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It all started one late night after practice. Rosie was moving her arms from one side to the other, jumping up and down, stretching her legs to wherever their new choreography asked her to. She liked it a lot. Most of the moves were proposed by Lisa, making her proud of the maknae. She proposed a few ideas herself and their choreographer actually listened this time, incorporating some and improving others before they were added to their latest choreography. Their new single ‘Crazy Over You’ needed one and that’s what they were practicing on.
Rosie enjoyed the dance and she loved the song but the memory of the choice for it to become their new single wasn’t something she particularly liked. It obviously did not have anything to do with the fact that it was Jisoo’s idea, or that her suggestion for ‘You Never Know’ to be the new single had been dismissed as soon as Jisoo put out hers. Well, maybe it had something to do with that, but so what? It’s not like Rosé hated Jisoo, not deeply, not really. It’s not like she couldn’t, just that she wouldn’t, for the band’s sake. Her love for her other bandmates and their dreams outweighed her pettiness towards their unnie.
She tolerated her enough to not raise any suspicion among the other members, and Jisoo did the same. That did not mean Jisoo’s smirk after her suggestion had been chosen over Rosé’s went unnoticed. The older did a great job at hiding it, yes, but Rosé noticed it anyway. She noticed everything Jisoo did. She wasn’t a stalker, do not get her wrong. It’s just that Jisoo demanded to be seen. Whenever she entered a room, heads turned her way. Her voice was loud, maybe not as loud as Lisa’s, but loud enough for people to notice it and maybe that’s why Rosé couldn’t stand her. She irradiated confidence and that irritated Rosé. There was nothing Jisoo couldn’t do without a bright smile on her face.
Rosie on the other hand, was really shy. The only times she spoke her mind was when music was involved. Whenever Teddy suggested she sang a note or strum a chord a different way and she didn’t think it to be right, she wouldn’t do it but she made sure he understood why she was unmoving on this account. She was so passionate about music that whenever Teddy told her to lower her notes a bit, “like Jisoo would”, she wanted to punch the wall. But she would try not to let it get to her because Rosé was the main vocalist while Jisoo was just the lead. At least that’s what she thought to comfort herself, knowing fully well her solo was nowhere in sight.
So yeah, seeing Jisoo smirk at her long enough for Rosé to notice made her blood boil. She wished she could scream at her, tell her she wanted to smack that smug expression out of her face, kick that cocky attitude out of her body and just be done with her. But she couldn’t, so she didn’t. She knew how much would be at stake if YG noticed there was some kind of rivalry or issues between the band members.
She had been so lost in her Jisoo thoughts that Jennie had to push her shoulder slightly to bring her back to Earth.
“Hello? Rosie?” said Jennie.
“Sorry, unnie, what were you saying?” replied Rosé.
“I was just asking you if you wanted to join me and Lisa on a food date.” Thinking about third wheeling her way through dinner made her lose the appetite she didn’t know was there before.
“No, thanks, unnie. I’m actually pretty tired. I’ll just skip dinner and head to bed,” said Rosie in the kindest way possible so her friends wouldn’t take offense. Jennie showed her the gummiest smile and Lisa warned her of all the fun she would be missing out on, both of them trying to hide the fact that they wanted to spend dinner alone.
As she saw her friends filing out of the room, she started walking the steps herself without failing to notice Jisoo wasn’t following them. She realized she probably missed Jisoo telling them she was gonna stay behind and practice a little more when she zoned out. Well, no one can deny she needs the practice, she thought and then immediately felt bad about it. She knew Jisoo worked HARD. She worked the hardest. Maybe that was one of the reasons why hating Jisoo would be absurd. She fought her way to the top. Just like Rosé herself had.
She was so lost in her Jisoo thoughts again, she missed the last step and almost tripped. Damn it, she thought, I hope Jisoo didn’t see that. Almost immediately after the thought occurred to her, Jisoo said in a mocking tone, “Watch your step, Chaeyoung-ah.” She hated her. She hated when she called her Chaeyoung. Only her parents called her Chaeyoung and they only did it when they were mad. All through her trainee years, she introduced herself as Rosé and let her close friends call her Rosie. Jisoo never called her that and it pissed her off.
