Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

part I

The Earth has practically been reborn, and Dean can feel it.

The rotation of the planet feels smoother beneath his feet, and the sun's rays feel just the slightest bit warmer against his skin. The cold, vacant emptiness that had once assumed the place of humanity is gone now, replaced with the laughter of children and the chaos of everyday life.

It’s not paradise. Far from it. But it’s different. A good different.

“So you really did it?” he asks. “You fixed everything?” 

Jack, who had been looking out towards the abundance of people now swarming the streets, turns to face him. “I’ve done what I can here, without interfering too much,” he tells him. He fixes his gaze onto the two of them. He looks far older than he should. “I don’t want to repeat Chuck’s mistakes. His problem was that he was too invested in his own story. I don’t want to become like him.” 

It feels strange seeing Jack speak so maturely when Dean has only ever known him as a child. His child. And now here he is, standing before him as the most powerful being in the universe. In a strange way, Dean thinks that this is what it must feel like to watch your child grow up and go to college, only for Jack it happened far too fast. 

And you usually come back from college.

“Jack, it doesn’t have to be this way if you don’t want it to be,” Sam tells him. “Come on. Come back to the bunker with us.”

“Sam’s right,” Dean adds, although something deep down tells him that their attempts may be futile. “Come back home. We can- we can start a new life, you know? We can go back to having movie nights in the bunker- you always loved those.” 

You, me, Sam, and…

And Cas.

“I do,” Jack confesses, his face softening. “I wanna go back home with you guys so badly. I really do.” 

“Then let's go,” Dean urges. “Come on. Let us take you home. We'll set things right. We'll- we'll find Cas, we'll... we'll work it out.” 

Jack shakes his head, as if forcing the temptation out- the temptation of normalcy. To a being as powerful as him, normalcy should be considered an insult rather than a luxury. “...I’m sorry, but I can’t,” he finally says. “Chuck did so much damage. As the one who inherited his powers, it’s my responsibility to fix it.” 

Dean looks away guiltily. He's always seen different people whenever he looks at Jack. Initially he only saw Lucifer- and then once he realized that Jack wasn't a monster, he saw Cas. He still does. But now, in a way- he also sees himself. A kid who was forced to grow up way too fast, and had responsibilities that he didn't ask for shoved onto him.

He knows that he, even if unintentionally, played a role in that as well. If he can save Jack from that fate...

“Jack, no it’s not,” Sam says, using what Dean liked to call his 'negotiation voice'. He'd always been good at that- way better than Dean ever was. “You are under no obligation to do anything. You shouldn’t have to clean up Chuck’s messes. That’s not fair.” 

“...Maybe it’s not,” Jack admits with a sad smile. “But someone has to. Someone has to try to fix this. Chuck didn’t just damage this reality. Don’t you remember all the other universes he destroyed before this one?” 

“Yeah, but- can those realities even be saved?” Sam asks. “I mean- Chuck decimated those worlds.” 

“I don’t know if I can fix them,” Jack says as he looks down at his own two hands, brimming with new power. “I was lucky that I was able to bring back everyone here. But I have to try. Those people have just as much of a right to live as the people here.” 

Neither Dean nor Sam could argue with him about that. If Jack could potentially save those people- they can't stand in the way of that, no matter how much they may want to.

Despite how much it hurts him to do so, Dean bites his tongue- for the moment.

Jack then looks skyward, towards the sun and the stars. “And Heaven,” he continues, "Chuck left it to the angels, and it’s almost completely fallen apart. Angels are almost extinct.” 

Dean’s eyes go wide as he hears the word angels. 

Angels.

He’s had Cas in the back of his mind since the moment he lost him. And of course he’s been cooking up plans- because he’s not going to leave Cas there. He won’t. But everything after that kept happening so fast that Dean hasn’t had time to sit down and focus.

But Chuck is gone now.

The world is significantly safer. Not safe- but safer.

He hadn't anticipated this- anticipated Jack leaving. But if Jack really is that strong, then maybe before he leaves there's at least one more thing he could set right.

“Okay,” he says after a moment. “If you really have to go, we… we can’t stop you. But before you go, Jack- there's one thing I have to ask you." 

Jack nods. "Of course. Anything." 

"I know it's 'interfering' or whatever, but..." Dean forces himself to push his name out of his mouth, "Cas," he chokes out. "Cas. We... we need him back."

Dean had expected Jack's face to light up, for him to smile and go 'oh, sure, no problem!'. Because it shouldn't be a problem, right? It certainly wasn't for Chuck, who had no problem pulling people out from wherever they were to help him get his way.

Could Dean not- just once- get his way?

But apparently he has yet to learn from situations like these, as Jack’s expression just... falls. He even looks away- almost shamefully. 

Dean can feel Sam's eyes on him, but he keeps going- because this is, truly, his best option right now. The only option, really. “I... I tried to get Chuck to bring him back, you know?" He pauses for a second after his voice cracks ever so slightly. "I… I just can’t leave him like that. There has to be a way.”

He meets Jack's eyes, silently pleading with him. He hopes that Jack can see through him now, can see his determination. 

“...It’s not that simple, Dean,” Jack finally says after another moment of contemplative silence.

Dean suddenly comes crashing back down to Earth from the hopeful high he'd been on for all of thirty seconds. “What do you mean it’s not that simple?” he asks, becoming somewhat frantic as he suddenly feels the world spinning a whole lot faster. “You- you’re God now. You’re the most powerful thing in the universe right now- the Empty should be running from you with their tail tucked between their legs, right?” 

Jack lets out a shaky breath. He looks as though he doesn't even want to so much as explain. “The Empty exists separate from Heaven and Hell and Purgatory- the agreement was that God had no power over it."

Sam- thankfully- swoops back in to attempt to save this before Dean stops having coherent thoughts altogether. “Right, but Chuck pulled Lucifer right out of the Empty with no problems,” he reasons. “And you took his powers. So you should be able to pull Cas out, right?” 

“Pulling Lucifer out wasn’t easy. The Empty is strong." Jack frowns suddenly, his face darkening. "I remember seeing them when I was dying. They nearly destroyed Heaven.”

After growing more and more frustrated by the second, Dean snaps. “So what, are you saying you don’t want to?” he asks point blank.

He’s tired of the excuses and the bullshit- he couldn’t see why Jack would want to deny him. He's so tired of being denied by the universe- and the sting is worse after finding out that it's not really "the universe" that's been fucking him over all his life- it was an insane egomaniac with way too much power.

But that's not who God is anymore.

“That's not it- of course I want to,” Jack insists in a slightly raised voice, hurt laced in his tone. “I... I want Cas back too. I miss him more than anything.” 

“Then what are we waiting for?” Dean asks impatiently. “Look Jack, I don’t care what it takes. I’ll go into the Empty myself and pull him out if you want me to. Just please, help me save Cas. I’m begging you here.” 

Jack looks pained, like he’s reluctant, and Dean can’t understand for a second why he would hesitate. Cas was more of a father to him than even he and Sam were. 

So why?  

“...Okay,” he finally says. He plasters a smile onto his face. “It won't be easy. But we’ll try.”

