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Most Dangerous Game

Summary:

Reeling from a failed mission, Phantom Thief Kokichi plays it safe and takes easier jobs, frustrating his partner Himiko. Detective Shuichi and his assistant are desperate to catch Kokichi but struggle to find any clues. Their paths cross when a new group of thieves target the very artifact Kokichi had tried and failed to steal.

An oumeno Phantom Thief AU!

Written for oumeno week 2020 Phantom Thief prompt

Notes:

I just loooove the Phantom Thief AU and it's very sad there is a lack of Oumeno PT fics and art. So here's my take on it! Enjoy!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Trench coat flapping, Shuichi ran down the city street, jostling people’s shoulders. Police sirens wailed in the distance. Jaw clenched, Shuichi gripped the brim of his Deerstalker hat. I know it’s the Phantom Thief, Dark Magician, and their crew! It has to be. “This time you won’t get away…!”

“Shuichi!” Kaede, his assistant, chased after the detective. “Hurry! We’re almost there!”

Shuichi glanced ahead. Between the people of the fleeing crowd, Shuichi glimpsed the steps leading up to the city bank. Shuichi pushed his way through the crowd. Raced up the stairs and burst through the doors. He gasped.

The tellers behind the registers had collapsed. People slumped across benches and lay on the floor of cubicle offices – all unconscious. Shuichi covered his mouth and nose with his arm. “Watch out, Kaede! There’s sleeping gas in the air!”

“H-huh? Nn…” Eyes fluttering closed, Kaede fell to the floor.

Shuichi grimaced. He scanned the area. What do I do? There’s no trace of them– “Urk!”

Someone crushed Shuichi’s neck in a choke hold. A deep voice whispered in his ear. The man’s warm breath sent shivers down Shuichi’s spine. “Better luck next time, Mister Detective. Nee-heehee!”

“You–!”

The man stabbed a syringe needle in Shuichi’s neck. Shuichi’s vision went blurry. The world went dark.


Sighing, Shuichi sat at a table in an outdoor seating area next to a food truck. Customers sat at the small array of picnic and circular tables, keeping their chatter to a minimum. Across the street, people walked past in ratty clothes. Heads down and shoulders hunched. Dirt caked the white siding of the houses. Litter blew in the breeze. Shuichi’s brows furrowed. I wouldn’t be surprised if the phantom thief’s hideout is around here…

“Hey.” Kaede reached across the table to cover Shuichi’s hand with hers. The detective jumped. Kaede wore a pink dress with scalloped tiers down the one side and a large purple bow over her chest. The sunlight set Kaede’s blond hair shining like a halo around her head. Ivory skin glowed. Smiling, Kaede pointed to the place between her eyebrows. “You have that look on your face again. Relax.”

Flushing, Shuichi hid his face by sipping his coffee. “Ah, sorry… Thanks.”

“Hey, guys! Sorry, just got my order.” Kaito, dressed in a police officer’s uniform, held a plate of yakisoba. Shuichi had been friends with Kaito for several years, since they collaborated to find a millionaire’s stolen inheritance. Sitting down, Kaito ate his noodles. “It’s good to see you two still at it solving mysteries. How long have you been working together now?”

Shuichi glanced at his partner. “Nearing a year now. Ever since that criminal sabotaged one of her piano recital competitions.” Shuichi, a freelance private detective, was called to determine the culprit behind whoever stole the cash prize for the winner and cut all the pianos’ strings. Kaede, a competitor, assisted his investigation, but the culprit was never found.

Kaito noisily sipped on his soda’s straw. “And how many dates since then?”

Face reddening, Shuichi fidgeted. “W-w-well…”

Kaede grinned. “A few here and there. Nothing official yet. And nothing recently given…” She glanced at the newspaper lying before Shuichi. The headline was emblazoned about the bank robbery and recent vandalisms. “…us being so busy with work.”

Shuichi winced at Kaede’s wistful tone. Just last weekend she had asked if he wanted to go to one of her recitals, but Shuichi refused, choosing instead to study the Phantom Thief dossiers for the nth time.

“Speaking of work…” Kaito swallowed a large bite of his yakisoba. “This is my lunch break, so I can’t stay long. What’s up? What did you want to talk to me about?”

Shoulders tense, Shuichi folded his hands. “I wondered if the police had discovered any leads on the bank robbery last week.”

“The one you were caught up in? I heard you went to the hospital after you were knocked out. You all right, bro?”

“I’m well. I just…” Jaw clenched, Shuichi balled his fists. “I arrived too late to apprehend him. Didn’t even glimpse his face. Although I suppose if I did, he would have been wearing a gas mask.”

“Wait, he?” Frowning, Kaito lowered his chopsticks. He leaned back in his chair with a heavy exhale. “Don’t tell me you think it was that phantom thief group DICE.”

