fell off roughly, and the chair splintered on top of her.
Malice grabbed a new table, the one holding the admission money, and coins fell to the floor. “What is it with her and furniture?” Rapunzel asked, mostly to herself.
She threw the table, and Marie and Rapunzel jumped onto it, barely managing to keep their balance as the table wobbled on the ropes of the ring. “This feels familiar.” Marie said.
“On three this time.” Rapunzel said, and Marie smiled.
“One…” Rapunzel said, watching Malice’s face pull back into a sneer.
“Two…” Malice roared like a lion, and charged.
“Three!” The two jumped, and Malice ran headfirst into the table. She stumbled back, looking dazed. She might have been able to recover, but the table fell back onto her, and she didn’t get back up.
A bell rang, and Goodberry climbed into the ring, looking shocked. “I don’t believe it…” He said, and then grinned. “Ladies and gentlemen, you are witnessing history! I present the new champions-” He gestured grandly to Rapunzel and Marie. “The gals with gall, the sisters with the twisters-”
“Okay, we’re leaving,” Marie said, and Goodberry’s face fell at his tangent being interrupted. “And keeping the Eye.” She held up the ring, and Goodberry’s eyes widened when he realized it was no longer on his finger.
“And your horses!” Rapunzel said, and then frowned guiltily. “Borrow, I mean, if that’s okay with you-”
“Princess.”
“Right, right. Leaving now!”
*** *** ***
“You lucked out on this one, Rider.” Flumph said, scowling at her as Eileen ducked out of the cell, looking relieved.
“Yeah, I know,” She said, rubbing her wrists. “Don’t worry, I won’t be coming back anytime soon.”
The Constable held up the Eye, looking pleased. “To the vault, men!” He commanded, and his guards marched off after him.
“Sorry you had to deal with Marie.” Eileen said to Rapunzel.
“Oh, she’s not so bad,” Rapunzel said. “We’ve met worse people. She’s just a little...rough.”
“Hm,” Eileen said. “Well, thanks anyways.”
“Let’s leave,” Lance said, already inside the wagon. “Before they change their minds.”
Eileen chuckled, turning to climb up into the front-
“Hey Eileen.”
Eileen froze, slowly turning to see Marie de Farro leaning against the city gate, an unreadable expression on her face. She had a frying pan in her hands, and spun it listlessly.
Eileen opened her mouth and closed it.
Marie held out the pan. “I think Rapunzel needs this.”
*** *** ***
“So…” Eileen said, trying to pretend like she didn’t wish she was anywhere but here. “How’ve...how’ve you been?”
Marie gave her a look, and Eileen sighed. “Christ, this is awkward.”
“Mhm,” Marie said, examining her nails. “Seems like you’ve done well for yourself.”
“I’m alright,” Eileen shrugged. “It’s nice not to worry about being arrested.”
“Most of the time.” Marie corrected.
“Most of the time, yeah.” Eileen smiled slightly.
“What happened to your hand?” Marie asked, nodding at the brace.
“Fell off a mountain,” Eileen shrugged, amused by Marie’s slightly shocked look. “It’s not even in the top ten of craziest things that have happened to me.”
Marie chuckled, and glanced at the others, gathered around the fire, chattering happily and aimlessly. “And...they really don’t care? About...you know, our past? And what it means?”
“Not even a little,” Eileen said, smiling wider. “I know, I was shocked too.”
“I think your princess friend wants us to get back together.” Marie said.
“Ah, Christ,” Eileen grimaced. “Don’t be mad at her, she means well, honestly-”
“No no,” Marie said, smiling. “It’s...sweet. Although a bit awkward…she just really cares about you. She wants you to be happy.” She trailed off for a second. “I’ve got a boyfriend now.”
Eileen blinked. “No shit?”
“Mhm. Edward.” Marie said. Eileen looked at her, trying to discern her thoughts, but her face was hidden by shadows.
“I mean...are you happy?” Eileen asked.
“Yeah,” Marie said. “I am. I’ll...always have a place for you in my heart, I think, but….I’ve moved on. I love him, and he loves me.”
“That’s sappy,” Eileen said, and Marie laughed. “I’m glad. I…” She caught sight of Rapunzel, who was teasing Cassandra about something with a big smile a few yards away in front of the campfire, and elbowed her lightly. “I moved on too.”
Eileen sighed. “I...I’m sorry. For...everything that happened between us. I was in a really bad place, but...I still hurt you. And you deserved better. You DO deserve better.”
“Rapunzel told me that you told her you loved me.” Marie said.
“I...said that, yeah.” Eileen said quietly.
“Did you mean it?” Marie asked.
Eileen took a breath. “Yeah,” She said quietly. “I did. And...and I’m sorry I couldn’t say it then.”
Marie was quiet, and then smiled. “I’ll see you around then?” She asked, offering her hand. Eileen was still for a moment.
“Yeah,” She said, reaching out and shaking Marie’s hand. “I guess I will.”
Marie smiled, and then turned, disappearing into the dusky shadows of the woods, almost as if she had never been there at all.
Eileen was still for a moment, and then rejoined the group.
Rapunzel frowned. “Where’s Marie?”
“She left,” Eileen shrugged. “She’s meeting her boyfriend apparently.”
“Boyfriend?” Rapunzel looked surprised. “So she...you can do that? Like, date both?”
“Mhm,” Eileen said, waving at Lance. “You got any pie left? I’m starving.”
She didn’t notice Rapunzel’s look of deep thought, as though something had just occurred to her.
Notes:
haha tricked you into reading an oc!!! she's a minor one but you know,,,
anyway anyone have any good mommy issues songs i can listen to because im going through it rn and class of 2013 by mitski isnt cutting it anymore tbh
Chapter 7: Fussing Over Scars (Part One)
Chapter Text
“That doesn’t make any sense,” Eileen said. “If the inside of the Great Tree is hollowed out, what does that have to do with going through the mountains?”
“I’m just repeating what Adira told me.” Rapunzel said.
“Hmph, if you say so.” Eileen shrugged. She handed Cassandra a box filled with supplies, relishing her newly healed wrist, free from the brace. “You know, I gotta say, when we’re not fighting horned bears, running into exes, and chasing monkeys, life on the road is kind of peaceful.”
“You have a funny definition of what peaceful is.” Cassandra said.
Eileen opened her mouth to argue, but the ground rumbled, as if an earthquake was creeping up on them. “Now look what you did.” Cassandra muttered.
“Me?!” In any other circumstance, Eileen probably would have shot back an insult, but someone came over the hillside behind them.
Eileen had never seen a rhinoceros before. She had seen a few paintings, but that hardly prepared her for the creature that climbed over the hillside, staring at them. It was more of a tank than an animal, and it was flanked by two furry creatures that seemed to be a cross between a bear and a cat, growling.
A man was mounted on top of the rhinoceros with wild dark hair, a scraggly beard, and a fur coat. His yellow-ish eyes stared at them with open malice, and Eileen knew instantly that he meant them harm. A lot of harm.
“What the fuck.” She croaked.
The rhinoceros bellowed, and charged.
“What the fuck!” Eileen shouted again, but jumped onto the wagon, grabbing Rapunzel’s hand to help her on before flicking the reins. “Go go go!”
Maximus and Fidella immediately shot off, galloping at full speed. “What’s going on?!” Lance shouted.
“Rhinoceros man!” Eileen yelped.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?!”
“Wow, a rhinoceros!” Rapunzel said, peeking out over the top of the wagon. “I never thought I’d actually see one! You know, if our lives weren’t on the line-”
“Please sit down!” Eileen squeaked, amazed that Rapunzel was still able to appreciate the exotic zoology even now.
“Yeah, right, sorry!” Rapunzel ducked down.
The rhino threw itself against the wagon, and it tilted dangerously. Eileen shrieked, just barely keeping herself from falling. “We can’t outrun it!” Cassandra said, and Rapunzel pursed her lips.
“Maybe we don’t have too.” She said, and took one of the sets of reins from Eileen.
She reached for one of the levers at the front of the wagon and glanced at Eileen, who smiled. “Oh, I see...good plan, Blondie.”
Rapunzel pushed the lever, and the wagon split in half, with Maximus, Lance, and Eileen on the left, and Rapunzel, Cassandra, and Fidella on the other. Eileen’s side wobbled, and for an awful second she thought they were going to flip, but Maximus managed to right himself and keep running.
She steered Maximus up a steep hill, and the two halves broke off from each other. Eileen shoved the reins into Lance’s hands, as he had managed to climb out front. She scurried to the top of the wagon, looking down to see the man still in pursuit of Rapunzel. “We gotta get down there!”
There was a growl, and Eileen looked up just in time to see one of the bear cat things lunge at her. She shrieked when it tackled her, and only just managed to keep herself from falling off. It tried to bite her throat, but she just managed to grab it’s jaw, keeping it from ripping her jugular.
It snarled, and hot saliva dripped onto Eileen’s face. It’s breath smelled like death and decay, and it’s claws scratched at her furiously. “Keep up with them, Max!” Eileen shouted, and managed to kick the creature off of her.
The other creature snapped at the wheel, and the wagon tilted. Maximus suddenly skidded to a stop, barely avoiding a cliff edge, but it didn’t matter. The wagon kept going.
Eileen screamed when the wagon flew through the air, flipping. She clung to the roof, wondering what it was like to be crushed-
Her back collided painfully with the wood, and she opened her eyes.
Her half of the wagon had landed on top of Rapunzel’s, and she was pinned between the two, but in a stroke of good luck, she was merely trapped in a small pocket of space, not crushed. Rapunzel looked up at her, surprised.
“Holy fucking shit.” Eileen gasped.
“Hello to you too.” Rapunzel said.
Eileen grunted, trying to push the wagon off of herself, but it was no use. There was about a foot of open space on the roof of the wagon, next to her head, and suddenly a pair of black boots landed beside her, and the yellow eyed man stared down at her with open hate. Eileen thrashed uselessly. “Wait wait wait shit-!”
The man raised his sword, but was suddenly pushed back by Adira, who seemed to have arrived just in time to prevent Eileen’s surprise decapitation. The two fought, and Eileen used the distraction to try and free herself, wriggling frantically, but with every bounce of the road, the confines seemed to get a little bit tighter.
There was a grunt, and Eileen saw the man fly off of the wagon, landing back on his rhino. “You can’t protect them forever!” He shook his fist at Adira.
“You know this guy?!” She heard Cassandra ask.
“What does he want?!” Rapunzel asked.
The rhino threw itself against the wagon, and Eileen gasped when the pressure on her chest suddenly got far worse. The wagon was sliding around, and if it fell into one of the deeper grooves on the roof, she would be crushed. “A little help?!” She squeaked.
“We’re about to be run off the cliff!” Lance shouted.
“If we’re gonna go,” Rapunzel said. “We’re gonna go big.”
She grabbed Adira’s sword before the woman could protest. “I need you to dig deep and put some distance between them and us!” She told the horses, and they snorted.
“Adira, Cassandra, wait for my signal to push the wagon off Eileen!” Rapunzel said.
“Will it come soon?” Eileen tried to say, but the wagon shifted, and it came out more as a pained wheezed.
The edge of a cliff approached rapidly, and Rapunzel leaned down and cut the harness, letting Fidella and Maximus loose. The wagon went over the edge-
“Now!” Rapunzel shouted, and Adira and Cassandra pushed the wagon top off of Eileen. She gasped, grateful for the air but suddenly acutely aware she was about to die again, still splattered messily-
Rapunzel threw out her hair, and Eileen grabbed it, coming to a jerking stop. Rapunzel looped the other end around a thick branch, having somehow managed to get everyone. Eileen heard shuffling above them, a snort of a rhino, and then the slow rumble of it walking away.
She gasped again. “Holy shit.” She wheezed.
*** *** ***
“If you told me two years ago that I would be fighting weird jackal monsters while on the back of a speeding wagon, I would’ve called you crazy,” Eileen frowned, walking after the group through a dense patch of vines. “Now it’s just another day.”
“Peaceful, huh?” Cassandra asked.
“Don’t you start, I almost suffocated. I get a temporary bullying pass.” She said.
Cassandra rolled her eyes, and then glared at Adira. “Time for some answers. Who was that guy? And don’t give us your cryptic runaround talk.”
“His name is Hector,” Adira said evenly. “And I don’t think I appreciate your tone.”
“Sorry I gave you the impression that I care what you think. Let me be clear. I don’t.” Cassandra snapped.
“Alright, alright,” Rapunzel stepped between the two. “Who’s Hector?”
“He’s a member of the Brotherhood,” Adira said quietly. “A group of warriors sworn to keep anyone and everyone away from the Dark Kingdom.”
“Dark Kingdom? That’s where we’re heading.” Rapunzel said, pulling out the scroll piece that depicted the black castle surrounded by rocks.
“How many are in this brotherhood?” Cassandra asked.
“Not many,” Adira said. “But you’ve encountered one before. Quirin, Varian’s father.”
Eileen barely stifled a gasp, and Rapunzel stiffened as though struck. “But none are as dangerous or sadistic as Hector,” Adira said. “And this is his domain: the Great Tree.”
Eileen paused, realizing they were at the foot of a massive dead tree, the wood bleached white from years of exposure. Carved out into the tree was an ornate entrance, and Adira glanced back at them, expression unreadable. “He’s sworn to stay here to ensure that no one crosses these mountains.” Adira explained.
“And how do you know so much about this?!” Cassandra demanded.
“Let’s just say the Brotherhood and I disagree on a couple things.” Adira said.
“Okay,” Eileen said. “So we gotta go through crazy rhino man’s house to get to the Dark Kingdom?”
“We barely escaped from this Hector with our lives,” Cassandra said. “And now we’re going to trust her and go through his home turf?!” She gestured to Adira. “I don’t like it.”
“Like it or not, we’ve only got one choice.” Adira said.
Cassandra scowled, but said nothing, looking at Rapunzel. Rapunzel pursed her lips, catching Eileen’s eye.
“Your call, Blondie.” Eileen said.
Rapunzel sighed. “I...I’m going with Adira on this one.”
A flash of hurt crossed Cassandra’s face before she could cover it up with a scowl, but Adira nodded. “Okay, let’s get through that tree.” Rapunzel said, following Adira into the hollow roots of the long dead, bone-white tree.
*** *** ***
The inside of the tree was not anything that Eileen expected.
It was a lush, green forest, and light managed to shine in brightly. Birds chirped cheerfully, swooping around without a care in the world. “It’s...beautiful.” Rapunzel said.
“Sure,” Cassandra said. “But we need to keep moving if we want to stay ahead of Hector.”
Pascal squeaked in alarm, suddenly racing in front of Cassandra. “Woah!” She said, realizing she had nearly stepped into a pit. “Thanks, buddy.”
“Look!” Rapunzel pointed ahead, and Eileen realized the twisting interior of the tree led upwards in a sort of strange path.
“Looks like the only way out is to go all the way up that road.” Eileen said.
“And down the other.” Rapunzel said.
“Then I guess that’s what we gotta do,” Cassandra said shortly. “Come on. This place gives me the creeps.”
“That’s probably because this tree was once known as the Tree of Zhan Tiri.” Adira said quietly.
“Wait,” Rapunzel said, suddenly looking unsure. “That sorcerer who caused the deadly blizzard?”
“And his freaky art teacher friend.” Eileen added.
“You might have mentioned Zhan Tiri before you dragged us here!” Cassandra snapped.
“It’s harmless now,” Adira said. “A millenia ago, this tree was a sentient being, a force for good. But it was corrupted by the evil sorcerer to destroy any who approached. It was Zhan Tiri’s stronghold. Inside it, he was invincible. But Lord Demanitus put a stop to the tree’s magic using an enchanted spear. So you see, you have nothing to fear. The evil magic is long gone.” She seemed far too nonchalant.
“But more importantly,” Adira smiled. “You’re with me.”
Cassandra scowled, and Eileen was inclined to agree.
“Well,” Rapunzel said, trying to give a bright smile, though she looked slightly unsettled. “It is a long way up. We better get a move on.”
*** *** ***
“What...is this place?” Eileen asked, looking around the little room.
Intricate writing covered the walls, and there was a tiny pool of water in the center, surrounded by flowers and a long limbed tree that hung over it like a guardian. Notches had been carved out into the stone wall, and each one held several scrolls.
“I don’t-” Rapunzel paused, and gasped. She dug the scroll piece out of her bag and held it up. Eileen followed her gaze and paused.
The exact same drawing on the scroll was depicted on the wall. The sun, dripping a gold liquid into a flower, and the moon doing the same. Where the scroll had torn away before, there were the black rocks, born of the moon.
“What does it mean?” Lance asked.
“No one knows for sure.” Adira said. She knelt down, picking up a scroll. “But many have perished trying to unravel it’s mysteries.”
“That’s not ominous at all. Thanks Adira.” Eileen said.
Cassandra picked up a scroll, looked it over, and then handed it to Rapunzel. “Well, someone translated part of it.”
Rapunzel skimmed it, eyes darting across the parchment. “‘Flower gleam and glow, let your powers’...it’s the healing incantation for the sundrop,” She realized. “This must be where it came from.”
She dropped the parchment, snatching up another. “I...oh my God.”
“What is it?” Eileen said, craning her neck to try and peek over her shoulder.
“It’s another incantation.” Rapunzel muttered, pacing slowly.
“Another sundrop incantation?” Cassandra asked.
“No,” Rapunzel said slowly. “The moonstone.”
Cassandra pursed her lips. “The sundrop’s power was to heal,” Cassandra said. “What’s the moonstone’s?”
Probably nothing good, Eileen wanted to say, but her mouth felt dry.
Rapunzel hummed noncommittally, wandering to the edge of the pool, studying the scroll. “‘Wither and decay,’” She read aloud. “‘End this destiny. Break these early chains, and set the spirit free.’”
Eileen itched her palm. Rapunzel looked around, unsure, glancing at her hair. Nothing had happened.
“‘Wither and decay, end this destiny. Break these earthly chains and set the spirit free.’” Rapunzel read again, this time with a bit more gusto. The pool rippled.
Eileen suddenly sucked in a harsh breath when her hand suddenly burst with pain. She grabbed it, confused to see a long gash, stretching across the center of her palm. Blood already pooled in her hand, dripping out.
“Hey, guys-” Eileen said, and then paused, noticing the plant life around the pool wilting away, blackening to ash around Rapunzel’s feet.
“Raps?” Cassandra asked uncertainly, stepping back. Eileen stiffened, horror shooting through her when she suddenly remembered where exactly she had injured her hand, and how exactly it had been treated.
“Oh God, oh my God-” Eileen stumbled back, but the wave of death reached her, and she tensed up, expecting her gut to explode in agony, where she would find herself in a pool of blood again, this time without the slight benefit of knowing she had saved Rapunzel’s life-
Instead her knees gave out, and she fell to the ground, and each breath felt like she was breathing in a thick smog. Her vision was oddly blurry, and she felt dizzy.
For some reason, the image of a cracked glass came to her. It was a bit like that; life slowly leaking out of her until there was nothing left. She forced herself to look around, and it seemed as though everyone else was in the same boat.
Except for Rapunzel.
”Wither and decay.” She said, finally singing. It was beautiful, her voice was beautiful, but it was empty and devoid of any emotion. The scroll dropped from her hand, and her hair came loose.
“End this destiny.” She continued, heedless of how her hair turned an inky black and arched upwards, as if trying to escape, and then froze. Eileen clenched her teeth, wheezing painfully, feeling blood still running from the newly opened gash in her hand.
“Break these earthly chains, set the spirit free.” Rapunzel sang softly.
“Rapunzel, stop!” Cassandra gasped, trying to stand, but she stumbled and collapsed painfully.
“The spirit free.” Rapunzel said, letting the note ring a little longer, sucking the life out of everyone in the room.
And slowly, verse by verse, Eileen started to die again.
Notes:
shorter chapter, sorry, because a big chunk of that particular episode was just lance and eugene getting high. disney, everybody!
also, yeah, another big canon divergance! im not the first person to do this idea, unfortunately, buit i thought it was a cool concept narratively, so here we are
also but seriosuly, how in the fuck did hector get a rhino. i genuinely need to know. and his bearcats are called binturongs, and they're from AUSTRALIA. HOW THE FUCK DID HE GET THEM, DISNEY I NEED ANSWERS, IS HECTOR AUSTRALIAN
Chapter 8: Fussing Over Scars (Part Two)
Notes:
WHY THE HELL DO I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED IN SUPERNATURAL DESPITE NEVER HAVING SEEN AN EPISODE IN MY LIFE
SUPERNATURAL FANS IM SO SORRY
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Eileen supposed, if she had to pick, this time around dying wasn’t quite so bad.
It hurt, of course, and quite a bit, but it was nothing compared to feeling herself fill up with her own blood, drowning her from the inside out while the crimson stain around her spread. This was far more pleasant than hearing Rapunzel sob as the world spun and faded away, waiting for either what promised to be a less than pleasant afterlife or an eternity of nothingness. (She wondered now, in the back of her mind, if her good deeds since meeting Rapunzel were enough to balance out her past. That is, assuming this wasn’t it.)
But she would still have much rather not heard Rapunzel lifelessly singing that perverse version of the sundrop song, repeating it over and over as though she had forgotten how to do anything else.
Dying’s not so bad, She wanted to assure the others. Trust me, it could be a lot worse! Just try to relax, I suppose, and don’t think about what comes next.
Instead she gasped for air.
“Gah!” Through blurry vision, she saw Adira force herself up, charging Rapunzel. She shoved her forward roughly, and the princess went flying. Rapunzel fell into the shallow pool, and didn’t get up as the black disappeared from her hair, going back to blonde.
Eileen gasped, suddenly able to breathe and stand again. Her hand no longer hurt. “Rapunzel!” She gasped, stumbling forward. “Oh my God, no-”
Wouldn’t that just be poetic, Fitzherbert, if she died instead of you.
Cassandra reached Rapunzel first, having been closer. After an awful moment of stillness, Rapunzel blinked her eyes open, looking confused, and smiled slightly. “That was...unexpected.”
“Just a little, Christ…” Eileen breathed, sitting back shakily, not caring that she was soaking wet now. Cassandra hugged Rapunzel, looking just as relieved, but Eileen didn’t trust herself to hug Rapunzel without breaking down, one way or another.
“Thank you Adira.” Rapunzel said softly, and Cassandra scowled.
Adira said nothing, and Eileen focused on making sure her breathing didn’t shake, betraying her fear.
*** *** ***
Eileen wiped her stained hand vigorously on her pant leg when she was sure no one was looking, scraping off the dried blood. She picked the dark crimson flakes away, biting her lip when she saw she now had a long, thin white scar across her palm. It hadn’t been there before.
Another to hide along with your head, She thought, somewhat hysterically.
Adira led them up steps, the scenery now far darker, shadows edging at the corners, making Eileen feel skittish. She peeked over the side of the stairs and winced at the seemingly endless drop.
“Long way down.” She muttered.
“I guess this means we’re at the halfway point.” Rapunzel said.
“I suggest we camp here for the night.” Adira said.
“No way,” Cassandra said. “We are getting out of this tree as soon as possible.”
Eileen didn’t say anything, but she agreed with Cassandra. She hated this damn tree and what it nearly did. She still felt heavy, like the spectre of Death was sitting on her shoulder, just waiting for an opportunity to snatch her up in revenge for escaping not once, but twice.
“I’m not sure that’s your call, kid.” Adira said lightly.
“We could use the rest, Cass.” Rapunzel said, and Eileen stared off into the pit, lest anyone see the panic on her face.
“This place nearly got us killed an hour ago!” Cassandra argued.
“And thankfully,” Adira said. “I was there to stop it.”
“Stay out of this!” Cassandra snapped at her.
“I think you should calm down.” Adira said evenly.
“You know what I think?!” Cassandra hissed. “I think you’re playing us. I think you led us down here on purpose, and for some sick reason, you wanted Rapunzel to find that incantation and read it!”
“Cass, listen to yourself.” Rapunzel said.
“I’m telling you now,” Cassandra said, turning to face her and grabbing her shoulder. “We need to get out of this tree, but more importantly-” She dropped her voice. “We need to lose Adira before she gets us all killed.”
“I can’t do that.” Rapunzel said.
There was an awful beat of silence. “What...do you mean you can’t do that? Of course you can. Are you so obliviously naive that you can’t see-”
“Enough Cassandra!” Rapunzel said, nearing a shout. She yanked away, and Eileen flinched slightly.
Cassandra looked shocked. “No one is getting rid of anyone!” Rapunzel said. “Is that clear?!”
Cassandra looked around at the group. She tried to make eye contact with Eileen, desperate for support, for backup-
Eileen looked away.
Cassandra clenched her fists. “Yes, Your Highness,” She said in a low voice, and pushed past Rapunzel. “I’ll take the first watch.”
