Chapter Text
Dori was not an easy-tempered dwarf,
everyone knew it, and
everyone behaved accordingly.
From an early age, Dori had distinguished himself from other dwarf kids
by
being a rather grumpy and very whiny type. He had to complain about
everything,
everything spoiled his mood, everything could become a source of
grumblin.
Soon it was realized that Dori had been blessed by Mahal with a beauty
almost
out of the ordinary, but he was only a lantern for fireflies: as soon
as some
dwarf approached interested, Dori chased him away in a bad way without
much
ceremony.
His bad temper was aggravated when he
had to deal with
little Ori. In addition to his general discontent about everything, a
sort of
inner mother hen was born and permanently installed that would not
allow him to
leave Ori alone for even a second.
In short, Dori had a bad temper and hardly anyone who was not his
younger
brother could stand him.
So it surprised no one, not even Dori
himself, when the
company began to vehemently avoid him after the first few days of
travel.
No one behaved unpleasantly or purposely avoided him, but Dori found
himself
more frequently than others riding alone or in companies that spoke to
him only
a few words. Moreover, during the dinners few dwarves would gladly sit
next to
him to eat and chat happily.
No one was looking for him for what was commonly called good social
interaction.
Dori wasn't surprised, in fact he
would have been quite the
opposite, and snuggled into his marginal position in the company. He
never
stopped grumbling and complaining about anything to anyone, observing
with a
small sense of satisfaction how others responded condescending and a
little
uncomfortable.
He was like that and he wouldn't change his way for any reason in the
world.
This behavior often led him to
quarrel with his other
younger brother, Nori. He was a free spirit, always very cheerful and
flirtatious and crafty ways. Dori couldn't stand that lewd attitude of
him, but
Nori managed to win the sympathies of many people in that way.
At that moment, Nori was certainly attracting the attention of Bofur, a
kind
and friendly miner who loved to chat and take care of the little hobbit.
Nori had certainly noticed him already from the first evening in Bag
End, in
the hobbit's house, and since then he has tried in every way to attract
his
attention, with obvious success.
The only company Dori really wanted
and demanded was Ori's.
The little dwarf had to be his shadow, he couldn't get away from him,
he had to
remain under his constantly worried and inquiring gaze.
Ori was her younger brother, whose innocence had to be protected in
every way,
and Dori was furious when he saw that Ori was beginning to take some
interest
in Dwalin and prefer the warrior's company to his.
Dori could not accept it and accentuated his discomfort by venting him
into
constant complaints about everything.
That day, Dori could not stand the
heavy rain that was
soaking his exquisite travel clothes and expertly braided hair. He had
tried to
ask the wizard to do something, but he was a little laughed at and his
request
was cordially refused. However, this did not seem to calm the dwarf, on
the
contrary it increased his discontent and his grumbling.
Soon most of the dwarves that were around him distanced him tired of
hearing
his constant complaining, and Dori found himself a bit isolated from
the rest
of the group. The only ones still around him were Balin, who was busy
chatting
thickly with Thorin, Ori, and Bombur.
"Oh I can't take it anymore, this rain will drive me crazy!"
Silence.
“It has been raining for hours, it is not possible that the sky is so swollen with rain! Someone cursed this quest!"
Silence.
"Damn, I'm so drenched that my panties are wet too!"
Giggle.
Dori jerked his head up to see who
was laughing at his
words. Balin was covering his mouth with a gloved hand and watching him
with an
amused look as Thorin snorted. Dori blushed violently under that gaze.
He had
talked a lot to say something and vent his bad mood of him and he had
not
realized that he had said something that could be obscene and
misunderstanding
at the same time.
He swelled with wounded pride and glared at the old dwarf who was still
giggling.
“Well, what are you laughing at? Aren't you wet too?"
He tried to maintain a pose that
screamed pride everywhere as
he spurred the horse away, the sound of muffled laughter following
behind his
back.
He felt deeply humiliated and suddenly he hated that old noble dwarf
who did
nothing but worship Thorin and talk about commerce and politics.
But looking back on it soon after, Dori felt vaguely flattered that for
the
first time since they left Ered Luin, someone hadn't just ignored him
but not
only listened to his words, but also had a positive reaction (he was
used to to
behaviors much less polite than that).
He rode on in the pouring rain with a small smirk on his face.
*
That evening the company was dripping
with water, but
finally camped in a dry place.
