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Part 3 of SBI Angsts with a Happy Ending
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Published:
2021-01-31
Completed:
2021-02-16
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3,239
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2/2
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Die happy/Do me a favour, Lycomedes

Summary:

Tommy wants to die. Techno is good at killing.
The Author sucks at summaries.

or

Tommy is suicidal, but the warthm of lava oceans is no longer an option. He needs to find a diffrent way.
He pays a visit to his brother, his enemy, but instead of death he only finds love, support and care.

Notes:

The Author is sad.

Oh, btw. She did the maths. There’s around 813 meters between Techno’s house and Logstedshire.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: just finish me already

Chapter Text

Obsidian's surface felt different underneath Tommy's hand. It was so much colder than he remembered, but also surprisingly smooth despite the rough edges. If he closed his eyes it felt like he was touching a frozen ocean, waves stuck in the middle of movement. 

In reality, the little bulges were oxygen bubbles, which failed to escape from lava. They were too weak, now imprisoned in the almost indestructible material. 

Some of them were so close. A second between them and freedom. 

Tommy was also just a second from freedom back then. He would have been happy to change places with the air. He still remembered the welcoming warmth.

But now, the warmth was no longer an option. Dream took his home, his items, his chance for a peaceful death. 

Tommy didn’t remember gathering blocks. He wasn’t thinking when he was building up.  And as he did it, less and less oxygen in the air, he realised he won't find warmth up there. It was only getting colder. 

Block by block, the hole in the ground got smaller. Just a few blocks lacking, nothing compared to the size of the universe, so why does he care?

His misery got more blurry, stuck on earth as he got lifted. 

He is just a stupid, worthless child. No one needs him, no one misses him, he realized.

And the earth hurt so much, so he chose the sky.

Sun was setting. From such a height, he could see how the snow turned gold and orange. 

Tommy wondered if once he jumps, the world drowning in warm colors will make him feel okay. 

If it’d feel like those evenings in the Antarctic Empire in front of the fireplace. He felt dizzy, the world spinning so fast. He didn't remember when was the last time he had eaten.

But then again, maybe he didn’t deserve it... Dream would sometimes bring him meals. When Tommy was obedient, and the older one felt like it. 

Sunsets were something he would always be grateful for. They were so peaceful and gave him the chance to lie to himself that he was sitting in front of the fire. 

Any minute now, Wilbur would bring his guitar and sing quietly. Tommy would be falling asleep, resting on Phil's shoulder. Technoblade would tell some amazing stories, his deep voice so relaxing. 

Fire would crackle, and he would be so safe. The next day he would hang out with one of his brothers or his dad, adventures awaiting at every corner. They would be sometimes scary or tiring, but then they would all watch the sunset. Sweet conversations about nothing, air around so warm. 

He would give all the discs in the world for one more evening like that. 

But no earthly possessions could make this dream come true. Wilbur was dead. Technoblade hated him. Phil didn’t care about him. 

All that was left for him was cold.  

Tommy could only wish he jumped back then, into the warmth, because all he had left was cold. 

He took out his last hope. A picture, a piece of paper with some colors on them, a thing so cheap and so dear to him. 

The picture was taken away from his hands, by the cruel wind. It flew, it's just a toy for the world. Just like he was a toy for Dream, when he was flying. 

Tied by strings, moving as the puppeteer decided. 

So he cut all strings in the final attempt at control, and followed the photograph. And he was finally free. 

Until he heard the familiar sounds of his dad’s wings. Hope filled his heart for a split second, as he looked around. Maybe someone, anyone, did care for him after all. But there was no one around. 

He was falling, rushing to meet the ground before the orange colors disappear, before greys take their place, before the sweet image of his dad actually caring could turn out to be a fantasy. 

He landed in a cold lake, water like a wall of ice, such an opposite of where he wanted to be. Oxygen had more courage to get to the surface than him. He followed it eventually, when some primal part of his brain felt him choking on water. 

He felt so defeated when he lied down on the shore. Maybe he was crying. Maybe not. He couldn't tell anymore. Any spare clothing he had was blown up. No warmth. Again. He didn’t know how many minutes passed before he stood up. 

He stepped into something. Oh, of course. 

He forgot blue dye was now everywhere. Such a shame he lacked his shoe, his sock now turning indigo. 

