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Ughhhhhhh, why’d they have to be nice? Why couldn’t they be rude? That would be so much easier! Wait, shit, no it wouldn’t what the fuck is wrong with me?! No, it’s okay, bad thoughts don’t mean I’m a bad person.
Thomas took a deep breath and ran his hands over his face. Guess I’m not the only one having a crisis. Shit, poor Roman, poor… everyone.
He turned idea after idea over in his mind, trying to figure out how to repair the relationships between his Sides. He was realizing more and more how very little he actually knew about them. He could see why Roman would be upset, hell, Thomas figured he himself would be pretty pissed off. And Virgil, Janus, and Remus had a history, and it didn’t seem very positive.
Thomas took a break from his thoughts to ground himself. Looking around the room, his eyes landed on the video lights.
I just released a video, I should be good for a while. No meetings tomorrow, everyone’s getting a break… fuck it.
He pushed himself up from the couch, walked over to the cabinets, opened them, and realized he had no wine glasses left. He felt Logan looking over his glasses at him.
“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” Thomas muttered. He grabbed his largest coffee mug, opened a cheap bottle of wine, and filled his mug. He downed half of it in one go, coughing a bit at the end. He refilled his mug, grabbed the rest of the bottle, and flopped onto the couch. A noir film, Lost Highway, caught his attention. He was sold when he saw it had Bill Pullman in it.
He drank mindlessly, until the movie was almost done and he went to pour himself another mug of wine, when no more wine came out of the bottle. Thomas frowned.
I don’t even feel tipsy, is this wine company ripping people off? He stood, or at least tried to, but fell back on the couch.
Oh shit. Guess they’re not ripping people off.
Thomas leaned back and spread his arms over the back of the couch, only for Virgil to appear.
“You good?” Virgil slurred.
Thomas raised his eyebrows. “You good?”
Virgil swayed, said “No,”, and fell onto the couch, face on the top of the cushion. Thomas sighed deeply and patted his head, earning him a hiss.
“You’re drunk, I gotta protect you.”
“And you’re doing awesome. I’m not injured.”
“Dope.”
Thomas chuckled. “Didn’t realize I was drinking that much.”
“And you’re a lightweight,” Virgil added, voice muffled.
“Whatever, you’re worse off than I am,” Thomas teased.
“I’m your autono- autota- automor- I’m your breathing brain stuff, I’m gonna get more affected.”
“‘Breathing brain stuff’?”
“Shut up.”
Thomas laughed heartily.
“I believe what Virgil was trying to say is ‘autonomic nervous system’.”
Virgil snapped and finger-gunned at Logan. Thomas and Logan got Virgil situated so his head was laying on Thomas’ lap, and in less than a minute he was passed out. Logan kept infodumping as he got a blanket and glass of water for Virgil.
“...ethanol is broken down in many steps, most notably in the liver, where it is broken down into acetaldehyde via interaction with alcohol dehydrogenase. Acetaldehyde is extremely toxic and a powerful carcinogen, but it’s usually quickly metabolized into acetate, and then turned into water and carbon dioxide in places besides the liver. Acetate has many industrial uses, and is the base for many more complex molecules...”
Thomas nodded and made sounds at what he hoped were appropriate intervals, alcohol causing him to lose track of the conversation frequently.
“‘TIS I, YOUR CREATIVITY!!!”
Thomas and Virgil both jumped, although Virgil settled quickly, not fully regaining consciousness.
“Do not wake the Virgil,” Logan warned.
Roman waved carelessly, and the next moment Virgil had thick headphones on.
“There! Now our emo won’t hear a thing!” Roman declared. “Who wants to sing karaoke?”
Thomas looked down at Virgil, who was sleeping soundly. “Sure, why not.”
“Wonderful!” Roman summoned a speaker, microphone, and lyric display. “I’ll begin! Celine Dion, what do you have in store for us tonight?!”
“Celine Dion?!” Patton said excitedly, rising up next to the couch. “Oh Roman, you’re always such a good singer!” his voice cracked as he started getting choked up. He brought his fists up to his face and whispered, “You truly have a gift.”
