Chapter Text
Iruka had a big stick of dango in his hand, chubby little fingers coated in sauce wiggled in the general direction of one paper lantern as he jumped in glee. He had never been so happy. His father secretly fed him food after food as his mother pretended not to notice. People smiled at him, they were singing in joy and the village was so alive.
So many colours, so many lights. So much food.
It was only his first festival and he was eager to see and touch as many things as possible, escaping from his father every time he could and running around, giggling all the way, dancing in between peoples legs. Then he would squirm and laugh when his mother caught him, without much difficulty, she would hold him tightly against her chest and kiss him until he was breathless.
His tiny hands would wrap around her neck and he would give her one single kiss in her forehead, her smile brighter than every lanter that decorated the streets.
“Come Ruka,” His father said, taking him and tossing him in the air, and making him land on his shoulders, “Let’s go see the fireworks”.
He screamed in joy, tossing his arms in the air and smiling at his mom.
Never had the village seem a boy so lively, so full of love. People looked and instantly smiled at the scene, waving to the little one as he eagerly waved back. The family followed a dimly lit path, small Iruka now in his mother's arms. His blue Yukata contrasting with her pink one, both decorated with waves and little dolphins, his choice. She couldn’t say no.
His father, that for his chagrin had chosen a simple dark blue Yukata with no dolphins, led the way as they went up, getting farther away from the village and its people. The forest had little lights here and there, the animals ran to hide as they approached. Iruka let out a big yawn, hiding his face in his mother's neck and looking at her with big sleepy eyes.
“No sleeping now, love, I have someone I want you to meet,” She said as she pinched his cheek, he grumply lifted his head, trying to stay awake.
They walked some more minutes until Iruka could hear voices, it took him a while to recognize them and, when he did, he turned quickly in Kohari’s arms, a big smile grew in his face as the sleepiness went instantly away.
“Nato-Sam,” he screamed, squirming in his mother's arms until she finally let him go, he ran into the hokage’s arms without any ceremony, for him the man was simply a friend, not the all powerful fourth.
“There he is,” Minato squatted and opened his arms, taking the boy as he all but jumped him, “How’s my little ninja going?”
“So full of sugar that I’m sure I’m not getting any sleep tonight,” Kohari answered for him, nudging Ikkaku accusingly.
“Hello Ruka-Kun, look at you. So dashing in your Yukata,” Kushina approached them, taking Iruka in her arms as soon as he gave his arms for her, “Here, we want you to meet someone”
She turned around and Iruka’s eyes showed his confusion as he didn’t see anyone there, then he looked down and saw crazy grey hair. He gigled.
Funny hair.
“Kakashi, this is Iruka. Iruka, this is my student, Kakashi” Minato was beside Kakashi in a second, holding the boy by his shoulders and smiling brightly, as if he was afraid the boy would run if he wasn’t there, “I want you to be friends”
“He is a baby,” Kakashi stated, offended, “You want me to be friends with a baby. Why?”
“I’m not a baby,” Iruka instantly replied, his lips forming a little pout before he had the brilliant idea of showing his tongue. Yes, that’ll teach him.
“Minato-Sensei, please let me go home,” Kakashi voice was hopeless, as was he, he had no idea why his Sensei wanted him to “be a kid and interact with some people, have some fun” .
“You can go home after we see the fireworks, here, take Iruka with you,” Kushina set the little kid loose and Kakashi looked at her disapprovingly, he didn’t like babies, they were too...vulnerable.
“Ruka, why don’t you show Kakashi-kun how good you are at climbing trees?” His father encouraged, Iruka's face lit up and he looked at his mother expectantly.
“No climbing,” She gave his father a stern look, then she took a small bundle from her purse and offered it to him, “But you can sit at that big tree and share your cookies with him”.
Iruka had never taken something so fast as he took that precious package, he then looked full of uncertainty at Kakashi, the boy with funny hair, he looked like he wanted to run away.
The toddler inclined his head a bit to the side, studying the other boy with curiosity. He wore a mask, not a funny one as the others from the festival, a black one. His clothing looked like his father’s work uniform. Was this boy a ninja? Nice.
Kakashi inclined his head back, like a curious puppy. Iruka made his decision, grabing at the other boy's hand and pulling him, asking no permission and accepting no negatives.
They would be friends.
Kakashi wanted to scream in despair.
~***~
“Do I really have to go?” Kakashi asked while studying every scape route there was. Of course he had none, Minato wasn’t the Hokage because of his looks.
“We did promise Kohari-Sama, didn’t we?” Minato said as if he had doubt, “We don’t want to go back on our word now, huh?”
Kakashi didn’t complain after that, honour was something very important to him and of course he wouldn't go back. He also knew Kushina-Sama was helping with the cooking and she would be so mad if he didn’t show up.
Iruka’s house looked like a civilian house. Weren’t his parents ninjas? Looking at the facade he could bet they had a big backyard and a swing. How peculiar. When they arrived something flew past him, Minato had a armfull of Iruka in no time.
Kakashi frowned, resting a hand in his stomach, it was hot and funny. Like it was dancing around his abdomen, it went away when Minato put the boy in the ground. Kakashi chose to ignore it, but got a bit close to his Sensei.
“Kashi-Kun,” The boy had no respect for rank, seriously. And he was older too, “My mom says I have to show you my room” and then he grabbed his hand, it was the second time he might add.
Kakashi looked behind, begging for his Sensei help, then up, praying for divine intervenience when Minato betrayed him.
