Work Text:
Hermes was a lot of things.
He was a god. Of commerce, merchants, thieves, and travellers. Of fertility and shepherds. Of trickery. He was a messenger, a psychopomp. He was the fastest god in all of Olympus.
He thought pretty highly of himself at times, and really, he was certain he was allowed to! He had a lot of jobs, and he did them all well, thank you very much.
Hermes knew what others thought of him, too, though. He was fast- talked fast, walked fast, and thought fast. That's how he knew what other people thought about him. That’s how he knew a lot of things, really. Pieced things together before anyone else told him what was going on. Everyone else was so unbearably slow. It wasn’t his fault he couldn’t focus on them when they went on and on and on. He was a busy guy, he had a lot to do, and it was usually all stuff he knew about anyway.
He supposed it made sense. Some of the stuff he knew wasn’t stuff everyone really wanted to go around, y’know? Gods were a testy bunch sometimes. Most of the time. Really, though, it was too easy to figure some of these things out. One just had to listen- and sure, Hermes wasn’t great at listening all the time, but he wasn’t interested all the time. He was fine when he was interested. Besides, it wasn’t like anyone else did a good job of not talking, anyway. Just talked and talked and talked, all day long. Most of it was boring, but Hermes was good at listening to the stuff that wasn’t boring.
It was easy to figure things out by how people talked about them. Figure things out by listening to the way one talked about someone else, or even how they talked to the someone else- er, the other person? Whatever, he knew what he meant.
It was like how everyone on Olympus talked about any chthonic god, really. It was like how Posiedon talked about Artemis never being able to ‘attract a mate.’ Or how she would respond, a sarcastic bite that always seemed to go over his head (unless Posiedon was ignoring it on purpose, which wouldn’t surprise Hermes, really).
It was like how they all talked to him. The times he tended not to think as highly of himself.
Which, maybe that wasn’t entirely fair. They didn’t all talk to him that way, and it wasn’t even all the time. Besides, they were family. That meant they cared. That meant they… cared. Yeah?
Yeah.
No. Well, yes and no. He didn’t know. Hermes was bored of the drama in Olympus. Back and forth and back and- it seemed like they did care sometimes, but didn’t care other times. It was exhausting- and that was saying a lot, he was Hermes! He was the fastest god in Olympus, he didn’t have time to be tired! Moving, moving, moving, always on the go- talking to everyone, learning all sorts of things- but dealing with his family drained him. Hah! It’d be hilarious, if it weren’t him. Them. Everything.
But it was fine. He had his work, and it kept him busy. And Hermes loved it! Loved travelling, being on the move, seeing everything. Loved his job, loved that it kept him away from all the drama. Loved the people he met.
And, well, eventually there was one specific person he met that he… loved. But he couldn’t really get into that. But, gods above, he did like thinking about it. About him, really. How they met, it made him smile just thinking about it. And everything they got up to-! Well, that was, hah- he’d spent plenty of nights giggling to himself about it all over a bottle of something or other, and… wasn’t that sad? Didn’t even spend that time with… Hermes huffed, shaking his head.
Hermes wasn’t always a fan of how fast his thoughts went. They got ahead of him at times, too sad, didn’t like that. That’s when he knew to pick up his feet again, get moving, work or not. Got into weird moods, so he went to bother whoever, wherever, whatever. Usually not the same person over and over, just some random traveller or thief or… well, whatever caught his attention, really. It happened from time to time, and he’d figured out how to manage it the best he could over time. It wasn’t a routine, really, he just found something to distract himself.
Eventually, he sort of did find himself in a bit of a routine with it.
Hermes didn’t really mean to go to Charon that first time, but he was close to the temple as it was, and he… he didn’t want to think right then. And he just liked to talk to Charon, and Charon didn’t seem to mind talking to him.
Hermes hoped he didn’t mind.
