Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Albedo is what you could consider the school ace. He's the valedictorian, a shining beacon for his classmates and even the teachers themselves. He excels in all fields ranging from mathematics, chemistry, and writing. Though nobody could really say for sure, it’s widely assumed that he excels in the arts too, as he can be seen in the art room for hours afterschool, his large canvas positioned in a way where no one could see what was being put on it. He also was frequently drawing in his sketchbook, his azure eyes rarely seen as his ash blonde hair tended to shield his entire face. See, he’s a beacon sure, but very much unreachable. All eyes are on him, but nobody dare get any closer. Why would they? He let off a cold and icy aura, and with a plain, unreadable expression to match. Either way though, any student caring for their academic standing severely envies him.

One of these students is Sucrose, though she wouldn’t really call it envy. She wasn’t that type of person. More like awe. Could someone like that really exist? Could someone really obtain knowledge with such ease? Though she soon figured talent like that must’ve come at a price, since she never saw him interact with anyone. He kept his eyes glued to his sketchbook, drawing whatever he seemingly felt like drawing, not that anyone got to see of course. Sucrose did envy one thing about him though. He was talented in mostly any area of course, but he seemed especially good at anything science related. In that way, Sucrose could relate to him. She admittedly excelled in science, though she barely made it in any other course. And art? She’d prefer to not think about it.

She actually shared a few courses with Albedo, as well as their lunch period, though she often forgot. Chemistry was one of them. Sucrose never found an opportunity to spark conversation with him though, despite her wanting to. She also found herself relating to Albedo in that she never had many people to hang around either. Sucrose mulled these thoughts over as she sat in her seat for chemistry, expecting the usual.. Listen to the teacher ramble for forty-five minutes and leave. Maybe take a few notes where he does make sense. That's how it always was. The bell rang, and the teacher started to speak.

“Today you’re going to be paired into groups for an assignment. Please communicate thoroughly with your partner.” Did he shoot a look at Albedo for a moment there, or was Sucrose just seeing things? “I’ll be calling out your names and your partners. Please listen carefully. I’d rather not repeat myself.”

And so he did. He read from a list, the paper a little more than an inch from his face as his tired eyes made out the words. The pairs seemed awfully random. Seemingly very little thought was put into who would make a good pair. Did he think putting Hu Tao and Chongyun together would go well at all? There was already a ruckus, but Sucrose did her best to ignore it. Names were called and pairs were formed, one by one they made their way to each other, but soon enough there were two people left who hadn’t been called. Herself, and the guy who still had his eyes on his sketchbook, only half listening for his name. Albedo glanced up, a little surprised he never heard his own name.
“You’re the only two I haven’t called. So stop looking at me. I’d like to assume you’re smart enough.” Then the teacher sat back in his desk, rereading the book he’d read a thousand times.

Couldn’t he have just called their names? Sucrose let out a sigh. He wasn’t a very nice teacher. Either way she knew what he meant. Sucrose quickly gathered her things, though before she could even stand, Albedo was already beside her. “No need.” He sat down, his sketchbook pressed to his side as to remain closed. Come to think of it, this was the first time she’d heard his voice so clearly outside of the valedictorian speeches he had to give against his will every so often.

‘Good first impressions Sucrose! Those are important, you know? Don’t mess this up!’ Sucrose’s mind was going a mile a minute, though she was very quickly interrupted.

“Did you say something? Sorry… I couldn’t quite catch it.” She must’ve thought out loud… She was already messing it up! Sucrose had to scramble for an excuse.

“O-oh! It was nothing important. I was just reminding myself not to mess up the dinner I’ll be making when I get home!”

“Ah I see…”

...Silence. Truth be told Sucrose was no better at socializing than Albedo. This proved her theory the teacher put no thought into the pairings. Either way, the project needed to be started since it did look a little bulky.

“We..we should get started! After all, it seems like a pretty long assignment.” She picked up the thick looking packet and let it drape, revealing what looked like at the very least ten different pages, all packed to the brim with words front and back. She couldn’t help but stare. It seemed everyone else in the room had just gotten a look too. Replacing the loud chatter that once filled the space was now cold, dead silence. A twig could break miles away and it would be heard loud and clear. Albedo even looked a little shocked.

For the first time in the history of ever, Albedo broke the silence. “Let's get started then. There seems to be a lot to do…” From the looks of it, this was a daunting task for even the school's ace. Sucrose sighed and started looking through the packet, her eyes bouncing around the page, looking for something helpful or easy to start off with. This would take forever, but at least she had somebody so skilled by her side. This felt like an opportunity to get to know him better, and for that at least she was thankful.

For days after they tirelessly worked. Writing reports, a presentation, a physical product, all being produced. Sucrose did her best to spark conversation throughout the ordeal. Abedo seemed to be doing the same, though it always felt like he was reading off a list of small talk starters. “The weather is nice,” looked to be his favorite. Still, one conversation in particular stood out in her memory.

