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Remus turned another page in his book as he sat by the fire in the library, taking advantage of the quiet to try and finish at least a chapter. It was Christmas Eve; the house had been bustling with children and singing baubles and festivities the entire day, but now the house was nearly silent as everyone, full to bursting with the delicious and completely excessive dinner Molly had cooked up, settled down for the night. Molly had retired early to bed, the Weasley children were upstairs being suspiciously quiet, and Sirius and Harry were talking in the kitchen; Remus had made his exit in order to give them some time alone. As he took another sip of the ominously strong mulled wine Sirius had insisted he take with him upstairs, he heard a distant thud and the muffled sounds of a female voice softly cursing in the hallway.
“Hermione?” he called. His former student had been down to the library earlier, and they’d chatted pleasantly for a few minutes before she lugged several thick tomes with her up to her room. He thought maybe she’d come back down for some more reading material for whatever research she was working on now. He marked his place in his book just as the door opened slowly; his heart leapt in his chest as Tonks cautiously peeked her head around the frame, her face lighting up as she caught sight of him.
“Wotcher, Remus!” She entered the room, carrying several large bags; she shut the door and leaned against it momentarily before shrugging off her winter cloak and Auror robes, throwing them haphazardly on the sofa nearest to the door. Remus hadn’t seen her since the night he’d promised Sirius he would talk to her about his feelings for her. She was supposed to come to dinner a couple of days prior, but she had been called into an extra shift at the Ministry and that pattern had continued until tonight. The day she was originally supposed to come by, he had spent the entire day mentally preparing what he would say to her, only to feel slightly deflated when she’d owled to let them know she wouldn’t be able to stop by after all. Sirius had caught him in the hallway just today, making him promise that he wouldn’t lose his nerve and that he would still do something about “the situation,” as Sirius shiftily called it. Remus reassured him that he would and that he even had an idea of how he might go about it, but any carefully laid plans he may have had fled his head when he took in the sight of the witch before him.
She was wearing a large, fluffy forest green sweater over dark jeans and knee-high brown boots; large red bauble earrings swung from her earlobes, and her hair, pulled back into a soft braid, was a sort of white gold, shot through with some other iridescent color - silver, perhaps? - that shimmered just so whenever the soft strands caught the firelight.
“Hi, Tonks,” he greeted her, his mouth suddenly dry. “I didn’t even hear the front door. Are you...are you dressed as a Christmas tree, perchance?”
“I am!” she exclaimed, delighted. “You’re the first one to get it! All the blokes at work had to say is that they like the blonde better than my ‘usual.’” She rolled her eyes. “I’m assuming they mean the pink by my “usual,” as if I care what those tossers think. This isn’t blonde, though, it’s clearly-”
“Gold, for the star on top,” he replied, smiling. “Very nicely done, the shimmers are a nice touch. It looks - you look lovely. And not that my opinion matters either, but I think the pink suits you quite well.” He looked down at his book and fiddled with his bookmark, suddenly embarrassed. He was slightly pleased to notice a faint pink blush spread across her cheeks as she beamed at him, although he wasn’t entirely sure her nose wasn’t just pink from the cold.
She dropped the bags she had been holding in a heap on the floor. “Your opinion does matter, you know. I don’t let it bother me when they’re idiots about my morphing at work, but I’m glad you like the pink. I’m not interrupting you by the way, am I?” She nodded at the book he was still clutching.
“Oh, not at all.” He set it down on the side table and cleared his throat, suddenly feeling a swoop of nerves in his stomach. Conversation between them had always been so easy, but since the other night he now just felt incredibly self-conscious. Still, something about the way she smiled at him, though it made his stomach turn over, gave him a quiet confidence at the same time.
“It’s so quiet. I did my best to creep in here because I thought maybe everyone was asleep already, practically had to do cartwheels down the hall to avoid that fucking umbrella stand. Has everyone gone to bed?”
“Sirius is downstairs, if you wanted to see him. I left him and Harry alone for a bit, I figured they’d want to catch up. Harry doesn’t get to spend much time with his godfather and Sirius has been so happy to have him around for a few days. Molly’s in bed and the younger Weasleys are - er - they followed the twins upstairs, which is to say I don’t quite know what they’re doing, but I’d like to leave it at that so that I can plead full ignorance whenever Molly asks me about whatever trouble they cause next.” As if on cue, there was suddenly a loud thump on one of the floors above them followed by peals of distant laughter. He glanced up at the ceiling, alarmed. “Case in point, I’m going to leave that well enough alone. Anyway, I didn’t think we’d see you till after Christmas.”
“Neither did I. Work’s been insane,” she groaned, flopping down in the armchair across from him. “But I wanted to stop by to drop off some gifts since I’ll be at my parents’ tomorrow. You’re bringing Molly and the kids to St. Mungo’s tomorrow, yeah?”
He nodded. “Alastor and I are, yes. It’ll be good to see Arthur.”
“He was doing alright when I saw him. He was in good spirits, you know how Arthur is. And he's looking better day by day, thank Merlin.” She closed her eyes for a minute, sighing softly and sinking back into the cushions as the firelight flickered across her face. “It’s bloody freezing out there tonight, this fire feels amazing.”
“Would you like some mulled wine to help warm you up? At least, that’s what Sirius is calling it. He’s added so many other ‘secret ingredients’ that I’m fairly certain wine is no longer the main component of the beverage.” He conjured a glass for her. “He sent me up here with this entire flagon, and I’m not brave enough to attempt finishing it by myself.”
She laughed. “Something tells me I should absolutely not drink that, but what friend would I be to leave you alone to be poisoned by Sirius’ attempt at good cheer?” She took a tentative sip as he passed her the glass, pulling a face as she coughed. “Christ, that is awful. I think that whatever ingredients he’s added have been sitting in the cellar of this house for longer than either of us has been alive. Or our parents, even. Is the secret ingredient petrol, by any chance? Or perhaps dragon bile?"
He chuckled. “I apologize in advance if you have the worst hangover of your life tomorrow morning. It may take only one glass to achieve horrific results.”
“Cheers, then,” she said, clinking her glass against his. She managed to take another sip without incident and turned to glance at the tree in the corner, the fairies sparkling. “Where did Dung get this tree, anyway? You went with him to pick it up, didn’t you?”