The first time they met was when she first arrived at the YGE company building. The lady by the office counter pointed to the left as soon as little Rosie positioned herself behind the counter without so much as a glance at her. So she started walking along a huge hallway hoping to find whoever it was she had to find. She was admiring the navy blue ceiling which had white carvings making different weird figures, when suddenly she bumped into a girl walking out of one of the multiple rooms that lined both sides of the hallway. The girl fell to the floor and accidentally pulled Rosie with her. Unfortunately, young Rosé was carrying her guitar case on her back and she hit the girl’s forehead with it when she tripped sideways. Rosie heard the girl cry out in pain. She immediately turned around to tell the girl she was sorry but the words got stuck in her throat when she saw her. She was sitting on the ground holding her two hands to her forehead but Roseanne could see her face in between hands that had the cutest moles in them. She glimpsed the most perfect face she had ever seen in her life. The girl’s eyes, nose and heart-shaped lips were the most stunning combination. Her dark hair flowed past her shoulders and looked better than the finest silk. She stared for another whole minute before finally saying, “I’m sorry.”
The girl looked up and Roseanne could already see the bruise forming on the top left side of her forehead. She flushed. She felt so bad. The girl gave her the brightest smile Rosie had ever had the honor of seeing and said, “I’m okay,” in Korean.
Rosé knew Korean, but only the basics. Her mother talked to her in Korean when she was little but all her friends talked to her in English. So she liked English better. Her dad also talked to her in English so her mother eventually dropped their native language and got accustomed to English as well. Roseanne never thought she would audition for a Korean company years later so she never minded her masterless Korean. Not knowing how to reply in the language the beautiful girl in front of her had spoken, she stuttered, “Uh, um, okay.”
The girl kept smiling but other than that she gave the Aussie no response, so Rosé asked, “Do you know English?”
It was the other girl’s turn to look confused now. Rosie was thinking how adorable she looked when two girls came running up to them screaming, “Unnie!”
The girl looked at them and smiled again. Rosé was thankful for that, although she missed the cute confused look from before. “Jisoo-unnie, who’s this?” asked one of the girls. “Uh, I don’t know Jendeukie, we just ran into each other,” replied Jisoo. Jisoo, Rosé thought, what a beautiful name. She didn’t understand what Jisoo had replied though or what the other girl had asked, so she asked the girls if they knew English. Both of them said yes.
She engaged in conversation with the two English speaking girls who introduced themselves as Jennie and Lisa, after mentioning something the Aussie already knew. That the girl she ran into was Jisoo and that she didn’t speak English. Rosé told them about her Korean language issue and Lisa told her she had the same issue when she first arrived and that she was slowly but surely learning the Asian language, so she started feeling better. Jennie was avidly translating to Jisoo what they were telling Rosé, and the latter felt proud when she understood Jennie telling Jisoo what the Aussie’s name was. But she was completely taken aback when Jennie asked her if she had a Korean name.
“Jisoo is wondering if you have a Korean name,” she said.
“It’s Chaeyoung,” she said after a couple seconds, “but I don’t like being called that.”
Jennie quickly translated to Jisoo and the older made a face. Why is she doing that?, Rosie asked herself. Her calm self-question turned into an angry one when Jennie spoke again.
“Jisoo says she will call you Chaeyoung.”
Rosie couldn’t believe her ears. She had specifically said she did not like being called that way. Why was Jisoo entitled enough to defy her on what she preferred to be called? Then, she wondered if the girl was doing it as payback for Rosie hitting her with her guitar case. Maybe she thinks I did it on purpose?
After all the introductions, Lisa asked her to play something for them. She looked at Jisoo’s forehead instinctively and noticed the girl’s big, red bruise was starting to turn into a light shade of purple. She wanted to say sorry again but she stopped herself after remembering Jisoo insisted on calling her Chaeyoung. Not that Jisoo was addressing her at all. It looked like she was uncomfortable but she did not understand why. It was Jisoo who was doing something Rosie didn’t like, not the other way around. And she had already apologized for the bruise. Isn’t that enough? She decided to pay no mind to Jisoo and grant Lisa’s wish. They stayed up till early morning playing songs and singing along. Both Rosie and Jisoo being able to cover up the fact that there was something weird between them so as not to alter the other two girls.
