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“Ezra? No!” Kanan yelled as he realized what was happening. It was too late. Ezra had given in to his instincts, had tapped into the well of the Force that he didn’t know how to use.
Kanan was forced to watch as Ezra summoned the beast. As he was overwhelmed by his own powers. As he collapsed.
When he could get his feet under himself again, he ran over to Ezra, who was lying still on the ground. Too still.
“Ezra.” He picked up his young apprentice and shook him lightly, willing him to come back to himself.
“Kanan?” Ezra mumbled, barely opening his eyes. “What happened? I-I feel so cold.” He closed his eyes again.
“I know. It’s okay. We’re leaving.” Kanan picked up Ezra and hauled him over his shoulder. He needed to keep his hands free in case he needed to defend himself against the monster that was currently preoccupied with the Inquisitor. He also wouldn’t have put it past the Inquisitor to try one more attack on him and Ezra, even though it might have left himself open to an attack by the creature.
He managed to use the Force to retrieve his lightsaber from where it had rolled when the Inquisitor dropped it during his fight with the creature.
Just as they were just about to get into the Phantom, the creature retreated and the Inquisitor whirled his lightsaber at the two rebels. Kanan turned and used his own lightsaber to counter the attack, then jumped inside the Phantom before the Inquisitor could get another chance to attack them.
He set Ezra down carefully. The boy was still not alert, though he was mumbling something that Kanan couldn’t hear.
He didn’t have time to do more than jump into the pilot’s seat and perform an immediate take-off. He shot at the troopers that were still firing on the Phantom and made sure they were safely away from the base before taking a breath.
He turned on the Phantom’s autopilot to rendezvous with the Ghost and the rest of the crew and climbed out of the seat to check on Ezra.
The boy was still upright where Kanan had set him, swaying with the motion of the ship, but was otherwise motionless.
“Ezra?” Kanan shook his shoulder and got no response. He could see that Ezra was breathing, but that was a small relief. He reached out with the Force to see if he could sense any injuries in his young crew member.
Ezra seemed to be in perfect health, which was amazing considering what they had just been through. But he didn’t respond to anything Kanan did to wake him, except to occasionally shiver as if he were cold.
Kanan sighed. “I’m so sorry, Ezra.” He adjusted the bench so he could lay Ezra on it and secure him so he would be safe for the rest of the journey back to the Ghost. He put a thermal blanket over Ezra to try to help with the cold the boy was feeling.
After he got Ezra settled, Kanan thought about climbing back into the pilot’s seat. But he couldn’t leave Ezra. The kid looked so young, so vulnerable. And it was Kanan’s fault this happened. He hadn’t taught Ezra how to respond if the dark side of the Force beckoned.
He dreaded facing the rest of the crew and telling them what had happened. Ezra was his responsibility. His apprentice. He should have done more to protect him.
“Specter 2 to Specter 1. Come in Specter 1. Over.” Hera. Kanan couldn’t bring himself to answer the comm just yet. He knew, though, if he didn’t respond soon, it would worry the rest of the crew. When Hera hailed him a second time, he responded, telling the crew of the Ghost that he and Specter 6 were inbound. He hesitated a moment, then added, “Have Specter 6’s bunk ready for him.” He wasn’t sure when Ezra would recover, but he knew the problem wasn’t medical. All he could do for now was make sure the kid could be comfortable.
As soon as he disembarked from the Phantom carrying Ezra, the crew exploded with questions. He kept walking until he reached Ezra and Zeb’s room, paused, and then entered his own room instead. The kid could have his bed for now. He wasn’t going to sleep much anyway. He put Ezra on the bunk, covered him with a blanket, and left the room to face the crew.
He was surprised to find only Hera waiting for him. He had expected the others to have too many questions for him to answer. Instead, only Hera waited, and she asked nothing. Her eyes did all the talking.
“I-he...” Kanan started, and stopped. “He isn’t injured as far as I can tell. He...I didn’t teach him enough. He tapped into powers he couldn’t control. It’s my fault.” He hung his head, ashamed.
Hera moved in and embraced him. “You have taught him as best as you can for now,” she said.
“He was trying to protect me.”
“That’s what family does.”
“But I’m supposed to protect him.”
“We can’t always protect them all. He’ll be fine, love.”
“He...his powers are growing so quickly.” He pulled away and turned to look at Ezra, who was mumbling again.
“He has been through a lot. He has had to learn to survive. His instincts will protect him,” Hera said, putting her hand on his shoulder.
“But who will protect him from his instincts?” Kanan asked. He squeezed her hand and went back into the room. He didn’t want Ezra to be alone.
Hours later, Ezra began to stir.
“Kanan!” He tried to sit up, but collapsed back onto the bed.
“It’s okay, kid. We are back on the Ghost. We are going home.” Kanan put a hand on Ezra’s arm.
“I saved us?”
“Yes.”
“But, something doesn’t feel right.”
“You opened yourself to the Force but your will wasn’t strong enough yet. You became vulnerable to the dark side,” Kanan explained.
“Well, I was trying to protect you.”
“I know. But your anger and fear caused that creature to attack.”
“I don’t remember it.”
Kanan sighed. “That’s for the best.” He squeezed Ezra’s arm gently. “Your powers are growing so quickly, bayou weren’t prepared.” He looked away. “I didn’t teach you what you needed to know. I’m sorry.”
Ezra reached over and squeezed Kanan’s hand, which was still on his arm, and then turned on the bunk so his back was to Kanan.
Kanan sighed, squeezed Ezra’s arm once more, then dropped his hand from the boy’s arm.
The door opened behind him.
“Kanan, can you take over the cockpit for a bit? I want to talk to Ezra, if he is up to it,” Hera said quietly.
“Sure. Let me know if either of you needs anything.” He exited the room and closed the door behind him.
He knew it was going to be tough to take on a padawan, but he hadn’t expected this. He knew he needed to step up his game and be a better teacher. For all of their sakes.