*** *** ***
Eileen was very good at pretending to be sleeping.
She wished she had a watch coming up, but after Cassandra, it was Rapunzel’s turn. And that seemed so, so far away.
She felt stiff and hyper. The skittish feeling didn’t leave, and sometimes she had to open her eyes for the irrational fear that someone was leaning over her, about to grab her, someone else, or Rapunzel-
But there was never anyone there.
You’re being irrational, She scolded herself. You’re fine. Everyone’s fine. You’re being a pussy about nothing. You’ve had plenty of near misses, why are you letting this one rattle you so much?
But if she thought too much about it, the memory of feeling the life slowly drain out of her while Rapunzel sang and sang, she felt sick, and that awful struggle to breathe came back and she had to fight not to wheeze, trying to argue with her own irrational, spiraling mind that she was only doing this to herself, her own panic and emotions getting the best of her once again.
She must have fallen asleep at some point, because she didn’t see the rock fall. She only jerked awake in a panic when it crashed inches from her.
“What’s happening?!” Eileen burst out, heart racing.
“That moonstone has the power to destroy the world!” She heard someone shouted over the clanging of a sword on the other side of the rock. “We’ve seen it!”
She heard snarling, and looked up to see the two bear cats snarling at them. She stepped back, realizing Hector must have found them.
“I’ve seen the sun drop’s power first hand, Hector,” Adira’s voice said. “And so will you when we return to the Dark Kingdom.”
“That’ll never happen.” Hector said darkly, and there was a cry, and a harsh thud of someone falling against stone.
“I’m sorry it had to come to this, sister.” Hector said softly, and then he appeared on top of the rock, staring down at the group with his awful, yellow eyes.
“And now…” He said, hopping down, followed by his beasts. “The so-called sundrop.”
Eileen’s knife was out in a second. Hector smiled, as though this was a cute gesture-
“Leave her alone.” Cassandra stood, sword out and poised for the offensive.
Hector turned his attention to her and chuckled. “Brave child,” He mused. “Stupid. But brave.”
“You want the sundrop?” She asked. “You gotta go through me first.”
“‘Kay.” Hector said, merely leaning back away from Cassandra when she swung at him. He kicked her back painfully, and lunged. “Try again!” He yelled, and punched her.
Eileen leapt forward, swinging her knife. Hector spotted her, dodging and stabbing at her. She backed up, trying to bait him into coming closer like she had done with Stalyan. Hector seemed to realize her trick, though, and threw himself at her, tossing her across the room.
Cassandra charged again, but he disarmed her, throwing her as well. Cassandra reached for her sword, but Hector stepped on her wrist, smiling. “Well?” He asked, grin too big. “What are you waiting for?”
“Funny you should ask.” Cassandra said, and threw dust in his awful eyes.
Hector jerked back with a cry of surprise, and Cassandra pushed him-over the cliff edge.
“Cass!” Rapunzel cried in warning as the bearcats charged her. Cassandra dodged seconds before they struck, and the beasts went flying over the side with a wail as well.
Cassandra stood up, slightly shaky. Everything was still.
And then the ground rumbled, and a cold, dry breeze that smelled of decay swept through the tree, and it sounded like a death rattle.
“Christ.” Eileen said, hauling herself to her feet.
Glowing, green vines that looked more like tentacles exploded up from the pit, and Cassandra stumbled back.
The vines separated, revealing Hector hanging from them, limp and lifeless, holding a spear with a bright blue head. Eileen felt sick.
And then Hector’s head jerked up, eyes empty and white, and screamed.
Eileen clapped her hands over her ears at the horrible sound, falling back. “All those who enter the Great Tree of Zhan Tiri shall be destroyed!” Hector wailed, and his voice was pitched and unnatural.
Vines shot out, corralling them into a circle. Adira was back, and Eileen didn’t know when she had returned, though right now she didn’t really care. “The tree’s alive!” Rapunzel gasped, looking horrified.
A vine shot out at Eileen, and she swung her knife, cutting it easily. It flopped to the ground, twisting and writhing like a lizard’s dropped tail, squealing faintly.
Adira leapt at Hector, knocking the spear out of his grip. It pierced a thick clump of vines, and they withered and blackened. Cassandra opened her mouth, maybe to shout something about it, but a vine struck her, and she went flying.
“Cass-” Eileen turned, but something struck her knee and she tilted, gasping from the blow. A vine grabbed her ankle and yanked her back, and she shrieked, swiping at it frantically. Another vine grabbed her wrist, twisting it, and she dropped her knife with a clatter.
“No!” She thrashed, but within seconds, they had wrapped around her tightly, squeezing painfully like an anaconda’s grip. She gasped, refusing to quit struggling, even as the blood rushed to her head from hanging upside down and she felt the vines slowly squeezing her, as if seeing if she would pop under enough pressure.
She saw Rapunzel, an odd look on the princess’ face, and she threw her hair around the largest clump of vines in long sections. Eileen felt dread settle in her stomach, and she wanted to yell, but she couldn’t find her voice. She squeaked uselessly.
“Raps!” Cassandra said, fighting vines that were still trying to drag her to her knees. “You can’t do that incantation again!”
“I don’t have a choice, Cass.” Rapunzel said.
“Please, Raps,” Cassandra sounded desperate. “The spear can kill him!” She tried to reach for the glowing spear, but was dragged away. “Let me try and grab it!”
The vines squeezed tighter, and Eileen somehow cried out in pain, spots dancing before her eyes, and she realized her ribs were probably seconds away from caving in. Would they pierce her from the inside out? What did that feel like? She had broken ribs before, sure, but never like this.
“Eileen!” Rapunzel cried out, looking panicked, and Eileen cursed herself for her weakness. Rapunzel turned to Cassandra. “I have to do this.”
“No!” Cassandra yelled, reaching out again for the spear.
Rapunzel’s face screwed up, and for a second, Eileen thought she was going to cry. Instead, she shut her eyes, face going stoic.
“Wither and decay, end this destiny,” She said softly. “Break these earthly chains, set the spirit free.”
Her hair went black again, and this time green streaks ran through it, though Eileen couldn’t quite tell if it was taking the magic from Zhan Tiri or creating its own. Rapunzel’s eyes opened, and they were entirely black except for a bright, poison green pupil.
Eileen waited for the awful cracked glass feeling, and the pain in her hand. But it didn’t come.
The walls cracked, chunks of rubble raining down, and Eileen’s stomach exploded into agony.
She shouted, though she couldn’t hear herself over the chaos around her. The vines trapping her withered and dropped her, and she fell to the ground clenching her teeth to keep herself from crying out, both from pain and the awful, awful fear that seemed to grip her just as tightly as the vines.
“Wither and decay, end this destiny…” Rapunzel repeated the mantra, and Eileen felt something warm and wet dripping down her stomach.
“R-Rapunzel-!” She cried hoarsely, trying to stand, clutching her side. She fell to the ground, and Lance was at her side in a second, grabbing her shoulder. She tried to shake him off, uselessly.
“Lance, go!” She heard Rapunzel shout, and Eileen tried to open her mouth to argue, but all that came out was a wheeze.
“But Princess-” Lance tried to argue, but Rapunzel turned to him, face desperate.
“GO!” She commanded.
He grabbed Eileen’s arm and hauled her to her feet. Somehow, she managed to keep from crying out, but the movement was too much. She pitched forward, and stumbled into darkness.
*** *** ***
“-een!”
She jerked awake with a gasp. Where was she? Heaven? Hell? Purgatory? It wasn’t a void, there were things around her-
Lance was next to her, her arm slung around his neck to support her. She pulled away, surprised and a little panicked. “I-I...what?”
“Are you okay?!” Lance asked.
“Am I…” She paused, realizing she could breathe, freely and unhindered, and her stomach no longer gushed blood. “I’m...yeah. Okay.”
(Thank God for the new jacket, the dark color hid many stains. Blood was one, and she could still feel it clinging to her skin like a disease and it made her sick and afraid but at least no one had seemed to realize-)
She heard a pained groan, and saw Cassandra folded in on herself, clutching her right arm, face in a tight, painful grimace. The flesh on her right arm was blackened and shriveled, and Eileen could tell by her expression that she was trying to hold in a sob.
“Oh, Cass, your hand!” Rapunzel said (she was okay thank God she was okay Eileen would have never forgiven herself if she cheated death three times and Rapunzel perished-) “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” Cassandra managed to say.
“But-” Rapunzel started.
“I said I’m fine!” Cassandra snapped, and clenched her teeth to keep any noises of pain from escaping.
“But you’re hurt.” Rapunzel said.
“I know.” Cassandra said, looking over at the rubble. There was a suit of armor, though Eileen didn’t really know where in the tree that had come from. “It won’t happen again.”
Eileen took a breath to steady herself, willing her emotions away. “What now?” She asked quietly, trying to stand like someone who hadn’t had a stab wound reopened and then closed just as quickly.
Rapunzel was dead silent. She stared ahead at the purple dusk sky, the rocks jutting out of the ground. It was funny how quickly they had become used to them. It felt strange not to see the rocks dotting the landscape after all this time.
“It’s your call, Raps.” Cassandra said, and she was wearing the armor. It clanked slightly when she moved, and Eileen couldn’t tell if she was still in pain or just hiding it incredibly well. Her expression was slightly apprehensive, guarded, though Eileen wasn’t exactly sure against what.
Rapunzel looked down, and then up again. “This path has been laid out for me,” She said. “There’s no turning back.”
She looked back, expression a strange mix of determined and hopeful. “I am going to the Dark Kingdom.”
*** *** ***
It was the dead of night when Eileen felt safe enough to wander from the group in search of water.
She found a stream about five minutes away, and nearly collapsed beside it, indulging herself in a rush of emotions now that no one could see her, shivering and gasping, suddenly far too hot, though the night air was cool and crisp.
She managed to keep the tears in her eyes from falling, though. She refused to succumb to such weakness again, still angry at herself for it from Stalyan’s wedding.
She heaved, and realized she hadn’t eaten anything all day. Her stomach churned, and she tasted bile. She spat on the sandy shore, and it was slightly bloody. “Fuck.” She muttered.
She dunked her stained clothing in the water, relieved that the stain (still so horribly fresh) came out easily, and the dried blood came away easily.
She splashed water on her face, wincing at the unexpected chill of it. She took a deep breath, and then another for good measure, and made her way silently back to camp.
Maximus woke up when she came back, and nickered at her questioningly. “Bathroom.” She whispered.
His ear twitched, seeing her wet clothes. Eileen sighed, pretending to look embarrassed. “Look, it’s dark. I couldn’t see.”
Maximus gave a quiet, horsey laugh, seeming to accept her claims of a fall in a river as fact. He laid his head back down and closed his eyes.
Eileen sighed, relieved, going back and laying down.
She touched her side gently.
Because now, along with her palm, there was a deceptively small scar that started in her back and ended in the front.
Right where Gothel had run her through with a dagger, murdering her.
Notes:
so i suppose i ought to explain the logistics of the magic stab wound. so im choosing to make it where after eileen's hand closed up when the song stopped, that particular injury is now "off-limits" because it's scarred over and stuff. her stab wound, however, is not
its not the best explanation, ngl, but it's what ive got because this is still fanfiction
also eileen "ill just bury all my feelings here and then one day ill die" makes yet another appearance! also i just realized the other day i could have named her eugenia and even though that name makes me want to vomit i could have called her Genie and how cute is that. though i guess she would hate that anyway, so maybe its for the best.
im falling back into my coco obsession because i watched it the other night, cried for an hour, and then started rewriting an old fanfiction that might be good now that i have actual writing skills but we'll see!!!!
Chapter 9: Remember Me
Notes:
yall can have a little fluff, as a treat
also, coco reference in the title??? yessir
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“Good news!” Eileen said, sliding off of Maximus. “I found the wagon!”
Cassandra turned, and the sword slipped from her left hand, nearly impaling Lance, who yelped. Eileen made a face.
She really didn’t know the extent of Cassandra’s injuries. Cassandra didn’t talk about them, and Eileen wasn’t going to prod. Her hand didn’t seem to be hurting her anymore, and she could still grab and push (Eileen had discovered that after Cassandra shoved her after Eileen had made a comment about her ill-fitting cloak).
But any fine motor skills seemed to have disappeared almost entirely. She couldn’t write. Couldn’t really hold reins. And most importantly, she couldn’t grip a sword, thus the struggle of reteaching herself to fight with her left hand.
“You did?” Rapunzel asked eagerly.
“The bad news,” Eileen continued. “It’s in several pieces.”
Lance scowled. “How many?”
“Two big ones. And then a lot of little bits.” Eileen said, pretending not to notice Cassandra clumsily clench and unclench her hand.
The tree took a lot out of them, in many ways. Cassandra probably had the worst, seeing as she had basically lost any real use of her hand. Rapunzel had upped her positivity factor to one hundred in a desperate attempt to keep the group from falling apart, and Lance seemed to be taking Eileen’s distance personally.
Eileen felt...empty, in a sense. The newest brush with her own mortality had been unpleasant enough, but now she had a mark from it. Whenever she was able to force herself to fall asleep, she saw Hector, limp and lifeless in the vines, speaking in a voice that was not his own and the cavern echoing with his awful, agonized screams and wails. Or sometimes she felt her blood drain from the newly reopened hole in her stomach, feeling herself empty out slowly, helpless to stop it.
That was nothing, of course, compared to that damn chant, the one that made Eileen feel sick if she even thought about it. Even the mere memory of Rapunzel’s blank and empty voice singing and her obsidian hair made Eileen feel panicky, as though if she thought about it too much it might manifest into reality. So she simply decided that she would keep herself at an arm's length.
She really should have anticipated this going over badly with Rapunzel.
Cassandra had always been a fairly closed off person, so her slight shortness around Rapunzel was noted, but not unexpected. But for Eileen, Rapunzel seemed to almost refuse to leave her alone, trying desperately to strike up conversations at any chance she got, ignoring Eileen’s one word answers and efforts to get away.
It was probably mean to do this, she knew, but she didn’t care. If she spoke, she knew it would only be a matter of time before Rapunzel dragged the truth out of her, and with the truth her awful, rotting fear would come bubbling up and out of her like a hot spring. Fear of the new scars that shouldn’t be there, fear of her own death (as cowardly as that was) and worst of all, most insidious and whispering was the fear that someone would not be returning to Corona with them.
And Eileen didn’t know what she would do if that someone was Rapunzel.
She couldn’t afford to spiral, not with so much on the line, especially now. And it was selfish to do so anyway, the others had it so much worse, after all.
She led them back to the crippled wagon, helping drag the pieces out of the riverbed. “How are we supposed to fix this?” Lance asked miserably, picking up two chunks of roofing, staring at them as if they would whisper words of carpentry wisdom to him.
“A lot of glue, probably.” Cassandra said blandly.
Rapunzel perked up. “Eileen and I are on the case! We’ll go get supplies.”
“We will?” Eileen asked, discomfort twisting in her stomach. Rapunzel smiled at her, and Eileen could just barely see the strain in it, the way it was being pulled apart to try and keep the group together. Guilt overtook the discomfort, and Eileen sighed.
“Alright,” She said slowly. “Let’s get this over with.”
*** *** ***
“So lately, I just can’t seem to stop thinking about Attila’s cupcakes,” Rapunzek said brightly, trailing after Eileen. “It’s like when you get a song stuck in your head, but it’s a taste stuck in my head. Isn’t it funny?”
Eileen didn’t answer, and Rapunzel pretended not to notice. “Anyway, what about you, Eileen? Anything on your mind lately?”
“Where’s Pascal?” Eileen asked, only then noticing the tiny reptile wasn’t on Rapunzel’s shoulder, his usual perch.
“Oh! I left him with the others...I figured we could have some one-on-one time!” Rapunzel smiled, pretending once again not to notice Eileen’s frown. “So, about my question-”
“The town’s just over this hill.” Eileen interrupted, picking up her speed slightly so Rapunzel had to jog to catch up.The made it over the crest, and Rapunzel frowned, seeing the black rocks protruding from the ground, piercing into the now empty, tiny village.
“Oh, no,” She said sadly. “The rocks must’ve driven everyone out.”
“Nothing we can do about it now.” Eileen said, picking her way through the wreckage, making a note to look for a knife.
She felt an odd pang of grief at her lost knife. It was a silly thing to miss, and an easy trade for her and Rapunzel’s life, but...she had earned that knife. She had taken it from Stalyan the night she had fled, and had taught herself through bloody trial and error to fight with it. It was stupid to have such an attachtment to a weapon, but…
She shook the thoughts of what-ifs away and began to dig through the debris again. “Come on, we don’t have much time before the sun sets.”
“Eileen, look at this!” Rapunzel called, circling a large wooden cart that had somehow remained relatively unscatched. “It’s an apothecary cart! It’s got all kinds of tonics and powders and-a snow potion!” She picked up a little glass vial filled with what looked like flour.
“Come on, that stuff is a scam-” She stepped back in surprise when Rapunzel opened the snow vial, and a harsh gust of wind blew out of it, along with several fat snowflakes.
“Hm,” Eileen said, approaching the cart. “But we’re not gonna fix the wagon with snow.”
She opened a few drawers, pausing when one held a blue book with an odd symbol and a long, ornate stick. She picked up the book, flipping through it. “‘The Wand of Oblivium,’” She read aloud. “‘Erases what you wish to forget.’”
“A memory wand!” Rapunzel said, picking it up and waving it. “Wonder if it works.” She paused, and placed it back in the drawer. Her face lit up again. “A memory wand! Wonder if it works.” She picked it up again.
Eileen made a face. “Careful, don’t-” She paused when she saw Rapunzel’s mischievous smile.
“Gotcha.” Rapunzel said.
“Very funny,” Eileen said dryly, dropping the book back in the drawer after the wand. “Be on the lookout for knives, I need a new one.”
“Mhm,” Rapunzel said, wandering off. “Too bad there’s not a ‘open-up-to-your-best-friend-about-the-thing-you-guys-are-fighting-about’ wand, right?”
“We’re not fighting.” Eileen said before she could stop herself.
“Not actively,” Rapunzel said glumly. “Which is worse.”
“What, do you…” Eileen paused, confused. “Want to start fighting? What do you want to fight about?”
“No, that’s not it! I...are you mad at me for something?” Rapunzel asked.
“No.” Eileen said.
“Then why are you ignoring me?” Rapunzel asked.
“I’m not.” Eileen said, pretending to focus on sifting through rubble.
“It feels like it.” Rapunzel said quietly.
“Then I’m sorry, I’m not trying too. Can we focus on what we need to do? Please?” Eileen said, dangerously close to snapping.
Rapunzel didn’t say anything, and Eileen kicked aside a broken plank, pausing when something sparkled dully in the dirt. She carefully dug it up, pleased to find a long hunting knife, abandoned in the scuffle. It was nothing like her old one, lacking the ornate carvings around the edges, and it didn’t have the imperfections in the metal that Eileen knew so well. The weight was different, and she tossed it between her hands before sighing deeply, slipping it into her boot.
Everything was different now, and she hated it.
“We should make camp for the night,” Eileen said. “The sun’s going down.”
“Probably don’t want to wander the woods at night.” Rapunzel agreed.
*** *** ***
“I can’t sleep.” Rapunzel said, not much later.
“It’s because it’s been two minutes.” Eileen said, taking care to face away from her.
There was a deep sigh, and Eileen heard Rapunzel shuffle. “Eileen, I need to talk about what we both know is going on between us. And don’t say there’s nothing-” Rapunzel said before Eileen could even open her mouth to argue. “Because we both know that’s not true.”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” Eileen said. “I never said anything was wrong.”
“You don’t have to.” Rapunzel said.
“Yeah?” Eileen asked, starting to get irritated. “What makes you so confident that you know what I’m feeling?”
“Friends just…” Rapunzel paused. “Have a way of knowing.”
“Look, can you just drop it?!” Eileen snapped. “I’m fine. And if I wasn’t, I don’t want you trying to psychoanalyze me.”
“You’re not fine!” Rapunzel protested. “Ever since the tree you’ve been pushing everyone away! Pushing me away! I know Cass is still a bit mad at me, and I get that, but I...I wanna know what I did to make you upset.”
“You didn’t do anything.” Eileen said, which was true, but she couldn’t tell her why.
“Then why are you trying so hard to avoid me?”
“Because it’s none of your business!” Eileen sat up quickly, and yelped when her head hit something hard. She hadn’t realized she had been so close to the apothecary cart, and the drawer had been hanging out right over her. Something fell into her hand, and she grabbed it on instinct, not seeing what it was.
“I know you don’t like talking about stuff like how you’re feeling and all that,” Rapunzel said. “And I get it, I really do! But if something’s hurting you or upsetting you, we can’t just brush past it.”
“Can you just forget about it?! About everything?! Christ Almighty!” Eileen snapped, glaring at her.
Rapunzel winced, and instantly guilt rushed through Eileen. She didn’t have any time to apologize, though. The object in her hand shimmered, and Eileen realized she had been holding the memory wand.
The wand glowed a bright red, vibrating in Eileen’s hand. The wood grew hot, and Eileen dropped it, but there was a bright flash, and a loud humming in her ears and-
Blackness.
*** *** ***
Eileen woke up with a distinct sense of deja vu, and realized immediately why when she saw she was tied to a chair by Rapunzel’s hair. “What?” She said, the thought that this must be a dream popping into her head. It wasn’t, though. It couldn’t be.
She pulled, wondering if this was some kind of strange prank, trying to quell the panic in her chest when she realized the bonds held fast.
“Who are you,” A tremulous but determined voice said. “And how did I get here?”
Eileen glanced up, pausing when she saw Rapunzel glaring at her, masking her fear and nervousness with bravado. She gripped her frying pan tightly, slung over her shoulder in a stance that meant Eileen was going to get it if she said or did the wrong thing.
“Oh my God.” Eileen said, the weight of the situation crashing down on her like a falling house. That damn wand!
“Answer me!” Rapunzel demanded, pointing the frying pan at Eileen’s face. She winced, leaning as far back as she could without falling. “How did you get me out of my tower?!”
“You really don’t remember?” Eileen asked.
“Was it magic?!” Rapunzel asked. “Are you a wizard?”
“Do I look like a wizard?!” Eileen demanded.
“I don’t know, I’ve never seen a real one.” Rapunzel said.
“I’m definitely not a wizard.” Eileen said, opening her hands as if to show off her lack of magic power.
“It has to be magic.” Rapunzel said, half to herself, circling Eileen. Eileen craned her neck painfully to see her. She didn’t like not having the frying pan in her line of sight.
“I mean, Mother said people will try anything to steal my hair.” Rapunzel said.
Eileen made a face at the mention of Gothel, and resisted going on a tirade about the long dead bitch. It would probably only make Rapunzel mad at her now.
“I was in the tower just two seconds ago,” Rapunzel said. “And now I’m here. So magic is really the only possible explanation. Oh…” Rapunzel frowned, looking worried. “Mother must be so worried! And Pascal too!”
“Christ, that damn wand.” Eileen muttered to herself, but Rapunzel heard, springing towards her.
“So you did use magic on me!” She accused, pointing the frying pan at her.
“No no! I didn’t! I…” She trailed off, trying to come up with a convincing lie, spotting the book and wand lying discarded on the ground. “But the reason you don’t remember leaving your tower is because...ruffians. Ruffians! Yeah, ruffians put a spell on you.”
“Ruffians?!” Rapunzel looked mortified.
“Mhm. Yeah. Really...ruffian-like. Yeah.” Eileen said lamely, hoping this Rapunzel couldn’t read her quite so easily now.
“Mother warned me to watch out for those…” Rapunzel mused. “And quicksand. And snapping turtles. And lava. And poison ivy, and puppets, and guys on stilts, plague, riptide, wooden shoes, pointy teeth-” She gasped. “Did the ruffians have pointy teeth?!”
“The pointiest,” Eileen said, wondering vaguely what the stilts issue was. “They wanted your hair, so they put you under a spell and stole you from your tower! But I, uh, rescued you.”
Rapunzel looked doubtful. “Listen, I’m on your side,” Eileen said. “I just gotta get you back home, right? I can’t really do that if I’m tied up. So can we...start there? Because also, I think the circulation in my wrists is being cut off.”
“How do I know I can trust you?” Rapunzel asked.
“I promise.” Eileen said, and then saw that wasn’t going to cut it. She took a breath, and then yanked out her ace card from nearly two years of rarely leaving Rapunzel’s side. “And I don’t break promises. Ever.”
Rapunzel paused. “Promises mean a lot to me too…” After a moment of deliberation, she reached out and tugged a knot of hair, and the bindings fell off. Eileen rubbed her wrists, relieved. Rapunzel offered her hand cheerfully. “I’m Rapunzel!”
“Heh,” Eileen shook her hand. “Eileen.”
