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“Jane, this is Nihlus,” Saren says, gesturing to the turian beside him. He’s slightly shorter than Saren – still making him about a head taller than Jane – with brown skin and elaborate white tattoos across the entirety of his face and part of his crest. Saren has had her memorize all the turian colonies and all the variations of their markings; if she's not mistaken, Nihlus is from the turian colony Icaendis. “He’s our newest Spectre; the second-youngest to ever be inducted.”
She extends her hand out of instinct, then goes to pull it back. Since she began living with Saren she’s come to understand turian customs. Their greetings are different from humans’. But Nihlus reaches out and returns the gesture.
“A pleasure to meet you,” he says, shaking her hand.
Jane smiles, relieved she hasn't offended him. “Pleasure’s all mine.”
*
“No, here, hold it like this,” Nihlus says, adjusting her hands on the gun. “Arms straight- yes, just like that. Good. Line up your shot. Fire when you’re ready.”
Jane narrows her eyes, trying to line up the head of the target with the pistol’s sight. She fires.
“Headshot!” Nihlus declares. He grins and claps his hand on her shoulder. “Good job, Jane. You’re getting better.”
She smiles and looks down, suddenly bashful.
*
At first he thinks he’s seeing things. He’s in a bar on the Citadel, trying to see if he can get some intel from the bartender. When he glances out at the walkway, he sees a young human girl walk past. Dark red hair, green eyes, her arms wrapped around herself.
Of course it couldn’t be Jane. Saren would go crazy if he knew she was in the Lower Wards-
Shit, that is Jane.
He gets up without a word and follows her. For a couple minutes he tails her, trying to see where she’s going. But it becomes apparent that Jane isn’t going anywhere. She’s simply...going. Nihlus walks up behind her and sets a hand on her shoulder. She jumps and turns around. “Jane? What are you doing here?”
Jane looks down and shoves her hands into the pockets of her hoodie. She shrugs.
“Are you lost?” he asks.
“Yeah,” she says.
“You shouldn’t be down here by yourself,” he says.
Jane looks away. “Saren has an assignment; I didn’t want to stay there alone. So I just…walked.”
Oh. Oh. That makes sense; Saren mentioned she’s been having nightmares. No doubt the girl is still traumatized from what happened on Mindoir. It was months ago, he knows, and Saren thinks she should be over it by now. But Nihlus knows those wounds will take a lot longer to heal. “You should have called me; I’ll come over to keep you company if you need it.”
She looks back at him, surprised. “I didn’t want to bother you.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he says. “If I’m not on a mission, I’ll come if you need me.”
Jane’s face lights up, and Nihlus can’t help but smile.
*
She wakes up in the middle of the night, screaming and tangled in her sheets. Saren is away. She calls Nihlus.
He’s at her side in twenty minutes. In fifty, she falls asleep beside him.
*
“Red one,” she says.
Nihlus watches as a car flies past. What is it with all these red models lately? At this rate he’s going to lose. “I’m starting to think you’re cheating.”
Jane laughs. He likes the sound of it; turians are raised to restrain their emotions. Be angry, but don’t go into a rage. Mourn, but never sob. Laugh, but never too loud. Humans, however, don’t live like that. At least, humans on Mindoir didn’t. Jane’s laughter is loud, unrestrained. You always know exactly how she feels, and he likes that about her.
“How could I cheat at counting cars?” she asks, dangling her feet off the balcony.
“You humans are tricky like that,” Nihlus teases. He spots a blue one flying past. “Blue one.”
“How many is that?”
“Twelve.”
“Liar.”
“Ok, ok, ten.”
“And I’m the tricky one?”
*
She enjoys their walks. Sometimes they go in the middle of the day, when there’s a million people out and ten million things going on. Sometimes they go in the middle of the night, and she walks around in sweat pants and a hoodie. Nihlus doesn’t seem to mind; he knows that sometimes she has to just walk and talk and forget.
On one of their late night walks, she brings up her family.
“My family used to take trips into town together every Sunday,” she says. “The closest one was about an hour away. Me and my brother loved it. Usually the only other kids we had to play with were each other. But in town, there were plenty of them.”
