Work Text:
“And I guess that’s why they call it the blues, time on my hands could be time spent with you…”
Ben was singing in his best Broadway voice, trying to channel Elton John as he hopped into Satine’s Lexus.
“Why hello, chickadee. I won’t be rolling like thunder under your covers- you can do that on your own time,” Satine said, giving him a fond smile and a once over, obviously assessing for any fatigue, illness, hangnail, dyspepsia, or other signs of impending demise. She seemed satisfied. “I forgot you could sing reasonably well.”
“You wound me, Teeny,” he replied, kissing her cheek. “Thanks for the ride.”
“My dearest turtledove, you are the only person I would deem worthy of a ride from the airport, aside from Padme that is. Anyway, save your singing voice for Anakin. I’m sure he’ll want to go caroling or some other disgustingly sweet activity.”
Ben sighed and leaned back in his seat. “Ah yes, I’m afraid he’s going to kill me.”
Satine loved drama like she loved life itself. “Do tell,” she said with great eagerness.
“Siri roped me into another book signing. In Boston. Two days before Christmas. I won’t get back until Christmas day or the day after depending on flights.”
“Ben Kenobi- that is a day from now. You will literally leave tomorrow,” She said, tapping her fingers against the steering wheel. “He is going to kill you. You’ve been on tour for two weeks.” How could he forget? He did miss Anakin terribly. Video calls were not enough.
Satine took a deep breath, gearing up for her next tirade. “That boy loves the holidays more than Father Christmas. He, per his usual, has plans. He’s binge watching the Hallmark channel as we speak. He set up that fucking treadmill near the TV so he could watch even while exercising. The house looks like a whole pack of elves threw up over it.”
Ben felt deflated. “I know, Teen. I’m doomed.”
“You know Anakin would never harm a hair on your head, but he will be very disappointed and stare up at you with those sad, confused, but strangely luminous eyes.”
“I know, trust me, I know. I am quite possibly the worst,” Anakin was nothing but patient and good with him, and while Ben had helped Anakin through a few foibles, his own were far greater.
“Well, get out your charm. You have work to do.”
When Ben finally got home, Anakin was not binge-watching holiday films, but was instead sleeping. He’d worked the night shift and was taking a well-deserved nap. The house was quiet and cool but quite Festively decorated, as Satine had alluded to. There had even been sleigh bells on the door than made such a pleasant jingle.
Ben set his bags down upstairs, yawned, and decided a nap for himself was in order. He quickly showered in the spare bedroom so as not to wake Anakin and then studied him for a minute as he lay sleeping. Perhaps it was a little creepy, but they were married.
Anakin had half thrown off the covers in what looked like an almost planned display of his spectacular torso, but Ben could tell by his breathing that he was asleep. Even though Ben kept telling him that he didn’t have to work out within an inch of his life on a daily basis, Anakin was secretly a bit vain and couldn’t deal with the loss of perfectly defined abs, not that Ben was complaining. Ben curled up beside him, delicately pulling the covers over them and promptly fell asleep, basking in Anakin’s furnace-like warmth. Anakin mumbled a little but didn’t stir.
After what felt like minutes but was actually hours, he woke up to Anakin’s relatively cold hand patting his belly. “Come on Ben, wake up.”
“MMmmm, sleeping” It was warm, and their bed felt too nice. He grabbed Anakin’s hands and pulled him back in bed.
Anakin flopped down beside him. “Dinner’s going to be ready in 20 minutes. If you don’t get up now, you won’t sleep tonight. And I want to see you. You’ve been gone for two weeks!”
“I’m right here. I’m sure I’m hard to miss,” he grumbled, pulling the pillow over his head. He probably wouldn’t sleep much tonight anyway.
Anakin promptly yanked the pillow off and kissed him, not seemingly caring about morning (or evening, as it was) breath. “I’m going to tickle you.”
“Ok, ok, I’m up,” Ben said, propping himself up against the headboard and trying to reach a state of wakefulness. “I did miss you, dear one.”
“I know,” Anakin said, sitting up beside him and kissing his cheek. “You’re grumpy when you wake up.”
Ben gently pushed him away. “Anakin, I am never grumpy. Would I ever be anything so mundane?”