“Nice to meet you!” Rapunzel’s expression turned serious. “If you try anything funny, I’ll pan you.”
Eileen stepped back. “And we definitely don’t want that.”
“No,” Rapunzel agreed. “We don’t.”
*** *** ***
Eileen stalled leaving, digging frantically through the apothecary cabinet, though she didn’t know what she was looking for. A jar label “Memory Restoring Juice”? With her luck, it seemed unlikely.
“So are you gonna take me home or what?” Rapunzel shouted from the edge of the town, foot tapping
“Just a minute!” Eileen called over. “Just packing a few things!”
A part of her wanted to explain to Rapunzel what had happened. The two of them could probably figure out something more quickly together. But…
It’s your fault, after all. You fucked up again, except this time your actions have more serious consequences.
Eileen grit her teeth, vowing to fix this herself before it got out of hand. Also, if Rapunzel didn’t believe her, she would probably get frying panned, and she really didn’t want that.
She managed to find the little blue book of instructions, smiling in immense relief when she saw there was a potion to reverse the effects, and then frowned when the instructions went on for several pages. She sighed deeply. She supposed it would be possible to collect ingredients and create the potion on their trip “home”. Difficult, but not impossible.
She skimmed the seemingly never-ending list of ingredients and sighed. “Alright,” She said, standing up and wandering over to the abandoned town’s border wall. “Sorry to keep you waiting, we can go.”
“Finally!” Rapunzel smiled, but paused when Eileen easily hopped over the low stone wall. She climbed on top of it, hesitant to follow.
Eileen glanced back. “What?” She asked.
“I’ve…” Rapunzel chuckled nervously, looking embarrassed. “Never walked on grass before.”
Eileen fought a grin, knowing full well one of the many simple joys Rapunzel indulged herself in was walking barefoot on grass. “Well, it’s not much different than walking anywhere else. You’ll do great.” She stretched out her hand, motioning for Rapunzel to follow.
Rapunzel smiled slightly, hearing the tease, and then paused. “What happened to your hand?”
“Hm?” Eileen asked, glancing at her palm, realizing with a jolt it was her newly scarred hand she was showing off. “Oh! I...nothing, it’s nothing. I...cut myself when I was little. Can’t even remember it, honestly.” She lied.
Rapunzel pursed her lips, not seeming to entirely believe her, but deciding to drop the subject. Slowly, she stepped down, poking to ground with her foot as if it might give out from under her. She placed her full weight down, testing the grass with open wonder and delight. She let out an excited laugh, looking to Eileen with nothing but joy in her eyes.
Eileen smiled slightly, treasuring the look. “Come on, we gotta-”
“Wait! There’s no lava, right?” Rapunzel asked.
“Uh, no,” Eileen said. “I’m basically a lava expert, and I can assure you this area is low to no risk for lava.”
Rapunzel paused, and then chuckled. “That’s...a joke, right? You’re not a lava expert.”
“Yeah, it’s a joke. I’m hilarious,” Eileen said, winking. “But there’s no lava. Promise.”
Rapunzel was quiet, but slowly nodded. “If...if you say so.”
“I do,” Eileen said, motioning for her once again to follow. “Now come on, let’s go.”
Rapunzel smiled, racing after Eileen, and for a second, it felt just like old times.
*** *** ***
“So what’s your favorite rock?” Rapunzel asked when Eileen was getting close to the end of her list of ingredients, pocketing a small root.
“My favorite what?” Eileen asked.
“Your favorite rock, silly,” Rapunzel laughed. “You can tell a lot about a person by their favorite rock.”
“You can?” Eileen asked, genuinely unsure.
Rapunzel paused. “I don’t know,” She admitted. “I’ve never asked anyone what their favorite rock is before.”
“You’ve never even asked your mother?” Eileen asked, nearly choking on the word ‘mother’.
“Yes…” Rapunzel smiled, suddenly looking embarrassed. “But she said it’s a silly question. She’s right, really, it’s just a rock-”
“I think it’s a great question.” Eileen said with maybe too much force.
But Rapunzel lit up. “Really?”
“Absolutely,” Eileen said. “My favorite rock is, ah...gold.”
“Mhm.” Rapunzel pursed her lips, but didn’t say anything else.
Eileen blinked. “What? What’s wrong with gold?”
“It’s...well, it’s a lovely pick, but it’s technically not a rock. It’s an element.” Rapunzel said, looking sheepish, as though Eileen might lash out for the correction.
“What’s the difference?” Eileen asked, glancing at Rapunzel.
Rapunzel looked unsure, and then looked surprised. “Wait, you really want to know?”
“I asked, didn’t I?” Eileen smiled.
“Oh! Well, an element is made up of only one thing, and rocks are a mix of several elements. So a rock could have gold in it, but that doesn’t mean the rock is gold. Does...that make sense?” Rapunzel said, looking slightly apprehensive.
“I...yeah. Okay, my favorite element is gold, and my favorite rock is...uh...diamond?” Eileen said.
“Mineral.” Rapunzel said quietly, more confident now.
Eileen sighed. “I don’t know many rocks. Or any, I guess. What’s your favorite then?”
“Limestone,” Rapunzel said immediately. “It’s pretty plain, but it’s the rock you usually find fossils in. And...fossils are neat.”
“When did you become an expert in rocks?” Eileen asked incredulously.
“Mother gave me a geology book a few years ago for my birthday,” Rapunzel smiled. “I’ve read it cover to cover at least one hundred times.”
“It shows.” Eileen said.
Rapunzel’s face gleamed with pride, and she opened her mouth, and then paused. “Oh, look at those flowers!” She said, rushing off.
“Don’t go to-” Rapunzel was already digging around in the bushes, the only sign she was still within shouting distance being her hair trailing behind her. “Far.” Eileen finished, and then smiled to herself. She hadn’t realized Rapunzel had such a passion for geology. But then, the princess was always surprising her.
God, I love her.
She dug out the blue book, flipping through it and smiling to herself when she spotted a small flower with white blossoms, yet another ingredient. She drew her new knife, careful not to damage the stem when she cut it. According to the book, it was an essential ingredient.
“What’s that?” Eileen jumped at Rapunzel’s voice, not realizing she had returned so soon.
“A cookbook!” She said quickly. “I’m...making soup. A super special soup.”
Rapunzel gasped. “I love soup too! Mother always makes it for my birthday-oh! We need to get you this special spice that Mother uses, it’s called ‘minne’, it’s got this bright blue flower and it’s really good!”
“Ah…” Eileen chuckled nervously. “I don’t think so. It’d be too much trouble. I don’t want my soup to keep you from getting to your tower. You do wanna get back as soon as possible, right?”
“Of course I do!” Rapunzel said.
“Great.” Eileen said, slicing a tree with her knife, hiding the action with her body. Sap oozed from the wound, and she let it collect on the knife blade before scraping it into a little glass bottle. She smiled to herself, victorious. That had been the last ingredient.
“Alright, so we aren’t that far out-” She turned and paused. Rapunzel was nowhere to be seen. “Rapunzel? Hello, Rapunzel?”
She sighed deeply, feeling a migraine itching at the back of her mind. “Oh, great…”
She quickly went back the way she came, hoping that Rapunzel hadn’t gotten herself lost. “Rapunzel? Hey, hello? Can we not do the surprise split up thing?” Eileen called out, but received no answer.
Rocks clattered down from a steep cliff face, and she looked up. “Oh, my God-”
Rapunzel was hugging the edge of the cliff face, glaring at a fat black goat as it chewed placidly on a bright blue flower-the infamous minne, she assumed. Rapunzel wasn’t going to give up so easily, though. She grabbed a long lock of hair, wrapping it around the edge of the minne that still stuck out of the goat’s mouth. The goat pulled back.
“Hey, be careful!” Eileen shouted. “I don’t want anything that’s been in that goat’s mouth anyway.” Rapunzel paid her no mind, and Eileen sighed, starting to climb up after her. “Rapunzel, we really-”
Rapunzel yanked a little too hard, and the goat let go, and Rapunzel fell back with a shriek. She fell down the mountainside, and Eileen only just managed to reach out and grab her wrist before she hit the ground.
“Oh, Christ-” Eileen took a breath, trying not to show how rattled she was. “Let’s just...get out of here, okay?”
Rapunzel pursed her lips, looking guilty as Eileen helped her back down. “I…” She paused. “I am so sorry for causing trouble. The minne was just right there, and I really wanted you to have it, since you’ve been doing so much for me.”
“It’s fine,” Eileen said, brushing herself off. “We’re alright, after all. So it’s no big deal.”
“No, Eileen, saving my life is a big deal.” Rapunzel said earnestly, and Eileen almost smiled at the solemness in her voice. They usually faced death every day. (And it was also usually Rapunzel who saved her)
“Thank you so much,” Rapunzel continued, starting to follow Eileen again. “Not just for that, but for...for everything! I’m so lucky to have someone like you I can trust. I don’t know what I’d do here without you.”
“That’s sappy.” Eileen said before she could stop herself, and then winced. Guilt was already eating away at her for her mistake, and Rapunzel’s kind words only made it worse. “Ah, sorry. I...thanks. That’s...I think nearly facing death is enough for one day, don’t you think?” She squinted at the setting sun. “We’ll head north for the tower in the morning, sound good?”
Rapunzel smiled brilliantly. “Okay.”
*** *** ***
Eileen reread the instructions for the potion once again, although by this point she was fairly sure she could regurgitate them. She didn’t want to risk messing it up.
“Soup smells good!” Rapunzel said, coming back with an armful of firewood. That was a lie, it didn’t smell like anything. Thought Eileen supposed it was a good thing. It would probably have been suspicious if the potion smelled awful.
“Thanks.” Eileen said anyway, and then nearly jumped when Rapunzel sat next to her, leaning against her amiably.
Rapunzel noted her reaction, unfortunately. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” Eileen lied, looking back at the cauldron filled with bubbling potion to hide her blush. “The soup needs to simmer overnight. We can taste-test it in the morning, and then head to the tower.” And then everything will be back to normal and we can never speak of this again.
“Hm.” Rapunzel said, twisting her fingers somewhat nervously. “Sure. I guess...maybe some small part of me doesn’t want...to go back to the tower.”
Eileen glanced at her, and Rapunzel let out a long breath. “Wow, it feels so good to get that out!” She looked up, staring at the stars. “The world is just such an amazing place, and I don’t know if I’m ready to give that up yet.”
Then she frowned. “Ugh, I feel so bad saying this because my mother only wants what’s best for me and the world is kinda dangerous, but…” Eileen had to physically bite her lip to keep an insult about Gothel from slipping out, but Rapunzel continued. “Isn’t danger what makes it exciting?”
“Why…” Eileen paused. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Because we’re friends,” Rapunzel looked Eileen in the eye and smiled, somewhat shyly. “That’s...what friends do, right? They tell each other what’s in their hearts.”
I mean, ideally, but there’s a lot in there, Blondie, that I know you don’t want.
“Well…” Rapunzel said, standing up. “Good night.”
Eileen didn’t answer, staring into the fire until her eyes watered from the heat. “Oh, Christ.” She muttered to herself.
She loved her friends and life, but...there were some days that she really wished she could still pull on Flynn Rider’s mask of cold, calculating logic. She didn’t let herself get tangled up in messy emotions. Eileen had already tried to pull that move, but Rapunzel knocked down her defenses as if they were paper without even trying too.
She sighed deeply, exhausted. She always felt exhausted these days, running on steam. It was like that after the blizzard, too. Although then she had Rapunzel to lean on, but it was only selfish to do so now.
She had never been one for intuition or prophecy, but she could not shake the feeling that they were headed to disaster with smiles on their faces.
“We aren’t going to the tower, are we?” Rapunzel’s oddly harsh voice snapped her out of her thoughts, and she looked back, surprised to see the amnesiac princess glaring at her.
“What?” She asked.
“You said we were headed north, but we’re not,” Rapunzel said, expression angry and betrayed. “I chart stars, I know.” She gestured to the sky, and Eileen felt her heart sink.
“Hey, look, I can explain-” Eileen stood up, but Rapunzel rushed forward, grabbing the blue book and darting back before Eileen could react.
“You did use some kind of magic on me, didn’t you?!” She demanded.
“No, no, that was the ruffians! I saved you from them, remember?” Eileen said desperately.
“Maybe you did,” Rapunzel said, her voice rising. “But only because you wanted my hair for yourself! And to think,” She looked incredibly bitter, and it hurt. “I risked my life to get you that spice! Mother was right about everything!”
“No, she-” Eileen stepped forward, but Rapunzel was quicker, flinging out her hair and knocking Eileen back roughly. She fell back with a surprised shout, and Rapunzel took off, disappearing into the night.
“Oh, Christ, oh no…” Eileen scrambled to her feet. “Rapunzel, Rapunzel wait! I can explain!”
She ran off in the direction she thought Rapunzel had run off in, but the woods were black and crowded, and she lost her way just as quickly. Rapunzel-or at least fresh-out-of-the-tower-era-Rapunzel-was equal parts likely to die within the first five minutes and also equally likely to thrive out in the woods like some kind of wild woman.
“Rapunzel!” She shouted again, but of course she got no answer. There was an irritated noise above her, and she looked up to see an owl staring at her with a disapproving glare.
“Owl?” She asked, relieved to see Cassandra’s bird. Owl hooted again, swooping down and grabbing Eileen’s arm a bit too tightly, trying to drag her forward. “Okay, okay, I’m coming!” Eileen swatted at the bird. “Are the others close?”
Owl hooted, and then took off into the forest, glancing back every so often to make sure Eileen was still behind him.
She rounded a corner, and slammed painfully into Cassandra. She yelped, stumbling back with a wince. “Watch it!”
“Rapunzel ran into us-” She motioned to herself and Lance, who also emerged from the bushes with a passed out Shorty under his arm. “-called us ruffians, and bolted. What did you do?”
“Why do you assume I had anything to do with it?” Eileen asked.
“It’s always you, Ellie.” Cassandra said tiredly. Pascal chittered on her shoulder.
“That’s entirely untrue,” Eileen said, stung in spite of the situation. “But this time maybe it was kind of my fault.”
“Kind of?” Cassandra raised her eyebrow.
“Entirely. But that’s not the point!” Eileen waved her arms. “Look, there was this weird wand, she lost her memories, she thinks she never left the tower! She doesn’t know who we are!”
“Wait-permanently?!” Lance looked startled.
“No! I’ve been working on this potion thing, but she bolted before I could finish it.” Eileen said.
“Oh my God…” Cassandra ran a hand down her face, looking irritated.
“Sorry.” Eileen said sheepishly.
“We’ll cover more ground if we split up. Come on, we gotta get her before she hurts herself.” Cassandra said, and Owl landed on her shoulder. Pascal squeaked, still a little scared of his possible predator, and leapt to Eileen.
“This is the Rapunzel that’s never been outside though, right?” Lance asked. “We have the upper hand!”
“I sure hope so.” Cassandra said darkly, and then disappeared into the woods.
Eileen sighed, and then caught Pascal glaring at her.
“Hey, it was an accident! I feel bad enough!”
*** *** ***
“Stupid magic.” She muttered, and ducked under a low hanging tree branch.
She offered her hand to Pascal, and he climbed on. “Go see if you can get a better view, maybe you can see her.” Pascal squeaked, scurrying up a tree.
She set off again, freezing when she heard a high-pitched scream. “Lance!”
She sprinted forward, coming to a sudden stop when she saw Rapunzel dangling Cassandra and Lance over a river by her hair. Cassandra looked irritated, but Lance looked horrified, his eyes on the shapes churning the water, sharp teeth and mean red eyes staring up at them-
“Piranhas?!” Eileen said shrilly. “Why the hell are there piranhas?!”
Rapunzel whirled around at her voice, glaring fiercely. “You! You lied to me!”
“No!” Eileen said. “Yes! Only a little!”
“Nice cover, Ellie.” Cassandra grumbled.
“Can we please not do this now?! Please?!”
Rapunzel still looked furious, and Eileen relented. “Alright, alright, yes! I did lie, I used magic on you, but this potion-” She fumbled with the vial she had managed to fill. “-will fix it and bring back your memories.”
Rapunzel leaned away. “Memories?”
“I…” Eileen wilted slightly. “I erased some of your memories. I-I didn’t mean to, I just...look, I’m not a fan of talking about...emotions and stuff. It’s...icky. And I didn’t want to burden you with anything, so I just...kept it all in until I snapped and something bad happened.”
“How do I know you’re not just lying?” Rapunzel asked.
“I…” Eileen juggled the vial between her hands, and then realized she probably shouldn’t do that. “Friends just have a way of knowing.” She offered the vial to Rapunzel, silently begging any higher power that might be listening to throw her a bone just this once.
After what felt like a million years, Rapunzel’s eyes softened, and she took the vial, nervous but trusting.
The branch she had attached her hair to snapped, and Cassandra and Lance dropped into the water. Cassandra used Rapunzel’s remaining hair to swing herself safely to shore, but Lance didn’t have the same luck, falling into the water with a shriek.
Eileen winced, rushing forward to help. “Why didn’t you tell me about the piranhas?!”
“Didn’t think it was important,” Cassandra said shortly, helping drag a rather bitten up Lance out of the water. “But I always underestimate your talent for getting into shit.”
*** *** ***
“So the spell...undid the healing?” Rapunzel asked, staring at the long white scar on Eileen’s palm.
“Essentially,” She said, resisting the urge to stuff her hand in her pockets. “I mean, I don’t know why, obviously.”
“And your stomach…?” Rapunzel trailed off, and Eileen bit her lip.
“...the second time, yeah. But I’m alright!” She said quickly, seeing Rapunzel’s stricken look. “Really, I promise. Doesn’t hurt or anything. And I don’t really care about scars or whatever.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Rapunzel asked.
“I…” Eileen sighed. “I didn’t want to worry you, for one.”
“You worried me more by how distant you were.” Rapunzel said.
“Obviously, yeah. I should have seen that coming. Hindsight is twenty-twenty, right?” She smiled without much enthusiasm, and then sighed. “And...it really scared me, I guess. Not just because of the whole, you know, bleeding out thing, but also...nevermind, it’s dumb-”
“Eileen.” Rapunzel said softly.
Eileen sighed again. “I just...obviously we’ve faced a lot of crazy stuff on this trip. But this was the first time where...it was something bigger. Bigger than us. And we don’t know what exactly these rocks are leading us to. What their intentions are, if they have any. And I just have a really bad feeling about it.”
Rapunzel was quiet. “I’m scared too,” She admitted. “But...we have each other, right? I don’t think there’s anything we can’t do if we all work together.”
“Work with Cassandra? Ugh.” Eileen made a face, and Rapunzel laughed. Just a little, but it was there.
“We’ll be alright.” Rapunzel declared, and Eileen found it difficult to disagree with her confidence. At least out loud. She hopped down, looping her arm through Eileen’s. “Now come on. The wagon’s back together, and we still have a long way to go.”
Notes:
this is basically the last fluffy chapter until the end of the series, the next chapter is essentially straight horror and i love it
AND HOLY SHIT HAPPY TENTH ANNIVERSARY FOR TANGLED I FORGOT ABOUT IT OH NO IM GONNA TRY TO RELEASE A ONESHOT BUT LIKE WE'LL SEE OH GOD HOW DID I FORGET
Chapter 10: The Other Eileen
Notes:
this is my favorite episode in the series and i had wayyyy too much fun writing this and taking liberties with the imposters
i was listening to magnus archives episode 79 and was like "yeah, i should use this"
and if you know what that means im sorry in advance for this chapter
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Rain fell down from the sky in buckets, and it quickly became evident that the wagon hadn’t been built for such weather, although that seemed silly now.
Most of them were crammed inside the wagon, taking shifts with who had to brave the storm and drive. Eileen was busy trying to take a nap, but the uneven road and cracks of thunder made it difficult to do so.
A drop of water fell on her forehead, and she sighed. “That’s the fourth leak.”
“Then get a bucket, Ellie.” Cassandra said, busy pretending to fend off an invisible enemy with her sword. She was improving with her non-dominant hand daily. “It’s not rocket science.”
“We’re out of buckets.”
“Then get a bowl.”
“What if I need the bowl later?”
“We have more than one bowl, believe it or not.”
“We wouldn’t need to worry about this if we didn’t have these damn leaks,” Eileen grumbled, finally sitting up so she could glare at Cassandra properly. “Who the hell made this piece of shit?”
Cassandra opened her mouth to argue, and then turned to Rapunzel with a scowl. Rapunzel was hunched over her journal, scribbling something. Her pen scratched loudly. “Again with the scratching!” Cassandra snapped. “What could you possibly be writing now?!”
“You’re gonna get on me for the scratching but not on Lance for his constant whistling?!” Rapunzel asked.
As if on cue, Lance poked his head into the wagon, soaking wet. “Eileen, it’s your turn to drive.”
“It most definitely is not,” She argued. “I’ve got another fifteen minutes.”
“What? No! I’m not driving this thing anymore, it’s my turn to take a break!” Lance said.
“Look,” Rapunzel said, adopting her peacemaker voice which seemed to be coming out more and more often these days. “I know our little ticks and habits are getting on each others’ nerves because we’re all stuck in here together...but on the bright side, we’re all stuck in here together!”
Eileen opened her mouth to argue, but suddenly the wagon tilted dramatically, and she fell out of her bunk, slamming into the wall with a surprised shout. She heard Maximus and Fidella whinny outside.
Rapunzel managed to recover first, grabbing a blanket and throwing it over her head to investigate the drama outside. Eileen gingerly poked her head out, seeing a large tree had fallen in front of the wagon. Rapunzel kneeled down in the muddy road, looking frustrated.
Thunder crashed, and she rushed back into the wagon. “The wheel’s stuck in the mud. And the road’s blocked.” She said grimly.
“I guess we’ll have to wait out the storm here.” Cassandra said.
“Oh God.” Eileen said.
Rapunzel squinted, peering out of the condensation covered windows. “Maybe not.” She muttered.
Eileen followed her gaze, seeing a large mansion that looked like it was made out of seashells just visible above the treeline. Cassandra frowned. “I know what you’re thinking, but that place creeps me out.”
“Lemme see.” Eileen said, squeezing between the two.
Cassandra growled. “Could you be any more annoying?”
“Is that a challenge?” Eileen grinned.
“Look, Raps, I can see where this is going,” Cassandra said. “You’re going to say something like ‘That shell house looks like a warm, dry place’. And then I say ‘Let’s not rush into anything, we should be careful’-”
“Yeah, great speech.” Eileen said, ducking out and following the others to the shell house. She heard Cassandra groan behind them, but she followed.
The rain was cold, and coming down hard enough to sting. Within seconds she was drenched, and shivered. “Ugh.” She grumbled, following Rapunzel up to the house. She quickly took the harnesses off of Maximus and Fidella, and the two shook themselves off, spraying water everywhere.
Rapunzel tapped the door knocker on the door twice, and stepped back. A shadow moved behind the orange tinted window, and the door creaked open. “Hi!” Rapunzel said, giving her brightest smile. “So sorry to bother you, but our wagon is stuck in the mud.”
The door opened a little more, and there was a tall man with white hair and a thin mustache. “A carriage stuck in the mud,” He said in a thick French accent. “Is a carriage that’s quite a dud.”
Eileen blinked.
“It’s a rhyme,” The man explained, as if that was the reason for the questioning looks. “Look how wet you all are. Do you suppose it is because of the rain?”
“Uh,” Rapunzel said. “May we come in?”
“Ah, of course!” The man said, stepping aside. “My name is Matthews, and you are all welcome. Except the horses,” He added, seeing Maximus and Fidella. “They shed too much and get hoof prints all over the carpet. Oui? Stable for you!” He pointed, and with an irritated snort, the two horses set off towards where Matthews was pointing.
Eileen ducked inside, immediately grateful for the roaring fire in the center of the room. It was open and eerily empty except for a few massive shell decorations, and a stairway leading up and away. “Wow,” Rapunzel said, looking around. “This place is amazing!”
“It is, but so are pockets,” Matthews said. “You can put anything in one, as long as it’s smaller than the pocket itself. I like to put my hands in mine.” He started walking up the steps, and Eileen wondered vaguely what was going through his mind.
“Right, okay,” Rapunzel said, following him. “So this place is made entirely out of shells?”
“I see you’ve noticed,” Matthews said. “Let me guess. You must be the genius of the group, oui? Indeed, a large shell out in the forest doesn’t seem to belong, but then again, neither do you. And yet here you are!”
He motioned to a room down the hall. “There are refreshments in the lounge and rooms enough for all of you.”
“Thank you so much, Mr. Matthews,” Rapunzel said. “And don’t worry, you won’t even know we’re-”
“Hey, Shorty, no!” Eileen said suddenly, snatching two blue glass balls away from the man’s hands and setting them back into the basket. Lance grabbed three more glass balls and began to juggle them.
