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It had felt like so long ago – yet as if no time had passed at all.
Though eons had passed - entire lifetimes from then and now – the light of his creations shone brighter than he remembered.
Never failing to cut through the darkest of nights… light up the largest of views.
Far away from the distractions of the city, he found himself looking up at the stars.
Longing for the times before.
Before.
Before he Fell.
When he was still the Lightbringer.
He would never give up his freedom to go back to those times – but he couldn’t help the part of him that longed for those days, the days which were fond.
When he was naïve. When his siblings cared for him as much as they cared for each other. When his Father was still someone he could look up to.
But he was the Lightbringer no more. No longer was he Samael – and he never could be again.
Samael had been innocent. Pure. Good. And he would only be lying to himself if he thought he could be that now.
After everything. After what he’d done. After what he’d gone through.
Yet he couldn’t help but feeling he was not whole. Ever since he Fell, there was a piece of him missing.
Something he couldn’t describe – couldn’t place. But he still knew.
He glanced down to the waves rippling at his feet. Here he was, grounded, when he had once been free among his creations.
One day, so long ago, he had looked down on Earth from the Heavens, whole and full of light.
Today, he looked up from Earth to the Heavens, lost and broken.
He missed the light which once filled his being.
The light and the flames which he had once had under his command.
The invigorated rush he had felt – a feeling truly unlike any other.
He hadn’t felt like that way since. Not until he looked into her eyes.
And again, there he was – the Lightbringer he used to go by.
In her, he had found a home – a place he belonged like he had never before.
Something he didn’t even know he was searching for.
Something he found when he himself was lost.
She saw the good in him that he was sure had been long gone.
She didn’t see the monster he believed himself to be. Never had. Never will.
A part of him had always been drawn to her in a way he couldn’t explain.
It started out as curiosity.
Then confusion, as she made him feel a way he never had before.
And all it would take was a glance. Or a smile directed at him. Or her laugh.
Eventually he recognized the feeling.
When he was with her, he felt whole.
When he was left feeling empty and alone – there she was.
He had been the Lightbringer once.
But now it was her who was bringing light into his life.
Her compassion. Her acceptance. Her love.
He wasn’t worthy of it – that he knew.
But, he hoped he could be one day.
Hoped he could be the man she saw when she looked at him.
The man worthy of someone so breathtakingly beautiful – in every sense of the word.
The man that could give her the universe like she had given him.
The thought of her flooded him with warmth.
The happiness she brought him was indescribable. Overwhelming.
Incomparable to anything he had ever experienced.
The feeling crashed over him, greater than any divinity he had felt so long ago.
It began with a tingling sensation in his hand – so familiar yet so new.
He looked down and raised his palm towards the sky.
He felt it more than saw it – but there was no denying it.
A flicker of flame danced across his palm.
He kept his eye on his palm and he beheld what he thought no longer possible.
It had been eons, yet the feeling had never been easier.
Watching the flame grow in both intensity and luminescence, he realized how much he missed the control.
Light and flame had always been his to call upon.
And it appeared that they still were.
He glanced up towards his stars, a smile slowly drifting across his face.
Perhaps it had not been that long ago.
Perhaps he wasn’t as far as he believed himself to be.
Perhaps the Lightbringer was not gone after all.
One day, so long ago, he had looked down on Earth from the Heavens, whole and full of light.
Today, he looked up from Earth to the Heavens, brighter than before.