Shuichi pounded his coffee mug on the table. “It fits their MO! How could it not be them?” Groaning, Kaito shook his head. Shuichi continued, “You know about their only eye witness account from that elderly man three months ago.”

Kaede twirled a finger around a blond strand of hair. “The witness described them as using clown masks and wearing white uniforms with mismatching buttons that looked like straightjackets. Everyone, save the so-called Dark Magician, a woman who wore a red dress. When the gentlemen laid down his life to prevent the bank from being robbed, DICE left. They didn’t rob the bank or harm anyone. In fact, the old man said the gun they held to his forehead didn’t appear to be loaded either.”

Shuichi nodded. “That’s right. And here we have another weaponless, no causality robbery. Any other thief off the street would simply stroll in and threaten the tellers at gunpoint. This has to be DICE.”

Grunting, Kaito crossed his arms. “Infamous, talented thieves leaving without robbing the place because one person stood up to them? Ha! That old man sounds a couple of cards short of a full deck.”

Shuichi glanced around the area. All the other customers at the food van weren’t looking their way but talking amongst themselves. Car exhaust lingered in the air. Vehicles zoomed past. Leaning in, Shuichi lowered his voice. “This string of casualty-free bank robberies matches the other crimes DICE has committed in the past. DICE sent calling cards in advance to their targets. Despite the bolstered security, they stole world famous jewels and museum art pieces under everyone’s noses – all without killing or seriously injuring anyone. The same with all the bank robberies in the past six months. And what happened six months ago? Their one and only failed heist for the Salvador Ruby.”

Kaito waved a hand in dismissal. “Look, Shuichi. DICE is a world class criminal organization. Wanted in 11 countries across 4 different continents. They’ve lifted priceless artifacts thought impossible to steal with all the odds stacked against them. They’re thieves of the highest caliber. And now you’re telling me they’re making chump change stealing from your local bank down the street?”

Frowning, Shuichi lowered his gaze. Kaede bit her lip.

“I will say this though.” Chuckling to himself, Kaito shook his head. “If they are the same organization, how the mighty have fallen.”

“No matter how improbable it may seem, they are the same group. And now they’re within my grasp. I was so close. I spoke with the Phantom Thief himself! I must capture them, no matter what–”

Why?” Kaito asked, shaking his hands. “Why are you so obsessed with tracking them?”

“I…” Shuichi pulled out a card from the pocket of his trench coat. A crimson playing card emblazoned with a half crying, half laughing clown mask next to a fanned-out deck of playing cards. Beneath was a set of dice, a gold tilde, and gold letters spelling out “DICE” – DICE’s calling card. Shuichi narrowed his eyes. Because they took something from us.

A year ago, Shuichi and Kaede studied a vandalized piano backstage. Kaede gasped. “Look, the strings have been cut! The piano can’t play anything anymore… This is terrible.” Biting her lip, Kaede nervously played with the pearl necklace around her neck. “First someone steals the cash prize of the competition and now they’ve sabotaged the pianos… Do you think you can find out who did this, Detective?”

Humming, Shuichi leaned in closer. “I’ll do my utmost, Miss Akamatsu.”

“What? The piano strings were cut?” A new voice asked. A short man stood in the entrance of the backstage room. He wore a polo and was miked up like the other tech staff members. Frowning, he squeezed his way in between Shuichi and Kaede to look at the piano. “Oh no! How awful… I’ll tell the manager right away!” He dashed out the door before Shuichi could ask him any questions.

A few hours later Kaede noticed her necklace was missing. Shuichi’s golden pocket watch – a gift from his private eye uncle in celebration for Shuichi becoming a detective – had been replaced with a DICE calling card. Shuichi promised Kaede he’d reclaim the stolen items but a year had passed and he had still failed to do so.

Ngh! Shuichi gripped the calling card tight. With my most prized possession stolen, I can’t consider myself a detective. Shuichi glanced up at Kaede. She was frowning down at the table. And I can hardly call myself a gentleman if I can’t keep my promise to a lady.

Shuichi swallowed. Slipped the card in his trench coat pocket – the same pocket Shuichi previously kept his uncle’s watch. “Why I want to apprehend DICE isn’t important. From one friend to another, I am asking for your assistance in catching them, Kaito. As an officer, you can–”

A static voice radioed in. “You there, Kaito? Do you read me?”

Kaito held the answer button on his chest radio. “Yeah, Ryoma, I’m here.”

“There’s been a call about a perp defacing museum artifacts. Tokyo National Museum. We have to go as backup since the rest of the team is dealing with a bomb threat at a school.”

“10-4, heading out immediately.” Kaito stood, leaving his half-finished food untouched. “I’m sorry, bro, but I can’t help. They’re beyond us. There’s more dangerous people closer to home that I have to arrest. Why don’t you stop chasing after DICE and take Kaede out for a date? Think about her for once.”

