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I’m Falling Apart, I’m Barely Breathing

Summary:

Title from Lifehouse, Broken

Students complete their internships; Shinshou and Aizawa watch the Hosu incident on television and Aizawa must deal with the aftermath. And final exams. And summer training camp. This man can't catch a break. Interspersed with some soft EraserMic and Dadzawa.

Notes:

I'm back! My computer died and I went to get it fixed and they told me it's dead dead so I had to get my newer one up and running which meant waiting on a part and then transferring data plus the school I work at has had state testing and finals are this week so I had to write those and grading and yeah. I haven't given this series up! I actually already had most of this story written when everything went haywire.
Please enjoy! Leave some feedback if you're willing (I adore seeing it). I tried out a new perspective from an OC in some flashbacks.
Chapter 1 Title from Buffy's episode Once More with Feeling - Standing.

Chapter 1: Wish I could play the father/ And take you by the hand

Chapter Text

Kaede was tired. She was mildly amused by the thought; she knew there was a better word than tired. She’d been pulling a double shift and just wanted to go home, sink into a hot bath, and climb into bed. She was pulled from her musings by a tall, handsome, blond man entering the building and looking around. “Can I help you, sir?” She did her best flirtatious smile.

“I’m looking for Midoriya-san. I wanted to buy her lunch.” He smiled and Kaede swooned on the inside. Inko, you lucky girl!

“I’ll let her know. What’s your name?”

“Yamada.” Kaede quickly shot off the message, listening to the man hum and tap his fingers along the counter. All too soon, her coworker appeared and whisked the man off. With a sigh, Kaede returned to work. It wasn’t like she had time to date anyhow.


“What’s going on in that beautiful mind of yours, Sho?” Hizashi curled against his husband’s chest, a hand running over the finally bared skin, drawing designs that only he could see.

“Do you think the general ed teacher will allow me to take on a student intern?”

“The purple haired boy?”

“Yeah.”

“You can always ask. It’s clear that he’s gunning for the hero course.” He kissed along his husband’s jaw. “Worry about that when we head back; we’ll have an entire day of staff meetings to sit through anyway.” The dark-haired man let out an amused huff. “So kiss me, you fool.” The two chuckled as their lips met and their bodies melted together.


Kaede watched as Inko stormed back into the building half an hour later, on the phone with someone. “The nerve! I get that he’s Shouta’s best friend and all, but this is not his business!” The woman paused and her frown grew deeper. “No, Masaru. I know what you think. But this is really for the best. It wouldn’t be fair to them.” A tear trickled down her cheek. “He’s barely eighteen. He’s got a dangerous job, is crashing at a friend’s, and is trying to get his life back on track. A child would throw all of that out of the window.” She paused for a deep breath. “Things are steady for me. I can handle this.” Kaede did her best to appear busy as she eavesdropped on the conversation. It wasn’t a secret that Inko was pregnant and single. But no one knew anything about the mystery father and apparently it wasn’t that blond man from before. She pondered on the likelihood of Inko giving her his number. “I have to go back to work. I know this sounds awful of me. But I really am trying to look out for all of us. The baby and I need stability and I’m at a point where I can have that. Shouta needs the freedom to save money, find his own apartment, maybe start dating.” A pause. “I’ve made my decision. Bye.”

“Everything okay, Midoriya-san?” Kaede approached, shuffling around some papers for appearance’s sake.

The woman plastered a smile on her face. “Just a little bit of family troubles. Nothing too major. Thank you for asking, Kazama-san.” With that, the young woman hurried away, leaving Kaede to continue about her endless paperwork. At least my quirk makes this go more smoothly. Her enhanced memory made filing extremely simple, repetitious work. With this, she let her mind wander to a dreamscape of rainy days and coffee accompanied by a tall man with an inviting smile.


Shouta wasn’t surprised when he sat through the meeting and received his homeroom’s list of internship requests. Todoroki and Bakugo gathered far more than most first years in the past have; but several others scooped some good names, also. He acknowledged his son’s lack of requests and decided to talk to him about it at lunch the following day. He saw his coworker, Minami Yuna,  also known as Paradoxical Paradise, the illusion hero. She taught psychology and was the homeroom teacher for 1-C. “Minami-san, do you have a moment?”

“Sure thing, Eraser. What’s up?”

“I wanted to speak with you about the possibility of working with Shinsou for an internship.”