Dean wanted to have Jack zap them all back to the bunker- the less time they waste the better- but one pleading look from Jack, who wanted to ride back in the impala, forced him to climb into the driver's seat and take everybody back home- including their new addition, Miracle. The kid's God now anyway- it's not like he can refuse him anymore. Yet for whatever reason, Jack still asks for permission like he in any way has to ask anymore.

"I just want to be able to spend as much time as I can with you guys before I have to leave," he'd said.

“Jack, meet Miracle,” Dean says as he catches him petting her in the rearview mirror. "Miracle, meet Jack."

“Hello Miracle!” Jack says sweetly as he lovingly strokes her ear. “I’m Jack.” 

Miracle barks excitedly and rubs her nose against Jack's hand. 

“She says she’s glad to meet me,” Jack says, grinning from ear to ear. 

“You speak dog?” Dean asks in disbelief. 

“Oh, yeah- I can sort of talk to animals now,” Jack says casually. 

Miracle barks again. 

“Miracle says she likes the name you gave her. She didn’t have a name before you found her.” 

Dean smiles warmly at that. He hasn't always been super into the idea of having a dog- but Miracle was the exception. She's a survivor- like them. “Well, tell her she’s gonna have a good home now.” 

“Oh, she can understand you- for the most part. It’s really only you that doesn’t understand her.” 

Dean suddenly feels reminded of just how human he is, how insignificant he must be to someone like Jack, who can talk to friggin’ animals. His smile falls and he shifts his focus back to the road. 

“Don’t worry,” Jack says soothingly. “Sam and Dean are great. And they’re gonna take good care of you, okay?” 

Miracle barks again before settling onto Jack’s lap for the ride.

They get back to the bunker a day or so later. Dean only stops for gas and bathroom breaks- and even those are minimal. As soon as they all come through the bunker door, Dean claps his hands together, fighting off the exhaustion he feels seeping deep into his bones, because fuck it- no more distractions, no more waiting around. This was happening. “Alright, let’s do this. We don’t have any time to waste.” 

Sam, who looks just as exhausted as he does, holds his hands up to stop him. “Dean, hold your horses a sec. We just got back and you only stopped maybe twice that whole time. I'm pretty sure you haven't slept since... since Cas. I’m tired, you’re tired- we both need a shower and some food- let's hold off on this, at least for today.”

Dean looks at him like he's grown another head. “What? No! I’m not gonna just relax while Cas is rotting in the fucking Empty, Sam. The longer we wait, the longer he’s stuck there!” 

Sam glances uncomfortably at the space between Jack and Dean and sighs. “Jack, could you give us a minute?” he asks.

Jack nods, recognizing the thick tension growing in the room. “Of course. I’ll wait for you in the kitchen.” 

And with that he’s gone- well, presumably in the kitchen. Dean hopes that he hasn’t actually vanished- he already had to chase down one God. The last thing he wants is to have to do it again.

“Dean. I need you to think about this for a second.” 

“What’s there to think about?” Dean fires back. “Jack’s got the mojo, all he’s gotta do is pop in, grab Cas, and pop out! Shit, if it’s too much trouble for him, I’ll do it myself!”

“You heard Jack, he said it’s not that easy.” 

“Okay? So it’s not that easy. When has anything ever been easy for us? I don’t care if it’s easy or not Sam, I care about getting Cas back. He died to save me. I can’t-” Dean pauses as he feels an oncoming sob tearing its way up his throat. He quickly swallows it down before it can break him. “I can’t live with that. I can’t. And I certainly wouldn’t be able to live with myself if there was an opportunity to save him that I didn’t take.” 

Sam nods understandingly. “I hear you, I really do, I wanna save Cas too-” 

Dean narrows his eyes. “Do you? Because so far, all I’ve seen is you and Jack trying to make excuses for why we should let Cas rot away in the Empty.” 

“No one is saying that!” Sam argues, losing his calm composure at the implication. “Cas is my friend too! I wanna do whatever it takes to save him, so of course we’re gonna try. But… I mean, maybe-” 

“Maybe what, Sam? There is no ‘maybe’. This is happening. I am getting Cas out of that shithole. End of story.” 

“You heard what Jack said about the Empty. All I’m saying is that maybe we should take some time to research before we go charging in there. We should have a plan before we go poking around in the Empty. And…” Sam stops himself, looking down at his shoes. 

“And what?” 

“And, I just… I just want this to work. For Cas, and… and for you.” 

Dean’s face softens, as it always does when Sam’s voice goes quiet like that. He sighs loudly in resignation. “It’s gonna work, Sam. I’m gonna make it work. You’ll see.” 

Sam still doesn't look all that convinced, but nods anyway and follows Dean down into the kitchen despite his reservations. As they head into the kitchen, both Dean and Sam’s eyes go wide when they spot Jack standing there with his hand halfway inside a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. 

“...Sorry,” he says through a mouthful before setting the box down onto the table. “I’ve always liked that one the best.” 

“...No, it’s uh… it’s fine,” Sam manages, both him and Dean flashing him their best attempts at reassuring smiles. 

“...So,” Dean says, clearing his throat. “The plan?” 

“The plan," Jack repeats. "Yes. Um. I think Sam is right,” he says. “You’re both hungry and tired. At least wait until tomorrow.” 

Dean quickly puts two and two together and isn't all that surprised to learn that Jack had been listening in. “Jack-” 

“Dean.” Sam places a hand on his shoulder. “Please. At least try. Cas would want you to.” 

He fails to see how he could eat right now anyway. Ever since he’s let the thought of Cas come to the forefront of his mind he can barely fucking function, let alone eat. But it’s two against one, and Jack is God himself now. Dean doesn’t really have much of a choice in the matter.

“...Alright,” he finally says. “But we do this first thing tomorrow morning, okay?” 

“Of course,” Jack nods. “I’ll, uh- I’ll leave you guys to-” 

“No,” both Sam and Dean say simultaneously.

Jack abruptly freezes in place, wide-eyed like a deer caught in headlights.

“Er, uh-” Dean catches himself, “just- we’d really like it if you stayed.” 

Jack visibly deflates. “...I get it. You think I won’t come back.” 

“Uh... no offense Jack, but vanishing isn’t something you’re a stranger to,” Sam says bluntly.

Dean fights off the urge to smirk in response.

“It’s not that I don’t want to stay,” Jack says as he fidgets with the hem of his shirt. “It’s just that- I don’t sleep, so I’m not sure what I’d do all night…” 

Dean shrugs. “Do what you did before. Watch cartoons. Play with your Flip or something.” 

“Switch, Dean,” Sam corrects. “It’s called a Switch.” 

“Whatever.”

Jack’s eyes light up at the mention of the Nintendo Switch that Sam had gotten him when they celebrated Christmas together with Mrs. Butters. “...I did miss that,” he admits. “Okay," he says, "we’ll talk again in the morning.” 

And before Sam or Dean can say anything else, Jack is gone.

“Maybe we should’ve just mentioned the Switch from the get-go,” Dean muses. “That got him on board pretty quick.” 

“He’s God, Dean. He could conjure up a Switch out of thin air and play if he really wanted to. He’s staying to be nice.” 

“...Oh. Well, uh- okay. Good.” He nods stiffly and makes a beeline for the fridge. “Leftover Chinese food from last night sound good to you? Or uh..." He looks it over and shrugs. "It might be two nights old, actually.” 

“...Not really.” 