The unfortunate thought snuck up on him as he entered the temple above the Underworld, the large stone door opening and closing behind him with little effort. He was thankful for that, at least. The slightest resistance, and Hermes wasn’t sure if he would actually go through with it. But being here was usually part of his job, and he’d really only struggled to open it his first time. He was used to the door now, almost comforting in its familiarity, the way it rumbled as it moved.
Hermes wasn’t sure he was totally with it as he approached Charon’s setup in the temple, only partially aware the chthonic being was there, despite partially being here because of him in the first place. He was only drawn out of his odd reverie by the boatman’s low greeting, snapping to attention. He grinned easily, offering a short wave.
“Hey, boss, how’s it going? Good to see you. No souls right now, just stopping by to visit,” Hermes said, injecting his voice with the usual upbeat tone it carried. He continued to float nonchalantly about, watching the purple smoke float out from Charon’s mouth, swirling out from under his hat and up, dissipating above him. It was almost hypnotic, comforting in the shapeless patterns it formed.
“Hhrraaa…?” Charon groaned, looking up at Hermes, bringing his attention back to the older god once more. Apparently he’d zoned out again, was being too quiet. Hah, imagine that, Hermes being too quiet! He could practically hear his father’s voice saying just that right now. Apparently (again, lots of 'apparently's right now, huh) the bitter face he was making was more than imaginary. Charon raised a hand to him, trying to grab his attention and bring him to stand properly on the ground.
Hermes acquiesced, eyes on Charon as he finally touched down. He felt heavy, that stupid, tired feeling weighing on him again. He could swear there was a look of concern in Charon’s eye, but- why would he care, his thoughts hissed, before he could think otherwise. That was dumb, Charon was his friend. Of course he cared. Like his family was supposed to, right? The wings on the sides of his heads twitched as he shook the thought from his head, smiling again.
“Sorry about that, guess I’m just a bit tired tonight, old man- don’t you worry about it. Long day! You wouldn’t believe the stuff they’ve been getting up to on Olympus lately, and Zeus has me delivering so many letters to so many women. You know how he is!” Hermes quickly spat, trying to seem like his usual self. Charon’s hands settled back on his oar and he chuckled lowly, well aware of what the younger god’s father got up to. The sound of his laughter always did something to Hermes’ stomach, actually managing to lift his spirits for a moment. Aphrodite would laugh if she could see him now.
He fell into a bit of a rhythm after that, rambling about everything he could think of, and nothing at the same time. Charon would reply in his own ways, low groaning and chuckling at the appropriate intervals, as it were. Each laugh seemed to make Hermes’ heart flutter faster than his wings, a noise he was sure he’d be thinking about long after this interaction.
Hermes left after some time, actually feeling better after their conversation. It was nice. He carried a warm feeling with him after that, a smile on his face long after he left the temple, long after he left Charon.
The second time he returned was probably when it became a routine. Hermes found he didn’t really mind having someone to turn to when he was feeling… like that. He started bringing bottles of nectar when he went to see Charon in his downtime, the niggling feeling he may be bothering Charon worming its way into his thoughts somehow.
If he was, Charon never gave any indication. Hermes didn’t know if he would prefer it this way, or have Charon actually tell him.
Either way, he enjoyed spending his time drinking nectar with Charon and whiling away the hours with whatever errant thought that came to mind. It beat wandering around, trying to ignore himself until he found something to do. It… well, it actually helped him feel better a lot of the time, too. He didn’t know how to tell Charon any of this. He wasn’t sure he ever wanted to. But Charon welcomed his company, warm in ways Hermes wasn't sure he thought chthonic gods were capable of. And gods have mercy, if that didn't do things to poor Hermes' heart...
Hermes wasn't sure if Charon would ever feel the same way about him, but he still wanted to bring him nice things. After nectar, it wasn't too terribly hard for him to get his hands on ambrosia, really, and that was precisely the nice thing he wanted to share with Charon.
