Chapter Text
The 10 grader's (shithole) groupchat
Chat name: AREA 51 OUTCASTS
Members:
Aether: AETHEReal
Lumine: bad bitch
Xingqiu: Fucking Fushoji
Chongyun: Popsicle stick
Fischl: DE PRINZESSIN
Noelle: best girl＼(^ω^＼)
Xiangling: Im a 5 star michelin
Xinyan: flaming homosexual
Barbara: wannabe idol
Bennett: dying™️
Razor: bark bark mf
[AREA 51 OUTCASTS]
7:53 am
[AETHEReal, bad bitch, best girl＼(^ω^＼), Fucking Fushoji, flaming homosexual, Im a 5 star michelin, popsicle stick, and wannabe idol is online]
AETHEReal:
MORNIN GAYS AND HOMOSEXUALS!!
Im a 5 star michelin:
Umm good morning??
Fucking Fushoji:
And you decided to only greet us now because...
Where even are you?
AETHEReal:
wdym where am I???
Im literally at home getting ready for classes
wait...
OH SHIT
ITS FUCKING 7:55 ALREADY WKSHSIWJSKAJS
WHY DIDNT ANYONE WAKE ME???
flaming homosexual:
uhh do we look like ur fucking alarm or smtng??
AETHEReal:
OKAY THEN WHY DIDNT LUMINE WAKE ME
bad bitch:
BITCH I AM NOT UR PERSONAL ALARM CLOCK???
I AM NOT OBLIGED TO TAKE CARE OF UR STUPID LAZY ASS
AETHEReal:
okay girlie calm ur freaking yeezys
ANYWAYS IM GON BE LATE SO IM GONNA GO AND TRY SHOWERING WHILE EATING IN LESS THAN 2 MINUTES
I AM SPEED
popsicle stick:
sure dude manifesting that for you
AETHEReal:
if i use toothpaste instead of chocolate spread for my toast does that count as toothbrushing
Im a 5 star michelin:
WTFSJSJSKSJAKAJ
AETHER NO OMYGOD
bad bitch:
eww why am i related to you??
best girl＼(^ω^＼):
umm pls dont do that I am concerned for your sanity
AETHEReal:
what sanity never had one
popsicle stick:
bro no dont do it for the love of morax
AETHEReal:
Too lare alwsdy dud it
FUICK MY MOUTSH IS BURINGIN SND COLD AT THE SSME TIMR IS TJAT EBEN POSIBLE
bad bitch:
bro r u okay??
AETHEReal:
NO
bad bitch:
okay gud
[bark bark mf is online]
bark bark mf:
bRUH-
[bark bark mf is offline]
Im a 5 star michelin:
THE WAY RAZOR SAID ONE WORD AND THEN LEFT
AETHEReal:
IY STILK STINFS
I THINJ I PYT TOO MUCJ TOOTHPADTE
best girl＼(^ω^＼):
how much toothpaste did you use exactly?
Fucking Fushoji:
Well he did use toothpaste as toast spread so maybe like half the tube
My Gods Aether did you not think this through?
bad bitch:
aether doesnt think cuz he doesnt have a brain wbk
AETHEReal:
THOS IS CYBERPULYING
IT SRILL HURTS
I MIGTH CRY
OR DEI
flaming homosexual:
or both
bad bitch:
pls both
AETHEReal:
YALL FAEK
EBEN NY OEN SISTER IS DAKE
bad bitch:
whos dake??
wannabe idol:
maybe he meant drake?
flaming homosexual:
ew no not drake
[DE PRINZESSIN is online]
DE PRINZESSIN:
I have arrived!
And I am announcing that I have backread in the conversation and am currently basking with amusement at the unfortunate Aether's tomfoolery
Might I say I have never laughed this vibrantly in my entire years of existence. I am entirely grateful for the entertainment.
[DE PRINZESSIN is offline]
Im a 5 star michelin:
LMAO FISCHL PERFECT TIMING
bad bitch:
oh to laugh vibrantly at aethers tomfoolery
oh wait i am fufufufu~
wannabe idol:
fischl's choice of words are always so amusing ^-^
AETHEReal:
BYE I HATE IT HERE
IM LEAVING
Fucking Fushoji:
Well you better or else your ass is gonna miss the morning bell
AETHEReal:
okay okay mom jeez
[AETHEReal is offline]
Fucking Fushoji:
Okay good
Its already 8 am so bye guys
see you later in class I guess
[Fucking Fushoji is offline]
popsicle stick:
see you qiu owo
[popsicle stick is offline]
Im a 5 star michelin:
SIMP!