Rosé rolled her eyes as she recalled the memory and whatever had gone wrong between them, which Rosé knew was the fact that Jisoo made it her life choice to bother her eternally by calling her Chaeyoung over an accident that happened when they were kids. She decided to ignore Jisoo’s sarcastic warning and kept walking. She heard Jisoo giggle. She hated how she found the sound adorable. It wasn’t her fault. Jisoo was made to be loved. Everything about her was pretty and beautiful and nice and soft and warm. And she wished she could just swallow her pride and make Jisoo swallow hers so they could be friends. It made complete sense to Rosé that she didn’t like Jisoo but could not deny why everyone else loved her. Jisoo had the same spell on her that she had on everyone else. That’s why she found Jisoo’s giggle adorable and her laugh so endearing and her face so perfect. No other explanation ever crossed her mind.
She was halfway through the way to the dorm she shared with her members, so entranced in her third session of Jisoo thoughts, not that that was alarming, when she realized she had left her bag with her keys in the dance classroom. She cursed herself for being so forgetful and started heading back to where she came from, groaning internally due to her tiredness. She was humming to a song Lisa recently showed her, insisting she would love it, when she entered the room and saw the least expected scenario ever.
“Jisoo-unnie, what happened?” she asked, horrified. She started running down the steps of the bowl-like dance classroom, trying to reach Jisoo as fast as she could. Jisoo was on the floor, lying on her back, one of her legs bent at the knee, her foot resting flatly on the floor. Her other leg was resting on the floor too… in the weirdest and most nauseating angle Rosie had ever seen.
“Nothing, Chaeyoung-ah, I’m okay, go back to the dorm,” said Jisoo.
Roseanne couldn’t believe her ears. Here was Jisoo, lying on the floor with a clearly broken leg, and she was still stubborn enough to send her help away, just because it was her. It hurt Rosé. It hurt her that Jisoo hated her enough to prefer that type of pain over Rosé being near her.
“Are you sure, unnie?”
“Yes, I can deal with this on my own,” insisted Jisoo.
“Jisoo, shut up and put your arm around my neck. I’m gonna lift you up,” Rosie widened her eyes as soon as she said that. She avoided Jisoo’s honorific on purpose but just now realized how risky and disrespectful that was. Jisoo’s shocked eyes indicated she realized too but she let it go. Roseanne was relieved.
“NO!” cried out Jisoo, and Rosé could see tears starting to form on the older girl’s eyes. She was shocked. She had only seen Jisoo cry once, back when Jennie twisted her ankle during a concert. It kind of made Roseanne sad that she knew Jisoo would never care for her enough to cry over something happening to her. She pushed the thought aside and asked Jisoo why she didn’t want to get up.
“It hurts too much,” said Jisoo, the grimace on her face indicating she was in a lot of pain.
“Unnie, I know, but I gotta get you to a hospital,” reasoned Rosie.
Jisoo huffed. “Yeah, okay, you’re right. But promise me it will only be you and me.”
Rosie’s heart skipped a beat. “Okay.”
She helped Jisoo up, trying hard to ignore Jisoo’s little whimpers of pain considering each and every single one of them felt like a stab to her heart. After a few steps, or little hops from Jisoo, the older girl said she couldn’t do it and she shifted almost all her weight on Rosie. The younger felt it and immediately stiffened as to not make them fall. An idea occurred to her and she wanted to discard it but it was clear it was their only option.
“I’m gonna carry you, okay?” she asked.
Jisoo said, “No way, Chaeyoung-ah, I’m too heavy for you.”
Roseanne scoffed and said, “Get ready.”
Jisoo shut her eyes and let Rosie do it.
Rosie scooped Jisoo in her arms, trying not to hurt her, and was surprised. Not at how light Jisoo was, but at how strong she didn’t know she was. Carrying Jisoo wasn’t an effortless action but it wasn’t as hard as she thought it’d be.
She started walking up the stairs, carefully. Jisoo’s eyes were still shut and she could see the smallest formed tears threatening to fall from the corner of her eyes. It broke her heart and she didn’t know why. She was supposed to hate Jisoo. She reached slowly for her bag and walked out of the room.
When they got to the entrance of the building, a few people were trailing behind them, asking what had happened. Rosé told them to back away, scared they might bump into Jisoo’s leg, and insisted on taking Jisoo to the hospital herself.
Someone’s assistant was given the task to get Rosie one of the company’s cars and he came back running with the keys in his hands. He helped her open the car door for Jisoo and the older girl struggled to get inside as Rosie slowly put her back down on the car seat. She closed Jisoo’s door, making sure she wouldn’t hit her leg and thanked the assistant. She walked around the car, got in and drove off.