“I did. But he asked me to stand on the corner and - er - serve as a lookout as he went down the street we were on to get the tree from his friend. He came back running as fast as he could while lugging behind him a tree and a sack in which, I presume, the poor fairies were contained; he was looking over his shoulder and shouting at me to ‘apparate on ahead,’ so I honestly figured it was just best not to ask lest we lose our chance at having a real Christmas tree.”
“That’s generally the best policy when dealing with Dung. The less you know, the better. The fairies are quite a nice touch, though, glad they survived their ordeal in Dung’s sack. I suppose I should get those under the tree.” She jerked her head towards the bags she had left scattered on the floor. “Meant to swing by my parents’ house and have mum help me with the wrapping as I’m absolutely awful at gift wrap, but I haven’t had time the past few days to go anywhere besides the Ministry and my flat, so my presents unfortunately look a bit grotesque.” Setting her wine down, she got back to her feet and started sorting through various parcels she pulled from the bags; they were indeed quite terribly wrapped with garishly colorful wrapping paper. “I had absolutely no clue what to get Sirius, but I remember him going on and on about those pork scratchings I brought to drinks that one time, so I got him a variety pack of a bunch of different muggle snacks, thought maybe he’d enjoy trying some different things, and then if he has favorites I can do some more snack runs for him.” She was frowning at one of the larger bags, looking suddenly uncertain. “I thought he’d be easy to please, but that doesn’t seem quite enough now. I got him a book on hippogriff grooming too, figured Beaky might like that. D’you think that’s enough?”
“He’ll be thrilled,” Remus assured her. “He’d love anything coming from you. And Buckbeak will thank you as well, I’m sure.”
“Great.” She set aside a particularly lumpy package, shooting a hopeful grin at him over her shoulder. “And seeing as I’ve already dashed apart your hopes of a peaceful evening of reading, perhaps I can give you your present now?”
“Oh--” he felt suddenly nervous again. This meant he would have to give her his gift, and he had already gotten comfortable with the idea that he would have a few more days to mentally prepare himself before seeing her again. He noticed she was still watching him expectantly. “Yes, erm - I have something for you, too. Let me go get it.” He got out of his seat, wincing at the way his knees cracked. “I’ll be just a minute.”
As he quietly made his way back down the stairs after grabbing the small package from his room, he heard soft music coming from beyond the library door, which he had left ajar. He came back into the room to see her fiddling with the radio, humming along slightly off key. She started slightly when she heard him close the door, looking slightly bashful. “Would you mind if I have this on? I love listening to muggle Christmas carols on Christmas Eve. Childhood nostalgia and all that.”
“Of course not, that would be lovely.” He felt almost shy again in her presence, which in turn made him feel rather foolish. “I’ve always enjoyed the carols, too. Christmas was my favorite as a child, and so the entire month of December, my mum used to sing some of the older ones to me before I went to sleep. She was a muggle so she’d grown up with them.” He sat back down in his chair; she was looking at him with those dark eyes of hers, and he was not quite sure why he told her that.
“That’s sweet. Do you still see...is your mum…” she trailed off as she rejoined him in front of the fire, a string quartet’s rendition of Greensleeves playing softly in the background.
“No, my mother died when I was nineteen. Cancer. Dad’s alive but I don’t...I don’t see him as often as I likely should.”
“I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked, that was stupid,” she said hurriedly. “I’ve just...never really heard you talk about your parents before, but I should have known not to-”
“You have nothing to be sorry for,” he reassured her, smiling. “It’s been a long time. Plus, I’m glad to be here for Christmas; someone’s got to keep Sirius from poisoning everyone else with this monstrous wine.”
“I mean honestly, what’s wrong with sticking to regular old mulled wine? The recipe’s lasted centuries for a reason. Did he add gin to this?”
“I’ve no idea, he mentioned something about ‘extra holiday cheer’ when I requested further information as to what he was providing me before I ingested it.”
Tonks laughed. “So speaking of holiday cheer - the real kind, not Sirius' poisonous kind - can I give you my present for you now? Sorry to be so eager, but I love giving gifts.” She handed him the lumpy package he had seen her set aside earlier.
“You didn’t have to get me anything, you know.”
Tonks rolled her eyes. “Okay, but you got me something, didn’t you?” She gestured towards the gift Remus had set down on the table between them.
“Yes, but-”
“And friends give each other gifts?”
“Yes, but-”
“No buts. I wanted to get you something. I thought of you right away when I came across it.” She was watching him closely now. “Go ahead, open it.”
He carefully loosened one of the many pieces of tape that were haphazardly slapped across the seams of the neon wrapping paper, looking up when he heard a snort of laughter. “What?”
“I’m sorry, it’s just - the way you open your presents is so you,” she said, her smile growing wider. “I just tear into mine, now I feel downright uncivilized after watching you.”
“I wouldn’t want to ruin the beautiful work you’ve done here,” he replied, looking up at her with a teasing grin. "You clearly put much time and effort into the wrapping, I wouldn't dream of defiling it."
"Git," she replied, pressing her lips together against a smile. "Go on, then, no need to treat it like you're opening a kneazle kitten."
"Oh so that's not what you've gotten me, then?"
“I thought about it, but I figured Sirius sheds enough for you.” She let out another snort of laughter; he loved her laugh.
He continued to gently pull away the wrapping, neatly folding it and placing it to the side - earning him another one of those secret smiles she always gave him, although this one was accompanied by an eye-roll - until he was left with a smooth and slightly worn box on his lap. It had a comfortable weight to it, and it was made of chocolatey brown wood with tarnished gold hinges. He pause, fingers brushing over the worn clasp on the front of the box.
“Is this-?”
“Open it.” She was watching him closely, almost holding her breath. He lifted the lid to find one of the most beautiful chess sets he had ever laid eyes on. He pulled out a knight piece, marveling at the intricately carved horse’s head. He looked up at Tonks to see her still watching him with a slightly apprehensive smile.
“Nymphadora -”
“Don’t call me Nymphadora, Remus,” she said softly, and without much conviction at all.