aanyways see you gays later byee~
wannabe idol:
you mean *gays
oh wait nvm haha
[Im a 5 star michelin, and wannabe idol is offline]
best girl＼(^ω^＼):
okay bye guys
also pls make an effort and jot down notes this time
Ive had enough of you all asking for my notes hmph
bad bitch:
Im so sorry my queen never again<3
best girl ＼(^ω^＼):
good :]
[bad bitch, and best girl＼(^ω^＼) is offline]
flaming homosexual:
aight peace out yall✌️😗
[flaming homosexual is offline]
[dying™️ is online]
dying™️:
lmao what did i miss
apparently a lot oof
[dying™️ is offline]
[8:07 am]
***
[AREA 51 OUTCASTS]
9:37am
[bad bitch, dying™️, Fucking Fushoji, flaming homosexual, Im a 5 star michelin, popsicle stick, is online]
Fucking Fushoji:
HELP I CAN LITERALLY SMELL AETHER'S TOOTHPASTE BREATH FROM WHERE IM SITTING
HE USED THAT MUCH TOOTHPASTE
[AETHEReal is online]
AETHEReal:
AT LEAST MY BREATH IS FRESH NON OF YOU CAN RELATE
bad bitch:
well i do wish i wasnt related to you
[bark bark mf is online]
bark bark mf:
LMAO BURN
[bark bark mf is offline]
dying™️:
LMAO RAZOR COME BACK
1m a 5 star michelin:
can razor like stop doing that ksjakswjskka
bad bitch:
no he shouldnt it adds to his charm
AETHEReal:
okay simp
bad bitch:
hunty im literally homosexual
dying™️:
but arent u bi so like u can like both boys and girls
bad bitch:
well yes
but being bi means i love all women and like 0 to 1 men becuz men are so bland
popsicle stick:
okay ouch
Fucking Fushoji:
no no shes got a point
AETHEReal:
whos side are u on??
Fucking Fushoji:
I only reside with god
AETHEReal:
hoe-
[wannabe idol is online]
wannabe idol:
arent you guys in class
why are you texting shouldnt you be listening to class?
Im a 5 star michelin:
no need school is overrated anyways
popsicle stick:
okay have fun living in the fucking streets when you get older then
Im a 5 star michelin:
it wont be fun when youre around living in the streets with me
if im failing so are you sweetie
popsicle stick:
not when I have xingqiu Im not
Fucking Fushoji:
Wow okay I feel used
Im a 5 star michelin:
besides I can start my own restaurant business in the streets
all the greats start off small after all
popsicle stick:
maybe u can find ratatouille in the streets to help you with that lol
Im a 5 star michelin:
AT LEAST A LITERAL RAT IS A BETTER COOK THAN YOU
popsicle stick:
wdym i can cook well???
Im a 5 star michelin:
sis all u had to do was fry some chicken nuggets
AND U EVEN MANAGED TO FUCK THAT UP
popsicle stick:
WELL EXCUSE ME IT WASNT MY FAULT THAT TONGS WERE HARD TO USE
Im a 5 star michelin:
DUDE ITS LIKE USING LITERAL CHOPSTICKS ONLY BIGGER HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW
popsicle stick:
shut up at least it adds flavor
Im a 5 star michelin:
more like extra crunchiness with a side of bitterness and a very unsettling taste in your mouth
Fucking Fushoji:
WAIT SO THAT BLACK DISGUSTING CRUNCHY THING YOU FED ME WERE BURNT CHICKEN NUGGETS?
popsicle stick:
umm yeah what else do u think it was
Fucking Fushoji:
IDK VERY BAD AND CRUNCHY BARBECUE I GUESS
I thought something was wrong with it, I literally didnt want to eat it then. It looked inedible
Im a 5 star michelin:
WHY DID YOU EAT IF YOU KNEW IT WAS INEDIBLE
ur an idiot
Fucking Fushoji:
I didnt want to break Chongyuns feelings so I ate it alright!
popsicle stick:
and here i thought u genuinely liked it :(
Fucking Fushoji:
I never knew that chicken nuggets could taste so unsettling till that very moment
Remind me to never eat anything made by Chongyun ever again
Id rather eat Xianglings weird slime soup than Chongyuns burnt nuggets
Im a 5 star michelin:
HEY TAKE THAT BACK!!
SMH THIS PPL DONT KNOW A SINGLE THING ABIUT FINE CUISINE
popsicle stick:
stop complaining at least you won >:(
i cant believe my own bestie betrayed me
Fucking Fushoji:
Chongyun dear Im sorry but youre a literal idiot
popsicle stick:
only for you i will be ;)
haha im so heartbroken byee
[popsicle stick is offline]
flaming homosexual:
THERES SOME WHORES IN THIS HOUSE
bad bitch:
umm eww
this is literally the third time i gagged today and its only 9 am
Fucking Fushoji:
suddenly im straight
AETHEReal:
BITCH-
Fucking Fushoji:
Okay but thats so uncharacteristic of Chongyun to say
is he okay
dying™️:
now that u mentioned it he does seem off...
Fucking Fushoji:
@Im a 5 star michelin Xiangling you have Chem with Yun Yun right??
Is he alright?
