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Lily is certain she has travelled backwards in the time stream again.
Scarra's paper about soulmate loss is sitting in her hand about three months after it has been written. Scarra's soulmate paper. The very same paper Scarra has talked to her about in her previous lives. In Scarra's future lives. Scarra had thought she had accidentally killed Michael in this life. But no. She knows now Scarra is very wrong about that.
Lily had thought it was a one-time thing. Just a glitch in the system that people still don't understand. But no. Going back to a timeline only to discover that your soulmate was partially responsible for creating an army that made people live in fear wasn't enough. The one time Michael tries to do good… It just never ends well, does it?
Michael… Lily thought Michael knew. But no. Michael is staring at her, expecting some great response to the fact that they're here to see Scarra be a psychology expert for the second time. For the second time, as if they're not witnessing an event that is supposed to be far in their past. But then again, there's no reason in the world why Lily and Michael should be the unique ones.
Lily thinks back on what happened in the life with the ruler Disguised Toast. They toppled the old king and replaced him with Toast, along with Michael and Aphex. And then Lily watched history happen. The corruption of the guards. The guards that no one loved more than Michael did. He loved them so much that he refused to leave their side when they were in danger. He loved them so much that he didn't allow Lily to save him from the death Lily knew was happening that night.
"So, what do you think?" Michael asks. "Pretty cool, huh?"
"It's… interesting," Lily says.
She doesn't know what else to say.
~~~~~
Lily decides not to call Scarra's number.
Scarra would be interested if Lily wants to tell Scarra her story. Lily knows this. But Lily remembers the countless debates she's shared with Scarra over the events of this life. Lily is certain Scarra doesn't know, which means Lily shouldn't tell him. At least, that's what she thinks should happen. Of course, going that route the last time this happened…
Of course Lily had heard the whispers of the people under Toast's kingdom. They were the same whispers Lily has been hearing in her other lives, except the whispers in that moment were devoid of hope. And when Lily realized they were talking in the moment, she realized she knew how the story was going to end. Maybe Lily should have tried to change the story. Maybe Lily should have...
No. Lily can't change the past. Well, her past, anyways. She needs to figure out what to do now. Stay in the moment. She's back in the past again with apparently a clueless Michael. That's fine. Lily can work with that. She has time to figure things out. She has time to plan her next move. Which she needs, because Michael has always been better at planning things out. He sticks with a plan and follows it through, and then learns from his mistakes. He's done it so many times that Lily hasn't had to do so often. Her market was an exception.
Really, Lily was basing her market hierarchy based on the flaws she heard from how Toast's kingdom was run. The very same kingdom that Michael was helping to run and Lily never saw for herself until her market strategies were already established. It was a strange revelation, figuring out that the model for her business was based on something that hadn't happened yet. And then Lily got to see for herself the rise and fall of everything.
At least nothing bad is supposed to happen in this life.
~~~~~
Lily runs into Valkyrae by chance.
She's traveling with Michael to pick up some type of electronics. She's not sure exactly what. But she talks with Michael as they exit the shop, machine parts in hand. And a woman walks by as Michael affectionately calls Lily "my Lilypichu." And she watches as Lily goggles at Michael to shut up.
"Oh my god, Lily?" the woman says. "Michael?"
The woman doesn't even give either of them time to respond. She just excitedly tells them how good it is to see them again before she introduces herself as Valkyrae. God, when's the last time Lily has seen Valkyrae? Three lifetimes ago, Lily thinks. The place with scattered worlds. Most of them peaceful, some not. The only excitement Lily saw in that life was hearing far-off whispers of a cursed place called L'Manburg. But that's in the future. It's better not to reminisce with Rae about that.
But of course, Michael decides to talk about previous lives. He mentions every place he's seen Rae and Rae stands there confused. It's a lot of places. As soon as Michael starts talking about the peaceful empire where they lived with the huge group of people, Lily sees the change in Rae's face. Lily probably would have been confused by the change of expression if she didn't know her own timeline was in shambles.
Afterwards, Rae talks about her life as a psychologist sharing an office with Scarra. Huh. Lily hadn't known that detail. Rae never talked about it in her future lives. The highlight of talking about this life has been Scarra's discoveries. Perhaps Rae had figured Scarra's discoveries contributed more to society than hers had.
"So you're a psychologist along with Scarra this time?" Michael asks. "Sounds exciting."
