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Everything is shrouded in shades of orange, a luminous type of orange that one sees during sunsets. God, he’s beautiful, Skeppy thinks as he looks the man, the last orange rays of the sun highlighting his features, he looks like an angel, blazing and so bright that Skeppy couldn’t look away. He’s laughing at something Skeppy said and sight makes the younger man’s heart ache in a way that is almost overwhelming. The man finally trains his jade eyes at the him, still recovering from his high and a giddy smile plastered at his face.
“Skeppy, oh my goodness,” Bad heaves, running a hand on his caramel colored hair, “Why did you down that hot sauce?”
“Because you told me to!” He hears himself say, he could almost remember the feeling of the numbness in his tongue,
“I didn’t think you’d actually do it dunderhead!” Bad wheezes, “Your face was so red!”
“You’re a sadist,” Skeppy huffs, “I was clearly suffering and you just laughed at me.”
“Oh I’m sorry for laughing ‘Geppy,” Bad smiles smugly, not looking sorry at all.
Skeppy was staying with Bad for a couple days, they had decided to go out for lunch and head out to the shore. Skeppy took a packet of hot sauce from the restaurant they ate at with him and being a little crazy, he asked Bad if he should down the whole thing, Bad said yes. It looked harmless, boy was he wrong.
“Yeah, yeah,” Skeppy hums, glaring at Bad playfully.
They stay quiet for a bit, listening to the rolling waves and the occasional squawk of a seagull from the distance, but the quiet did not last long, as Skeppy gets easily bored, he turns to Bad.
“Bad.”
“Hm?” Bad looks at him questioningly.
“Mr. Badboyhalo, I have a question for you,” Skeppy said in his best talk show voice.
“Yeah? What is it Mr. ‘Geppy?” Bad smirks, clearly amused with Skeppy’s antics.
“Did you…” Skeppy pretends to be deep in thought, “Did you have fun with me?”
Bad’s face shifts from amusement to softness.
“Course I did you muffinhead,” He chuckles softly before giving Skeppy a beautiful smile, “I always do.”
And suddenly the world stills, Bad’s content smile was frozen and so was the world around him. The stillness sends Skeppy back to reality, a droplet of water falls next to Bad’s smiling face and Skeppy wipes it with his thumb. The phone he had in front him was old, he remembers sitting by the rocky shore, filming Bad with the old thing around the summer of 2022. The moment was too personal to share to the rest of the world. It wasn’t included in the vlog. Skeppy wishes he could go back there, by the sea, sitting next to his best friend, both of them insanely happy despite having an ass full of sand.
He wishes that he could freeze that moment with Bad, to be young and happy forever. Perhaps, in a way, his wish did come true, just not in the way he wanted. A couple of days after Skeppy visited Bad, the latter had got into an accident, and he didn’t make it. Skeppy remembers it all clearly, he was editing videos on his bed when he receives the call from Bad’s sister. At first, he was stunned, next thing he did was call Bad in hopes of assurance, that this was just some cruel elaborate joke played by his sweet best friend, but his best friend didn’t reply.
He almost didn’t come to the funeral, he couldn’t bear to think, that Bad, kind, lively, and amazing Bad, was in a casket, still and devoid of life. But he had to, he and Dream were the last people to leave the cemetery, the sleek headstone was cold and dull and everything that Bad wasn’t. That was his breaking point, his legs gave and he sat in the grass, one hand gripping his dark strands while the other covered his face in an attempt to cease his uncontrollable sobs, Dream sits next to him, hugging him from the side, the blonde rests his head on Skeppy’s shoulders, jade eyes leaking as it stared at the headstone.
He didn’t offer Skeppy verbal reassurance, what was there to say? Things weren’t okay, and they probably won’t be for a while. He lost himself, for a time. He took a break from streaming and YouTube because every now and then he would unconsciously find himself calling out for Bad, only to be hit by silence and the dawning realization that his friend is gone, he’d go quiet after that and his eyes would glaze over in sadness, he looks pitiful, he seen the way he looks on the clips. He really tried to pretend things were as they were, but they weren’t, there were no friendly banters anymore, no more screaming and the constant scolding 'Language!', no more, ‘muffinheads’ and breathless laughter, no more affectionate late night calls and texts, no more Bad. He just functions, he just exists, he says he’s okay, but he’s not. Eventually he gets better, his family was there for him, and so were his friends, but he knows he’ll never be okay, and that the gaping hole left in his heart by Bad would never be filled. The phone in his hand turns off, the orange screen turning pitch black, he could see his reflection on the dark screen.
His eyes were puffy and he looked older, he hadn’t shaved and he had very faint lines in his face. He’s in his late thirties, it’s been so long since Bad left. He wonders what Bad would look like if he was still here, would he have crow’s feet? Would he already have grey hair contrasting to his mousy strands? Would he have beautiful smile lines? Skeppy will never know, because Bad was frozen in time, a man forever to remain in his twenties.
He turned the phone on again, tapping on the passcode. He was once again greeted by Bad bathed in orange light, smile as content and happy as ever.
“I miss you,” He mutters pitifully, sniffling as his eyes start to water again, “I always do.”