Jisoo was breathing heavy on the front seat and Rosie felt bad. She was driving as fast as she could without breaking the law. She needed to get to the hospital as soon as possible. Jisoo in pain was the worst thing she had ever seen.
She remembered when she was a kid, still in Australia, how she fell on her skateboard and scraped her knee. That pain wasn’t so bad. What was bad was when her mother insisted she needed to disinfect the wound and applied alcohol with a small piece of cotton. She remembered when her parents dropped her off at YG Entertainment and drove away. It had hurt her soul more than anything she had ever experienced. She remembered a time when she was practicing the ‘Boombayah’ choreography with her bandmates and Jennie accidentally hit her in the face with the back of her hand during one of the moves. Her nose bled a little and it felt stuffed and sore for a week.
None of those moments hurt her more than the one she was experiencing right now. She knew she had to try and ease Jisoo’s pain and the only thing that she thought could work was to talk to her and make her forget she was in pain. She said the first thing that came into her mind.
“Why do you hate me?”
Rosie could see Jisoo out of the corner of her eye. She was shocked when she saw Jisoo’s eyes widened. She thought maybe Jisoo moved her leg and that had hurt her. The words that came out of Jisoo’s mouth made her even more shocked.
“I don’t hate you.”
“Could’ve fooled me,” said Rosie.
“I could say the same thing,” said Jisoo, quietly.
“You’ve made it your job to make my life a living hell since I first arrived here,” said Rosie, with the slightest hint of hurt in her voice.
“What are you talking about? You’re the one who doesn’t like me and you always make it clear, at least to me. It’s obvious Jennie and Lisa don’t know a thing,” said Jisoo, bewildered.
“Unnie, I only do it because you do it.”
“Chaeyoung-ah, that’s insane. You started all this,” accused Jisoo.
“That’s it! Right there! All this started because you hate me enough to call me Chaeyoung,” said Rosie.
“What? That’s your name,” said Jisoo, puzzled. “And a pretty one at that,” she added under her breath.
But Rosie heard her, and she couldn’t help her blushing cheeks. She tried to hide it by making an angry face because, really, she was angry. How dare Jisoo say she started their rivalry. Jisoo was the one who started all this. She knew it. Or maybe I’ve been wrong all along, she thought. No. Jisoo was not gonna manipulate her into thinking this was her doing.
“Unnie, I told you I didn’t like that name,” Rosie said in a firm tone.
“When?” Jisoo wondered.
“What do you mean when?” said Rosie, irritated. “First time we met. I even introduced my name as Rosé. You just decided to call me Chaeyoung even though I said only my parents called me that and that I did not like it, at all.”
“I didn’t know you didn’t like it. The reason I call you Chaeyoung is because back then, pronouncing Rosé was hard for me. I did not want to offend you by pronouncing your name wrong. That’s why I asked if you had a Korean name,” said Jisoo, embarrassed.
Wait what? There was a knock on the passenger’s window and Rosie didn’t have time to think about anything else. She realized she had pulled up to the emergency room door and a nurse was tapping on Jisoo’s window. She didn’t know how she didn’t notice they were there already, and she had stopped driving. Hell, she didn’t even remember driving all the way to the hospital. She was too invested in her conversation with Jisoo that her mind went on automatic mode until she stopped driving. I could’ve killed us both, she thought, at least that pain would’ve been bearable.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the car’s alarm signaling that Jisoo had opened her door. As soon as the nurse saw the state of Jisoo’s leg, she called someone else for a wheelchair. A tall man in a scrub came rolling one and Rosie stepped out of the car to help them help Jisoo into it. By the time she reached Jisoo’s side, the two nurses had already seated her. The tall nurse wheeled Jisoo into the emergency room and the other nurse walked behind them, Rosie on her side.
The nurse started asking Rosie pretty basic questions about Jisoo. Her full name, her age and birthday, her blood type, insurance… Rosé was surprised, she knew the answer to all of them.
The tall nurse stopped in the middle of the room and parked Jisoo’s wheelchair next to the reception desk. Rosie looked down at Jisoo and she noticed small drops of sweat on her neck and her forehead, probably due to her still being in pain. She felt so bad for her.
She asked the nurse when they were gonna help Jisoo with her leg. The nurse said right away while Rosie saw the tall man grabbing Jisoo’s wheelchair’s handles. For some reason, she panicked. She got scared. She was scared something might go wrong and Jisoo would get worse. So she asked the normal thing to ask, or so she thought in her head.
