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That funeral was weirdly depressing. It shouldn't be, Linda was there just for social protocol, she's never been close to Jane Perkins. Sure, they were third removed cousins or something like that, and they went to school together, so she got an invite, but she couldn't say she was sad for the woman's death. She also had no empathy for Tom Huston, and the child… it was petty, but he looked too much like his father for Linda to care about him.
So why did it all feel so… wrong? It was a surreal sensation, like the world was out of balance, like it was walking on a thin line between reality and something else. It didn't make any sense, so Linda tried to brush it off her mind. It was nothing, she was being silly. But the more time she spent in that room, staring at the coffin and hearing those speeches, the more nauseous she felt, until a point she couldn't bear it anymore. She left the room, walking down the corridors of the building until she found herself on a balcony, taking a deep breath of fresh air. What the hell was wrong with her?
She leaned on the cold metal rail and looked out into the night, staring at the sky for a second. It looked perfectly normal, dark as it could be expected for a moonless night. The world was not out of place. A woman was dead, there was nothing strange with that. People died every day, no big deal. Staring into the city lights, she wondered where Becky Barnes could be. Linda half expected to see her there, since back in high school Becky was much closer to Jane than Linda was.
……
Becky was running in the dark forest, her breath loud and ragged. She didn't dare to look back. Was he following her? Or was he still down? Was he…? Did she…? There was a lot of blood. She felt it drying on her skin. Where was the knife? Did she let it behind? Everything was a blur. All she could think about was getting home, getting to safety. Anything else she could figure out later. She started running faster when she saw the porch light of her house.
Home. Safety. She went inside and started to lock all the doors and windows. Only when the last close clicked, she was able to stop and take a breath. But it wasn't a deep calming breath, she was just taking in gulps of air, almost desperately, panting, and she had to consciously stop herself and force her breath to slow down, to keep herself from fainting right there.
……
Linda's breath was getting better after a minute in the cold night air, but she still felt weird.
"Well well well, if it isn't Linda Monroe!" She heard a voice behind her, and turned her head to see a tall man entering the balcony.
She narrowed her eyes, scrutinizing his lanky frame, from the brown pants and ugly tie to the dark hair and mustache. She raised an eyebrow, unimpressed, as he leaned on the rails by her side.
"Theodore, right?" Linda asked, with a mild disgust in her face. He went to school with her as well, and they crossed paths fairly often. He was a fun kind of asshole.
"You can call me Ted, sweetheart." He took a cigarette from his pocket and lit it, as Linda scoffed and rolled her eyes.
"What are you even doing here? I don't remember you being close to Jane" she said, taking the cigarette from his hand and smoking from it unceremoniously.
He gave her that disgusting side smile, watching her puff out the smoke before taking it back from her. The nicotine helped calm that unsettling feeling, but not as much as Linda was expecting.
"I guess I wasn't, but I fucked most of her friends, so…" he shrugged, nonchalant, and Linda let out a small sarcastic laugh.
"I suppose that's as close as it gets for you." She mocked, but Ted nodded in agreement, after considering it for a half a second.
"What's your excuse? I don't remember you being close to her, either." He asked, looking at her with an eyebrow raised.
"She was in my cheer squad, back in school. And I guess we're distant cousins, too." She shrugged, much like Ted did.
They stayed silent for a moment, passing the cigarette back and forth, both staring at the night sky. Her mind wandered off, trying to figure out what exactly was making her feel so uneasy.
…..
Becky was in the shower, letting the water take the blood and mud from her body. She was still shaking, and as her breath steadied and the adrenaline started to wear off, her mind began to process what happened. She hit the artery. Stanley would die without medical care. Part of her thought about calling an ambulance. There was still time, maybe? But… what good would it do? For whatever reason, Linda came to her mind. The memory of Linda yelling at her, saying she didn't have to be a martyr, that she should leave Staley.