“You didn’t have to - this is beautiful.” His throat felt tight. “You shouldn’t have - this must be - how much -”
“I found it in a second-hand shop,” she said hurriedly, “so don’t - I don’t want you to get all weird about - you know, the cost or whatever. But I was looking for something else in this shop and I saw that and I remembered you said you hate playing with the set Sirius has here because the pawns don’t listen to you, and I know you prefer muggle chess anyway.” She swallowed, the firelight dancing in her dark eyes as she looked at him. “And I saw that set and I immediately thought of you and...well, I hope you like it.”
“I love it,” he said quietly, picking up another piece - remnant flecks of gold at the top of the queen’s crown suggesting that at one time, the pieces had been painted. “This is really - thank you, Tonks.”
She gave him a crooked grin. “Not that you needed any help considering how bloody awful I am at chess, but now that you’ve got a muggle set, you can thrash me properly. No magic and mutinous pawns for me to rely on. Just pure strategy, which I lack in spades when it comes to chess, it seems.”
“I truly can’t thank you enough, Nymphadora. This is beautiful. Thank you so much.”
“It’s really my pleasure, Remus. I'm so glad you like it.” She was definitely blushing now. He carefully set the box back on the table and handed her his parcel, neatly wrapped in that morning’s Daily Prophet.
“My gift for you isn’t much, I’m afraid. It’s a little less - erm - I didn’t know...”
“Stop, Remus, you know I’ll love it,” she said brightly. She violently ripped off the wrapping and let it fall to the floor, giving a small gasp. “An Adam Dalgliesh book! I’ve been looking for this one for ages! Where’d you find it?”
“A second-hand bookshop I frequent quite often. I’m friendly with one of the fellows who runs the till, he helped me hunt it down. I remembered you mentioning a while ago you were trying to build out your collection.” One of their first stakeouts together, in fact, when she had pulled a dog-eared and tattered novel out of her satchel - stolen from her dad’s bookshelf, she explained, and she wanted to make her way through the rest of them so she and her father could discuss them together. But he didn’t particularly feel like mentioning that he had remembered that extraordinarily tiny detail from one of the first times they had spoken to each other.
“Dad’ll be dead pleased, he’s been on me to find this one.” He smiled at the way her face lit up as she flipped through the book, but felt his heart leap to his throat as she paused, brow crinkling in confusion. “Oh look, someone’s left a note in here...” She pulled out the small scrap of parchment he had stuck between the pages, her eyes widening as she read it. She looked up at him suddenly.
“Yes,” she said immediately.
“Yes?”
“Yes. Of course, yes.” She bit her lip, reading the parchment again. A full-blown grin now broke out across her face. “What were you saying again about your gift not being much? You daft man, this is the best gift I’ve gotten yet. Did you seriously think I would say no? Of course I’d love to go on a date with you.”
He rubbed the back of his neck, relaxing slightly as he felt relief creep in. He hadn’t realized he’d been holding his breath. “I mean clearly I was hoping you’d say yes, but I - I don’t know. I was still...afraid I’d misread the situation, perhaps.”
“Does this have anything at all to do with our game the other night? When Hestia and the rest of them were here?” she asked, her eyes glinting. “I was afraid perhaps that I was a bit too obvious.”
“I will say that that game of yours led to a conversation with Sirius where he - er - tried to prod some sense into me, I guess you could say. Once he was through throwing a fit because he didn’t win, of course.”
She beamed at him. "Well, I'm glad. I was gearing up to ask you myself but I didn't want to scare you off."
He chuckled. "That's what Sirius said. And he said - he said it might be a pleasant surprise if I asked, as well, so I hope you are pleasantly surprised."
"Well, I'm very glad you asked."
"Me, too. So when’s your next free night, then?” he replied, hoping he didn’t look as stupid as he felt with a wide smile plastered on his face.
“Day after Boxing Day. I’ve got the entire night free.”
“Let’s meet here at eight?”
“Yes, perfect.” She was still beaming. He was suddenly struck by a desire to kiss her. He reminded himself that she had just agreed to go on a date with him - Remus Lupin, a 35 year old destitute werewolf - and even that was beyond what he could have hoped for. He had to remain realistic; his stomach was leaping at the confirmation that perhaps she did have some sort of feelings for him, but he knew that that could so easily change. And just because she had agreed to have spend one evening with him certainly didn’t mean she wanted him to touch her, did it?
He glanced at his watch to distract himself. “I know it’s late, but would you want to help me break in this set with a match?” He rested his hand on the chess box.
“I’d love to. I’ll have time for a bit of a lie-in tomorrow morning before I have to go see my parents, so I don’t have to go any time soon.”
He arranged the board - taking black for himself, as he always did, although he would never tell her he insisted on taking black so that she would be granted first-move advantage, though he suspected she knew his intentions anyway.
They were comfortably silent as they played, the only sounds accompanying their game being the soft crackling of the fire and the quiet Christmas carols coming from the radio. Remus smiled as Tonks hummed one of the tunes distractedly under her breath as she studied the board.
The peace was only broken when the door burst open and Sirius appeared a half hour or so later.
"Wotcher, Sirius," Tonks said, looking up from the chessboard to grin at her cousin.
"Tonks! I thought we weren't going to see you till after Christmas!"
"I know, I didn't either, but I had some free time tonight, so I thought I'd stop by and let Remus thrash me at chess."
Sirius threw himself in the chair nearest to them, peering at the board between the two of them. "Is that a new chess set?"
"Yes, Tonks was kind enough to gift me a set of my own for Christmas," Remus replied, smiling across the board at the witch in question. She smiled back, a faint blush staining her cheeks.
"And what's wrong with my set?" Sirius asked, affronted.
"Your pawns are horrible. They never listen to me."
"Ah, right. Likely because of the whole werewolf thing," Sirius said offhandedly. "We did find that set in my mother's house, after all. Makes sense that even the most innocuous of objects might inherit her stance regarding the 'half-breeds' living under her roof."
"Oi, don't use that word," Tonks said rather absent-mindedly as she slid her bishop forward on the board. "Oh, bollocks -"
Remus paused in the middle of replacing her bishop with his rook. "It's okay, that one wasn't very apparent. You can take back your move and try again, if you'd like."
"Oh come on, Moony. Show no mercy, you old softie," Sirius said exasperatedly. "You never let me take back my moves when we play. Why is that, I suppose?"
