Chapter Text
They were five minutes on the road when Clyde said, “wait! I forgot my contact solution!” and they had to turn around. It was unsurprising that Clyde forgot something. It was so unsurprising from the group that instead of blaming Clyde, they blamed Craig.
“I’m not his keeper!” Craig argued.
“If y-y-you aren’t, then why does h-he have your name on his ass cheek?”
“First of all, it’s his initials,” Clyde interjected. “Second of all… actually that’s all I have.”
“He lost a dumb bet to Token, and I didn’t even consent to it.”
Token snorted from behind the driver’s wheel.
“A-and what was the bet?”
“You know damn well what it was,” Craig grumbled, crossing his hands over his chest.
“Token said I couldn’t go a day without texting Craig, but in my defense, it was a moment of weakness, and I forgot that I committed to it for the day.”
Craig huffed and rolled his eyes. “He’s also getting it removed.”
“Hell no I’m not! That shit would hurt. Havent I already suffered enough?”
“Isn’t it kind of g-gay to have your bro’s i-in-in-intials on your ass?”
Another snort came from Token, along with a sigh from Craig.
“I tell chicks that it’s my dead grandmother’s initials, and I get a lot of sympathy.”
“Aren’t both your grandmothers alive?” Token asked.
“Yeah? They don’t know that.”
“Dude, y-you are f-f-fucked up.”
“Well, they are a lot less likely to run into one of my alive grandmas than Craig! Otherwise, I’d just say he died!”
Craig glared at his friend in the backseat. Clyde just gave him a sheepish smile and a wink. Craig shook his head and turned away. His irritation was already maxed out by this trip, and it had barely even started. He had no idea how he was going to make it through the next few days.
As they left South Park, and out through the empty and open roads beyond their small town, Craig stared out the window. He watched the open farmland pass by them, covered in a sheet of snow and a couple of cows.
The car-ride was long and brutal. After what seemed like forever, just faced with open land, they reached the highway. Clyde was the first to ask Token to stop, needing to “let out a leak.”
Craig begged Token to let him drive, just to get out of the backseat and away from Clyde’s constant poking. He kept asking his opinions of girls on Tinder, as if he wasn’t an extremely gay man. Every single girl Craig said seemed nice, Clyde swiped left on. Clearly, he did not value his opinion.
Token allowed him to drive, taking the passenger seat and sending Jimmy to the backseat instead. According to the GPS, they had two hours to go.
Those two hours consisted of them fighting over who would be rooming with Jimmy. Clyde snored rather loudly, Token used some white noise machine to fall asleep and Craig occasionally talked in his sleep.
Jimmy asked them to perform in a joke-off which Craig immediately removed himself from, having no effort or desire to even try in the ridiculous competition. Jimmy ended up choosing Token as the winner, and Craig swore he only did because a white noise machine was better than the sound of snoring.
After one more bathroom break and a trip to McDonalds, they finally arrived at the lodge. His friends immediately piled out of the car, running to the door, ditching their belongings behind. Craig was not planning on a second trip outside though, so he gathered his bags before he headed inside.
The lodge was equipped with high ceilings and large windows; the snowy Rocky Mountain scenery in front of them. The large windows casted natural light on the living space and the open-floor plan kitchen. The wood panel walls were decorated with winter escapade paintings and photographs of the Rocky Mountains.
He and his friends were staying on the bottom level of the lodge, so he made his way past the open-floor kitchen and into the hallway. He checked out the two rooms before deciding on the slightly bigger one. If he was going to share a room with Clyde for four nights, he was going to need all the space he could get.
Like the living space and kitchen, the windows were wide and tall, surrounded by wood panels and decorative photographs.
Craig dropped his bag by the wooden dresser and afterward, collapsed onto the quilted bed. He laid his head on the pillow and stared at the ceiling. He could go for a nap right now, but he knew that wasn’t an option as Clyde erupted through the doorway, dropping his belongings beside the entryway.
“This is sick, dude!” Clyde exclaimed as he strode forward, collapsing on the bed beside Craig.
Clyde laid beside him with his elbows hoisting him up, a dopey smile on his lips. “If I meet a girl, can —,”
“No.”
Clyde frowned. “Come on, Dude! I would let you hook up with a guy here.”