Anakin just laughed. “Get dressed and come to dinner. If you’re not there in 15 minutes I’m coming for you.” He ran back downstairs.
Ben arrived in the kitchen as promised and poured himself a rather large glass of wine. This was not going to be a good talk. They sat down to some lovely chicken Anakin had prepared with mashed potatoes and a salad, though Ben suspected that Anakin’s portion was mashed cauliflower. He shuddered.
As they started to eat, Anakin went on about his plans, nearly giggling with glee whilst describing the watching of holiday films, the making of popcorn balls, decorating a second tree (Anakin had already decorated the first one), sledding, and actual caroling at a rest home. Then they were going to have dinner and games with Satine and Quinlan and Anakin’s father Qui plus whatever strays Qui brought along on Christmas Eve and have Christmas lunch with the Fetts and on and on.
Ben inwardly cringed as he pushed his food around his plate. How could he let Anakin down like this?
Anakin stopped his rambling and looked up at Ben. “Why aren’t you eating? I tried some new seasoning this time, don’t you like it?”
“Dear, its fine. I,” he choked a little trying to get out the words. “I may have agreed to something rash.”
Anakin set his fork down with a thump. “What?”
“Siri thought it would be good for me to go to Boston.”
“When?” Anakin was getting terse. This was not good.
“Well, tomorrow.”
Anakin leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. “Absolutely not. No. No way.”
“Anakin, you know this is important. I really want this to do well, it’s so different from my other books.” Ben’s first series of books had been a rather dark set of mysteries, but this new series was YA. Surprisingly, it had been well received.
“Ben, baby, you’ve been gone for weeks. You’re tired. Your book is having no trouble selling.”
“I am not tired.”
“You just took a nap without being forced to or without passing out.”
“Anakin, you’re always worried. I think you secretly delight in it,” Ben said, feeling petulant.
“Oh no, I am not going down this path with you. The past two Christmases nearly killed me. We are going to enjoy this one without some kind of illness or natural disaster.”
“Don’t be dramatic.”
Anakin gave him a death glare. “I will be dramatic. It is my prerogative to be dramatic. You owe me my drama. You owe me restitution!”
Anakin stood up from the table and started clearing their unfinished plates, scrapping them vigorously in the trash and slamming them in the dishwasher. “Let me remind you of our Christmases together.”
“My dear, I was there. I remember them quite well.”
Anakin continued, unperturbed. “Um, our first Christmas you nearly died.”
“I was indisposed.”
“You nearly died. I am not exaggerating. Don’t forget that I’m a fucking ICU nurse, Ben. I cannot and will not go through that again.”
Ben couldn’t do anything but shrug. “It is very unlikely.”
Anakin continued to bang around the kitchen in his mini-rampage. “And let’s not forget the second.”
Ben was confused. “But that one ended well?”
Anakin was not done. “I frantically drove for 8 hours in a blizzard after being up all night so that you wouldn’t have to be stuck in a germy, smelly airport any longer. I WAS SO WORRIED ABOUT YOU!” Anakin had gone white with anger. This was not good.
“But your proposal was so lovely Anakin. It’s good to be flexible. Sometimes plans change,” Ben said softly, trying to be the voice of reason while in reality being the voice of poor marital relations.
“SOME PLANS SHOULD NOT CHANGE, BEN! I can’t even imagine what kind of catastrophe will happen this time.” Anakin slammed his hands down on the counter. “I WILL NOT LOSE YOU.”
Ben felt sick with guilt. “It’s unlikely anything will happen,” he replied meekly.
Anakin took a deep, seemingly calming breath. His blue eyes were still fiery, but a little kind. He rolled them expressively. “We’re talking about you here, the master of self-care and rest. I wouldn’t put anything past you.”
“Anakin, sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.” That was not likely the highest form of counter argument when one’s spouse was upset.
Anakin took another deep, shuddering breath. “Stop talking.”
Ben decided it would be interest to obey. They sat in tense silence for the rest of the evening, watching one of Anakin’s beloved films. The girl did marry the prince in the end, and all was well. All was not well between Ben and Anakin, however.
“Shall we go to bed?” Ben asked tentatively. Anakin was very beautiful when angry.
Anakin spread out on the couch, pulling a blanket around himself and rolling away from Ben. “I’m sleeping on the couch. I love you baby but I’m so mad at you right now.”