"I'm just saying that I don't mind if Tonks -"
"It's disgusting watching the two of you flirt over the chess board, of all things, instead of bringing it to the bedroom like normal people," Sirius replied, reaching over said board to grab the flagon of mulled wine and refilling the glass he'd brought in with him to the library. "You ask Tonks out on a date yet, Moony?"
"He did!" Tonks replied brightly. "I said yes, obviously."
Remus rolled his eyes, feeling his cheeks heat up. "Jesus christ, Padfoot," he muttered. "And if I hadn't yet?"
"Then I would say I'm giving you the swift kick in the arse that you need in order to do so," Sirius replied. He lifted his goblet up, spilling a few droplets of wine onto the worn carpet. "Cheers to you two, then. Where are you taking her, Moony?"
"I'm - er -" Remus hadn't quite gotten that far yet. He hadn't wanted to get his hopes up about her saying yes, and so he'd held off on actually allowing himself to think of any potential plans until he was sure that she would actually be interested in doing anything of the sort with him. But now that Sirius had asked the question, he was seized by a sudden surge of panic. Would she expect a date at a nice restaurant? He knew that she knew about his money situation, and she didn't seem like the type to care - it was one of the many reasons he liked her - but would she change her mind once she realized that he really couldn't just easily bring her out on a date like any other potential partner could? That he wasn't the type of date she'd want to be seen with in public?
"I'll be happy with absolutely anything we end up doing," Tonks cut in cheerfully. She smiled at him, and he realized she must have noticed his discomfort.
"I'm sure you will," Sirius replied, waggling his eyebrows at them suggestively. Remus shook his head slightly, frowning as he looked back at the chess board.
"You know, Padfoot, I must say that it was rather peaceful up until you arrived, and now -"
"Git. Harry went to bed, and now I'm bored." He took another swig of his wine, and Remus felt his annoyance at Sirius soften. Sirius had been in extremely high spirits with Harry around and a full house for the holidays; Remus was starting to worry about the inevitable come down and crash that would occur once the holidays were over and everyone had gone their separate ways, but for now, he supposed he could do his part to ensure that Sirius had a nice week, and sniping at him over his (admittedly immature) innuendos and snide comments about Tonks wasn't going to do either of them any favors.
Remus looked up to notice Tonks watching him; her eyes met his, and when her eyes darted back over to Sirius, he realized she must have been thinking along similar lines. "If you're bored, Sirius, I could use some help over here. Not that I'm not accustomed to being completely and utterly obliterated in chess, but this game in particular is wounding my pride. I could use your eye to see how I get my queen out of the tough spot she's found herself in."
Sirius grinned, scooting his chair closer to their table. "There's nothing I enjoy more than seeing Moony actually lose at something, so let's see what we have here."
Remus rolled his eyes again, but as he watched Sirius and Tonks bicker over her pawn strategy, and noticing that her hand was still resting gently on the book that he had given her, he had to admit to himself that this was likely the best Christmas he'd experienced in a very long time, and he allowed himself a moment of warm gratitude and comfort in this fact as he leaned back in his chair, sipping his wine and smiling at Tonks when she looked up to meet his gaze over the chess board.
Remus tried his best to ignore the flutter of nerves that had taken up in his stomach as he waited in the library for Tonks to arrive at the time they had agreed upon. Sirius was, surprisingly, leaving him alone; he was preoccupied with Harry, but Remus suspected that Sirius also knew how apprehensive Remus was about his upcoming date - was he even allowed to call it that? - with Tonks, even though Remus hadn't admitted to it out loud. Before disappearing into the drawing room with his godson, Sirius had clapped him on the shoulder and with a rather uncharacteristically warm and sincere smile wished Remus a nice night.
Remus stood suddenly as he heard the front door quietly open, making his way to the entryway to see Tonks coming in through the front door. She beamed as soon as she saw him, her plum colored coat somehow brightening up what was perhaps the gloomiest front hallway in all of Britain. "Wotcher, Remus!" she whispered, sidestepping Mrs. Black's portrait and the umbrella stand. "Are we leaving right from here, then?"
"Yes, let's get out of here before Sirius' mum decides to disturb the entire house," Remus said quietly, following Tonks right back out the front door.
As soon as the heavy door was closed behind them, Tonks grinned at him and threw her arms around his neck, giving him a brief yet tight hug in greeting, much to his surprise. "So where are we off to, then?" she asked breathlessly as soon as she pulled back, her eyes twinkling with excitement. "I have to say I've been absolutely intrigued ever since I got your note about dressing warmly."
"It's a surprise," he said lightly. He still felt nervous, but he couldn't help but smile at her outward enthusiasm. The dull edge of worry started eating away at his own excitement again, however, as they made their way down the front steps and headed towards the alleyway that held the nearest safe apparition point. "I do hope...Tonks, I wish I could take you to a - to a nice restaurant or something, but I just -"
"Remus, stop," she said firmly. "I'll love whatever we do, alright? I promise. Honestly, we could just sit in the Grimmauld library and eat crisps in front of the fire and I'd be happy as long as you're there." She reached out to squeeze his hand, and he was pleasantly surprised when she didn't let go, holding his hand in hers as they continued to walk to the alleyway. The leaping feeling in his stomach now had slightly less to do with nerves, he thought.
They reached the apparition point, and he turned to face her. "Are you alright if I sidelong apparate you there?"
"I trust you," she replied. He reached down to take her other hand and then apparated them to their destination.
He realized that Tonks had squeezed her eyes shut just before they apparated; now, opening her eyes now, they widened as she looked around them. Remus noted dimly that she was still holding one of his hands in hers. "Oh wow, I have no idea where we are but this is absolutely gorgeous!"
They were standing on a small hill in a sparse copse of birches, overlooking a frozen pond that was nestled amongst another larger thicket of trees. "We're relatively near the North Pennines, if you're the type of person who'll need to know as much as you can about our geographical coordinates before you can enjoy yourself," he explained as he started to lead her down the hill, their boots crunching into the snow.
"You know me, I'm an Auror," she replied, grinning. "Knowing as much about my situation as possible is my career. But I love a good surprise." He felt some of his apprehension melt away as she continued to turn her head left and right, taking in the wintry landscape with wide eyes. "This really is gorgeous. I forget how much I enjoy the snow now that I'm living full-time in London. My mate Penny and I used to nick trays from the Great Hall when we were at Hogwarts whenever it snowed, and we'd use them to go sledging on this little hill we found near the forest. Nearly killed myself many times over running into trees, of course, but it was great fun."
