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Neil was stupid. Andrew knew that.
He had known since the first time he laid eyes on this sorry excuse of a guy and Neil never failed to proof his point.
It shouldn’t be his problem, but when Neil was being stupid in front of him – what seemed to be a habit of his – it mostly turned out to become his problem.
Just like it did right now.
It was beyond him how he managed to nearly break a leg and his damn wrist at the same time, but then again, this idiot was just as stupid as he was reckless.
Andrew had watched from afar how he pulled that little stunt on the court where he somehow managed to get the ball into the damn goal, but couldn’t avoid the racquet of the other player smashing his left wrist.
His heavy landing afterwards had been a disaster to witness too, but that lucky bastard got away with only a contusion of his left leg.
Andrew thought a fracture would be a better lesson for him. On the other hand, Neil was a pain in the ass when he couldn’t play Exy for too long.
“You’re stupid,” Andrew greeted him, when he finally hobbled into the waiting area of the hospital. It was the truth and he didn’t deserve any less.
Neil supported himself on a crutch. His left hand was splinted and hung in a sling. Yet, he didn’t seem to be bothered at all.
“And yet you’re here,” he said, smiling.
Andrew just shot him a bored glance and waited for Neil to make his way to him.
“We won,” he stressed as soon as he was in reach. That idiot looked rather pleased than pained.
Great. So basically, he learned nothing out of this.
“Doesn’t change the fact you’re stupid,” Andrew pointed out and cupped his chin to get a closer look at his face. There were some scratches and bruises, but his nose didn’t seem to be broken. Lucky bastard, again.
“I’m glad we did,” Neil said.
Andrew tightened his grip. “Be careful. You sound so much like Kevin, I want to punch you.”
“But you never do.”
“Don’t make me change that.”
Andrew pulled his face closer, giving him a silent warning by staring straight into his ocean blue eyes. The urge to punch him was just as big as the urge to kiss him.
He did neither and let go.
Neil spared him another smartass answer. He was stupid, but not suicidal on purpose.
As they began to move towards the exit, Andrew noticed how Neil struggled to walk. Deeply annoyed he grabbed his uninjured arm and forced him to a halt.
Neil gave him a surprised look, as he wordlessly took the crutch and slung an arm around his torso to support him himself. Neil was a familiar weight against him and Andrew rather trusted his own strength than a lousy crutch.
“You don’t have to. I’m f – “
“Finish that sentence and you’ll walk home,” Andrew cut him off and dragged that disaster of a human being to his car.
It took a while for them getting there. Even a fast runner like Neil was useless with just one functioning leg and maneuvering him to the front seat was nothing but laborious.
Neil’s, “Sorry,” didn’t make it any better.
“Shut up.” Andrew slammed the car door with brutal force to stress his words.
They drove back in silence. Only the buzzing sound of Neil’s phone was audible whenever he got a new message. He probably made the mistake to answer one of their teammates – or worse, the former Foxes – and now everyone wanted to know what’s going on.
Of course, it was all over the news. You couldn’t play Exy for US Court without being hassled by the press for every step you took. Especially, if you were dumb enough to injure yourself like that.
Neil still wasn’t reliable when it came to answering his messages, so he probably just skimmed over most of the words. When he had enough, he finally silenced his phone. At least he knew how to do that by now.
It was strange how he still kept the phone Andrew had given him so many years ago. Even when the battery broke down for good, he refused getting a new phone and just changed the battery.
Andrew had thought about getting him a new one for some time now. He doubted Neil would ever buy one himself. Maybe he needed to force him into accepting it, but Neil being unnecessarily difficult wasn’t new to him. He could handle that.
Getting home was a matter of twenty minutes. Climbing up the staircase took half of that time.
Andrew had never been aware of how many damn steps they needed to take to get to their doorstep, but he made a mental note to not let Neil get out too soon again. He clearly wouldn’t deal with this any more than necessary.
As soon as he opened the door they were greeted by reproachful meowing. The fur monsters always made a fuss when they arrived at home, no matter if they had been away for five minutes or days. It was annoying and completely unnecessary.
