Work Text:
“Hey there Bakuhoes! Welcome back to my channel.” Bakugou waved to the camera. He was in a red hoodie and sitting in his UA dorm room. “So, on the last video, I got a lot of people asking if I could do a warm look. If you haven’t seen my last video yet, you can check it out. It was a winter look with cool tones. So now, I’m gonna do the warm tones since you all asked. Seriously, a lot of you guys asked.”
He spun around in the chair he was sitting in. “Oh, but first, allow me to give a shout-out to my Patreon people. You guys rock.” A list of names appeared on screen, and Bakugou read them off. “You can find the link to my Patreon in the description. Supporting me means I get to buy more shit to do hair and makeup with, and I do raffles for Ground Zero merchandise. Because remember, yeah I’m an artist, but I’m also a hero!” He grinned. “Anyway, I think I’ve talked enough, so let’s get started.”
Bakugou held up a small bottle of moisturizer. “Okay, as always, the first step is to hydrate the skin with a moisturizer. It’s very, very important to hydrate the skin because if you don’t, it’ll get all crusty and flaky. You don’t want to look like that Shigaraki villain, do you? That’s just a joke, villain simps. Don’t attack me. I bite.” He laughed. “I actually already moisturized today, so I’m not gonna put this on right now. But I wanted to include it in the steps because I know for a fact not all of you take care of your skin. You know who you are.” He grabbed a beauty blender and a small plastic container of water.
“Okay, if you’re not new to my channel, you know what I’m doing,” he said as he dipped the blender into the water. Squeezing it out, he explained, “You always wanna wet your blender first so you don’t waste product.” Bakugou put the water aside and started to apply a foundation. “So, we start with foundation as a base,” he said. “I’ll speed this part up since it’s boring.”
Sure enough, the base application was sped up. When it resumed to normal speed, Bakugou had a colorful palette of eyeshadow. “Now,” he said, “we take a brown that’s a few shades darker than your skin. That’s assuming you’re pale like me. If you have really dark skin, though, you’ll want to take a shade that’s a bit lighter than your skin tone instead. You’re gonna wanna cover half your eyelid. The inside half, closest to your nose. Like this.” He demonstrated as he spoke.
“Next, take a nice orange or yellow. Which one is really up to preference, but I personally find that yellow is a nice contrast to my red eyes. So I’ll be using this bright yellow.” He put some on the eyeshadow brush. “Cover the middle part of your eyelid.” He did it as he spoke. “Then take a white and cover your browbone.” He took a minute to do that.
“Now you want a fiery red. Put it on the outer part of your eyelid and a little bit on the outside corner.” Bakugou demonstrated. “Use a blending brush to blend it together. Then take a bright, warm-colored eyeliner and do a little wing. Line the bottom, too.” He did it, humming a bit as he did. “And that’s your warm eye look. Add blush, lipstick, jewels, or whatever you need to complete the look. That’s all, guys! Thanks so much for watching. See you next time! Boom!” As he said the last word, he brought his fist near the camera like a punch. As it made contact, the video ended.
Bakugou noticed Class 1A burst into laughter as soon as he walked in. “The fuck are you all laughing at?” he demanded. “It better not be me.” He took his seat, glancing in Midoriya’s direction. The green-haired boy covered his mouth as they made eye contact. “Seriously, what the hell’s so funny?”
“Nothing,” Mina said. “Nothing at all.” She, too, cracked up.
“It must be something,” Bakugou said. “Even IcyHot’s smiling.” He pointed at Todoroki, who was grinning like a child. “Whatever. Don’t tell me.” He dropped his bag with a huff.
“We found your YouTube channel,” Sero blurted. He was immediately shushed by the rest of the class.
Bakugou froze. “I don’t have a YouTube channel,” he said carefully. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Okay, Bakuhoe,” Sero grinned cheekily.
Bakugou felt his cheeks grow red. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he repeated.
“Your hair and makeup channel?” Mina said. “You know exactly what we’re talking about.”
“Hair and makeup?” Bakugou scoffed. “What am I, some sort of faggot?”
“You’re literally dating me,” Kirishima said. “So yes, actually.”
“I don’t have a hair and makeup channel,” Bakugou said.
“No one cares that it’s a hair and makeup channel,” Uraraka said. “Normalize dudes with style. We’re laughing because you acted so nice the whole time!” She barely got the sentence out before bursting into laughter.
“Thanks for watching,” Kirishima mimicked.
“You guys rock!” Sero chimed in.
“Welcome to my channel,” Uraraka laughed.
“I’ll fucking kill you all,” Bakugou threatened.
“I think it’s really cute,” Kaminari said. “I wish I could do really good makeup.”
“I wish you’d jump in an incinerator,” Bakugou told him.
“I have an idea,” Mina said. “What if we made an appearance on your channel?”
