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nothing sacred, but it's a living

Summary:

Mermista hates her job. Sea Hawk is just starting. And of course everyone absolutely loves working retail.

or

the seamista grocery store au nobody asked for

Notes:

happy valentines day besties :) if nobody else is your valentine, i hope that me projecting onto sea hawk is

Work Text:

The music in the store was godawful; maybe mid-2000’s pop music was a good choice ten years ago, but in 2021? It just made Mermista roll her eyes (to be fair, though, that wasn’t exactly hard to do.)

She only had about four more hours left in her shift which was the only thing giving her even the smallest semblance of motivation. Sure, she didn’t care much about her job, but she was damn good at it. Grocery store cashiers had it harder than she realized before working, but at least the store she worked at paid decently.

“Hey, Mermista,” one of the managers called out. “Close your register down and come here for a second.” She rolled her eyes. A part of her was happy to not be on register, but she also knew that she might end up going to other departments. It was always a bit stupid to her, having to do other departments’ work for cashier pay. But it did make the time pass faster.

“Ugh, what?” she asked.

“This is Sea Hawk.” He gestured to the guy standing at the customer service counter. He looked about her age, maybe a bit older but it could just be the mustache. “You’re training him for the rest of your shift.”

“Really?” She crossed her arms, resting her hip against the counter.

“It’s his second day, you really just have to bag for him and, like, offer assistance if he needs it.”

“Which I won’t,” Sea Hawk interjected with an almost arrogant grin. “I know exactly what I am doing.”

“Um, okay?” She once again rolled her eyes. “Let’s get this over with.” She walked him over to her register, stopping by the bags and letting him handle, well, everything else.

It wasn’t a particularly busy day, which was expected seeing as it was 6:45pm on a Tuesday. The store honestly wasn’t very busy, with the exception of weekends and senior discount Thursdays, or if the weather looked rather sketchy. Busier days definitely made the time pass faster, but it also was more physically and emotionally draining. Slower days made better training days, at least in her opinion.

“So, like,” she started, “is there anything that you’re, like… not super confident in, or…?”

“Not at all!” Sea Hawk announced, almost too confidently. “I actually feel great.”

“Oh, cool.” Her voice was flat, disinterested.

It was her last shift before she went on educational leave, taking time off while she went back to school. She honestly couldn’t be bothered to do anything and was more than comfortable just letting Sea Hawk handle most of the work by himself.

“So, like… why did you start working here?” she asked, mostly just to cut the incredibly awkward silence.

“I have, after many years together, tragically suffered a loss. The Dragon’s Daughter III, my beloved vessel, has gone up in flames.” He clutched a hand to his chest. “I must raise funds to purchase myself another.”

“Uh huh, can you maybe try that again in actual words? Thanks.”

“My car, named the Dragon’s Daughter III, caught on fire.”

“And what happened to the Dragon’s Daughters I and II?” He mumbled something in response, too quiet for her to hear. “Um, I’m gonna need to get that again.”

“They also caught on fire.”

“Wow!” she said sarcastically. “I can’t wait for you to offer to drive me home from work every day so we can catch on fire together! Your power is truly unmatched.”

“I am, contrary to popular belief, a good driver.”

“Mhmm. Okay. I’ll believe it when I see it.”

“It’s true! You know, I was once the best driver in-”

“Yeah, yeah, we have a customer.” She pointed to a woman with a very full cart that had walked over to their register.

She wasn’t sure if it was his first huge cart he had ever rung up or what, but he seemed incredibly nervous. She understood, though. She had been working there for over three years and still got annoyed whenever a customer had the audacity to buy more than $400 worth of groceries, especially if she had to bag it by herself.

He was moving slower than she thought he would, but she chalked that down to it being his second day on a register. Nobody can go particularly fast for a while after starting.

“Uh, Mermista?” he asked once he got to the large amount of produce. “Could I, perchance, acquire some assistance?”

“God, can you please talk like a normal person?” she said under her breath as she moved closer to see what produce the lady had. She flawlessly called out produce codes for everything he grabbed. It was probably the only thing she was proud of: knowing almost all of the produce codes in the system.

“She’s good,” the lady commented.

“Thanks, I try,” Mermista replied with a smile.

The rest of the order went pretty well. Mermista had expected it would, but it’s always a good sign when new trainees catch on quickly. If the rest of the night went just like that one order did, they would have absolutely nothing to worry about.


The lights flickered, a thunderous roar making Sea Hawk jump with an almost embarrassing yelp. The sound of the rain against the metal roof was deafening. The storm was worse than anyone had anticipated.

“Think we’ll lose power?” he asked nervously, leaning against the counter.

“I doubt it,” Mermista said. “I’ve been here through a tornado before, I think we’ll be fine.”

As if the universe was playing a joke on them, a large bolt of lightning and a thunderclap so loud Sea Hawk’s soul left his body sent the entire shopping center into an eerie darkness.

“Great,” Mermista groaned. “That’s exactly what I needed today.”

“Is… is this bad?”

“Nah, the power will probably be back in a few.”

“Probably?”

Again, the timing was absolutely impeccable, as right as the word left his mouth the lights turned on again.

“My power is truly unmatched,” Sea Hawk said with a grin. “I cannot believe I have the power to- what’s it doing?” He looked over at the register. The screen had gone blue.

“Ugh, it’s rebooting,” Mermista groaned. “So basically this is gonna take, like, five minutes maybe. So if anybody comes up here, we’re closed until it comes back on.”

“Oh! So what should we do until then?”

“Um, if anyone’s register like comes back on okay, we’re supposed to go bag for them, but since nobody’s here, we can just, like… chill, or whatever.”