“Albedo, if you don’t mind me asking of course, what are you drawing all the time? You seem to be so absorbed by it..”

“Hold on for a moment…” He reached into his bag, shuffling through various notebooks and binders. He pulled out an incredibly thick book. It was brown and leather bound with a nice shade of gold lining the edge of each page. It almost looked like it had never been used a day in it’s life. He opened up to a random page in the book with little thought put into which one. “Here. I hope this is satisfactory.”

None of the space was wasted here. The page was covered head to toe in flowers of a variety Sucrose couldn’t quite put a finger on, wild animals seeming jumping off the page, and what looked to be the view he got from the window in his little corner, his little world. It seemed the common assumption was all too true. Albedo excelled at everything. Even art. Was she forgetting something? How long had she been staring? Right! Sucrose quickly looked up.

“These are really beautiful! You really do have a knack for this! Are you in any art classes by chance? You ought to show these off more often!” Sucrose really did mean it. These were amazing!

“I’m not in any sort of class. It can always be better though. I’m not really sure how to respond..sorry...I’ve never been asked to show my works before.”

“Really? Never?” Albedo looked down with a slight frown, and it hit her. Though you couldn’t see it, Albedo seemingly always had an impenetrable, icy shield up at all times. Quiet and unexpressive, nobody ever put much effort into approaching him and since he could never make an approach himself, he remained by his lonesome. Sucrose was stricken by curiosity now. What was previously awe and a little shred of envy was now fully replaced by the intense desire to learn more about this guy, however odd that thought was in retrospect. “Um, if it’s not too much to ask, where do you get the ideas for what you draw?”

“I only draw things that capture my interest. Why waste time with something I have little to no interest in?” That hit a little harder than it should’ve.

“Oh! Makes sense. If I’m going to be honest, I’m a little jealous…”

“Jealous? Why's that?”

“I’ve always been a poor artist. To tell you the truth I’ve always been kind of bad at anything not related to sciencey type stuff.”

Albedo looked to be in thought for a moment, but was quickly brought back to reality by his own volition. “Are you particularly interested in those things?”

“Not really…”

“Then it makes sense. Like I said, why waste time on things you have no interest in?” That actually did make a lot of sense. Still, just because she wasn’t interested in things like writing or history, it didn’t mean she could ignore them completely! She still had grades to keep up!

“I get what you mean! But my grades don’t really care what I’m interested in, do they? I’m trying, I really am! If only tutors weren’t so expensive.” Sucrose let out a sigh. Albedo raised an eyebrow and put his hand to his chin.

“I could possibly help you out during our Lunch period. We share one right? That’s only if you want me too.” He looked at her expecting a quick answer. His eyes were piercing. Sucrose ended up a little flustered. This was real right? Albedo, in the grand scheme of things, was just another highschooler like her, but this felt like a huge honor! She’d be a fool to turn it down right?

“Are you sure? I would hate to waste your time! Surely there are better things you could be doi-”

“Sucrose.” She shut up real fast. “It's not an issue. Believe me. I rarely do anything of importance during that time period anyways. I’m happy to be of assistance.”

She could’ve cried on the spot. “Thank you so so much! I’ll do my absolute best! You can count on it!” Sucrose had a big grin painted across her face, one that just happened to catch some attention. Albedo wore a small grin of his own, a lot for someone like him. “I’m looking forward to it.” He looked back down to his packet, and though he’d never let Sucrose, or anybody else for that matter see, he had a bit of pink dusted on his cheeks.

It was like this for about a week. Everyday, in the classes leading up to lunch, the two would exchange a glance or two. Sucrose would wave and Albedo would respond back with a small grin. Then lunchtime came and they would barely eat, spending their time on study. Everyday she felt the occasional stare. Whether it be bewilderment, awe, envy, she could never figure it out, though they never lasted long. Albedo would look at them right back, and they quickly turned back around. He never glared or anything. Just looked.

One day, Sucrose asked about it.

“I’m not sure why, but everyone seems to be intimidated by me when I look at them. I’m not sure why… Say, Sucrose. Am I scary looking?” Sucrose looked at him for a moment. She never took too much time to look at his face. I mean really look at it. He was attractive. Wait, but that wasn’t what was being asked was it? Now she had herself a little flustered. Albedo leaned in a little closer. “Is that a yes?” He looked a little...smug?

Sucrose swatted her hands in front of her. “Of course not, of course not! Not scary at all! You look great!”

“Great?” He leaned back to his original position, placing a hand behind his head. Great. Just great. Now Sucrose found herself in a weird position.

“You know… like not scary! Really!” Albedo put a hand to his chin and softly chuckled. He looked back up to her with a smile.

“I know what you meant.” Did he? Did she? She learned then that he had a pretty smile. One capable of shooting a small twang through her heart, though for simplicity’s sake she ignored it.