Iruka’s room was...well, it was different. The boy had toys everywhere, drawings glued to the walls and, was that a teddy bear? So many colors, no place to hide, no traps. So many blankets.
“I don’t want to see your room,” Kakashi finally pulled his hand away, he didn’t want to be there. It made him feel warm, unlike his own room.
His room was a ninja worthy room, and that was the right type of room to anyone that wanted to serve Konoha. A bed, dark walls, one blanket.
“Too late, you saw it,” Iruka giggled and Kakashi stared at him, how undignifying to be outsmarted by some kid.
“Well, but I didn’t want to,” he mumbled, turning away to find the adults, eat, and go promptly home.
“Do you wanna play ninja?” Kakashi froze, turning back to the child with a serious look on his face.
“You can’t play ninja,” He said with a chilling voice, Iruka’s eyes grew big and he draw back, the beginning of a pout in his lips, he was going to cry, Kakashi panicked, “ Please don’t cry, ” he begged with a small voice, they would hate him if he made a baby cry, “ I’ll play ninja with you, please don’t cry ”.
When Kushina finally went to the room to retrieve them for dinner a happy Iruka whore Kakashi’s hitaiate, a smile of pure joy in his face. Kakashi looked miserable.
Kakashi found out some interesting things that night, at the dinner table, he liked eggplant a lot. He also didn’t mind a little boy mimicking his every move.
~***~
Kakashi’s hands were dirty. No matter how much he cleaned it. He could still see the blood.
“Kakashi,” Minato’s voice brought him back to the moment. He had spaced out. He was so tired.
“Yes, Sensei?” They had crossed the gates, they were safe in Konoha. Kakashi relaxed a bit, but still hid his hands in his pockets. He didn’t want people to see how dirty they were.
“Lets go to Iruka’s house, he must miss you.”
“No, I want to go home and rest. Sensei, please don’t make me.”
“I heard Kohari’s was finally convinced to let him have his little garden, he must be eager to show you.”
Kakashi knew that, no matter what he used as an excuse, Minato wouldn’t change his mind. Would it work if he said that he didn’t want little Iruka to see the monster he was?
He followed his Sensei, a twisting sensation on his stomach, he wanted to run in the opposite direction. From the distance he could already see Iruka, waiting expectantly at the white wood gate that decorated the entrance to his house. The boy smiled brightly, running fast in their direction.
Kakashi stepped to the said, waiting to see the small boy jump to his Sensei arms. It was a surprise when his legs were hugged and he was tackled to the ground. He lifted his hands instantly, ready to defend himself from the threat. Warmith filled his chest as a small body shook, giggles filling his ears.
His arms circled around Iruka tentatively, hugging the boy as he got up.
Minato was right, Iruka did want to show him his garden. And, as Kakashi helped to dig holes for the seeds, he found his hands busy and covered in mud. The blood was just a distant memory.
~***~
Iruka was fast, he had to be. His friend was a genius and experienced ninja. Either he was fast or he was caught.
“Gotcha,” Kakashi landed on the branch at his side, a hand in his shoulder. Iruka smiled.
“Only because I’m tired”
“Yeah, sure” Kakashi laughed, Iruka was 5 now, soon he would have to stop using this excuse, “Gotta be faster if you want to become a ninja someday”.
“I’ll, you’ll see. I’ll be stronger than you,” Iruka answered, defiant.
“Please do,” Kakashi was suddenly serious, Iruka looked at him confused, he smiled at the boy and started to run, “I’m tired of winning” he shot back.
“You’ll see,” he could hear Iruka’s laugh as he ran after him.
~***~
Kakashi was nine now. Iruka was a six years old boy, happy and full of warmth. He had a loving family, friends, and a whole lot of things that Kakashi didn’t deserve. He was a soldier, built to kill and protect in battle. Not to play ninja with babies, nor plant eggplants. Playing tag in the woods wasn’t something a ninja should do.
Maybe if Kakashi had closed himself better, Obito wouldn’t be dead now. He wouldn’t have lost the closest thing he had to a brother. Maybe if he hadn’t accepted the love Iruka brought with him, the family dinners with the family he didn’t belong to, the picnics he loved so much. Maybe if he had been a better soldier, he wouldn’t have Obito’s eye.
He couldn’t have Iruka, he couldn’t have friends. Minato would have to understand that. Because he couldn’t bear to lose Iruka like he lost his dad. Like he lost Obito.
~***~
Iruka was seven when he saw Kakashi again, it was by chance. He was sitting on a tree, drawing, when he heard someone training. He approached carefully, looking at the boy in the clearing. He would recognise that hair anywhere.
“Kashi,” he all but screamed, the boy startled, looked straight at him and made to run. Iruka jumped quickly to his feet, ready to follow him, he didn’t have a lot of chakra control yet.
It was a nasty fall.
Iruka was face first in a rock, he could feel blood gushing down his face, he couldn’t breath.
Strong arms wrapped around him and he felt the floor disappearing beneath his feet. He blacked out before he heard Kakashi’s panicked screams at the middle of the hospital. When he woke up his mother was beside him, he had bandages all around his face, a new scar on his nose. His best friend nowhere to be found.
~***~
Kakashi was eleven when he lost the last people he dared to be close to. Minato was gone, Kushina was gone. The last time he had seen Iruka the boy had a face full of blood because of him. Kakashi was a danger to foe and friends alike.
Iruka too had lost all that was precious to him. All alone in the world and lost he cried for someone to just hug him already. But there wasn't anyone. His parents were gone, the fourth and Kushina were gone. Even his house was destroyed. His best friend had left him, he didn't know why. Iruka missed him.