The cave they had chosen was small and welcoming, but above all
sheltered from
the wind and pouring rain that continued to fall non-stop.
Oin and Gloin had managed to recover good wood for the fire, even if it
was
wet, on the journey. Luckily, they had a small supply of dry wood with
which
they lit a modest fire that served to dry the wet one and make it
usable.
Having the fire ready, Bombur immediately set about cooking a hot and filling soup while the other dwarves tried to change their wet clothes for something clean and dry. Soon there were clothes and rags hanging everywhere to dry, Bifur had even used their weapons and a rope to create a small drying rack. A gamble, if someone or something attacked the company most of them would be disarmed, but they still decided to take the risk.
Dori was sitting on a small stone
near the fire trying to
warm his feet cramped by the cold and humidity. He didn't want to have
blisters
and other injuries that would bother him on the journey, and he had
forced Ori
to do the same too.
The other dwarves gathered in small groups and began chatting happily
as Bombur
announced dinner was ready.
They began to eat the hot soup with
taste while they
commented on the trip, remembered funny situations or talked about
home. Soon
Bilbo also brought Ori, who sat beside him, into the conversation, and
Dori
found himself in silence eating his soup while listening to the general
chatter. Sometimes Ori tried to get him into the conversation, but Dori
answered listlessly.
He was very tired and deeply bothered by the general situation.
He lacked his bed, good food, the warm comfort of a home, and the constant presence of Ori who depended totally on him. There in the company he had none of that, and he contented himself with distractedly observing how Nori whispered who knows what things to a very amused Bofur. For some strange reason that sight caused him a strong feeling of sadness and he quickly averted his eyes, shifting them to the rest of the company.
Fili and Kili ate with relish and talked aloud with Gloin gesturing with spoon in hand, splashing all the soup around. Oin listened to them smiling and nodding, but he probably couldn't hear half of the words they were saying. Dwalin was engaged in a heated conversation with Thorin, Balin following in perplexity and sometimes speaking with a few thoughtful words.
Dori stood watching him for a moment,
really looking at him
for the first time. Balin was a dwarf with a noble bearing and a very
good
taste for aesthetics, Dori had to admit, who took great care of his
physical
appearance despite his advanced age. For an elderly dwarf, Balin kept
himself
very well and was quite endearing.
Dori snorted in amusement. The thought that he would find Balin, an old
dwarf
of noble rank, endearing had surprised even himself.
Balin intervened in the discussion by
addressing Dwalin, and
as he did so he saw Dori watching him. As soon as he finished talking
to his
brother, he turned his attention to Dori and smiled at him. Dori was
amazed by
that kind gesture on the part of that dwarf whom he knew little and
with whom
he had even less interactions.
He looked away without returning the smile and assuming a contrite
expression,
but in reality he felt inside himself as if something was blooming.
And if his cheeks flushed, no one pointed it out.
*
The flood lasted for days, spoiling
the mood of the whole
company. Even the cheerful Bofur began to suffer the negative influence
of the
time, he smiled with effort and no longer sang silly songs to cheer up
his
spirits.
Dori was intractable the whole time, even with Ori, and this displeased
him
very much.
After that evening when Balin smiled at Dori, the elderly dwarf had no
longer
shown any interest in getting close to Dori, and the latter classified
the
dwarf as one of the many who ended up avoiding him after getting to
know him a
little better.
He never accepted the thought that he was a little sorry about that
turnaround,
nor did he ever accept the idea that perhaps he could take a step
towards the
dwarf. Accepting this would have meant admitting that Dori was actually
mildly
interested in Balin.
Even slightly defining that interest was a lie, but Dori had always
managed
effectively to stifle his inner little voices with force.
After those humid days came the
long-awaited spring sun that
warmed dwarves and ponies with placid heat. Everyone found a better
mood and
the silly and funny songs started again. It seemed as if the mood of
the
company varied according to the weather, as if they lived on
photosynthesis and
therefore drew energy from the sun.
Quite unusual for a group of dwarves accustomed to living under the
mountains,
but just that was happening right now.
Dori reluctantly yielded Ori to Dwalin, watching them as they rode next to each other and chatting amiably. Dori had tried to object in every way, but Ori had simply ignored him in favor of Dwalin. Now Ori was slowly leaving him behind too, Dori thought painfully, soon he would be alone with a great void to fill.