Another day, Sucrose figured they should actually eat. She rummaged through her bag, looking for a specific box. She felt more and more panic setting in as she looked.

“Is something the matter?” Albedo looked at her with a confused expression. He leaned over to her. “You look distressed.”

“Yeah.. I think I forgot my food at home! Of course, one time I think of making my lunch kind of cute looking too…” She reached into another pocket and grabbed a couple of small candies. They were a mint green color, slightly resembling her hair. She sighed and ate one of the candies.

“I thought you forgot your food?” He was now leaning on the table.

“Oh! I did. But I always carry some candies around. Would you like one?”

Albedo seemed a little surprised by the offer. He sat up. “Sure. What brand are these, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“They don’t have a brand. I-I actually made these myself! It’s a hobby of mine. I always like to carry candy around, since I have a bit of a sweet tooth…” Sucrose looked away, almost looking ashamed, though Albedo kept her gaze on her. She handed him another mint green candy. He popped it into his mouth, closing his eyes and staying quiet for a good ten seconds. “Is it bad? I’m so sorry!”

He flinched and quickly opened his eyes. “No no. This is actually really, really good. Sorry. I guess I got caught up in the flavor. Would you mind if I had another?”

It was a little shocking! Did he like them that much? “Of course! Here here....” Sucrose pulled out a golden candy, honey flavored. “I hope you like it!”

For the rest of that lunch period, they ate candy. One by one Albedo tried each flavor Sucrose had brought. Apple, cherry, strawberry, banana, and so on. And each one was a huge success! “Say, you said you forgot your meal right? I actually have some food leftover… Would you like some?”

“Ah… I’m actually full from the candies.”

So it went on. Their tutoring sessions never failed to turn into simple conversation, even if about a common interest. Sucrose really enjoyed his company, surprisingly enough. The entire time though, a fear ran through her mind. Did he enjoy hers? Even though he offered, she still felt a strange sense of guilt, like she was forcing him to be around her. After all, didn’t he always prefer his solitude? Voicing these concerns, she feared, would only push Albedo away. She certainly didn’t want to do that because, putting all her fears aside, she really enjoyed the time they spent together.

A quiet Friday evening, Sucrose found herself walking through the school hallways, passing classroom and classroom. Through the windows she could see a variety of things. In one room, was Chongyun and Hu Tao, bickering about the long chemistry project which they had failed to get anything substantial done on. It seemed Xingqiu was a mediator. In another room was Bennett and Razor discussing something Sucrose couldn’t seem to make out. Soon though, she was by the art room. Or at least one of them. She started to think about dinner for that night, though before she could figure it out, she saw Albedo walking out of the art room. Sucrose, for a reason she didn’t know, hid behind the corner and watched as he walked off. Why? She knew he wouldn’t have any negative reactions to seeing her, and it’s not like she had any reason to avoid him. But as she emerged from her place of hiding and continued her walk, she paused.

The canvases… the ones he always left them turned, for no one to see. Sucrose put a hand on the door knob. It was unlocked. ‘I’d be intruding right? I shouldn’t.” But curiosity killed the cat. She quietly entered the art room, feeling the need to be stealthy about it. It was a room open to everyone sure, but for the longest time, it felt like Albedo’s territory. In retrospect, he probably wouldn’t care if anyone else used it, but it still felt extremely wrong. He had a single canvas up, facing the window and the outside world in which the sun was starting to set. It was a beautiful sunset, but Sucrose really couldn’t care less.

She stood herself behind the canvas and her blood ran cold. Hot? Maybe hot was more accurate. She felt heat in her face, and her heart rate had jumped. She was just thankful nobody was here to see it, because on the canvas was a portrait of her in amazing detail. It was a headshot of her, a smile across her face, a little bit of pink on her cheeks.

“I only draw things that capture my interest. Why waste time with something I have little to no interest in?”

Those words. Those words rang over and over again in her head. They were all she thought about as she quickly left the building, and they were all she thought about for so long after.

Chapter Text

It had been a week since that day. A week since Sucrose had seen that portrait. It was all she ever thought about and when she looked in the mirror and smiled, she saw herself on the canvas all over again. It was strange. She herself felt different, but nothing around her had changed. The chemistry project had ended. Chongyun and Hu Tao’s presentation was bad, but at least aesthetically pleasing due to Xingqiu’s outside (And illegal) help. She still sat far away from Albedo in class, and Albedo still tutored her everyday during lunch.

On the inside though, everything had changed. She was a fumbling mess.

“Are you alright, Sucrose? These past couple of days, you’ve looked unwell.” Albedo broke her day dream state into two. He stared directly at her, into her eyes, but she couldn’t find it in herself to look back. If she were to make eye contact, if she were to look into his eyes, the color of her face would betray her feelings entirely.

“O-oh yes… I’m fine! Why do you ask…?’

Albedo seemed not to notice when she blushed around him. Or he at least pretended not to.