Craig rolled his eyes. “We will talk when you actually meet a girl who doesn’t exist solely on Pornhub.”
“Hey, I get tons of women!” Clyde defended, scrunching up his face. “Maybe the other group who will be staying here will be a ladies group,” he smirked. “That would be awesome.”
Clyde turned and rested his head on the pillow, crossing his arms behind his neck.
“Token said the owner told him it’s another group of guys.”
He received a swat to the shoulder at this. “Well, there you go! Go get some!”
“I doubt any of them are gay.”
“Hm, I guess we’ll just see about that, hmm?” Clyde took his previous position again, eyes on the ceiling.
Craig scoffed at the likelihood. Not only would they have to be gay, but single and appealing. If Craig couldn’t find someone in the real world, he doubted it would happen in this lodge.
Craig didn’t get to rest for long though, because a minute later Token banged on their door, telling them it was time to hit the slopes.
Although Craig was excited to ski, he hoped one of the concession stands would sell some form of caffeine to boost his energy.
***
It was the sixty-fourth time that day that Tweek regretted his decision. Two nights ago, he was high and stupid enough to let his best friend, Kenny, persuade him in to joining him and his friends for a long weekend skiing, far away from South Park. Spending the weekend trapped inside a suspicious looking house – potentially with strangers and Cartman – was the second worst thing that he could imagine. However, it still sounded better than working every day for free in his parents’ coffee shop during the winter break. So, there he was; stuck in the back of the Marsh family’s minivan – with probably the five most reckless and crazy people South Park could offer – inhaling the putrid air filled with farts, the smell of junk food and weed, which Kenny tried to hide from Kyle, with little-to-no success.
“Well, Kial —” Cartman began, intentionally pushing his knee into the back of the passenger seat, where Kyle sat.
“My name is not Kial,” The redhead grumbled angrily, placing the book he was trying to read on his lap.
“Kewl —” the fat man mocked, his uncomfortable smooth lips twisted into a devilish grin and both his blue and brown eyes shimmered with pleasure. Tweek always found it strange just how much Cartman’s blue eye resembled Kenny’s. Sometimes he could swear they looked absolutely identical.
“Goddammit Cartman, it’s Kyle!”
The driver had enough of his two loud friends and annoyedly sped the car up. “He’s clearly trying to get on your nerves, dude,” Stan sighed, desperately longing for those cold beers which rested in the back of the car. Being trapped with his friends in a rolling metal box for over three hours and staying sober were more than his melancholic soul could take.
Tweek let out a tired sigh, wishing he still had some coffee left to take his attention away from the noisy duo’s cat and mouse play. He glanced at Butters who was innocently sleeping next to Cartman, then his eyes shifted over the third blond man, who eagerly watched the scene unfold at the front of the van.
“How can you take this every day?” Tweek sighed, leaning against the cold window while he tried to shut the noises out from the front. He couldn’t wait to finally get out of this death trap and breath in some fresh air.
Light laughter bubbled up from Kenny as his soft eyes landed on him. “Easy,” a sly smile spread on his freckled face as he leaned closer, whispering into Tweek’s ear. “Free entertainment.”
Tweek shook his head in disbelief, but Kenny was still close and his nose bumped into his cheek. “Space,” he muttered, pushing Kenny’s face away jokingly.
“Let’s see how long wasted Tweek can keep his hands away from my godly body.”
A low chuckle escaped Tweek’s pursed lips. “You are still not as sexy as you think,”
“Maybe,” Kenny smirked, “but it doesn’t change the fact that you’re very touchy when you’re drunk.”
“Shut up!”
“Yes, shut the fuck up fags!” Cartman groaned.
“Shut up Cartman!” the other four awake men in the van shouted with an absolutely unplanned synchronicity, and for a brief moment it was silent, before they burst into a fit of laughter.
“Screw you guys!” Cartman whined, his voice rose in pitch before he angrily opened a new bag of crisps.
Surprisingly, they spent the remaining half an hour of the drive in relative peace. Kyle’s green eyes glued to his book, while Cartman kept his mouth busy with food. Stan counted the minutes down until he could finally drink while Tweek silently gazed out the window. Glimmering fresh snow covered everything around them and the ancient pine trees stood threateningly on either side of the road. Eventually Kenny followed the Butter’s example and fell asleep, leaning against Tweek’s shoulder.