"Well, had I known your affinity for danger and for sledging, I would have tried to arrange that," Remus replied, smiling slightly. "It seems we've missed an opportunity to ruin one of the Black family's best antique serving trays. So unfortunately you'll have to settle for my favorite winter activity. But it should hopefully produce a satisfactory amount of danger for you to still enjoy yourself." He felt a small surge of pleasure as she snickered. They'd reached the edge of the small pond, and Remus brushed the snow off a nearby tree stump, gesturing at Tonks to sit on it. She did so, raising her eyebrows when he crouched in front of her. "May I?" He laid a hand on her right boot, pulling his wand out of his pocket with his other.
Her eyes suddenly lit up as they made their way between her boot in his hand and the frozen pond. "If you're about to do what I think you're about to do...are you absolutely certain you meant to ask me on this date instead of someone else? Only because I can't promise you won't sustain any bodily injury if you find yourself in my vicinity while I attempt to ice skate."
"Wouldn't have asked anyone else," he replied, smiling up at her as he tapped his wand to her boot and muttered a charm. He did the same to her other boot, then stood and helped her to her feet. He swallowed when she briefly grabbed his shoulders to steady herself as she stood on the newly added blades on her boots, grinning up at him. "Have you gone ice skating before?" he asked, reaching down to quickly charm his own shoes before they started to hobble together towards the pond.
"Oh, once or twice; I might need you to help me, though," she replied. They reached the edge of the pond, and Remus pulled his wand back out before they stepped out on the ice, concentrating on the smooth surface before them as he cast a cushioning charm. "Don't trust me not to fall, Lupin?" Tonks shot at him, a mischievous look in her eyes.
"Should I give my honest answer?" he replied. She laughed, stepping out onto the ice tentatively. "Hopefully that charm should hold, but -"
"And if not, I'll just use you to break my fall," she interjected, shooting a grin over her shoulder.
He stepped out on the ice after her, putting a steadying hand on her elbow as she wobbled slightly. "Is this okay?"
"Yeah, maybe we do a loop or two around the pond and I hold your arm the entire way? I'll try my best not to bring the two of us crashing down, but no promises," she said.
They slowly and cautiously made their way around the pond several times; Tonks clung tightly to his arm, and Remus had to work extremely hard not to think about how warm she felt pressed up against his side. They had a few close calls, and the one time Tonks tried to let go of his arm and make it on her own she rather resembled a baby giraffe attempting to make its first steps; but surprisingly, they did not fall once.
"Wanna race?" Tonks asked suddenly. His eyebrows shot up in surprise; she was still clinging to his arm with both of her own, her toes pointing slightly inwards as her legs wobbled and she tried to remain standing on the ice. She was grinning up at him, and he was suddenly struck - not for the first time - by how beautiful she was. Nose reddened by the cold, dark eyes twinkling up at him underneath bits of her pink fringe that were poking out from her canary yellow beanie, he was struck again by the intense desire to kiss her. He quickly looked down, trying his best not to look at her lips.
"Er - no offense, Tonks, but are you quite sure you're -"
"What? Afraid you'll lose, Professor?" She smirked at him, and he couldn't help but look at her lips now. She must have noticed, because she suddenly bit her full bottom lip in a far too enticing way, and he had to look away again as her smirk grew wider.
"I'm more afraid you'll lose a limb, quite honestly. Or at least a finger or two," he replied teasingly, trying to ignore the butterflies that seemed to take up residence in his stomach whenever she was standing so close to him and looking up into his face like she was now. She dropped his arm suddenly, straightening up with the slightest unsteadiness as she moved a further away from him.
"Mmm. I suppose we'll just have to see what happens. Two loops around, then, first person to pass that bush right on the edge there is the winner. Deal?"
"Er - deal. Perhaps I should cushion our extremities as well," he said, only half-jokingly. "That way your knees and elbows won't -"
"I'm not too worried about my knees and my elbows, but you can cushion my bum all you want, as long as you use your hands," she replied, winking at him before suddenly taking off at the speed of light. He gaped after her for a moment, feeling his cheeks heat up before he pushed off after her.
"I thought - wait, you said you barely knew how to ice skate, Tonks!" he called out as he gained on her. Her posture was markedly different now; her body was leaning forward slightly, no sign of the unsteadiness she'd displayed earlier while clinging to his arm. Her skates propelled her smoothly across the ice with sure, precise strokes.
She glanced back only for a second, not losing her balance in the slightest as she did so. "I lied because I wanted to hold your hand the whole way 'round," she shouted back at him cheerfully before her feet started cutting shorter, sharper strokes, propelling her forward even faster. Remus gaped after her again before picking up speed himself.
"No need to cheat, I might have held your hand if you'd simply asked," he replied. His lips curled into a smile, the cold air hitting his face almost painfully as he gained on her. "Lucky for me -" he heard a shout of indignation as he overtook her, not daring to sacrifice a bit of speed to look behind him at what he knew would be a satisfying look of outrage on her face - "I have a good nine or ten inches of leg on you."
They had passed the bush marking the start and end of their race once already, and Remus could see it coming up again as he rounded the side of the pond. He could hear the frantic scraping of Tonks' skates behind him, but he didn't dare slow down or try to look behind him. He was nearly there, the finish line bush two or three meters away, when suddenly -
"Oh no, you don't!" he heard Tonks crow. He turned his head slightly to the side just in time to see a blurry flash of purple, pink, and yellow before a small body collided with his. He let out a small yelp as he felt one of his skates catch on the other, and then suddenly he was tumbling to the ground.
He landed flat on his back, feeling the cushioning charm over the ice give only slightly; he held a small moment of gratitude towards his past self for casting such a charm. He barely had time to think any further, however, before he saw another blur of purple above him.
"Oof!" His breath left his lungs in one whoosh as Tonks landed directly on top of him, her forehead narrowly missing smacking into his chin.
She lifted her head, panting slightly as she looked down into his eyes. She grinned. "Sorry if that hurt at all, but I just couldn't let you win." She didn't look very sorry.