Bakugou shook his head. “Absolutely not.”
Mina pouted. “Why?”
“Because I’m not putting you on my fucking channel.”
“If you do, I’ll do your laundry for a month,” Mina said.
“No.”
Todoroki looked at him. “If you don’t, I’ll send the video to Touya for the villains to see. They’ll never take you seriously again.”
Bakugou seethed. “You play dirty,” he said. “Fine. You fuckers can be on my channel.”
“You’re welcome,” Todoroki said to Mina.
“Can I?” Midoriya asked.
“Fine.” It sounded like it physically pained Bakugou to say that. “Livestream. Seven PM. My dorm. Don’t be late.” He put his head on the desk. “I hate all of you.”
“EVERYONE SHUT THE HELL UP,” Bakugou ordered. “Live in ten. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six. Five. Four. Three. Two.” He pressed the button. “Hey there, Bakuhoes-”
“You forgot the one,” Kaminari said.
Bakugou closed his eyes. “Hey there, Bakuhoes,” he said again, “and welcome back. Today I have some of my mutual acquaintances here with me. I hesitate to say friends. Meet Mina, Denki, Eijirou, and Deku.”
“Hello!” Midoriya waved to the camera.
“First, special shout-out to Todoroki, who made all this possible.” Bakugou looked directly at the camera and said, “I’ll pay you back, don’t worry.” He cleared his throat. “So now here comes the fun part. Asking what kind of look they want. Guys?” He looked at the others.
“I already did my hair,” Mina said. “I just want a glittery makeup look.”
“I want something yellow,” Denki said. “And can you put little butterfly things in my hair? Barrettes? Please?” He grinned.
Bakugou sighed. “Fine,” he said. He looked at Midoriya and Kirishima. “You?”
“Just do whatever,” Kirishima said. “I trust you.”
“I want something silly and stupid,” Midoriya said.
“So nothing?” Bakugou asked.
Midoriya sighed. “I set myself up for that,” he said. “Do like a face paint thing.”
“I’ll do a skull,” Bakugou said, and Midoriya nodded. He looked back at the camera. “Well, I guess I better get started. I’ll start with you, Mina. Have a seat.”
Mina grinned and sat down. “I’m so excited,” she said. “Are you, Bakugou?”
“Thrilled,” he replied unenthusiastically. “First, we moisturize the skin. Do you moisturize, Mina?”
She looked offended. “Of course I do!” she said.
“Good.” Bakugou nodded. “Then I’ll start with a bit of concealer. I don’t actually have pink concealer, so I’m using a pasty mix of blush and water. It works really well for the not-so-human skin tones and textures.” He said the last bit to the camera. “Close your eyes, Mina.”
She did, and Bakugou worked on covering a few blemishes. “Okay. Now, I think it would be cool to use a deep blue, to contrast with the pink. I’ll use silver as well for your glittery look. Sound good?”
“Yep!” Mina closed her eyes.
“I’m putting the blue on her whole lid,” Bakugou explained to the camera as he worked. “And I’m putting a lighter shade on the outline to blend. Ei, can you hand me the silver eyeliner?”
“Which one’s the eyeliner?” Kirishima asked.
“The one that says ‘eyeliner’,” Bakugou sighed. He took it from Kirishima. “Thanks. Okay, Mina, stay still or the wings won’t come out even.”
“Okay.” Mina stilled, and Bakugou did the eyeliner carefully.
“Keep your eyes closed so it dries,” he warned. “While we wait for it to dry, I’m gonna get the blue lipstick.” He crossed over to a few drawers, opening one.
“Whoa! That’s a lot of colors,” Kaminari said, peering in.
“Don’t touch them,” Bakugou said. He grabbed the dark blue and went back to Mina. “You can open your eyes now. Open your mouth a bit for me.” As Mina complied, he put the lipstick on. He began to blend it at the edges as he told the camera, “I’m with these fuckers everyday, so I’m fine using the products directly on them. If you ever do makeup for someone you don’t know too well, though, use something to apply the makeup instead of using the product itself.” He stood back. “Mina, you’re all done. Look in the mirror. Denki, your turn.”
“My turn!” Kaminari cheered, slipping into the chair. “This is gonna be fun.”
“Uh-huh,” Bakugou said. He glanced at Mina, who was admiring herself. “Alright, you said you wanted yellow?”
“I changed my mind,” Kaminari said. “I want to be Pikachu!”
Bakugou frowned. “You want yellow all over your face?”
“Yeah!”
Sighing, Bakugou went over to the drawer and pulled out a different palette. “Then I’m gonna use face paint,” he said.
“What’s the difference?” Kaminari asked.
Bakugou ignored him. “Okay, close your eyes,” he said. He started painting the yellow on Kaminari’s face. “This is such a waste,” he muttered.