“Hey, you too! You’re gonna drop them!” Eileen said. She snatched the glass balls away.
“Stop scolding him, Ellie.” Cassandra said.
“Thank you, Cass.”
“Stay out of this, Lance!”
Rapunzel chuckled nervously. “I-it’s so beautiful here! What is this place?”
Matthews smiled, pleased. “It’s called, ‘The House of Yesterday’s Tomorrow’.”
“So...today then.” Rapunzel said.
Matthews chuckled. “I never use one word when two can be used, right, correct?”
“Uh,” Rapunzel said. “Sure.”
Matthews smiled widely. “Here are the guest bedrooms,” He motioned to a row of doors on his side. “Please, enjoy your stay! However long that may be.”
*** *** ***
The table in the dining hall was massive, and curved oddly, the middle dipping like an oyster shell. There were enough seats to seat the entire Coronan castle staff, but the group merely clustered at the far end. Matthews had set out a feast for them, and the group was making the most of it.
“Can you quit reaching over me?” Cassandra snapped at Eileen when she reached across to grab pepper.
“Yeah, like you’ll give it to me,” Eileen grinned. “Plus, it bugs you.”
Cassandra opened her mouth to start a fight, but the seat next to Rapunzel pulled out, and Shorty hopped up, laying a napkin on his lap and neatly starting to cut up the slice of ham on his plate.
An odd silence fell over the table as Shorty delicately dabbed his lip with a napkin. “Ah, Shorty, you’re using a napkin instead of...nothing.” Rapunzel said slowly.
“Huh,” Shorty said. “So I am. Please pass the bread.”
Eileen glanced down at the basket of rolls, looking unsure. Cassandra slowly grabbed it, passing it over. Shorty grabbed a roll. “Thank you.”
“Thank you?” Rapunzel repeated, puzzled.
Shorty’s eyes widened as if he had revealed a secret. “Er, beard! Yam!”
Rapunzel coughed. “Shorty, are you feeling alright?”
Shorty didn’t answer, pretending to be busy with his food, but he looked...incredibly nervous.
Rapunzel caught Eileen’s eye and jerked her head to the other room.
*** *** ***
“What do you mean ‘something’s wrong with Shorty’?” Eileen asked.
“Didn’t you see him at dinner?” Rapunzel whispered. “Perfect posture. Impeccable manners. His breath wasn’t...nauseating.”
“Maybe he’s drunk.” Eileen shrugged.
“He’s always drunk.”
“Then maybe he’s more drunk than usual. Or less drunk. I don’t know, maybe this is sober Shorty,” Eileen shrugged. “You’re starting to sound like Cass.”
“I’m serious,” Rapunzel said fervently. “Something isn’t right. It’s almost like someone else is pretending to be Shorty-oh wait wait, here he comes, quick!” She grabbed Eileen’s arm, dragging her around into a closet as Shorty approached.
Rapunzel cracked it open, peering out as Shorty approached a large mirror at the end of the hall. There wasn’t anything special about it, and they hadn’t even noticed it until now. “What’s he doing?” Rapunzel whispered.
“I don’t know, it’s Shorty,” Eileen said. “His mind is a mystery I’m scared to think about. Look, I don’t think I’m seeing anything weird.”
“Hey, Shorty.” Lance’s voice echoed from down the hall.
“Well,” Shorty said, turning with an odd expression on his face. “If it isn’t my stalwart companion, Lance Wardington.”
Eileen and Rapunzel glanced at each other.
“You’re looking particularly dapper,” Shorty said, and gestured to the mirror. “Take a look at yourself.”
Lance chuckled, leaning forward to examine himself in the mirror. “I wear the same thing everyday, but thank you for noticing-”
Shorty sprang forward with sudden, non-drunk agility, pushing Lance forward. Lance shouted in surprise, but instead of crashing into the mirror, he went through it, as if falling into water.
Rapunzel barely held in a gasp, and Eileen stiffened.
After a moment, Lance walked out of the mirror. But...it wasn’t him. His eyes were a blank red, and in a way that couldn’t even be described, he was just wrong.
“Oh, dear God.” Eileen whispered.
“What…” Rapunzel felt sick. “What is that?!”
“I don’t know! Why are you asking me?!” Eileen hissed, but her voice was far more panicked than irritated.
“We have to find out what these things are.” Rapunzel said. Pascal squeaked in agreement from her shoulder. “But we have to be careful.”
“Careful, right, got it. Or else we might get pushed into the magic mirror and replaced. Just another day, right?” Eileen said. She cracked her knuckles, and it oddly sounded like popcorn. “I got this.”
“Wait-” Rapunzel said, but it was too late. Eileen burst out of the closet, reaching for Shorty.
“Alright, you fake motherfucker-” She started, but Shorty grabbed her with sudden untold strength, throwing her against the wall so hard the shell pattern cracked.
“Eileen!” Rapunzel gasped.
“Ow.” Eileen managed to say.
Rapunzel rushed to her, and the fake Shorty and Lance approached, eyes blank and hard. “Back off!” Rapunzel said, though she wasn’t all too confident in her abilities to fight them off.
Pascal squeaked to get her attention, and she saw a coral chandelier above the two imposters, and she yanked out a thick strand of hair, throwing it up to the chandelier and yanking it down. It fell on top of the imposters, and with a yelp, they went still, incapacitated.
“Dear Lord.” Eileen managed to say, standing up.
*** *** ***
“So…” Cassandra said, staring at the two imposters tied up in the dining hall. “Lance and Shorty...aren’t Lance and Shorty?”
“You had to be there, trust me,” Eileen said. “But that Shorty knocked me down. I once saw the real Shorty lose a fight with a trout. On dry land.”
“So where are the real Lance and Shorty?” Cassandra asked.
“I don’t know,” Rapunzel said. “But I think that they’re trapped in the mirror down the hall. Somehow.”
Cassandra sighed. “This is just insane.”
“It is insane,” The imposter Shorty spoke up. “Don’t believe her, Cassandra, she’s crazy.”
“Look!” Eileen said. “Right there! A coherent sentence! Is that out of character or what?!”
“Of course, the question becomes, if they’re not really them, how do we know the rest of us are who we say we are?” Rapunzel asked.
A heavy silence fell over them, suddenly punctuated by thunder outside. “If we’re gonna get our friends back, we need to know who to trust,” Rapunzel said. “So we have to conduct some tests to make sure there are no more imposters.”
“Hold on, you’re going to conduct tests?” Cassandra asked. “You could be a mirror person too.”
Rapunzel frowned. “You’re right...how do you want to test me?”
Cassandra and Eileen glanced at each other, seeming uncertain. Pascal scuttled away from them. Eileen slid a plate of cold food over to Rapunzel. “The real Rapunzel can find art even in the dullest situations,” She said. “So...go ahead.” She gestured.
“Hm…” Rapunzel stared at it. “Okay, let’s see...oh!”
She dove onto the food, not noticing Cassandra and Eileen’s slightly disgusted looks. She molded the food together carefully into her design, not realizing the mess she was making.
“There!” She said finally, grinning at the castle made of food scraps.
“A diorama of Corona,” Eileen said, and smiled. “Hm...alright, I’m convinced.”
“Did you have to make her challenge so messy?” Cassandra asked.
Pascal passed his test of turning various colors, although the quickly changing commands of what to turn to seemed to exhaust him slightly. Eileen passed her tests of rapid fire questions on the castle residents and Maximus’ eating habits.
“I was going to write in my journal to see if the noise bothered you, but I must have left it in the wagon,” Rapunzel told Cassandra. “But! I found you this!” She pulled out an apple and handed it to Cassandra. “So, Cass, chop it into eight perfect slices.”
Cassandra paused, only for a moment. “Now?”
Rapunzel narrowed her eyes. “Yes. Now.”
“I could break something.” Cassandra said.
“You’ve got room.” Eileen said, glaring at her.
Cassandra sighed. She walked back a few paces to give herself room, threw the apple in the air and-
-swung the sword down, freeing the imposters. She turned to them, her eyes a blank red, her grin a bit too wide, a bit too wrong.
“Shit!” Eileen shouted, shooting to her feet. “She’s got a sword!”
Pascal squeaked in alarm, and Rapunzel took off, following Eileen down the hall. Rapunzel grabbed Eileen’s arm, yanking her around the corner and into a closet. The imposters thundered past, and Rapunzel let out a tiny sigh of relief.
“Dear Lord, that was close…” Eileen said. “Back in the closet again, yippee.” She paused, and smiled. “There’s a self-deprecating joke in there somewhere.
“We’re outnumbered now.” Rapunzel said.
“We still have the chameleon,” Eileen said. “We’ve got him, right?”
Rapunzel stiffened, panic suddenly shooting through her stomach. “Did...did you just call Pascal a chameleon?” She always called him a lizard, a frog when she felt like bugging him a bit, and a scaly bastard when she was goofing around.
Never, never once, had she called Pascal a chameleon.
“So what?” Eileen asked, shifting slightly. Something fell out from her jacket.
“That’s…” Rapunzel felt sick. “That’s my journal.”
Eileen frowned. “So it is.”
Rapunzel pushed her out of the closet, panic rising in her. “That’s how you knew all my secrets!”
“What? No, I was just keeping it for you.” Eileen looked surprised by the accusation.
“And you never say ‘dear Lord,” Rapunzel said, panic mounting. “You think it sounds too upper class.”
“Rapunzel, come on, you’re acting irrational-” Eileen tried to approach her, but Rapunzel backed up quickly.
“Do the boot trick.” Rapunzel said.
“Pardon?” Eileen asked.
“Do the trick!” Rapunzel demanded. Eileen was so damn proud of being able to pop her knife out of her boot, she did it just for the fun of it, grinning to herself when she did. It was goofy, but so, so endearing.
Eileen opened her mouth, closed it, and...sighed, as though disappointed. A smile slowly spread across her face, and it sent chills down Rapunzel’s spine. She ran her hand through her hair, as if testing the length. Her scar wasn’t big enough, Rapunzel realized. “I was still last to be found out, so I still think I did well.” Eileen said, or whatever was pretending to be her said.
Not-Eileen stretched out her hands, examining her fingers. “She was a hard one to pin down, but I had you going pretty good, didn’t I?” She caught sight of Rapunzel’s face and giggled. (Eileen never giggled, she would have found it demeaning-)
“You should see your face now,” She said, and then perked up. “Oh, you can!” She twisted unnaturally, and Rapunzel gasped in horror, stepping back.
A perfect copy of herself smiled at her, looking overjoyed. “It’s like this,” She said, still in Eileen’s voice, and then pulled a face of open terror. “Or maybe like this-” She made a slightly different, equally terrified face.
“Apologies for my friends’ lackluster performances,” She said, shifting back to Eileen with more horrible twisting. “I don’t know why they’re so awful. Usually we’re more in sync, but, well, it’s been a while, and they’re a bit out of practice.”
“I...what are you?!” Rapunzel demanded.
“Labels are overrated,” Not-Eileen shrugged, nonchalant as ever. “But I suppose you could call me a changeling. And before you ask,” She held up a hand. “No, I can’t show you my real form. I don’t have one, not really. And if I did, it’s long forgotten. And it’s so much more fun to be other people anyway!”
“When did you take Eileen?!” Rapunzel demanded.
“Oh, this is so embarrassing for you,” Not-Eileen giggled, and the sound made Rapunzel want to scream. “Blondie, she was the first one to look into my mirror.”
“No,” Rapunzel said automatically, wanting to scream at the imposter for the use of the nickname. “No, she...I would have known.”
“I guess not,” Not-Eileen said. “And she made such a fuss, too! Kicking, screaming...nearly broke my nose. That would have sort of ruined the act, wouldn’t it? And you didn’t even hear her!”
“You...you let Shorty throw you!” Rapunzel said.
“What can I say?” Not-Eileen spread her arms and smiled. “I’m committed to the role. I had to keep up appearances until we could get to you.”
“Where are they?!” Rapunzel demanded, realizing her back was to the wall.
“Oh, tucked away safely,” Not-Eileen giggled, slowly approaching Rapunzel like a lion stalking its prey. “I like to have the set together before I do away with them.”
Rapunzel’s hand brushed something hard, and without thinking, she grabbed it, swinging it at the imposter.
Not-Eileen’s eyes widened, and she tried to step back, but it was too late. Rapunzel hit her knee with a fire poker, and the changeling fell to the ground with a garbled, distorted scream.
She looked up at Rapunzel with open hate, eyes going red. “You fucking bitch-!”
Rapunzel swung the poker again, and Not-Eileen was too late once again to block it. The blow landed hard on her face, and Rapunzel heard something crunch. She wailed in fury again, voice still Eileen’s but now also mixed with what sounded like hundreds of voices, all cursing her at the same time.
“I’LL KILL YOU! I’LL KILL YOU, YOU BITCH! I’LL KILL THEM ALL!” She screamed, managing to look up at her. Her face was smashed disgustingly, jutting inward, but there was no blood.
Rapunzel stumbled back, nauseated. She heard footsteps coming towards the room, and she ran. “HERE! HERE! GET HER, YOU USELESS FUCKERS! GET HER!” Not-Eileen screamed. Rapunzel didn't bother looking back, her heart racing.
She dove behind a large, decorative seashell. There was soft talking from the other room, and then she heard a grunt of pain that sounded like Eileen, and uneven footsteps. “The bitch broke my leg and face,” She heard the changeling mutter. “I am going to enjoy killing them all. One by one.”
Rapunzel hazarded a glance and felt bile rise in her throat. Not-Eileen’s broken body stood lopsided, leg stretched at an odd angle. Her face was still smashed in, and she twitched, not as though it was in pain, more so like she was uncomfortable with her clothing and couldn’t wait to set things right.
And there was not a single drop of blood in her body.
“Find her,” Not-Eileen said savagely. “And bring her to me. I want to see her scream.” She jerked, wincing slightly.
“What about the others?” The one pretending to be Shorty asked.
“You go watch the mirror yourself if you’re so worried about them escaping,” Not-Eileen snapped, turning her gaze to her comrade, who shrunk away. “And if you fuck this up too, I swear I will make you wish you could die.”
The false Shorty looked genuinely terrified, and Rapunzel almost felt sorry for him. He jerked his head in a nod and rushed away. Not-Eileen turned to the other two and nodded. “Find her.”
The false Lance and Cassandra split, and Not-Eileen sighed. She bent down, grabbing her leg and jerking it harshly back into place with a loud CRACK. She grunted in something like pain, and then stood up straight.
Rapunzel ducked behind the seashell again, having to cover her mouth to keep from throwing up.
“Rapunzel!” Not-Eileen called out, her voice ringing in the hallways. Rapunzel could hear her uneven gait, stepping closer. “That was mean, you know. Very mean. Do you have any idea how long it takes to regenerate bones? Shorter than your friends, of course, but it’s still such an awful nuisance…”
She jerked and twitched, as if on the verge of a seizure. She made a face as though She were about to sneeze, and her previously smashed nose popped back into place with a wet crunch.
“Come out, Rapunzel,” She said softly. “I promise…” She paused, and then laughed. “I can’t promise I won’t hurt them, of course. But I can promise to hurt them less.”
Pascal pressed against Rapunzel’s shoulder, looking terrified. “You’re only delaying the inevitable,” Not-Eileen said. “Do you think you’re the first person to try and get away? You’re merely the latest in a long line, although I have to admit, you’ve lasted longer than most. We’ll get you, drag you back, and watch as you waste away. And it’s going to be so much fun.”
The worst part was that the thing still used Eileen’s voice. It was a perfect match, except for the fact that Eileen’s voice (gruff and sarcastic but her laugh sounded like a flute when she was really happy-) was filled with a sadistic, cruel glee that was completely alien. The screaming had been bad. The laughter had been bad. But hearing her voice (Eileen’s voice) speak of carnage and mutilation with such open glee made Rapunzel want to throw up.
Not-Eileen paused, observing her reflection in a shiny shell. “You know,” She muttered. “I think I rather like this form. Maybe I’ll keep it.”
“Once I get rid of that girl, of course,” Not-Eileen said breezily, as if this were a minor concern. “Can’t have two of us running around, can you? I suppose I’ll have to practice that little trick you mentioned.”
She giggled hysterically, turning a corner and limping away.
Rapunzel counted to one hundred, and then sprinted down the corridor, careful to keep her steps silent. Pascal chittered quietly on her shoulder, and she nodded. “I know, I know. The mirror.”
She raced to the mirror, pausing when she saw Shorty’s imposter sitting in front of it. She grabbed one of the blue glass balls, and tossed it away. It shattered down the hall, and the imposter jumped up. “Hello?!” He called, and then rushed after the source of the sound.
The second he was gone, Rapunzel rushed to the mirror. She couldn’t see her own reflection, just the hallway behind her. “Hello?! She whispered, touching the glass softly. She felt near a breakdown.
Cassandra’s face appeared in the mirror, talking rapidly, though Rapunzel couldn’t hear what she was saying. “Cass!” She felt tears rise to her eyes, and nearly sobbed when Lance appeared next to her, and then Eileen, who was talking rapidly, an annoyed expression on her face and she was okay that thing hadn’t hurt her-
“Where’s Shorty?” She asked, though she was fairly certain they couldn’t hear her.
Eileen seemed to get the message, and jerked her head back behind her. He’s asleep, she said, and Rapunzel laughed in spite of herself. “I’m gonna find a way you out, I promise-”
She paused because suddenly Eileen’s face went slack, and she was pounding uselessly on the mirror, yelling something Rapunzel couldn’t hear-
Rapunzel jumped away just as Not-Eileen swiped at her. The changeling stumbled against the mirror, and yelped when Eileen somehow managed to grab her, trying to yank her into the mirror. “Dammit-” Not-Eileen said, jerking back.
Eileen was screaming something, red-faced and furious, but Not-Eileen simply laughed, leaning against the wall, face close to the mirror but not quite touching. “I’ll make you watch her die, you ugly bitch,” Not-Eileen said. “I’ll bleed you like a hog.”
Eileen pounded on the mirror, but her double turned her head slowly to Rapunzel, smiling widely. “I see my friend is even more useless than I thought,” She said, twitching oddly. “I wish you could see us at our best, but…” She giggled, and her eyes went red. Her teeth were too big, nails too long and pointed. “But I’m still here, aren’t I? And I...I am the package deal.”
Not-Eileen lunged at her, and Rapunzel only just ducked out of the way. Pascal flicked his tongue, and the creature stumbled away with a look of disgust. Rapunzel took her opportunity, sprinting down the hall, pausing when she came to a large, ornate window. She threw it open, and ignoring the stinging rain and screaming wind, she looped her hair around the windowsill, lowering herself down and out.
Pascal squeaked from her shoulder, and Rapunzel nodded. “Of course we’re not running. We just need them to think we are.” She yanked her hair down, and pressed herself against the house, tying her hair back.
Not-Eileen stuck her head out the window, her looking around, but didn’t see Rapunzel pressed against the house. She frowned, and then shrugged. “Search one more time!” She shouted, presumably to the other changelings behind her. “I want to be sure!”
Rapunzel counted to ten before she forced herself to go back to the front door. She suddenly realized that if the door was locked, she was done for, as she doubted she would be able to climb back through the window without attracting attention-
But the door opened up with a quiet click, and soaked to the bone once again, Rapunzel re-entered the House of Yesterday’s Tomorrow, this time alone except for Pascal.
She paused, half-expecting the monsters to descend on her, but she heard the footsteps getting further away if anything. She ran, managing to tie her hair back up, seeing the mirror at the other end of the hall again.
She rushed towards it, rapping lightly on the glass. “Lance? Cass? Eileen?” She whispered, a paranoid part of her expecting to see Not-Eileen’s wrong face pop up, smeared with blood.
But Eileen’s normal face appeared, and started talking, looking relieved. “I can’t hear you,” Rapunzel whispered, carefully lifting the mirror up. “But I have a plan.”
It was heavier than she expected, and nearly dropped it. Pascal squeaked in alarm, and she grunted. “I know, I know.” She said. She didn’t know what would happen if she dropped it.
Rapunzel carefully set the mirror on the ground, and Eileen looked at her questioningly, Lance peering over her shoulder. Cassandra pushed her aside, and the two started arguing. Oddly, it made Rapunzel almost tear up. She would have given just about anything to hear them argue now. “Hang in there.” She said, and abruptly heard footsteps running towards her.
She threw a long rug over the mirror and backed up, wishing she had had the foresight to bring in her frying pan. Not-Eileen rounded the corner, flanked by her cronies, and smiled. “Well, hello, princess,” She said. “I thought you turned tail and ran.”
“I would never abandon my friends.” Rapunzel said.
“You probably should have.” Not-Eileen said, coming forward, her nails growing sharp and eyes going red. The others followed, eager to tear Rapunzel to shreds.
Rapunzel lunged forward when they were all in position, ripping the carpet off. The demons jumped in unison to avoid it, and Not-Eileen giggled. “Was that your plan? Trip us and run? Very stupid of you.”
“No,” Rapunzel said, seeing movement within the mirror’s surface. “But it distracted you.”
Not-Eileen frowned, and then yelped when the real Eileen suddenly grabbed her ankle and started to drag her down. The others suffered similar fates, looking just as surprised.
“What do we do?!” The fake Cassandra asked.
“Fight them off!” Not-Eileen snapped, managing to take a hopping step towards Rapunzel. She fell to the ground, scrabbling at the ground, making deep gouges in the wood with her claws. “I’ve waited too long to get out,” She said, her voice rising, distorted. “And worked too hard, and killed too many times just to have my escape ruined by some bitch!”
“Don’t call her a bitch!” Eileen’s voice managed to call out, only just audible.
“They’re too strong!” Rapunzel said, and Pascal squeaked, grabbing her hair. Rapunzel nodded, taking out a thick lock and using it to sweep the other demons off their feet. Their real counterparts took the opportunity to yank them back in, and with a gasp, Cassandra, Lance, and Shorty appeared.
“Wow, look at the colors!” Shorty said, and then promptly passed out.
Not-Eileen yanked her foot away, and Rapunzel’s heart thudded to imagine what that meant for Eileen on the other side of the mirror. “That one’s still-” Rapunzel started, but Cassandra was on it, lunging at Not-Eileen with a cry and her sword drawn.
Not-Eileen grunted when the sword ran her through, but rammed herself into Cassandra, yanking the sword out and tossing it aside. “If I’m not leaving,” She hissed, seeming to realize she was outmatched. “Then neither are you!”
She turned and lunged at Rapunzel with an animal-like scream, her claws out and sharpened to a point that was almost dragon-like, red eyes filled with sadism and little else. Rapunzel stepped back, horrified-
Lance grabbed her, and she fell, off balance, and Cassandra managed to grab her other arm. They restrained the changeling, but only barely, Not-Eileen thrashing and screaming, heedless of the hole in her chest.
“You think this is over?!” Not-Eileen wailed, managing to look Rapunzel in the eye. “I’m not going anywhere! I am a nightmare! I am what you will see when you close your eyes, and as long as you live, I will be there!”
“Damn,” Cassandra said, panting from holding the thrashing demon. “She’s almost as annoying as the real Ellie.”
“We need to put her back! Hurry!” Rapunzel said, rushing over.
“Don’t put me back! Don’t you fucking dare put me back!” Not-Eileen screamed even as she was dragged. “DON’T PUT ME BACK!”
A hand shot out, grabbing Not-Eileen’s ankle, and Not-Eileen screamed so loud it made Rapunzel’s ears ring. “NO! PLEASE! I CAN’T GO BACK!” Her eyes became Eileen’s hazel, filled with tears. “Rapunzel, please, it’s me, d-don’t let them hurt me...please, please don’t do this to me!”
Rapunzel faltered, her heart wanting to reach out even though her brain told her not too. But then she saw the barely concealed cruelty behind her eyes, pacing like a caged wild animal, just waiting for an opportunity to get out and hurt people.
Her resolve hardened. “You’re not my friend.”
The imposter’s face fell, and the real Eileen’s other hand grabbed her doppelganger by the shoulder, pushing her down into the mirror. Not-Eileen screamed, long and loud one final time, but it was cut off when her mouth disappeared into the mirror. “Christ, she’s loud.” The real Eileen panted.
“Eileen!” Rapunzel shouted, grabbing Eileen’s hand and dragging her out. “Oh my God-are you okay?!”
“Yeah,” Eileen said. “Those other demons are slow as shit. Couldn’t even catch me.” She grinned, and then gave a soft ‘oomph’ of surprise when Rapunzel threw her arms around her neck, hugging her tightly.
There was pounding from the mirror, and Rapunzel turned and saw Not-Eileen pounding from inside her prison, still screaming, but they could no longer hear it. Wordlessly, Rapunzel went to pick up the mirror, and Eileen went to help her. They placed the mirror so it faced the wall and they could no longer see the changeling.