Maybe it was time she listened. Damn, he was the one who brought that knife! It would be Becky bleeding in the woods, if things went his way. Then why should she try to save him? It was probably too late for it anyway. Stanley was most likely dead already. Stanley was dead. That notion was almost surreal for her at first. And then it started to sink in. Becky thought she'd feel guilty, or mourn him somehow. No. All she could feel was relief. Maybe… yes, maybe he deserved that fate.
……
"You know, the thing about Hatchetfield is… it's full of jerks who deserve to die horribly." Ted broke the silence, still looking out, almost like he was talking to himself.
"Present company included." she snorted, half joking. He chuckled, but didn't deny it.
"But Jane wasn't one of them, was she?" He took the cigarette from Linda's hand, and her eyes followed as he inhaled from it.
"Nope. She was one of the few exceptions, I guess." her eyes scrutinized Ted's face, trying to puzzle him out.
He looked laid back and uncaring, as he normally did, but the things he was saying, they were getting unsettling close to what was going through Linda's mind.
"Maybe that's why this feels so wrong." He turned his face to stare her in the eyes.
For a second, she considered evading this topic, brush it off as nonsense and tell Ted she didn't know what he was talking about. She didn't want to come off as crazy. But her curiosity to know if someone else was having that sensation got the better of her.
"You're feeling it too?" it was better not to elaborate, though, wait to see if they were on the same page.
"Yeah, like it disrupted the space-time continuum, right?" a dorky crooked smile crossed his face, but his words made Linda frown.
"The what ?" She took the cigarette from him, still looking at the man with a bemused expression.
"Nah, forget it, I was watching sci-fi movies yesterday" he rolled his eyes, and Linda groaned in frustration. "But yeah, it's like something broke in the world, or it got kinda crooked, I don't know."
"M-hm, I'm getting this feeling too. Fucking weird." she admitted, and Ted nodded.
……
It was so weird, being alone in the house. Well, not being alone, exactly, but the knowledge that he wasn't coming back. She didn't have to worry about him coming home drunk or just in a bad mood. She didn't have to worry about things like "will he like the dinner tonight?", or whatever else could make him lose his temper. She was walking barefoot around the house, with only a bathrobe, and for once she wasn't worried he'd arrive and snap at her for it.
A smile crossed her face. And then it turned into laughter. God, she must look like a maniac, laughing alone in the living room after killing her husband. Killing. The word lingered in her mind for a second, before it started to weight down. Then it sinked in. I killed someone. How could she have done that? Why did it feel so right, and so wrong at the same time? For a second, she felt like it didn't happen, like it wasn't real. Like nothing was real.
"I killed someone." She tested the sound of those words, trying to bring them home, make them real. It didn't feel right, it made her feel… not like herself. Becky would never kill someone. She was a good person. "I killed Stanley." It sounded slightly less bad. "I killed my abuser." She immediately tapped her mouth with both hands, as a reflex.
Becky has never said that word out loud, abuse . Not about herself, that is. Saying it out loud made it more real, somehow. But that sentence felt so much better. She didn't feel like she was a bad person, she felt like herself. She used to stand up against injustices, right? That felt a bit more like it. It helped her ground herself again. The world still felt weird, like something was out of place, and it was slowly trying to get stable again. It made sense, of course. Becky's life just turned completely upside down, it would take a while for her to settle in that new reality.
……
They spent another second in silence, still trying to settle that sensation. When Ted spoke again, his question took Linda completely off guard.
"I thought Becky Barnes would be here, offer her shoulder to Tommy." His tone was casual, though a bit snarky, and he took the cigarette from her hand. Being a bastard made Ted a good company for gossip, just because he could be as acid as Linda in his commentary. But that one didn't please the blonde.
"You're a jerk, Ted." She scoffed, rolling her eyes, and he raised an eyebrow when he noticed there was no fun behind her disdain.
"Is this jealousy? Oh, did you and Barnes bang?" His eyes were lit with excitement, and Linda couldn't hide her surprise, eyes going wide at the suggestion.
"Where the fuck did you get that from?" She made her best disgusted face.
"Didn't you? I remember there was a mad chemistry going on between you. God knows I had my share of wet dreams about it." He had this trademark asshole smile, and Linda's face of disgust deepened.