Lips parted, Shuichi stared. Without looking back, Kaito ran to his police car and drove off. Jaw clenched, Shuichi gripped his coffee’s mug so hard his knuckles whitened. How could Kaito say that? After all we’ve been through…

Kaede tugged at a stand of her blond hair. “You know… maybe Kaito is right. We should take a little bit of time off. Relax. I do have another piano recital coming up…”

Shuichi gulped down the last of his coffee. Glanced at his watch. “There’s still time. We have to request access to security feed, question potential eyewitnesses, determine DICE’s next hit and prepare countermeasures…”

“I can’t, Shuichi.”

Eyes wide, Shuichi snapped his head up. “What?”

Wringing her hands, Kaede lowered her head. “I want to catch the phantom thief, too. Help solve mysteries with you and reclaim my necklace but… I also want to enjoy your company without the pressure of work sometimes, you know? Rededicate myself to my pianist career.”

Shuichi gazed at the bottom of his empty coffee mug. I see… Swallowing, Shuichi closed his eyes. Sucked in a breath. Trench coat flapping, Shuichi stood up and turned away. “Then I wish you the very best, Miss Akamatsu. You’ll be a great pianist one day. I’ll recover your grandmother’s necklace soon.”

“Shuichi, wait!”

He disappeared in the crowd of passersby. Lips parted, Kaede stared out at the crowd. Other customers talked quietly. Ordered food from the food truck. Hanging her head, Kaede buried her face in her hands.


Exhaling, Himiko drummed her fingers against a bar counter. DICE had repurposed a casino marked for demolition as their hideout. Elbow on the counter, Himiko gazed at her fellow DICE members. Pizza boxes were messily thrown onto the billiards table. The news on the wall TV droned on in the background. Marie sat at a blackjack table, aimlessly running her finger around her glass’ edge. From his seat Punk tossed a balled-up paper, aiming for a red Styrofoam cup. Missed. “Damn it,” he muttered. Phantom lobbed a dart at the wall. The dart bounced off the wall, completely off the mark.

Himiko flashbacked to earlier times. Punk’s and Phantom’s arms over each other’s necks, swaying side to side and singing. Marie laughing. Kokichi standing on the table to make a toast. How loudly everyone cheered.

Shaking her head, Himiko slipped off the barstool. Dress swishing, Himiko clipped her way deeper into the casino. This farce has gone on long enough.


Kokichi stood before a window in the casino’s CEO office. An executive desk stood near the back of the room. Before it, a set of chesterfield couches with gold throw pillows flanked a table. Large abstract paintings hung on the wall. The red carpeting bore a repeating pattern of the four card suits. The far wall had large windows overlooking the Tokyo cityscape. Arm against the window, Kokichi gazed out into the night.

Kokichi’s reflection looked back at him. He wore a white suit vest with a checkered ascot. Silk top hat. A white cape with a gold chain fastener running across his chest. The inside of Kokichi’s white coat was light purple.

The heater hummed. Muffled noises of the DICE members sounded outside. Closing his eyes, Kokichi exhaled.

The door opened. Kokichi glanced up. In the window’s reflection he spied Himiko. As the Dark Magician, she wore a crimson mermaid dress with black accents. Low cut neckline with off-shoulder sleeves. Long red gloves made of silk. Just as breathtaking as when I first watched one of her magic shows.

Himiko walked over toward Kokichi’s side. Rather than meeting her gaze, Kokichi looked down at the gold pocket watch in his hand. Its engraving read, “To my nephew, Shuichi. Congrats on becoming a detective.”

Himiko scowled at the watch. She muttered, “Not that trophy again… such a bad habit.”

Kokichi fought a smirk. Aww, but staying after a heist to snitch police’s personal items is always such fun. They’re my trophies. Kokichi gripped the pocket watch. And since this “Shuichi” doesn’t stop tracking down DICE whenever we’re in Japan, this trophy is my favorite. I’ll always carry it in the one place he’ll never find it – on my person. Because no third-rate detective is ever gonna catch me.

Himiko asked, “Why don’t you join the celebration? Although…” Himiko held a gloved finger to ruby red lip. “The op isn’t especially worth celebrating, is it? Very simple, effortless. Almost lazy even. Using knockout gas in the central air. The rest of DICE in the back, disguised as plumbers with a van for our getaway vehicle and to store the stolen money in the back. I’ve performed more complex spells onstage as a magician before I joined DICE.”

Kokichi’s jaw clenched. Not this again. Man, this gets tiring.  

Exhaling, Himiko turned her back to the window and crossed her arms. “What happened to the missions we used to do? With a few more years and more personnel the Louvre could have been in our grasp. Just think of it.” Himiko leaned in close, her strawberry shampoo scent washing over him. Kokichi’s heart pounded. She whispered in his ear. “Hammurabi’s Code. The French Crown Jewels. The Mona Lisa. We’d be the best thieves in history.”

