Work Text:
Like her master, Ahsoka had always had a hard time meditating. She really tried, but especially after experiencing the “hurry up and wait” lifestyle necessary in the war, she found it difficult to just sit still and calm her mind. While Anakin was visiting Padme on Senatorial duty, she was using some of her precious alone time to practice meditation techniques, but it still didn’t come any easier to her. Sighing, Ahsoka flopped onto her back and tried to think of a solution. She knew if she went to Anakin with her troubles, he would understand, but he wouldn't be able to help her with this. Master Obi-Wan always had sage advice to offer when she asked, but the thought of revealing her vulnerability made her hesitate to reach out. However, Ahsoka couldn’t recall ever feeling judgment or disappointment when confiding him, so she reconsidered the option. Deciding that despite her fear of her grandmaster’s disappointment, he would be the most helpful for finding a solution. She slowly got up from the floor and headed for Obi-Wan’s quarters.
Once outside of Obi-Wan’s door, she raised her hand to knock, but paused right before her fist made contact. Guilt and trepidation settled in her gut and almost made her turn around and go back to her rooms. She swallowed and finally knocked, determined to go through with her plan. For a moment, she worried Obi-Wan was out, but then his door opened and Ahsoka was blinded by his bright, cheery smile. “Ahsoka! What a wonderful surprise! Please, come in, I’ll make some tea.” Ahsoka flashed him a tight smile and followed him into his small common area. “Is there something wrong, padawan?” Obi-Wan asked as he puttered about in the kitchenette. “Well, I was hoping that you might be able to help me with something. I’ve been having a really hard time meditating, and I can tell it's starting to affect me. No matter what I do, I just can’t get my mind to settle. Do you have any advice?” Ahsoka asked, nervously trailing off at the end. Obi-Wan hummed as he brought two steaming mugs into the common area, eyebrows furrowed in thought. “Well, from what I remember with Anakin, he always seemed to do better when he had something to pour his excess energy into. It’s a little trick called ‘active meditation.’ Sometimes focusing the mind on an activity is what is needed to bring clarity. You could try finding a small, repetitive task that you enjoy to do while you meditate. I bought Anakin a beginner’s droid-building kit and it worked wonders. Not so challenging that it would take all of his concentration, but enough that he would have something to center himself. You could try something like drawing, or dance? Whatever feels right to you.”
Anakin had never told her about that, but after witnessing his restless energy over the course of her apprenticeship, Ahsoka supposed it made sense. She took a sip of her tea as she mulled over Obi-Wan’s advice. Ahsoka wasn’t totally convinced that it would work, but ultimately decided that, out of respect and trust in Obi-Wan, she would at least try it. “I don’t really know what I would do, but I guess I could try it, Master. I’ve never heard of this before, does it really work? Is it--” she paused, searching for the right word, “-- allowed? ” Obi-Wan smiled fondly, patient and understanding as he answered her questions. “Oh yes, in fact many knights and masters practice both active and traditional meditation, depending on their current needs and state of mind. Many practice katas, but others have found the arts conducive to achieving peace and mindfulness. I--” He was interrupted by the shrill beeping of his comm on the other side of the room. Obi-Wan excused himself for a moment and went to check the message, shoulders sagging as he read it. “I’m afraid an emergency meeting has been called by the council, I have to go. You’re a bright young woman, I’m sure you’ll find an activity that feels right. Please don’t hesitate to come to me if you have any trouble.” Ahsoka nodded and followed him out the door. They parted ways down the corridor, and Ahsoka changed course from her quarters toward the entrance to the temple, hoping a walk would help clear her head.
Ahsoka strolled through the streets of Coruscant, contemplating her grandmaster’s words. She did always excel when working with her hands. Learning mechanics and ship repair with Anakin had been easy, her deft fingers learning the intricacies of the movements with ease. The more she thought about it, the more Obi-Wan’s advice made sense to her. He’d clearly only wanted to help her, and his voice had held none of the judgement and disappointment she had feared when she first knocked on his door. If her grandmaster thought this… “active meditation” would help, then she would give it her best try.
