Cosmicalart



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  1. Rec *

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    Summary

    Turns out I'm better at giving my evil roommate a blowie than I am at holding the interest of the most perfect girl in school. Which, honestly, is a bit vindicating. Come at me, prophesies: you can't pull this disaster back from the brink.


    Simon Snow has lived through seven years of trials and tribulations.

    His eighth year is going to be a little bit different.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,193
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    168
    Kudos:
    464
    Bookmarks:
    108
    Hits:
    7,200

    08 Jan 2026

  2. Rec 53

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    Lady Salisbury is the founder and CEO of Ruth’s Kitchen, a high-end baking and cookware company that, following 40 years of being a boutique line in the UK has exploded on the international market following a marketing deal with the Great British Bake Off.
    Lady Salisbury, too busy to do her own shopping now and suddenly finding herself on breakfast tv and daytime talk shows across the UK, Europe and North America has hired a personal stylist and shopper, Basilton Pitch.
    Enter her troubled grandson Simon.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    131,935
    Chapters:
    28/28
    Comments:
    533
    Kudos:
    294
    Bookmarks:
    53
    Hits:
    9,386

    04 Jan 2026

  3. Rec 62

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    “Dare,” Baz says, like it’s an annoying chore he’s being nagged to undertake.  His mouth twitches and his neck cranes, as if he was going to roll his eyes then changed his mind suddenly.  Simon grips the knees of his jeans, effectively further shredding the shreds already there.  He sees Penny give him a sympathetic (but also probably relieved) look out of the corner of his eye.

    Henriette smiles.  A real smile, not the smarmy smirks she’s been wearing this whole night.  Simon suddenly wishes she’d go back to using the smirk, because her real smile looks unfathomably evil.  “I dare you to find the person in this room you think is the most beautiful, and give them a kiss.”

    “Fuck me,’  Simon mutters.  He’s going to choose Agatha.  He’s going to choose Agatha, kiss her, and any chance he had of getting his girlfriend back will go up in flames like the flames Simon wishes he could set to Baz’s body.

    ---

    During a strenuous game of truth or dare, Baz is dared to kiss the one he deems the most beautiful. If he does, everyone will know his most dire secret. If he doesn't? An eternity of bad luck enough to make him wish he were dead.

    Death suddenly doesn't look so bad.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,051
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    44
    Kudos:
    455
    Bookmarks:
    62
    Hits:
    3,187

    27 Dec 2025

  4. Rec 37

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    Simon Snow was conscripted to join the Mage's army at the age of 11 to fight the dark creatures that had suddenly appeared throughout the realm. Now at the age of 18, he is referred to as the Golden Knight, and is expected to fulfill various prophecies that foretell he will bring an end to this war.

    Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch left the army a year and a half ago when his father died, allowing him to take over his father's title as a duke. But unbeknownst to the outside world, Baz and the inhabitants of his castle have been trapped under a curse since his arrival at the castle. So far, they've tried in vain to break the curse, or slow its spread.

    When Simon discovers one day that no one at the Mage's fortress seems to remember his old roommate Baz, he sets out to find out what happened to him. Will Simon be able to find Baz and help break the curse?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    49,509
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Comments:
    160
    Kudos:
    153
    Bookmarks:
    37
    Hits:
    3,455

    19 Dec 2025

  5. Rec 25

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    At the end of seventh year, Simon Snow catches Baz in the woods with Agatha and can't stop himself from tackling him to the ground.

    Unfortunately, the Humdrum chose that exact moment to pull Simon away from Watford and into a dead wood. Doubly unfortunately, the Humdrum decides its better to keep Simon in a tower where he can't cast any magic. And just to top off an amazingly shitty cake, Baz has been dragged along with him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,917
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    126
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    1,383

    14 Dec 2025