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“Shit!”
The sudden curse echoed in the hotel suite, followed immediately a soft ping and a hearty thud. There was the screech of furniture legs against hardwood floors, another thud, and a bout of swearing so empathetic that it would have made an old lady faint.
“…You okay, Jigen?” Lupin called, after a brief pause to see if anyone else was going to ask first. He pushed his glasses to the top of his head and lifted his fountain pen so he didn’t smudge the writing that filled the page in front of him, blinking as he glanced over his shoulder.
“’m fine.” Jigen crawled out from under the dining table, rubbing his head. There was a faint red mark above his eyebrow, his hat sitting on the chair he had just vacated. “Just dropped the damn ring and it almost went down the vent.”
“Hey, don’t go denting the filigree—that’s real gold!” Lupin scowled in mock severity, still half-focused on the letter in front of him. His scowl deepened as he felt himself losing track of whatever thought he’d been about to put down next. “What would Clarisse say if we sent her a damaged gift, huh?”
“Absolutely nothing? We could send her one of those little plastic things you keep wining handfuls of at the arcade, and she’d love it because it’s from you. It’s Laetitia who’d scold you.”
“Speaking of, did we get that, that tooth-thing appraised?”
“Yes.” Goemon put the item in question on the desk. It was wrapped meticulously in bubble wrap and clear tape, the corners neatly folded in. “Legitimate, and old enough where Laetitia should find it interesting. Not rare enough to raise questions as to where she acquired it.”
“Emmy?”
“Got ‘er the best hard drive on the market,” Jigen said, hefting a small box in one hand. With the other, he tucked an ornate ring into a silk handkerchief. “Saleswoman was starting to get real suspicious we were spending this much on something we knew nothing about, though, had to tell ‘er it was for our daughter.”
“We?” Lupin attached the appraiser’s note to the bottom of the fossil. “I thought you went by yourself?”
“Pops showed up. He was tailing me throughout the store and he grabbed me just when the woman came back with all the different choices and a security guard. It was the first thing I could think of to prevent a scene.”
“He went along with it?” Goemon’s expression was one of puzzlement as he took the hard drive and placed it next to an already labelled envelope on the coffee table.
“’course he did. Soon as I name-dropped Ami he went sappy. Played it better than any of you could have, that’s for sure. Did you know he has a picture of her in his wallet?”
“Wait, you’re telling me that you and Pops were playing doting parents and I seriously missed that?” Lupin swung around in his chair to goggle at Jigen, scandalized. “I can’t believe you didn’t say anything until now! I’m gonna have to hack those security cameras at the store!”
“What makes you think I was standing in view of the cameras?”
“…Spoilsport.” Lupin sank down into his chair and nearly sulked over the unfairness of it all. “I bet you got caught by at least one.”
“No one’s stopping you from checking. Just finish that damn letter first, or we’re never getting this all mailed tomorrow.” Jigen grinned, pen gripped in his teeth, and propped his elbows on the table as Lupin sighed dramatically.
Silence overtook the suite once more as they all went back to their individual projects, Jigen and Lupin scribbling away at their respective correspondence while Goemon held the address book open for Fujiko. For several minutes there was nothing but the scratching of pens and the squeak of a marker, until Lupin slapped his hands down decisively on the desk and made everyone jump.
“Done,” he caroled, folding the paper into thirds as a smile spread across his face. “Done, done, done!”
“Stop bragging and find something else to do,” Jigen grumbled, blotting a glob of ink with a tissue. His own paper was still clearly half empty. “Something quiet.”
Lupin just stuck his tongue out at his friend, and finished addressing Clarisse’s envelope with a happy flourish. He leaned back in his chair, kicking his feet up onto the desk—carefully avoiding the fossil at the edge—and allowed himself a yawn. Letter day was longer than some heist plans, if he was being honest. Especially since no one was allowed to smoke during it; they didn’t want the girls’ things to show up stinking of nicotine.
Making sure everything was organized was a lot of work. They had to keep on top of address changes, shipping costs, and packaging, not to mention making sure everyone got the right gift. It would never do to mix up the presents.
“Okay, so who are we done, anyway?” The thief opted to think out loud, smirking at an annoyed Jigen as he held up his fingers and ticked off the names. “Clarisse, yes; Laetitia, yes; Emmy...wait, what about Lorensa?!”
“I got Lorensa’s gift,” Fujiko said with a dainty sniff, standing up to place a sealed, padded mailer down by Jigen’s elbow and pushing Lupin back down into his chair. “It’s one thing to leave you boys in charge of the girls, but Lorensa is a lady and she ought to have a lady shop for her.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Jigen snorted, and chewed absently on the end of his cheap ballpoint pen as he put the package next to the wrapped box for Clarisse. “Did you write her letter, too?”
“Of course. Are you still working on Laetitia’s?”
“Had to start over, went and put down the wrong name for that tomb we were in and I couldn’t cross it out.”
“If you left more room between the lines you could have.” Fujiko wandered between the table and the desk, long nails idly tapping on all the presents. She patted Lupin on the cheek, who was sulking again over not knowing what they’d gotten for ‘the princess’, and picked up the finished letters. She paused at the one for Emmy, and looked up. “Goemon, you didn’t write any of these?”
“No.” The samurai blushed faintly from where he was sitting on the couch. “It did not seem advisable. I do not have the same ease of conversation possessed by Lupin or yourself.”
“I don’t know, that was a good bit of flattery.” Fujiko laughed, leaning over to twirl a piece of Goemon’s hair around her finger. The colour in his cheeks immediately went from light pink to redder than her acrylics, and Jigen took pity on him and flicked a wadded-up piece of tape at Fujiko’s back.
“Leave ‘im alone, he put did some of that paper-folding thing for all the girls, instead.”
“Jeez, you’re so crude. It’s called origami.”
“Origami?” Lupin perked up from the desk, his sour mood evaporating in an instant even as Fujiko and Jigen started griping at each other. Looking over at Goemon, who was practically radiating heat he was blushing so hard, he bounced to his feet. “When did you learn how to do that? You can teach me, right?”
“Well—”
“Hey, if you’re going to show him, I want to learn too!” Fujiko broke off from her argument so fast that Jigen rolled his eyes, and she tugged on Goemon’s sleeve as she pouted prettily. “You wouldn’t leave me out, right?”
“I want to make a fox!” Lupin grinned, throwing himself onto the couch. “You can show me how to make a fox, can’t you? Fujiko can make a cat!”
Goemon—with his chattering, puppy-dog-eyed friends clinging to either side of him as they blithely decided what they were going to make—looked pleadingly to Jigen for a rescue. But all the gunman did was toss over a stack of paper with a smirk. It landed on the table with a dull thunk, and Jigen touched a vague salute to the brim of his hat.
“Sorry, but I could really use the peace to finish writin’ this. Good luck!”