“Well it’s either that, or uh…” Dean opens the freezer, “Hot Pockets. Or dinosaur chicken nuggets.” He smiles fondly as a memory comes to him. “Cas must’ve bought those for Jack.” 

Sam pulls a face. “I’ll go with the Chinese food.” 

“Thought so."

“Man, we really need to go grocery shopping again," Sam says idly.

“The groceries can wait until we save Cas,” Dean says firmly as he sticks the food into the microwave. 

“Sure,” Sam agrees. “No arguments here.” 

The microwave finally beeps after a few seconds of silence. Dean snags a couple of beers from the fridge, grabs the food, and sits down at the table. “Bon Appetit,” he says teasingly. 

“You know, once all this is over- really over- you gotta start thinking about eating healthier,” Sam tells him as he digs into his noodles. “You’re getting older, you know? You’ve gotta pay attention to what you eat now.” 

Dean dramatically drops his fork. “You did not just give me the old man talk,” he says lowly. “I’ll have you know that I’m perfectly healthy for a man my age.” 

“You haven’t been to a doctor’s appointment since you were..." Sam pauses to think it over, "what, maybe ten? And that was only because Bobby got fed up with dad never doing normal stuff for us.” 

Dean stiffens at the mention of John. “...Well, you haven't been to a doctor either,” he grumbles after a few seconds of silence.

“...It's been a while," Sam says hesitantly, "but I went to my check ups regularly while I was at Stanford.” 

“Congratulations. You want a medal?” 

Sam rolls his eyes. “I’m not saying you have to go to a doctor Dean- but you probably should.” 

“The healthcare system is fucked up anyway, I’m not giving them my hard-earned cash.” 

“You mean the cash you earned from credit card scams and hustling pool?” 

“It’s getting harder and harder to pull credit card scams these days,” Dean notes. “As much as I hate to say it- one of these days we might have to think about, you know…” He pauses, looking around the room as if to make sure they were alone, before leaning in to whisper “real jobs.”

Sam blinks owlishly before bursting into loud laughter. “Why’d you say it like it was some kind of government secret?” 

“Because it’s fucking terrifying, man! I don’t do 9 to 5, okay? The closest I ever got to a normal job was when I was with Lisa, and let me tell you that was a fucking nightmare.” 

Sam leans back and folds his arms over his chest, clearly amused. “So what, you’re too good to work like everyone else?” he asks, smirking.

“What? No, that’s not what I’m saying! It’s just that I’ve been a little out of the game when it comes to the whole job thing, you know? I mean at least you’ve got a little bit of college under your belt. I dropped out in high school.” 

“Right, right.” Sam waves him off. “You know believe it or not, we’re actually better off than most people- at least financially. Most people have to pay mortgage or rent, a car payment, student loan debt…” 

“Hey, whatever happened to your student loan debt?” Dean asks curiously. “Stanford definitely wasn’t cheap and I know dad sure as hell wasn’t paying for it.” 

Sam shrugs. “Well, after I was pronounced legally dead, I didn’t really have to worry about it anymore.” 

Dean had sort of forgotten about that little detail. “...Oh yeah. Huh. It’s weird to live in a world where everyone thinks you’re dead and only a few people know you’re alive, isn’t it?” 

Sam shrugs. “Feels the same to me. I mean it’s not like we were celebrities, most people didn’t know we were alive in the first place.” 

“Jeez, aren’t you a ray of sunshine,” Dean mumbles as he takes another bite. “That’s kinda fucked up, isn’t it? I mean- we’ve saved this world how many times?” 

“Yeah- and nine times out of ten we were also the ones who endangered it in the first place. Most of the time we were just trying to fix the mess we made.”

Dean knows he’s got a point, but- come on. They still saved the world, didn’t they? 

They eat in silence for a few moments, with Dean making an occasional comment about how Chinese food isn’t nearly as good once it's reheated, before Sam clears his throat, and by the look on his face Dean can tell that he’s about to launch into one of his Feelings Speeches- the very topic he'd been trying to avoid.

“Dean-” 

“Sam, don't-” 

“I know you're avoiding it."

"Don't-"

"I want you to tell me what happened with Cas.” 

“Sam-” 

“I'm sorry for randomly bringing it up, it's just- I know you’re not telling me the whole story here,” Sam presses. “I get that you want to save him, but something tells me there’s just... more to this whole thing.” 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Dean says firmly as he takes another stab at his food. “Can’t we just leave it at that?” 

Sam drums his fingers against the table. “If you really don’t want to talk about it, I can’t force you. But Cas was my friend too. Don’t you think I have a right to know everything that happened?” 

“Of course you do, it’s just…” Dean stops and takes a long swig of beer. He figures that at this point there's no getting out of it. “I… whenever I think about it I just… I just wanna fucking scream, man. I wanna drive way far away from here to a place where no one will find me- not even you- and just scream.” 

Sam's face lights up with recognition. “...I know the feeling,” he says quietly. “I felt the same way when I lost Eileen.” 

“Eileen,” Dean says through a breath. “Fuck, man, I didn’t even- have you talked to her?” 

“Uh... not yet. I was gonna call her once we got Cas back and all that- but I’m sure she’s okay. Jack would’ve told me if she wasn’t.” 

“Dude. Please call her. She’s good for you,” Dean reassures him. “She gets it. And I know I've said before that marriage has never really worked well for either of us, but honestly? I’m gonna be pretty disappointed if you don’t end up marrying her.” 

Sam’s face flushes the way it always has when he thinks about a girl he likes. It's a habit that he's never really outgrown. “We’re not talking about me right now, Dean.”

“Well, can we start doing that?” 

“No. Now please tell me what happened,” he stubbornly insists.

Dean sighs in resignation and pushes his food away- suddenly not all that hungry anymore. The memories come flooding back like a tidal wave crashing over his brain. And for just a second, he almost feels like he's drowning in it- in memories of that night. “...I already told you most of it. Cas summoned the Empty and it took him and Billie. End of story.” 

“That’s not it, though. Because you said you were trapped, right? There’s no way you had the materials to summon the Empty in there. So how did Cas do it?”

“He made a deal, okay?!” Dean exclaims, raising his voice far louder than he had intended. 

“I… what?” Sam questions, brows raised in surprise. “He… what do you mean he made a deal?” 

“I meant exactly what I said Sam, he made a deal,” Dean snaps. “Look- when Jack was dying, the Empty was gonna take him, and Cas offered to go in Jack’s place. The Empty agreed, but they didn’t wanna come for him yet. So they waited. And then while we were trapped, Cas remembered the deal… and he did what he had to do to summon them. To save me from Billie.” 

Dean watches as Sam's mouth parts, processing his words. He wishes he could carry that burden for him- the loss of a best friend. He's always tried, as hard as he can- to carry Sam's pain as his own. But he's learned over the years that that's just not feasible anymore. Sam has to carry the weight of his own agony- and Dean has to let him, no matter how much it breaks him.

“I can't believe he..." he murmurs as he holds back tears of his own. "Why didn’t he tell us? We could’ve saved him! Maybe... if we had known-” 

“Cas didn’t want us to worry,” Dean interrupts. “He didn’t… didn’t think he’d ever have to pay up on his end.” 

“What do you mean? Dean, what did he do to get the Empty there? Why didn’t it take him back then?” 