“Pika pika,” Kaminari said happily. Bakugou rolled his eyes.
“Deku, pass me that glass,” he said.
“This one?” Midoriya held out a cup.
“Yeah.” Bakugou took it and put it on Kaminari’s cheek, tracing it with a lip liner. He did the same to the other cheek and filled it in with orange face paint.
“Pikachu’s cheeks are red,” Kaminari said.
“If I put red on, it’ll mix with yellow and make orange. I need orange as a base so the red doesn’t lighten too much,” Bakugou explained. Then he went over the cheeks in red. “You look like a fucking clown, by the way.”
“Good,” Kaminari said. “I am a clown, so it fits.”
“Hair time,” Bakugou said. “Normally, if I were using a bunch of products I’d do your hair first, but you just want butterfly clips so I can just do that.”
“Cool,” Kaminari said, nodding.
“Stop moving your head.” When Kaminari stilled, Bakugou clipped some colorful clips into his hair. “There. All done. Deku, come here.”
Midoriya took his seat in the chair. “You said you’re doing a skull for me,” he said.
Bakugou nodded. “Yeah, I am,” he said. “Hold still.” He started painting on Midoriya’s face.
“People are asking you questions in the livestream,” the green-haired boy said.
“I usually answer questions while I work,” Bakugou said. “I’m not looking at the screen though, so I can’t see. Read some out loud.”
“Okay. Uh, one asks if we all go to UA. Yep, we do! Kacchan and I have been friends for a while. He’s dating Kirishima, the red-haired one. And Mina and Denki are his good pals.” Midoriya paused. “People are excited about the boyfriend reveal,” he told Bakugou.
“Good for them,” Bakugou said. To the camera, he said, “Any sexual comments about us will get you blocked.”
“This person’s asking if they can pay you to do their makeup,” Midoriya said.
“They can private message me and we can work out a place and time,” Bakugou said. “But yes, that is a thing I can do.”
“Oh, someone donated some yen!” Midoriya said.
“I’ll look back through and see who donated later,” Bakugou said, “so I can add them to the raffle. And shout them out on my next video. Deku, stop fucking moving.”
“Sorry.” Midoriya tried to stay still. “The brush tickles.”
“I don’t care.” Bakugou continued answering questions as he did Midoriya’s makeup. “There,” he finally said. “All done. Ei, your turn. Best for last.”
“Sweet,” Kirishima said. He hopped into the chair.
“I’ll do your hair first,” Bakugou said. “I’ll just put it in a ponytail. You brush your hair, right, Ei?”
“You’re supposed to brush it?” Kirishima asked. “No, I’m just kidding. Of course I brush my hair. Who doesn’t?”
“I don’t,” Kaminari said.
“You’re an outlier,” Bakugou shot back. “Alright, then I’m just gonna use my brush on you, since we share a lot of shit anyway. But-”
“But you should never share hairbrushes with people who aren’t your family or already sharing things with you,” Kirishima interrupted, looking at the camera. “Specifically, only intimate relationships. And even then, you should have your own hairbrush for everyday use. Shared brushes are for touch-ups.”
Bakugou smiled. “Exactly,” he said. He brushed out Kirishima’s hair. “And even then, I clean my brush frequently, and I’ll clean it again after you all leave.”
“Sweet,” Kirishima said. “Don’t use hairspray, please, Bakubro. I don’t like how it feels.”
Bakugou nodded. “I can use gel,” he said.
“Sounds good,” Kirishima replied. “Do you have tips for your viewers if they don’t like gel?”
Bakugou thought for a moment. “Water,” he said. “It won’t help with flyaways after it dries out, but it’ll help flatten the hair and make sure there aren’t any lumps. Flyaways can be pinned back, or you can use a clean dryer sheet. Hairspray or gel is always the most effective though. But you don’t want those in overnight. It’s not good for the hair.”
“Dryer sheet?” Kirishima asked. “Really?”
“Yeah,” Bakugou nodded. He finished putting Kirishima’s hair up. “Makeup time. Have you moisturized?”
“Yeah, skin care is super manly.”
“We can get right to the makeup, then.” He used the same warm look on Kirishima as he had in his last video. “Do you want lip stuff?” he asked.
“Sure,” Kirishima nodded.
Bakugou took a red lip crayon and did Kirishima’s lips. “There,” he said. “Damn, you look good.”
“Aw, thank you,” Kirishima smiled. “I agree.”
Bakugou looked to the camera. “Well, that’s all. Thanks so much for watching. Sorry it was a bit off today, this was really a surprise to everyone. See ya next time! Boom!” He ‘punched’ the camera, turning the livestream off as his fist got close.
He turned to look at his friends. “I hate all of you,” he said.
Mina grinned. “We love you, too.”