Ghostbur. A shadow of what his brother once was. But then again, he had one thing Tommy envied so much. He was happy.

Tommy wanted so badly to be happy. He envied the warmth of his father's arms as a last memory. 

He'd give so much for that. 

Philza probably didn’t even care about him enough to end him. Will was always a better child. He wished someone could finish him off. Free that desperate bubble stuck in obsidian.

He wanted to enter the Nether so badly. He didn't know whether to go to people he once knew or just to welcome the sweet embrace of death. He didn’t know if he would like to see L’Manburg one last time. Maybe then Dream would kill him, no face expression behind the smiling mask. He could see Tubbo before it would be over. 

Tubbo is happier without you around , reminded him Dream’s voice, a memory that didn’t let him sleep. He never visited you. He doesn’t care. He burned the compass.

His tired mind stuck in the painful memory of cozy evenings was helpful for once. He still had someone left.  Someone who not only wished him death and was competent at the job, but also could almost replicate his father's sweet embrace. 

If almost meant a bittersweet, filled with laughter, but quick a death, executed by someone who was once his best friend, his hero, his protector. 

He roughly knew the direction. By the time it was completely dark, he didn't care if a mob killed him. He was ready to accept it. 

Maybe it was just meant to be like that.  

He wasn't eating much lately and it showed. He was so tired when walking through the snowy biome. Each step took away so much energy, it felt like his muscles only moved driven by his willpower. 

To say he was cold was an understatement. He was shivering, he was starving and the cold turned into pain. As if needles were pushed into his bones, his muscle tissue ripped off from the inside, the temperature finally making him feel something. His fingers hurt hurt hurt so badly. 

He lost any sense of direction, the world around a snowy desert. 

He realized what would happen to him. 

A lonely, cold death. As if to seal that thought, an arrow went through his leg, right above his ankle. He didn't care. Compared to the excruciating pain of frostburns he barely felt the burning sensation.

He smiled when he saw light. It was a tired, honest one. 

All that pain would soon come to an end.  There was light and he was so sure it was a lava pool. He was going to be so warm. 

He limped further, continuing his journey, new motivation in his sick mind, ignoring the high whistle another arrow made, missing his head by half a meter. 

Disappointed. He was so disappointed when he saw the cozy house, instead of a lava pool. He made his way to the door and was about to knock, but realized what he came for. 

He took his last look at the stars. All visible and beautiful. A night like this reminded him of his childhood years in the Antarctic Empire. 

What a lovely last sight. He could almost make himself believe dad was somewhere nearby. 

He no longer wanted warmth. He just wanted the cold and pain, oh the agonizing pain, to be gone. 

He opened the door, his brother's reaction time as perfect as always. Sword ready, Techno standing in a fighting stance. The chest shut itself loudly. 

Tommy curled himself a little at the noise before regaining control quickly. 

Technoblade lowered his sword, and a somewhat worried expression appeared on his face, but the younger saw only annoyance.

"Tommy?" 

"Hey, Blade." Tommy didn't realize when his voice got so weak. "Listen. I'm here for a favor.” 

Technoblade thought he knew exactly what his brother's next words were gonna be. 

He was going to agree, but first get his brother into a better state, because gods help, he looked terrible.

"Kill me." Tommy said so casually. "Please." 

Something in those grey eyes, the peace with which it was said, made Techno feel an foreign emotion, one rather close to fear.

"...What?" 

"I tried falling from a cliff and I realised what I lack. 

So, Blade, can you just finish me off? Y'know, be Lycomedes to my Theseus?"

Techno didn't laugh at that attempt of a joke.

Tommy felt his limbs hurting so much, the warm air felt like it was burning him from the inside. 

He felt dizzy and he just wanted to rest. But his brother, his enemy, his childhood hero just stood there. A slight wave of desperation made Tommy shout. 

"You didn't have a problem sending fucking withers at me, so why can't you just finish the job now?" he was crying, but he didn't care. "Can you just for once in your life- If you ever, ever cared- Please, I beg you. If you ever, even one day thought of me as a brother. " The peaceful evenings hurt Tommy so much more than the arrow in his leg. "Please, just let me have this. Let me rest. " 

He took a step. He touched the netherite blade with his palm, ready to guide it to his chest, but the weapon was thrown away. 

