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Dean stared unyielding at the tether, silently begging it to move or flash, hell it could give a little dance for all he cared, as long as he saw progress. It was already an hour past the time Jack planned to be back from his solo-adventure into The Empty, and there was still no sign of him. All they had was the quiet hum of magic from within the tether and the pointed crackling of the wind as it plucked crisp autumn leaves from their branches and sent them spinning. Dean tried not to take it as a sign that they kept smacking him in the face.
“Dean, maybe…maybe there were complications, maybe it’s time we consider pulling him back?”
“Stop. He’s got this, the plan is gonna work. Then you, me, Cas, and Jack are gonna go home and figure out how to take Chuck down together. Team Free Will 2.0, back in action.” Dean had hated letting Jack go in alone. If anything, saving Cas was his responsibility, but even with all their research, they couldn’t find a way for Jack to bring him along. So, the kid went in alone- prepared to find Cas, bomb the shit out of The Empty, and use the tether to guide them both home. It was a long shot, but it was all they had.
“I’m not saying it won’t, what I’m saying is, we don’t even know how big The Empty is or how Jack is even going to find Cas. Who knows how long it could take and with everything else going on…all I’m saying is, we built the recall tool for a reason, Dean. Jack isn’t here. He could be in danger and we have no way of knowing. We should pull him back through the tether, focus on Chuck, and then, once we’re safe we can try this again as many times as it takes, but right now, the war can’t wait. I know…how hard this is, but you know I’m right.”
Dean looked at his brother in disbelief, then rustled his keys from his pocket and tossed them at Sam with a little more force than was necessary, “Go on then. I’m staying here however long it takes, I don’t care. I’m staying here until he brings Cas home. You wanna go play battle commander, get the troops ready? Go do it.”
“Dean,” Sam started softly, but stopped short. Dean may not have opened up about it, but Sam knew how he felt. He was going through the exact same thing, after all. If they knew where Eileen and the others had gone, he wouldn’t have stopped at anything to storm the place and get her back. At least they knew where Cas was. Sam pushed the flare of bitter anger down and started again, gently, “Dean, it’s gonna be ok. Cas always comes back.”
Dean nodded briskly, unable to really say anything as his heart fought between hope and fear. They fell into a heavy silence: their shared grief and frustration weighing heavy on their shoulders. Neither had gotten a full night’s sleep in weeks, and it was catching up with them.
Then, he heard a spark, a pulse. Dean looked back at the tether and saw magic ripple around it like lightning, building until it was a nebulous torrent with massive waves spreading out around them and covering the entire field. The magic pricked at Dean’s skin like static electricity making his hair stand on end. He looked over at Sam with a hopeful desperation, this had to be it. Right? This meant Jack found Cas. That they escaped The Empty. It had to be, right?
Suddenly a figure appeared in the tall grass nearby, then another and another, everywhere, all through the field, people appeared groaning and dazed, lifting their heads in confusion.
“What the….JACK?! CAS?!” Dean shouted, stomping through the field. There were so many unrecognizable faces, he glanced them over one after another, until it was a blur. Somewhere behind him, he heard Sam shouting, but he couldn’t turn around until he heard one word so filled with joy, love, and relief that it sliced through his building fear and stopped him in his tracks: “EILEEN!” Behind him, among the hundreds of figures stumbling to their feet, was Sam swooping up his beloved in his arms.
“What?” He was happy for him. He really was. But a sudden selfish, panic and fury pervaded through him until he was shaking. “JACK!” Dean shouted so loud it echoed through the valley.
“I’m here, Dean!” Jack ran over to him, a wide, bright smile plastered on his face. “The Empty was so different than we thought. It wasn’t just some afterlife for angels, it was more like a refugee camp.”
Dean could barely wrap his head around anything Jack was telling him, “Where’s Cas?”
“He should be here somewhere. I couldn’t actually find him because there were so many angels and they were all buried in this sort of living darkness-“
“You didn’t find him?! Are you fucking kidding me? This entire plan revolved around getting him out of there!”
“I know, I did! I mean, I got everyone out of there. The angels and all the lost souls, they’re all free!” Dean’s brow knit together, and Jack continued, “All the people from the alternate worlds, their entire universes, their heavens and hells were gone too. I found out that the empty is where souls go when they get lost. All those people didn’t belong in our hell or heaven, so they ended up there. As for the angels…they weren’t exactly meant to die. No wonder they didn’t have a proper afterlife ready and waiting for them.”
“So, you brought…wow,” Dean let out a haggard breath and looked around him, and suddenly he saw a few faces he recognized. Hunters he’d seen in the bunker, and even a few angels he'd worked with. Hannah was at work helping others and Gabriel already had a beautiful woman under each arm. “Looks like you might have just got us an army, kid. No way they won’t want a little pay back when they hear where God's been. Hell, they might even be able to put heaven back together when this is all over too. Good work.”