On the rare occasions that they could actually act like normal humans, those were the moments when Tweek didn’t mind that much being friends with them.
“There’s a car already parked here,” Cartman stated the obvious as they arrived at their destination. He leaned forward, poking his head between Kyle and Stan. His hands were sticky and slightly orange from the bag of cheesy puffs he devoured a few minutes ago. Some of his fingers – clearly on purpose – brushed over the redhead’s grey coat, leaving some greasy fingerprints on it.
“It's not that surprising, since we only booked half of the lodge,” Kyle said in a matter-of-fact tone, seemingly unaware of the fatty stain on his coat.
“Well, if one of us wouldn’t be a greedy jew —”
“Says the one whose mother pa —”
“Enough guys!” Stan grumbled, and switched the engine off. “Let’s just head inside,” he jumped out of the car. The sudden cold air sent shivers down his spine.
Soon enough Cartman and Kyle joined him outside, still sending silent death threats towards each other.
“I hope there will be some fine chicks and not a bunch of guys,” Butters muttered, looking back at Kenny before he opened the door on his side and jumped out from the vehicle.
“I’m fine with either,” Kenny replied with a sly smile.
“Oh right, good for you, Kenny!”
“What can I say, I’m always a winner,” Kenny snickered as he watched Butters pulling the seat forward, to help him and Tweek crawl out from the van too.
By the time Tweek got outside, Kyle, Cartman and Butters had already rushed inside the house, only leaving a suspicious looking Kenny and Stan outside.
It felt like heaven when Tweek could finally stretch his body and fill his lungs with the cold air. His eyes settled on the beautiful, pure patches of virgin snow, feeling guilty for ruining it with his footprints. The fresh snow crunched under his weight as he walked over the back of the car. Stan was already waiting for him, holding Tweek’s backpack in his hand. “Thanks,” he nodded and took his belongings from him.
The smallest smile appeared on Stan’s lips, but as soon as he opened his mouth to say something to Tweek, a quickly approaching object crashed into his pretty face.
“Nice, direct hit!” Kenny cheered, choking on his own laughter as he watched the neatly made snowball fall apart on his friend’s cheek and fall to the ground.”
Stan’s blue eyes darkened and Tweek could see his body tensing up.
“Kenny —!” Stan rumbled as he squatted down and began to gather some snow around him to repay his friend. “We are at war now you, asshole!”
That was the moment when Tweek decided to quickly flee from the scene and head towards the lodge.
It was surprisingly warm and nice inside. It had a welcoming aura and Tweek already knew he would miss this place when they were leaving.
“The two rooms on the ground floor are already occupied, but it looks like the other guests are out somewhere,” Kyle stated as he checked out the fireplace in the living area. “Possibly skiing.”
“So, the upstairs is ours,” Stan hummed as he shuffled inside and looked up. There was an open ceiling above the living area and they could clearly see the four closed doors upstairs. His beloved hat was missing from his head and fat drops of snowy water dripped from his dark hair.
Kenny was nowhere to be seen.
“They did bring some booze,” Butters said as he explored the kitchen. “Mostly beer though,” he sighed and closed the fridge’s door.
“Weak,” Cartman snorted from the couch, while he was busy checking something on his phone.
Tweek was nearly scared to death when unexpectedly, someone blew into his ear behind. He turned around to face Kenny, who had soundlessly sneaked upon him.
A triumphant smile cracked Kenny’s face as he proudly wore Stan’s hat on his head. It suited him surprisingly well.
“We should check out the rooms,” Stan stated, balancing on one leg while he untied the shoelaces on his boot. “You too, Kenny, take off your shoes first,” he didn’t even need to glance up to know what his friend was thinking.
“Aye-aye Captain.”
They all headed upstairs once Kenny was finished with dramatically taking his combat boots off, and dodging Stan’s attempt to get his beanie back.
Stan rolled his eyes and checked out the first room. “This one has a double bed,” he said from inside, before he poked his head out into the hallway.
Butters rushed over the middle one and peaked inside. “It’s a twin room.”
“Same here.” Came Kyle’s voice from the last room.
“I’m not going to share a bed with any of you fags,” Cartman grumbled once all six of them gathered outside the rooms. “or I may catch your gayness.”