“And speaking of Paris…” Himiko hugged his arm to her chest. “Remember that one time we had dinner and champagne overlooking the city?” Smiling coyly, she ran a finger down his arm. If Kokichi turned his head, his lips would meet hers. “How we walked to streets and you pulled me in that alley–”

Kokichi shook off Himiko’s grasp. “Those days are over, Himiko.”

“Your brother did not want this!” snapped Himiko. Her voice echoed in the large room.

Kokichi tensed. Memories flashed through his mind. His older brother pushing Kokichi away, taking the bullet for the leader. Kokichi crying as pressed his cape to his brother’s bleeding chest. His brother smiling one last time as he choked, “Go.”

Kokichi swallowed hard. Screwed his eyes shut. What if Himiko’s next…?

Hand over her chest, Himiko stepped towards Kokichi. She spoke quietly. “Yes, stealing the Salvador Ruby was too much for us to handle. Yes, your brother died ensuring we could escape. But he never would have wanted us to live a life like this. We have to move on. Think positively. Think about the future instead of mulling over the past.”

Humming, Kokichi touched his cheek. “Ohh? Who died and made you leader? Last I checked I was numero uno.”

“Kokichi, please! This isn’t the time for jokes and lies. Just look at the state our beloved DICE is in.” Raising her chin, Himiko gazed at Kokichi evenly. “Us robbing ordinary banks is insulting. We haven’t done anything special together in months. Aren’t you bored?” Head bowed, Himiko murmured, “Are we done too?”

Kokichi’s breath hitched. Smiling, Kokichi tilted his head and steeped his fingers. “Bored? Why would I be bored? I just looove arguing with my girlfriend. Highly entertaining. I should get some popcorn.”

Himiko glared. “Your brother rolls in his grave seeing how you’ve dragged DICE down to this state. Because of your cowardice. And no lie you tell yourself can change that truth.”

Kokichi’s eyes flashed. The two stared each other down. The building creaked. Muffled noises from the party drifted through the door.

Cape snapping, Kokichi whipped around and left out the door.


Kokichi strode towards the front of the house, to the party area. But Kokichi didn’t hear any chatting or bustle. Only the TV. All the DICE members stared at the wall mounted TV. Frowning, Kokichi approached a billiard table. “What’s going on?”

Marie silently glanced at him before returning her gaze to the TV. Himiko walked up by Kokichi’s other side. She scanned everyone’s strained faces before turning to the TV.

Onscreen a female anchor reported, “This just in. A group of thieves have destroyed the Beryl Emerald, housed in the Tokyo National Museum, and half a dozen other priceless artworks besides.” The screen showed the museum’s interior. Deep grooves ripped into paintings on the wall as if slashed with a sword. Ancient pottery smashed. Pieces of the emerald lay on the floor like green pebbles.  

Hands on his forehead, Punk shook his head. “This is messed up.”

Phantom murmured, “What thief in their right mind…?”

“Nothing appears to have been taken,” the reporter noted. “Only destroyed or vandalized. The culprits left behind a calling card.”

A dark green business card filled the screen. A coiled snake with jeweled red eyes bared its fangs. Had red venom splotches like blood.

“This is the calling card of the Black Mamba, a group of thieves, who have gaining notoriety in recent months for vandalizing historical artifacts and paintings. Horrifyingly enough, the Black Mamba left a note on the card, saying their next target is the Salvador Ruby in the Cabochon Gem Gallery in three weeks’ time. Authorities assure that they will keep the artifacts safe and apprehend these criminals.”

Biting her lip, Himiko turned to the phantom thief. “Kokichi…?”

Eyes wide, Kokichi stared at the TV. They dare…? They want to destroy it. The jewel my brother died trying to steal…! Head bowed, Kokichi’s bangs covered his eyes. His fists shook at his sides.

“The loss of these priceless historical and culturally rich artifacts will be felt across the world. Scientists question if these pieces could ever be properly repaired…”

Kokichi’s low voice cut through the broadcast. “Phantom, Punk. Start researching Black Mumba’s every heist. Marie, Himiko. Head the team and case the Cabochon Gem Gallery.”

Phantom started. “B-boss?” Marie raised a brow.

“The dice have been cast.” Kokichi’s eyes smoldered violet fire. “And their number is up.”


Kaede sat on her couch in her pink pajamas. Sniffing, Kaede tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Shuichi and I may have had a falling out but it’ll be okay. Huffing, she stabbed her bowlful of ice cream with a spoon. Ate it. It’s better this way. I can just focus on piano.

Kaede flipped through the channels. A baseball match. Cartoons. Romcom with a couple kissing. Kaede winced. Changed the channel.

“We have breaking news. Earlier today several museum artifacts were stolen from the Tokyo National Museum by a group known as the Black Mamba. Their next target is the Salvador Ruby in three weeks…”

Kaede dropped her spoon. Salvador Ruby? Then DICE will… “Shuichi!” Heart seizing, Kaede dialed the detective on her phone. “Shuichi, have you seen the news?”