“Are you really sure? I noticed your face is a little red today…” So much for him not noticing. He leaned over her and put his hand on her forehead. She had to resist the urge to flinch back. “You’re a little warm too. Are you really fine? Please, be honest with me...” Sucrose felt the urge to look away, but she instead reached up and grabbed his arm. It had a little more muscle than she was expecting. Wait! But that wasn’t the point at all!

“I’m fine. Really I am! Believe me.” She tried to sound sincere, though she managed to trip and fall over each and every one of her words. Albedo didn’t look convinced at all, tilting his head and resting on his hand. He stared at her for another second before she broke. “I guess I haven’t been sleeping well…” It was technically true. It wasn’t a lie if she was only omitting certain details, right?

“Do you know why?” He sat up and leaned onto the table. Was he… concerned? “It’s not good to miss out on so much sleep. If you know why, maybe it’ll help. Have you tried medicine? Or warm milk?” It felt like she was being bombarded with questions! Truth be told, she knew exactly why. These thoughts and feelings kept her up all night. About the portrait, about him. Negative? No no, of course not. She couldn’t find it in herself to think of him in a negative light. It was a really nice portrait after all. Her feelings were more confused than anything. There wasn’t really a good way to describe them.

Sucrose didn’t feel it was necessary to say all those things though. He didn’t even know she saw it. A little white lie wouldn’t hurt, surely. “I don’t really know… I guess I’ll try out some medicine.”

Albedo grinned his signature, tiny little grin and nodded. Sucrose loved when he smiled like that. “I’m glad. Please do your best to get some sleep.” She nodded.

“I’ll try my best.”

Don’t be mistaken now, Sucrose still enjoyed every day she was ‘tutored’ by Albedo. The tutoring sessions barely lasted ten minutes if that. Instead they would just become long conversations as always. Everyday she felt the stares of her classmates stemming from feelings she couldn’t pinpoint, and it always seemed like the minute she felt surrounded, Albedo scared them off with a single glance. Everyday she would exchange looks with Albedo during classes. A wave and a smile. Everyday for the next couple of weeks, it was all the same. It really seemed that nothing had changed at all. Why was that a little painful?

“Sucrose, did you bring those candies again today?” The question had caught her a little off guard. “Sorry for asking all of a sudden, but I really liked them last time.” It had been awhile since he first had them. A couple weeks now was it?

“Ah of course! I always have them on me… You know, you can have them whenever.” She took out a large pouch of candies in a variety of flavors.

“I had just felt bad asking before. I’d hate to drain your entire stock.”

“N-no! It’s no problem at all. I’m always making more anyways!” She quickly fished out a honey flavored candy and handed it to him.

“Thank you… This flavor is actually my favorite of the ones you made.” He held it up and stared at it for a moment. “It kinda looks like your eyes. Just a little.” With that, he quickly ate it. Sucrose took a second to process that last comment. Was that something he really paid so much attention to? Maybe it was just an artist thing. At least that was what Sucrose wanted to think. It was a lot simpler of a thought.

“My eyes? I mean, I guess I can kind of see it. The mint ones kind of look like yours. But your eyes are a whole lot prettier than these little candies-” Sucrose shut herself up right then and there when she noticed Albedo staring at her, his eyes widened, seemingly a little shocked. To be fair, his expression was always a little hard to read, so maybe she was overanalyzing it. To be fair, it was part of the reason people were afraid to approach him, after all.

“Pretty…” Albedo put a hand to his chin and looked away. “The mint ones...they’re also pretty good.” It was a little awkward now. Something strange neither of them could or wanted to identify hung over them for the rest of the lunch period. The very next day though, Sucrose arrived with a large bag filled to the brim with only honey and mint candies.

It was a cool Sunday night. Sucrose had already changed into pajamas and taken out her ponytail, leaving her hair down. She never saw Albedo on the weekends. No reason to after all. He was only a tutor. Well, Sucrose herself at least considered him a close friend. She, for some reason, desperately hoped Albedo thought the same about her. That Sunday night, she found herself thinking about the Monday ahead of her. She’d see Albedo once again, just like she always did. She’d go to class and it would all be the same as ever.

She looked forward to it though. Lunch, if she really had to be specific. She looked forward to Albedo tutoring her. She looked forward to improving her grades. Their conversations. His voice. The way he spoke to her. The way he looked at her. The way he could deflect all looks with just a glance. His eyes. The way the light made them sparkle. His hair, the way it fell on his shoulders, and the way he tied it back. The way that when the sun directly hit him, his hair radiated a golden glow. The way his pencil glided across his sketchbook and the way he held it with such ease, grace, and intent. The way he smiled at little things, and the way that smile made her feel. The way he-

She had to stop there. It would be bad to continue. Her thoughts were going a million miles a second. No way could this be good for anyone. ‘I look forward to learning and a pleasant conversation. That's all there is to it.’ Nevertheless, Sucrose buried her face in a pillow. Was it normal to think about someone like that? Surely it was. It’s just how friends are, right? Sucrose didn’t have many friends, so she had little to go off of. Surely this was just a friend thing though. It had to be.