Nihlus chuckles slightly. “I bet you were cute; little Jane running around, scaring the hell out of all the little boys.”
“I didn’t scare anyone!” she laughs.
“You’d certainly scare them now; your aim is improving. And Saren tells me your biotics are getting stronger,” Nihlus says. “I’d hate to run into you on the battlefield, at least.”
Jane smiles.
*
He does it without thinking. When he goes to leave the apartment, he leans down and presses his forehead to hers. For a moment Nihlus freezes, praying that despite the fact she’s been living with a turian for over a year she won’t know what the gesture means.
The sudden flush in her cheeks and the way her eyes widen tell him all he needs to know.
“Jane, I-” he stammers, starting to apologize.
She stands up on her toes and plants a small kiss on his mouth. Nihlus stands there, frozen. For a moment they just look at each other. Jane smiles. His mandibles flare.
“…don’t you have to go see the Council?” she says finally.
“Huh? Oh- oh, right. Um, yeah. I should…yeah. I’ll…ahem. We’ll talk later,” he says, backing out of the apartment. The door closes, and they both stand on either side of it feeling like complete idiots.
*
“Thank you for bringing me along,” Jane says, walking beside Saren. She glances up at him. “I’m glad I got to see an actual trial for once.”
Saren doesn’t look at her. “It was an educational experience, nothing more.”
“Educational, boring beyond belief…” Nihlus says, making her laugh. Saren shoots them both a sharp look. “You have to admit it wasn’t exactly the most riveting trial the Citadel’s ever seen. And I was a witness.”
His mentor shakes his head and sighs. “It’s like babysitting children.”
“I didn’t have a hard time paying attention,” Jane remarks. “One of the people they called to the stand was actually very cute.”
She smiles at Nihlus, and he smiles back.
Saren looks at them, confused. Just as he’s about to dismiss it as mere foolishness, the realization hits him. He looks back and forth between them. Suddenly he realizes he introduced his young, impressionable adoptive daughter to a dashing young Spectre. And, on top of that, has given them ample amounts of alone time. Now they’re flirting. Right in front of him.
Spirits, he thinks.
*
“Jane’s come a long way,” Saren remarks.
“She’s a crack shot now,” Nihlus says, reloading his gun. “How are her biotics coming along?”
“She managed to throw me against a wall yesterday,” Saren says. There’s a hint of pride there that only someone who has been his student could recognize. “But she’s getting older now; there’s a lot of changes on the horizon. I’m sure human boys will be after her soon enough. And human girls.”
Nihlus doesn’t comment. Instead he fires, hitting the target in the chest.
“And turian boys,” Saren says, glancing at him. In that moment Nihlus remembers what true fear feels like.
“She’s – ah – a bit young for me,” Nihlus says, aiming again.
“Only four years,” Saren says. He reloads his gun. “Not much of an age difference in the grand scheme of things. But I just want you to know. If you touch her-”
He fires off a round of eight perfect headshots, then looks pointedly at Nihlus. “Understand?”
Spirits help him. “Understood.”
*
“I’m joining the Alliance,” she says suddenly.
Nihlus looks at her in surprise. There had always been some unspoken agreement between her and Saren as to what he was training her for, and Nihlus knew it. The first human Spectre, mentored by Saren Arterius himself. She pulls her knees up to her chest.
The first human Spectre, climbing her way to the top on a mountain of bodies.
No, she wouldn’t do that. She wouldn’t let herself become like him.
“The Alliance?” he repeats.
She nods. She prays he won’t hate her for it, too.
Nihlus is silent for a time. They watch the cars fly past. A blue one goes by, and he doesn’t point it out. She sets her chin on her knees.
Finally he says, “I’ll miss you.”
Jane looks at him in surprise. “You’re not mad?”
“You’ve got to find your own way, Jane,” he says. “Just…keep in touch, alright?”
She wonders what this means for them. There has been…something there, for a long time now. But being light years apart makes a relationship that much harder. Whatever there is between them, they both understand it’ll have to wait. Or just…never happen. The thought upsets her. But that’s just how it is. “I will. I’m going to miss you, too.”
Nihlus looks back out at the cars. “You’ll go far in the Alliance. They’re damn lucky to have you. Damn lucky.”