But they could hear her pounding away nonetheless.
“We should leave,” Lance said. “Like, right now.”
They didn’t, unfortunately, because the storm had turned into a near hurricane, and Rapunzel watched a massive tree uprooted due to it right in front of her.
So they gathered in the foyer to take shifts, unharmed and whole.
But Rapunzel could still hear the pounding from the mirror, hours into the night.
*** *** ***
Eileen woke up to be shaken. “What...what’s wrong? Is something happening?!” She jerked up, startled to see Rapunzel’s distraught face.
“Do the trick.” Rapunzel said.
“Trick-what?” Eileen asked.
“The trick where you pop your knife out of your boot!” Rapunzel said.
“Blondie, it’s the middle of the night. Why-” Eileen trailed off, and bit her lip. “Ah. I see.”
Rapunzel said nothing, but she looked shaky.
“Alright, one second. Let me find my shoes.” Eileen stood up, not missing how Rapunzel leaned away from her, as if worried Eileen might lunge.
“I’m not gonna hurt you.” Eileen said softly, but Rapunzel didn’t respond.
Eileen tugged her shoes on, and slipped her knife into the side. She jerked her knee up in a well-practiced motion, and the knife flew out. She caught it easily by the handle.
Rapunzel visibly relaxed. “I...I’m sorry for waking you up,” She said softly. “I...just had to be sure.”
“No! No, I get it, I’m…” Eileen sighed. “I’m sorry this happened.”
“She kept…” Rapunzel trailed off, and then sighed. “She kept saying how much she wanted to hurt me. And...it was your voice. And I know it wasn’t you, but…”
“It was scary. Yeah, I’d imagine.” Eileen said. She scooted closer, and tried not to look nervous when Rapunzel leaned against her. “But I’m here now. And if you ever get scared, I’m happy to do my little trick a million times for you.”
Rapunzel chuckled. “Thanks.”
Eileen glanced at the rain pounding on the windows. “Hey, I think it’s about my turn to take watch. You should get some sleep.”
“I’m not tired. Still hyped up on adrenaline,” Rapunzel stood up. “I think I’m gonna explore.”
Eileen made a face. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“I’ll be fine. The demons are in the mirror, and I...I need to clear my head.” Rapunzel said.
Eileen slowly nodded. “I’m here if you need me.”
Rapunzel smiled, still shaky but never dull, and went off into the halls to explore.
Eileen sighed, rubbing the remaining sleep from her eyes for her turn on watch.
And since she was on watch, she didn’t see the emblem of a black ram’s head light up, the hollow eye sockets glowing with a green malice, watching Rapunzel.
Notes:
GOD I LOVE THIS IMPOSTER TROPE ITS SO MUCH FUN
Chapter 11: The "G" Word
Notes:
oh god we're approaching a tipping point fasten your seatbelts and put on your gay helmets cause shit is about to get a S A P P H I C
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
It was far too bright, but Rapunzel blinked her eyes open anyway at Cassandra’s bright greeting.
“Good morning,” She said blearily, and blinked when she saw Cassandra. “What’s with your outfit?”
“I know!” Cassandra smoothed out the fabric of her handmaiden uniform. Even though Rapunzel was certain she had left it at home. “It’s cute, right?”
“Cass…” Rapunzel paused, suddenly realizing she was not in the House of Yesterday’s Tomorrow, nor in the caravan. “We’re...home?”
“Where else would we be?” Cassandra chuckled.
“I-” Rapunzel passed a mirror, and gasped. “My hair! What happened to my hair?!”
It was dark brown, choppy and uneven because of the mirror shard. For some reason, she thought of Eileen’s apology that she hadn’t done a better job. And when Rapunzel had shushed her apology, Eileen had shrugged and said Well, I suppose you’re right, I was dying, after all…
“It looks like just a mild case of bedhead,” Eileen said, striding in and leaning against the door with an easy grin that...well, Rapunzel hadn’t seen it in a while. “You’ve had worse, I’m sure. Morning, Cassandra!”
“Morning, Ellie!” Cassandra said back brightly, and instead of scowling at the nickname, Eileen chuckled.
Rapunzel blinked. Had they done something wrong and were trying to ease her into it?
“Looks like someone’s got pre-coronation jitters.” Cassandra said, elbowing Eileen good-naturedly.
“Coronation?” Rapunzel asked. “What are you talking about?!”
“Very fun-” Eileen paused, noticing Eileen’s expression. “Wait, you’re serious? Er, Sunshine, it’s your coronation weekend! Are you alright?”
“Yeah, I just…” She ran her hand through her short hair, testing the length. “This isn’t...how things are supposed to be! The coronation already happened. My blonde hair is back. We left Corona almost a year ago to go to the Dark Kingdom!”
“Damn, that’s a detailed dream,” Eileen said. “The coronation that has yet to happen and...Dark Kingdom? What’s that? Sounds creepy.”
“It felt...so real,” Rapunzel said, and saw Pascal staring at her. “But…” She held out her hand, and he climbed on. “Everything here seems so perfect, it must...just be a really weird dream.”
“Well Raps,” Cassandra said. “You know I love goofing around with you two, but it's a big day and we have to stay on schedule. So whaddya say we get this day started already?”
*** *** ***
Something...shifted, if that was even a word, and Rapunzel winced. Her head hurt.
Her father had left her in the war room (no, not war room, not here. The party planning room) after telling her with great sincerity how much he loved her, and how proud he was of her.
It was like a fracture in a mirror, almost imperceptible and easy to ignore if she wanted to, but there all the same, wheelding in the back of her mind like a splinter. She frowned, turning and gasping when she saw a long train of blonde hair suddenly disappear as if being yanked upwards.
She grabbed a sword off of one of the walls, and looked around. “Who are you?! And what do you want?!”
There was movement behind her, and Rapunzel swung the sword, only to be blocked by…
“A frying pan?” Rapunzel looked up, but the stranger holding the pan was obscured by a cloak. “Who are you?! Because that’s...my thing.”
The stranger removed their hood, and…
Rapunzel blinked, staring at a mirror image of herself, except with long blonde hair. “Okay…”
“Try not to freak out.” The other Rapunzel said.
“Try not to-are you one of those monsters?!” She asked shrilly, her mind going to demons that looked like her friends but had sharp nails and even sharper words.
“No!” The other Rapunzel said. “I’m you!”
“I’m...I’m meeting myself?!” Rapunzel asked.
“I know right?” The other Rapunzel said, smiling.
“So neat!” The two said at the same time and started giggling. “You said the same thing I did!” They spoke in unison once again.
“Best...day...ha!” They both grinned victoriously. “You thought I was gonna say ‘ever’, but I stopped!” They frowned slightly now, unable to shake the unison speaking.
“Not to sound conceited or anything,” The other Rapunzel said. “But you are the best.”
“I was gonna say the same thing!”
“I know!”
“Okay,” Rapunzel said. “Okay, amazing as this is, I think I might be starting to lose it.”
“You’re not going crazy,” The other Rapunzel said, her voice suddenly serious. “I know you remember the black rocks, the world outside Corona, your...our destiny!”
“No,” Rapunzel said, fighting down painful thoughts of near misses and what-ifs. “My destiny is here. In Corona.”
“This isn’t Corona,” The other Rapunzel said, taking her shoulders. “This place isn’t real. The real world isn’t easy. It’s in your head. You’re still in the House of Yesterday’s Tomorrow! You’re under a spell!”
“No, no no no,” Rapunzel said, and fractures grew larger, though still not nearly as large to break the picture. “That’s not...not true! I like it here.”
“I know you do,” The other Rapunzel said. “But it’s all a dream. And if you don’t do something soon, you’ll be trapped here forever!”
*** *** ***
“Rapunzel!” Eileen called, wandering the halls the next morning. “Rapunzel, hey!”
“Remind me why you didn’t try to stop her from wandering the death house?” Cassandra asked.
“I thought she just wanted some space!” Eileen said helplessly, although she felt silly for not protesting it now.
“We’ll cover more ground if we split up,” Cassandra said, and Owl landed on her shoulder. “Ellie, Lance, you take that hallway. Owl and I’ll take this one.”
“Who died and made you queen?” Eileen asked.
“Do you really want me to answer that question?” Cassandra asked, and Eileen winced at the implications. “Just go.” She started down the opposite way before anyone could argue, and Eileen sighed.
“Fine, whatever.” She snapped, and she went the other way with Lance.
(Cassandra found herself a door, of course, a metal one filled with whispers, pain, false promises and the beginnings of an Iscariot move. But who was there to see it?)
Eileen paused at a door with a ram head in the front, the empty eye sockets glowing bright green. “This door gives me the creeps.” Lance said.
Eileen stiffened when she saw a shadow pass underneath it. “There’s-look! Someone’s in there! Rapunzel!” She pushed open the door before Lance could tell her not to, charging in. “Rapunzel, are you-holy shit!”
Rapunzel was lying on some kind of stone table, covered in vines. Pascal rattled in the cage above her, fighting to escape.
Her eyes were closed, and she wasn’t moving.
“Rapunzel!” Eileen shouted, terror spiking through her. She darted forward, but someone stepped in front of her.
“Less noise, sh sh!” Matthews said, grinning far too widely.
“You!” Eileen said, jerking her knee. The knife flew into her hand, and she gripped it tightly. “I knew you were a slimy son of a bitch-”
“Oh,” Matthews said, looking far too pleased. “My dearest Eileen, you have no idea.”
Vines sprung out of the ground, slamming Eileen and Lance into the wall. They twisted Eileen’s hand, and with a cry, she dropped the knife. “Matthews!” Lance shouted, but it was pinched.
“Not quite,” Matthews smiled, and his eyes lit up, as well as the rest of his body. “I am Tromus!” There was now a floating spectre in the place of Matthews, and Eileen couldn’t conceal her gasp.
“And my master, Zhan Tiri, has a great need for this little sundrop!” He smiled, leaning over Rapunzel. “Once these vines wrap around her completely, she’ll have surrendered to the dream world, and the Sundrop’s limitless power will belong to Zhan Tiri!”
“I swear to God, if you don’t let her go right now-Rapunzel! Blondie, wake up!” Eileen shrieked.
Tromus laughed. “The only way that is going to happen is if she wakes herself up. But…” He cooed. “Will she want to leave paradise?” He chuckled, and Eileen watched helplessly as vines stretched and climbed over Rapunzel’s still form.
“Probably not.” Tromus said, and cackled.
*** *** ***
“The only way to escape dream Corona is to go where the Sunflower once grew-” The other Rapunzel said.
“And grab the black rocks?” Rapunzel asked uncertainty. She shook her head. “Wait, no no, this is nuts. You’re not even real!”
“You’re right!” The other Rapunzel said, maybe a tad too brightly. “I’m not! We’re so smart! Come on,” She started to drag Rapunzel towards the door. “We don’t have much time.”
Rapunzel made a face. “I...don’t know. What about the coronation?”
Rapunzel frowned. “If you decide to put the crown on, it will mean that you accept this world, and you’ll be stuck here forever!”
Rapunzel winced as the fractures grew ever so larger.
*** *** ***
“Rapunzel!” Eileen shouted when she saw her stir weakly.
Tromus frowned. “Ugh, seems as though her subconscious self is acting up…” He smiled cruelly, and Eileen felt sick. “Time to tip the scales.”
*** *** ***
“Listen-” The other Rapunzel said, but she suddenly blinked out of existence when Eileen threw open the door.
“Rapunzel!” She looked happy. “There you are.”
“Eileen!” Rapunzel said. “You are not gonna believe this, she was right there! Me! Well, not me, but me, you know? With my hair back, and she wanted me to lead her to the black rocks.”
“The what?” Eileen walked up next to Rapunzel, looking amused. “Sorry, you lost me.” She leaned down, and for a second Rapunzel was confused and then she realized what Eileen was about to do-
She stepped back, startled. “W-what are you doing?”
Eileen looked confused. “What’s wrong? Do I have something on my face?”
“You…” Rapunzel paused for a second, oddly breathless and dizzy. “You were going to kiss me.”
“Yeah,” Eileen looked even more confused. “I think I’m allowed to kiss my girlfriend.”
“Girlfriend?!” Rapunzel asked.
“Yeah? We’ve been together since the tower, doofus,” She chuckled, and then paused. “Are you alright? Because you’re acting kind of funny.”
“I-I-” Rapunzel stuttered, at a loss for words, suddenly realizing that she very much liked the idea of being Eileen’s girlfriend. That she had liked the idea for quite a while, but...but it had never been at the forefront of her mind. Not with everything going on. “No,” She said. “I’m alright.”
Eileen nodded, seemingly convinced, but didn’t try to kiss Rapunzel again. Rapunzel wished she would, but didn’t say anything. “Hey, you know,” Eileen said, brightening. “It’s such a perfect day, why don’t we get some fresh air?”
Rapunzel took a breath, and smiled. “You’re right. I need to clear my head.”
*** *** ***
Rapunzel ignored the distinct feeling of deja vu she felt galloping through the Coronan countryside on Fidella, laughing whenever Eileen yelled something competitive good-naturedly despite the fact that her girlfriend (girlfriend! Eileen was her girlfriend, and she was Eileen’s girlfriend, and it was such a fantastic word, girlfriend, why had she never realized it before?) was falling further and further behind.
She pulled Fidella to a stop at the towering purple wall that lined the border of Corona, smiling widely. She pulled herself to the top of the wall and froze.
“Wow, Pascal…” She said quietly, and Pascal squeaked on her shoulder. “That is…”
The countryside beyond was gray and lifeless, the only changes in the landscape being a few twisting trees that looked as though they were in pain. The wind changed direction, blowing a bit in Rapunzel’s face, and she wrinkled her nose. It smelled like the smoking sticks that some older lords used. What were they called? Cigars?
“Some view.” She finished her thought, and Pascal shrugged, unbothered.
Someone tapped her on the shoulder, and Rapunzel yelped when she saw the blonde other Rapunzel looking at her.
She waved. “Hi!”
“Would you stop materializing everywhere?!” Rapunzel asked, a bit waspishly.
“You can’t keep avoiding me!” The other Rapunzel chuckled. “You know us. We’re persistent.”
“I know, I...love that about us. Usually.” Rapunzel said, and Pascal made an uncertain noise.
The other Rapunzel frowned. “Rapunzel, you need to snap out of this. It’s a tough choice, but you have to make it!”
“Why?!” Rapunzel turned to the ashen countryside. “Look out there! This is where I belong! At home, with my friends and family! With Eileen!”
The other Rapunzel opened her mouth, but disappeared instantly when Eileen poked her head over the side of the wall, climbing up next to Rapunzel. “Thanks for waiting up, and anyway, you only won because Max has a crush on Fidella-are you okay?” She asked, noticing Rapunzel’s expression.
“Y-yeah!” Rapunzel said, maybe a bit too quickly. “I...just thought I saw someone.”
“Saw someone?” Eileen frowned. “All this pressure is getting to you, huh? It probably feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders, but its not. All of us want to help you, make those choices for you. And,” She turned back to Maximus and Fidella. “Speaking of all of us, we should probably get back to the castle for the welcoming ceremony.”
“Besides, nothing to see out there but a whole lot of nothing!” Eileen gestured grandly to the wasteland.
*** *** ***
“Just listen-” The other Rapunzel said, this time so bold as to appear just as Eileen was leaning over to whisper something to Rapunzel over the royal banquet.
“Why are you doing this?!” Rapunzel snapped at her.
Eileen blinked, looking confused. “What? Am I bugging you?” She glanced around, not seeing the other Rapunzel.
“N-no, you’re fine.” Rapunzel said.
“I know leading the team out on the road hasn’t been easy,” The other Rapunzel said, far too audible over the chatter of the banquet hall. “And it would be easier to step back and let someone else make the tough calls. But you know we can’t do that. We have to go back.”
“Even if what you say is true,” Rapunzel said, not noticing the chatter fade slowly as the guests turned to look at her. “Why would I leave all this? Everyone is happy and safe! No one is asking me to make any kind of huge life decisions! Everything is perfect, why would I come with you?!”
“If you don’t, it could literally be the end of the world as we know it.” The other Rapunzel said darkly.
“Well, maybe I don’t want that responsibility!” Rapunzel said. “Maybe I just want to be happy! Is that too much to ask?!”
Eileen tugged her sleeve gently. “Okay, Rapunzel, you’re seriously starting to freak me out. Who are you talking to? Are you alright?”
“Don’t do this.” The other Rapunzel said.
“I’m fine.” Rapunzel said crisply, taking Eileen’s hand. This seemed to satisfy the guests, and they went back to their business. Pushing herself, Rapunzel pecked Eileen’s cheek.
“I’m perfect.” She declared, and the other Rapunzel disappeared.
*** *** ***
“The power of the Sundrop is nearly in Zhan Tiri’s grasp!” Tromus said joyfully.
“How did we not see this bad guy coming?!” Lance said, still straining against the vines.
“Honestly, yeah,” Eileen said. “It’s really on us at this point.”
“We’re usually good at it.” Lance frowned.
Eileen thrashed. “You’ll be begging for mercy when I get free!”
“That’s just it, mon ami,” Tromus grinned. “You shall never be free. And in a few moments, nor shall she!”
*** *** ***
It was dark, but Rapunzel couldn’t sleep, head still buzzing from the day. Everything had been...perfect in the way that it flew by. Fractures still pricked at the back of her mind, but they were fading, and fading fast.
The door to her bedroom opened, and Rapunzel glanced up to see her mother come in with a smile and a large wooden box. “I used to be so much like you,” She said, serenely kind as always. “I had silly dreams of finding adventure and saving the world.”
She took a seat next to Rapunzel, and she once again felt deja vu. “Luckily, I had a place to put those dreams.” Ariana said, handing Rapunzel the box.
Tentatively, she opened it, and smiled when she saw a thick leather book. “My-” She coughed. “A journal!”
She took it out, starting to flip through it, and paused. “It’s...blank?”
Ariana chuckled. “Of course it is. There’s no point in having a journal if someone is going to fill it out for you.”
Rapunzel flipped to the front, and paused. There was an inscription in a language she didn’t recognize. “Sois satisfaite!” Ariana read aloud. “It means, be satisfied.”
There’s more in you.
“As princess, you need to show your subjects that you are content.” Ariana said.
Rapunzel paused, slightly uncertain, a fracture stinging in the back of her mind. “What if I decide-”
“Rapunzel,” Ariana said, touching her cheek gently. “You don’t need to decide anything.” She smiled, and pulled Rapunzel in for a hug. She kissed her forehead, wished her goodnight, and left.
The fracture spread.
“Be content with where you are?” Rapunzel said quietly, and then turned to Pascal, who was lounging on a pillow. “Something’s not right, Pascal.”
He looked surprised by her assessment, and then waved her off with a squeak. Rapunzel flipped through the journal, the fractures growing larger, and more tangible. Images of an art style she knew was her own flashed between the pages, almost recognizable.
The fractures distorted the images, but they could not be ignored any longer.
“Raps!” Cassandra poked her head in. “Coronation time.”
That can’t be right-
“Cass…” Rapunzel said slowly. “Are you...happy here?”
“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” Cassandra asked, her smile big. “My best friend is getting crowned princess! What’s better than that?” Her hands, both of them, were whole and uninjured.
Blackened, shriveled flesh that Rapunzel could just barely see as Cassandra curled in on herself, struggling not to cry out, only snapping when Rapunzel made a move to help and that was because it was her fault, her fault, and her fault that Eileen nearly bled out once again in the wood crypt that was the Great Tree and couldn’t tell her about her until long after it had happened-
“Absolutely nothing.” Rapunzel said.
“Good,” Cassandra said. “Now what are we waiting for? Let’s get you coronated.”
*** *** ***
“Time’s almost up!” Tromus crowed, watching the vines creep upon Rapunzel even more. “I’d start getting nervous, if I were you.”
“Would you please shut up?!” Eileen gasped. “Rapunzel! Rapunzel, please!”
*** *** ***
“The wearer of this crown,” The little wizen priest said. “Is a shining example of the promise that is Corona.”
Rapunzel smiled, and he stepped forward to place the crown upon her head-
The jewel caught the reflection of the other Rapunzel, standing behind her with a frustrated look. “Once you put that crown on, you’ll accept this world, and you will be stuck here forever!”
Rapunzel stumbled back, and the fractures were now impossible to ignore. They cracked, showing her the full picture, as much as she wished not too. “This isn’t real.” She whispered.
Eileen nudged her. “Rapunzel, what are you doing? Just put the crown on, everything will be fine!”
“This isn’t real!” Rapunzel said, and it really did hurt to say that. “As much as I want it to be, it isn’t. And I’m not going to abandon my friends for a fantasy!”
Eileen opened her mouth to say something, but now the fractures began to tear the image apart, and the audience suddenly went still and strange. A French-y laugh echoed around the room, and green fog poured in, swirling at Rapunzel’s feet.
She stumbled back as the mist took shape into Matthews, only he was spectral and scowling. “I tried to do things the easy way,” He said. “You said no to the dream. So let’s see how you like being trapped inside your worst nightmare!”
Green fire suddenly exploded around her in a tight ring, and she yelped, feeling the heat licked at her dangerously, like a dog waiting to strike. The fractures grew larger, and the fire blinked in and out of existence. Rapunzel scrambled through an opening, making a break for the door.
“You don’t get it, do you, Princess?” Matthews cackled. “I control this world!” The fracture happened again, and Rapunzel tumbled to the ground, suddenly on the bridge leading out of Corona.
Faceless creatures in the vague shapes of people she knew scuttled out, and Rapunzel stepped back, feeling sick. “Uh, other me?!” She called out, slightly panicked. “I could really use your help right about now!”
The faceless things crept closer, and Rapunzel frowned. “Where am I when I need me?!”
There was a flash of blonde hair, and the other Rapunzel swung up from underneath the bridge, reminding Rapunzel comically of a troll. The other Rapunzel grinned. “Hi again!” She nodded at the creatures. “Need a little help wrapping these guys up?”
“If you wouldn’t mind.” Rapunzel said, a tad sheepish.
The other Rapunzel gathered her hair, looking pleased. “I love how polite we are!”
A creature skittered forward with a squeal, but the other Rapunzel sprung into action, swinging her hair around it and throwing it back. It slammed into the other beings, and they disappeared in another fracture. The other Rapunzel smiled. “Dream fighting is easy-” She stumbled, cut off by the bridge suddenly rumbling.
A green monster that might have once been Pascal rose up from under the bridge, eyes disjointed and lifeless. It hissed, and it rumbled the dreamscape like an earthquake, fixing one of its eyes on the other Rapunzel with spite. The other Rapunzel turned away, but the monster flicked out his tongue, swallowing her.
“Oh my God!” Rapunzel stumbled back. “Pascal!”
The monster gagged, and opened its mouth. The other Rapunzel pushed her way out, partially, looking only slightly irritated. “I’m not real, silly, remember?” The monster lurched, trying to swallow her again. “Now run!”
Rapunzel turned and sprinted, hearing a rather disgusting crunch from behind her. She heard Pascal rumbling after her, getting ever closer. “Come on, come on-” She glanced back, adn shrieked when she saw Pascal’s tongue shooting towards her. She didn’t dodge quick enough, and was soon off her feet, rocketing towards the endless abyss of monster Pascal’s mouth.
“Pascal, no-!” Rapunzel said, but suddenly she was upright, leaning against a wooden board. She tried to stand, but her arms were chained behind her. The room was dim, but when lightning flashed, Rapunzel could see where she was all too easily; back in her tower, trapped.
And Gothel was on the steps.
“Hello, Rapunzel.” Gothel said, coming down the steps leisurely. She either didn’t notice Rapunzel’s shriek and sudden panic or chose not to. “Oh, how I’ve missed you, my precious flower!”
“Get away from me!” Rapunzel said, but her voice was shrill.
Gothel chuckled, running her fingers through Rapunzel’s short brown hair. Rapunzel flinched as though struck. “When will you realize that I always get the better of you, whether you’re trapped in a tower, or trapped in your own mind.”
Gothel chuckled, and Rapunzel forced her spiraling thoughts to focus. My own mind, my own mind, my own mind-
“You’re right,” Rapunzel said. “This is my mind. I’m in control.”
She focused, imagining the chains disappearing into...into daisies. Chains to daisies, chains to daisies…
She felt the weight in her wrists disappear, replaced by a fragrant flower scent. Gothel was turning, looking irritated. “What are you-” She went down, having taken a frying pan to the forehead.
“Ha!” Rapunzel said, spinning the newly summoned pan in her hand. “That felt good!”
Gothel glared up at her, her eyes suddenly going a strange lime green. “I have had enough!” She melted away, and the room burst into green flames, Matthews floating above them. “You will not escape my control!”
“You have no power over me here!” She declared, and the fireball Matthews had held above his head turned into a cupcake, falling down and smearing him with icing.