Sucrose hopped up from her bed. It was late, but she suddenly felt the need to eat. Off to the kitchen she went. She needed to think about something else. She glanced at the large jars sitting on the kitchen counter. The mint and honey candies were running low. Sucrose sighed and started the preparations to make a new batch or the honey candies. She looked forward to giving them to Albedo on Monday. ‘No! I’m not supposed to be thinking about that right now. Just bake.’ That was a little hard to do. She could only associate these candies with him anymore. She sighed once more and put away all her ingredients. She grabbed a few mint candies and went back to her room. She quickly went through them and buried her face back into her pillow, She decided to let her thoughts run wild again.

She looked forward to their tutoring session. A lot. Sucrose stood up to take a good long look at herself in the mirror. Though when she really stared, she realized something. She really didn’t care about the tutoring at all much anymore. She only looked forward to him.

Without the assistance of eye contact, her face changed colors. A vibrant pink graced her face and she was glad Albedo wasn’t there to see it. She realized it then, but saying the words directly was a bit too much to handle at the current moment. ‘I like him.’ She tried to say the words aloud but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. She looked a little similar to the portrait then, maybe a little bit redder.

The Monday after, when she sat down for lunch, she pulled out a large bag of candies. Every flavor except honey and mint. She looked down in an attempt to hide whatever embarrassing expression she was making.

“I’m sorry. I ran out of the honey and mint.”

Chapter Text

Winter arrived all too fast. What was once green soon turned to a golden brown, and then everything became white. Snow covered everything it could possibly think to cover, and finally, those large jackets finally got some time out of the depths of everyone’s closet. Sucrose found that winter was her favorite time of year. Sure the snow was cold and she often got sick during this time, but it also felt so comforting and even romantic in a weird way. She found herself prone to cold, so she liked to sit by a fire, all bundled up with a cup of hot chocolate and a few too many marshmallows. Yes, it was her favorite time of year, though every winter memory of hers took place by herself.

Now she had someone else to associate it with.

Albedo seemed to fit winter a little too well. He was cold, hard to approach, uninviting to those who felt little need to put an effort. But that wasn’t true at all, was it? No no. He was like winter sure, but he was more like warm lights and a comforting fire. At the very least, that’s what Sucrose thought of him. He wasn’t so uninviting at all.

She knew this for a variety of reasons. She knew this because of the way he’d help her back to her feet as she slipped over the icy ground. She knew this because of how he’d softly brush the snow off of her nose and chuckle as he did. And she knew this because of the way the snow made him smile.

“You know, I’ve always wanted to visit somewhere where it always snows.” She remembered him saying that. “Maybe not to live there, but for a visit. I mean, imagine how much there is still left to find... “ He then caught a small bit of snow on the tip of his finger. He smiled again. By the gods, Sucrose really loved that smile. He blew the small, delicate snow off his finger and rested his head on the very same hand. “I’m fortunate that we get any snow at all I suppose. Oh. You have a bit of snow on your hair.”

Albedo leaned over her, lightly dusting the ice off of her head. She liked the feeling. He quickly sat back down into his original position. “Ah..! Thank you...Say, what do you like so much about the snow anyhow?”

“Hm? I figured you’d understand. You’re quite the fan of winter too, right?”

“I guess you could say that, but I prefer to stay inside by some sort of fire, you know? Or all those lights that get put up.” She was grinning just thinking about it.

“I like those things too, but I guess part of the reason I enjoy the snow so much is the uniqueness of it, and how shortly it lasts. Here at least, it only sticks around for a few weeks. I wish it lasted just a bit longer. I suppose I don’t have much of a real reason beyond that. I just like it.” He looked up. It was starting to get cloudy, and the sun was just starting to be hidden by a dark barrage of clouds.

“I totally understand! And by the looks of it, it might snow again tonight. I’m actually really excited now!” Sucrose looked up to the sky, a dumb grin plaster across her face. Albedo looked over to the girl. He had a small grin to match, and a bit of pink across his cheeks. He was probably just cold.

“Me too.”

It became harder and harder for Sucrose not to notice such things about him. It was getting harder and harder to handle. She was no fool. She knew exactly what her feelings were and what they entailed, but she felt the need to keep them to herself. She had no business troubling Albedo with such unimportant matters. After all, no matter how close Sucrose had gotten with him, he still felt far away. He was the school’s ace. He had better things to do and keep up with surely. Even still, the fact that he took time out of his day for her gave her a small bit of hope. And she still had the beautifully drawn portrait of her etched into her mind.