“Yes. The day I finally capture DICE is here.”

But it’ll be dangerous… Biting her lip, Kaede sucked in a breath.

“Okay, I’m coming too. This time they won’t get away. This time for sure.”


Kaito stood on the front steps of the Cabochon Gem Gallery, barking orders at scrambling officers. Flood lights were set up at intervals along the museum’s metal fencing. Police cars and tape blocked the road. The museum garden’s benches and gazebo sat empty; instead officers patrolled the grounds. Even a few police helicopters flew overhead. The crisp night air chilled Kaito, keeping his sense sharp.

Kaito thrust a finger at an officer. “You! Status report. How’s our perimeter?”

“We’ve set up a blockade of the surrounding two city blocks. No signs of any suspicious activity so far, sir.”

“I want check-ins every ten minutes. You hear me? Ten minutes. We’re not letting anyone destroy these artifacts.”

Snapping his heels, the officer saluted. “Yes sir!”

Ryoma jogged up to Kaito, going around the fountain and up the steps. “Kaito. There’s been reports of the backup arriving on scene.”

“You mean from the neighboring 8th and 9th district? Good. About time.”

“No, from the Public Security Intelligence Agency.”

“What–?”

“And we’re taking command.” A uniformed woman with long black hair and red eyes strolled up to them, along with two subordinates. Her blue uniform hugged her curves. She moved with grace of a black panther.

Kaito’s jaw dropped. “Wow…”

Ryoma pulled down his hat’s brim. “Oh boy. Stay focused, Kaito.”

The woman flashed her badge. “I’m Maki Harukawa of the First Intelligence Department, Section 1, of Domestic Security Issues. We’re assuming the head of this operation so give me an update on the current situation.”

Jaw clenched, Kaito jabbed a finger. “No way in hell. We’re Tokyo’s best division of officers. We have experience dealing with these art thieves. I’m not relinquishing an inch of control over until I hear word from my superior officers back at HQ–”

Maki’s chest radio went off. “Targets spotted. A man dressed in a white suit and cape. Early twenties.”

Kaito’s chest constricted. It’s DICE. Holy hell, Shuichi was right about them appearing.

“…he’s by the southwest entrance. Engaging in pursuit.”

Maki nodded. “Under–”

Kaito’s radio buzzed. “Chief Momota. Suspect spotted in the north corridor of the second floor. By the elevator.”

Frowning, Kaito and Maki exchanged glances. Kaito wondered, “So is he inside or outside…?”

“Chief! Chief Momota!” Kaito’s radio tuned in. “We just got in touch with the museum security detail in the security room. There’s been 7, no, at least 8 sightings of an intruder in a white cape in all different locations!”

What?”

Maki narrowed her eyes. “It’s a decoy.” She darted inside the museum.

Fist balled, Kaito gazed up at the museum. But where is the phantom thief really? If he’s actually inside… Shuichi, Kaede, watch your back. These phantom thieves are here to prove something. And they won’t show any mercy.


Himiko and Kokichi ran down a hallway in the museum. Their shoes smacked against the dark green marble floor. Historic paintings of Japanese princesses and flowers covered the walls. Glass stands displayed jewelry that twinkled in the fluorescent light. The place reeked of floor polish.

Kokichi drew to a halt. He cocked his head. “Did you hear that?”

Himiko stilled. “I didn’t.”

Smiling, Kokichi chuckled. “We got company.”


Shuichi and Kaede flew down a hallway, paintings blurring past them on either side. Biting a lip, Shuichi glanced around him. “They have to be around – Whoa!”

A throwing knife lodged itself a few centimeters from Shuichi’s shoe. He fumbled to a stop.

Kaede frowned. “What’s wrong – Ahh!!”

Shuichi whipped around. A woman in a wine-red dress dropped down from the ceiling and held a knife to Kaede’s throat. Shuichi held out an arm. “Kaede!”

“Ah, ah, ah! Not so fast, my beloved detective.” A cold barrel was pressed to Shuichi’s forehead. Shuichi went cold.

“Shuichi!” Kaede cried. Wide eyed, she stared at him. All the blood had drained from her face.

“It’s okay! It’s okay,” called Shuichi. “Don’t struggle. I’ll do the talking. I’ll get us out of this. I won’t let them hurt you. I – Ngh!”

Gun to Shuichi’s head, Kokichi wrenched back one of Shuichi’s arms, pinning him. “Nee-heehee. What hidden gems do we have here?”

Scowling, Shuichi tried pulling his arm free. He grit his teeth. “The Phantom Thief, leader of DICE himself. And the Dark Magician. We meet again.”

Kokichi pressed the gun harder to Shuichi’s temple to stop his squirming. Shuichi stilled. The thief raised a brow. “Oh? Surely by now you’ve heard reports of my other phantoms running throughout the grounds by now. Who says I am the leader?”