He rode with his head down thinking
about the emptiness that
Ori was causing in his soul when the space that until a few moments
before had
been occupied by his younger brother's pony was taken by another.
Dori immediately raised his head in anger, ready to chase away any
dwarf who
had approached him that way, but he froze instantly when he saw Balin's
affable
smile.
The old dwarf smiled warmly at him, then looked ahead to his brother
talking to
Ori.
"Don't you also think they're a really curious couple?" Hee asked him in a soft voice.
Still contrite and astonished, Dori followed his gaze and also looked at the strange couple riding ahead of them.
“I only see two very different people talking, and above all not a couple. No, impossible, I refuse to think about it!"
"Why do you say that?"
“Ori is too small, he can't start a courtship if Dwalin ever really wants to start one, and I doubt it. Also, I don't think Dwalin is right for Ori. Ori is such an educated and shy dwarf, Dwalin rough and belligerent. No, it's not possible"
Balin's smile changed from friendly to bitter as he watched Dwalin smile at little Ori as he excitedly told something.
"Maybe you should give him a chance, Ori is pretty big now, he's an adult dwarf-"
"No, he’s not. He's not ready, I tell you"
"And when will he be, in your opinion?"
"Never!"
Dori raised his voice in the last answer and this led Balin to fall silent and not answer. They were silent and lost in their thoughts for several minutes, Dori stabbing their brothers' shoulders with his eyes, Balin looking wistfully at the path they were walking.
"Do you think that two dwarves with a large age difference cannot make a good couple?" Balin asked suddenly, looking directly into his eyes.
Dori noticed that the other dwarf's gaze was full of pain and for a moment he wondered if they were actually still talking about their brothers, but that doubt was immediately suffocated by his usual stubbornness. Not taking pity on Balin's docile attitude, he hardened his features and looked away in anger.
"No, that's not the point"
"So the problem is their difference in social class?"
“Not even this! And if you mean that Ori is not up to your social rank, you are very wrong!"
"So, what is the problem?" Balin pressed on, noticing how bad Dori was taking all those questions and about to explode.
“Because we are talking about my little Ori, my little brother. I will not allow anyone to touch it, never, ever!"
The screams spun several members of the company, especially Ori and Dwalin who rode ahead of them. Dwalin looked at them with perplexity as Ori was flushed to the tips of his ears and looked at Dori with a hurt look. Dori was deeply ashamed of having lost his temper and screaming those words. He tried to say something to Ori, but the boy turned his back on him and urged the horse to advance faster.
Dori sighed heavily as he felt like an asshole, then he remembered why all this had happened and turned furiously to Balin who continued to ride peacefully beside him.
"Are you happy now?" He almost looked like he was spitting poison with anger, but Balin smiled sweetly. He seemed almost relieved of a great weight, all the sadness of a few moments before disappeared who knows where.
“Actually yes. And don't worry, Ori will have already forgiven you"
He slowed his horse's pace by pulling the bridle and left Dori to mull over, perplexed and amazed on what had just happened.
*
That episode radically changed Balin's behavior towards Dori, much to the latter's amazement and disappointment. After that discussion on horseback, which Dori considered devoid of any logic or utility, Balin began to be more present around Dori. It was not a sudden change, but rather a slow and gradual approach of the old dwarf to the young man of difficult character.
Balin began to look at Dori frequently or to listen to his complaints more often, also trying to respond adequately when he had the opportunity. His presence around Dori became constant, even if never inappropriate. It was a discreet presence that did not interfere with Dori in the least, and that he understood when the latter needed solitude or intimacy.
Dori tried to ignore the continued veiled attentions of the elderly dwarf by suspecting him and his purposes. Realizing that that change had taken place after their discussion on the possible union between their two younger brothers, for Dori it was now taken for granted that Balin acted like this by the will of Dwalin or in any case to favor that situation.
He has no interest in me, he just wants to help Dwalin get Ori. Ah! dreamer him, dreamer them! I will never leave my Ori, ever!
Despite his aloof and slightly hostile behavior towards him, Balin showed no sign of giving up, which made Dori nervous and curious at the same time. Usually his suitors got tired in a short time of that hopeless court, or they decided to act directly in the hope of getting out of that stalemate, instead Balin revolved around Dori like a bee revolves around a flower, but never lean on its petals. It seemed as if Balin was content to be able to stand by him and listen to everything he had to say.
