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Penelope was not making the face Simon was expecting from her.
It was a boring Sunday afternoon. They were sitting together on their couch, watching Disney movies and eating popcorn and candy and whatever else Simon wanted to eat. That Sunday felt like one of those days that would stretch forever. Like time was frozen. They started chatting to kill time, until they mentioned Baz and, suddenly, he was the star of the afternoon. Simon wouldn’t shut up about him. And that’s when Penny realized-
— Hey, you never told me how you guys got together. Like, details. I just know that you spent Christmas Break at the Pitch Manor and finally noticed your massive crush on him.
Simon knew exactly why he’d never told her this story. First, of course, it was because of all that went down on Christmas Day. He couldn’t focus on something like that after he lost his magic, and Ebb, and the Mage, and Watford…
But then he could. And he didn’t say a word about it to Pen.
Truth be told, it felt too intimate. Too... personal. He doubted Baz had mentioned anything to anyone about how everything with the vampires turned out, and he didn’t want to be the one that said that Baz tried to set himself on fire on Christmas Eve.
And he didn’t want to mention to anyone how they actually became boyfriends. It was such a vulnerable moment. For both of them, he’d guess. When he actually realized how he felt, when he came back for Baz, when he opened up to him about being a terrible boyfriend, and they shared that meal, and they were so close.
But… Penelope was family, right? And he was in a better place now, all of them were. It wouldn’t hurt to share some of the story.
So he did. Simon told her about how they went looking for vampires and found Nicodemus. How Baz looked and acted, how distressed he got. How he gave Baz his magic and wished for those green lights and then they were flying. He told her about when they stopped and Baz left and started lighting the trees on fire. How he’d cried, and refused to leave Baz’s side, refused to turn his back on him.
About how he kissed him, and kissed him, and kissed him. And everything made sense.
He told her about how then they put out the fire, and Baz fed, and they talked, and talked again, and kissed more.
By the end, it was sweet. He liked to remember how he and Baz could still do that. That now they could go back to doing things like that. Talking and cuddling and kissing. Being vulnerable around each other. Being soft with each other.
As Simon finished the story about their first (and second) kiss, he stopped babbling and actually looked at Penny.
He shouldn’t have done it.
She looked utterly disgusted. Terrified. Dumbfounded.
Something inside Simon broke.
— What is it?— he asked, shocked. Penelope tried to soften her expression.
Didn’t work so well.
Simon almost felt sick.
She cleared her throat.
— It’s nothing, Simon, really-
— Of course it’s bloody something, Pen! Look at the face you’re making!
She frowned a bit, like she hadn’t realized her own grossed out face.
— I just- I didn’t expect the story to go like this. It’s a bit…— she paused, trying to choose the word carefully.— It’s a bit upsetting.
— I mean, yeah, the context isn’t great, but the kiss-
— No, Simon.— she interrupted, but it looked like she didn’t mean to. Pen sighed, and started speaking again.— The kiss itself. It… I get to you why it might seem romantic or- I don’t know. But- By Morgana, Simon, Baz was trying to set himself on fire! And the forest- You two were shaking, crying, panicking-
Yeah, Simon was definitely feeling a tad sick. Penelope kept talking.
— You just- You don’t kiss a person in situations like these! And especially not out of nowhere, without any consent, while they’re trying to get you to go away because they want to- To… — she cleared her throat.— To kill themselves! Merlin, it’s just- so irresponsible! I know you’re impulsive, but- Aleister Crowley, Simon, I would've punched you so hard in the face if I were Baz. I’d probably have a fucking breakdown. A panic attack or something. But I guess Baz was already like that. Gods. And- Simon, does anyone else even know about everything that went down? With the vampires, what happened in the woods- Did you just kiss his suicidal thoughts away and decided to never think about it again?
It wasn’t like Penny to not make any eye contact during a lecture like this.
— I never thought about it that way.— Simon murmured.— I don’t think Baz has, either. He said… He wanted to kiss me, too. Kiss me, send me flying, then...— Simon’s voice dies in his throat, and his expression hardens.— Then go, I guess.
— I’ll never get you two. You really were made for each other, you disturbed sickos.— Penny tried to joke to lighten the mood. She still looked tense, but her features had actually softened a little. Simon took that as a good sign.
— Christ, Pen.
She gave him an apologetic smile.
— Just think about it later.— she squeezed his shoulder.— For now, go on. I doubt- I mean, I hope the story of how you two officially became boyfriends isn’t as problematic as this one.
— I guess I wouldn’t know.— Simon scoffed.— But, yeah. It’s actually sweet.