“You thought by dangling an easy life in front of me, that I would follow you into oblivion,” Rapunzel said, her confidence growing. “Well, you were wrong!”
She concentrated, willing the fractures to bend to her will, and suddenly she was in front of the plaque to the Sunflower, the black rocks poking out along the edges. Matthews floated above it, looking startled. “You little-” He hissed, but yelped when Rapunzel stepped towards the rocks. The rocks began to glow blue.
“I’m a lot tougher than you think,” Rapunzel said. “And the only thing I’m following is my destiny.”
She reached out and touched the rock. Matthews wailed curses, but it was too late. His dream world fell apart, and Rapunzel opened her eyes.
*** *** ***
“Rapunzel!” Eileen said, not noticing the house starting to shake because Rapunzel’s up she’s okay oh my God-
The vines holding her and Lance fell away, and she fell roughly, barely having time to process what had happened before Rapunzel knocked her over in a tight hug.
“I hate to break up the reunion,” Lance said, looking startled with how badly the rubble was starting to fall. “But we need to leave, like, right now!”
“Follow me!” Rapunzel said, grabbing Eileen’s hand and dragging her out. A door materialized, as if admitting defeat, and Rapunzel practically ripped it off the hinges. The three tumbled outside, and sand poured out of the house, first from the door, and then from the windows.
A harsh breeze that smelled like saltwater picked up, and the house began to fall apart, turning to sand in the wind. Eileen shut her eyes against the sandstorm, aware only of Rapunzel, still hugging her tightly.
There was one more gust of wind that nearly knocked Eileen off her feet, and then the world was still. She hazarded a peek, but there was nothing left of the house other than a pile of sand. “Everybody okay?” Rapunzel asked.
Eileen opened her mouth to answer, and then spat out sand.
“Well well well!” Eileen turned, shocked to see Shorty leaning leisurely against Maximus and Fidella, looking contentedly clueless. “Look who finally decided to show up!” He said.
“Max! Fidella!” Rapunzel rushed up to the horses, hugging them. “Oh, it’s good to see you-” She paused, suddenly looking afraid. “Wait, where’s Cass?”
The sand shifted, and a door appeared out of it. Eileen tensed, ready for another fight with Trommus when the doorknob jiggled. But instead, without much ceremony, the door slammed open, and Cassandra tumbled out. Owl swooping out with a relieved hoot.
“Cass!” Rapunzel said, looking relieved. She rushed up, hugging Cassandra tightly, who for some reason had an expression as though she had tasted bile. “Oh, thank God! Are you okay?! Where were you?!”
“I’m fine,” Cassandra said, and her voice was clipped. “Let’s get moving, shall we?”
“I-” Rapunzel swallowed hard. “O-okay.” She stepped away, and Cassandra immediately marched off to the horses. Rapunzel hung back, waiting for Eileen to catch up with her before falling in step.
“You okay?” Eileen asked her. “I didn’t get the chance to ask you back there because, you know, we were about to be suffocated by sand.”
Rapunzel didn’t laugh at her joke, or even smile. Eileen frowned, nudging her. “Hello?”
“Hm?” Rapunzel said, startling ever so slightly at her touch.
“I asked if you were okay.” Eileen repeated.
“I…” Rapunzel looked thoughtful, and she opened her mouth, and then slowly closed it, as if deciding how to answer the question. After a moment, she smiled, looking bright once again. “Never better.” She declared.
“If...if you say so.” Eileen said.
“I do say so,” Rapunzel said, a bit too quickly. “Now come on.”
She focused on Cassandra’s far off form, grabbing the horses with an odd expression of emptiness on her face.
“Destiny awaits.” Rapunzel said, sounding far less enthusiastic than usual.
Notes:
look at all these useless gays
this chapter title is fun because like "the 'l' word" it's got a double meaning. lesbian-a word that Eileen's avoided due to her own issues-and love, because she's very much in love with rapunzel. she's avoiding love and avoiding lesbian at the same time. i was pretty proud of it
this one is girlfriends and gay ehehehehehe
Chapter 12: Vigor's Labyrinth
Notes:
oh god the two parter is up next.
should i do like, an in-between thing instead of starting the next book right away? like on the fifteenth instead of starting book three do we want a oneshot of something? i feel like thats appropriate consider we have a Big Event TM coming up. what would we want a oneshot of?
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“Just one more day and we’ll be at the Dark Kingdom!” Rapunzel declared happily. “Hope we packed our torches!”
Silence from the group. Owl tilted his head.
“Because...it’s the Dark Kingdom.” Rapunzel explained weakly. She coughed, turning to Eileen, who was busy staring at the scroll pieces with such intensity that it almost seemed like something dramatic was about to happen with them.
“You okay, Eileen?” Rapunzel asked. “You seem distracted.”
“‘M fine,” She said automatically, and then noticed Rapunzel’s look. “I...you know, it’s like when you have a deadline for something, and it feels like a million years away so you don’t have to do anything about it, and then a million years pass, and suddenly you’re there?”
“When have you ever experienced a deadline?” Cassandra snorted.
Eileen glared at her. “I mean, the creepy guy with the yellow eyes said we were doomed if we went there. And we still have literally no idea what we’re walking into. And the only clue we have is in a different language and still has pieces missing.” She gestured to the scroll pieces.
Rapunzel put her hand on her shoulder. “I know it’s scary, but we can’t turn back now.”
We could, but I know you won’t hear of it.
“Besides…” Rapunzel smiled like she knew a secret. “You and I have other plans.”
Eileen blinked. “Er...we do?”
Rapunzel coughed. “Birthday plans?”
“I-” Eileen’s eyes widened. “Shit, wait, is it your birthday?! Christ, I’m sorry, we don’t really have calendars-” She paused, noticing Rapunzel’s badly concealed grin. “It’s...not your birthday?”
“Ha! Got you!” Rapunzel laughed. “Oh, you should have seen your face! Pascal, do her face!”
The lizard on her shoulder obliged, pulling a face of absolute horror, and then collapsed into reptilian giggles.
“Alright, good prank.” Eileen said, turning back to the scroll.
“What-no, it is someone’s birthday! Just not mine.” Rapunzel said.
“Really?” Eileen asked, glancing up at her. “Who?”
*** *** ***
“Happy birthday!” Rapunzel announced after she had dragged Eileen out into a different field. She dropped something shaped like a cupcake into her hands, made out of mushrooms, nuts, and berries. A tiny candle sputtered on top of it, flickering with each breeze.
“Er,” Eileen said. “I don’t think it’s my birthday. I mean, there’s a one in three hundred and sixty five chance you’re right, but…”
“I know we don’t know when you were born, but everybody has a birthday. So I figured, why not today?” She grinned, sunny and ecstatic. “Make a wish! But don’t eat the cupcake. I don’t know if the mushrooms are poisonous or not.”
“Gotcha. No eating.” Eileen said, trying to sound casually grateful, but her heart swelled and twisted at the gesture anyway. She glanced down at the sad candle. “I don’t really believe in the whole wish making thing...Pascal, you probably shouldn’t eat the mushrooms either.” She scolded the lizard, and Pascal made a face. A slightly stronger breeze blew, and the candle went out.
“Okay, okay, you don’t have to make a wish.” Rapunzel said.
Eileen raised an eyebrow. “Really? Usually you’d get on me for being a killjoy or whatever.”
“Well, it’s your day!” Rapunzel said. “We can do what you want.”
Eileen paused, thinking. “I guess we can just...make it our day? And try not to think about our possible impending doom or whatever, right?”
Rapunzel grinned, and Eileen felt just a little bit of the tension leave her body. “And I’m not going to let anything ruin it.” She declared.
As soon as the words left her mouth, she realized she shouldn’t have said that. There was the sound of an odd animal bleat, and Eileen glanced over to see a caravan coming towards them, a familiar monkey-owning woman driving it.
Madame Canardist shook her fist at the pair. “Out of the way!”
“Oh God.” Eileen said.
She turned to Rapunzel, indignant. “They’re following us!”
“I’m sure they’re not.” Rapunzel said.
*** *** ***
“We have been following you.” Madame Canardist said.
Rapunzel looked sheepish.
“Vigor wants to give you an important fortune,” Canardist said, motioning to her monkey. “He seems to have grown attached to you. Ha! There is no accounting for his taste.”
The monkey blinked slowly, looking like he had no opinion on the matter one way or the other.
“Well, I like him too.” Rapunzel said.
“You like everyone, Blondie.” Eileen said, exasperated. She turned to Canardist with a glare. “Let me guess, the price of this highly important and not a scam fortune is five silver pieces.”
Canardist gasped at the offense. “The prediction is free, of course! Now,” She pushed Vigor forward to the crystal ball gently. “Quiet down, and let Vigor summon the spirits from beyond.”
Vigor went still, staring into the ball. The caravan shuddered, and Pascal squeaked in alarm. The crystal ball glowed a bright green and began to levitate. Eileen poked it curiously, but jumped back as Vigor started shrieking, jumping around the table.
Just as quickly as it started, it was over, and Vigor went still. The crystal ball dropped back onto the table, once again glassy and normal. Vigor reached into his turban, withdrawing a slip of paper and handing it to Canardist. She unfolded it grandly.
“‘For you’,” Canardist said in a spooky voice. “‘The path awaits, where the final quarter lies, after many dire straits’.”
“Final quarter...oh!” Rapunzel turned to Eileen. “He’s gotta be talking about the fourth scroll piece!”
“The mental hoops you must’ve had to jump through to get there-” Eileen began, and then sighed. “It’s a monkey, Rapunzel!”
“We need that fourth piece of the scroll to make sense of the others,” She stood up, edging around the tiny caravan. “And besides, doesn’t this sound like it’s gonna be a birthday to remember?”
“Just because I remember it doesn’t mean it’s good.” Eileen said. Then she caught sight of Rapunzel’s expression and sighed. “Fine. Where is this path thingie?”
“Vigor will guide you,” Canardist said. “For five silver pieces.”
“And there it is.” Eileen muttered.
*** *** ***
“If I end up with another broken bone, I’m gonna be pissed.” Eileen said, following the stupid money through the fog.
“We just won’t fall off a cliff this time.” Rapunzel said.
“We fall off cliffs literally all the time,” Eileen said. “Have you noticed that? Frankly, I’m surprised we haven’t had worse injuries.”
Vigor suddenly stopped, scuttling on top of something that looked suspiciously like a headstone. “What’d you find?” Rapunzel asked the monkey. Vigor started chewing the stone.
Eileen brushed some vines away from the stone, and frowned. It wasn’t a headstone, at least, but she didn’t know what it was. “‘The Path of Demanitus’.” She read the inscription on the stone aloud.
“Demanitus was that engineer-inventor guy who built the thing that stopped the blizzard from destroying Corona.” Rapunzel said thoughtfully. The fog cleared slightly, and a massive stone archway, covered in moss, was just visible in front of them.
“Hm, that’s not ominous.” Eileen said.
Vigor leapt off the stone with a screech, sprinting inside the arch. “Oh Christ-Vigor?” Eileen said, not wanting to pay Canardist reparation fees if they lost her monkey. Rapunzel grabbed her hand, squeezing, and Eileen knew it was because she didn’t want to get lost in the fog and separated, but she felt her face grow hot anyway. Lucky for the fog, she supposed.
She ducked under vines and froze at the scene before her.
The fog had cleared, and as far as Eileen could see, there was a massive stone labyrinth with twisting black rocks on top of the walls. She squinted, but couldn’t see the end of the twisting mass of stone.
“Wow!” Rapunzel smiled. “I’ve always wanted to go through a giant maze!”
“I-” Eileen shook her head. “That’s great, but...this is also super inconvenient for us? Woulda been nice if Mr. Genius Inventor Demanitus left us a map or something.”
“You require no map.” A deep male voice said.
Eileen whirled around, her knife out in an instant. Vigor was looking at them, not with his usual blank stare, but with purpose and some kind of strange determination. He hopped down from his perch, standing up straight.
“For I,” He said. “Am Lord Demanitus.”
There was a beat of silence.
“WHAT THE FUCK?!” Eileen said shrilly. The monkey frowned.
“Okay, how-” Eileen gritted her teeth. “How is Canardist doing this? What kind of weird scheme is this?”
“There is no subterfuge, I assure you,” The monkey said. “I am Lord Demanitus, protector of ancient Corona, devotee of science and invention, who has emerged from this monkey in your time of need-banana!” He scurried over to a tiny banana tree, plucking a banana off with a pleased hoot.
Eileen took a step back. “What the fuck.” She croaked.
“Yeah,” Rapunzel said, for once looking just as thrown. “What the fuck is right.”
“Listen, and listen well,” Demanitus said, wiping his mouth. “Millenia ago, a mysterious event in the heavens divided an ancient power in two. The Sundrop and Moonstone fell to the Earth. Three of my pupils and I researched the legend of the Sundrop and Moonstone, two elements that longed to reunite.”
Demanitus was pacing now, lost in memory. “We searched, but alas, we could not find them. And unfortunately, we were not the only ones looking. My pupils betrayed me and summoned my old nemesis, Zhan Tiri, a warlock from another realm bent on destruction. It took all my powers to banish the evil from our world. I knew the research I had written about the Sundrop and Moonstone was valuable. Dangerous, even, in the wrong hands. So I tore the scroll and hid the pieces.”
“Why not just destroy it?” Eileen said, but Rapunzel elbowed her.
Demanitus didn’t seem to hear her. “I placed the final piece within this maze, which I created to keep away the unworthy.”
“Okay, and you’re a monkey because…?” Eileen said, still unsure if she was dreaming or not.
“I could not let Zhan Tiri find me!” Demanitus said, as if this were obvious. “Using my scientific acumen coupled with an ancient spell, I was able to create a hiding place, a living, simian creature, which I would lay dormant inside until such a time as I could emerge again.”
“That’s…” Eileen paused. “Convoluted.”
“Why didn’t you come out before?” Rapunzel asked.
“I’m no sorcerer,” The monkey said. “But from what I understand of the spell, it would allow me to emerge from this form only once. And only for a few hours. After which, my spirit shall retreat into this monkey forever. Now,” He grabbed one more banana. “Come along! Not a moment to waste!” He scampered off into the maze.
Eileen sighed. “Oh my God.”
“Wow,” Rapunzel said. “If this guy really is Demanitus, this is kind of a huge honor!”
“He’s a monkey!” Eileen said. “And also, how do we know he’s not another one of Zhan Tiri’s cronies? I’m getting sick of running into those guys.”
“I know, I know…” Rapunzel said. “I’ll be...cautiously optimistic.” She started into the maze after Demanitus.
“What’s the difference between normal optimism and cautious optimism?” Eileen teased, following her.
“I just told you, one’s cautious, the other isn’t. Don’t lag, come on!”
*** *** ***
“Dead end!” Rapunzel said, scribbling something down on a blank page of her journal that she was turning into a map of the maze. “This is so much fun!”
“Whatever you say.” Eileen said.
“Okay, so that was a right turn, so…” Rapunzel muttered to herself.
“Christ.” Eileen said, backing away from a skeleton that still somehow had a bloodshot eyeball in the eye socket. She paused when they came to another dead end, although this time there was a stone pillar with a message inscribed on it.
“‘A room with no way in, and no way out’,” Rapunzel read. “‘See it in the rain, but never in a drought’. A riddle! Oh, no one tell me the answer, I got this.”
“You saw the skeleton, right?” Eileen said. “What the hell are riddles gonna do for us?”
“Riddles shall help you get through this maze,” Demanitus said. “And also faith.”
“You’re a monkey.” Eileen said.
Demanitus sighed. “You must not believe in only what you see.”
“Look, buddy,” Eileen sighed. “When you grow up like I did, you learn real quick that the difference between believing only what you see and ‘having faith things will work out’ is the difference between getting stabbed in the back-literally-or getting out alive.”
Demanitus waved a stick at her, and she sighed. “No, I don’t want your dumb stick-” Something pale and long-legged scuttled on her shoulder, and she yelped. “Give me the stick!”
She grabbed it, flicking a fat, white spider off her shoulder. It landed in the skeleton’s eye socket, and Eileen saw the design on its abdomen eerily imitated a bloodshot eye. It scuttled out, was followed by dozens more of the same spider.
“Ivory spiders!” Rapunzel said, noticing them with a look of horror. “They’re venomous!”
“Of course they are!” Eileen said, backing away from the arachnids. Good thing Lance wasn’t here, she supposed.
“Demanitus, now would be a good time to tell us the answer to the riddle.” Eileen said.
“I don’t remember it!” He said. “I built this a thousand years ago and was buried deep within the consciousness of a monkey! What do you expect?!”
“I expected better! Silly me!” She stomped frantically on the spiders, her stomach turning slightly when they made loud squelching sounds when crushed. But more just kept coming.
“I got it!” Rapunzel said. “A room with no way in-a mushroom!”
“There!” Eileen spotted a bright red and whited spotted toadstool, and made a break for it, swatting and stomping on spiders. She grabbed it, and yanked it, and then yanked again, surprised by the resistance. She pulled up what looked like to be some kind of stone lever, and pushed it.
The stone pillar rumbled and moved aside to open up a dark hallway. It didn’t look particularly inviting, but frankly, it was better than the spiders. “This way!” Eileen waved to Rapunzel, who managed to snatch up Pascal and run through the door without being bitten.
The door slammed shut, and Eileen stomped on a spider that managed to get through. “Ugh. Spider guts.”
“I told you faith would get us through.” Demanitus said.
“It did not.” Eileen said dully.
*** *** ***
The next stop was a shallow, scummy fountain with a fat stone gargoyle sitting at the top, staring down at them with a grouchy scowl. “Yay, more riddles.” Eileen said.
“‘If thou wish to skirt a deadly stress, donate a coin, earn a safe egress.’” Rapunzel read. She shrugged, grabbing a coin from her bag and tossing it in.
Demanitus coughed. “I believe I misplaced my wallet.”
“Of course.” Eileen said.
“I’ll spot you.” Rapunzel said, offering Demanitus a coin. He smiled, and tossed it in.
They all looked to Eileen. She groaned. “I literally have one coin left, what with all the money we’ve burnt through already on blackmailing teenagers, repairs, and fortune tellers.”
“Think of it as a birthday wish.” Rapunzel said.
“Call me a cynic,” Eileen said. “But I’ll pass.”
Rapunzel nudged her. Eileen sighed. “Fine, I’ll put the damn coin in.” She tossed it in the air.
Rapunzel smiled, but when she turned away, Eileen snatched it at the last moment. We’ve wasted enough, this is getting ridiculous.
She followed Rapunzel and the monkey, not seeing the gargoyle twitch, it’s eyes lighting up red.
*** *** ***
They continued on, and though Eileen would never admit it while she was in her current mood, she had to admit: Rapunzel was really good at riddles.
They came to a pause in front of a massive chasm, the pit filled with a green bubbling liquid that smelled like rotten eggs. A bridge made of thin green crystal stretched across to a tiny rock island in the middle, holding a tiny see through green box that had a scrap of paper inside.
“Holy shit,” Eileen said. “It’s...actually here!”
Demanitus looked at her sideways. “You doubted me.”
“You’re a monkey.” She said.
He shook his head. “I wish you would stop using that as your go-to reasoning,” He chittered oddly, and then shook his head. “We better hurry.”
Eileen looked at the wooden sign. “‘Before thou claim thy glory, have faith the crystal bridge shall lead your to your quarry’-okay, I’m not reading all this, this is dumb.”
“Hmph.” Demanitus said, grabbing the golden key hanging on a loose nail and tossing it. It soared over the side of the ledge, plopping into the sulfurous mix below.
“Why the fuck did you do that?!” Eileen asked shrilly.
“I thought you were going to catch it!” Demanitus said, looking equally alarmed.
“You can’t just throw it! You gotta warn me!”
“I assumed you had faster reflexes.”
“Eileen, you can just pick the lock.” Rapunzel said.
“Alright, yeah…” Eileen took a breath. “Do you have a-of course you do.” She smiled when Rapunzel pressed a bobby pin into her hand.
She paused, gently poking the crystal bridge with her foot. It cracked slightly, and a few shards fell off into the pit below, and the liquid hissed, releasing more sulfur. Eileen gagged. “Yeah, no.”
Demanitus coughed. “Faith, Eileen. Remember the sign.”
“Faith has very little credence over gravity.” Eileen said.
“Eileen…” Rapunzel said. “These riddles have helped so far-here, let me do it-” She stepped forward, but Eileen shook her head.
“No no! I got it!” She took a shaky breath, refusing to risk Rapunzel falling into the sulfur. “Faith, okay, no problem…” She stepped out onto the bridge, and she heard tiny cracks, but it didn’t give.
Slowly, ever so slowly, she made her way across, the smell of rotten eggs making her slightly dizzy. The thought of simply tipping over and falling gave her purpose to keep moving. That would be such an embarrassing way to die. Cassandra would laugh at her funeral for sure.
She made it to the box, sticking the bobby pin in the tiny keyhole and wriggling it around, trying to find the weak spot. She heard a click as the lock bent to her will, and smiled widely, flipping open the box and withdrawing the scroll piece.
She didn’t get a chance to look at it before the bridge rumbled, and instead of tiny hairline fractures, a big crack ran down the middle of the bridge. “Eileen! Run!” Rapunzel shouted, looking panicked.
Eileen didn’t need to be told twice. She took off, sprinting across the bridge, but only made it halfway before it tilted, and she stumbled with a startled cry. She saw Rapunzel undoing her hair, and threw herself forward, just managing to grab a thick lock. She fell, and squeezed her eyes shut, hoping there wasn’t too much slack-
Something stung her feet slightly, and she looked down to see herself less than an inch from the sulfurous liquid, bubbling flecks of green liquid spitting out and landing on her shoes with a hiss. “Pull me up! Pull me up!”
Rapunzel obliged, and they made it out just before the rest of the bridge collapsed. “Why…” Eileen glared at Demanitus. “Why would you make the bridge out of crystal?!”
“The scroll!” Rapunzel said, and Eileen handed it to her. She unfurled it, and it showed some kind of intricate design that Eileen couldn’t even begin to decipher. It was mostly writing.
Rapunzel set all four pieces down next to each other, and gasped when the torn edges suddenly lit up blue, and the scroll knit itself back together.
“Huh…” Eileen said. “That’s...pretty insane, I have to admit-” Something rumbled, like big footsteps coming closer. She groaned. “Oh Christ, now what?!”
Demanitus glared at her. “What did you do?!”
“Why do you assume it was me?!” Eileen asked.
He simply looked at her, and the rumbling got close.
“Damn, no one has any faith in me.” She sighed, but pulled out the coin she still had, managing to look guilty.
“The coin!” Demanitus gasped. “You were supposed to put it in the fountain!”
“Okay, I didn’t!” Eileen snapped. “So what?!”
The ‘so what’ stomped around the corner, eyes alight with crimson malice. The stone gargoyle hissed, showing off granite fangs. Eileen gulped. “Whoops.”
It charged with a roar that sounded like rocks banging together, and the group took off. “Turn it off!” Eileen said.
“I can’t!” Demanitus said. “I didn’t construct it with vulnerabilities! I thought people would be smart enough to put a coin in!” He glared pointedly at Eileen.
The gargoyle lunged, and Eileen threw herself out of the way before scrambling to her feet and continuing to run. “Oh, I’m not smart?!” She snapped at Demanitus. “Who builds shit like that thing and doesn’t install an off switch?! Huh?! Why not?!”
The gargoyle leapt over them, and Eileen stumbled back. The gargoyle raised it’s stone hands to smash them into little pieces, but Eileen felt something wrap around herself; Rapunzel’s hair, yanking them out of the way just in time before the gargoyle’s fists hit the ground, cracking the floor.
“Can we focus on dodging, and then argue?” Rapunzel said.
The gargoyle charged, and they took off once again, the monster trying to grab at Rapunzel’s still loose hair, roaring in its awful rocky voice all the wild. There was wild screeching, and Eileen glanced back to see Demanitus jumping up and down, waving his arms to attract the gargoyle’s attention. It worked, and the gargoyle turned, chasing the monkey through the maze while Eileen and Rapunzel went the opposite direction.
“There!” Eileen pointed to a new doorway, and then two ducked in. Demanitus scrambled in after them, thankfully more agile than the rock monster, and Eileen grabbed the chain pulley by the wall, yanking it down over the door, sealing them off from the gargoyle.
“Phew.” Eileen said, and as soon as the words left her mouth, she heard something slam on the door and roar. She stumbled back. The room rumbled, and pebbles and dust rained down from the stone ceiling.
Demanitus chittered, and then shook his head. “I’m running out of time,” He sighed. “Listen, one must unite the Sundrop and Moonstone to summon the ultimate power. The fourth piece of the scroll contains the instructions to wield that power.”