"Ok, you're a jerk and you're disgusting. It's impressive that you still can get laid acting like this." She mocked, with a sneer, and Ted laughed.
"It sounds like a good match for your bitchy attitude, though. We should give it a try, huh?" He said with a malicious smile, leaning a bit towards her, and Linda raised an eyebrow.
"What are you suggesting, Ted? I'm a married woman, you know." She half pretended to be offended, but there was a tiny smile on her lips.
"That's my favorite kind of woman." He leaned down a bit more, and Linda didn't back off.
"Ew." She tossed what remained of the cigarette on the floor and stepped on it with her heel, not taking her eyes from Ted's.
His grin got larger, and she raised an eyebrow. Slick bastard. Nobody should be charming in such a hideous mustache, how did he manage that? Linda took her phone, dialing her most called number.
"Gerald? Yes, it's almost over here. Fifteen minutes is great. No, you can't buy candy canes for River. Because I know he's using it to manipulate you! We talked about this, Gerald, you gotta stop using the boys as an excuse to buy sugar! I know Christmas time is harder, get a grip on yourself! Fifteen minutes, Gerald."
She hung up the phone and stared back at Ted. He was looking at her with a hungry glimmer in his eyes.
"Did that turn you on?" She teased, with a judgmental expression on her face.
"You know you rock the bossy bitch style, Linda." That was one of the weirdest compliments she ever got. She liked it. She arched her eyebrows, a challenge in her eyes and in her little smile, for him to keep talking. "I mean, I wouldn't mind if you stepped on me a bit." They were very close by now, but not an inch of their bodies touched, creating a tension in the space between.
"You've got ten minutes." she whispered, before turning around with a hair flip and walking in the nearest bathroom. Ted followed without hesitation, locking the door behind him.
Linda just hoped a quick meaningless shag could help her shake off that strange and wrong feeling. Maybe that's what Ted was hoping too. Or maybe he was just a horny bastard. It didn't make any difference, not for her. It would already be a bonus if he made her feel something at all.
……
A couple days were not enough for Becky to fully settle in her new reality. It was a true roller coaster, honestly, with her feelings all over the place. She was afraid, terrified, that someone would find his body in the woods, or that someone would call bullshit on her story that he left her for a woman in Clivesdale. She was relieved he was gone, and sometimes she felt light as a feather. Other times, she felt guilt and doubt weighing down her shoulders. Sometimes she felt like the old Becky again, bold and unafraid. Then the fear of being caught would hit again, trapping her on this loop. The world still felt wrong, but every day it felt a little righter, like it was adjusting back in its place.
It was the third day since Jane's funeral, when she ran into Linda. She's decided to put the house to sell and rent an apartment downtown. That place had too many bad memories. So she was in the mall that day, buying some decoration for the new apartment, and when she went to the bathroom, Linda Monroe was there, fixing her makeup in front of the mirror.
"Becky Barnes! What an unpleasant surprise." she announced in that dramatic tone of hers, putting her makeup kit in her purse.
"I can say the same." Becky answered in a seemingly bored voice, but her eyes took the opportunity to check out the woman. She was stunning in a winter attire, complete with boots, hat and cape, all in black white and grey.
"I heard your husband left you for a woman in Clivesdale…" Linda's eyes seemed to inspect the bathroom cabins as she said that, verifying that they were alone in there.
"I don't wanna talk about this, especially not with you." She said with a harsh tone, but Linda just shrugged, unimpressed.
"I thought you wouldn't, it's easier to lie when you don't talk." Her tone was very matter-of-factly, but her words made Becky catch her breath in surprise.
"What's that supposed to mean?" She tried not to give away how anxious she actually was.
"Oh please, you're lucky most people in this town are stupid or just don't care enough to think. That monster would never just leave you like this." Linda rolled her eyes, sounding like she was commenting on the latest episode of Grey's Anatomy, instead of talking about Becky's life.
"Well, he did." The redhead looked at the floor, pretending to be embarrassed to avoid Linda's eyes.