“How have your grades been, Sucrose?” By this point, She had just about forgotten the original point of their tutoring sessions. You know. The tutoring part. “I hope I’m not intruding too much by asking…” Sucrose shook her head. It was a reasonable thing to ask, considering these were tutoring sessions.

“They’ve actually improved a lot. It’s all thanks to you really. I think I understand everything a lot better!”

Albedo raised a hand to his chin and appeared to lose himself in thought for a brief moment. Why was Sucrose feeling worried? “Then I suppose you don’t need my assistance anymore, right?” She shot up. It wasn’t a weird thing to ask, but wouldn’t that mean they wouldn’t interact anymore?”

“W-well actually there's still a few things I need help on! It’s all a bit difficult you know…” She desperately spit out a sentence, some odd excuse for him to keep tutoring her.

“Then I’ll keep tutoring you. If you’d like of course.” Sucrose aggressively nodded, causing a bit of surprise and a chuckle from Albedo. “You know, even if I wasn’t tutoring you anymore, I wouldn’t just leave you, you know. Besides, we have winter break coming up next week. I think we’re getting a pretty decent amount of work for it too…” Albedo let out a sigh, seeming to not notice a thing. Sucrose’s heart was going faster than was probably healthy. It felt like it was about to leap out of her chest.

“Mhm.” That's all she could manage. It was so mean of him to scare her like that! But that sudden rush of fear told her something then and there. Something important. She couldn’t keep this going for much longer. “We could always meet up during the break… If it’s so much work, I might need a little help after all... Wait! You don’t have plans right? I wouldn’t be intruding right?” Sucrose, in truth, really wanted to spend time with him outside of a school context. Was that a weird thing to think? No, she told herself. Friends see each other all the time outside of school, right? But it still felt awkward to ask. Tutoring was a better excuse, even if she doubted he would accept her offer.

Albedo looked up, thinking for a second. The sun was fully covered now, and it was a little colder than before. “I don’t have anything major planned. Anything that comes up I could always push aside. It’s not an issue at all.” Sucrose was a little surprised by his answer.

“Are you sure? I’m serious! I don’t want to intrude on your plans!”

“I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it, Sucrose.” She loved the way her name sounded when he said it. “Is there a place you have in mind?”

“Um.. There’s a park near here right? How does that sound? And are you really, really sure? Like, really su-?” She felt a little insecure all the sudden, but she was cut off before it could go on for any longer.

“Sucrose.” That was all it took. “The park sounds fine. How about 7:30? Sunday? It should be dark by then. I’m sure the lights would be pretty.”

“That sounds fine to me…”

When Sucrose got home that day, she threw off her jacket and shoes and ran straight into her room. She took a plunge straight onto her bed. This was really happening right? Of course it was, But why was she so nervous? Who was she kidding. She knew exactly why. It was only for academic help, but it felt much more like a date! Surely he thought the same, right? Or maybe he was extremely dense. She did notice Albedo wasn’t the best at noticing certain things socially. Did he even suspect how she felt? Sucrose doubted it. Sunday was in three days, but it felt like forever away.

Sucrose stumbled up from her bed and into the kitchen. On the counter were her jars of candy, the honey and mint jars still low. It had been awhile since she last made a batch of the two flavors, and she figured now was as good a time as ever. She could always bring them to the ‘meeting.’ Meeting felt too formal. Gathering? Even worse. But the word ‘date’ felt all too wrong! Sucrose had her body on auto-pilot as she baked. Her mind was elsewhere. She was the one making it weird, wasn’t she? In Albedo’s mind it was probably just an outside lunch period tutoring session. Nothing more to it.

“You’re an idiot Sucrose. An idiot! He drew you right? That's gotta mean something!”

“It doesn’t have to mean something.”

“It clearly does in this case!”

“You’re overthinking it.”
Sucrose kept on a conversation with herself throughout the candy process, occasionally interrupting herself to test how the treats were coming along. Sucrose liked concrete answers. It’s why she suffered in english courses. It was all up to interpretation. She wished she had some sort of cheat sheet to all the questions she had. Of course it wasn’t that easy. Questions upon questions swirled in her mind, none of them having an easy answer. Sucrose sighed, separating the newly made candies into their respective jar, though before she was finished, she took a few mint candies aside for herself.

Sucrose trudged back into her room and flopped backwards onto her bed. Popping a candy into her mouth between thoughts, she closed her eyes. ‘Whatever happens, happens.’

✧

All Sunday Sucrose thought about nothing else but their gathering later that evening. Gathering still felt too formal, but it was the best word she landed on. “Whatever happens, happens.” That was easy to say at the time, but the day of? Sucrose knew she was overthinking everything. She giggled to herself, imagining Albedo kicking back wherever he was, no stress about what was to come. The contrast was funny to her.

It was a cold day, and she knew it would be even colder that night. At school she was forced to stick to uniform. She was always a little cold, but she never expressed it since she didn’t want to raise any unnecessary concern. Tonight Sucrose at least got to dress weather appropriate. Come to think of it, Christmas was getting close right? Gosh… The year was moving way too fast. It felt like the beginning of December yesterday.