“Can I go in with her?” asked Rosie, a bit too fast. She immediately regret it. She was so caught up in her own fear she didn’t stop to think she was the last person Jisoo wanted to be stuck with in a hospital room. But then she saw the look on Jisoo’s face. And the relief that washed over her felt like clean, cool sheets on a hot summer evening.
Jisoo’s face had a hopeful look. And it was just then that she realized the previous look had been a scared one. She had never seen Jisoo be scared of anything. Except that time they went to Oahu and tried parasailing. Jisoo was scared of heights, as they discovered when the unnie of the group said “I’m scary” instead of “I’m scared” in her broken English. But Jisoo had played it off as a joke, and although Rosie could see Jisoo was genuinely scared, judging by the way her feet pressed firmly on the ground before and after she went on the zipline, she didn’t say anything.
The nurse asked her if she was a family member. She was taken aback, not only because the nurse did not recognize them as the international stars that they were, but because she wasn’t Jisoo’s family member, which meant she wasn’t gonna be able to go in with her.
Today seemed like a ‘blurt stupid things out of my mouth without thinking’ kind of day for Rosie. Which explained why the next thing she said was, “I’m her girlfriend.”
Rosie saw Jisoo trying to suppress a smile and it warmed her heart. But then the nurse’s “okay” response brought her back to reality. What was she thinking? I’m not even Jisoo’s friend, how can I be her girlfriend?
When she saw the nurse wheeling Jisoo into a bright hallway, she followed. The nurse stopped and entered a room with a huge silver metal plaque that said ‘Radiology Room’. Then, she asked Rosie to stay outside. Jisoo’s face dropped and Rosie’s heart broke. She didn’t understand why she was feeling all these things. Since when did Jisoo’s emotions rule hers? She pushed the thought away and asked the nurse if it was really necessary for Jisoo to go in alone.
“It will only be a couple minutes. The bone is broken, that’s for sure. So you’ll be able to be with her when we put a cast on it.”
Rosie whispered a small “good luck” to Jisoo and the older girl smiled at her. Rosie’s heart fluttered.
Jisoo was scared. The throbbing pain in her leg seemed to get worse by the second. She had to constantly wipe the sweat off her forehead. The tall nurse told her he had to lift her up. She got more scared. She already knew that meant more pain. As she let him lift her up and lower her on the cold metal bed, she decided to distract herself by thinking about what Chaeyoung said in the car.
All this started because you hate me enough to call me Chaeyoung? I don’t hate her. But Chaeyoung didn’t seem to know that. All this time Jisoo thought Chaeyoung hated her, not the other way around. That’s why she stopped trying to get on her good side. That’s why she decided that ignoring Chaeyoung would be her best move if she wanted to keep the peace in the dorm and around the other girls.
She certainly didn’t know Chaeyoung didn’t like her name. Damn you, Jennie. But could she really blame the younger girl for not translating what Chaeyoung had said? She probably didn’t understand or hear everything the Aussie was telling them. Her accent was pretty thick and anyway, now wasn’t the time to point fingers and start shifting blame. If Kim Jisoo was anything, it was a problem solver. Specially when one of her girls was involved, and she did consider Chaeyou— No, Rosie, as one of her girls.
After what seemed like hours to her, but in truth were only nine minutes, Rosie saw Jisoo being wheeled out of the room. She had fresh tears on her face and Rosé immediately reached out to hold her hand while the nurse wheeled her to the Casting Room.
They all entered the room. Rosie and the nurse helped Jisoo sit on the edge of the hospital bed. There was a doctor already there. His bald head surprisingly complimented his black beard nicely. He even looked handsome in his white coat.
The doctor walked over to the bed and asked Jisoo to lay down. She did as she was told, squeezing Rosie’s hand and her eyes shut whenever she made a painful move. Rosé realized they hadn’t let each other go since she offered her hand to the shorter girl.
Rosé saw the doctor and nurse lift Jisoo’s leg and cut her dance leggings with a silver pair of scissors. Rosie’s eyes widened when she saw how swollen Jisoo’s leg was. She looked at her. The shorter girl looked so small in the big hospital bed. Her face had a permanent look of pain on it. Rosie also noticed that she was paler than usual. She couldn’t stand seeing her like that.