He arched an eyebrow at her, trying desperately - and rather failing - to ignore the fact that she was still laying on top of him, her body warm against his. Their legs were tangled together, and a stray pink curl had escaped her beanie and was tickling his chin. "Seeing as neither of us has passed the finish line, it's not as if you have exactly won, either. So I'm afraid we've found ourselves at an impasse."
"Okay. Let's just say you won."
"Interesting you should say that, as you might have saved us both the trouble and simply refrained from tackling me. Then I really would have won."
"No, I mean - I didn't want you to win before, but I've changed my mind," she replied, sounding rather breathless all of a sudden.
"And why's that?"
"Winner's prize. I want to give you your winner's prize."
"I don't believe we ever agreed on a prize. I thought it was just the pride of winning?"
"Well, I have one in mind, and it's better than just pride. And I think you deserve to receive it. So I'm declaring you winner."
"And what's my prize, Nymphadora?" He was extremely aware now of how close her face was to his, of the way her body fit perfectly against his. He blinked as her nose brushed against his, and vaguely noticed her lips curve into a smile.
"This is your prize, Remus." And then she lowered her head to close the slight gap in between them, pressing her mouth to his.
Her kiss started off gentle; her lips were warm and soft, barely brushing against his own. She softly cupped his cheek with one hand, and he felt a slight tug on his collar as she grasped the lapel of his coat in her other. He brought his hands up to rest hesitantly on her waist, and she made a noise of encouragement, her lips parting now as she deepened the kiss. Remus was dimly aware of the cold, damp moisture from the ice below him starting to seep into his clothes, but he couldn't even find it within himself to mind as he focused on the feeling of Tonks' tongue exploring his mouth, her lips moving softly against his, and the small sighs that escaped her as he gently stroked his hands up and down her sides and before pressing them into her back to hold her body even more firmly against him.
After what felt like several glorious, far-too-short minutes, Tonks finally pulled back. "So how do you like your prize?" she asked breathlessly.
Remus swallowed, feeling slightly dazed. Her face was still extremely close to his, close enough that he could feel her warm breath against his lips; he had to work hard to focus on her eyes. "That was - that - I must say I liked it," he replied rather dumbly. She grinned at him, and he couldn't help but smile back. Suddenly, she rolled off of him and proceeded to try and stand up on the ice.
"Your entire back and bum are going to be soaked through now, sorry about that."
"Nothing a quick spell won't fix, and it was well worth it," he replied. He managed to get back to his own feet as Tonks was still scrambling on all fours, slipping about on the ice, and he held out a hand to help pull her up. "Are you hungry at all?"
"I did work up a bit of an appetite trying and failing to kick your arse in our race."
After a brief drying charm cast by Tonks at Remus' back (a charm that felt worryingly hot, and which Remus thought might have been dangerously close to setting his trousers on fire, though he opted not to mention this fear lest he ruin the mood) and after Remus restored their boots to their original bladeless forms, they headed back up the hill to the edge of the copse they had apparated into. Remus dropped a small rucksack from his shoulder and pulled out a blanket, spreading it on the ground before them and charming it to keep warm and dry before they sat down.
"I've brought some sandwiches - cheese and pickle, I hope that's alright? And some soup as well, I hope it's kept warm." Remus felt a brief flash of self-consciousness again as he pulled out the homemade meal he'd brought them, but it faded surprisingly quickly as Tonks eagerly took the sandwich and thermos he offered her. She sipped her soup, her eyes still gleaming as she looked around at the wintry scenery surrounding them.
They chatted easily as they ate their meal; Remus marveled at how comfortable he felt talking to Tonks, and he took pride in how often he was able to make her laugh. When they'd finished their sandwiches, Remus pulled another container out of the rucksack. "Hot cocoa?" he asked, holding the thermos out to her. "I was going to go with tea, but something about the snow puts me in the mood for hot cocoa. Or it did when I was younger, anyway. So I thought this might be a nice change." She hummed her agreement, and they took turns sipping out of the thermos, their fingers brushing against each other as they passed it back and forth.
“So how’d you find this place?” she asked conversationally, wiping a bit of chocolate off of her lips with the back of her hand.
“My childhood home is near here,” he explained. “Well, one of them. My mum was from Cardiff, so we spent the first few years of my life around there, but we...we moved around a lot, after I was bitten, because my parents were trying to keep it a secret from muggle and wizarding neighbors alike. And so this is one of the last places we settled on before I left for Hogwarts because it was...nice and remote. There's a cottage. I would have suggested we have our meal inside so we could be a little warmer, but…” he hesitated, before finishing quietly, “...it’s not in great shape. It's difficult to afford the upkeep, and it's...where I go to transform sometimes.”
She covered his hand with her own smaller one. “I’m happy being wherever you are, Remus. I think this is beautiful and the view is absolutely perfect.” She grinned up at him, wriggling slightly closer. “Plus, the cold gives me an excuse to completely and unabashedly disrespect your personal space.” He still couldn't believe that she was here, sitting in the snow and talking to him and sitting so close to him as if she didn't want to spend her time doing anything else. He turned to look at her, and realized it had gotten so dark he could barely make out her features; the sky was rather cloudy, threatening more snow, and so the moonlight that had illuminated the pond earlier had now dimmed. He shifted slightly to pull an empty jar out of the rucksack; muttering the charm under his breath, he quickly conjured shimmering bluebell flames in the jar before setting it into the snow in front of them so that they were bathed in the soft glow of the heat-less flames.
He turned to see Tonks looking at him intently; he felt his cheeks warm under her gaze. “Why are you looking at me like that?” he found himself asking before he could stop himself.
She laughed. “Because you’re amazing.”
He didn’t say anything for a several long moments. “Does it really not bother you?” he finally asked quietly. He knew that he didn’t need to explain what he was talking about.
“Do you want me to tell you the truth?” she replied. He felt his stomach drop. What else had he expected? Had he really thought there was a chance she truly did not care?
“Of course.” Yet his dread turned slightly to confusion as she shifted even closer to him, taking one of his hands in hers. She was pressed entirely against his side now; he stared down at his knees as she squeezed his hand lightly.
“Do you remember dinner after my very first meeting with the Order? When I somehow managed to spill the gravy and a flagon of wine all over the table at the same time?”