Andrew lazily chased them away with his foot to close the door properly, but they were more interested in rubbing themselves against Neil’s legs anyway.
“Hey guys,” Neil said with that genuine smile on his lips that tightened something in his chest. Andrew couldn’t stand to see it. Couldn’t stand to lose it. It was unbearable. Too much to handle. Too much to feel. He wanted to keep that smile forever and protect it with all he got.
When Neil tried to lean down to give these greedy bastards a pat on the head, he nearly fell over. Andrew stopped him with a firm grip and a deadly glance.
“Sorry. I can’t pet you right now,” Neil apologized to the cats, but the softness in his eyes remained. It was an expression reserved only for them and Andrew, but he was the one who unlocked it in the first place.
Andrew didn’t know how and he didn’t do it on purpose, but it was something else he needed to protect.
“Move,” Andrew ordered, because Neil obviously should rest and walked him straight to the living room. He helped to get Neil seated on the couch and went to the kitchen to get a chair for his injured leg.
Sir followed him close behind as if he expected to get something from him.
Of course, that cat needed to be an asshole and jumped right onto the chair he wanted to move into the living room.
“Get lost,” Andrew said with a glare, but Sir was unimpressed, so he shoved him away without any mercy. He got a dissatisfied meow in return, but ignored that bastard of a cat.
If Neil was here to witness, he would laugh and tell him to let Sir be and just take another chair, but Andrew clearly wouldn’t allow a cat to fuck with him. Not even his own.
When he returned to the living room, he saw King curled up at Neil’s side, purring as he stroked the soft fur. It was an awfully pleasant sight.
“Can I help you with something?” Neil asked as soon as he noticed him.
“Yes,” Andrew said, placing the chair in front of Neil so he could elevate his leg. “Stay where you are and don’t bother me.” He gave him piercing glance and noticed how Neil slightly opened his lips, but Andrew didn’t wait for an answer he didn’t want to hear anyway. Instead, he got Neil a glass of water and some painkillers. The stuff they had given him at the hospital wouldn’t last forever.
“Thanks,” Neil said with a sigh. Instead of drinking, he lowered his gaze to the glass in his hands and mumbled, “I hate being like that.”
“Like what?”
“Useless.”
“You always are,” Andrew said unmoved. “But maybe you’ll think about this next time before you come up with a bullshit move like that.”
He saw how Neil wanted to argue, but cut him off with a sharp, “Don’t.”
“I don’t regret winning,” Neil said anyway and Andrew didn’t like the defiance in his eyes. At all.
He buried a hand in Neil’s hair and harshly pulled him closer, until there was merely an inch between their faces.
“Give me one reason why I shouldn’t throw you out right here and now.”
“You like me.”
“Wrong.”
Neil smiled and leaned closer for a kiss. Andrew allowed it for barely a second, before biting his lower lip and shoving him away.
“I’m preparing dinner now. Do me a favor and stop being a pain in the ass while I’m busy,” Andrew stated. “No getting up or walking around. Just call me if you need something.”
“I can – “
Andrew grabbed his collar to stop the nonsense from blurting out of his mouth, staring him down. “Don’t make me repeat myself,” he clarified, every syllable a warning.
Neil just returned his gaze, but didn’t argue back, so Andrew let go of him eventually and went to the kitchen.
Of course, Sir followed him immediately, because Neil spoiled these fur monsters beyond saving.
Whenever he was in the kitchen, he gave them a treat and Neil always looked so pleased watching them, it was hard to even be genuinely mad at him.
But Andrew wasn’t Neil, so he was immune to that never ending pleading for food. Even when Sir lured King into the kitchen too due to his permanent meowing and purring, doubling the effort, he wasn’t fooled.
Their bowl was still filled with plenty and Andrew proved it by shaking up the dry food.
“See that? It’s full, so eat that, you greedy monsters.”
It worked for the whole of two minutes to distract them, but when he added oil to the pan, the sizzling sound was enough to scare the cats away.