Rae stares at Michael for a while. Lily is concerned. Rae usually isn't speechless like this. Rae's probably wondering what's wrong with Michael. Probably using her psychology training to come up with some type of diagnosis. Wait. Rae's a psychologist too. She might have some insight on what to do.
"Sweetie," Lily says. "Can you take the stuff to our car? My arms are getting tired and I want to talk with Rae some more."
"Sure honey," Michael says.
He kisses Lily on the cheek before taking all of the stuff and heading to the car. Oh Michael, that sweet, lovable idiot. Michael probably never noticed Rae's confusion. He's always been better at reading machines than people. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but right now, human interaction is the skill to have. But Michael tries, and really, that's all that matters. He tries and fails, and Lily's there to guide him. Most of the time. Lily tries not to think about the exceptions.
With Michael gone, Lily explains her observations to Rae. She starts with explaining Toast's kingdom, and how Lily realized she's heard how the story ended before it happened. And then she explains reading Scarra's paper and realizing she's heard it references in lives she has already experienced. And she talks about how Michael clearly has no idea they've travelled back in time.
Rae, naturally, does not believe Lily. Everyone always moves forward in the time stream. Everyone knows that. It's the one solid fact everyone knows about the mystery of the universe. And yet, Lily and Michael have somehow defied this fact. And Lily gets Rae's skepticism. She really does. But Lily needs someone on her side. So she doesn't give up on persuading Rae.
"I'm telling you Rae," Lily says. "Scarra publishes that paper after talking to Toast. And then Sykkuno comes in and both he and Corpse explain their side of the story. And then the paper attracts the attention of someone named Chilled Chaos, who comes in for scans with Scarra. And then they eventually find his soulmate Ze Royal Viking, which leads to them discovering that there's a part of the brain that's activated due to not meeting your soulmate. And that's what Scarra's known for in many lifetimes after this one."
"I have never heard of Chilled Chaos in my life," Rae says. "And I know the people Scarra works with."
"Then you haven't met Chilled yet," Lily says. "Trust me, he will be there."
The two depart after exchanging contact information. Time shenanigans aside, Lily does want to spend more time with Rae. And perhaps their friendship will grow stronger when Rae realizes Lily isn't crazy. Unfortunately, Lily doesn't know exactly when Chilled Chaos arrives. But she knows it will happen.
Lily meets Michael at the car. They go home and Michael immediately starts fiddling with the robot parts. He'll probably spend hours on them. Lily doesn't mind the time alone. It gives her time to think before the date Michael has promised her tonight. Lily thinks about how nice it would be to be able to talk to someone about all this time stuff. Someone who believes her. There's so much to talk about, to unpack.
Lily hopes Chilled won't take too long.
~~~~~
Turns out, Chilled kept Lily waiting for only a week.
During that week, Rae has been talking about other things with Lily. They've been hanging out and enjoying each other's company and the world around them. It's always good to enjoy the peaceful lives. Danger and war are never fun. But for now, in this life, most people aren't worried about life. So when Rae's greeting on the phone is different than normal, Lily doesn't process why at first.
"How did you know?" Rae says when Lily picks up the phone.
"Huh?" Lily says.
"Literally today, someone responded to Scarra's paper," Rae says. "And his name is Chilled Chaos. How did you predict that?"
From there, it's a lot easier to convince Rae of Lily's predicament. Knowing something like this isn't a lucky guess, and both Lily and Rae know that. Lily's claim also explains Michael's recollections of places Rae hasn't heard of yet. And so the two talk it out. Rae listens to Lily's story again, this time taking note of the things Rae now knows to be true.
"I don't know why this is happening," Lily says. "I don't get why Michael and I are the ones who are breaking the universe."
"I could try and find out," Rae says. "Do some investigation. A little research."
"Are you really going to psychoanalyze me to figure this out?" Lily asks.
"I am definitely scanning your brain," Rae says. "Not doing so would be such a waste. If nothing else, I'll have another sample of a brain to compare patients' brains to."
Lily couldn't argue with that.
~~~~~
The brain scans reveal nothing at first.
It isn't until Rae sees Scarra's scans of Chilled's brain that Rae notices a difference between Lily's brain and everyone else's. There's brain activity near the spot enhanced in Chilled's brain, but it's a different area. Rae explains her findings so rapidly and with so much jargon that Lily can't make sense of it. But there's something going on, and Rae is definitely excited about it.