He gave a small chuckle. “Indeed I do.” He could see out of the corner of his eye that she was smiling slightly.
“Bloody fine way to make a first impression, that. But I remember everyone was making a fuss. Molly was trying to reassure me and make me feel better but I could tell that she was annoyed, Sirius was cracking some stupid joke and everyone else was laughing and I sort of just felt like that was exactly what they expected from this young rookie with the crazy hair.” She looked at him, face completely serious now. “You were the only one I felt wasn’t laughing at me,” she finished softly. “You were the first to help me clean it up, but not in a patronizing way, like I couldn’t handle myself. You were really just helping because it was the thing to do. You were smiling, but it wasn’t...I’ve had enough experience now where I can tell who’s laughing at my expense and who’s trying to make me feel better. I always laugh that stuff off myself, I wouldn’t survive if I couldn’t. I’m a right clumsy fuck. But it actually really bothers me, sometimes. Especially when I’m trying to make a good first impression. I think people doubt my abilities sometimes. And they don't take me seriously. Because I’m young and I wear ripped jeans and my hair in crazy colors and I trip over my feet all the time. But I’m capable.”
“You’re more than capable and people should absolutely take you seriously; I'm sorry you've had to deal with those who don't.”
She squeezed his hand again. “See? That’s exactly what I’m talking about. You were the only one in that moment who made me feel okay, who made me feel like I belonged and that I was still welcome and that I wasn’t a fool. And I had just met you.”
“You’re absolutely not a fool,” he replied. “But forgive me, Nymphadora, I...what does this have to do with my...with what I am?”
She took a deep breath. “When I found out later on that you’re a werewolf, my first thought was, ‘But he’s so nice.’”
“That’s...it’s normal to be surprised. And scared. And I need you to know that I absolutely won't blame you if you decide that you're still -”
She suddenly reached up, gently touching his cheek in order to turn his head to face hers. He looked down, trying to avoid her gaze. “Remus, hey,” she said softly, “I’m being honest because I like you. I really like you. But let me finish.” He looked her in the eyes now, startled by the sincere look on her face. “That was the first thing I thought. But then later that night, after I'd found out, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Not the fact that you’re a werewolf, but about my initial reaction. I was surprised at how nice you were, and I realized how fucked up that is. And then I felt horrible.”
“You shouldn't have felt horrible, it’s perfectly normal to think that way.”
“No, Remus, it’s fucked up,” she said firmly. “I realized that I shouldn’t be thinking ‘But he’s so nice.’ There shouldn’t be a ‘but’ there. It’s just that you’re so nice; that’s all there is to it. That was my first impression. My real first impression, before I knew about your condition. And learning about your condition shouldn’t change that - it doesn't change that. And now that I’ve gotten to know you better, I’m even more certain that it doesn’t change that. I meant what I said a couple minutes ago; you’re amazing. And anyone who doesn’t see that is a bloody fool.”
He smiled ruefully. “There are many out there who would disagree with you.”
“I’m not trying to downplay all the prejudice and other bullshit you face, and so I won't insult your intelligence by arguing with that. But that still makes them bloody fools. You have an illness. It's not your fault. You're a brilliant wizard, a devoted friend, and an integral part of the Order; you just happen to be sick."
"But it's - it's not - there must be some part of you that's bothered by it," he insisted. A small part of his brain was yelling at him to shut up; they'd been having such a nice time, why did he have to sabotage it now? But he just couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that she really didn't care; he had to admit that as much as he wanted to, he was afraid to let himself start to believe that she really meant all the things she was saying.
"Remus, I don't give a shit. I haven't for a long time now. You're an amazing person, and you've been an amazing friend, and I..." she faltered, sounding as if she were the one who felt self-conscious now. "Merlin, this is embarrassing to say but I said I would be honest. I've fancied you for ages. I tried not to be but I've been so obvious, half the Order has noticed and Kingsley keeps teasing me about it and just...the other night, with that game. With Hestia and Emmeline and all that. I was afraid I'd gone too far, you're so private and you're so nice to everyone and I thought maybe...well, I was relieved and thrilled when you gave me my Christmas present, I'll just say that." She nudged his shoulder with hers, turning to smile at him again. "And this might just be the best Christmas present I've ever gotten. So don't go overthinking things, alright? I really like you, Remus. I've had a wonderful time tonight and I'd quite like to do this again, if you'd like to."
Remus swallowed, feeling his stomach leap at the verbal confirmation that she felt the same way about him as he did her, that she wanted to spend even more time with him. "I'd - yes, of course I'd like to do this again, too," he replied, returning her smile.
It had started to snow again, and Remus was starting to feel the bite of the wind through his threadbare coat, the warming charms he'd cast finally starting to wear off; Tonks gave a little shiver, and so he stood, stretching slightly and wincing at the popping in his knees before holding out a hand to help her off the ground. "Perhaps we should head back before we freeze to death."
She grinned. "And what would Sirius do without his two favorite people to pester?"
And so, several minutes later, they found themselves standing on the front step of headquarters. Remus had thought of offering to apparate Tonks home first, but he hadn't wanted her to get the wrong idea, that he was expecting to be invited in - but he slightly awkward now as he hesitated in front of the door at Grimmauld, trying to decide how exactly he should invite her in. He knew it was the polite thing to do, but he also didn't want to push his luck - she'd spent all evening with him, and it was getting rather late. Would she really want to spend even more time with him?
Almost as if she'd read his mind, Tonks smiled up at him. "Would it be alright if I come in for a bit? Unless you'd wanted to go to sleep, of course, I know it's late. But I had a really nice time with you and I'm not quite ready to head home just yet. Perhaps we can share a nightcap?"
Remus swallowed, nodding quickly. "Yes - yes, of course, I'd like that." They both stepped quietly into the dark front hall of the foreboding old house, and he'd just managed to reset all of the security spells on the door when he suddenly found himself pushed up against said door as soon as he'd turned around. He looked down, startled, as Tonks pressed her body against his, her hands gripping the lapels of his jacket tightly. She jerked her head upwards, gesturing to something above them, her dark eyes glinting with mischief and...something else. He glanced up to see a sprig of mistletoe that had been hung directly above the front door - hung, no doubt, as it was throughout the rest of the house, by Sirius trying to cause festive drama amongst all of the Order members coming and going from headquarters. For some reason, though, Remus was fairly certain that this particular sprig had not been there when he and Tonks had left for their date.