Andrew decided for an easy dish with fried chicken he cut into bite-sized pieces and rice. Something you could eat comfortably with only one functioning hand.
When he returned to the living room he caught Neil staring at his phone. Sir was sitting on his lap as if he owned the place, while King slept in a weird position on the windowsill. Business as usual.
“Here.” Andrew waited for Neil to look up to him and put the phone away, before handing him the bowl.
“Oh.” Neil’s face brightened. “Thank you.”
Andrew didn’t answer, but sat down at his side. He watched how Neil struggled to eat with an asshole cat on his lap and only one hand to use. It was a sorry sight.
Sir tried to get the bowl down by reaching out with his paw, while Neil held it up high in the air.
“Hey! That’s mine.” If he tried to be strict, he failed miserably. His voice was too soft and the smile on his face betrayed him.
He tried to lean forward in an attempt to get Sir moving, but the cat remained unimpressed, still trying to steal his food.
Neil laughed and turned his head to him, his arm still lifted up high. He was such an idiot.
Andrew didn’t bat an eyelash as he gave Sir a small but firm push to chase him away. It was a matter of a single seconds.
“Thanks for the help,” Neil said, still laughing softly, as he watched Sir with fond eyes leaving for the scratching post.
Andrew just shot him an unimpressed glance to show he was not amused by his stupidity, but Neil didn’t seem to mind.
“I asked Kevin how long it took until he started to train again, after his hand got broken” he began with a side-glance to his phone, digging his spoon into the rice. “He said – “
“I don’t care,” Andrew interrupted. He didn’t want to hear about this bullshit. “Kevin’s just as stupid as you are when it comes to Exy. If you dare to even think about touching a racquet any soon, I’m going to break your other wrist too.”
“You wouldn’t.”
“Try me.”
They were staring each other down, Neil with dissatisfaction written all over his face, while Andrew remained cold and unaffected, but Neil knew him well enough to get the hidden warning.
Neil was the first one to turn away eventually, sulking like a damn child, but Andrew couldn’t care less. He knew that idiot would get himself onto the court as soon as possible anyway, but he wouldn’t encourage him to be stupid.
They ate in silence for a while, with nothing but the TV giving some background noises. It was a documentary about whales and sharks. Nothing special, but less annoying than the rest.
When the bowls were emptied, the tension had died down again. Neil looked exhausted and leaned back with a silent sigh. Andrew observed him with watchful eyes, but couldn’t see any signs of pain, so he took a more comfortable position, propping himself against Neil’s uninjured side.
He crossed his arms, to not give the impression he was content with the situation, but Neil’s hand began to slowly tousle through his hair anyway. It had become a habit of him and was oddly soothing, but Andrew never told him and never would.
“I like this,” Neil said out of nowhere. The TV just showed a shark ripping a huge fish into bits, so he presumably didn’t mean that. Andrew gave him a bored side-glance.
“Being injured like that,” he explained, slightly lifting his left arm that still hung in a sling.
Andrew just stared at him, unblinking. “Did I miss something? As far as I can remember you didn’t hit your head.”
“I mean being injured like a normal person,” Neil said and smiled wistfully. “No guns or knives or torture. Just…” He gestured aimlessly with his right hand. “A normal sports injury for a normal person.”
“You aren’t normal, obviously.”
“I like where we are,” Neil continued his nonsense as if he didn’t listen to him. “And what we are. Thank you.”
“You have no idea how much I hate you,” Andrew said after a moment of silence, but there was no edge in his voice.
“I love you just the same.” Neil smiled that awful smile that made Andrew want to punch him. Softly. With his lips.
“You make me sick,” Andrew said. Then he pressed his palm against the back of Neil’s head and kissed him senseless.
Neil still had this habit of kissing like he could lose all of this at any given moment. It was intense. Greedy. Pleading. Grateful. Never enough and more than he ever hoped to gain.
Andrew knew that, but he wanted him to feel safe. Wanted to engrave this feeling of normality deep into his soul, until it wasn’t worth mentioning anymore. Until it was all he could remember.
And one day, he would. Andrew made it a silent promise.