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Jongseong turns off their bedroom light and gets ready to call it a day.
Heeseung is already on the bed, and his eyes are waiting for Jongseong's to come over with anticipation. Jongseong immediately smiles when he catches a glimpse of the elder's doe eyes and wonders if they are as blinding as the stars tonight.
He allows the elder to wrap both of them with the blanket: the winter air tonight is rather chilling. Heeseung scoots closer to Jongseong; his body is yearning for the younger's warmth and comfort. Once he rests his head on Jongseong's muscular chest, he says, "I had a rough day today,"
Jongseong knows. From the way the elder behaved the whole day, Jongseong is aware that something is bothering Heeseung.
"Tell me about it, hyung." Jongseong whispers, his voice mimics the gushing wind that is blowing the leafless trees outside their dorm.
He hears the elder is sucking a deep breath, almost excruciating, and Jongseong pats the other's head lovingly. Heeseung can be so hard on himself, and Jongseong does not like that. Heeseung is the most hardworking and down-to-earth human being Jongseong has ever met. It pains him to know that Heeseung feels insecure with himself, even though in Jongseong's eyes, all he can see is utter perfection radiating from the latter's existence.
Heeseung links their fingers together and locking them afterwards. He places their interlaced fingers on his heaving chest, "I strained my voice again. The recording did not go as I have expected,"
"I was there," Jongseong intervenes, "and you sounded amazing, hyung."
The elder heaves a small chuckle, but his honey-like voice is lacing with hurt. "Thanks, Jongseong, I appreciate it. But even the vocal director said I messed up, big time ."
"He was exaggerating, hyung," Jongseong replies. "You were not that bad, I swear."
It is dark, but Jongseong can somehow see the elder's dimming features. Heeseung is no longer smiling, and Jongseong's heart cracks a little.
"Yeah," Heeseung creaks a reply, "I was not perfect either,"
The thing about Lee Heeseung is: he is the ace of their group, a multi-talented idol, has a warm personality, loveable and friendly, diligent and responsible, understanding and kind. Heeseung is an epitome of perfection, at least for Jongseong, he is. From the first time they met four years ago, Heeseung has always been perfect in Jongseong's eyes.
But what is perfection? How do people define perfect? It varies from one person to another. And knowing Heeseung, he strives to fit everybody's interpretation of flawless. He works hard, to the point of breaking his body into pieces. Although Jongseong will pick up every shattered piece of Heeseung, he does not want to do that just yet. He does not want to allow that day to come.
"Heeseung-hyung," Jongseong calls, and he feels the other is shifting to look at him. His doe eyes are glimmering, and Jongseong is starstruck. Words are not coming, and thoughts are not processing in his mind as Heeseung stares at him with shiny eyes and a cute pout.
He swallows the lump in his throat and caresses the elder's cheeks with his free hand. "You do not have to be perfect, hyung. That is what makes you perfect; your imperfections perfected you." He says, and he hopes Heeseung will feel the sincerity in every word he had spoken.
"We are humans, after all, hyung. We are bound to make mistakes. Mistakes help us grow, and it nurtures us to be better. We do not have to be perfect, but we can be the better version of ourselves, for the sake of us and not others."
Jongseong learns a lot from his fellow ENHYPEN members: they have gone through different challenges, and Jongseong takes them as a life-lesson. He has a fair share of obstacles, but he strives to be optimistic and continue what he does best. He continues to believe in himself, and he hopes that Heeseung will do the same.
His fingers are tracing the elder's cheeks and down to the latter's plump lips, and stops. Jongseong cracks a brighter smile this time, "I want you to know that even when you are falling, there are six people that will catch you no matter what. You can trust us," He stops, diverting his focus solely on Heeseung's teary eyes, "You can trust me. I am always here for you, hyung."
He does not expect Heeseung to engulf him in a tight hug, but it is a pleasant surprise. Jongseong allows the laughter to erupt, bubbles of happiness are exploding as the elder hits his chest lightly in embarrassment. Jongseong is glad that Heeseung is not shy to express his vulnerable and child-like self to him. Being the eldest, he feels the responsibility to be capable of the younger members. Jongseong is happy that Heeseung is willing to open up to him than the other members. It makes him feel special, and Jongseong enjoys feeling that.
But, when Heeseung wraps his legs around Jongseong's torso and snuggles deeper into his neck, his skin is tingling. He feels electrocuted by the intimacy, by the hotness of Heeseung's smooth skin on his cold ones, and it sends a wave of pleasure to wash away all his worries. He reciprocates and hugs the elder with the same amount of force, just enough to make Heeseung laughs again.
"I love you," Heeseung whispers. Jongseong hears all of them: the shyness, the confidence, and the homeyness of Heeseung's beautiful voice. "You are the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, Jongseong-ah."
What is perfection? Jongseong's answer is this moment . With Heeseung in his arms and the blanket wrapping both of them; this is perfection.
Jongseong pulls away and pinches Heeseung's nose playfully. It turns red in an instant, and Jongseong receives a smack on his head. "It hurts!" Heeseung huffs in discomfort, and Jongseong takes this as a chance to tease the elder even more. He inches closer and plants a delicate kiss on Heeseung's reddening nose.
"I love you too," He replies. Heeseung is on fire, and Jongseong enjoys looking at the crimson on his cheeks, and the million-dollar smile lacing his red lips. Beautiful .
Jongseong pats the crown of Heeseung's head and pulls the elder to his chest again, where the other truly belongs. "Okay, hyung. It was a rough day for you. Let's sleep and forget about today."
Heeseung nods in agreement. Both of them lies down on the bed; limbs are tangling under the blanket, and hearts are happily thrumming in their chests.
"You did a great job today, Heeseung-hyung," Jongseong says as the night deepens and the world quietens.
He feels warm fingers are drawing multiple patterns on his chest, leaving burning patches all over his skin that makes his heart race.
With a breathy breath, Heeseung whispers, "Thank you for believing in me, Jongseong-ah,"
A kiss lands on his cheeks as Heeseung hugs his body tight, "You did a great job today, too."
It is quiet, but Jongseong enjoys listening to Heeseung's mellow heartbeat contrasting with his rapid ones. He takes refuge in the way Heeseung clings onto him. He smiles as the smell of their shampoo calms the heart-hitting rush in his body.
Tomorrow is a new day for everyone, and he hopes that only good things will happen to Heeseung. Only good things.