Chapter Text
Despite what everyone says, death can be beautiful.
That is what Harry thought as he stood in the middle of what appeared to be Kings Cross station. Everything was white and had light reflecting off of it to create a beautiful shimmer; It was marvellous.
The sight was so beautiful he could almost forget that he had died. Almost.
Harry was surprised to see Dumbledore waiting patiently for him a few feet away, smiling gently at him. Dumbledore looked as if he blended in perfectly, his robes were a beautiful shade of blue and shimmered just like everything around him. His long white beard was perfectly groomed and he had regained his air of mystery and superiority that he had been losing slowly over the years.
“Professor Dumbledore? Is this real.” Harry asked still awestruck by his surroundings.
It was a statement more than a question but Dumbledore just shook his head and smiled gently.
“It's up to you whether you choose to believe it. Maybe it's a dream after all- I am supposed to be dead, aren't I?...
“Professor am I dead, or dying at least? Did I kill Voldemort?” Harry said, his voice taking on a hopeful tone. Voldemort had to be dead. He had to.
Dumbledore looked thoughtful for a second, his eyes twinkle as he comes to some sort of conclusion.
“You are not dead, but you are not quite alive either. You exist in the in-between, the space occupied by those who have not decided yet. You could decide to go back if you wanted to.”
Harry was intrigued but he knew Dumbledore would not explain himself. Dumbledore always did love being cryptic and surely there was no way for Harry to return to the land of the living, he had been hit with the killing curse after all. There was no one lucky enough to survive the curse twice; not even the boy who lived.
“Come along now Mr. Potter, let us take a walk.”
The silence between them felt heavy, but every step felt like they were walking on a cloud.
“About Voldemort, you could go back and see for yourself if you would like. Would you like that Harry?”
The subtle shift in his tone of voice made Harry stop. It was much too serious, much less human.
“You aren’t Dumbledore are you?”
The figure smiled, but the way it looked on Dumbledores form made Harry feel sick.
“Always a smart one you were Harry. Very smart indeed.”
The beings voice was no longer one like Dumbledore instead shifting to a rough voice that sounded like it had swallowed rocks. This new voice didn’t match Dumbledore at all Harry decided. His posture straightened as he got into a fighting position sliding his foot back and pulling out his wand, however, the figure laughed and Harry felt a violent shiver go down his spine.
“I do apologize for deceiving you Mr. Potter, however, I am afraid my real appearance is unsightly and I felt this form might make you more... comfortable.”
Harry didn’t move from his defensive position.
“You can relax now Mr. Potter. You are in a place now where no one can hurt you, you are no longer living after all.”
“I’m not dead either though so I’m afraid I am not going to take any chances,” he snarked back without much bite.
The figure laughed however it was much more sincere sounding.
“I must admit it is rather insulting to me to have the one who wielded all of the deathly hallows in my presence and being unable to claim your soul.”
Death. He was talking to death. He was already suspicious but that comment confirmed it for him. Harry felt himself relax. Even if he wanted to there was no way to fight death.
“I’m surprised you haven’t hexed me yet considering my entire existence is pretty much a slap in your face.”
“I cannot say I haven’t considered young Potter, however, I have much more important matters to discuss with you and I am afraid we are running out of time.”
Death had an air of mystery surrounding it, it had a calming presence and Harry wasn’t sure if that scared him more or less. He took a seat on a nearby bench and death sat next to him.
“You said I could go back but is that possible? Should I even go back?” Harry asked, already certain he knew the answer.
Death looked at a train that had passed by them.
“You could go back, whether or not you should is up to you, however... you are here because you feel unready to die, isn’t that... correct?”
Harry sighed deeply burying his head in his hands.
“It’s not like I’m afraid of dying or anything, but I just- I can’t leave unless I’m sure Voldemort is also dead. I can’t leave the world like that.”
Death was silent.
“Is he dead?”