“Isn’t there something you can give her to stop the pain?” she asked, desperately.
“It will be useless. As soon as we get her leg in the cast, she won’t be able to move it and the pain will start to go away,” the doctor said.
Rosie saw the look of disappointment in Jisoo’s face and she wanted to punch the doctor. Let’s see how he likes fixing a broken nose without painkillers.
She watched the doctor put a long sock on Jisoo’s leg. Then, he started wrapping with what look like cotton bandages. For padding, she supposed. Her unnie’s hold tightened and Rosie kept giving her reassuring looks and tiny smiles. I wish I could take her pain away. They started applying what the doctor called “Casting Material”, which had fiber glass and other things Rosé didn’t care to understand. Her gaze and attention were fixed on Jisoo. She wanted to ask her where they stood. She felt like everything had changed. She couldn’t believe Jisoo hadn’t objected when Rosé said they were girlfriends. She didn’t know if the older girl dismissed it because she didn’t wanna be alone. Or maybe the thought of Roseanne being her girlfriend wasn’t too bad for her. Of course it is, you hate each other, remember? But what if they didn’t? What if all this time they ‘hated’ each other because of a misunderstanding? She didn’t know why Jisoo looked so taken aback when they were discussing each others’ feelings in the car. Maybe she recalled the events differently. She was intent to find out.
When she looked the doctor’s way again, she saw he was molding Jisoo’s cast. Jisoo’s face didn’t look too pained anymore. That beautiful face she had always admired from afar, not that she admitted it before. If you told Roseanne one day she was gonna try and memorize Jisoo’s face she would scoff and then laugh at you. She didn’t like Jisoo, why would she want her face in her memory? But right know, her unnie’s face was so close to her, she couldn’t help but stare and take in every single detail of it: the way her eyebrows furrowed whenever the doctor made a move that suggested she might be in pain soon; the natural curl of her eyelashes; her fascinating brown eyes, the way they sparkled at everything new or fun she saw, the deep concern in them whenever Jennie or Lisa were too tired or sad or anything that wasn’t happy, she wished Jisoo would care about her too, and that mix of amusement and anger in them whenever Jisoo wanted to tease Rosé, god I love that look; her small but sharp nose, that Rosie got the sudden urge to bop; her slim cheeks, Rosie loved her slim cheeks even though Jisoo made it a habit to complain about them and say she wanted ‘mandu’ cheeks like Jennie’s; and finally, her heart-shaped lips, she was mesmerized by them, she didn’t understand how someone could say their lips were actually the shape of a heart, you had to be the most lovable person for the universe to allow that to happen to you, and she is, Jennie loved to mentioned them in almost every interview where they were asked about their physical appearance, and she was glad because she was sure if Jennie didn’t mention them, she would. But that would be weird, I don’t even like Jisoo, but didn’t she? If she didn’t like Jisoo why did she have the sudden urge to kiss those lips she was thinking about? STOP! You’re being delusional.
“What color would you like?” Her obviously not delusional thoughts were interrupted by the doctor’s voice.
“Hmmm…” Jisoo actually looked like she was deep in thought and Rosie thought only the older girl could pull off being as thrilled at picking a color as a little kid. Rosé could see her eyes shining. She was glad Jisoo didn’t look like she was in pain anymore, and even better, there was something for her to be excited about from this awful experience. But was it an awful experience? Yes, Jisoo had broken her leg… but that seemed to mend their relationship, at least a little bit.
“Pink!” Jisoo said, excitedly. “To match Rosie’s hair color.”
Roseanne held in a gasp. Jisoo had called her Rosie. Jisoo wanted her cast to be the color of her hair. Jisoo looked happy at the thought of her.
She looked at Jisoo and couldn’t stop the shit eating grin spreading across her face. It seemed to be contagious because Jisoo started smiling widely too. The doctor and the nurse shared a confused look.
“Pink it is,” said the doctor, and started wrapping the pink bandage he had gotten when Rosé and Jisoo were too busy getting lost in each others’ smiles.
“And done,” said the doctor after the pink cast was dry. “I’ll go get the discharge papers for you to sign and then you will be able to leave.”
Jisoo let out a relieved sigh. “Thank you, doctor.”
The doctor smiled and walked out of the room, followed by the nurse.
“I’m—“ Rosie started.
“Thank you,“ Jisoo interrupted. “Oops, sorry, what were you gonna say?” finished Jisoo.