Dean feels it in the back of his throat, then on the tip of his tongue, ready to spill out. But his lips just can’t form the words no matter how hard they try, and he swallows everything back down again, tears swimming in his eyes now. “Don’t make me say it,” he begs. “Please don’t Sammy, I’m begging you here.” 

He meets his brother’s eyes with his own teary gaze, and Sam immediately softens. 

“...Okay,” he says. “I’ll back off. I’m sorry I pushed you. I just… I wanted to know everything that happened.” 

“I know,” Dean replies, "and someday I’ll tell you everything. But just… just not right now, okay?” 

Sam nods. He lets it go in a way that Dean never could. 

Dean wipes at his eyes and sniffles casually, like he wasn't nearly crying. “Besides, no use crying over it. Tomorrow we’re gonna get Cas back, and everything’s gonna be the way it should be.” He stands up and slips his empty plate into the sink. “I’m gonna hit the shower before you try to trap me in another therapy session.” 

“Whatever, dude. Don’t use all the hot water.” 

Dean rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say.”

It’s no surprise to Castiel that he ends up awakening shortly after his arrival. 

He has a history of not staying asleep whenever he ends up here, much to the Shadow’s annoyance. A part of him wishes that this time he had been lucky enough to stay asleep this time.

However, he does notice that this place seems far more… lively than it did during his last visit. No wonder the Shadow can't sleep.

They aren't pleased. They’ve hardly been around since Castiel ended up here- and it’s no secret that they enjoy tormenting him given that they have a bit of a grudge. But so far all he’s seen of the Shadow is them pacing around angrily, grumbling to themself about how loud it is and that everyone needs to just go back to sleep. They haven’t paid much mind to him, and Castiel hopes to keep it that way. 

While it’s certainly not as grating to him as it must be to the Shadow, he does notice that this place seems… different. The silence isn’t quite so heavy. He supposes that that is due to Jack- something that the Shadow will no doubt blame him for. It's still the same in many ways- the same black, all-consuming nothingness that many would describe to be worse than the raging, fiery pits of Hell. Because at least there's something there- to some, torturing and being tortured sounds like a luxury in comparison to the frigid isolation of an unforgiving void. 

The screams of the awakened in the Empty sound far too much like the screams of the damned in Hell. 

Since his arrival he’s seen a few familiar faces, none of which were happy to see him. For a while he was with Billie, who certainly wasn’t any happier to be stuck with his company than he was with hers, but then the Shadow appeared shortly after and dragged her off, and Castiel hasn’t seen her since. 

He spends most of his time wandering, because no matter what- he will not go back to sleep. He meant what he said before, and although he may have come willingly, he still intends to drag the Shadow down with him, downward into spiraling madness, no matter how much the Shadow torments him.

That being said- he never gets anywhere, and he never falls back asleep. It's like going in circles.

And yet despite it all- despite the loneliness and the occasional torment from the Shadow, despite the unending darkness- he would do it all again in a heartbeat for Dean Winchester. 

He’s made his choice, and he doesn’t regret it. 

His proudest, final moment has earned him his spot here- and he's made his peace with that. This was his fate anyway, eventually. Paradise is not promised to angels the same way it's promised to humanity. Angels are warriors of God- not his children. As much as Castiel hates to admit it- he can now sort of understand Lucifer's dislike for Chuck. Perhaps he saw what he was long ago, which was why he rebelled. 

Angels don't get happily ever after as a reward for good behavior. There is only this waiting for them should their infinite lifespan come to an abrupt close. Darkness. A regretful, restless, unending slumber. This was always to be Castiel's end, yet the thought hadn't ever even occurred to him. As a soldier, the image of angelic perfection- the idea of death seemed so preposterous, because there was no other creature strong enough to stand up to them. Demons of varying strengths would come and go, but in the end they were never a match for the might of Heaven. 

And then again as a rebel- a fallen angel, choosing humanity- choosing Dean Winchester- over everything. The thought still didn't occur to him then either- one thing remaining the same after becoming something else entirely. No longer an angel, but never entirely human. But the way Dean Winchester's joyous laughter filled the air, the light of his soul shining through his eyes- being allowed to witness that was more than enough to make the thought of death inconsequential to Castiel. 

He used to think of Dean Winchester's overflowing empathy as a poison. He knows better now. It's the greatest gift Dean has ever given him. It's that very gift that gave him the strength to do this.

So no, he doesn't regret it- but sometimes, he allows himself to fantasize. About what it would be like if things had gone differently. If he had never made the deal- never had to. If after they were victorious against Chuck, if the world was truly safe, he had somehow found the courage to tell Dean how he felt- and by some miracle Dean felt the same. 

They’re just that, though- fantasies. He's confident for more reasons than one that that was never in the cards for him. Still, it brings him comfort to think about what could have been. And in here, that's all he can do. Comfort himself, because no one else will.

“Still moping around, Clarence?” 

For a split second, Castiel registers the Shadow as Meg. But he knows all too well who it really is.

“...I could ask you the same question,” Castiel retorts, turning around to face them. They’re still appearing to him as Meg, sitting regally on a throne made for them.

The Shadow rolls their eyes. “Please, Castiel- don’t get cute with me. You’re in no position to have an attitude.” 

“I guess not,” he agrees. “What are you doing here, then? Surely you have more important things to do than torture me, I mean…” He gestures all around them, “I’m sure you’ve heard all the noise.” 

The Shadow’s face contorts into dark fury. They sit upright in their throne, uncrossing their legs. “It’s that kid’s fault. He woke everyone up!” 

“But you can’t have Jack and you know it,” Castiel counters. “So that’s why you took Billie. You took out your frustrations on her.” 

The Shadow huffs and settles back into their chair. “...Torturing her got old fast. She doesn’t have the same kind of attachments that you and the others have. No bad memories, nothing she regrets- other than failing to kill Dean Winchester.” 

Castiel flinches slightly at the mention of his name.

The Shadow notices, however- and grins knowingly. “You know, I never knew or cared about what your true happiness was- all I cared about was ripping you away from it the moment you found it. But that- that was unexpected, I gotta say. A real plot twist!”

Castiel doesn’t say anything- best not to give them more to work with, after all. He supposes that there's nothing he can hide from them. His head is an open book in here, and the Shadow can reach in and start reading whenever they want. 

“And ultimately it ended up being a two-for-one for me- I managed to get you and Billie at the same time! Must’ve been my lucky day.” 

Castiel eyes them warily, then smirks knowingly. “Yes, well- it seems your luck has run out. Pardon me for saying so, but this place is in shambles.” 

The Shadow raises their fist and Castiel feels searing pain ripping through his body in waves, from his head all the way down to his feet. He falls to his hands and knees, fingers clawing at the blackness underneath him, screaming out in agony as the Shadow takes clear pleasure in his suffering. In the very core of his being he can feel their iron grip, refusing to release.

“I may not be able to have the kid, but I’ve got the next best thing: his father.” The Shadow twists their fist and Castiel cries out loudly. “You hear me? I’m not giving you up for anything. You’re mine. If you had hope that the Winchesters were gonna bust you out, then think again.” 

But then, suddenly, the pain stops. Castiel’s chest heaves with deep breaths as he tries to keep himself from collapsing onto his stomach. 