"God, you really never learned how to lie! It's almost cute… if it weren't pathetic. But we're alone, you don't need to bother." she seemed to be having too much fun with that situation, and that usually wasn't good for Becky.
"I really don't know what you're talking about, Linda." She evaded again.
It wasn't possible that Linda just figured things out, Becky couldn't believe it. She was probably just sensing Becky's anxiety over the subject and trying to pretend she knew shit to trap her into telling the truth.
"Will I really have to spell it out? I know he'd never leave you, he was dependent on you, not just with the money. And with what he did to you, it was only a matter of time before it got to a point when it's your life or his." Linda's tone wasn't casual anymore, she was being dead serious. It was frightening.
"You can't insinuate something like this, Linda!" Her eyes were wide, and her hands started to shake. Damn, how did she pick that out? It could destroy her!
"Geez, relax! If I wanted to tell this to anyone else, I would have already." She had a point. But Becky wasn't willing to trust anyone so easily.
"Why are you so invested in taking some kind of confession out of me, then?" she asked with a frown, trying to figure out Linda's intentions. The blonde was always so hard to read, she had no way of knowing if she wanted to help or harm her.
"Curiosity?" she shrugged, nonchalant, and Becky narrowed her eyes on a hard expression, crossing her arms with a disbelieving pose. They started each other down for a second, then Linda broke it with a roll of her eyes. "Right, just tell me you got rid of the evidence properly."
"I-- what?" Becky was getting confused with that whole conversation. What did Linda want from her?
"You didn't?" Becky fumbled to find an answer, and the blonde sighed, pressing the bridge of her nose. "Fucking stupid…" her tone was disappointed and almost condescending and it snapped something in Becky. Why the hell was she submitting herself to that weird interrogation?
"Ok, I had enough! What the hell do you think you're doing? You have no idea what happened, and you don't get to demand anything from me!" She let out her anger and frustration, walking a step closer to Linda trying to look more intimidating.
There was a glimpse on her brown eyes and… was that the beginning of a smile? It went away too quickly for her to be sure, replaced by her usual arrogant face. Linda squared her shoulders and took a step closer too, showing she wasn't intimidated. She never was, her attitude sending a familiar chill down Becky's spine. Why arguing with Linda was so infuriating and exhilarating at the same time? That couldn't be healthy.
"Listen, Barnes, you did something right for maybe the first time in your fucking life, just please tell me you didn't half-ass it!" There was anger in her, too, barely contained. But Becky was much more furious. What right did that woman think she had, to try and demand anything from her?
"I'm not telling you anything! I owe you nothing, Linda!" She almost shouted, standing her ground, and Linda raised her eyebrows.
"Fine, whatever! But you better not get arrested, or I'll go there just to kick your ass!" Her tone was firm, between an order and a threat, and then she started marching towards the door, bumping her shoulder on Becky's.
"Why do you care?" She turned around to watch her go, her voice showing her indignation to the entitled way Linda was poking around in her life.
"I don't!" The blonde shouted as she passed through the door, and then slammed it behind her.
Becky groaned in frustration, punching the sink to vent out. Why was dealing with Linda always so confusing and infuriating? Last time they talked, that night at the hospital a couple months ago, Linda seemed a bit more open, and even though they ended up fighting then, Becky still left with some hope that things could be better between them some day. And to think Becky almost kissed her that night! God, that would've been a disaster!
But the Linda she talked to now wasn't the same, she was colder, her defenses were up, and that made her basically impossible to deal with. There was no dialogue through the sass, and she became so hard to read that Becky couldn't understand what she wanted. What has been the point of that whole conversation? Did she want to help? Was she genuinely concerned about Becky going to jail? How could she even know that Stanley was dead? Was she just trying to figure it out from Becky's reactions? And why would she even want that information? Becky took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. There was no point in stressing out with this. All she could do was carry on and try not to stress out about this. After all, she had to focus on herself right now.
Her life was just starting over again. The universe was falling back into place, and nothing would ever be the same.