“I was just gonna say that I’m glad you’re okay now,” Rosie continued. “Thank you for what?” she asked, puzzled.
“For keeping your promise.” Rosie was confused at first. Then, she remembered she had promised Jisoo it would only be the two of them. Rosie didn’t even remember she had agreed to that. She was so immersed in the situation and her feelings that leaving Jisoo’s side was never an option, and letting someone else help her wasn’t one either.
“You’re welcome,” Rosie said with a smile on her face. She didn’t know why she was so happy. Maybe the reason was that her unnie was fine, out of danger. But Jisoo’s wellbeing has never been a worry of mine… So why was she happy— No, ecstatic. Why am I ecstatic that Jisoo is okay? And why is the fact that she’s okay because of me making me proud?
Rosie didn’t notice she was deep in her Jisoo thoughts, again. But it didn’t matter, at least not to Jisoo, because she took this opportunity to stare at the pink-haired girl. She liked the way her cast matched with the younger girl’s hair. She liked the way Rosie’s lips curled a little to the side when she was deep in thought. She liked the way Rosé stuck to her side every second, ever since she found her on the floor of the dance classroom. She liked her smile, and her laugh, and her eyes, and her nose, her whole face. She realized in that moment, in that bright white hospital room, with that weird disinfectant smell, that she liked Chaeyoung. The thought was insane, but she knew it was true. All this time, all the grudges and petty fights and bothered looks with her were because she liked her. But they weren’t even friends, so her defense mechanism was to just pretend to hate her back. Because she never actually hated Rosie. Not really. And she had to let her know.
“I’m sorry for calling you Chaeyoung. I really didn’t know you did not like it. I would’ve never done that to bother you, specially not for years. I think Rosie is a really cute name and I understand why you like being called that. I know it’s gonna sound a bit weird but I felt kind of special being the only person around you who called you Chaeyoung, even though you hated me for some reaso— Well, I know the reason now. I can’t believe you thought I hated you. I just never tried to get close to you because you didn’t seem to like me, ever since we were basically kids. I know I already said sorry but I really ho—“ Jisoo was interrupted by Rosie’s lips on hers.
If you told Park Chaeyoung she would be kissing Kim Jisoo in a hospital room after the latter had picked her cast color based on the former’s hair color, she would laugh in your face. But here she was.
She didn’t really know why she did. After accepting the fact that it was okay to be happy her bandmate was okay, her thoughts started spiraling somewhere else. She realized her long rivalry with Jisoo was for nothing. The reason Jisoo called her Chaeyoung was because of a misunderstanding. Maybe Jisoo didn’t understand what Jennie translated to her. Maybe she was in the wrong context of conversation. Hell, maybe Jennie didn’t even translate that part at all. She started wondering why she had decided to hold a grudge over such a petty thing like someone calling you by your name. Because Chaeyoung was her name after all. She tried to defend herself thinking that must have been important to little Rosie, she didn’t have to worry about a lot of things back then.
So after making peace with Jisoo and herself and their fucked up relationship, she wanted to apologize to her unnie. Jisoo beat her to it, though. When Jisoo started apologizing, she was glad. She didn’t even know it was there but she got over the fear of Jisoo not wanting to talk to her and make up. But then, Jisoo started rambling. Her voice started drifting away as Rosé focused on her lips. They were moving so fast. She thought it was funny, it was like a small heart was talking to her. Jisoo’s lips and Jisoo’s heart. Her eyes widened, something Jisoo didn’t notice because she kept rambling. Jisoo was apologizing to her and saying she felt special for being the only person who called her Chaeyoung. Rosie couldn’t contain her excitement.
She looked Jisoo in the eyes and she stared back at her. Jisoo’s eyes were glowing. Rosie realized Jisoo was the most beautiful woman she had ever seen. Then she felt the sudden and overwhelming urge to kiss her. There wasn’t even time for her to debate whether that was a sane idea or not. She leaned forward and captured those dreamy heart-shaped lips she fantasized about quite often.
To say Jisoo felt like she was floating was an understatement. She was perfectly sure her body was levitating. She felt light and full of something she couldn’t describe. It felt like her whole body was on fire but it didn’t hurt. She felt like she didn’t know there was a missing part of her but she knew she had found it. She felt full. She felt complete. She felt Rosie’s lips on hers. And, God, why didn’t we do this any sooner?