Im a 5 star michelin:
hehe about that...
well u see our experiment is like super hot so the room is literally super warm
i asked our prof if chongyun can be excused becuz of his condition but noooo he said that yun could manage
and opcors the dumbass that i am believed that he could
Fucking Fushoji:
So youre saying that Chongyun is having another one of his outbursts
OH GODS IS HE OKAY
Im a 5 star michelin:
ah no
its not rlly an outburst
but he isn't himself either...
dying™️:
then whats he doing then?
Im a 5 star michelin:
okay so hes literally red like rlly
as in jueyun chilli red
probably from the warmth of the classroom and all that blushing
Fucking Fushoji:
Blushing? Why is he blushing?
Im a 5 star michelin:
OH MY GOD HE LOOKS SO LOVESICK
ITS ACTUALLY DISGUSTING
Fucking Fushoji:
What? What's happening?
Im a 5 star michelin:
HE KEEPS SAYING THAT HE LOVES YOU BRO IM-
AETHEReal:
holy shit what???
Fucking Fushoji:
WHAT?
Im a 5 star michelin:
he keeps saying how he loves you and how he wants to wrap you in a blanket and squish your little cheeks
bad bitch:
are you sure hes describing xingqiu or a freaking baby
Fucking Fushoji:
I
don't know what to do with this information
AETHEReal:
BYE XINGQIU IS LITERALLY MALFUNCTIONING
i can confirm becuz im sitting beside him
Im a 5 star michelin:
OH SHIT EAIT
dying™️:
why what happened now?
Im a 5 star michelin:
OH SHIT CHONGYUNS CRYING NOWSKWJAKJWKSK
HES LITERALLY CRYING OH MY GODS
Fucking Fushoji:
WHAT?!
WHY IS HE CRYING?
Im a 5 star michelin:
ITHINK I MADE HIM CRY FUCK
he keeps talking abiut our convo just a while ago
the living in the streets and the chicken nuggets and how you hated it and oh gods
I MADE HIM CRY BECUZ OF THE FUCKING NUGGETS
bad bitch:
idk if i should laugh or cry...
Flaming homosexual:
this is literally gold i cannot
Fucking Fushoji:
Fuck it's a good thing Chongyun wont remember this
This is so embarassing
AETHEReal:
oh dw hell remember it
i have screenshots( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
dying™️:
AETHER YOU BIG MEANIE!
Fucking Fushoji:
AETHER ISTG IF ANY OF THIS REACHES CHONGYUN ILL MAKE SURE THAT XIAO WILL KNOW ABOUT HOW YOU DROOL AT HIS ABS WHENEVER HE TAKES OFF HIS SHIRT DURING P.E
bad bitch:
wait wut the fuck?
AETHEReal:
NO DONT PLEASE
NOOOOO FUCK FUCK FUCK
MY MOUTH IS SEALED OKAY DAMN
Fucking Fushoji:
okay good :)
dying™️:
wont chongyun see this convo tho??
Fucking Fushoji:
He doesnt backread dw
AETHEReal:
and wat if he does?
Fucking Fushoji:
Then @flaming homosexual can spam the chat with memes
flaming homosexual:
hell yeah it would be my plessure
Fucking Fushoji:
Anyways @Im a 5 star michelin how's Chongyun?
Im a 5 star michelin:
HES STILL CRYINHSSGAJSHSHSJJ
HE KEEPS CRYING IVER YOU AND THE NUGGETS SOAJAKSJALA
flaming homosexual:
i can confirm that becuz im lit rally behind them
Fucking Fushoji:
Oh gods I feel so bad for Yun Yun.
Im a 5 star michelin:
OH SHIT I THINK THE TEACHER FINALLY NOTICED US
WERE SCREWED
OH GODS HES COMING OVER BYE GUYSS ILL SEE YOU AFTER DETENTION SKWJWKSHWKWHW
[Im a 5 star michelin is offline]
dying™️:
rip xiangling
AETHEReal:
press F to pay respects
F
bad bitch:
F
flaming homosexual:
F
dying™️:
F
[bark bark mf is online]
bark bark mf:
F
[bark bark mf is offline]
bad bitch:
RAZORSKSHSKSJSKAH
wannabe idol:
that should be a lesson to all of you
so get off your darn phones already and focus on class!
[wannabe idol is offline]
flaming homosexual:
yes maam will do
will spam the gc later after class so get ready for them memes hehe~
[flaming homosexual is offline]
AETHEReal:
aight bye guys dont wanna get cancelled uwu
[AETHEReal is offline]
dying™️:
uh okay wtf
anyways bye
[dying™️ is offline]
Fucking Fushoji:
Sigh I hope Chongyuns alright
Anyways bye...
[Fucking Fushoji is offline]
bad bitch:
OKAY ARE NONE OF YALL GONNA TALK ABOUT AETHER DROOLING OVER XIAOS ABS???
OKAY WOW FINE OKAY YALL SUCK
BYE HOES