“Oh- you do, don’t you?” the Shadow taunts. “I mean, you sacrificed yourself knowing more than likely that that was the end for you, but ever since you got here you’ve had hope that maybe Dean cares enough about you to try and save you?”

Castiel can’t deny it. The thought of Dean marching in here and boldly declaring that he was going to save him has crossed his mind more than once. He doesn’t ever let himself fully believe that it’ll happen- but a part of him desperately wishes it would, mostly so he could see Dean again in some form. Having him in memories and illusions is better than not having him at all. He had kept that part of himself deeply concealed in the hopes that the Shadow wouldn't use it against him- but it seems that it's far too late for that.

He lifts his head up in time to catch the Shadow shifting, their appearance morphing into someone he knows all too well. Long blonde hair morphs into short dark hair. Brown eyes meld into green.

Standing above him now is no longer Meg, but Dean Winchester.

“You think I wanna save you? After all the crap you put me and Sam through?” the Shadow taunts, using a near perfect imitation of Dean’s voice. It's damn near spot on- but not quite. There's something off. It lacks warmth. “No. You can rot in here, for all I care.” 

“Dean would never say that to me,” Castiel argues weakly. He's trembling, barely keeping himself on his knees, but he finds it within himself to look at the Shadow right in the eye, full of defiance.

“Really?” the Shadow questions, clearly dedicated to their performance. “I never forgave you for any of that. You got Mom killed, you let Jack lose his soul, you’re the reason Rowena had to sacrifice herself. You are the reason everything went to shit, Cas. You think that telling me how you feel is gonna change what happened?” 

The Shadow grabs Castiel by the tie and lifts him in the air, wearing a cruel smile that isn’t Dean’s. “You think I could ever love you?"  

Castiel had told himself a long time ago that he had accepted that Dean would never feel the same way, and was content with whatever Dean could give him. Despite this, hearing those words come from someone who looks and sounds like Dean doesn’t help those feelings stay buried. He keeps himself focused on the sharp bitterness of the Shadow's voice to remind him that it's not Dean, it will never be Dean.

“I’m happy you did it,” the Shadow continues. “I’m glad you made that deal. Because now Sam and I don’t have to put up with your sorry ass anymore. We can finally get on with our lives without you dragging us down.” 

“That’s… that’s not true-” 

“Oh, you know it is.” The Shadow suddenly drops him. He manages to land on his feet, but before he can orient himself they’re pulling him close. “This what you wanted?” they taunt as a hand comes up to cradle his cheek. “In all that time, how many times did you think about having this?” 

Using all the strength he can muster, Castiel shoves the Shadow away from him and stumbles backwards, putting as much space between them as he possibly can. “That’s enough.” 

The Shadow smirks before grotesquely shifting back into Meg. Castiel watches as the last remnants of Dean leave their form. “That was fun. I’m gonna have to try more of that sometime.” 

Suddenly a loud, echoing wail- one that even Castiel can clearly hear- pierces the dark, unoccupied space between them.

The Shadow clicks their tongue in annoyance. “...Looks like I’ve gotta run. But don't worry, I’ll be seeing you again real soon, tree-topper. Don't go anywhere.” 

Before he can say anything more the Shadow vanishes, leaving him to himself.

Dean doesn’t sleep- although he's not sure if it's due to his own stubbornness or his body's refusal to do so. He wishes he could just shut down, shut it all out.

It’s no surprise, really- he’s no stranger to sleepless nights, after all. No matter how much he tries to drift off to sleep his mind wanders right back to where it's been for days.

He remembers every second. Every detail of that night. The slight chill of the room. The dim lighting and the way it hit Cas' eyes. He remembers his face- the tears streaming down his cheeks, the last bright, true smile he ever gave him before the Empty came. Dean feels fucked up for even thinking it- but in his last moments, Cas had looked so completely content- and if Dean hadn't been so stunned, if his brain hadn't been going a million miles a minute, he might have realized it then. That happiness looks so beautiful on Cas, and he'd give anything to see that kind of happiness on him again- but this time, with no strings attached. Just the two of them.

Dean hasn't slept since Cas- and he's glad for it. If he had a dream, he knows that it would've featured Cas.

If I could go back and say it back to you, Cas...

After a few hours of restless tossing and turning, he finally decides to give it up and just wait for the sun to rise. This wouldn’t be the first all-nighter he’s pulled and honestly, how can he be expected to sleep right now? After everything? 

“Hello!” 

Dean nearly jumps out of his own skin, dropping his phone onto the bed. “Jesus! What the fuck?! You scared the shit out of me!” 

“Sorry! It’s just me, promise. Not Jesus.” Jack looks around his pillow curiously. “Um… no gun this time?” 

Dean follows the path of his gaze to his pillow. Yeah, like it would work on you. “You caught me off-guard," he says instead as he sits up in bed. “What’s wrong? You have a nightmare or something?” 

“No, I could just sense that you were restless,” Jack says. “And I was worried. I just wanted to be sure that you were okay.” 

Great. Now he’s gone and worried God himself. “Yeah, I’m alright,” he lies. He lies knowing all too well that Jack can sense it. 

“...I know you’re worried about Cas,” Jack says as he nervously shuffles around Dean's bed. “I’m worried about him too.” 

“I know you are,” Dean says softly. “Listen, Jack- I know you care about Cas, alright? I know you care about us, it’s just… you’ve got all this responsibility on your shoulders now and… you just… you don’t deserve that. You’re still a kid, you know? You should’ve had more time to just… be a kid without the end of the world hanging over your head. That wasn’t fair to you.” 

Jack smiles, and it reminds Dean of Cas- the way his eyes crinkle and his mouth lifts. “I know it’s hard to understand,” he says. “Sometimes I don’t even understand it. But I don’t have to. I just have to believe. I just have to be myself. You, Sam, Cas, and my mother- you all taught me that. It’s thanks to all of you that I had the strength to do this.”

Dean feels the stinging ache of those words stirring deep in his chest. He's never bought into that- the whole 'you don't have to understand- just believe' schtick. It always seemed like some shit that Bible-thumpers spread around to manipulate people into becoming believers or whatever. Oh, if only they knew what the God they'd been praying to before was really like.

“I… I know you said you felt like you had to do all of this. To make up for what happened. But Jack, I… I want you to know that I never wanted this. I know I made it sound like I was happy I was sacrificing you but that’s not true. I never wanted this for you. Chuck got into my head and made me say shit that never should’ve come out of my mouth.” 

“Dean, it’s okay, really-” 

Dean ignores him, continuing on. He pulls the words straight from the ache within him, like sucking the poison out of a wound. “Still, the blame doesn’t just fall on him, because I really did feel that angry, but deep down I knew it wasn’t fair to you. I’m sorry that I let myself spiral when I should’ve done better at taking care of you.” 

“Dean-” 

He can’t stop now- the words keep pouring out uncontrollably like the tears in his eyes. He's not sure where all of this is coming from but he doesn't doubt for a second that it's true. “And I’m sorry that I said you weren’t family- it was just… the only way I could convince myself to let you go, was to be angry at you- angry at Chuck, angry at Cas, angry at everyone. That wasn't right. I never should have taken it out on you or anyone else. But I was ready to forgive you, Jack. I was. I still am. It’s going to take time, but I… I wanted to do that. Hell- more than anything I wanted you to forgive me. And now… now with you leaving, I don’t know if we’ll ever-” 

Dean is abruptly silenced when Jack gently pats him on the head. The crying, the rambling- everything just stops, and Dean is filled with a feeling that he can't put into words. It's far too great, way beyond his understanding. It slowly pours through his veins and sinks into every square inch of his body, settling him and preventing him from trembling further.