So, that was how Hermes came to be spending the last several hours that fine day. Or night. He wasn't entirely sure what time he'd shown up, really. He just knew he had some free time, so… Why not spend it with a good bottle of ambrosia and his close friend- er, professional associate- Charon. Lying in Charon’s boat, Hermes chattered on and on about whatever came to mind, mostly the hectic activities that never seemed to end on Olympus, as he tended to. Charon would listen, amused by the various anecdotes Hermes shared, adding his own thoughts every so often, as he tended to do.
Hermes could talk at length with little provocation, but after a bottle of ambrosia and the comfort of Charon's company, he tended to be a bit looser lipped. It bordered on unthinking at times, his dialogue, but it arguably was spurred on by his love of talking and his love of hearing Charon respond.
“Speaking of Aphrodite,” Hermes interjected into his own rambling, a tangent likely born from some previous tangent, and so on, as the conversations tended to go. The ambrosia had him feeling like he was just this side of tipsy- like alcohol might loosen up a mortal- basking in the warmth of Charon and the conversation as they passed the bottle back and forth. Charon's expression as he produced the bottle- oh, Hermes didn't ever think he'd forget it.
“You’ll never guess what she’s been getting up to lately! Well, maybe you could,” Hermes laughed, almost a giggle, “But she’s been trying to play- or, I suppose, just has been playing matchmaker lately, it’s been hilarious to watch. It’s mostly mortals, really, and some of them have really been getting into drama out there. Maybe that’s what’s got Zeus sending so many letters himself as of late, seen some of the pretty ladies Aphrodite has been messing with.” Hermes rolled his eyes, amused with his own speculation. He had no idea, really. Unless it was important, he barely followed what his family got up to these days; he just knew Zeus had been sending extra letters lately, giving Hermes more work to do. He let a hand drift up lazily, interrupting the swirl of smoke coming from Charon, watching as the purple smog laced through his fingers. It was warm too, like Charon, feeling almost smooth as it slipped past his hand. He was focused more on that than he was his words as he continued on.
“And, funniest of all I think, she thinks she can play matchmaker with me! Says she knows I’ve caught feelings for someone, can smell it a mile away- well, she didn’t say that exactly, but it was pretty much that,” Hermes was basically full on rambling at this point, content to turn his brain off now and just keep speaking. He missed Charon’s look, the way he tilted his head slightly at what he’d been saying.
“And, really, that’s ridiculous, isn’t it? I have too much work to do, too much, and she thinks there’s someone I’ve got feelings for? I mean, wouldn’t I be the first to know if I had feelings for anyone? Really, now, really- besides, I don’t even think that h… uh, well. You know what I mean, partner,” Hermes was really about to say he didn’t think the other person would even reciprocate, and wouldn’t that just contradict everything he’d said a moment before! Haha… Denial? What-
“But I doubt she’d listen,” Hermes barreled on thoughtlessly, the warm feeling slipping, “regardless of what I say, so does it matter? Who even listens to me talk in the first place," well, hang on a minute, this was getting too real, "no one on Olympus for sure! You talk too fast, Hermes, slow down, Hermes, they just started tuning me out at some point, huh?” He’d just meant to make a joke, but his mouth got ahead of him. Maybe it had been weighing on him recently, but he hadn’t meant to bring it up, especially not like this.
Charon placed a hand on Hermes’ shoulder suddenly, startling him out of his nervous rambling and thoughts. When had he sat up? Hermes blinked, staring into Charon’s eye.
Such a bright purple. He’d started noticing the color a lot more, after meeting the boatman.
There was something in his gaze, something Hermes didn’t want to dwell on. Didn’t want to think about. Didn’t want to get his hopes up.
“You listen. You always have,” Hermes said without thinking, soft and… Charon removed his hand, Hermes' shoulder feeling as if it were burning where Charon’s grip had been. Charon looked as if he was about to say something and Hermes felt anxiety rise in him. He did his best not to talk over Charon, he didn’t want to do that to the only person who never did that to him. But he panicked, suddenly couldn’t sit still, feared he had said too much, feared how Charon might respond-
“Sorry about that, boss, I- I have to get back to work, you take care now!”