They sit in silence and watch the cars go past, knowing it will be the last time they’ll have an evening like this.
*
As soon as it hits the feeds, Nihlus calls her.
His image is projected in front of her. He crosses his arms and smiles. “How’s it feel to be a war hero, Commander Shepard?”
She’s exhausted. Parts of her hurt that she didn’t even know existed. But the battle is over, and she can rest. Shepard sets her head on her arms and smiles tiredly. “Sore. Very, very sore. My implant was damaged, but not too bad. They let me out of med bay pretty quick.”
“I saw the footage,” Nihlus says. His voice is filled with an admiration that makes her blush, despite the fact she’s now twenty-two years old. “You were amazing.”
“Thanks, Nihlus,” she says, smiling.
“Tell me you’re getting an award for that.”
“I am. Star of Terra. The ceremony will be on Earth in a couple of weeks.”
Nihlus smiles. “I’ll be there.”
*
Shepard stands at attention with Anderson, awaiting the arrival of their ‘guest’. The doors open and a turian walks on board. When she sees him, she can’t help but grin.
“Commander Shepard, this is Nihlus Kryik,” Anderson says.
They shake hands. “It’s been a long time, Kryik. What brings you aboard the Normandy?”
“Your commander will fill you in soon enough, I’m sure,” Nihlus says. “Perhaps once the mission is over, we’ll have a chance to catch up?”
An unspoken question. There was always something between them; Nihlus wants to know if it’s still there. Shepard smiles. “I’d like that a lot.”
*
“I was hoping you’d get here before Anderson,” Nihlus says as she walks into the briefing room. She looks so different now. So mature, so confident, so…well, beautiful. It’s amazing that the young girl Saren introduced him to all those years ago had turned into such a marvelous, capable commander. “It’s been a long time, Jane.”
“It sure has,” she says, smiling. “It’s been…jeez, it’s been seven years since we’ve seen each other in person.”
“I remember.” He’d taken leave just to go to Earth and watch them give her the Star of Terra. (He asked Saren to come with him, but of course he flat out refused.) “It’s hard to get together now that you’re off saving colonies and working on top-of-the-line ships and I’m off doing work for the Council.”
Jane brushes a strand of hair back behind her ear. They made her cut it when she joined the Alliance, which is a shame. Nihlus always enjoyed looking at her hair. It was such a rich shade of red, it reminded him of fire. “Well, maybe we’ll be able to find some time to catch up since you’re back on the Normandy.”
“And maybe a bit more after that. I think our schedules will start lining up soon,” Nihlus says. “I’ll be honest- this isn’t a shake-down run, and you know it.”
“I gathered,” she replies.
“Anderson will fill you in. But I’m here to observe you. The Council is considering you for a position in the Spectres, and my observation is their final deciding point,” Nihlus says. “This will be the first of many missions together, I’m sure.”
Her eyes widen slightly. “Isn’t that a bit of a conflict of interests? You know me, after all.”
He shrugs. “I volunteered, and they trusted me enough to be unbiased. But don’t go thinking that I’ll let you off easy; if you screw up, I will tell them.”
Shepard chuckles slightly. The military has made her more reserved, he notices. Her eyes no longer tell exactly what she’s feeling, her laughter is restrained. A unnecessary evil, if she’s ever to have any respect from her crew. But he’ll miss it all the same.
“I’ll keep that in mind,” she says.
*
The door opens as they near the drop point. She gets her first look at Eden Prime. Instead of the serene beauty that’s always in the vids, she sees nothing but fire and destruction. Her stomach turns. It reminds her of Mindoir on the day she left.
“Nihlus, you coming with us?” Jenkins asks.
“I move faster on my own!” Nihlus shouts back.
“Like hell you do,” Shepard says, surprising Kaidan and Jenkins both. “I’ll take point with Nihlus; Alenko, you and Jenkins rendezvous with us at the beacon. You understand?”
“Yes, Commander!”
Nihlus looks at her. Then, with a slight nod of understanding, they jump together.
*
They reach the docks and kneel behind some crates. There’s movement- more geth, probably. He makes a motion to Shepard, and they move at the same time. But both of them quickly lower their guns.