Maybe it's just God mojo in the end, but whatever it is, Dean doesn't question it. 

Perhaps this is what Jack meant by not understanding, but believing. 

“It’s alright, Dean,” Jack says simply, smiling reassuringly while he pats Dean’s head. “You didn’t push me into this, if that’s what you think. This was my own choice. I’m happy I made it. I got to save the world. I got to save you. And now I’m going to save Cas. So it’s okay.” 

Jack drops his hand then, and the words that had been building up in the dam of Dean’s mind, the dam constantly on the verge of breaking, disappear on his tongue. He just feels… calm. He’s not sure if it’s Jack’s powers or what, but he smiles right back at him. He feels more relieved now than he has in a while. 

"And I already forgave you," he adds. "A while ago. I was never mad at you, really. All I wanted was for you to forgive me." 

Then, in that moment, Dean does something he never does. 

He makes a promise. 

"I will," he says. "I'll forgive you, Jack." 

Jack nods, but his smile suddenly falls. “I… I wanted to apologize too. About Cas.” 

Puzzled, Dean’s brows knit together in confusion. “What about Cas?” 

“His deal with the Empty- he made it to save me,” Jack tells him. “Cas asked me to keep it a secret, and I did, when I should have told you guys anyway. If I had… maybe Cas would never have gone to the Empty in the first place.” 

“Hey, it’s okay,” Dean says. He doesn't get angry- partly because he already knew- but mostly because he understands. He understands now, more than ever. “Don’t blame yourself- Cas wouldn’t want that. He made that deal because he cares about you, and he’d do it again in heartbeat. You didn’t want to go against what he wanted, I get it.” 

Dean can think of a time when he might have been angry at Jack for that, but not anymore. Since Cas, he’s come to realize that he can’t keep falling into that pattern- all it ever does is hurt him and hurt the people around him. It's a cruel, brutal cycle that hasn't gotten him or the people he loves anywhere. It's only caused more agony all around. 

He just wants it all to stop. And maybe, if this goes right- maybe one day it will.

“I’m gonna miss you guys a lot when I’m gone,” Jack says idly as he looks around Dean's room. “I’m gonna miss being here with you guys. This place is my home.” 

He's been preparing himself for Jack's eventual departure- but hearing it still stings deep. “So you’re… you’re still gonna leave,” he says quietly. He's not sure why he was expecting anything else.

Jack smiles sadly. It’s terribly bittersweet. “I didn’t want to tell you this because it’s kind of embarrassing, but the reason I didn’t want to go back with you at first was because… I thought that the longer I spent with you… the harder it would be for me to let go. I thought that I had to leave then while I still could. But then I realized that you were right- that even after everything, I couldn’t just leave Cas like that. Not when he raised me to be who I am.”

“What, God?” Dean remarks, smirking. 

“No,” Jack says. “A Winchester.” 

Dean can’t help but smile at that. 

“Here.” Jack places two fingers against his forehead. “Go to sleep. You’ll need your rest for tomorrow.” 

“Wait,” Dean holds up a hand, “you promise you won’t let me sleep in, right?” 

Jack considers it for a moment before he nods. “I promise.” 

And with that, Dean is out like a light, darkness filling his vision and keeping him suspended in slumber.

He wakes up the next morning feeling considerably well-rested, despite his aching joints and the seemingly never-disappearing headache. He sits up and stretches- and Miracle comes bounding towards him, excitedly licking his face and whining. 

“Hey girl, you seem really excited today, huh?” Dean greets as he hugs her tight to his chest. He reaches for his phone to check the time, and gasps when he sees ‘11:27 A.M.’ in bold numbers on his screen. 

He curses, stumbles out of bed, gets dressed as quickly as possible, and lets Miracle out, knowing that she probably desperately needed to use the bathroom and was waiting for Dean to wake up and let her out. 

He comes running into the kitchen a few minutes later after letting Miracle back inside, and his eyes go wide when he spots Sam and Jack sitting at the table, Sam holding a coffee mug and Jack holding a mug of tea. Miracle comes walking in shortly after, heading over to greet Sam and Jack.

“Hello!” Jack greets him warmly. “Sleep well?” 

“Yeah, a little too well! What the hell, why did no one wake me up?!” 

“Because you needed the rest,” Sam says calmly. “You feel better, don’t you?” 

“I- uh,” Dean sputters, knowing fully well that he can’t deny it. “I- whatever. It doesn’t matter.” 

“Dean-” 

“We’re not putting this shit off any longer, Sam.” Dean sits down across from Jack and next to Sam. He doesn't even bother to pour himself a cup of coffee- which had always been part of his morning routine. “Let’s get this show on the road. How do we do this?” 

“It’s going to be… tricky,” Jack admits. “The Shadow has a grudge against Cas. It’s going to be hard to get them to give him up.” 

“Why would the Empty care about keeping Cas there?” Sam asks. “Why would they care so much about Cas but just let someone like Lucifer walk right out?” 

“The Shadow doesn’t like Cas very much. For waking up and refusing to go back to sleep the first time he was there. And then Cas made a deal with them…” Jack pauses, his face falling, “...to save me.” 

Dean ignores the misty-eyed look Sam gives him.

Jack then visibly perks up. “But it’s not impossible. The last time I was there, I remember what they said before Billie pulled me back out- they said I made it loud.” 

“What do they mean ‘loud’?” Sam questions curiously.

“Everyone sleeps in the Empty,” Jack says, “but after the bomb went off, I think I woke some people up. And the Shadow wasn’t happy about that. If those people are awake, the Shadow can’t go back to sleep- and that’s what they want the most.” 

“So what- can you make everyone there go back to sleep?” Dean asks. 

“No,” Jack answers. “I don’t have that kind of power over the Empty- not even Chuck did. Everyone will have to go back to sleep on their own. But I think that can be our distraction.” 

Sam looks up from his mug, intrigued. “You’ve got a plan? Already?” 

“Something like that,” Jack answers hesitantly. “Remember how before I could open portals to other worlds? And when Cas came back from the Empty the first time- I was the one who woke him up. I think now with Chuck’s power I can open a portal straight to the Empty.”

“Okay, so what- you’re just gonna pop in there and pull him out?” 

“No,” Jack says flatly. “He might be asleep. If he is, I’ll have to wake him up first. Then once he's awake, I can see where he is in the Empty and go right to him.” 

“Good call,” Dean says idly. “What about the Shadow or whatever?” 

There's no denying that Jack looks worried- but in all honesty, Dean can't exactly tell him he shouldn't be. There's not a whole lot of lore on the Empty- and certainly nothing in the bunker on how to kill them. If Jack hadn't been willing to step up to the plate, Dean's not sure what they would've done.

“...I’ll handle them," Jack says, attempting his best brave face. "I know they won’t let Cas go willingly, but I don’t want to have to fight them. I have a backup plan in case they show up.” 

Dean looks over at Sam, and he can tell just by reading his face what he's going to say next.