"Mistletoe," Tonks said unnecessarily, directly meeting Remus' gaze again.
"That does ring a bell," he replied mildly. "I do believe there's something we're meant to do once we're caught under it?"
"I've heard we're supposed to kiss. Or that's what tradition dictates, anyway."
"I suppose we have to kiss, then," he replied with mock reluctance, feeling that flip in his stomach again at the way she was looking at him.
"Oh yes, I suppose we have to," she said, "we wouldn't want to mess with tradition, now, would we?"
"No, we wouldn't," he agreed. "Though you gave me my winner's prize earlier - and that was very generous of you, I must say - so would it be too bold of me to ask if I may kiss you this time?"
Her smile grew even wider. "It would certainly not be too bold, please do."
He lowered his head, softly pressing his lips against hers for the second time that evening. The gentleness didn't last long, however, and something felt different about this kiss. Tonks had her body pressed against his, but he felt her hands slip under his coat; they roamed over his chest, over his stomach, before she slid her hands down to hook her fingers into his belt loops. She pulled his hips flush against her, moaning quietly into his mouth as she did so. He ran his hands up her sides to tangle them in her hair, trying to pull her even closer to him, kissing her more deeply and hungrily than he could remember kissing anyone in an extremely long time. Their lips slid together, tongues clashing as she continued to make soft noises of pleasure against his mouth.
He felt her hands slide gently around his side, down a little further, and then suddenly, he couldn't hold back a groan of his own as Tonks squeezed his arse, pushing her body desperately against his. They were both still wearing their coats, and Remus was struck by the rather bold thought - the kind of thought that he usually tried to suppress - that they were both wearing far too much clothing, that he wanted to feel her body completely against his - he wanted to feel her skin against his - but of course, that would be far too much to wish for. He still couldn't quite believe that she was even kissing him like this. But not for the first time that evening, she surprised him.
"Remus," she gasped against his lips. "This is - if this is too forward, if it's too much, please tell me and I promise it's okay - but can I stay the night? With you?"
He pulled back only slightly, struck by what he could only describe as a look of desire in her eyes as she gazed up at him. Desire for him. "I - really? You would want that?"
"Of course I would. I really like you, Remus. And I happen to be very attracted to you, in case you haven't noticed." Her hands were warm on his lower back, and she nuzzled the collar of his shirt aside with her nose as she murmured these words against his skin, nipping lightly at his collarbone. He nearly felt dizzy with desire. "But only if you want this, too."
Remus closed his eyes, leaning his head back against the door and struggling to form a coherent thought as she kissed her way gently up his neck. "I...yes, I would like -"
They broke apart immediately at the sound of someone clearing their throat. Remus flushed as they whirled around and saw Sirius standing at the top of the stairs that led up from the kitchen, grinning at them while he leaned against the wall.
“No, no, please don’t stop on my account. I, for one, am greatly looking forward to informing my dear old hag of a mother that a blood-traitor and a werewolf are shagging under her roof. And nearly about to do the deed right in front of her portrait, from the looks of what I've just walked in on.”
Tonks snickered. “Please don’t, we don’t need the rest of the Order to find that out by way of the daily abuse she usually yells at us." Remus noted that even though they had sprang apart at the interruption, one of her hands had found its way to his lower back again underneath his coat. He marveled again at how casually and frequently she touched him - as if she didn't want to stop touching him.
"Oh, so you'd rather them find out when you two can't keep your hands off each other at the next Order meeting?" Sirius teased.
Tonks scoffed. "Don't insult Remus like that, he has restraint and an admirable sense of decorum." She grinned at Remus as he blushed. "I, on the other hand, cannot wait to -"
"Alright, alright, I don't need the sordid details regarding what you two are planning on doing to each other," Sirius cut in hastily. "Anyway," he gestured to the mistletoe, "I see that did the trick, then. Only I hope it doesn't have quite as strong an effect on the next person to walk through that door, as I believe Mad-Eye is due to drop off some documents tomorrow morning and I shudder to think of who might be caught under the mistletoe with him before they've had their morning coffee. Make sure you don't get up too early tomorrow, Moony, or that may make the second special snog you've gotten under that mistletoe and I daresay Mad-Eye's won't be nearly as pleasant."
Remus rolled his eyes. "Don't you have a godson to be corrupting, Padfoot?"
Sirius clucked his tongue. "In a hurry to get rid of me, are we?"
"We are, actually," Tonks shot back rather impatiently. "So if you'd be so kind as to -"
"Yes, yes, I'm leaving," Sirius drawled over his shoulder as he started to descend back down into the kitchen. "Remember the silencing charm, my dears, there are children and a certain Molly Weasley in the house." Remus winced slightly, but Tonks only laughed. She turned to him again as soon as they heard the door to the kitchen click shut.
"So how about it, Remus?" she asked, her eyes shining. "Like I said, if it's too soon, you can absolutely say no and that won't change anything - I had a lot of fun tonight, and I want to do this again no matter what, so I absolutely do not want you to feel pressured. But I -"
"Yes," he interrupted her, suddenly emboldened by the way she was looking at him, as if she actually desired him; by the way her hands were lightly stroking his sides again, by the way he felt completely and utterly intoxicated by her.
"Yes, you'd like me to stay? Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm absolutely sure. Let's go upstairs," he said.
"Let's go upstairs," she repeated breathlessly. "But first -" She leaned up to press her lips against his once more, gently this time. "Once more under the mistletoe because it's festive. Happy Christmas, Remus. This was the best gift I've gotten."
"Happy Christmas, Tonks. And - thank you. For the chess set, and also for tonight. This was - this made for a rather spectacular Christmas for me, as well," he replied, smiling softly.
She grinned. "Now let's head upstairs before one of those aforementioned children sees us and is traumatized by the fact that their professor has a sex life."
He groaned slightly in embarrassment, but the embarrassment didn't last long as she grabbed him by the hand and they made their way quietly up to his room, shushing each other and chuckling like teenagers caught out of bed.
It had been a spectacular Christmas, indeed.