Sucrose slipped on one sock before looking at the time. 5:30 pm. It was still a little early wasn’t it? That was fine though. She put on her other sock and her shoes. She figured it’d be better to be super early than to be super late. She wouldn’t want Albedo thinking she stood him up or something. She opened the door before stopping for a moment. She stared at the ground, and hand to her chin.

“I’m forgetting something…” She stood there for about thirty seconds before her eyes shot open and she turned to run back inside. The work! She had gotten herself so worked up that she had forgotten the original purpose of them meeting up! She rummaged through her bag, flipping haphazardly through folders and binders until she found what she was looking for. Sucrose started running back out the house, but before she did she stopped in the kitchen to grab some of the candies she made a couple nights prior. And off she went! It was about 6:00 pm now. She couldn’t afford to waste anymore time!

By the time she got there, it was 6:45 pm. She was still there way earlier than they had planned. Sucrose checked the time and sighed. It couldn’t be helped. She went to sit on a park bench. The sun was nearly set. It was almost fully dark out. There was a rather large Christmas tree in the center of the park, strewn with lights and oversized ornaments. Each of the lamp poles were wrapped in and connected by golden white lights. Sucrose looked forward to seeing it all while it was dark out. Suddenly, she felt a familiar hand on her shoulder.

“Sucrose?”

Sucrose just about screamed. She jumped up from the bench but when she turned around it was exactly who she expected it to be. Albedo put his hands up in front of him. “A-ah! I’m sorry… I should’ve announced myself.” He looked away and put a hand behind his head, lightly scratching at his scalp. “I thought I was being good by getting here early, but you beat me to it.” He sat down beside where Sucrose was sitting beforehand. Sucrose quickly sat down next to him, her hands still shaking a bit. “Are you alright?”

It was mostly her nerves, though getting scared like that didn’t help. “Oh! I’m good. You just startled me.” Sucrose put her hands in the pockets of her jacket. “Plus it’s a little chilly.”

Albedo chuckled a bit. “I got you that bad? Sorry about that.

“Nonononono it’s ok! Actually, on a more important note, look what I brought!” Sucrose rummaged through her bag for a few seconds before pulling out a large bag of the honey and mint candies. “I finally made some more! And they came out pretty alright!” Sucrose had a large grin painted on her face. “Would you like some?”

Albedo thought for a second. “As tempting as they are, don’t you think we should eat a proper meal first? Given how you are, I figured you didn’t get the chance to eat anything substantial before you got here so…” He went through his own bag. He pulled out a plastic box and handed it to Sucrose, then he pulled a second one out for himself. “Here. I don’t think we ever really discussed our preferred food items, so I hope this will do.” Sucrose opened the box only to be bombarded by the overwhelming smell of the food inside. A bit of grilled fish with a variety of steamed vegetables. I looked really good.

“You made this? This looks amazing Albedo!”

Albedo rubbed the back of his head, a slight dusting of pink on his cheeks. “Thank you. I hope it tastes amazing too... I haven’t actually tried it yet.” Sucrose took a bite of the food and Albedo could’ve sworn her eyes lit up. “So?”

“This is really good! I didn’t know you could cook!” Sucrose talked in between bites. She was hungrier than she realized.

“I’ve always thought of myself as a pretty average chef. I’m glad it’s good though.” Sucrose hummed as she ate. Albedo grinned and started on his own food. They talked to each other in between bites, though after a bit of conversation, they fell silent. They both caught themselves admiring the scene laid out in front of them. The sky was pitch black, but it was nowhere near dark. The golden lights that earlier had only acted as a nice accent were now the main piece, illuminating the park. The large tree in the center of the park had lit and it all felt too perfect. It felt like a scene out of a cheesy Christmas movie. Crap. How long was she quiet? Too long probably. Sucrose desperately scrambled in her head for something to say, but when she took a quick glance back to Albedo, her thoughts froze. She felt the heat in her face rise, and she figured now would be a better time than ever. If it went bad, and she lost everything, at least she could say she tried.

Sucrose opened her mouth to speak but before she could make a sound, Albedo broke the heavy silence looming over them both. “The air feels nice tonight.”

Sucrose didn’t feel like making small talk anymore.

“Albedo, what do you think of me?”

He looked a little puzzled by the question. “You’re… You’re very smart. I enjoy tutoring you.” Sucrose wasn’t satisfied by that answer. ‘Don’t play dumb! Reject me!’

“What do you really think?”

“It’s exactly as I said.” Albedo turned away from her, a hand to his chin. Was this his way of rejecting her? Sucrose’s heart was going way faster than before, if that was even possible. But she remembered how straightforward he was. If he wanted to reject her, he’d state it plainly, right? “I don’t like you that way.” or “Let’s just be friends.” Not whatever this was, right? Sucrose never wanted something to be true more in her life.