“There weren’t any sightings of the Dark Magician. I know the leader of DICE is short, from my memory and given the angle of how you held my neck at last month’s bank robbery. And most telling – your distinctive, horse-like laugh.”

Smirking, Himiko raised a brow at Kokichi. He tsked. I’ll have you know that being lithe and petite is quite an asset for a thief.

Shuichi exchanged a glance with a pale Kaede. “Let her go. Please. You can have me but she’s not a detect–”

Humming, Kokichi idly tapped the pistol to Shuichi’s head. “Well, well. As regrettable as it is, I don’t have a lot of time to play with toys right now. But since you’re here, you might as well answer a couple of questions I have. Nice and quick, please and thank you! I was not expecting to see you. I know aaaall about you chasing DICE down. Ever since I stole your pocket watch. But how didja know I’d be here?”

Shuichi swallowed hard. Sweat slid down his forehead. Kokichi could practically see the gears churning in the detective’s head. “Anyone who lingers after a heist to flitch items off of officers likes to play games. Take a risk. I know all of your heists of the past year. Even the ones the police didn’t inform the public. All 37 of them.”

Kokichi stilled. H-how?

“Officers are too mortified to file a theft for their own missing property, but civilians aren’t. But notably before and after major heists, there’s an uptick in thefts reported at magic shows.”

Mouth agape, Himiko cried, “After my magic shows, too?!”

“Ahaha, what can I say? I got magic fingers. But you know that already.” Kokichi winked. Flushing, Himiko looked away, shaking her head.

Taking a deep breath, Shuichi closed his eyes. “But more relevant I know about your unsuccessful attempt to steal the Salvador Ruby. The Black Mamba has a history of vandalizing artifacts; there’s no way you’d allow anyone else destroy what you tried to steal.” Shuichi gazed softly at Kaede. “So you came here to correct a mistake you made. You’re here to stop the Black Mamba. And there can’t be any risker, any more dangerous game than that.”

Eyes narrowed, Kokichi assessed Shuichi. The pipes groaned. Above their heads, the sound of police officer’s running footsteps sounded ahead. Sirens wailed. Kaede trembled in Himiko’s grip.

“‘The Most Dangerous Game’. Short story by Richard Connell in 1924. Well, well. You’re quite well read, Mister Detective.” Kokichi chuckled deep in his throat. “Yes, this heist resembles something like that perhaps.”

Himiko glanced at the dark hallway behind them. “We’re running out of time.”

“I know, okay? Geeeez! Well, we’re at quite the impasse, aren’t we, Mister Detective? You see, I simply can’t just let you go, but there’s a group of thieves to stop. So what to do–?”

“Let’s play a game,” declared Shuichi.

“I’m listening.” Himiko scowled at Kokichi but stayed silent.

“Instead of us apprehending you, or you kidnapping or harming us, we compete to see who can stop Black Mamba first.”

Kaede leaned forward, nicking her skin. A trail of blood flowed down her neck. “Shuichi, no! You’d throw away your chance to arrest DICE? After you worked so hard for so long?”

Shuichi’s gaze lingered at the blood trailing down Kaede’s neck. Swallowing, Shuichi lifted his chin, eyes flashing. “It is of little consequence. I’ll merely find DICE at their next target.”

Kokichi hummed in thought. Everyone jumped at the squelch of boots deeper in the museum – closer than before. Himiko shot Kokichi a look. He nodded. “Very well. I accept your proposal. I’ll save catering to my adoring fans after us adults settle business. Tootles!” Kokichi and Himiko hurled smoke bombs on the ground. Took off running.

Shuichi and Kaede covered their mouths and noses with the crook of their arms. Coughing, Shuichi waved away the smoke. “After them!” They bolted after the fleeing pair. 


Kokichi and Himiko walked through a dark hallway. “If my disguised DICE members are running around throughout the museum and haven’t found the Black Mamba yet, there’s only one place they could be.” Himiko nodded.

Grunting, Kokichi opened the bilco doors to the roof. The crisp night air washed over him. Kokichi shivered. Helping Himiko up, Kokichi stepped onto the roof. Large, boxy air conditioners hummed loudly. Exhaust pipes protruded up from the flat roof. Flood lights cut bright swathes into the dark sky. Kokichi scanned the area. Strained his ears. Four floors below them police bustled and shouted orders. Sirens sounded. A rustle of movement to their right. Kokichi’s hand flew to the pistol strapped at his waist. “Look at what the cat burglar brought in.”

A tall, thin man knelt over an unconscious officer about to take the uniform to use as a disguise. A woman with platinum blonde hair in a high bun stood behind them.

Bingo. Smirking, Kokichi set his hands on his hips. “Was the security in the gallery room too much for you to handle, Black Mamba? On your way out? Korekiyo? Angie?”

Kiyo narrowed his eyes. “I see you have researched us well, DICE. I hold much respect for you. I only wish we could have met under different circumstances when our targets did not align. But what suggests that we were leaving?”