“I thought you wanted to look at me?” Ben said, trying out a wink and a flirtatious smile. It did not work.
Anakin remained staring at the back of the couch. “Not right fucking now I don’t.”
“Anakin…”
“Just give me a little time.”
“All right,” Ben replied, and trudged up the stairs. He pulled a few dirty things out of his suitcase and replaced them with a few others, then lay on the bed and stared at the ceiling. He’d have to make up for this somehow.
In the morning, he dressed and showered, then reported downstairs. He’d either call a cab or see if Anakin was willing to drive him. He was not hopeful.
Anakin had just run on the treadmill and was glistening and gorgeous and shirtless. Ben’s breath caught in his throat. Anakin was breathtaking and he was so good to Ben, and he did not deserve Anakin, especially after last night.
“Hello there,” Ben said, pushing some sweaty hair off Anakin’s forehead.
“I’m still mad at you, but I’ll take you to the airport,” Anakin grumbled, pulling on a shirt.
Ben could see that his carry-on bag was complete with one of Anakin’s care packages, so he couldn’t be all that mad.
“Dearest, I’ll make it up to you, I swear. Our plans will just be set back a little,” Ben said, trying to pull a reluctant Anakin into a hug.
“You’ve said that too many times,” he replied, but allowed himself to be embraced, relaxing into it.
“I know,” Ben said, relishing his touch, however brief.
They drove to the airport in relative silence but at least it wasn’t hostile this time. As they had left the house, Ben again noted the pleasing chime of the sleigh bells on the door. They sounded so homey and were so Anakin.
Anakin kissed him as he left the car. “Please be safe. Please take care of yourself. I love you.”
Ben felt a pricking behind his eyes, like tears might start. How horrifying. He had been very naughty. “I love you too.”
Ben left the car and proceeded through security. He felt physically ill. What was more important to him? Anakin or his book? Life was short and he himself knew very well that there were no guarantees. He sat down by the gate and pulled out his phone. Qui would know what to do.
“Wee ginger! Aren’t you supposed to be leaving?” Qui asked. He always knew what was going on. Ben was pretty sure that he had an actual crystal ball.
“I don’t know what to do. I think I made a big mistake.”
“Well, it’s not an irreparable one. You know what to do. Anyway, Peaches and Kiwi miss you.” Ben doubted that the cat and parrot were aware of his absence but ok.
“All right, thank you.”
“See you Christmas eve.” Smug bastard, of course he knew what Ben would do.
Ben hung up the phone and made another call.
“Ben! Bennie!!! What? Is your flight delayed? You’re supposed to get your pretty ass to Boston ASAP!” Siri exclaimed.
“I can’t, Siri.”
Silence for just a moment, then cacaphony. “Ben, this is big! Its important!! There’ll be throngs of people. People will be lining up to see you….” She continued to rant with an increasing use of expletives.
“I can’t, Siri. I’ve got to go. I’ll call you after the holidays.” He hung up while she was still talking, as it would be hours before he could get a word in anyways. He may have just lost his agent, but life would go on. Ben sat, paralyzed for a moment and watched his flight leave.
Once he broke out of the spell, he called Anakin, who sounded concerned. “Wasn’t your flight supposed to have left an hour ago? It wasn’t delayed.” Of course Anakin had checked.
“Ummm” Ben felt foolish but relieved.
“What? Did you catch cholera? Did you lose a limb? Did human traffickers abduct you? Did the airport fall into a sink hole? Is there an alien invasion?”
Ben sighed. “Anakin, I think I’m rather old for human traffickers. And they wouldn’t let me keep my phone.”
He could almost hear Anakin tearing out his hair. “Ben, what in the fuck. What in the actual fuck?”
“Anakin, I’m not going. Can you pick me up or shall I call a cab?”
“Are you sure you’re not sick?” This was not sarcasm.
“I’ve never felt better. I want to spend Christmas with you,” Ben nearly shouted. A mother with her toddler turned to stare at him. He shrugged apologetically.
Anakin’s voice softened, “Of course I’ll come get you.”
And he did. They spent the rest of the day in bed rediscovering the lines and shapes of each other, laughing and making love. Things were never perfect, but they were so good. This would be the best Christmas yet.