The calm and patient behavior of the
king's old advisor
confused Dori not a little, who in a few days no longer knew how to
deal with
that dwarf. He would have liked to chase him away but he did not want
to be
rude in the eyes of the other members of the company, moreover he did
not want
to antagonize the dwarf nobility, but it irritated him not to be able
to know
the real reason for those concerns. But in his heart, Dori began to
feel
slightly pampered and secretly began to enjoy those little attentions,
even if
he didn't show it. So when Balin sat next to him while they ate around
the
fire, Dori felt like something hot and sticky was filling his stomach
well
before he ate his meal.
When they rode, Dori had to try hard to suppress a smirk when he
noticed how
Balin tried to restrain the horse or encourage its stride to catch up.
Often
there was no exchange of words and both Dori and Balin engaged in
conversations
with other members of the company, but when their eyes happened to
meet, Balin
always had a sweet smile just for him.
One evening they camped under a large
oak which made a good
shelter thanks to its gigantic and intricate branches.
The company was exhausted from the long ride of the day, but they
managed to
set up camp and prepare dinner and their beds. Dwalin and Balin were
sent to
gather wood and Dori found himself staring at the old dwarf walking
away,
chatting to his brother.
When he noticed it he immediately looked away, but he made the mistake
of
placing it on his younger brother. That hothead of Nori sat next to
Bofur and
put his arm around his shoulders, but his attention was completely on
Dori. He
winked complicit, evidently aware of the strange situation between
Balin and
his brother. Dori blushed violently with embarrassment and cast a
hateful look
at him, then he devoted himself to watching how Ori tried to draw the
intricate
intertwining of branches and leaves of the oak.
It was a long time before Fundin's two sons returned to the camp, so much so that some dwarves began to worry and murmur that they wanted to go find them. Dori remained oblivious to the situation, but even if he would deny it under torture, in his heart he too began to worry about the fate of the two dwarves. Not so much for that energetic Dwalin, he knew very well to take care of himself, but for Balin who, although still a formidable warrior, was still an elderly dwarf.
The sigh of relief at seeing them return was general, but despite the fact that they carried a considerable amount of wood with them, they all felt that something was wrong. Dwalin was red as a burning flame and livid with anger, his eyes threatened an explosion of violence at the slightest provocation, while Balin had lost his good-natured and calm air and seemed more the dwarf representation of despair. Both of them placed their load near the fire and without saying a word sat away, closing in on their silence.
It was evident that they had fought
heavily on some subject,
Dori recognized all the signs of a furious quarrel that had just
passed, he had
tried them all on his skin several times thanks to Nori. When he saw
that Balin
decided not to sit next to him but next to the silent and reserved
Bombur, Dori
felt a hint of disappointment mixed with the strong desire to reach him
and ask
him what had happened.
He immediately gave himself a mental slap for two reasons: it was
incredibly
rude to ask a dwarf with whom you were not very familiar with intimate
details
about his family, and because he had wanted even for a moment to be
with him.
Don't get swayed, Dori! He is kind only to help Dwalin, he just wants me to soften up so I can happily accept the relationship between Dwalin and Ori! He has no interest in you, he is like others. Don't be fooled, Dori! You must think of Ori's good, always!
But those thoughts failed to take root in his mind as he watched as Balin forced a courtesy smile at Bombur as he accepted a plate of soup, then set it aside and looked disconsolately at his feet. Balin looked like a beaten dog, and it reminded Dori a lot of when Ori was sad about Nori's sudden departures.
He started an inner conflict whether he would get up and go to Balin to talk to him or pretend nothing happened and continue eating and listening to Ori's chatter. He couldn't make up his mind, all possibilities had pros and cons. At a certain point the question lost the connotations of doubt and became more of a statistical problem, like when he analyzed the possibility of making a purchase or not. Dori analyzed all the certain and hypothetical aspects of both decisions, trying to understand which would be better to choose, both objectively and subjectively, placing the emphasis on his personal interest, then on the interest of the company, evaluating whether Ori's influence could compromise the final results.
Eventually, Dori spent so much time
mulling over that he
didn't notice that the moment had passed and all the dwarves were
laying down
while those on watch took their places.
Dwalin insisted on being first. His anger was such that it would be
useless for
him to try to sleep.