Tsking, Kokichi waved a hand. “Puh-lease. Black Mamba only has two members. We have over 10,000 in our organization but we still couldn’t steal the Salvador Ruby. You have a snowball’s chance in hell.” Jaw clenched, Kiyo and Angie glared at him. Grinning, Kokichi gazed down on them. “Aw, does someone feel called out right now?”

Kiyo’s cheek twitched. His long hair was gathered in a low ponytail with two strands framing his face like fangs. He wore an ebony bodysuit with glowing red lines running down the sides. Small red splatters covered the suit like blood or globules of snake venom. “Even if we were to be making a tactical retreat at the present moment, we would only return later.” Kiyo rested a hand on the hilt of his katana at his waist. “For the sake of our mission, we will destroy the Salvador Ruby.”

Himiko raised a brow. “Mission?”

“Ayup, ayup!” Angie clapped her hands over her head. She wore a tie-dyed two-piece dress with one billowy sleeve over a shoulder and had two slits for her legs. Her other bare shoulder was covered in colored tattoos. A belt of artist tools was slung around her waist. “Yes, our holy quest! All objects of beauty must be destroyed!”

Kiyo pressed a hand to his chest. “I once was an anthropologist who traveled the world, learning about various cultures. But oftentimes, thanks to my studies, I possessed more knowledge about their own history then they did. The world at large is grossly ignorant of art history and historical artifacts.”

Angie hugged herself. “Over the centuries, paintings’ colors fade. Artifacts chip and crack. Statues lose limbs.”

Kiyo chuckled low in his throat. “But if the artifacts were ruined… in the wake of the loss people would long for them all the more. Students would study and appreciate art and history more fervently. The physical may be destroyed, but never the spirit!” Eyes glinting fanatically, Kiyo raised his arms to the side. His voice boomed across the rooftop. “By destroying art, we forever immortalize them!”

Head bowed, Angie folded her hands. “As an artist, I have joined Kiyo on his divine quest. Atua smiles down upon us both!”

Kokichi exchanged a glance with Himiko. “O-kaaay. These guys are coocoo for Cocoa Puffs. There isn’t any sense in talking to them.”

Angie unclipped a large wooden mallet from her belt; the flat of the mallet was larger than a human head. Angie’s sky-blue eyes clouded over. “Heathens. I will sprinkle your blood over the destroyed ruby.”

Crouching, Kiyo unsheathed his sword. “I’ll tear out your nerves and put them on display.”

Himiko pulled out her throwing knives from her magic shows. “Magicians and artists pour their whole heart into their creations. I won’t let you tarnish their works!”

Kokichi unholistered his double pistols. Cocked and aimed them. “Destroying the Salvador Ruby… Disrespecting my brother’s memory…” Teeth bared, Kokichi’s eyes sparked fire. “Unforgivable. Himiko!”

“Yes!”

“It’s time for the final curtain call. I get the man, you the woman.”

Kiyo bolted towards Kokichi, sword glinting. “My blade will slice through your bullets! Taste the venom of the Black Mamba!”

“Divine vengeance!” Angie swung her mallet like a scythe at Himiko.

Kokichi ducked under Kiyo’s blade. Holstered ones of his guns. Jumping back from Angie’s hammer, Himiko threw her knives at Kiyo’s hand, slicing it open. Crying out, Kiyo dropped his sword.

As Angie finished the arc of her swing, Kokichi knocked the mallet out of her hand with a karate chop. Kokichi grabbed the mallet, spun in place, and slammed the hammer into Angie’s midsection. She crumpled to the ground.

Kiyo backed up a step. “Wh-what? No–!”

Kokichi kicked out Kiyo’s feet. Kiyo fell back against the rooftop. When Kiyo tried to rise, Kokichi thrust the gun under Kiyo’s chin. “Tsk, tsk, Kiyo. You should never trust a thief’s word. We’re liars, after all. Now what to do with you…?”

Sweating, Kiyo swallowed hard. He sat leaning back on his splayed hands. The wind blew billowed his hair. “If you aim to kill us or turn us in, do it quick.”

“Naaah, I think I can do one better. You see, I keep coming back to the question of why would thieves destroy goods instead of stealing and selling them. All risk and no reward, y’know? But what if…” Kokichi’s eyes slid over to Angie’s fingernails. They were caked in paint and clay. “You had an artist skilled in creating replicas.”

Kiyo and Angie stiffened.  

Himiko twirled her throwing knives in hand before sheathing them. “You had Angie create fake paintings and artifacts, replace them with the originals in the museums, and destroy the fakes. That way you can sell the originals on the black market for a much, much higher price. Millions, no hundreds of millions more. Because everyone in the world believes the originals are lost. And even if the authorities discovered the originals after you sold them, the police would think they’re replicas.”