“Hey, can I give you some change for a dollar?” a man asked, his words slurring.

Mermista stared at him for a second before replying. “Sure.” The man handed her a wad of change, and the look on her face said everything. She winced and shuddered as she set the coins down on the counter. Sea Hawk tried to help her count it, but the second he touched a coin he knew exactly why Mermista reacted the way she did.

The coins were wet. Not damp, like he was holding them in sweaty hands. Wet. They were sopping fucking wet, as if he had stuck his hands in a fountain and pulled out several handfuls of coins. Sea Hawk almost gagged.

“Ten, twenty, thirty,” Mermista mumbled, quietly counting dimes with eyes wider than the moon. She added the coins up and handed the man a dollar.

“You have done a great service to a scholar on this lovely night. Enjoy your evening,” the man slurred before leaving.

Mermista silently watched him until he left the store, and she gagged. “Why were the coins wet? Why were they so fucking wet?” she asked almost hysterically. Sea Hawk couldn’t even speak; he pointed towards the bathroom and full on sprinted towards it, washing his hands so thoroughly one would think he was avoiding a plague.

Mermista joined him a moment later. “No, no, no,” she mumbled to herself as she scrubbed at her hands until they turned red.

“That was- I can’t- why was- what?” Sea Hawk eventually spat out.

“That ruined my night, possibly the rest of my week, probably the rest of my life,” Mermista said, letting out a small laugh. “I have never had that happen before and I never want it to happen again.”

A small smile rested on Sea Hawk’s face as he stared at her for a moment. “We should go wipe down the counter,” he said after another second.

“What we should do is throw the whole counter in the garbage and light it on fire.” She shuddered as she stared back at her hands, and washed them one more time.

“Does that happen a lot?” he asked.

“No. Never. And if it ever happens again, I’m quitting on the spot.”

“I wouldn’t blame you,” he chuckled. “I, for one, would not be here if not for the death of my beloved-”

“Dragon’s Daughter whatever. I know.”

If Sea Hawk was anything, he was so obnoxious. He never stopped talking in what Mermista could only call 1300’s speak. It was like half the time she had absolutely no clue what he was on about. And yet, there was something about him…

“We should probably get back to our register,” she said, much softer. She walked out of the bathroom without another word.


Four hours had never been slower in as long as Mermista had lived. Every time she felt she had a productive hour of work, only five minutes had passed. It was infuriating.

The time was still passing, however, and eventually her time to leave rolled around. She showed Sea Hawk how to clean the registers, making sure to wipe it down. She was always sure to clean it thoroughly, but that was mostly just so she could get some more time on the clock without really working.

She clocked out and called out a general goodbye to anyone still left on the front end before heading out.

The storm had only worsened since the power had shut off, rain pouring down in buckets that left the parking lot half flooded. And of course it was the day that Mermista had forgotten her jacket. She huffed before shoving her hand into her pocket and grabbing her car keys.

“Mermista?” Sea Hawk called out after her from the lobby.

“Ugh, what?” she groaned.

“I… don’t have a car, and I walked here earlier, so I was hoping that maybe… could I bother you for a ride home?”

She stood there for a second, staring at him. The arrogance she had grown accustomed to over the last four hours had faded. He seemed… genuine, maybe. Besides, it was hard to say no to his almost pathetic attempt at puppy dog eyes.

“Whatever.” She gestured for him to follow her out to the parking lot. He smiled brightly and pulled his jacket off, wordlessly offering to use it to shield the both of them from the rain. She looked at him, at the warmth in his eyes, and smiled back before leading him towards his car.

As cliche as it seemed, Mermista had never felt more like the main character in a teen coming of age movie until that moment, sprinting through the rain with a boy she just met. It was cinematic gold, though she would definitely laugh at it if it was in a movie.

Of course, Sea Hawk’s attempt at an umbrella did not work in the slightest, and they arrived at Mermista’s car completely drenched. In any other circumstance, she might have begun complaining about getting water in her car, but… for reasons she wasn’t exactly sure of, it was different with him. She could complain all she wanted, but it still felt like he wanted to be around her.

It, honestly, was the first time she had felt that ever.

“So, uh, where do you live?” she asked, watching the way he struggled to get comfortable in the front seat.

“Not far,” he replied, running a hand through his wet hair. He gave her basic directions, but mostly sat in silence, quietly listening to whatever music Mermista was playing. “If I were driving, I would be playing the greatest sea shanties in all the lands! But alas, I shan’t change your music-”

“If you want to, you can.”

He stared at her for a moment, watching for any signs that she might be joking or otherwise insincere. She wasn’t. He took the aux cord and began to play his incredibly iconic sea shanty playlist.

While she often talked about hating everyone and everything, she actually enjoyed listening to Sea Hawk’s sea shanties. She also actually enjoyed his company, but she would rather be caught dead than admit that to anyone. She was even disappointed when she pulled up in front of Sea Hawk’s house.

“So… when do you work next?” he asked, looking over at her.

“Actually, not until December. I’m going on educational leave.”

“Oh.” He was quiet for a second before he spoke again. “Where do you go to school?”

“BMU. I’m going for marine biology.”

“I go there too! I’m commuting and working weekends.”

“Maybe I’ll see you around campus sometime then?” she asked, unfortunately sounding incredibly hopeful. It was not what she intended, but at the same time… it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if she would run into him again.

“Why, of course,” he said with a smile. “I must, however, be on my way. We shall meet again soon, my dear.”

And without another word, he disappeared silently into the night.

Well, not really, seeing as Mermista watched him trip going up the stairs, which totally ruined the dramatic effect he was going for. She didn’t care, though. It was endearing, to say the least.

She shook her head with a smile and began her drive home, actually excited about something for once in her life.