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Epel isn’t exactly sure how to process how he was feeling over the past few weeks, or better yet if he can even accept it.
It didn’t start out this complicated. At first, he was sure he simply admired Jack as someone who is masculine and strong, a role model of sorts, and he was completely fine with that. However, recently he had caught himself staring at the taller boy in class more times than he’d like to admit, marveling at the way his ears flicked and his expression narrowed when he was particularly focused on the lesson.
He tried telling himself that all this came with looking up to Jack as a sportsman and classmate, but compared to how he felt about his other friends, there was no denying that Jack was a bit special to him.
With that being said, you can imagine Epel’s absolute horror when Jack overheard him saying that he was struggling with studying for the upcoming test, and the ever enthusiastic Jack eagerly inviting Epel to study with him. Together. O ne on one.
It’s just a study date, no, not even a date, just two friends studying together so there was no problem, right? Epel felt his face heat up as he made his way to the library, taking calming breaths. How is he going to be able to last two hours? What if he embarrasses himself?
He gripped his textbook (that he very nearly forgot) as he stood outside the library doors. He closed his eyes for a moment, whispering reassurances to himself. Come on, you’re meant to be stronger than this, it’s just an ordinary study session, just go in there and-
“Epel?”
Epel nearly screamed when he was snapped out of his thoughts and spun around, eyes wide. If it were anyone else standing in front of him he probably would’ve brashly scolded them, but he nearly died when he met the golden eyes of a very confused Jack.
“J-Jack kun!! You scared me…”
“Ah, sorry...did you just arrive..?
“Yeah, uh...l-let’s just go inside.” Epel swiftly turned around, hiding the furious blush growing on his face. He could only imagine how psychopathic he looked talking to himself in the middle of a hallway. Jack just stared in bewilderment as Epel viciously pushed the doors open, nearly taking out some students on the other side.
Luckily the library wasn’t busy on that particular day, a few groups of students dotted around the place. Epel scanned the room for a suitable area, and found a comfortable spot at the end right next to the window and sat down, sinking into the soft fabric of the couch. Jack sat directly opposite him, which unfortunately for Epel, meant that he had no choice but to look at him and couldn’t hide his already flushed face.
The pair began taking out their things and opening their textbooks in silence. Epel wasn’t sure if he should break the silence or stay quiet, they were here to study, after all. Thankfully, Jack made the decision for him.
“How’s Vil-san?” Jack attempted to initiate some small talk.
Epel huffed, slightly annoyed at the taller boy’s decision to bring up him, of all people. He tried remaining as calm as possible, suppressing that twinge of jealousy that was building in his stomach.
“If you’re asking if he’s still pestering everyone about every little thing and detail and forcing manners an’ flowery junk down folks’ throats, then sure I’d say he’s doin’ just fine an’ dandy-Ah!” Epel covered his mouth quickly, not realising he had slipped into his accent.
Jack smiled softly, choosing not to bring it up. “He’s not all bad. He just has high expectations for others. He’s always been that way, even when we were kids. I really really admire his dedicat-”
Epel coughed rather aggressively and shot Jack a passive but threatening glare. Jack backed down, slightly afraid of how terrifying the smaller boy could be.
Epel sighed, slouching into his seat more. Vil did indeed have a softer spot for Jack, probably because of their connection from childhood. Still, Epel couldn’t help feel jealous. Why did he get to run with Jack every morning? There were times when, on the rare occasion Epel had the confidence to talk to Jack, Vil would whisk the wolf right away from him to discuss a new training plan or something.
As silence fell on the pair once again, Epel finally turned his attention to the textbook in front of him. He flicked through the pages, occasionally glancing up at Jack, who had that same focused expression when he was trying to understand something in class, absorbed in taking notes.
Epel decided to copy what Jack was doing and took out his own notebook. He looked at the jumbled mess of notes he had taken earlier in class and sighed. Not even he could read them. He flipped to a new page and tried to take the notes again, in an actually cohesive way this time.
He studied the text book for a few moments, actually trying to understand what was going on so he could take proper notes, but none of it made sense. He never cared for math, but why the hell did they start throwing in letters into the subject too? Epel growled in frustration, firmly closing his notebook and holding his head in his hands. There was no way he was going to pass.
“...Are you okay?”
Epel slowly looked up at Jack, who had stopped what he was doing, the taller boy giving him a sympathetic smile that could melt Epel right then and there. He’s so cute.
“Ugh...I’ll be fine. I just don’t understand any of this.” Epel gestured towards the textbook that lay hopelessly in front of him. Jack leaned in slightly, tilting his head to look at what Epel was trying to study. He could literally just lean in and kiss him if he wanted to. (spoiler alert, he wants to.)
“Ah, I actually had a look at this last night. I could try and explain it to you, if you want.” Jack suggested.
Epel shrugged lightly, sitting up straight again. “It’s worth a try, I guess.” He gave Jack a weak smile.
“Okay, so--Actually, it would be easier if I sat beside you so I can show you my notes…”
Epel froze. Oh god. Before he could even protest, Jack was on his feet, moving his stuff to Epel’s side of the table. No. No. No. Don’t come near me. Against Epel’s futile prayers, Jack slid in beside the petit boy, his very presence almost suffocating him.
Jack had begun to explain but, in all honesty, any hope for Epel being able to focus was thrown out the window. Epel was too aware of the warmth radiating from Jack, of every time his shoulder brushed against his own when he leaned closer to point out something in Epel’s book, and the faint, sweet smell of pears he managed to catch every so often. Epel could do nothing but sit and nod along, hoping that Jack would finish soon.