Balin, on the other hand, immediately took his leave with a forced smile and a quick goodbye, then he hid under the covers of his bed curling up on himself. Worried, Bifur and Oin placed their beds next to him and slowly dozed off. Thorin, too, was worried about that ill-concealed argument between brothers, but his common sense told him not to meddle in the private affairs of other people's families, even if they were cousins and close friends of him.
Dori was annoyed by that situation,
blaming himself for
thinking so long about something trivial instead of making a decision
right
away. He had let the opportunity slip away and probably would never
have
another one.
But, on the other hand, what did he care? It wasn't his business and he
didn't
have to poke his nose into things that didn't concern him.
But even so he couldn't help but take one last look at Balin's covered
form as
he crouched next to Ori already half asleep.
*
The next morning the company set off
again early and in a
good mood. Many of them chatted non-stop, some laughed loudly even
though
Thorin and Dwalin always kept a gloomy air and Gandalf looked around
with a
good-natured and slightly bewildered air.
Dori made sure Ori had eaten breakfast and took everything with him,
then
mounted the pony himself and walked off following the line. Balin was
galloping
far behind him and Dori hadn't been able to see him to make sure of his
mood.
Not that he cared of course, only that he was sorry that a dwarf as
kind and
peaceful as Balin was in such a sad mood.
After a short time his brother Nori joined him, followed by Bofur cheerfully humming a silly song.
"So Dori, did you sleep well tonight?" Nori asked with a sly smile on his face.
"Yes fine. What do you want, Nori?"
“Oh, so you offend me my brother! Can't I want to know how my favorite big brother is?"
“First of all, I'm your only older brother, in spite of myself, and second, you are never interested in others except for some personal gain. Now tell me what you want or let me ride in peace!"
He heard a small chuckle coming from
Bofur clumsily covering
his mouth with one hand so as not to sound too disrespectful, while he
agreed
with the rumors that Dori really had a bad temper. Dori flicked his
tongue
while Nori nudged Bofur in the side to make him stop, well aware that
Dori was
very close to getting nervous.
And a nervous Dori was a very intractable and annoying Dori.
"Okay Dori, you know me all too well" Nori yielded "I've noticed that lately you spend a lot of time with Balin son of Fundin"
“It's not me who spends time with him, he's the one who goes around me nonstop. I don't know what he wants but he won't get it, whatever it is!"
Both Nori and Bofur were impressed by Dori's acid response and his quick jump to conclusions. Dori was also surprised by the same words from him. It seemed like things if he was trying to attack and divert attention to himself to protect himself ... but to protect himself from what?
"Anyway, it's none of your business" He concluded dryly, then gave a firm blow to the pony's bridle and walked away from his brother.
Nori pursed his lips as he watched him go, doubtful and suspicious.
"It almost seems like your brother is clumsily trying to hide his sympathy for Mister Balin" Bofur commented with a sympathetic smile.
“I know him well enough to be able to say that not even he has noticed this sympathy of his, or that he is trying in every way to stifle it. Dori is like that. First the duty, then the duty, finally the duty!"
"And the pleasure?" Bofur laughed, amused by that pun.
"Pleasure for him consists in duty" Nori laughed back, then turned serious. "But not this time" He concluded with a wolfish smile.
*
The days of travel passed quietly.
After the first few where
Balin and Dwalin carefully avoided each other by not speaking but
always trying
to be courteous and polite to everyone else, Thorin eventually called
them both
aside after a dinner.
They talked for a long time, Dwalin more and more upset as Balin
maintained a
cool composure and Thorin listened without speaking. The situation did
not seem
to improve until Gandalf intervened, who with a few words managed to
placate
everyone, then quickly walked away not wanting to interfere in the
matters of
the dwarves.
The confrontation continued for a long time but in the end Thorin
seemed to
find a compromise, and the two brothers shook hands and hugged each
other
relieved to have found a solution.
From that moment on, the trip returned to being peaceful and very
smooth, full
of cheerful chatter and good humor, even if you could see an unspoken
question
on all those bearded faces:
What was the reason for the fight?
Balin went back to being the peaceful and quiet dwarf ever, his constant but not bulky presence refreshed the hearts of all, who had suffered in seeing him so tried by the situation. And soon Dori found himself again at his side talking about light topics, or riding in placid silence. Dori felt a strong sense of joy in seeing Balin return, but tried to stifle his inner voice that he bully claimed that he had missed her presence and his attentions. Instead, he always tried to behave with cold detachment, suggesting however that he was happy that the situation had been resolved without problems.
