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Jack watched as his boyfriend polished off the last piece of cake, he got for their one-year anniversary.
“Good?” teased Jack as his boyfriend began licked his spoon clean before moving onto the plates and other utensils.
Watts froze and slowly put down the knife before nodding
“You were correct on him being the best baker in town.”
“I’m glad you liked it.” Stated Jack as he began to move the dirty dishes to the sink
“I’m sorry I ruined the surprise.”
Jack sighed turning around to face Watts before frowning at how worried the man looked.
“Llewellyn.” Offered Jack walking over and running his hands through the man’s hair before cupping his face so he would look at him, “I’m not mad at you.”
“But your—”
“So, what if you found out a day earlier than I would have liked, you still clearly were surprised.” Offered Jack
Watts let out a sigh of relief at this and brought one of his hand’s up to touch one of Jack’s,
“But I do think we need to talk about what you thought I was doing with Andrew.”
Watts’s eyes instantly shot Jack a panicked look as he tensed up
“Again, I’m not mad at you. I just want to know what was going on in that head of yours?”
Watts nodded but gripped Jack’s hand tightly as the other man sat down across from him.
“I thought you and him were…I thought you were…and he was…”
“You thought I was cheating on you?”
“I’m sorry I-“
“Shh it’s okay, I can see where you got that from. I know you saw us having lunch together and I’m assuming about town as well?” asked Jack which received a nod from his boyfriend, “So as I said I can’t blame you for thinking that way. But, at the same time I’m concerned about your lack of trust in me—”
“Jack I’m sorr—”
“Please stop apologizing I just want to know what happened to make you so guarded and how I can help?”
Watts stared at Jack for a moment before nodding. He hadn’t told Jack much about his childhood, the few details he did give were small, enough where it answered Jack’s questions but not enough where it opened old wounds.
“I told you that I was adopted when I was younger.”
“You did.”
“That is not a 100% true, I was never legally theirs, they just took me in.”
“Were they not good to you?”
“No they were wonderful, they treated me like they did their sons.” Offered Watts before getting a haunted look on his face
“Llewellyn?”
Watts looked at Jack to find him looking very concerned as he gripped his hand tightly
“You don’t need to—”
“No, you deserve to know.”
“Okay but if you want to stop at anytime—”
“I will let you know,” He offered before taking a few deep breaths to steady himself as he gripped Jack’s hand, “My parents were immigrants, Jewish to be exact. They passed away before my twelfth birthday, I have a few memories of them but they are blurry. The only truly clear memory I have of them is my mother singing a Yiddish lullaby.”
“Are those happy memories for you?”
“I…I’m not sure what type of memories they are. They do not make me feel joy but at the same time I do not feel saddened by them. They are just there scattered amongst the other memories I have that I have no feelings about.”
“Alright, so you lost your parents at a young age and had no other family to care for you?”
“Yes and no. I had family but she didn’t care for me, and still doesn’t.”
“Whoever that is, isn’t very bright in my eyes.”
“I do not believe my older sister Clarissa would even give you the time of day little alone care for your feelings.”
“Why do you say that?”
“She abandoned me when I was twelve. She said she was going to work and left. I always thought something bad happened to her. Her disappearance is one of the reasons I joined the police force. I wanted to find her and make sure no one had to go through what I went through.”
“Did you find her?”
“Yes, during a case. I was looking into a group of missing women, and found them all at a house. The house’s original owner died and left everything to my sister who decided to open a sanctuary for women. No men allowed. When I found her, I felt relief to know she was safe but I needed to know why she left me. I wish I listened to her lies that she didn’t know where to start looking for me or that she was running from a man. But, after finding out she was lying I told her to tell me the truth and do you know what she said to me?” asked Watts looking at Jack with tears in his eyes
“What?”
“She said she left me because she did not wish to be chained into a life of servitude. She left me because she did not want me.”
“Oh Llewellyn,” Whispered Jack wiping a stray tear from Watts’s face “I know it hurts because she was your sister, the one who was supposed to care for you, but again she is clearly not bright if she considers you a burden because you are clearly not that.”
“How am I not?”
“If it wasn’t for you the world would be a much darker place and I’m not just saying that because I’m your boyfriend because I’m positive that your friends, fellow officers, and even the people you’ve helped see it too,” Stated Jack “Also going by what you told me about your adopted family they clearly didn’t see you as one either, you were their son.”
Watts offered Jack a small smile which earned one back, only for Jack to frown quickly when he noticed the haunted look return to Watts’s face.
“What?”
“My adoptive family had two sons, twins, I considered them my brothers in every way. I protected them like my sister should have protected me.”
“Why did they need protection?”
“They were different and the world was cruel to people like them especially a boy on our street. I tried to tell this boy’s father whenever he hurt my brothers but he wouldn’t listen. Eventually his lack of listening caught up with him. The boy slaughtered my brothers…tortured them…and the boy’s father shot his son dead which resulted in him hanging.”
“Jesus Llewellyn...”
“Now you see why I have trouble with trust…everyone I ever trusted either dies or stabs me in the back…I was so worried when I saw you with him and—”
“Shh shh come here.” Stated Jack pulling Watts’s into a tight embrace, “Now listen to me, I will always watch out for you. I will never intentionally hurt you in anyway okay?”
“Okay.”
“And if you are ever, ever, concerned about our relationship in anyway, come to me I will do just as I am doing now. Hold you and tell you that you do not have to worry because I love you with all my heart Llewellyn Watts.”
“I love you too.”
Jack smiled at Watts before giving him a gentle kiss before wiping Watts’s tear-stained face clean.
“Now that you know that your stuck with me,” stated Jack earning a soft laugh from Watts “What do you say we go to bed? Because I would love to be able to hold you properly.”
“I would like that very much.”
Jack smiled up at him giving him one more kiss before leading him to the bedroom where both of them stripped down before climbing into bed and curling up together.
“I love you.” Whispered Jack sleepily
“I love you too.” Whispered Watts before they both drifted off into a peaceful sleep.