Rae and Lily end up convincing Michael to get his brain scanned, under the guise of explaining how the brain scan machines in the lab work. The both of them have agreed not to tell Michael about the time travel thing, deciding to let Michael figure it out on his own. Rae is thrilled to find the same abnormality in Michael's brain.
Rae writes her own paper. She keeps a full journal full of her discoveries about Lily. She writes down every future world Lily tells her about. But Rae decides not to publish this. This is for Rae and Lily only. There's no historical evidence for Rae to include. The phenomenon is unique to Lily and Michael as far as both of them can tell. And the universe isn't ready for predictions of the future that will blow their minds.
Rae doesn't mind not getting publicity for this. She's content with Scarra being the star of the show. Her assistant Corpse Husband has been more invested in Scarra's soulmate project than Rae's sporadic tendencies, so hiding Lily and her situation from Corpse isn't hard. When Rae explains this all to Lily, Lily understands. This is their secret. Lily has her person to vent to. Rae has an inspiration that keeps her going.
Lily is content with that.
~~~~~
Lily cherises the peaceful moments she has with Michael.
Being with Rae is amazing, but it also reminds Lily of her reality. Spending time with Michael is a breath of fresh air. There's nothing to worry about. It's just Lily and the love of her life, the one person she won't trade for anything. Even when he pulls his pranks or isn't the nicest to people, he is always soft with her. And that makes Lily more happy than anything else.
Lily is content when she gets to watch Michael mess around with the robotics he adores so much. Robotics don't exist in every world. Perhaps if they did, Michael could have kept tabs on all the sorcerers under him instead of relying on blind trust. Maybe Michael never would have taken on such a responsibility in the first place. Michael could have built a better security system so that he wouldn't have died.
But Michael's past worrying about that life now. Lily had to explain what happened during the lifetime they'd experienced afterwards, but it didn't take Michael very long to get over it. Lily knows the only reason she's hung up over it is because she knew it was going to happen and made false assumptions about Michael knowing too. And dealing with the fact that Lily is unwillingly travelling in time is bad enough. But add in what happened in the sorcerer world as well, and...
But those are the thoughts Lily has when she's with Rae or when she's alone. When she's in Michael's presence, the present is all that matters. Being with Michael in a peaceful world… there are no words to describe this feeling. It's bliss, it's calming, it's joy, it's adoration, it's peace. It's paradise, and Lily wants it all. She never wants it to end.
Lily doesn't want to think about when this will end.
~~~~~
While talking with Rae, Lily learns about the original life for the first time.
The original life. The very first world people have lived in. They called it Earth, apparently. It was large and full of both peace and war at the same time. Things changed on Earth. Gradually, of course, but they changed. When Rae mentions it in conversation about theories of Lily's travels, Lily has one response.
"Earth?" Lily says. "What's that?"
"It's Earth," Rae says. "What do you mean, what's Earth?"
"I've never heard of Earth before," Lily says.
"You haven't heard of Earth?" Rae asks. "Lily, everyone knows what Earth is."
"I don't," Lily says.
Earth, apparently, is the original world. The first life for everyone. No one forgets their first life, except for the moments of childhood when past memories haven't developed yet. Everyone's first life is special. It's when you've met your soulmate for the first time. It's where you develop your interests, personality, mentality. That first life becomes the core of your being. Except Lily's first life never had a Earth.
"Everyone has lived a life on Earth," Rae says.
"I haven't," Lily says.
Rae looks at Lily. Stares at Lily. Lily stares back. Lily knows her truth.
"Everyone has lived a life on Earth," Rae says.
"Everyone travels forward in the time stream," Lily says.
Rae wisely drops the subject.
~~~~~
Lily needs a plan for the future.
Rae agrees when Lily tells her this. They need a plan for if or when Michael finds out about the time shenanigans going on. They need a plan for future lives, especially the ones where Lily and Michael will travel back in time again. It's better to make plans when everything is peaceful.
After much debate, Rae and Lily make their first plan. It's for when Lily travels back to the future. Plans are important, but the opportunity to make future plans is most important, so they decide to make a code word for when Lily has lived this life. Something that Rae will recognize.
"The code word is babushka," Rae says.
"Babushka?" Lily asks.
"It means grandma in one of the old ancient languages," Rae says. "It's far out there, and it's not something you'd say in any other context. It's perfect."
Lily doesn't have a plan for everything, but at least she has babushka.