Nori watched those scenes with great
disappointment, shaking
his head and narrowing his eyes, looking for a way to speed things up
or push
the now static situation. Ori however did not notice that situation
because he
was too interested in Dwalin, in what he did and what he said, trying
to go
unnoticed by an overly attentive Dori.
Dori, on the other hand, really wanted to find a way to get his brother
away
from Fundin's son.
He did not have time to act due to the abrupt quarrel between Thorin and Gandalf, the inconvenience of the trolls (he tried to minimize the incident and not think of his whole family on a spit on a burning brazier, cooked by three hungry trolls) and from the daring and desperate escape from the orcs.
When he began to think again he was leaning against a railing of one of Rivendell's many balconies, admiring the extraordinary panorama and secretly appreciating the architecture and refined taste of the elves. He hated elves, he didn't trust them like any good dwarf, but he admitted that those tall snobbish bastards had a great taste for aesthetics.
He was enjoying the gentle breeze and the scent of flowering plants when he was joined by Balin, who leaned on the railing beside him and smiled softly at him.
"It is a beautiful place despite being the lair of the elves, right?"
“Yes, I have to admit I like it. But the food is bad!"
Balin laughed heartily at Dori's complaint, and Dori tried in every way to hide the smile that was overwhelmingly surfacing on his face. Instead he forced himself to remain impassive and with his typical pouting frown.
“You are really right. Fortunately, lads have found some meat somewhere and are cooking it over an improvised fire. They broke the furniture they found around"
Dori sensed the disapproval in Balin's voice and for a moment wondered if Balin disapproved this type of vandalism or would have preferred to burn the whole valley down. He put that crazy idea aside and looked down to where the rest of the company had camped and feasted loudly.
"You're hungry? Do you want to join them? " Balin asked cautiously, and Dori sensed that Balin was not only there to admire the view and chat amiably about the bizarre architecture of the elves, but he had other purposes unknown to him.
“No, I'm not hungry. We can talk"
Balin was dumbfounded for a split second, taken aback by Dori's sharp response, then he softened his gaze and smiled again.
"Well then. I just wanted to talk to you about something important. It's about Ori-"
"Ori! What does Ori have to do with it now?" Dori exclaimed in alarm and immediately his features became hard. Balin noticed his stiffening and tried to be even more cordial and diplomatic, in the hope of calming the other dwarf.
“Here you see, I noticed that Ori has a great passion for drawing and writing, and honestly a great talent too. Also, he has started writing a kind of travelogue of his own initiative by taking notes on everything that happens and what he sees. You've noticed, haven't you?"
Balin patiently waited for Dori to respond to continue his speech, hoping he was kind enough to soften the other dwarf, but his gaze confirmed that he had not given up.
“Yes, Ori is a very good and very talented dwarf and I didn't need to notice that, I already knew that. Where do you want to go?"
Balin sighed and decided to be just as direct and deal with the matter right away.
“I would like to take Ori as an apprentice scribe. I believe that he has the right qualities to become an excellent- "
"The only thing you want is to find a way to tie Ori to you so that your brother can woo him! No, don't make that surprised face, I noticed how he buzzes around him. This was the reason for your quarrel, wasn't it?"
"In part…" Balin admitted shocked by Dori's explosive reaction.
The dwarf with the mithril hair broke away from the railing and faced the other dwarf with a furious look and a face red with anger.
“Listen to me, Ori is still too young to be wooed, to be an apprentice, for everything! Ori needs me, only I can take care of him. I'm never gonna let anyone hurt him, do you understand? NEVER! Stay away from Ori, you and especially your brother! You won't ruin my sweet little brother!"
His screams were so loud that all the dwarves who camped stopped to listen in shock as the elves who were above the other balconies or around the gardens turned in concern. Even Lord Elrond, who was walking up a small driveway beside Gandalf, stopped speaking and hurried in their direction with a troubled look, followed by the even more troubled wizard.
Dori gasped in outburst as Balin's incredulous, anguished gaze stared at him in silence. Not bearing his weight, he turned his back on him and made the mistake of looking towards the bivouac. Ori was standing next to Nori and Gloin, his face shocked as he wept silently. Dori saw how Nori tried to reassure him by hugging him but Ori struggled and stepped out of Dori's sight. The last thing he saw before walking away mortified and ashamed to look for Ori was Nori's hateful look.