A smile broke out across her face and a small rainbow shimmered around her. “That would be wonderful! He’s been working hard to get into heroics.” She glanced around and lowered her voice. “And to be frank, he’s definitely a fan of yours.”

He ignored the compliment. “Since my students will all be away on internships, I was hoping that I could pull him from some of his classes during that week so that he has some time to rest after school and do homework before I take him on a few patrols.”

“I’m sure we can arrange that. I’ll talk to Ectoplasm and Midnight – he’s good in math and can easily make up the art history work.”

“Thanks.” He nodded at her and slunk off to draft a training plan.


Kaede prided herself on being observant. She had to find ways to entertain herself while working, so she would watch people. Coworkers, patients, their families… everyone had a fascinating story about them. However, as Inko’s stomach grew, so did Kaede’s intrigue about what was happening in her colleague’s life. She had unfortunately not seen the blond since his initial visit several weeks prior and Inko was close-lipped about her situation.

The woman in question was starting to struggle a little with the job’s demands, her pregnancy weighing her down and heating her up as her due date neared. Kaede often found herself volunteering to help the other with smaller parts of her job or bringing her water. “Here, Midoriya-san. You should take a break.”

“Thank you.” The pregnant woman settled into a chair behind the other’s desk. “I swear my feet are almost as big as my stomach.”

“They’re not that bad. Though I’m sure with all the heat you’d appreciate a cold soak.”

“Mitsuki’s feet were constantly swollen. At least she gave birth in March and was able to avoid the summer, though.” The women chatted a little as Inko took the time to ease the strain on her body and rehydrate. Unfortunately for Kaede, she was not all that forthcoming about anything.

“I bet you and the father are excited, though. That little bundle of joy will be here soon!”

Inko didn’t bat an eye. “I think I’m more anxious about it right now. Mitsuki told me horror stories about the birthing process! I don’t think I can handle that!”

“Oh, you’ll do fine.” Kaede smiled at her, noting her avoidance of talking about the father.

“I ought to get back to things. Thank you again, Kazama-san.” With a groan, the woman was off and Kaede had no more answers than before. She refused to give up, though.


Shouta walked his students through the process of deciding on their internships and figuring out hero names. He couldn’t help but think of Hizashi giving him his when they were in class together all those years ago. A simple action with long reaching consequences. He didn’t think he’d ever guess that he’d end up marrying the loud boy that sat next to him. He listened as his kids presented names that ranged from humorous to practical, from lengthy to short. He did wince at the interactions between Midnight and Bakugo.

When it came time to hear his son’s, his heart clenched at the boy’s decision; it took a lot of strength to reclaim a term that had been used to belittle you. Before they knew it, it was time for lunch. Shouta waited for several students to file out the room before approaching the hero-in-training about having lunch. He had heard the boy muttering about possibilities.

Yet, before he could speak, the boy was swept away by All Might. Shouta frowned a little and barely resisted the temptation to listen in. Instead, he slunk to the staff lounge and collapsed in his chair. “No luck with the little listener?” Hizashi’s breath tickled the back of his neck.

“He’s eating with All Might.” He grumbled, hoping his jealousy and disdain didn’t come across.

“Ah. Well, at least that means I can have you to myself for a little bit!” He knocked his shoulder into the grouchy man. “Maybe next time we can pack a little bento for him, and you can invite him ahead of time.”

“Yeah. I guess I’ll ask him after classes today.”

“There you go, Sho!” He was blinded with a smile. “Now let’s get some actual food in you.”


Shouta was gathering together the notes he’d taken during the physical activities for the day as the kids chattered in the classroom, waiting for the last bell to ring. “Midoriya, Bakugo, Iida, see me after class for a moment.” The boys gave responses of varying enthusiasm before returning to what they were doing before. Finally, the shrill ring dismissed the rest of the class and two of the boys approached his desk.

“Sensei, what did you need with us?” Iida spoke up.

“Ah, I just wanted to know if you would mind bringing a small gift to your brother. I haven’t had a chance to visit with him.” The boy stiffened at the mention of his brother.

“Of course, sir.” Aizawa nodded and reached into his bag for a small, wrapped gift that he and Hizashi had put together for their old friend.

“Thank you. That’s all.”

“Have a good day, Sensei. Midoriya, I’ll see you tomorrow.” With that, the boy left the room.

“Sensei?” Midoriya spoke up.

“Let me speak with Bakugo first. Do you mind stepping outside?”