“God, why didn’t we do this any sooner?” said Rosie, breathless, after pulling apart from Jisoo’s perfect face.
Jisoo was too stunned to talk. Rosie had read her mind. She felt giddy all of a sudden. Like they were sharing a secret but not even them knew exactly what the secret was.
Rosie started getting worried. Damn, Rosé, why did you do that?
“Jisoo, I’m so sorry.”
“NO!” Jisoo suddenly found her voice.
Rosie’s eyes widened at Jisoo’s loud remark.
Jisoo coughed, then said, “I’m sorry, I just— please, don’t be sorry. You’re right. We should’ve done that a long time ago. But I was just thinking that and then you said it so it kind of shocked me.”
“Oh,” Rosie exhaled, “I’m glad you thought so too. It’s weird, isn’t it? We spend all these years fighting and now we know why.”
“Because you secretly wanted to kiss me?” Jisoo teased.
“NO!” It was Rosé’s turn to exclaim. She could feel her cheeks flushing and Jisoo’s smug grin told her the older girl had done that on purpose. “Well, I mean, uh obviously that too, but I meant that we now know it was a big misunderstanding and I feel bad that I’ve had it against you all this time when nothing was really your fault.”
“It’s fine, I mean, I also had it a bit against you and I’d be lying if I told you all that teasing wasn’t amusing,” Jisoo looked away, her cheeks the faintest shade of pink.
“I’m glad at least one of us was having fun,” said Rosie, with a big teasing smile on her face.
Jisoo looked into her eyes again. Rosie felt lost in them. It was like they were the only two people in the world. Nothing around them mattered at all. Not the doctor nor the nurse, not Jennie nor Lisa, not their company nor their boss. They were completely fixated on each others’ eyes and souls. Rosie felt at peace. Jisoo felt it too.
“I’m gonna kiss you again,” Jisoo said, with all the confidence in the world. Rosie had never heard such sweeter words. Even sweeter was the kiss they shared when their lips locked together. It wasn’t rushed or unexpected like the last one. They both poured their hearts out, letting the other actually see them. Rosie had never felt such vulnerability in a kiss. Jisoo had never shared that much vulnerability in anything. The younger girl started tasting salty water in their kiss. She pulled away to find Jisoo’s eyes filled with tears, some already falling.
“Unnie, what’s wrong?”
Jisoo laughed. “Nothing’s wrong. Everything is perfect actually.”
Rosie had only seen Jisoo cry two times before. One of them being moments earlier when the brunette couldn’t take the pain anymore. This time, it was a beautiful sight. Not because she enjoyed seeing her sad, but because she knew those were happy tears. Jisoo’s gaze was full of love. Rosie felt so overwhelmed her eyes started watering too. Her face broke out into the biggest smile ever. Jisoo’s face mirroring hers. The two girls loved each other so deeply, it was too ingrained in their souls that it took them all this time to realize it. But they knew now and that was all that mattered.
Just then, the doctor walked in with the discharge papers. He was taken aback when he saw the girls in the room crying.
“Is everything okay?” he asked.
It took them a minute to come back to Earth and nod their heads. Jisoo signed the discharge papers. The doctor helped her back into the wheelchair. Rosie went around the bed and started walking to the door behind them.
“I believe you know the exit, right? I have to take care of another emergency. I’ll see you in a month to get the cast off, okay?” He walked away before any of them could answer. Jisoo laughed. Rosie laughed too, just because the sound of Jisoo’s laughter was enough to fill her heart again and make her realize she was genuinely happy right then and there, in that hospital hallway.
Rosie grabbed the wheelchair handles and started wheeling Jisoo across the hallway. Jisoo turned a little to the side so she could put one of her hands on top of Rosie’s.
Rosé helped Jisoo into the car. She even insisted on buckling Jisoo’s seatbelt herself. Jisoo smiled brightly at the gesture. When Rosé got into the driver’s seat, she looked over at Jisoo. Jisoo was already looking at her. Their eyes stayed glued together for the longest time. Rosie didn’t know who reached out first but their hands were glued together too. They didn’t even realize their grips were equally deathly. The tips of their fingers going white as if letting go meant losing their other half forever.
Then, out of nowhere, or maybe not so out of nowhere considering they had gone from hating each other to kissing in the span of less than an hour, Jisoo said, “I love you, Rosie.”
And Rosie said, “I love you, too, Jisoo.”
The End