All night Dori had searched for Ori in every corner, garden and room of Rivendell, without finding him. When he finally decided to go back to the others to try to rest a bit, he found Ori clutched in the arms of his brother, who for once was not sleeping next to Bofur.
Dori felt a mix of happiness,
sweetness and anguish and
smiled as his eyes moistened. The memory of Nori falling asleep next to
the
newborn Ori while Dori was taking care of his sick mother surfaced in
his mind
and flooded him with nostalgia and sadness.
He remembered all the details, Nori's faint rhythmic snoring, the
little noises
Ori made in his sleep dreaming who knows what, and the sweet sad smile
of his
mother thanking and praising him as she took a cup of tea from his
hands .
Her words had remained etched in his mind like ink on paper:
Take care of them Dori, I want you all to be happy and healthy. Please promise me you will.
And he had promised.
He took his bed and moved it close to Nori, then fell asleep hugging his brother, who approached him in search of warmth.
*
The next morning, Ori carefully
avoided talking and looking
at Dori, managing to escape from him as soon as he could. Dori suffered
greatly
from that situation and soon became very grumpy and intractable. He did
not
respond to Balin's greeting, who stood looking at him in anguish, and
decided
to walk alone through the beautiful gardens of the elf house.
But he didn't have time to walk down a driveway that Nori caught up
with him
and stopped him by putting a hand on his shoulder.
"We have to talk" he said seriously looking him straight in the eye with his feline gaze.
Dori sensed all the seriousness of the moment, something rare on Nori's part, despite this, he tried to free himself.
"This is not the time Nori, I don't want to hear your silly chatter now"
"Instead you will have to do it, we
must talk about Ori
and the show you gave in front of everyone yesterday" Nori insisted
keeping a firm grip on his brother.
Dori took the red dwarf's hand and twisted it forcing the other to let
go of
his shoulder and move.
“You want to lecture me? Just you who have been wreaking havoc for years that I had to solve by trying to reassure Ori that his brother was not a criminal and that he loved him even though he was never home?"
“We are not talking about me now, but about you! Those things you said yesterday were very cruel and selfish. If Dwalin can woo Ori, if Balin can take him as an apprentice, it's not up to you to decide. Ori is old enough to make decisions, and certainly he is so that he no longer has to be under your constant mother hen protection!"
Dori pointed his finger at Nori menacingly as he looked at him with spite. Nori was really the last person who could lecture him and would not have accepted it from him.
“I don't accept this kind of speech from a hypocrite like you! I have always taken care of you as I promised to our mother, because you are my family, and I will always take care of you, even if you grow up or old until I die! With you I have failed several times, but with Ori it will not happen. Ori deserves to be happy and will be, I'll make it happen!"
At these words Nori got really angry and motioned for Dori to follow him. Dori prepared for a fight like when Nori was a teenager and wanted to challenge his authority, well aware that he could beat him at any time and situation thanks to his incredible strength. Indeed, Dori had to try to calm down otherwise he could have seriously injured his brother.
Nori led him on a path surrounded by
hedges, then through a
small pavilion, then again on a white cobblestone, finally he stopped
in front
of a small dome surrounded by ivy. On a bench Ori was crying in despair
as he
tossed papers and notebooks away from him. In front of him Balin was
trying to
console him by collecting his drawings and his writings and giving them
back to
him trying to get him to stop, but Ori was relentless.
They were too far away to hear their words but it was clear what the
central
argument was.
Dori felt a painful grip in his heart as he saw his brother's sorry state, and Nori pointed at him eagerly as he looked at him with hatred.
"Here look, look how you reduced Ori!" He hissed to avoid being discovered "Does he seem happy?"
At that moment Balin took the small carved wooden casket that contained Ori's writing set in his hands. He tried to hand it to the young dwarf, but he politely refused it, shaking his head. Dori felt his eyes moisten at that gesture. The box had been a gift from him for Ori's twenty years, when Ori had begun to demonstrate his talent for writing and drawing. Dori had worked hard to get the money for that gift, and Ori had appreciated it so much that he almost made it a treasure. Since then he had never separated from that box and had always carried it with him, keeping it with an almost maniacal care.
Tears began to stream down Dori's face and Nori noticed it and felt a surge of pity towards his brother. Placing a hand on his back, he pulled him away from the scene and made him sit on the grass.