Jack beamed proudly, then his gaze shifted to somewhere in the distance, his eyes going wide, “Dad!” he ran past Dean and pulled Cas into his arms. “I missed you!”
Cas smiled and hugged him back, stroking his hair, “I missed you too.”
Dean stared at them, frozen. Cas was really here. Safe. He could finally breath again.
Once he finally settled, Dean cleared his throat and Jack looked back at him with a knowing grin, “Oh, right, I uh, think I’ll go meet some of my new aunts and uncles!”
“Go look for an angel named Samandriel, I think you would get along well. Oh, and stay away from Balthazar and Gabriel,” Cas advised sternly. Dean chucked at the image of Balthazar and Gabriel trying to corrupt the boy, and poor Jack’s innocent face as he would unknowingly let it happen.
“Ok, see you later,” Jack gave an awkward wave and headed out in the crowd.
Once Jack was gone, Castiel turned back to Dean almost hesitantly.
“I take it this was all your doing?” Cas started casually, taking a few steps forward until he was standing in front of Dean, just within arm’s reach, yet somehow still worlds away.
Dean huffed, “Couldn’t just let you leave like that. Not after what you said…” It was time. He had tried once before, but Cas stopped him. Dammit if he didn’t feel grateful for it at the time, but now? He had to say it. His truth. Just like Cas did. He could do this.
Fuck, but how the hell did he even start? There was too much to say. Too much he felt. But if Cas really loved him back, then, it would be ok if he sorta stumbled through it, right? Cas deserved to hear it. All of it. Even if it came out a mess. At least, it would be an honest mess. He steeled himself as if going into battle, “Cas-“
“It’s alright Dean. I know.”
“You do?”
Castiel nodded, hesitant, careful, smiling with all the damn grace of a saint, “I know you don’t feel the same about me. It’s alright. We can still just be friends like always, if…you’re comfortable with that.” His gaze fell away, and Dean felt the loss of it like he had been kicked in the chest.
“What? No!”
“Oh, I-“
They really were a couple of dumbasses. All these years he wasted thinking he didn’t deserve Cas while Cas was sitting there thinking Dean would never want him. Idiots.
“Dammit, Cas, that’s not what I meant, just, shut up and listen to me for a minute.”
Cas finally looked back at him and suddenly it was too much. Dean took a breath and turned away. “Cas, every time I lose you…everything just…stops. It’s like, I go through the paces, but none if really...matters.”
“Dean?”
Dean held up a finger, urging him to wait as he started over, “You said I helped you love the world… the truth is Cas…you did the same for me. You’re what made me believe, Cas. I don’t mean in angels or heaven, I mean…in good.” He finally looked back at Cas, “Before you, it was just dad, Sam and me up against the world. A whole world full of evil and monsters just ready to take or destroy everything. That’s all there was. That’s all I saw.” He felt a tear slide down his cheek, “Then, you pulled my ass out of hell and showed me that there was good too. That things could get better. That we could all choose to be better. That there was good that…always came back and always kept trying. We’ve both…made mistakes, but even when I’m angry at you, when you’re here…beside me…I know things are gonna be ok. That we’ll win. And that belief is all because of you. You changed me too, Cas.”
Cas listened quietly, and when Dean paused, he gave the smallest hint of a smile and moved forward, lifting his hand to Dean’s shoulder, but that wall was still there. His words hadn’t been enough. He couldn’t tip toe. He had to throw himself in. Dean bit his lip and moved his head forward until his forehead bumped into Cas’.
“I love you, Cas. Stop dying on me, will ya?”
Cas laughed at that, their noses brushing, and Dean’s heart felt light, “I’ll try.”
Dean tilted his head and leaned in for a gentle kiss, bringing his hand up to Cas’ shoulder to pull him closer when suddenly he realized Cas had gone still and rigid. That wasn’t right. Had he read it all wrong? Isn’t this what Cas meant when he said he loved him? Fuck. What had he done?! Dean quickly moved away and searched the angel’s eyes, darting back and forth between them for answers. Shit, shit, shit, shit!
Cas tilted his head, “Dean, does this mean….?”
“I thought so?! Did you not mean…? Fuck, I…am never gonna live this down. Can you just…mind wipe everyone here including the both of us because-“
Cas pulled Dean into another, more passionate kiss. The kind he learned from the pizza man, apparently.
Nearby, Sam took a picture of them with his phone.
Beside him, Eileen leaned her head against his shoulder and signed, finally.
Sam snickered and kissed the top of her head before sending the photo off to the #Family group chat with the message: “Who had November 2020?”
Almost immediately, Claire responded: “I DID!”