“We’ll come with you,” Sam offers. “As backup. Or- you can just stay here. Keep the portal open while we go in and find Cas.” 

“That’s impossible,” Jack says, shaking his head. “The Empty is an infinite void of nothing. Humans can’t navigate it. I have to be the one to go find him. No offense, but you two just aren't strong enough to take on the Shadow by yourselves- and I'm pretty sure they won't just let Cas slip out." 

Oh. Of course. 

Thing is, Dean's getting a little tired of being told to just sit there and look pretty while all the fights go down. He wants- desperately, more than anything- to be a part of this- a part of saving Cas. “So we just have to sit here with our thumbs up our asses?” he asks, frustrated. 

“Dean.” Jack stands up and walks around the table to place a hand on his shoulder. “It’s my fault that Cas is even in this mess in the first place. I owe it to him to do this- and I can’t imagine how he’d feel if something ended up happening to you. How I would feel."

“Your fault? Jack, we’ve been over this. If it’s anyone’s fault it’s mine, I mean I’m the one he-” he pauses, swallowing back the words yet again. He tries to force them out and they don't budge.

He still can't fucking say it. 

“...I know,” Jack says quietly. “It’s okay, you don’t have to say it. I understand. You feel responsible. I feel responsible too. But I need you to trust me on this. Trust that I can save him. Can you do that?” 

Dean glances over at Sam, who nods once in affirmation. At this point, Jack is their only option. Their only hope. And if he says he has to hang back, then he'll play along if it means Cas comes back safe. “...Alright,” he reluctantly agrees. “I trust you.” 

Jack nods and takes a step back. “Thank you.” He draws in a deep breath to focus himself. “This may take a while.” 

He closes his eyes, and the energy in the room becomes charged, shifting and swirling around them, through them. Dean can feel the hairs on the back of his neck stand- similar to when he's in the presence of a ghost, but not quite the same.

When Jack's eyes open again, they're a bright, burning gold. And Dean realizes then that this wasn't just a transfer of Chuck's power- Jack has taken that power and made it his own. He's not just Chuck's replacement. He's a new being entirely. 

He's hope. Belief. Merciful. Kind. Everything a god should be.

“I feel him,” he says after another few moments, “I can feel Cas. He’s already awake.”

After what felt like eons of aimless wandering, Castiel finally stops to attempt something akin to rest when the Shadow appears again- this time as Dean. Castiel notes that they're wearing the outfit he last saw Dean in- the jacket, including the bloody handprint he'd left on his shoulder.

“What do you want with me now?” he asks, sounding far more annoyed with them than frightened or intimidated.  

“You mean you haven't noticed? It seems like maybe my luck hasn’t run out yet.”

Intrigued, Castiel fixes his gaze on them. “What are you talking about?” 

The Shadow taps their nose. "Someone’s poking their nose in here- and my guess is that whoever it is, is with Sam and Dean. They're never not involved in things like this, so I don't have any reason to suspect anyone else.” 

Despite not needing to breathe, Castiel feels himself go breathless.

No. It has to be a trick. This is just the Shadow playing games- it has to be. If he lets himself believe... even for a second...

“Sam and Dean… they’re looking for me?”

The Shadow shrugs and lazily puts their hands in their jacket pockets. If they're lying, they're dragging it out- and they're playing the part well. “Not sure. Can’t tell yet- that’s just my guess. But I gotta admit- I’m surprised anyone cares enough about you to bother. Why not just let your legacy live on as a bittersweet memory? They just can't seem to let go, can they? Talk about serious attachment issues. Most people just mourn their loved ones in peace and let them go. They don't throw the world into an apocalypse just to save someone they lost. You boys need some serious therapy if you think that's the solution."  

“Don’t you dare lay a finger on them,” Castiel warns, fully prepared to defend them even without the power of Heaven behind him. “Don’t you dare.” 

The Shadow tilts their head, grinning. The slimy smile is so unlike Dean’s that it makes Castiel sick to his stomach. This thing is using his face- Dean's face- to make such ugly expressions. “And what are you gonna do to stop me? Even if you were strong enough to do anything, I don’t think you could lay a hand on Dean Winchester.” 

For a second, Castiel recalls the time he spent in Heaven, killing copy after copy of Dean Winchester. He remembers how many times he had to do it until he got it right- until he stopped sobbing, stopped hesitating. He shakes his head and steps closer, eyes flaring blue with the last bit of Grace he has left. “You’re not Dean.” 

But the Shadow just laughs. “Don’t try the fireworks in here, Sparky. You know just as well as I do that your Grace is fading fast- it was even before you ended up here. Tell me, how long do you think you would’ve had on Earth before it fizzled out completely? Ten years, maybe? Five? The more you use it, the less time you have. The clock's ticking- oh wait, sorry, I forgot..." they pause to grin knowingly, "yours isn't anymore.”

They then turn and begin to circle around him like a lion stalking its prey. “But to be honest with you, I’m more interested in how they managed to poke around in here. Billie certainly didn’t send them here, so I wonder who did..?” 

If not Billie, the only other person with the power to access the Empty is…

Chuck?

That can’t be right. Jack had to have defeated him. If they had lost, they’d be dead. 

Jack…

“Now then, I’m gonna go see who decided to knock on my door. In the meantime, you hang out here. If the Winchesters do manage to get to you while I’m gone, they won’t be able to move you.” The Shadow snaps their fingers and Castiel falls to the ground on his back. Thick, black tendrils slither over his wrists and ankles, binding him to the ground and keeping him firmly in place. He writhes in their grip, his eyes flaring blue as he attempts to use his Grace to bust out of his restraints- but to no avail.

The Shadow's smirk grows as they watch him struggle. “Nice try, but like I said- whatever remains of your Grace is no more than a light show in here, Cas.” They turn around and walk off into the darkness. “See you around.” 

Almost as quickly as they had appeared, they’re gone again, leaving him trapped.

“Cas? It’s Dean! Can you hear me?” 

Castiel’s eyes shoot open. He knows that voice- and the Shadow had just left to go investigate, after all... right? 

The passage of time blurs together in here. It could've been minutes, hours, days, weeks that he'd been left here. Castiel had stopped counting the moment he arrived. There was no point, after all- or so he'd thought. 

It could just be the Shadow playing games. He had to be careful.

“...Dean?” he asks tentatively. “Is that really you?" 

“Yes! It’s me!” he exclaims. “I’m gonna get you out of there, okay?" 

"I'm here too!" a voice that Castiel immediately recognizes as Jack adds. "We're all here. Sam, Dean... and me. We're gonna save you!"

Was he dreaming? Had he somehow- in this pit of madness- fallen asleep again, even though he swore he wouldn't? "I... this... this has to be-"

Dean's voice cuts in again. "Cas, it's us, I swear it is! You've gotta believe me, okay? I know that the Empty... I'm sure they've been fucking with you since you got there. But I swear Cas, it's me. I'm real. I remember everything you said to me that night and I... I can't just let you go after that. I need you to come back to me, okay?"

His voice breaks ever so slightly, and that's when Castiel comes to the realization that he wasn't wrong to believe. 

It's warm. The voice is warm. 

"Dean," he murmurs, desperate and perhaps a tad too optimistic, "Dean, I believe you." 