“You were a good big brother, Dori, your mom would be proud of you. You can still make things right with Ori, you know what you have to do"
To his surprise, Dori hugged him and held him close to him. Nori was moved and returned his brother's embrace with enthusiasm. They stayed there for a long time, Dori venting his pain in Nori's chest rocking him.
*
Dori waited impatiently as he walked
in a circle on one of
Rivendell's balconies. Every now and then he threw a quick glance at
the stairs
leading to a garden below, the only way to climb that kind of terrace.
The
appointment had been set for tea time, knowing that the elves and the
hobbit
would all be busy drinking who knows what fantastic and exotic blend of
herbs,
certainly accompanied by Gandalf and some curious dwarf.
A very convenient time to discuss private matters without being
disturbed.
Dori took another turn and looked at
the stairs again. He
was at least ten minutes early, despite this, he was waiting for the
others to
arrive as if they were half an hour late.
He had asked Nori to warn all interested parties of that meeting before
lunch,
and now he really hoped that his rascal brother hadn't forgotten that
little
task he had entrusted to him.
But after all it was Nori, was there really to be trusted?
It is an important family matter, he will never be so mean as to forget it! Dori thought, trying to give himself courage and hope.
Finally, he could see Balin's white hair climbing the stairs with some effort, followed by Dwalin's bald head. Dori tensed when he saw the warrior's enormous bulk, but tried to appear as calm and friendly as possible.
"Good afternoon, children of Fundin" He greeted them with kindness and elegance as was his usual.
Balin smiled softly at him with a lively look as Dwalin nodded at him without much courtesy.
"Why did you call us here?" Dwalin
asked as he
crossed his arms and exposed his steel muscles, the typical pose that
promised
so much pain if things went wrong.
Dori was not intimidated, well aware of being able to fight against him
on an
equal footing or even surpass him in strength, despite being much more
in the
flesh than him.
"I wanted to discuss some things about you and my family, but we have to wait for the others to arrive"
"Things about ours and your family?" Balin repeated confusedly.
Dori did not answer and stood
watching the stairs waiting.
Balin began to smooth his beard as he mulled over his words, Dwalin
instead
leaned against a column and kept his menacing gaze fixed on Dori.
It was not long when Nori and Ori arrived, the latter rather amazed to
find
those dwarves on the balcony with his older brother.
"Dori, what does that mean?" He asked shyly as Balin greeted him with a tender smile and Dwalin visibly softened as he walked towards him.
"I asked you to come here to try to resolve some issues that have arisen in recent days" He began with a refined tone, but a nudge and a look from Nori led him to decide to change his approach and be more direct.
“Okay then, I'll be clear: Ori I'm sorry I said those things yesterday and the other days before. You are no longer a child despite my contrary opinion, you are a young adult, and as such you have to start making adult decisions for your future" He turned to Balin who, having already guessed everything, smiled and nodded at him “Balin, you can take Ori as your apprentice if you are still interested, and always if Ori is. And you!" He pointed harshly at Dwalin "If you have serious intentions with my little brother, come forward and be a dwarf with a minimum of honor!"
Dwalin blushed conspicuously with anger. Everyone saw a succession of conflicting emotions distort his face, then the moment passed and the dwarf managed to regain control of himself. He just nodded as Ori ran to hug his older brother.
"Thanks Dori, I love you!"
Dori returned the hug with affection, then he began to instruct Ori on how to behave in a love affair, soon making the speech a sex education lesson. Balin, Nori and Dwalin immediately disappeared embarrassed to hear Dori talk about how Mahal had created the body of the dwarves in a certain way like all animals, and Ori very much wanted to sink underground to get out of that embarrassing situation.
When everything finally ended and Ori
was able to go back to
chatting and playing with the other dwarves without terrifying images
haunting
him, Dori sighed in relief and decided to join Bilbo and Gandalf at the
large
table under a beautiful pavilion where they were serving tea. Now that
everything was settled, that Ori could begin his apprenticeship with
Balin and
that Dwalin was allowed to officially court him, no one would bother
Dori and
his quiet loneliness anymore.
The thought of no longer having Balin around him smiling and listening
to him
whenever he could saddened him, but Dori's iron discipline immediately
stifled
that feeling by branding him stupid and harmful.
Everything was back as before, nothing had changed -not so much- and it
was
better this way.
