Chapter Text
There were only a few reasons a man would prefer not to be held hostage by a cute little girl. A common one was when they were actually afraid for their lives. Logical for most folk; nobody wanted to die, and if they did, they would be lying.
Common logic did not apply to Childe, however. He wasn't afraid to die— in fact, he craved a glorious death in battle. So why was it then, that having a knife pointed to his neck filled him more with annoyance than glee?
"May I help you?" he asked.
The cloaked girl pushed the knife closer and spoke nothing. Her soulless golden eyes glared, yet the only thing Childe could think about was whether or not she was being selectively mute.
It was his day off— the first in a while. He didn't really have time to deal with grumpy kids. If the girl wanted to fight, she should do something first about that pouty expression on her face.
"You don't remember me?" the girl asked.
Childe sighed. "You're Lumine. We've met, and thanks for the flowers by the way. They're lovely— but not as much that bump you gave to me on the head. Without it, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have remembered."
"Oh?"
"...May. I. Help. You?" Childe repeated.
"If you remember, then that makes this easy." Playing the knife in her hands, Lumine puffed out her chest— the alpha female asserting dominance over her quarry. She grinned like a feral beast, her voice monotone as ever. "Show me around."
"I don't babysit."
"Sure you do."
"Nuh-uh."
"You'd do it for your sister," Lumine said, blinking with fake puppy-dog eyes. "Why am I any different?"
Real mature, Childe silently retorted. Wasn't this girl supposed to be the famed Abyss Princess that tried to kill him one time? "Why me?"
Lumine answered his question with cold, calculated efficiency. "You're still here. You know who I am and you know Liyue Harbor. I don't have to worry about disguising myself."
"And what makes you think you can get away with this?"
"Simple." Lumine smiled again— the very same cruel smile she gave on the battlefield. "You tattle, I'll kill you. You know that I can, and it still wouldn't convince me to go see my brother."
She poked the knife on his chin until it drew the tiniest bit of blood. Her words dripped with them.
"I own you. Live with it."
"..."
Childe closed his eyes. A minute of silence passed before he started to walk away and gestured for her to follow.
"...Just like that?" Lumine asked.
"Pretty much."
"Why?"
"It's midday," Childe said. "You're grumpy, demanding, and impatient even when you usually aren't. That tells me there's someplace you really want to go to right now— and if you're anything like your brother, then that place is…"
He smirked and pointed to her stomach. Right on cue, it rumbled loudly.
It was glorious.
A surprisingly embarrassed blush reddened Lumine's cheeks. Composure shot, she looked at him with desperation in her eyes as if pleading he forget what he had just heard. Childe laughed.
"I'm not—"
Her stomach grumbled even louder. For a stoic princess, she sure was honest with herself— or at least, her tummy was.
"Right on the mark," Childe said between gasps. "I saw you sniffing around the restaurants earlier. Didn't have any Mora on you so you figured you'd extort the richest and easiest guy you could get your mitts on. Quite predictable of you, Princess."
Lumine covered her face with her scarf, her cheeks flushing beet-red at being found out. She growled at him.
"C' mon, I'm hungry, too," Childe said. winking. If he waited anymore, Lumine might seriously try biting his head off. He gestured for her to follow him again, this time with a gentlemanly flair. "I'll show you a full course."