"Good. It's me. We're here Cas, and we're not going anywhere. We're gonna get you out." 

If Sam and Dean were with Jack, that could only mean one thing: that they had won. They saved the world. 

"There we go!" Jack says victoriously. "Found you! Don't move, I'll be there in a second!"

“I, um…” Castiel glances down at his bound wrists and ankles. “I don’t think that’ll be a problem.” 

“Good! Sit tight, I’m on my way!” 

“No wait, Jack! Listen to me! The Shadow knows you’re here, they’ll be looking for you! You need to be careful-” 

“Hello!” 

Startled, Castiel manages to glance up and spot a smiling Jack standing before him, holding up his hand.

“Jack,” he says through a breath of relief. It floods him with joy to see a familiar face that doesn't want to kill him. “You came… that means-” 

“I’ll explain everything once we get back.” He squints in confusion when he notices his restraints. “Oh. You can’t move.” 

“The Shadow is… reluctant to let me go,” Castiel says. “After all the trouble I’ve caused.”

“If you’ve caused so much trouble, they should have no problem letting you go so they can sleep,” Jack insists. He squats down and places two fingertips to the thick, sludgy black bindings around his ankle. After a moment, they finally snap along with the rest of them, and Castiel immediately sits up, accepting Jack’s offered hand. Jack pulls him to his feet- and then into a tight embrace.

"I've missed you," Jack murmurs into his shoulder. "I missed you so much."

It's the first contact he's had in what feels like centuries, so Castiel melts into it, holding onto Jack a bit longer before reluctantly releasing him. “Jack… are Sam and Dean really...” 

“They’re back on Earth,” Jack says quickly. "But we don’t have a lot of time. There’s only one surefire way to get you out of here- you’ll just have to trust me.” 

“Of course.” Castiel nods. “What did you have in mind?”

"He's taking too long." 

"Dean. He just left. Like five minutes ago." 

"So? Jack should've been back by now," Dean argues as he anxiously paces back and forth across the kitchen. "He must have run into the Empty before he could get out." 

"You really didn't think he'd be able to just walk in and out with no trouble, did you?" 

"Not helping, Sam."

"Okay. Sorry." Sam sighs and runs his hand through his hair. "But Jack did say that he had a plan. You should trust him." 

"I do trust him," Dean insists- because he does trust Jack, and he believes in him. He has no reason not to. More than anything- he wishes he could say he's always believed in him the way Cas and Sam have, and it's one of his biggest regrets. "It's the Empty I don't trust. What if they're stronger than Jack, what if they-" 

"Dean," Sam says sternly. "You need to relax. You're letting your nerves get the best of you."

Dean freezes and meets his eyes- and reluctantly stops to take a few breaths to calm himself down. "Sam is right," he tells himself. Panicking isn't going to help anyone in this situation- it definitely isn't going to help Cas. Yet the longer he waits, the more he wishes he had just gone in himself. It doesn't seem fair that Jack has to do all the work- because really, how are they helping by sitting here twiddling their thumbs?

"The best thing we can do for right now is wait for Jack," Sam tells him. "You've gotta give the kid a little more credit, Dean. He's pretty powerful now." 

"He's had his God powers for like two days, Sam. Not even that." 

"He's been preparing for this. He's ready." Sam stands up and claps a hand against his shoulder. "It's gonna work. I know this is difficult for you, but for once- have a little faith." 

Faith. Dean has a complicated relationship with it. 

But if it's for Cas, he thinks that perhaps this once he can make an exception.

“Alright,” Jack says, his eyes flashing gold. “Let’s get back before-” 

“Before what?” 

Both Jack and Castiel turn around and- to neither of their surprise- the Shadow is standing behind them, now wearing Meg’s face once again. 

“You think you can just pop in here without me noticing?” The Shadow stalks closer, face devoid of any teasing snark they might have had before. “You think you can just walk in here and take him from me? Castiel and I had a deal. He’s mine!”

“All Castiel has ever done is cause you trouble,” Jack calmly reasons. “Just let it go. Things will eventually settle here. You’ll be able to go back to sleep- which is what you want, right?” 

“No,” the Shadow argues, frantically shaking their head. “No. Castiel is responsible for starting all of this. He needs to suffer. He needs to pay the price.” 

“He’s suffered enough,” Jack says definitively. 

“You don’t get to decide that!” the Shadow shouts. Their eyes then widen as if reaching a realization- and they sigh and quickly reel themselves back in before they can unravel further. “Listen kid- I know you’re new to the whole God thing, but even you should know. The deal is that God doesn’t mess with my people, and I don’t mess with his.” 

“Castiel is one of my people,” Jack insists. “He’s my family.” 

“That wasn’t part of the deal!” 

“It is now.” 

Castiel feels the space beneath their feet start to quake as the Shadow seethes with rage. “You don’t get to just waltz upstairs, declare yourself the new God, and make new rules! This is how it's been for centuries!” The Shadow raises their fist, snickering. “I mean, come on- do you really think you’re strong enough to stop me?” 

“I don’t know if I am,” Jack answers honestly. “But I don’t have to be.” He fishes around in his pocket and retrieves a vial holding a bright, swirling blue substance that the Shadow immediately recognizes. 

“Castiel’s Grace!" they exclaim, “But-” 

“The rules of the original arrangement between us- your people and my people. Now that Castiel is human, he has no reason to be here. He’s no longer one of your people. He’s mine.” 

“NO!” the Shadow roars. "We had a deal! He has to uphold his end! Human or not, he stays!”

Black tendrils shoot up from the ground, intending to curl around Castiel again, but Jack freezes them right where they stand. He glares threateningly at the Shadow. “Let us leave. I don’t wanna fight you. I think you know what will happen if we fight.” 

The Shadow meets his gaze- tempting, considering. They want to- Castiel can sense it and he knows that Jack can as well. They could do battle here without affecting Earth- it’s the Empty after all. 

But that doesn’t mean there won’t be side effects. A battle of that size- a battle that would be catastrophic on Earth- here with Jack would not only awaken everyone in the Empty- but it would keep them all awake for at least quite a few centuries. 

And the Shadow, of course, knows that better than anyone.

Their resolve crumbles as they finally break, collapsing into a series of chuckles. “You know what? Fine,” they choke out through unhinged laughs, “fine! Go! I don’t have the energy anymore. A battle with you could take eons. Take Castiel. He’s not worth the damage that a battle with you would cause.” 

“Thank you,” Jack says graciously. “I mean it. Thank you.” 

The Shadow waves them off. “Get out, before I change my mind.” 

And with that, they disappear into the darkness. 

Jack smiles pleasantly, clearly pleased with the outcome. “I think that went well!” 

“...Thank you,” Castiel says. “I never would’ve been able to convince them to let me go.” 

Jack nods. “Of course.” He points his hand out into the space in front of them. A golden crack of light splits through the consuming darkness, and when the crack opens and morphs into a round portal, Castiel can see the familiar sight of the bunker’s kitchen on the other side, waiting to welcome him.

It’s almost surreal. A part of him wonders if he’s dreaming. He certainly wouldn't be surprised.

But if this is a dream- this is one that he'll gladly stay asleep for.

“Are you ready to go home?”

Castiel looks over to him and nods. “...Yes. I’m ready.” 

He steps out of the darkness again, and he's home.