“Let’s take a walk. My legs are feeling stiff.” Sucrose stood up, stretching her arms out. She slung her bag over her shoulders and turned to Albedo. “We should appreciate the lights.”

Albedo nodded. His expression was impossible to read. The same one he had when Sucrose called his eyes pretty. Ugh. Why did she have to say that? The pair took time to stroll around the park, admiring every little detail. The way the melted snow left dew drops on the grass, and the way those drops reflected the golden white light surrounding them at every corner. Sucrose found Albedo incredibly pretty just then. His eyes had a certain sparkle to them. She could get lost in them. They walked in silence for the most part, neither quite sure what was appropriate to say. They both stopped in front of the tree, not too close to go blind, but not too far as to not appreciate the smaller details. That heavy silence from earlier had returned. It was easy to break silence at school. They could always bring it back to school. But for some reason, despite the reason they met here in the first place, neither party was able to find something to say to each other. Sucrose had many things she wanted to say, but how was she to start? Albedo looked to Sucrose and figured it was his job to break the silence once more.

“You know, this whole scene, it’s all very beautiful. I might have to draw it when I return home. It started to snow, but Sucrose didn’t care about that. It was pretty, sure, but there was something, someone, way more gorgeous right in front of her. Sucrose really, really couldn’t take this anymore. She had held her feelings in for so long. She clenched her hands into fists by her side and started to shake. Albedo turned to her after getting no response and quickly took notice. “Sucrose? Are you alrigh-” But she cut him off.

Sucrose buried her head in his chest, grasping desperately at his coat. She couldn’t see anything, but she felt him jolt. She figured he had that very same, ever so frustrating unreadable expression once again. She was shaking and on the verge of tears. ‘I look like an idiot. I feel like an idiot.’ After his initial shock, Albedo awkwardly wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into an embrace. “Albedo… You’re so smart! The smartest guy I’ve ever met! But you can’t read people at all! You’re so dense, it’s frustrating! It’s embarrassing for me to say it plainly...Do I really have to state this so bluntly?” The next five seconds were filled with dead, cold silence. Sucrose smiled to herself. She finally did it. She ruined everything, but she did it.

“No.”

Before Sucrose could process anything, Albedo had his hands on her face, pulling her into a kiss. She kept her eyes closed. It felt so perfect. He was so perfect. She always figured as such, but his lips were soft. It was truly magical. The snow fell around them, and the lights felt so blinding, but neither of them could see it then. Neither of them cared. Though it only lasted a few seconds, Sucrose wished it could’ve lasted forever. Albedo pulled away, slowly opening his eyes. Sucrose let go of the desperate grasp she had on his coat and stepped back.

“I’m such an idiot. I should’ve noticed sooner I-” Sucrose put a finger to his lip. Her eyes were spilling tears. Albedo knew to stop then.

“I really like you, Albedo.” It felt a lot easier to say now, knowing he felt the same.

If not for the lights, neither of them would’ve been able to see how the other looked then. Albedo was smiling, his face flush and his eyes sparkling. How dare Sucrose compare them to mint. They were a lot prettier than that. Sucrose was smiling too, tears streaming down her face. She felt all the weight she’d been carrying slip off her shoulders. Albedo leaned in to kiss her forehead. “I like you too.”

“Do you know how happy that makes me to hear? I’ve held this in for so long…” Her voice was cracking.

“I think I do. Sucrose. I want you to know how happy to make me.” Sucrose looked up at him with a questioning look. “I’m sure you’ve noticed. I’m not exactly popular. I never really wanted to be of course. People are...hard to keep up with. I’m not exactly the best at telling what people are feeling either.” Albedo chuckled with that line. “Nobody has ever really tried to get all that close, but you were different, Sucrose. You were always so pleasant to me. I don’t think I ever properly expressed how much I appreciated it.”

“Albedo…”

He paused for a second and really looked at her. “Did I ever tell you how pretty you were? Ah.. I suppose not...What a shame.”

Sucrose had no idea what to say to that. Did he really think of her that way? Well, he did draw her that once, but did he really think she was that pretty? She started to tear up again. Albedo chuckled. “I have a feeling I should stop. I don’t want to see you cry anymore.” He wiped a tear from her face with his thumb. Sucrose enjoyed his touch all too much. She feared she’d get addicted.

Sucrose wiped her eyes. She really felt like an idiot, but that was fine. That was just the cost. But where would she go from here? She had to say something, right? “I um..I still have these candies. If you’d like some! And there’s plenty of honey!”

Albedo still had a dumb grin on his face. “Gladly. And Sucrose, if you’d be so kind, please allow me to use you as reference one day...”

Sucrose didn’t want to spoil the moment. She’d tell him what she saw some other day. For now she wanted to enjoy every second of this. And as for the winter break homework, it seems they both forgot. “That sounds great!”