And with that, he fled.
Or, tried to. Charon stopped him, grabbed his wrist, turned him around. Hermes stared back at him, nervous, heart beating as fast as his wings. He didn’t know why he was so nervous so suddenly, didn't know why he felt like he might be sick. He didn't know why he'd said any of that, and really, he didn't want to see Charon's pity, or rejection, or- anything. But Charon's grip on his wrist was firm, leaving no room to try to wiggle his way out of this.
"Sorry, partner, I don't know what got into me there," Hermes laughed, an anxious sound, "Shouldn't have dumped that all on you, I get it. Guess I've been letting work get to me again, really, you'd think I should be better at, well, not letting it get to me. I should be off, though, I've got, um-" Charon finally cut him off, his groan a resounding noise that brokered no room for argument.
"Hhrnnn, hheeehhh… nngghhhhh," Charon said at length, looking pointedly at Hermes. Hermes, in turn, just stared back. His mind refused to decipher what Charon said- or, perhaps, he understood but couldn't process it. Hermes wasn't sure what his face looked like just then, but his heart was full of so many things, he just-
Charon gently pulled him closer, and Hermes let him. His violet gaze was soft, and Hermes was almost close enough to breathe in the smoke that crept from Charon's mouth. His grip found Charon's robes and he took fistfulls of the fabric, hear thudding painfully in his chest. He almost wondered if Charon could hear it for a moment.
"You mean that, boss…? Charon?" Hermes asked, uncharacteristically soft. Charon nodded, once, firm and without hesitation.
Hermes all but melted in Charon's grip at that, leaning in and embracing the taller god, lost in the feeling of his arms, the sound of Charon's jewelry as he wrapped his arms around Hermes as well.
They stayed like that for a long moment, just taking in the feeling of being close. Hermes breathed deep, the scent of incense, smoke, the Styx- the scent of Charon filling him.
Hermes pulled back just enough to look up at Charon, almost clinging to the back of his robes. Charon just held him, looking down at him. He breathed out, and Hermes breathed in.
It felt like the first breath of fresh air he'd had in centuries. It was smoke in appearance, but the similarities just about ended there. Breathing Charon in felt better than drinking ambrosia. Being so wholly surrounded by him, Hermes hadn't felt this safe since… gods, he didn't know when. But here, now- it was enough.
Watching the smoke leave him as he exhaled, the smoke that normally left Charon, Hermes was struck with the dangerous thought that that feeling could become addicting. And, well- Hermes thought he wouldn't mind that.
Carefully, Hermes moved, not wanting Charon to let go of him. He reached up, hands resting on Charon's face, tracing the gaunt features with his fingers. He'd have let his thumb brush against Charon's bottom lip, had the chthonic being actually had one. As it was, he just let one of his hands hover by his chin as the other wound around the back of Charon's neck.
Hermes half dragged Charon down to him, half pulled himself up, finally pressing his lips to Charon's… lack of lips? He wasn't focused on the specifics then, just pressing himself against Charon, kissing him like his life depended on it.
Hermes wasn't focused on much then, only vaguely aware of what he was doing. Charon guided them so they could sit so Hermes wouldn't topple the both of them over. That would be a way to ruin the mood, falling into the Styx together. This wasn't really how he'd pictured things going, but now that he was here, he wouldn't trade it for anything.
Charon just kept holding Hermes, not able to properly kiss back, but encouraging the smaller god on top of him. Hermes sat atop Charon, strong legs straddling his lap. The boatman's hands were solid, grounding, holding Hermes hips. Hermes was slow to pull away, remaining close even after he broke the kiss off.
"...I love you," He breathed, hardly a whisper. More of Charon's smoke escaped his lips, a sensation that left Hermes feeling almost drunk. He wanted to keep drinking from Charon for as long as the Stygian being would let him, his own personal ambrosia. Charon groaned lowly in response, and Hermes knew what he was saying before he even finished.
Charon loved him too.