“Wield the power?” Rapunzel looked unsure.
“In the right hands it can be used for good,” Demanitus said. “But in the wrong, it could be inconceivably deadly! Now you know why I tested your faith: to be sure the purest of hearts controls the power!”
Pascal squeaked in agreement, though Rapunzel still looked unsure. Eileen agreed with her silent assessment. This ‘ultimate power’ business was suspicious to say the least.
“Why don’t we just leave the Moonstone alone? Let sleeping dogs lie, as they say.” Eileen said.
“If the Sundrop does not join with the Moonstone, the black rocks will reawaken and seek you out forever. They will destroy everything in your path!” Demanitus said.
“Okay, that’s a compelling reason,” Eileen admitted, though she felt no less at ease. “So anyway, how the hell do we get out of your deathtrap maze?!”
The room rumbled again, and a crack formed in the door. The gargoyle peered through, snarling. Demanitus grabbed Rapunzel’s arm, looking frantic. “The moon cannot be seen without the sun’s light,” He said quickly. “She gives you light. You must return the favor with your faith.”
Eileen hoped her face wasn’t red. “I think you’re overestimating the relationship here,” She said, and didn’t notice Rapunzel’s slight frown. “And frankly, I really don’t think I have this faith.”
“It’s not that you need to have faith,” Demanitus said. “You need to find the faith you already have! Think…”
Eileen sighed, and then glanced at Rapunzel. “I…” She coughed. “Not to sound all sappy-”
“Eileen.” Rapunzel said.
“Yeah, yeah, okay...I have faith in you, anyway. And...that’s gotta count for something, right?” She smiled, a bit embarrassed by her unorthodox display of emotions, but Rapunzel smiled back brilliantly and Eileen’s heart did a little flip-
Demanitus chittered, and shook her head, and Rapunzel looked startled. “Wait, Demanitus, don’t go, I have so many questions!” She looked almost frantic. “How does my hair work? What does the Moonstone do?”
“Questions you must answer yourself,” Demanitus said, and for what it was worth, he did seem genuinely sorry about it. “I waited a millenia in this monkey to meet the Sundrop. I have faith in you.”
Rapunzel opened her mouth to say something, but suddenly the monkey screeched, and his eyes went blank. He scurried to Eileen, climbing her and coming to rest on her head. Eileen frowned. “Yuck.”
The room rumbled again, and larger pebbles bordering on the dangerous size came down from the ceiling. The door fell, and the gargoyle stomped in, growling loudly. Eileen stiffened. “Blondie, you’re gonna save us.”
“How?!” Rapunzel asked.
“I don’t...know,” Eileen admitted, and she realized this probably came across with less weight than she wanted because of the monkey on her head. “But I have faith in you. Always have.”
Rapunzel smiled again, and the gargoyle roared, starting to lumber forward. Rapunzel stepped forward, and grabbed Eileen’s hand. Eileen squeezed back gently, and Rapunzel closed her eyes, her expression becoming one of intense concentration.
Her hair suddenly began to glow, snaking around like a living creature, chasing away the shadows of the dark labyrinth. The gargoyle reached them, and raised its arms, but the hair suddenly whipped around them in a protective glowing ball. Eileen felt the impact of the blow from the gargoyle, but they were unharmed.
There was the sound of a massive explosion, and Rapunzel’s hair lost its glow and fell away. The maze was gone-shattered and demolished, a clear path carved out for them to exit. Rapunzel looked startled, and then glanced at Eileen. “I…”
“Damn.” Eileen said quietly.
“That was a-maze-ing.” Rapunzel said, and then grinned widely, looking at Eileen for her reaction.
Eileen scowled, dropping her hand. “That’s it, I’m leaving you here. We’re not friends anymore.”
Rapunzel laughed, her hair managing to catch the sun just right so it looked like it was glowing again.
*** *** ***
Eileen pried the monkey off her head, dropping him at Madame Canaradist’s feet. “See ya, Vigor,” She said. “It’s been...interesting.”
Vigor scratched his armpit.
“Oh!” Madame Canardist said, reaching forward and carefully plucking the tiny red gem off of Vigor’s turban. “He wanted you to have this.” She held the gem out to Eileen.
“Me?” Eileen asked. “It’s just glass.” She took it anyway, though, slipping it into her pocket.
Madame Canardist ushered the monkey inside the caravan, and the door slammed shut. “Hm,” Eileen said, turning to Rapunzel. “Blondie, I gotta say, this is the weirdest birthday I’ve ever had, and also the best.”
Rapunzel laughed, elbowing Eileen gently as they began to make their way back to their own camp. “Since it’s your first, wouldn’t that also make it the worst?”
“Hey, I’m supposed to be the cynical one, not you,” Eileen said. “And besides, I consider it the best.”
“Really?” Rapunzel asked, looking a bit surprised. “We almost died.”
“We’re usually about to die,” Eileen shrugged. “And besides, I got to spend the day with you-and Pascal,” She added, seeing the lizard look at her sideways on Rapunzel’s shoulder. “So that’s pretty great.”
Rapunzel smiled. “Come on. The others are probably getting worried.”
“Next stop, the Dark Kingdom.” Eileen said.
*** *** ***
It was a surprisingly warm night, but they made a fire anyway. Eileen stood a ways away, silently observing Rapunzel retell the day to a fascinated looking Lance and Cassandra, grinning as she told the story in a rather grand fashion, adopting a rather funny voice for Demanitus.
Eileen smiled, wondering how it was possible to be so deeply in love with someone.
She felt the glass gem in her pocket, and took it out, examining it. Her finger hit a little groove in the center, and she frowned slightly, picking at it. The gem popped open, the inside hollow and containing a tiny piece of folded paper.
She opened it up, and her blood ran cold.
“Eileen, are you hungry?” Lance called over.
“Yeah, sure,” Eileen said, pleased with how relaxed her voice sounded. “I haven't eaten anything since this morning. Rapunzel’s cupcake, lovely as it was, isn’t fit for consumption.”
Lance chuckled, and Rapunzel smiled, and went back to her story as Lance passed her a plate of fish they had caught earlier that day. Eileen listened to Rapunzel, occasionally interrupting to add her own thoughts or opinion on something.
When the fire died, and they settled for the night, Eileen forced herself to look at the paper again, silently begging she had misread it, because if it was true, it meant all her fears since the Great Tree were not her own paranoia, but in fact a gut feeling she had been ignoring.
But she had not misread it.
At the end of Rapunzel’s journey, one of her party shall turn against her.
Notes:
*brave as a noun by ajj begins to play again, closer*
Chapter 13: Icarus to Your Certainty (Part One)
Notes:
lucky for you guys, im working all day tomorrow, so here's a chapter a day early! the finale will be out on friday
enjoyyyyyy~
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“Damn if the place doesn’t live up to its name.” Eileen said as the horses peaked over the crest of a hill.
Dark clouds covered the valley, and black rocks sprouted all around, as incountable as ants. A thin, towering castle peeked through the gloom in the distance, and most of Eileen’s instincts told her to turn back.
She kept the prediction of betrayal on her person, and had neglected to tell Rapunzel about it. She felt guilty about it, but she didn’t want to worry the princess until she could determine whether the prediction had any truth.
But all the while, she kept noticing Cassandra’s sudden distance from the group at large.
She wouldn’t, it’s not possible. She’s a bitch, sure, but not...not a traitor. She loves Rapunzel too, and wouldn’t do anything to hurt her. Right?
“We made it.” Rapunzel said, climbing out of the caravan as Eileen pulled it to a stop. She stared at the castle, awed. “The Dark Kingdom.”
“Hm,” Eileen said. “So how do we get the caravan down there?”
There was a rumbling, and the horses suddenly whinnied as their harnesses snapped and the caravan began to slide backwards down the hill. “Wait-” Rapunzel said, starting to chase it, the others close behind.
It was no use. The caravan rolled over into a ditch, and toppled down like a wounded animal, black rocks piercing it and tearing it into little pieces. “Not again!” Eileen said.
“We’re gonna need a lot more glue this time.” Lance said.
“My clean clothes!” Shorty wailed.
“You don’t have clean clothes.” Cassandra said.
“Oh,” Shorty smiled easily. “Right.”
Rapunzel frowned, turning back to face the Dark Kingdom. Cassandra put a hand on her shoulder. “Your destiny awaits, princess.” She said softly.
“Ready for this?” Eileen asked.
“I just wish I knew what this was.” Rapunzel said. She sighed deeply. “I mean, Demanitus said if I didn’t grab the Moonstone, the rocks will destroy everything. But I have no idea what to expect.”
“I don’t know,” Cassandra said. “But whatever happens, you won’t have to face it alone.”
Eileen nodded, the paper fortune feeling like it weighed a million pounds.
*** *** ***
“I don’t wanna believe it either, Max,” Eileen said, unsure why she was confiding in the horse. “But Demanitus has been right about everything so far.”
Maximus nickered, glancing back at the group a little ways away, busying scavenging what they could from the ruined caravan. Eileen wasn’t good with animals like Rapunzel, but she got the message well enough. “No, I’m not gonna tell her,” She said. “And I’m not gonna argue with you about it.”
Maximus snorted, and Eileen huffed. “This is the last time I ask a horse for advice about an ancient monkey scientist warning.” She sighed, reaching up and grabbing a somewhat shriveled apple from a low hanging branch of a tree and offering it to Maximus. He didn’t seem to mind, biting it gratefully.
“Let’s just keep this whole thing to ourselves.” Eileen said, and then a pink tongue shot out and grabbed the fortune.
Pascal squeaked, handing it to Rapunzel. “What’s this?” She asked, unfolding it. Her eyes darted over it, and she frowned.
Maximus snorted and nudged her roughly, looking amused. “Shit.” Eileen said.
“Where’s this from?” Rapunzel asked.
“The monkey. It was in the glass gem,” Eileen sighed deeply. “Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t want-”
“It’s fine!” Rapunzel said, shaking her head. “No one’s gonna turn against me.” She started walking, and the group took that as their cue, making their way to the Dark Kingdom.
Eileen rushed up next to Rapunzel. “Look, I don’t want to believe it either, but it’s something we should keep in mind, right?”
“Everyone’s had my back so far,” Rapunzel said. “They’re not gonna stop now.”
“Unless they think they’re protecting you,” Eileen said. “That’s how Cass hurt her hand, after all.”
Rapunzel frowned. “You don’t think Cass…?”
“No!” Eileen said immediately, but her gut said yes, you dummy, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you!
“Look, I love Cass, she’s become like a sister to me, if sisters kind of hated each other but from what I hear that’s what most sibling relationships are like anyway…” She shook her head, glancing back at Cassandra, who was busy showing up Lance in his little string game. “But maybe we should just keep an eye on her, just to be safe-OW!”
A cross-eyed raven ran right into Eileen, and she fell back with a yelp. The raven fell to the ground and lay there for a moment, breathing fast. Rapunzel looked startled. “Are you alright?!”
“Yeah, yeah, just spooked me. What the hell…?” Eileen carefully nudged the raven with her foot, and that seemed to take it out of its shock. It scrambled to its feet, hopping around lopsidedly and cawing in a hoarse voice. Even hoarse for a raven.
“What is he doing?” Eileen asked, watching the raven walk in circles.
Cassandra glanced up, and her eyes widened. “Maybe you should try asking its friends.”
The sky darkened, and suddenly the forest was filled with the sound of screeching ravens as they descended upon the group, dark eyes emotionless and beady. Eileen shrieked, swatting them away frantically. But for every one she scared off, two more took its place.
“They’re all following that one!” Rapunzel shouted, pointing to one raven that seemed a bit larger than the rest, with a spark of cold calculation in its eye. She ducked alongside Eileen when they swooped down, and when they climbed upwards to prepare for another dive-bomb, Eileen saw Pascal had accidentally become seated on the lead raven.
“Pascal, lead them this way!” Rapunzel shouted, and the lizard nodded.
Rapunzel scrambled up a tree, and Pascal managed to turn the raven around towards her. The rest of the birds moved in unison as Rapunzel spread her hair, catching the ravens like a net. There was frantic cawing and flapping from inside her hair for a moment before she yanked her hair back to release them in a flurry of feathers and shrieks, climbing up and away into the sky.
Pascal squeaked, looking dizzy. “It’s gonna take forever to get those feathers out of your hair.” Eileen said.
“Awesome, even the birds are hostile!” Lance said sarcastically.
“It’s gonna take a lot more than birds to stop us!” Rapunzel declared. She marched forward, and paused. “Something like this, for example.” She said, looking down into a massive pit with black rocks arching out of the bottom, just waiting for them to slip up so they could impale them.
“That’s a long way down.” Lance said, and his voice echoed.
“Help!” Shorty shouted down to the pit, and then his eyes widened when his cry echoed back. “Did you hear that?! Someone needs help!” He jumped, and Lance grabbed him with an irritated sigh.
“Any ideas how to cross that?” Eileen asked.
Rapunzel paused, looking around, and then grinned, pointing to a small building looming in the fog. “There!” She rushed forward.
It was some kind of crumbling watchtower with a wire stretching out from the top. A several yards out, dangling ominously over the pit, was a kind of cable car, swinging slightly and creaking loudly. “Come on, who’s afraid of a little old cable car?” Rapunzel asked brightly.
“Um-” Eileen coughed. “Besides my feelings on high up things that swing too much, that thing is a good fifty yards out there.”
“I can get it.” Cassandra said. She stepped forward, looking at the cable car critically. “I can go out, and wheel it back for the rest of you.”
Eileen and Rapunzel glanced at each other, each thinking of the slip of paper that Rapunzel now had. “I don’t know…” Rapunzel said.
“Trust me,” Cassandra said, mistaking their hesitancy for worry over her wellbeing as opposed to her loyalty. “I can do it.”
“Of course I trust you, we trust you,” Rapunzel said, nudging Eileen. “But your hand.”
“Even with my hand, I’m still the most agile out of us.” Cassandra said.
Eileen wanted to argue on principle, but frankly, Cassandra was probably right. And maybe it was cowardly, but she also really didn’t want to be the one to go out and get the cable car.
Rapunzel was quiet, and Cassandra took her silence as a blessing, climbing up the crumbling watchtower and placing her foot onto the wire, testing its strength. It held, for now at least.
She stepped out, her cape billowing in the wind. “She probably should’ve taken the armor off before going out onto the wire.” Eileen said.
“Maybe she’s making a fashion statement.” Lance said.
“Honey,” Shorty said, his voice slurring. “Armor is so last fall.”
Eileen opened her mouth to ask what Shorty knew about the previous autumnal fashion trends, but Cassandra suddenly jerked, falling, and the comment turned into a startled yelp.
She caught herself, only just, and scooting along the wire with her legs wrapped around it, dropping onto the cable car and out of sight. Eileen let out a shaky sigh of relief.
But then the cable car creaked, and began to move away from them. Eileen stepped forward, panic running through her because the damn fortune was right and Cassandra was going to leave them stranded here-
And then the cable car creaked, stopped, and began to move back towards them.
Eileen let out another shaky breath, and turned to Rapunzel, who seemed to be just as relieved.
The cable car came to a stop, and Cassandra came out. “See? Told you.”
*** *** ***
“You probably shouldn’t be looking over the edge.” Rapunzel whispered to Eileen.
“Can’t help it,” Eileen said through gritted teeth, staring down at the chasm. “I wanted to see how much longer we had to go, and then boom, I see our imminent death.”
Rapunzel smiled. “You’re fine. We’re almost there, and Cass didn’t let us down.”
“Okay, okay,” Eileen said, glad for the distraction. “I might have read too much into the monkey’s warning. It’s just…” She sighed. “I don’t want you to get hurt-”
Something thudded on the rooftop, and Eileen stumbled away from the window. “Ah, great, what-” She opened the hatch and froze.
There was someone massive on the roof, their face obscured by a skinned bear’s head. They raised an axe, preparing to bring it down-
“Shit!” Eileen slammed the hatch shut and stumbled away just before the axe could split her head in half. The cable car swayed, and she felt nauseous. “Why does shit like this keep happening?!”
“Lance, Cass, keep cranking!” Rapunzel said, and the two continued yanking on the crank, and the cable car sped up a bit. “Eileen, let’s see what our new friend wants.”
“Yay, more high up battles.” Eileen said, but drew her knife. Rapunzel leaned out the window, looking around, and Eileen leaned out as well, hauling herself on the roof of the car.
The axe buried itself inches from her face, and she let go with a shriek. “Eileen!” Rapunzel shouted, and something grabbed Eileen’s boot, only just managing to save her from falling. She craned her neck up, seeing Maximus holding the toe of her boot in his mouth.
“Oh my God oh my God oh my God-” Eileen said shrilly. She shoved the knife between her teeth to free her hands, ignoring the slight sting of it around the corners of her mouth, twisting herself to grab the car, climbing up onto the roof again.
The attacker was reaching for Rapunzel, and Eileen tackled him with a shout. He threw her off, and her knife flew away from her. She scrambled for it, but her leg went through the cable car ceiling. She yelped, trying to free herself, but the shadow of the man fell over her, and the axe was coming towards her-
It stopped, held back by golden hair. Rapunzel yanked back, and the man flew backwards. Eileen managed to grab his arm, using his momentum to free herself. The axe sliced the cable, and the car tilted dangerously again. The cable held together by the skin of its teeth, frayed and rusted.
Eileen managed to grab her knife. “Come on, Rapunzel!” She shouted, and Rapunzel followed her to the edge of the car. The man raised his axe again, and Eileen tensed to tackle him, though what good it would do she didn’t know.
“YAH!” Adira swung down from the cable wire out of nowhere, planting two feet in the center of the man’s chest and sending them sprawling.
“And now Adira’s here!” Eileen said, still panicky. “Sure, why not?!”
The two went at it, Adira focusing on dodging the man’s blows, probably not trusting herself to block without being outright overpowered. She was right to worry, though. The man managed to swing at her with his axe, and while she blocked him, her black sword flew out of her hand and over the side of the cable car. She turned, distracted for less than a second, but a second was all the man needed to kick her in the chest and send her flying over the side.
“Adira!” Rapunzel cried, but the woman disappeared into the mist below.
The man chopped into the cable car, the axe easily eating the weathered wood. The car tilted, and Rapunzel grabbed Eileen before lassoing her hair around the cable and jumping off when the car tilted downwards, half of it hanging off. The wire groaned.
Rapunzel opened the door, and Eileen helped her pull the group out and onto the stone cliff of the other side. She heard wood break, and glanced down to see the man crawling up towards them slowly. She managed to see his eyes, and they were filled with little else other than a steadfast zeal, though for what Eileen didn’t know.
She helped Fidella out, and the horse scrambled onto the solid ground. There wasn’t enough time, they had too-
“You and the others go!” Eileen said. “I’ll hold off Bearface!”
Rapunzel’s eyes widened. “But-”
“Now!” Eileen shouted, turning just in time to dodge a swipe from the man as he made it way over. She waved her knife, antagonizing him to attack her instead of the others, who were still evacuating.
It worked, unfortunately, and he lunged at her. Eileen stumbled, struggling to keep her footing on the car, and trying not to think about how high up she was with little success. After one particularly close dodge, she hazarded a look over, and saw everyone was out. She turned, preparing to make her way towards them, but the man took advantage of her distraction.
He grabbed her by the back of her shirt, throwing her forward. She landed roughly, and the knife flew out of her grip and over the side of the car. “No-!” She whipped her head back around to face her soon-to-be-murderer, her eyes wide and panicked.
The man raised his axe, and then suddenly froze. Eileen saw his eyes again, but this time they were wide in shock. And then fear. And then realization. And then grief. And then something she couldn’t even begin to identify.
The wire groaned again, and snapped.
“EILEEN!” She heard Rapunzel. “NO!”
Eileen fell into the chasm with a shriek, the last thing she saw being Rapunzel’s terrified face, reaching out for her uselessly.
*** *** ***
Eileen blinked her eyes open, her mouth tasting like dirt.
Her face was smushed against the ground, and when her eyes focused, she saw a black rock pointed to her face, inches from her forehead.
“Ow.” She grumbled.
She forced herself to roll over onto her back, relieved when her body protested the movement, but not enough to worry her. Somehow, by some miracle, she had made it out with only massive bruises.
She took a few deep breaths to steady herself, and then hauled herself to her feet. Her knife lay blade down in the dirt a few yards away. She sighed in relief, stumbling towards it.
A massive shadow appeared, and Eileen froze.
The bear headed man stood above her, so tall he blocked out the sun. Eileen swallowed, her throat dry, seeing he still gripped his massive axe. His finger tapped against the wood of the handle, almost as if thinking about his next move.
She dove for her knife, but the bear man was quicker, kicking it away. She landed clumsily in a heap upon the ground and bit her lip to keep from wincing. The shadow drew over her, and she forced herself to look at the man’s face, though she couldn’t see his eyes. He twirled the axe in his hand.
“What are you waiting for?” Eileen asked, her voice harsh and hoarse. “If you’re waiting for me to cry and beg for my life, you’re going to be here a long time.”
The man did not move, and Eileen spit, partially out of disrespect, partially to get the taste of soil out of her mouth. “Just do it.” She snapped, glaring at him.
“I’m not going to hurt you, Hannah.” The man said, and his voice was surprisingly soft.
“Hannah?” Eileen asked, though him calling her a different name was probably the least of her concerns.
He reached up, and pulled the bear head off. He was a large, pale man, with a long, thick beard and longer dark hair. His eyes were oddly sad, and he frowned. “I’m your father.”
*** *** ***
There were a lot of things Eileen could have said and wanted to say. She wanted to laugh, mostly, and then snap at him for whatever made him say this obviously wrong and very stupid lie.
Instead, she realized he was distracted, and she scrambled to her feet and dove for her knife.
The man shouted something, moving to stop her, but it was too late. Her hand gripped the handle, and she yanked it out of the dirt, swinging it behind her. The man backed away, and Eileen missed him by inches.
“Who are you?!” She demanded, though she realized a knife probably wasn’t the best defense against an axe and a man who was nearly three times her size. Her hair must have fallen out of her ponytail, because thick strands of dark hair fell in her face, partially obscuring her view. “Why were you trying to kill us?!”
“I didn’t realize it was you.” He said softly.
“Who fucking cares who I am?!” She didn’t know why she felt so panicky, she knew this man was lying. Or delusional. Or simply mistaken. But most likely, he was just trying to throw her off balance so he could have a chance to kill her later.
But he had a chance to kill you already…
“I care,” The man said. “You’re my daughter.”
“My parents are dead.” Eileen snapped, though she didn’t know if that was true. That was simply what she had chosen to believe. It was nicer than the alternative.
“No.” He said, infuriatingly calm. He took a step closer. “I’m right here, aren’t I?”
“Back the fuck up!” She snapped, hating how pitchy her voice was. “If you take another fucking step, I swear to God I’ll gut you!”
“Okay, okay…” The man held his hands up in a placating gesture. He took a step back. “No need to get worked up, Hannah. I won’t hurt you.”
“Funny, you didn’t seem to have a problem with it a couple minutes ago.” She snapped, holding the knife up. She was suddenly aware she was shaking. “And my name’s not Hannah. It’s Eileen. I don’t know who this Hannah is, but you’ve got the wrong person.”
“I don’t,” He said, and she hated how soft his voice was. “It’s you, Hannah. I know it is.”
“Stop calling me-” She grit her teeth, closing her eyes for a second when a wave of dizziness came over her. “Why were you trying to stop us.” She said, her voice quiet, but a harsh demand in her voice.
“I can show you,” The man said. “Come with me.”
Every single fiber in Eileen’s being wanted to bolt, to run far away from this strange man who claimed he knew her and wouldn’t hurt her. She also wanted to attack, drive him away and make him stop talking and stop these lies because they had to be lies, they couldn’t be true there was no way-
But…
Rapunzel can get into the Dark Kingdom more easily if I distract him, She told herself. Now is no time to be selfish.
“I’ll go with you if you drop the axe.” Eileen said.
The man nodded, tossing it aside. It hit the ground with a loud clang, and Eileen was proud of how she buried her flinch. “Come on,” He said, starting to walk. “We have a lot to discuss.”
*** *** ***
“Don’t worry, it’s actually quite an interesting story,” King Edmund said, seeming totally nonchalant leading Eileen down the dark and twisting halls of the castle, despite the fact that Eileen still held her knife up. “And it starts with the moon.”
“Long ago, a single drop of moonlight fell from the heavens. And from this small drop of moonlight, formed a single, seductive opal,” He held up the weak lantern, and there was a stained glass window showing off the process, the exact one that Eileen had seen a million times on the scroll. “It had the ability to destroy any and all who would seek to possess it.”
He continued walking, and Eileen rushed after him. “Centuries passed, and this opal’s defenses spread, and from that grew a kingdom. A kingdom founded by our ancestors.” He gestured to more stained glass windows, each one depicting some great warrior, all dressed in black, all their faces screwed up in a warrior scowl.