“Shut up, fatass, like anyone would want to share with you!” Kyle snapped at him, with glaring green eyes.
Cartman stepped closer to the redhead, his nostrils widened and dark excitement flickered in his mismatched eyes. However, before he even had a chance to say something back, Kenny stepped away from the wall and grabbed Tweek’s free arm with a mischievous smile. “I'm gonna share it with Tweek.”
“Brilliant, the two gaywards,” Cartman snorted, but eased up a bit. “If I hear any of your disgusting moans or other noises —”
“We will keep it quiet. Right, babe?” Kenny snickered, winking at Tweek, who looked back at him with a shocked and disapproving face.
“Oh, god! Why am I even here?!” Cartman cried out theatrically and tossed his bag over to Butters, who quietly watched the usual scene with his pale blue eyes.
“That’s what I want to know too,” Kyle cut in, shooting a daring look towards the chunky brunette.
“Oi!” Cartman looked back at him, ready to fight.
“Guys, can you please just shut the fuck up, and start unpacking?” Stan mumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose. He met Kyle in the eye, and the two had a quick, silent conversation, before the blues eyes settled on Cartman, who, after a dragging second, shrugged his shoulders and gave in to Stan.
Kyle picked up his best friend’s gym bag from the floor and walked over him. “Stans right. Let’s pack out and meet downstairs,” he glanced at the clock on the wall, “in fifteen minutes?”
The blond trio nodded in agreement before they headed towards their rooms, Butters carrying his and Cartman’s belongings too.
“Make it thirty,” The fat brunette chimed in as he turned his back on the unbreakable duo. “I need to take a dump.”
“Uh,” Kyle grimaced in disgust. “Remind me not to use the same bathroom as him.” He turned to Stan, who just tiredly rolled his eyes and took his bag out from the other’s hand.
“Let’s go.”
Tweek’s eyes were wide with amazement as he looked around in the room. It was bigger than his own bedroom and so toasty and welcoming. But before he even had a chance to keep examining his surroundings in peace, Kenny hurriedly passed by him and landed on the bed they shared.
“Holy shit Tweek!” he muttered, nuzzling his face into one of the soft pillows. “This is the most comfortable bed I have ever been on.”
“Even better than Kyle’s super fancy memory foam mattress?”
“Totally,” Kenny let out a muffled chuckle and twisted his head to the side when he felt the mattress sinking next to him. He found himself facing a happily smiling Tweek.
“Thanks, Kenny.”
“For what? Letting you share a bed with me?”
“No,” Tweek shook his head lightly, while he fought back a smile. His blue eyes shimmered with tenderness. “For convincing me to join you.”
“Well, I’m glad you came,” Kenny said and ran his fingers through the strands of Tweek’s slightly lighter blond hair. “Also, thanks to you I needed to pay less for this trip,” he snickered as Tweek brushed his hand off of him.
“Asshole.”
“Guys, we don’t have time for this!” came Kyle’s voice from behind as the redhead peeked inside the room. “Hurry up! We have to make dinner!” he added and moved on.
Kenny sighed and sat up. “He just had to ruin the moment,” he said and winked at Tweek before he crawled off of the bed and began to unpack his old military style backpack. The smell of marijuana immediately spread throughout the room.
“We need to do something about this smell,” Tweek commented, putting his shirts into the wooden wardrobe.
“We will just keep the window slightly open.”
“Like it ever worked,” Tweek rolled his eyes and glanced at Kenny, who looked back at him with a coy smile. “Also, do you think it’d be ok if I go and take a shower? I feel like I smell like Cartman’s fart,” he gave a grimace of disgust.
Kenny burst into a fit of laughter as he watched the other’s adorable face twist. “Sure, babe, I will hold down the front, so Kyle won’t be able to barge in on you,” his smile widened in a wicked way as he continued. “Unless you want me to join you instead?”
“No, thank you,” Tweek grabbed a clean tower from the edge of the bed and fished out the shower gel from his bag. “Just keep Kyle away from the bathroom. I will be quick.”
“I’m not gonna say I’m not disappointed, but the night is still young,”
“Thanks, Kenny!” Tweek chuckled and sneaked out from the room, trying his best not to be noticed by the redhead.