“O-of course!” Midoriya awkwardly shuffled out the door and when it shut, Shouta grabbed two papers from his bag.

“Okay kid. I have two lists for you. One is of therapists that work with heroes; there is one on here that also works at the school – she teaches psychology to second- and third-year students. There are several others, though. You and parents can look through – I gave a description of their quirks and specialties.” The boy grunted as his eyes skimmed over the list. “This other one is a list of courses you can replace art with. Nedzu gave a handful of recommendations; he suggested you consider filling it with a business or support course class. A better understanding of gear or business aspects of things cannot hurt in a hero’s career. I worked to develop my capture weapon. I’m sure whoever you partner with for your internship will be able to share their experiences with both support companies and the business aspect of the job. There are also elective courses in history and law that may interest you. You will need to let me know before the end of your internship which you select.” He waited to see if the boy would comment. “That’s all.”

The boy rose, put his papers into his bag, and left without a word; Shouta did hear the superpowered boy squeak a good-bye to him before scampering into the room. “Sensei?”

“Kid.”

“I actually was hoping to talk to you! I understand that you probably don’t have a lot of time today or anything… but I had a lot of thoughts surrounding the internships and training and…”

“I was going to see if you wanted to discuss internships tomorrow during lunch.” He cut to the chase.

The boy squeaked. “Oh! Oh, um, sure!” He gave off one of his blinding smiles. “I’d like that, Sensei!”

“Don’t worry about lunch. I’ll bring something for you.”

“Th-thank you, Sensei!” The boy shuffled his feet. Shouta stood and ruffled the kid’s hair before picking up his bag and nodding towards the door. The two quietly left the room, Midoriya for once not feeling the need to verbally process his thoughts. “Bye, Sensei!” He waved to the older man as he turned to the shoe lockers and Aizawa proceeded along to the teacher’s lounge.

“How’d it go?” His husband greeted him as he packed his work up.

“Good.” He packed up his own desk space. He had patrol that evening in addition to grading, and he wanted to accomplish that at home while Hizashi made dinner for them. They walked out of the building, the blond filling the space with anecdotes from the day and drawing small smiles out of his husband.


Kaede was on break and chatting with her sister when Inko went into labor. Their conversations were typically about Kaede’s little niece or Inko’s family situation. Naturally, Kaede brought this development up. They had all been amazed at Inko’s determination to work as long as possible, even as her due date inched ever closer. “Only around a week ahead of schedule and little Izuku has decided to make an appearance.” She heard her sister chuckle.

“Babies will do that. This little tadpole couldn’t wait, either! It would’ve been nice if she had. February is still too cold for comfort.” Kaede hummed in agreement. “See anything about that hunky blond?”

“No! It’s totally unfair. He’s gorgeous. But still, nothing about the father, either. I worry about her, nee-san.”

“All you can do is support her. Which it sounds like you’ve been doing.”

“She is almost always crying. I really hope that settles down once the baby is born. It’s a vicious cycle for her trying to keep hydrated.”

“Only time will tell. I am thankful I have never been a crier.”

“Only when you wanted to get your way.” Kaede teased, but quickly got off the phone when she saw a familiar blond man walk through the door. “He’s here! I’ll text you.” She looked up with a soft smile. “May I help you?”

“Do you know if Midoriya-san is here?” The man looked frantic.

“She went into labor not that long ago and left.” The man muttered something in English. “I’m sorry I can’t be of more help. Maybe if you leave your number, I can give you an update later?”

The man slowly shook his head. “That’s not necessary. I’ll… It’s not that important. I’m sure we’ll get an update about her soon ourselves. Thank you.” As they said goodbye, the man immediately started texting and Kaede sighed. Guess I really should move on.


“Do you think he’ll like it?” Shouta finished arranging the bento he had put together under his husband’s supervision.

“Of course he will. Babe, relax. It’s just Izuku. You’ve had millions of conversations with him before.”

“Before I knew who he was. I feel like there’s so much more pressure now.”

“But he doesn’t know that. And knowing him, he’ll keep up a steady stream of chatter and you can relax into that.” The two finished putting their things together and left for UA. Hizashi talked about meaningless things, bumping against his husband when he was getting too much into his own head.

The hours flew by for the erasure hero and then it was time for lunch. Midoriya waved off his friends and followed Shouta to a small conference room for them to eat in. Shouta remained impassive as he handed his son the bento he’d made that morning, refusing to allow his body to reveal his nerves.