“...and then you put it into this formula to get your answer. Got it?”
Epel let out a breath, mainly of relief. “T-Thanks, Jack-kun. I understand it now.”
Jack nodded and moved back over to the other side of the table, Epel missing his warmth already. He felt silly letting a stupid little crush interfere with his life so much. Sometimes, he wished he could just tell him and get this unbearable torment over with. He knew he didn’t stand a chance, though. Jack was manly, strong and intelligent, and Epel really wasn’t.
“Hey, Jack-kun?”
“Yeah?”
Oh God. What was he doing?
“What would you do if you had feelings for a friend?”
Yikes. Yikes. Epel couldn’t even stop the words coming from his mouth and he instantly regretted it. He wished the earth would open up and reclaim him, swallowing him hole so he could escape this awful situation he just put himself in.
Jack was obviously quite surprised by Epel’s words too, looking out the window to avoid eye contact.
“Ah...I’m not great with, um…*ahem*, personal stuff like that, so...I don’t think I’m the right person to ask, if you want an honest answer…”
Epel looked at the taller boy, who had started to fidget with his pen, still not looking back at him. He had never seen Jack this way before, whose usual cool demeanor had turned into a nervous one.
“Please, Jack-kun?” Epel pushed his luck a little farther.
“Well…” Jack started slowly, thinking about his words, “I can’t lie, I’d probably bottle it up for a while and try to suppress it, but...I think if I really trusted my friend, I’d have to tell them, eventually....”
Epel leaned back, accepting the other’s answer. There was another long break of silence, as Epel desperately tried to pump himself up to say something else, anything. Just as he was about to open his mouth, Jack filled in the silence first.
“Epel?”
“Y-Yes?”
“Are you asking me this because you’re in this kind of situation?”
“........yeah.”
Epel’s heart was practically beating out of his chest. Did Jack already know about his silly little crush on him? The thoughts of it made him want to die.
Jack looked deep in thought, almost like he was thinking over his words very carefully, searching out the window for an answer. Epel looked at him intensely, wondering if he was going to break the silence.
“Epel, I....I think you should just tell him. He’s an honest guy, so even if he doesn’t feel the same way, I don’t think that’ll change anything between you two…”
Epel’s brow furrowed. What?
“Jack-kun, who do you think I’m talking about?”
“D-Deuce? Who else?”
“Wh-Deuce-kun!? No way! I-I mean he’s great and all, but I’m pretty sure he’s already in love with Ace…”
“H-huh? Him and Ace are...Wait, who is it then?”
Epel deadpanned. Was he that oblivious? He might be that oblivious.
“Oh my God, Jack-- IT’S YOU, DAMNIT!” he practically shouted, standing up.
“Hush, hush! Might I remind you that this is a library?” The headmaster somehow teleporting in front of the two, wearing that kind yet threatening smile as always.
“A-Ah, sorry, Headmaster...Sir.” Epel shrank back down into his seat, feeling embarrassed.
Crowley, his expression not faltering, left as quick as he arrived. Epel let out a sigh of relief. He finally said it. He sheepishly peeked at Jack through his eyelashes, the other boy stunned into silence, covering his quickly reddening face and looking out the window as a means of escape. Maybe it was a mistake to tell him after all. Epel grunted, and seriously considered just leaving and hiding in his room for a few days.
“...I’m just gonna go, I think-” Epel began to gather his things up promptly, before he was suddenly stopped.
“N-No!! I mean...no, please stay.” Jack grabbed Epel’s hand to stop him, finally looking him in the eyes, gold meeting blue. Epel slowly sat back down.
“...Ah!” Jack quickly retracted his hand, not realising he still had a firm hold on the petit boy’s hand. He awkwardly placed his hands on the table, then in his pockets, then crossed them back on the table.
“Epel....did you really mean it? That you...uh...you know…” Jack flushed, getting flustered at the mere thoughts of it.
“Y-Yes, I….I really like you, Jack-kun...I don’t expect you to return my feelings, but…” Epel looked down, embarrassed that he even thought he might have a chance with Jack.
“N-No, I...I don’t even know how to say it…” Jack fumbled, clearing his throat. “...I also...I also feel that way. Towards you. I...you’re the only one that’s made me feel like this…”
“Wait, really!?” Epel’s eyes lit up, half in disbelief. “You really mean it!?”
“Y-Yeah...I’m not good at talking about...mushy stuff like that, but I’m sure of it. I.. like you, Epel.”
Epel couldn’t stop the wide grin spreading across his face. He was truly happy. Never in a million years did he think a day like this would come.
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner!?”
“I don’t know, I...I was scared. I should’ve taken my own advice, huh?” The taller boy smiled softly at Epel, a smile that almost turned him into mush.
The two fell into silence for a brief moment, Jack deep in thought. Epel looked at him quizzically, suddenly worried that he might be rethinking his decision.
“W-What’s wrong?”
“Um....what happens now? Jack said, exasperated.
Epel laughed softly. He really was hopeless. This was gonna take a while. He quickly scanned the library, concluding that it was empty enough that no one would notice them.
“This.” Epel leaned over the table and placed a short, chaste kiss on the other boy’s lips. He leaned back, satisfied with the flustered mess he left spellbound in front of him.
“Ah—you—wh?” Jack managed to stutter out. Epel laughed when he saw Jack’s tail wag furiously behind him, and at the wolf’s futile attempts to stop it. He was adorable.
“So, uh...there goes our plans for the test tomorrow…” Jack sheepishly pointed out.
Epel blanked, looking down at his still empty notebook.
Oh shit.