She knew some of the clones had taken up a form of weaving, making small accessories like socks and helmet liners with just a couple of sticks and some yarn. When she’d asked about it, they’d told Ahsoka it relaxed them and that it was the process that was important, the finished product was just a bonus. It certainly had an appeal, but Ahsoka couldn’t see herself finding much enjoyment out of fiddling with some sticks and string. Her thoughts drifted to her master, who seemed to always be in reach of some half-finished mechanical heap. Often during long, boring meetings she had noticed him quietly building and taking apart small mechanical components. Ahsoka enjoyed mechanics plenty, but a lot of her duties in the GAR involved ship and droid repair, and she wanted her meditation to be an escape from her day-to-day life, not really an extension of it.
Deep in her thoughts, Ahsoka almost didn’t see the event board as she passed by it. Most of the flyers were uninteresting-- some speeders for sale, a lost tooka notice, and war effort posters covered a majority of the board, however there was one advertisement in the corner that caught her eye. Free Beginner’s Pottery Class it read, in bold lettering at the top. On the bottom of the page was a comm frequency and information on where and when the class would be held. Memories of wandering the temple halls as a youngling, soaking up the beautiful art and artifacts on display quickly came to the forefront of her mind. She remembered staring in awe at the intricate designs and shapes of the vases and statues, amazed at the detail. Ahsoka checked the date on the flyer, smiling when she noticed that the class would be during her leave. Snapping a quick holo of the relevant information, she turned away from the event board and made her way back to the temple.
Senior padawans were allowed to come and go as they pleased during their free time, so while Ahsoka wasn’t technically sneaking out, it sure did feel like she was. She opted to take one of the lesser known exits in the temple, the knowledge of which had been passed down in her lineage specifically for troublemaking. Logically, she knew no one would care if they found out where she was going, but Ahsoka wasn’t quite ready for anyone to know about her potential new hobby yet. Soon she reached the end of the corridor and stepped out into the cool Coruscant night.
The rec center hosting the pottery class was only a few blocks away from the temple, so it wasn’t long before Ahsoka entered the small, modest building. She followed the small signs indicating where to find room 137, where the class would be held. Pausing outside of the door, she could hear quiet, relaxed chatter coming from inside. Ahsoka gathered herself and opened the door, scanning the room for an open workbench. Ahsoka found one near the door and walked quickly over to it and waited patiently for the class to begin, hoping she looked more confident and at ease than she really felt.
A few minutes later, a friendly Rhodian woman made her way to the front of the classroom and cleared her throat. A hush fell over the students, eager to receive instruction. “Hello everyone, I see we have some new faces, welcome. I am Meeqkrik Vunu, your teacher for tonight. This week, we’ll be making mugs. They are pretty easy to do, a perfect opportunity to get creative with your design. Your work tables are already cleaned and set up for you, so go ahead and grab some clay from the cabinet to begin.” Meeqkrik’s soft voice instantly put Ahsoka at ease. She reminded her of the Creche Masters at the Jedi temple-- approachable, understanding, and patient, genuinely happy to be here teaching her students. Ahsoka followed the others to an open cabinet on the left wall of the room and scooped up a handful of clay. Once everyone had their clay and settled back at their work benches, Meeqkrik began her instructions. The soothing cadence of her words helped Ahsoka relax, and soon she found herself enjoying the process. It was easy to get creative and let loose in the calm atmosphere of the little classroom. As her hands performed the small, repetitive tasks, Ahsoka’s thoughts flowed freely and she let them go into Force with an ease she hadn’t had since she was a youngling. Smiling to herself, Ahsoka realized that once again, Master Obi-Wan’s advice had been spot-on.
Once she had the basic structure of the mug done, Ahsoka sat back and tried to come up with how she wanted to design the mug. She looked around the room, analyzing what her peers had chosen to do with their mugs. Most were carving small motifs on the side, some abstract, some familiar shapes, like the tooka the young human in front of her chose. A twi’lek towards the front of the room had made the body of his mug mimic a tree trunk and shaped the handle to look like a leaf, which Ahsoka thought was pretty cool. The unique design of the twi’lek’s mug gave Ahsoka an idea, and she quickly turned to work on her mug with renewed vigor.