“Oh, wow, thank you! This looks amazing, Sensei! Did you cook all this?”

Shouta rubbed the back of his neck. “My husband did most of the cooking. I’m not great behind a stove.”

The boy laughed. “That’s okay! My mom is a really good cook and she’s been trying to teach me for years. Kacchan says I’m hopeless.” He took a bite of the meat and a blissed-out expression crossed his face. “This is delicious, tell your husband I said so. It’s really close to my favorite food. But, oh! Internships! I don’t know if All Might told you, but I got a late offer!”

“From whom?”

“Gran Torino. I’m not familiar with him and All Might said that he taught here for a single year as his homeroom teacher. I can’t find much about him online and All Might seems frightened of him. Which is a little concerning but he will probably be good to learn from, even though he is probably very old and not super active anymore… I wish I could find out more about him. I don’t even know what his quirk is!”

“I can look him up for you in the Hero Network. It won’t give a ton of information, but it could give you some.”

“You’d do that for me?”

“Sure thing, kid.” He pulled out his phone and started typing.

“I can’t wait to have access to the Hero Network. There must be so many quirks to learn about!” The man chuckled as the boy started murmuring about various quirks.

“It’s useful. Helps find partners for missions. Here he is. Retired Pro-hero Gran Torino. Quirk: Jet. Seems he’s particularly strong and his quirk increases his speed exponentially.”

“Retired? I guess that makes sense, given his probably age. But why would he come out of retirement to help me? That doesn’t make any sense. All Might seemed too frightened of him to have asked…”

“I don’t know his reasoning, but why not you?” Shouta finished his food and packed the dishes away.

“I didn’t do a great job at the sports festival. I injured myself so much that none of the other pros wanted me! There isn’t really anything special to pick out.”

“Midoriya. You demonstrated excellent analysis skills at the sports festival, which did not even begin to touch on what your notebooks have shown you capable of. Perhaps, given his experience with strength enhancing quirks, he saw that you struggled in that regard and wanted to help you reach your potential? You have talent. The other pros that made selections; they aren’t teachers or former teachers. Perhaps that is the difference in why they made the offers they made.”

“You think so?”

“Not all heroes can teach someone quirk control. They can demonstrate and explain aspects of the job but aren’t equipped for the fundamentals.”

“Oh. I guess I am way behind.” The boy gave a self-deprecating laugh. “I have only had my quirk since the entrance exam after all.”

“You’ve only had it since when?”

Midoriya pulled into himself. “Th-the entrance exam… It came in very late. I was t-told that my body… that it could have blown… my body couldn’t handle it. That the amount of p-power contained in it could’ve blown apart my limbs.”

Aizawa knelt beside the boy, who had completely curled into himself and hid his face in his knees. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? We could’ve revamped your training to focus on that aspect. You’ve never had quirk counseling, either, have you?”

“No.”

“Okay.” He ruffled the green hair. “After your internship, we’ll look at changing up your training regimen to accommodate this. In the meanwhile, please be careful with your quirk. Use the other skills we’ve worked on if you need to fight, okay?”

“I’ll try.” The voice was meek, and the pro-hero moved his hand from the boy’s hair to his shoulder.

“Good. I’ll be doing training with another student while you are away. When you get back, maybe we’ll do some small training sessions with both of you.”

“Thank you, Aizawa-sensei.” He leaned in to hug the man, who quickly returned it.

“Anytime.”


Shouta reminded his students of behavioral expectations as they congregated at the train station outside of UA. They would be scattered across the country for the next week and unless there was an emergency, out of touch with himself. He faced some anxiety with letting them go and waited until all students had boarded their trains to return to the school.

He needed to develop an outline of training for Shinsou and Midoriya. His focus on Shinsou would initially be basic athletic capability; however, he would add in some classroom time to work on information he would be missing in the gen ed course that hero students needed to know. He already had his patrol schedule; he usually picked up more patrols during internships, so he wasn’t going to have Shinsou accompany him on all of them.

The sun lowered in the sky before he felt content with the small packet of information he would be giving to the purple-haired boy. He included a suggested nutrition plan and sleep schedule to accommodate the patrols as well as information regarding underground heroes, their training schedule, academic information, and necessity of submitting a costume application to the support department. He hoped the kid knew what he was getting himself into; getting prepared for a transfer was not easy work.