“Well of course I do!” Roman said as the opening strains to My Heart Will Go On. Patton sat down next to Logan, moved to tears by Roman’s performance. Logan gave him a tissue and awkwardly patted his back while spouting facts, more quietly now that Roman was taking the spotlight.
A few more songs later, and Patton had settled against Logan, who was starting to drift off. Thomas had cracked open another bottle of wine to keep his buzz, and Roman was living for the attention.
“Thank you, thank you! What shall I sing next?”
“How about Evil Night Together?”
Roman jumped and looked at Janus warily. “I do quite enjoy that song, I know how it goes of course, but it’s been a while since I’ve sang it.”
Janus twirled his hand, and a sparkly yellow and black microphone appeared in his hand. “I can accompany you, if you’d like?”
Roman was still watching him from out of the corner of his eye. “Accompany?”
Janus nodded his head, looking Roman head-on. “Yes, accompany. It’s your turn to take center stage.”
Roman was still for a moment, before nodding and sending Janus a small smile. “Right then. Shall we?”
The opening strains played, sultry chords moving through the air.
“I'll hold your hand while they drag the river
“I'll cuddle you in the undertow
“I'll keep my hand on your trigger finger
“I'll take you down where the train tracks go
“Let's wile away the hours
“Let's spend an evil night together”
Patton was watching them, transfixed. Logan had fully passed out, lightly snoring with his head leaning against the back of the couch. Roman started singing less confidently, and Patton gasped in shock.
Janus took over, switching to sing the first part while Roman took the harmony.
“Who's gonna make you a hero
“Who's gonna blow you away
“Who's gonna make you a hero
“Hold it right there
“It's a multiple down in solitary
“And you'll uncover the evidence
“Shanghaied by a fishnet stocking
“I'll hold you close while they dust for prints.”
Roman looked at Janus, surprised. Janus met Roman’s gaze, earnest and vulnerable. Roman straightened his back, the ghost of a smile on his face.
“No need for cake or flowers
“Let's spend an evil night together.”
The song died down, and Roman grinned, offering his hand. Janus took his silently, and they shared a firm handshake while Patton squealed.
“I’m so happy for you two!!”
Roman puffed out his chest. “Glad you are, padre!”
Patton bounced in his seat. “Let me get Logan settled, and then let’s dance!!”
He got Logan a blanket and a glass of water to match Virgil’s while Roman and Janus set up an elaborate dance floor.
“Will you be joining us, Thomas?”
Thomas affectionately patted Virgil’s shoulder. “Nah, I’m a pillow right now, and I think I’m too drunk to dance anyways.”
“Fair enough! Let’s dance bitches!” Roman exclaimed as he snapped. Disco lights came on, and Patton joined the two other Sides on the dance floor.
“Do you remember
“The very first night of September,”
Roman lifted Patton by the waist and spun him, Patton and Thomas laughing. The songs cycled through, the Sides never losing energy, until a slow song came on.
Roman was panting. “I should sit this one out, I need to hydrate!” Roman sat on the couch next to Logan, closed his eyes, and immediately began snoring loudly.
Patton giggled quietly. Janus moved to stand in front of Patton.
“Patton, may I have this dance?”
Patton bit his lip. “You sure? I’m no good at dancing.”
“That’s quite alright, I can lead.”
Patton smiled meaningfully. “As long as you lead, we should be good.”
Janus swallowed to hide how choked up he was getting. “Very well.”
Thomas watched as the two new friends danced slowly, Patton giggling and looking down nervously, and Janus carefully leading him through simple steps. The song wound down, and Janus waved the scene away.
“I think it’s time to get some sleep, what do you think?” Patton asked.
Janus just nodded over towards Thomas, who had joined the other Sides in sleep. Patton smiled.
“Good point. I’ll… see you later, Janus?”
Janus smiled, unguarded. “Yes, you will.”
The next morning, everyone was hungover, and Roman, Virgil, and Thomas barely remembered a thing, but they didn’t miss how much more comfortable Patton and Janus seemed around each other.