The bathroom was just as breathtaking as every other part of the lodge, even though there were clear signs of Cartman already using the room. Tweek opened the window for a moment to get some fresh air in while he dressed down.
He stepped inside the shower and the warm water felt like a blessing once it hit his tired body.
***
As nightfall came and their stomachs grew hungry for something other than that of concession food, they decided to head back to the lodge.
Craig had spent the evening snow-tubing with Jimmy. Tomorrow, one of their other friends would accompany him instead, and Craig would take on the ski slopes. He and Jimmy did get a good laugh, however, at Clyde’s expense. It had been a few years since he took on the slopes, and the second he had his pair of skis on, he fell over.
Even though it had been fun, Craig was eager to get back to the lodge. He was tired and hungry, therefore irritable. He just wanted to eat and sleep.
“I wonder if the other group will want to hang out tonight,” Clyde said.
Craig rolled his eyes. “I hope not. I’ve had too much human interaction for the day.”
“You say that every day!”
“And I mean it.”
His hope immediately plummeted when he walked through the door. In the kitchen, a familiar group of faces stood; those faces belonging to a group known as “Stan’s gang,” or “the most obnoxious group of people in the world,” as Craig liked to call them.
He watched as his friends lit up in sight of them, greeting them and falling into easy conversation. He stood behind, feeling a headache beginning to form.
He avoided this group of people as much as he could growing up — even though they made it extremely hard to do so —always pulling people into their ridiculous schemes. The worst of them was definitely Eric Cartman, a person who Craig could not understand how anyone could actually be friends with.
When Kyle Broflovski offered them some dinner, he supposed it wasn’t all terrible. He was starving, and the idea of preparing his own meal right now sounded exhausting. Just as he was coming around to the idea of sharing a lodge with this group of people for the next four days, he heard a door click from upstairs.
He darted his eyes up, curious to who else could be here, seeing as all of the usual member’s of Stan’s gang were in the kitchen. He lifted his eyebrows at the sight of the new individual, only wrapped in a towel and his blonde hair wet.
Without thinking, his eyes trailed down the body of the blonde stranger; taking a glimpse of his muscular and lean body. He had the vaguest trace of abs, and a slight v shape that led to his groan.
Craig flushed, realizing what he was doing. As he looked up again, the blonde’s eyes widened and he rushed away.
Craig bowed his head down in shame, shaking his head. He did not normally, unashamedly check someone out like that, but this stranger seemed familiar. That , and he wasn’t used to running into hot blondes, dripping wet and only wearing a towel.
***
Tweek turned off the water and stepped out from the shower. The air was steamy and the mirror above the sink was foggy. A sheepish smile crossed his face as he stepped closer and pushed his index finger against it and wrote “ Cartman likes it balls-deep” all over it. He looked at his job with pure pride in his eyes before he turned away from it and quickly towelled himself. However, soon he realized he made a mistake and forgot to bring clean clothes with himself.
He let out an annoyed moan; there was no way he would put his dirty stinky clothes back. He secured the towel around his waist and stepped outside.
Immediately unidentified voices hit his ears from downstairs. He looked down and saw four strangers mixing with his friends.
At first he didn’t recognize them, but as he watched the scene it became obvious that his friends knew them. The longer his eyes lingered on them, the more he felt a strange sense of familiarity coming from them, and eventually he recognised the dark skinned man. He saw him once when he was waiting for Kenny just outside of South Park High, but that meant that the other four men were from their hometown too. After the realization it made so much more sense why Kyle was calmly chatting with the dark skinned man and while Kenny looked at the unknown brunette with a goofy smile on his lips.
His eyes shifted over them and settled on the fourth man, who stood a bit further away, keeping his distance from everyone. He was tall and gloomy looking, certainly unhappy about the unexpected encounter. Maybe it was fate, or maybe Tweek was too loud, but a second later the loner looked up and their eyes met. The way he looked at him, made Tweek’s heart skip a beat. The man’s eyes moved a little bit lower and Tweek was suddenly aware of how he was standing there only wearing a towel around his waist. He felt his cheeks warming up as he turned around and rushed inside the room. It was the worst possible way to introduce himself. He wasn’t sure if he would ever be able to look into the other man’s eyes again.