An hour or so later, Ahsoka gingerly carried her mug to the front of the room where Meeqkrik was patiently waiting for their finished pieces. “Ah, an ambitious creation. Very well done, miss…?” “Oh, Ahsoka is fine Ms. Vunu, thank you. Where should I put it?” Ahsoka blushed at the compliment. “Just find an empty spot here in the kiln. We’ll have a painting session on Taungsday if you can make it.” Meeqkrik answered, gesturing to the large oven-like structure in the corner of the room. Ahsoka nodded her thanks, and carefully set her mug on the tray inside of the kiln. She then headed back to the temple, excited to finish her project on Taungsday.
The next morning, Obi-Wan joined her for breakfast in the cafeteria. “Good morning, Ahsoka. Have you had a chance to try active meditation yet?” he asked. She grinned, “Actually, I have. The rec center hosts free pottery classes, I went to one last night. It really helped, thank you. The creative outlet really was perfect for sorting through my thoughts” “That’s wonderful, Ahsoka. I’m glad it helped. What did you learn in the class?” Ahsoka could hear the pride in his voice when he spoke, and she told him about her exciting night out.
Ahsoka counted down the hours until she could return to the rec center, eager to paint her little mug. When Taungday evening finally came, she raced out the temple entrance, a stark contrast to her exit just a few days prior. She couldn’t quite hide the smile that crept up on her face when the rec center was in view, and quickly made her way back to room 137. Meeqkrik had their mugs on the counter up front, and a few other students were already working on theirs. “Good evening Ahsoka, welcome back. Your mug is here on the left, and the paints are over in the cabinet next to the clay. Take all of the colors and time you need, we have the room until closing.” Meeqkrik said quietly, and Ahsoka thanked her and went to gather her paint. She grabbed black, gray, blue, and a dash of red, then brought them to the nearest bench and set to work. It took Ahsoka almost until closing to finish painting, the finer details of her design taking patience she didn’t know she still had. When she was done, she brought it back to the kildn one last time to set the paint. Meeqkrik assured her she could swing by to pick it up at any time that ten-day, and soon Ahsoka was walking back to the temple, enjoying the brisk Coruscant night.
While Anakin was at the Senate building again, Ahsoka left to pick up her mug. It’s unique and familiar shape made it easy to pick out on the table set out for the pottery class. She gingerly secured it in the satchel she brought with her and sped back to the temple, hoping to make it there before her Master was due back. Relieved when she didn’t see his speeder parked outside, Ahsoka scurried back to their rooms. She made it just a few moments before she heard Anakin’s boisterous voice outside, most likely continuing his debate with Knight Secura about who had the better master. The door clicked open and Ahsoka heard Anakin step into the room. She tried not to fidget where she sat on the battered but comfortable couch, her excitement palpable. Anakin finally noticed her as he walked into the room. ”Hey Snips, do anything fun while I was out?” he asked cheerily. Ahsoka beamed, “Actually, yeah. I was having some trouble meditating, so I asked Master Obi-Wan for advice. He suggested I try something called ‘active meditation,’ and it worked! I took a free pottery class over at the rec center, and I made this!” she said, brandishing the mug from her bag. “Active meditation, huh? Well I’m glad it helped. You did a good job with the mug, the resemblance is uncanny.” he chuckled. Indeed, it was. Ahsoka had painstakingly painted every detail she could of their favorite astromech, down to the mismatching panels just above the right strut. “Thanks, Skyguy. I figured, since Rex keeps stealing your favorite mug by accident, you could use this one instead. It certainly can’t be mistaken for anyone else’s.” Anakin gently took the mug, looking it over with the biggest smile she had ever seen. “I love it. You’re the best padawan I could ever ask for.” He set his present down on the end table and swept her up in a bone-crushing hug, which Ahsoka enthusiastically returned. “Thanks, Master. I love you too.”