Pouting, Kokichi’s eyes welled with tears. “It’s such a shame. If you love art and history that much, why couldn’t you think about giving instead of taking from others? I hate liars most of all. Oh well!” Like a light switch, Kokichi smiled brightly. “This way is much more fun! It’s only a matter of time before we find your hideout with all of the originals. Sell or return them to the museums ourselves. Ahaha! It’s curtains for you, Black Mamba! We have a royal flush.”

Grunting, Angie raised herself up on an elbow while holding her stomach. Her eyes seethed. “S-stealing from another thief? You’re like a police officer! Atua will strike you down for your treachery.”

Hand on his hip, Kokichi smiled over at Himiko. “Y’know, I think I could get used to this life of targeting thieves instead of stealing artifacts. Just like that Most Dangerous Game short story. You know it, Mr. Anthropologist?”

Kiyo blinked. “Why yes. It’s the tale of a game hunter who becomes bored hunting animals so he hunts…” Kiyo pales.

An unnaturally wide grin stretched across Kokichi’s face. “Humans.”

Kiyo and Angie exchanged glances.

“Nee-heehee! Let’s tie up business, shall we, Himiko?” The two handcuffed Kiyo’s and Angie’s hands and feet.

“Phantom Thief!” The bilco doors burst open. Shuichi and Kaede rushed onto the roof, panting hard. Upon seeing Kiyo and Angie, Kaede gasped. “Is that…?”

Jaw clenched, Shuichi raised his detective badge. “Private Detective Shuichi Saihara! You’re all under arrest! And that includes you, Phantom Thief, Dark Magician!”

Under his breath, Kokichi muttered, “Well this is getting to be a bit of a full house, now isn’t it?” Kokichi gestured grandly to the captured thieves. “You’re too late, Detective. The show is over.”

Himiko smirked. “But we still have one last trick up our sleeve.”

“Yes, it’s time for this joker and queen to be disappearing.”

Together Kokichi and Himiko ran towards the roof’s edge. Jumped off. Gasping, Shuichi and Kaede ran to the ledge.

An engine hummed. A whirr of blades.

Shuichi’s mouth dropped. “You must be jesting…”

A helicopter arose with a DICE member piloting it. Kokichi and Himiko hung from a rope ladder trailing out the helicopter’s open door. Kokichi pulled out something from his pants pocket. “Looking for this, detective?” He tossed it.

Fumbling, Shuichi caught it. His uncle’s pocket watch.

Kokichi shouted over the helicopter’s noise. “For your assistance today, I’ll let you keep that as a trophy. But I’ll be holding onto Kaede’s necklace for next time. Catch us if you can!”

Wind billowing his trench coat, Shuichi gazed up at them. “I will! Mark my words, I will apprehend you one day!”

As the helicopter flew away, Kokichi laughed maniacally. His peals echoed through the night.

Down below, police officers pointed up at the sky. Kaito, Ryoma, and Maki looked up. Lips parted, Kaito shook his head. “That son of a gun. Ryoma! Assemble the squad! I’ll radio HQ and request air support!”

“Yes sir!” Police officers scrambled to follow orders.

The helicopter flew across the Tokyo cityscape, leaving the museum behind. Kokichi looked down at the city flying past their feet. Streetlights glowed like a sea of stars on the ground. People resembled ants. The wind buffeted Kokichi’s and Himiko’s hair and clothes.

As he hung on the ladder, Kokichi briefly closed his eyes. “You were right, y’know.”

Himiko went, “Nyeh?”

“About me being bored with this lifestyle of stealing from banks. I just…” The image of his brother bleeding out flashed through Kokichi’s mind. “I didn’t want to lose any–!”

Himiko nodded. “I know, Kokichi.”

Kokichi gazed in the direction of the museum. “Using our thievery skills to catch and expose criminals the police and detectives can’t touch… All the while dodging arrest ourselves. What a rush! A thrill! It’s far more dangerous and riskier than anything we’ve ever done.”

Himiko smiled. “But I think your brother would be proud.”

Kokichi reached for Himiko’s other hand. Held it. Gazing evenly into her eyes, Kokichi asked, “Will you marry me?”

Himiko gasped.

“I don’t care if you or I die tomorrow. I would regret not getting married to you when we had the chance more than any pain I’d feel.” Kokichi grinned. “Because being a thieving, criminal-catching, married dynamic duo with you and DICE is the kind of life I wanna lead!”

Tears swam Himiko’s eyes. “Of course, I’ll marry you. I’ve been waiting for years, you stupid Panta boy. I ought to curse you.”

Kokichi chuckled low in his throat. “You can hex me anytime, babe.” He leaned in and joined his lips to hers in a kiss.   

As the sun rose, turning pink and orange, the helicopter flew off into the horizon.

Notes:

I struggled between setting this fic in modern day or in the 1800s when Sherlock Holmes lived, but I was so attached to that helicopter ending it had to be modern day lol. Thanks for reading! I am enjoying all of the Oumeno week submissions so far! ^_^

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