He was hugged.

And it was so wrong on every level, he hated it and he wanted to punch, to scream, to scream at himself, at his enemy, for him to stop pretending like he cares, like he ever cared.

He hated how right it felt and he hated how quickly his mind lost all pride, melting into the human touch he was stripped off for so long. 

And he despised how quickly he felt so warm and safe and the enemy was gone. Suddenly he was back in the Antarctic Empire, safe and sound, his older brother ready to protect him with deadly accuracy, tell him stories at night if he couldn’t sleep. 

Suddenly Wilbur never shouted at him, Tubbo was never shot, TNT sounds weren't causing him to cry throughout the night. 

Dream couldn't hurt him, because Techno would never let him do so. 

He melted into that sweet fantasy, as the sudden warmth or maybe blood loss took away his consciousness. 

Technoblade didn't quite know what to do when Tommy passed out. The boy was very cold, but also so horribly thin. Was he even eating at all?

You are a terrible brother. 

He brought his own bed from upstairs and placed it near the fireplace. He didn’t own many blankets, so he took his thickest cape and put it over his young brother. 

Sleeping, bruised and so horribly thin, he really did look like a child others so often forgotten he still was. 

Techno cursed quietly, before promising himself to take care of Tommy. 

Chapter 2: Dream as a Nightmare

Summary:

Tommy has a nightmare.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Explosions were everywhere. Wilbur was standing in front of Tommy, a single match burning the tips of his fingers. He was standing on a dozen TNT, laughing maniacally.

And Tommy was screaming, begging for something, running to catch the match before his brother dies. 

Explosions turned into fireworks and Tubbo's body fell into the blonde's arms. His eyes were unmoving, his chest colored in red and black, the smell of burned flesh overtaking Tommy's thinking. 

He turned around to see his brother, a king wearing a skull. Sky turned grey. Purple fire surrounded the pinkette and Withers were everywhere. His friends' screams filled the air. 

The whole world was shredded to pieces by TNT and Wilbur was laughing, the sound wicked and terrifying. 

Tommy was running and the world was collapsing right underneath his feet, he was barely keeping enough momentum to stay aboard. 

But no matter how fast he ran, Dream was catching up. The older man walked slowly, with a smile. And the road was getting longer and longer and he was so, so exhausted from running.

He saw his best friend. They could still make it, escape from Dream and live a peaceful life somewhere far away. 

He grabbed Tubbo's hand. 

"We need to run!" 

But the brunette held him in a tight grip, not letting him make a single step more.

And his horns were covering a part of his face with a shadow. 

And suddenly Tubbo turned into Dream. 

"I'm your only friend." said the blond man holding his wrist with enough force for it to hurt. 

"I'm better off without you" said Tubbo with horns, a wicked spark in his eyes. 

"He burned the compass." 

"Dream, escort him out" 

"He never cared." 

"I was never your best friend."

"I'm your only friend."

And the voices switched and blurred into one. A friend and an enemy but Tommy couldn't tell who was who when Dream let him fly and Tubbo wore Schlatt's suit. 

"Let's be the bad guys." 

A wicked laughter filled the world. Explosions were everywhere. 

The nether portal broke, little purple crystals fell into the mud. 

"Then die like one."

He woke up in cold sweat, his heart beating so fast. The blue cape he was covered with fell onto the wooden floor. 

"Toms?" 

Technoblade wasn't wearing his mask. Tommy would never admit it aloud, but he hated the white skull. His brother's hair was slightly shorter than it used to, parted somewhere near the middle, showing an emerald earring surrounded by gold in one of his ears. 

His clothing was clean and neat, he wasn't wearing any armor, just a buttoned up shirt and high waisted leather pants. 

Tommy felt horribly aware of how pathetically he looked. Ripped clothes. Bruises. Not to mention, he could easily count his ribs through the hole in this t-shirt. 

"Finally awake. Want somethin' to eat?" 

He stood up, only to fall onto the bed. 

Everything was a blur once again.

Someone was waiting for him to wake up. The world was spinning and Tommy wasn't sure if it was his brother or Dream smiling at him. 

He was blinking. Was he still dreaming? 

It didn't feel like a dream. Was he sleep deprived enough to hallucinate? 

Flint and steel clicked. 

And Tommy spiraled. He curled up, all his muscle tensing, arms covering his head to protect it from the impact. 