Your ancestors, Eileen thought, but didn’t say anything.
“Generation after generation of our bloodline have stood guard here, helping to protect the world from the opal’s limitless power. Until…” He sighed, suddenly looking ashamed. “I tried to take the opal and destroy it myself in a fit of passion. And it didn’t...go too well.”
“In the fallout, I commanded my subjects to leave and never return. Even…” He looked back at her, and Eileen stepped back, startled by his open grief. “Even you.”
“Kind of a shit move,” She said before she could stop herself. “For whoever Hannah is. Because it’s not me.” She said quickly.
Edmund didn’t rise to her bait. “I sent my most trusted soldiers out into the world to ensure this power be kept a secret. For if it ever fell into the wrong hands, it would mean certain doom. These knights called themselves the Brotherhood.”
He pushed open a door to a new room, a large dining hall. It was dim and eerie, shadows scuttling around the corner like rats, and a few rocks poked through the marble floor as if to remind Eileen they still needed to be seen. “Welcome home.” Edmund said.
“This isn’t-” She huffed. “Can you...stop with that? I’m not Hannah. I’m Eileen. You haven’t...you haven’t given me any sort of proof that I’m who you think I am. I’m just Eileen.”
“It’s your eyes.” Edmund said, stepping forward. Eileen stumbled back, raising her knife. “I can tell a lot about a person by looking into their eyes. Also,” He looked up, and there was the scraggly raven from before, sitting on a rock. “My ravens have been following you ever since you left.”
“Oh, alright,” Eileen said dully. “You’ve been stalking me with corvids. Of course, that makes total sense.”
He handed her several old wanted posters that had been stacked at the edge of the staircase. “They seem to be under the impression that you’re a man.”
“I-” Eileen said, unsure, sifting through countless posters, all of them seeming to capture her old scowl perfectly, if nothing else. “What...what in fuck?”
“I think this reunion is off to a great start!” Edmund said cheerfully. “We’re finding common ground, exchanging stories. I just might win her over yet!”
“I…” Eileen frowned. “What?”
“Oh!” He chuckled. “Apologies, I must be speaking my thoughts out loud...I have been alone a long time. How’s this?” He coughed. “You are unaware of what I’m thinking now, correct?”
“Christ Almighty.” Eileen said.
“Hmph,” Edmund scowled, seeming to take her answer as a ‘no’. “I will work on that skill.”
He went down the stairs, and Eileen followed him, not wanting to be alone in this awful place, even if the only other person she could be around was this strange man who still seemed to think she was his daughter.
“Over time, my ravens lost track of you.” Edmund said. The raggedy raven from before tried to land on the table, but misjudged the distance, and ended up face planting into the table. “See what I have to work with?” He said.
“Right, well, this has been…” Eileen tried to find a word for it, but gave up. “But I need to find my friends, let them know I’m not at the bottom of a ravine bleeding out. Make sure they’re okay. Make sure Rapunzel is okay.”
“As long as she stays away from the Moonstone, she will be.” Edmund said.
“But she can’t.” Eileen said, feeling her patience wear thin. Much more of this and she was going to do something destructive and stupid. “She’s the Sundrop.”
“You don’t know that she is, Hannah.” Edmund said.
“Stop!” Eileen burst out, feeling an ugly twist of anger in her gut. “Stop...calling me Hannah! That’s not my name! I don’t know who you are! You don’t know who I am!”
“You’re my daughter.” Edmund said, perfectly calm.
For some reason, Eileen’s vision went red. This stupid, stupid man who seemed to think she was actually Hannah, spoke his thoughts out loud and would just not lose his calm demeanor and get angry with her-
“I’M NOT YOUR DAUGHTER!” Eileen nearly shrieked, and Edmund blinked at her outburst.
“I had you sent far, far away years ago,” Edmund said, facing a roaring fire. “And now, after all this time, you end up on my doorstep. With this!”
He pulled out a long, black sword. It was Adira’s, the one she had dropped when fighting Edmund up on the trolley. Eileen stumbled back with a yelp when he swung it-
-and cut the top off of one of the rocks. It fell to the ground, cracking the marble floor. “A weapon capable of destroying the Moonstone!” Edmund smiled. “We can destroy it together!”
“‘We’?!” Eileen repeated. “Absolutely not. For several reasons, but one of those reasons is that those black rocks made a path for Rapunzel, leading her here-”
“Leading you here to put an end to the Moonstone!” Edmund interrupted. “It can get into your head, fill it with thoughts. That’s what it’s doing to your friend. That’s what it did to me, and I nearly destroyed my own kingdom.”
“Seems like you already did.” Eileen said, not bothering to hide the spite in her voice.
Edmund winced, the first real reaction to any of Eileen’s jabs. “I barely survived,” He said softly. “But...not everyone was so fortunate.”
He looked above the fire, and Eileen followed his gaze to see a large portrait. Edmund was in it, his arm resting gently on the shoulder of a young woman, who smiled like she knew a secret and was just dying to share.
The woman looked exactly like Eileen.
“And that,” Edmund said softly. “Is how I know you’re Hannah. You look exactly like her. So much so I thought you were her ghost for a moment.”
Eileen stepped back, suddenly very, very dizzy. “No.” She breathed softly.
“Perhaps it isn’t Rapunzel’s destiny to grab the Moonstone,” Edmund said. “But your’s to save her from doing so.”
“No, I…” Eileen felt nauseous, and was unable to tear her eyes away from the portrait. “This isn’t my story.”
“I don’t think it’s only Rapunzel’s either,” Edmund said. “We all have a part to play, it may be time for you to fulfill your’s. Don’t allow the same fate to befall her. The Moonstone is an object of destruction. If she is the Sundrop...I don’t know what will happen to her, but I don’t think it will be good.”
“I…” Eileen forced herself to look away. “You’re lying. You...you’re lying to me. This...this is all some trick, some hoax to get me to do something stupid.”
Edmund was quiet, regarding her with an unreadable expression. “Hannah-”
“No,” Eileen waved her knife, but it suddenly felt useless. “Don’t...don’t talk to me! Stay back!”
Edmund pursed his lips, looking sad, but didn’t stop her as she ducked away.
She ran down the halls, immediately getting lost in the labyrinth of dark halls that looked identical, before her knees finally gave out and she tripped painfully. Her knife clattered to the ground, and she curled up behind a decorative suit of armor, giving into the panic that had been building up inside of her since she read that damn fortune.
Thinking about it just made it harder to breathe. Betrayal, betrayal. Someone would betray Rapunzel. She hadn’t even considered the possibility it could be herself, because she would never, ever do something like that. She trusted herself enough to do that. But after what Edmund (her father) had told her…
Would she betray Rapunzel, if it meant she might be safe? Rapunzel would never forgive her, surely, but was it worth it? Had she come all this way just to lose the love of her life one way or another?
She gasped for air, and the room spun. She hugged her knees close to her chest, squeezing her eyes tightly to keep in tears. It was all too much, way too much at once. And she was so, so tired. She hadn’t had a good night’s sleep since the disaster at the Great Tree, and it was starting to show.
There was a squawk, and she opened her eyes to see that damn raven, looking at her with crossed, stupid eyes. “Piss off.” She growled, kicking at it. It squawked again, managing to dodge her.
There was an awful creaking, and Eileen stood up, seeing a massive door start to open. She fumbled for her knife, wondering what in the hell could possibly be going wrong now-
“Eileen!” Rapunzel said, right outside the door, looking relieved. “You’re okay! Adira said she saw you crawl into a cave, how did you get in here?”
“I’m good like that.” Eileen said, though her voice sounded shaky and thick even to her. She glanced at Adira, and clenched her teeth at the woman’s expression. She knew. She could see it in her eyes.
Adira almost imperceptibly shook her head. She hadn’t told them what she had witnessed, and Eileen held in a sigh of relief.
“Eileen?” Rapunzel asked, suddenly concerned. “You look awful. Are you okay?”
“I did just fall off a mountain. Sorry if I don’t look fantastic.” Eileen smiled, but it felt just as fragile.
Rapunzel started to step forward, but paused when Eileen suddenly moved back, as if repelled by her presence. “Eileen?” Rapunzel asked softly. “What’s wrong?”
I can’t let her die, even if she hates me for the rest of her life, at least she’ll be around to hate me.
“I’m sorry,” Eileen said, and didn’t care how raw her voice sounded. “I...I can’t let you in.”
Something snapped, and Eileen realized that the chain that Lance and Cassandra were using to open the door had snapped in half. The door slammed closed quickly, but not quickly enough for Eileen to miss Rapunzel’s face.
Her expression was one of shock, and complete and utter betrayal.
The light from the door disappeared, and for the second time in her recent memory, Eileen broke down into sobs in the darkness of the cold, empty castle.
Notes:
I have many headcanons about Eugene/Eileen's mother that I will never be able to use unfortunately due to reasons that will become clear on friday.
oh lord we in it now
Chapter 14: Icarus to Your Certainty (Part Two)
Notes:
good morning everyone. god has let me live another day, and im about to make you wish he didnt
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Eileen left, running down the halls before Edmund could find her and see her tears. She would not let him see her like this, no matter what.
She managed to find a quiet corner, and collapsed into it, shaking and unsuccessfully trying to bite back whimpers. “Fuck,” She sobbed. “God, fuck...fuck it all, Christ…”
This was it, this was really it. All that time, all that work, all that pain, all that love, just to throw it away at the end.
“Fuck.” She sniffled, forcing herself to swallow the painful lump in her throat, ashamed of her weakness. She leaned against the wall, appreciating the coolness of it, and took a long, slow breath.
“You’re fine,” She muttered to herself. “You’re fine. Suck it up. Crying’s not gonna fix anything.”
She needed to leave, go and start a new life somewhere. She wondered, vaguely, if Marie would let her hang around. Probably not, and she had left that person she once was behind long ago anyway.
She scrubbed the tears away, and then realized she had probably only made herself more red-faced. “Fuck.” She grumbled again, and stood up quickly when she heard footsteps. She sniffed, an ugly sound, and forced herself to take another breath.
Edmund rounded the corner, looking determined. If he noticed her bedraggled appearance, he didn’t comment on it, and Eileen was grateful for that at least. “She’s gonna try to come in anyway.” She said, and her voice was mostly stable.
“Then we must get to the Moonstone first!” Edmund said. He pushed open a door, and unable to see any better options, she followed.
Her mouth dropped open. Massive statues, at least fifty feet tall, lined the halls, each one glaring down with the same, upset expression. There was an empty pedestal, covered with old wanted posters of herself, and Eileen felt a chill run down her spine.
“These statues,” She said softly. “Are they…?” She didn’t want to finish the sentence, cement in her mind what she knew had to be true.
“They’re our ancestors,” Edmund said. “Generation after generation have sacrificed to keep this stone hidden from the world. And now, you’re here to help me destroy it, once and for all, and take your place among them.”
Eileen looked up at the unhappy faces on the statue, a long line of pain and suffering, and felt nausea rise in her throat. If it was a legacy of sadness and failure, she supposed she was doing her part in keeping the family tradition.
She physically winced when she thought of these...these statues as family, but Edmund didn’t seem to notice. He pushed open a large, ornate door, and a bright glow came from it, and Eileen stepped back slightly.
The room was massive, and covered in black rocks, their points focused on a bright blue glow in the center of the room, the glow surrounded by a black, holed covered that reminded her of coral, for some reason. “There it is, Hannah,” Edmund said softly. “The Moonstone.”
It was beautiful, but in the way a hurricane was beautiful. Deadly and powerful, and willing to sweep you up along inside. She thought she heard a whisper, but she couldn’t be sure, and wasn’t feeling brave enough to check.
Edmund drew the long, black sword, marching towards the Moonstone. Eileen stood still, not wanting to go anywhere near the thing. “No longer shall it’s burden fall upon us,” Edmund said. “For all that stands between us and our destiny is this bridge.” He motioned to the delicate stone bridge that led to the Moonstone.
As if just waiting for him to say that, two massive rocks shot through the bridge, missing Edmund by inches. He stumbled back, and the bridge collapsed. “Shit-” Eileen stumbled back.
Edmund frowned. “I’ll...go get a rope.”
*** *** ***
Eileen didn’t know why, but staring at the piles of wanted posters on the empty pedestal, she wanted to set them all on fire, and didn’t care all too much if she went up in flames with it.
Everything was gone that she cared about anyway. Everything she had thought she had known about herself had been a lie. She had betrayed her friends in desperation and was probably never going to see them again.
I’m never going to see Rapunzel again. And if I do, she’ll hate me.
Part of her still railed and screamed at Edmund, and she still somewhat wanted to pick a fight. But she was so, so incredibly tired, and just thinking about it made her want to curl up and sleep for a thousand years.
She sat on the pedestal, and took in her destiny, the new identity that she hated so very much. Hannah, lonely and untrustworthy princess, heir to an empty and lifeless kingdom.
She put her head in her hand, feeling dizzy. That happened a lot these days, and she just wanted to sleep. “Fuck.” She whispered to herself.
The ground shook, as it had been doing for the last half hour or so, perhaps the Moonstone sensing the Sundrop so close. It had been scary at first, but now...Eileen just sighed, waiting for it to stop, not even bothering to look up.
She heard a chittering, and her heart skipped a beat. She looked up, and saw a familiar green lizard managing to push open and slip through a door. “Pascal?!” She hissed.
He squeaked, scuttling towards her. “What...what are you doing here?!”
He glared at her, turning red, and squeaked. Eileen sighed. “I...I know you’re mad at me. I didn’t have a choice.”
Pascal blew a raspberry at her, and she rolled her eyes. She scooped him up, and he scurried up onto her shoulder. “As it turns out, this is where I come from.” She said, and smiled in spite of herself when Pascal turned green again, his little reptile mouth open in shock. It was easier to talk to Pascal. Probably because he couldn’t talk back.
“Yeah, shitty plot twist, right?” She chuckled, and then frowned. “I know we brought Rapunzel here to grab the stone, but...things have changed. Last time someone tried to destroy the Moonstone, it...people got hurt.” She frowned, thinking of the kind-faced woman who looked identical to her in the portrait.
Pascal nudged her cheek in a comforting manner, and she stroked his head. “What if...what if we lost Rapunzel?”
Pascal squeaked angrily at her as if he couldn’t imagine such a thing. He scuttled down to her bag, digging around and bringing out that damn fortune. Eileen frowned. She hadn’t even realized she had it with her.
She pulled out the slip of paper, reading it over and over again. She sighed deeply, and then ripped the tiny paper piece apart in a sudden fit of rage. She was panting when she watched the little pieces float to the ground like snow.
Pascal squeaked, questioning. She sighed deeply. “Oh, damn it all to hell.” She looked at the little lizard, who perked up. Her decision felt hard and ugly in the pit of her stomach, but she knew Rapunzel would never stop, and she wanted...she wanted to apologize. It might be her only chance to do so. “Where is she? We gotta find them.”
She took off down the hall, Pascal in her hand. “Where the fuck is the door?!”
*** *** ***
“Oh my God.” Eileen panted, leaning against the wall, panting. She glanced at Pascal. “How many hallways does this place have?!”
Pascal squeaked at her to keep going, and she waved him off. “Yeah, yeah, we gotta keep going. I didn’t see you sprinting for fifteen minutes straight.”
There was shouting from down the hall, and Eileen glanced at Pascal, who chittered nervously. She sprinted towards the yelling, realizing she had made a loop around the castle and was back in the room filled with angry statues. “You’re not getting past me.” Edmund was saying, standing in front of the door to the Moonstone, gripping the sword a bit too tightly for Eileen’s liking.
“Get away from her!” Eileen shouted, bursting in.
It was a sight to behold. The group lay, stunned and dispatched by Edmund, presumably, and Rapunzel stood tall, unafraid of the bear king, her golden hair glowing brightly, seeming to pull her towards the room where the Moonstone presided.
Rapunzel turned to her, eyes lighting up. “Eileen!”
She doesn’t hate me! Wait, there’s bigger things to focus on-
“You have to let her in,” Eileen said. “She’s the Sundrop.” Pascal chittered his encouragement, and it did help, oddly.
“The Moonstone must be destroyed, Hannah!” Edmund said, and Eileen barely kept herself from screaming at him for the false name. Rapunzel looked confused, but didn’t say anything. Edmund turned his attention to her, and Rapunzel ducked around him and rushed to the door.
“No!” Edmund shouted, but the castle rumbled, and Rapunzel’s hair stopped glowing. Something flashed brightly behind the closed door, and Rapunzel stepped back, startled.
“What’s going on?!” Lance asked.
“It can’t be…” Edmund breathed. “For centuries, my ancestors have sworn to protect this threshold. And now, their spirits have arisen to uphold this oath.”
“What,” Eileen said incredulously. “Like ghosts?”
Of course, the very second she said that, wispy figures, howling nonsensically, emerged from the statues, swooping down on the group like the ravens had not so long ago. Eileen swung at one with her fist, and was somewhat surprised to feel it connect with something solid. The ghost shrieked, and flew away, insulted.
“Eileen!” She turned to see Rapunzel running towards her, holding her frying pan tightly. Eileen grinned, and leaned down, locking her fingers together. Rapunzel stepped up, and Eileen pushed her up at the same time Rapunzel jumped, giving her an extra foot of height to her leap.
She whacked a ghost hard with her frying pan, and it tumbled ungracefully through the air with a wail. “Pretty crappy ghosts!” Eileen said. “What’s the use of being one if you can’t fly through walls and shit?”
Rapunzel smiled, and Eileen’s heart did a little flip flop. “I’m sorry,” Eileen said, her stomach twisting more and more with the weight of what was to come. “I’m sorry for everything.”
“I have to do this,” Rapunzel said softly. “You know I do.”
“I know,” Eileen said. “I know you won’t give up.”
Rapunzel smiled, and it seemed to light up the room. “I’ll be fine.”
Eileen opened her mouth, and she almost said I love you.
And she should have, because this was likely the last time she would have an opportunity to do so. Instead, she closed her mouth, and nodded, stoic.
Rapunzel smiled, and made a break for the Moonstone.
“Stop!” Edmund shouted, sprinting after her, reaching out, and Eileen saw red.
She rushed Edmund, lunging at him and managing to knock him off his feet. “Don’t you fucking dare!” She yelled shrilly. “You have to stop these ghosts!”
“Even if I could,” Edmund said, rising to his feet, finally looking angry. “She must never enter that room.”
He stood up to his full height, and before Eileen could react, he grabbed her arm, swinging her around and throwing her across the room. She yelped, hitting the marble floor roughly and jostling her badly bruised body.
She heard a whinny, and Maximus burst into the room. She tried to scramble to her feet, but Edmund grabbed her, pinning her against the wall, ignoring her shouts for him to put her down.
“She can’t be allowed in!” Edmund said. “It’s your destiny to destroy the Moonstone!”
“My destiny was to die!” She practically screamed, pleased when Edmund looked knocked off kilter for once. “Not that you would know that, you fucking abandoned me!”
She knew everyone must be staring at her, but right now, she couldn’t have cared less, too busy with the awful pit of anger in her stomach that had really been building up for most of her life. “I thought at best my parents were dead, and at worst I was tossed aside! And now...now I finally had a place, and it didn’t matter where I came from! But you…” She jerked her knee up, and her knife flew into her hand. Edmund backed up, looking startled.
“Then you come along, and I find out the latter was correct.” She hissed, realizing with terror that her anger was starting to burn out and was being replaced by a deep, deep hurt.
“I did what I thought was best,” Edmund said. “I wanted to keep you safe.”
“And you saw all the wanted posters,” Eileen said. “So you knew I wasn’t. I…” She pushed useless, hurt-filled questions away. Now wasn’t the time, but they bubbled up in her anyway, queries of whether she hadn’t been good enough, had been a burden. Had the ravens seen her when she had been nearly murdered by Stalyan and decided she was too weak? Had they seen her stumble in and out of jail and Marie’s arms like a rotating door and decided she was heartless? Had they seen her run when Lance was arrested and decide she was treacherous? What was so wrong, so broken, so empty with her that they had lost her and never returned? That Edmund had never returned?
She swallowed the questions. They didn’t matter. “We’ve come to put an end to all this. You have to let us through.”
Edmund set his jaw. “How...how can you be sure?”
“You said you can tell a lot by looking into someone’s eyes,” Eileen said, forcing herself to lower her knife. “Look at mine. We’re here to end this. It’s gone on long enough.”
Edmund didn’t move, staring at her with an odd grief. “You look and sound just like your mother.” He said softly.
Eileen grimaced, and rushed past him to Rapunzel and the rest of the group, circled up. “Eileen, is he…?” Rapunzel asked.
“Can we talk about this later? We’re about to get super murdered by ghosts.” Eileen said, watching the spectres circle them furiously.
“You’re probably right.” Rapunzel admitted. She ducked when a ghost came at her, and hit it with a frying pan. “But we’re talking about this later!”
“Oh goody, conversations about emotions.” Eileen said.
Cassandra sliced a ghost in half, but it just re-emerged from it’s statue, wailing. “They keep coming back!” She said.
“We need something stronger!” Lance said. “Like…” He paused, and spotted Adira’s sword, sitting in the corner of the room. He made a break for it, grabbing it and slicing one of the statues. The ghost that corresponded to the statue wailed, and disappeared.
“Lance, you’re a genius!” Eileen cheered.
The ghosts converged on Lance, and he tossed the sword to Adira, who caught it easily before slicing into two statues, poofing two more ghosts. She passed it to Maximus, who passed it to Cassandra, and then Rapunzel, and then finally, Eileen caught it, sprinting across the room to the final statue.
A ghostly axe nearly decapitated her, and she stumbled, sword flying out of her grip and across the room. “No!” She yelped, but she flipped onto her back, reaching for her knife when the ghost raised its axe, though she hardly knew what a dinky knife was going to do against a ghost axe and really she should consider expanding her weapons arsenal-
The ghost suddenly disappeared in a blast of air, and Eileen coughed when it blew onto her. It smelled like dust and moths.
Edmund stood at the cracked statue, sword in his hand. “Our family is just awful.” He said.
“A little.” Eileen panted, hauling herself to her feet, only to nearly be knocked over again when Rapunzel tackled her in a tight hug. She winced slightly, but hugged back, trying not to shake.
Edmund was quiet for a moment, looking at Rapunzel. “It’s up to you now.” He said softly.
“No,” Rapunzel said, holding onto Eileen’s hand with her right and grabbing Cassandra’s with her left. “It’s up to us.”
Rapunzel opened the door, and the three of them walked into the chamber of the Moonstone.
*** *** ***
The energy in the room was tangible. Eileen could feel it prickle on her skin like a spider, and the hairs on the back of her neck stood up. Pascal made a nervous noise, and she scratched his head in an attempt to reassure him, though she felt just as awful.
“We made it.” Rapunzel said, looking around the room in open awe.
Rapunzel hair began to glow, and it floated as if being dragged by an invisible wind. The rocks in the room lit up, and the ones that weren’t already shifted to fixate on the Moonstone did so, rumbling ominously. The entire room lit up blue, and Rapunzel stepped to the edge of the ruined bridge.
And then the rocks went black again, and the only light in the room was Rapunzel’s hair and the Moonstone. Rapunzel stepped out, and Eileen went to grab her-
But the bridge reformed under her feet with a gentle hum, and she continued onwards towards the Moonstone without a word. Eileen glanced at Cassandra, and the latter nodded, a stoic expression on her face. Slowly, they followed after Rapunzel.
Rapunzel paused when she made it to the threshold, and looked back at the two. “It’s time.” Cassandra said softly.
Rapunzel smiled, and glanced at Eileen, who took a deep breath. “This is it, Blondie,” She said quietly. “Your destiny.”
Rapunzel smiled, and once again Eileen was caught off guard by how completely, and utterly perfect she was.
She stepped forward, and the Moonstone glowed brightly in her presence. The coral-like guard faded, and the Moonstone drifted out, suspended in the air. Eileen stared at it, sure her mouth was open in slack-jawed amazement.
For a moment, the world was still.
Cassandra lurched forward suddenly-
“I’m sorry, Blondie.”
Another hand grabbed the Moonstone, and the world exploded into light and agony.
Notes:
Oh, Your Love is Sunlight will return on December 18th.
Thank you for reading. Feel free to message me on my Tumblr and bug me about anything.
See you soon,
Grey
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cr1ngeculture on Chapter 1 Thu 27 Jan 2022 10:40PM UTC
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green_tea_and_honey on Chapter 7 Wed 18 Nov 2020 04:13AM UTC
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Delta_Dina (Guest) on Chapter 11 Wed 02 Dec 2020 01:05AM UTC
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Delta_Dina (Guest) on Chapter 13 Mon 07 Dec 2020 08:55PM UTC
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