Death stared into Harry's eyes. They mirrored Dumbledores but they looked... off. There was no longer the twinkle that Harry had found reassuring, instead, they were dull. Its eyes were switching between colours as if it was trying to find the perfect one to lure you into a false sense of comfort. No matter what shade it landed on the eyes had an unfocused milky texture over them. It was terrifying, but Harry couldn’t look away.
“What would you do if I said yes?”
“Then there would be no reason for me to head back.”
“Your friends?” Death asked quizzically.
“They would move on, they have people who will keep them safe and supported.”
Death hummed in acknowledgment.
He seemed to be considering something but Harry hadn’t a clue what.
After a long silence Death spoke up.
“Neville Longbottom will kill Voldemort. Your friends will be safe but the casualties will be high.”
“Oh,” was all Harry managed to say.
The air felt heavy in Harry's lungs. They won. His death would mean something. However, his curiosity reared its head and he couldn’t help asking.
“Who died?”
Death looked at him, analyzing his face.
“You are a strange one, Mr. Potter. Are you sure you would like to know? Once you know I cannot take this knowledge away from you.”
“I’m sure, I want to know who I’ll be seeing soon.”
Harry was resigned to his choice.
“Fred Weasley, Lavender Brown, Colin Creevey, Nymphadora Tonks, Remus Lupin, shall I go on?” Death questioned seeing Harry grow pale.
“no, no I’ve heard enough thanks,” He choked out.
Tanks and Remus, Teddy would grow up an orphan and Harry wouldn’t be there for him. He was supposed to be his godfather, he was trusted to take care of Teddy.
“I apologize for interrupting your guilty thoughts however I do have a proposal for you.”
Harry looked death in the eyes and saw nothing but the shimmer reflected from the lights around them.
“I will let you return to the summer before you turned eleven and you can have a second chance to save everyone.”
Harry shot to his feet and grabbed Death by the shoulders, they felt cold and boney. If he was offended by this action Death did not show it.
“Really? How is that even possible?”
“Yes really, I can send you back. I cannot reveal how since this is a power I seldom use and cannot risk others finding out.”
Harry nodded in understanding. His brain was moving rapidly trying to catch up with what has happened in this conversation thus far.
He can go back! He can start over and save everyone, not just the ones who died during the war! Cedric, Snape, Dobby, all of them! He’s not stupid enough to refuse this offer, however, there was one thing bothering him.
“Why are you giving me this offer? Shouldn’t you be on Voldemort’s side?”
“Why is that?”
“He’s killing people? Shouldn’t you encourage death considering you’re... death?”
Death chuckles.
“It matters not to me when people die, for they cannot escape death and will always come to me eventually.”
The silence is heavy.
“As for the offer, I cannot tell you my reasons as that would defeat the purpose.”
Harry didn’t like that answer, and he didn’t like the excitement in Death’s eyes, however, he isn’t really in any position to oppose. It is the deal of a lifetime.
“I’m afraid our time is almost up so I must ask you to make your choice Mr. Potter. Will you go back to the world full of the unknown, change the world you have already lived, or will you accept your death? Choose.”
He didn’t have time to think, but that's fine, Harry didn’t need the time. He knew what he was going to do. He was no longer needed in his world, sure his friends would mourn him and he would miss them terribly and he never did tell Ginny how he truly felt, he would never get the chance to now. He wouldn’t get to see Hermione and Ron, well I guess he would but it wouldn’t be the same. They could never be the same. Harry knew this very well but he knew what he would do.
He wasn’t ready to die, he still had much to do.
His eyes spelt determination as he looked at death and announced his decision.
“I want to go back to before I started Hogwarts.”
“Understood. Good luck Mr. Potter.”
Death snapped his fingers before Harry had a chance to doubt his decision.
Before he could blink the scene changed and Harry found himself in a familiar sight. He recognized the smell of cobwebs and the scratchy feeling of these old sheets.
He was in the cupboard under the stairs, and Dudley was stomping on them to wake Harry up.
He was in the past.