The burning air was supposed to come any second and all the hours and sweat of the past days were to turn to ash. And he would be cold and hungry. 

Could Dream burn his items? Oh, of course. Yet, he enjoyed the frightened expression of the kid each time he took out TNT. 

Dream didn't need to mention L'Manburg. The explosions brought it all and more. And that wicked laughter rang in Tommy's head until dawn. 

"Toms, um, you're okay. Shh. It's okay. " 

His brother was hugging him. Nothing blew up. 

He didn't realise he was crying. He hid into the familiar arms. He hated himself for it. 

He betrayed his only friend and he would have to pay. The temporary warmth he felt would be taken away, as Dream takes his last brother from him. 

Then again, he doubted Technoblade could die. But he was certain he was more than able to abandon him. 

A stupid, annoying child. The wrong brother died during the war, Tommy knew that. He knew he didn't matter much.

He remembered how he was trapped under a piston. It was so terrifying to him back then. Nobody cared enough to get him out. 

He took care of his wounds alone after Techno beat him up. "It stays in the pit." 

His brother said. 

He always cared more about Wilbur. Tommy was just a nuisance. A bother. 

A worthless piece of a human. A meat bag nobody cared about. A loud, annoying problem. 

So why hasn't Techno killed him yet? 

It would be so easy. He came and asked for it. Why could his brother take countless lives but not the one he begged him to take? 

"I talked to d- Phil." the monotone voice sounded. "He'll be here tomorrow."

So, that was it? 

He was only kept alive because of Philza? 

"He doesn't care, Techno." he said quietly. "He didn't even visit me once." 

Tommy moved away to look at the pinkette, only to meet his confused glare. 

"You don't have to keep me alive for him." 

Technoblade signed. 

"I'm sorry." he said, and it might've been the first time the blond had heard that phrase from his brother. "I'm sorry I was such a horrible brother." he signed, exhaustion audible in the sound. 

"You…?" 

They were silent for a moment. 

"I made food. And got you some clothing."

Tommy heard both Phil and Techno were wearing different outfits lately. 

Getting the fluffy, blue cape almost made him tear up. 

All Tommy's existential doubts suddenly felt less crippling at the realisation of how extremely hungry he was. 

The chicken soup was delicious. Or maybe he was just starving, which was more probable, judging by Techno's usual cooking skills. 

After three bowls of soup, he was full.

He leaned against his brother and closed his eyes, just for a moment. It felt like his childhood. 

When he woke on the bed, he didn't remember any nightmares. He wasn't cold.

Technoblade stayed, he realized. His brother stayed in the same room the whole time, making sure the fire was still burning, keeping him warm. 

Making sure he was safe.  

Warmth.

He finally found warmth. 

The feeling of safety was slowly petting his hair, warmth holding him in his embrace. 

Fluffy cape hugged his thin figure, Technoblade's smell lingering in the fur, protecting him from any threat. 

Cookies placed on the little table filled the air with childhood memories, and Phil's warm voice. The sound he could almost hear made his mind at peace. 

The wind outside was very loud, it was snowing heavily. But it was a whole world away for Tommy, as a scenery from a television screen. 

He was safe. House walls protected him from the wind. And the cold. And the mobs.

He had food.

It was all too good to be true. 

But then it hit him. 

Dream would look for him. 

"I need to go. " he stated. "I need to go back. Dream will be so, so, so angry when he realises-, when he finds out I'm not there." It would end so bad bad bad bad. "He'll kill you and Dad!" 

Tommy started panicking. He stood up quickly, ready to head outside, but realized his brother was laughing. 

"Tommy. I already fought Dream once." the pinkette said with a smile. This made Tommy stop midway to the door. 

"How- how did you make it out alive?" 

Technoblade smirked.

"I won." 

Notes:

Hello. If u want me to write more.
U can Comment.

I write for comments.

If you want to help me choose angst to write next, visit the comments.

Notes:

Dear Reader,

I want to make sure you know you are appreciated and even if we are to never exchange a single message, I’m very happy you exist.

The life is still before you, everything that’s wrong will be fixed. You will achieve your goals, you’ll be proud of yourself.

It was a pleasure to host this little story for you.

-Forever yours, Author

PS
Comments are greatly appreciated

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