“Saren?” he says, shocked. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Shepard curl one of her hands into a fist.
He looks…different. Wrong. There are tubes and metal and his arm- what happened to him? A mission gone wrong, perhaps? Nihlus hasn’t seen him in a couple years now; his mentor seemed to be constantly busy these days. With what, Nihlus has no idea.
“Nihlus. Jane.” Saren says, looking towards them. His eyes lock briefly on Jane, and Nihlus steps forward before they can start arguing.
“This isn’t your mission, Saren. What are you doing here?” he asks.
Saren walks forward and sets a hand on his shoulder. A familiar gesture. It sets Nihlus at ease, somewhat. “The Council thought you could use some help on this one. And I was curious to see how the new Commander would do under pressure.”
Once again, he steps between them. He turns to look at Jane, trying to convey with his eyes that he would have warned her if he knew Saren was going to turn up. The two don’t exactly see eye-to-eye, and this isn’t the best time for awkward reunions. “I wasn’t expecting the geth. The situation is bad.”
“Don’t worry,” Saren says behind him. “I’ve got it all under control-”
“NIHLUS!” Shepard screams.
There’s a shot, pain, and then the world goes black.
*
Shepard stares at Nihlus, now lying crumpled on the ground. She’d grabbed Saren’s arm, tried to redirect the shot, but he was still hit. He was down, he might be dead, dear God-
Saren hits her, knocking her to the ground on top of Nihlus.
“Have you gone insane?!” Jane yells. There’s blue blood pooling around her.
He doesn’t answer. He points his gun at her, and for a moment she thinks he’s going to fire. Then, instead, he hits her with the butt of his gun. Shepard slumps back against Nihlus, and her last thought is of words left unspoken and things left undone.
*
Nihlus wakes up in a hospital, with more tubes and needles sticking into him than he believed possible. He tries to remember what happened, what he did to get in here…the last thing he can recall is Saren. Saren and- no, no that can’t be right. Saren wouldn’t shoot him. Why would he?
He lays there for a time, waiting for someone to walk in and explain what happened. He expects a nurse; instead, he gets Jane.
She looks tired, so…confused. When she sees that he’s awake, she freezes. “Nihlus?”
“I think I made a tactical error somewhere on Eden Prime,” he says.
Jane rushes to his side, sitting on the edge of his bed. “Thank God you’re awake. I thought- the doctors weren’t sure if you’d make it. How do you feel? What do you remember?”
“I remember running into Saren on Eden Prime,” he says. “And…that’s it. What happened? Geth sniper?”
Jane shakes her head. “Saren.”
“…Saren shot me?”
“Yes. I got off easy. He only gave me a slight concussion,” she says. “When Alenko and Williams found us-”
“-Willians?”
“A survivor. They found us, woke me up. Called for an evac for you. We went after the beacon. It was…destroyed. Kaidan activated it somehow and I got caught in it and-” Jane takes a deep breath, forcing herself to slow down. “It’s been a very confusing week, Nihlus.”
He frowns. “But why would Saren try to kill me? Why would he hurt you? He’s ruthless, but not…”
“Evil?” she ventures. “There’s something wrong with him. He’s working with the geth, and an asari called Matriarch Benezia.”
“That- that just doesn’t sound like him,” Nihlus says, frowning. Saren, going rogue? It doesn’t make any sense. He knows him; and while he can be stern (to put it mildly), he’s not a bad person. He does what he thinks he has to in order to get the job done and keep as many people safe as possible. But this? This is madness. He sighs. “This is…a lot to take in.”
“That’s only half of it,” Jane says, sighing. “The Council wants me to hunt him down.”
“The Council wants YOU to hunt him down?” Nihlus repeats. “But you’re Alliance-”
She smiles. “Actually, you’re looking at the first human Spectre.”
Nihlus’s mandibles flare. He knew it. He knew she had it in her. Hopefully the Council still wants him to mentor her. Perhaps he’ll even join her on her hunt once he’s fully recovered. Saren owes him some answers. But, for now, Nihlus doesn’t think about that. Instead, he sets his hand over Jane’s. “Welcome to the club.”